OP needs to stop enabling his parents who in turn enable his sister. He knows what they are all like, so he has to take responsibility for his actions.
Yep. OP has learned nothing. He's putting money into his parents retirement fund again and he's letting sister keep the money she swindled him out of. I have no sympathy with him whatsoever. No doubt he'll be setting up a college fund for her kid before long. What a dumbass.
She wasn't manipulated, she knew what she was doing. That's literally why she said 'you'll just refill it'.it's. "SHe cAmE tO mE tO cOmPlaIn" no she went to him to get him to pay for it.
Exactly. People want to protect the pregnant woman, because "Stress is bad for the child," but that doesn't mean she gets to walk all over you, and commit LITERAL CRIMES, without some commupance. OP should have gone to the police and hired a lawyer. Then, told his parents, "IT's a real pity you gave up your retirement to give her a luxury house, because now you will have to work until you die. Since you refused to respect MY CHOICE about MY MONEY, I will no longer contribute to YOUR life. It was always MY CHOICE to do so, because I loved and respected you. But now I see that you NEVER LOVED ME, AT ALL. IT was always, "DO BETTER, SON!" and "WE EXPECTED MORE FROM YOU, SON," and "GIVE EVERYTHING YOU HAVE WORKED SO HARD FOR TO YOUR SISTER AND TO US," and "DON'T YOU DARE MARRY THAT WOMAN, SON! WE DON'T LIKE HER, BECAUSE SHE MAKES YOU HAPPY, AND WE CAN'T HAVE THAT!" If it weren't for YOU, I would be married with kids by now, but OH, NO! You would NEVER allow me to marry or have a child, because that would take MY resources away from YOU! AND YOU ONLY EVER VIEWED ME AS YOUR PERSONAL BANK! So, NO! I DO NOT LOVE YOU OR RESPECT YOU, ANYMORE, and NONE OF YOU will get another PENNY from me! AND I am going to call CHILD PROTECTIVE SERVICES, because I ACTUALLY DO CARE about my niblings, and want to PROTECT THEM FROM YOUR POISON! You will DESTROY those innocent children. You created a MONSTER in your daughter, and she is a MONSTER to her husband AND TO HER CHILDREN! BECAUSE THAT IS WHAT YOU MADE OF HER! So, yeah. I'll call CPS to take her son away now, and remove her new baby from her custody, the MOMENT she gives birth. I hope she doesn't even get to HOLD the baby!" Then, follow through. MAKE THAT DRAMA! CALL THE POLICE! SUE THE PANTS OFF OF ALL OF THEM. SEEK CUSTODY OF THE CHILDREN! SAVE THEM FROM HER AND FROM THEIR HORRIBLE GRANDPARENTS! AND SAVE YOURSELF! Yes, I am screaming, because it NEEDS TO BE HEARD. OP, please. It's not too late. HIRE A LAWYER, NOW. You may not be able to get your money back, but you can, at least, save those poor innocent children from her. Phil seems like he's starting to see the light. So help him help his children. Hire a lawyer, and get HIM FULL CUSTODY, with ONLY SUPERVISED VISITS, or NOTHING AT ALL, from that TOXIC WOMAN, and the TOXIC GRANDMOTHER, and the WEAK-WILLED NOTHING of a grandfather. Honestly, if I were OP, I would ask Phil if he and his family would be willing to "adopt" you, and just go along with him, cutting off your entire family of origin.
Odds are it will be an uphill battle if the mother was authorised to use the account/was named on the account as there's no law against someone taking money from an account they're named on in an authorised transaction. There is potentially an elder abuse option but that depends on the mother's faculties.
@@Sara-wv3ms 🙌🏻 yaaaas! These misogynists should stretch so they don't blow their backs out from all that reaching! The sister is a QUEEN and he's just bitter because he's a sexist misogynist who abused her relentlessly for years and sis got that BAG!
She didn't steal the money her mom sent her his money, that's not stealing on her part 😂😂😂 a pregnant woman doesn't get a pass lol she's not just some pregnant woman she's his pregnant sister which is understandable why she would get a pass
Story 1: Phil needs to divorce her and go for FULL CUSTODY with only SUPERVISED visitation for her. OP's parents need to either cut the sister away from their money or get back to working full time.
I just do not understand parents like this. How do you decide to have kids but then only one of them gets everything from the parents at the expense of the other child. To literally think I'll use all of one child's help and money to give ALL to the other because this one will take care of everything I need.. What about him getting married, buying a house and having kids? Just pathetic.. He's pathetic that he's going to keep giving them money, didn't get his money back, nothing.. So, that's the doormat he is..
They would not LET him get married. She stopped him from marrying, several times. She ALWAYS screwed up his relationships, because she KNEW that if he got married, he would start to think of his own family, instead of them and sister.
Story 1,OP's parents are doormats and his sister is an entitled thief. Love the flea market sign.🤣 Oh yeah, Phil would be better off divorcing OP's sister.
I would 100% completely stop taking care of my parents at this point and go no contact whatsoever. I would be so done it would be as though they had never existed. I would let my parents know that if they need anything to ask their precious daughter and to never contact me again in my entire life because if they did I would call the police.
Part 2 was disappointing. OP not getting his money back made it so. That and the fact he enabled the entitlement of his sister in the end was also, wrong. She will never stop being entitled because she got away with so much. At least OP isn’t spending anymore of his money on sister’s entitlement or his ungrateful parents. Wished he would have went the route of taking that house and issued punishment for his parents betrayal. That would have made this story so much better.
I doubt he could have taken the house. His name is not on the deed in any way shape or form. He put money into a fund for his parents. Since he had given them access to the account, it is perfectly legal for them to do whatever they wanted to with it, including giving it to entitled sister to buy a house. I don't think he has any legal leg to stand on. He is a fool to start putting even small amounts of money into another account for them.
@@rolandhansen812 you are definitely right about the legalities on the house. Thx for commenting. OP did state something about taking the house, I just thought that meant demanding he have it drawn to his name so he could sell it and keep the money by way of mutual agreements within the family dynamics. As he would obviously need their cooperation on the matter. It would have been a hard fought battle so I get why he didn’t in the end. Entitled people can be draining. He would have been in the right to go that family cooperation route, tho. I was rooting for him to be made whole. Thx again for your comment, take care 👍
@@brobles8888 I was also very disappointed that sister actually triumphed. Even if husband leaves her, she got a house, they no doubt took a loss when selling the fancy house but still got another more modest place. She gets a house paid for by her brother's generosity to his parents. It's always more satisfying when bad people don't win. I guess I can see how he would want to give money so his parents wouldn't suffer in their old age, even after what they did. I still think he's a fool for giving more. I guess some people just can't help themselves but help their parents.
Brobles, did you hear the part he was adding funds in his parents account after his mom stole his money? Who would be that stupid to let his mom, steal from him and feel bad mommy needed him to save her?
Story 1: OP is the king of doormats. People talk about man’s tears a whole lot but I think the mark of a pathetic person is not stand to watch female tears even from a complete shrew and going “I felt bad for her”. He claims to love his sister when she would hit him with a bat at the slightest insult and was the damage control when his mother was put to shame due to sister’s histrionic meltdown.
Most men are biologically programmed to protect vulnerable people and nothing triggers that response quite like a woman in tears. Some women actively use that against men to be manipulative, turning on the waterworks in situations like this. I'd bet anything the sister is that kind of woman.
Well if you being raised as a doormat then you ARE a doormat. And people normally don't help you out of being one, they rather use you as such. You need other people do fix you because our "doormat" is their normal.
People need to stop being passive when family members or friends steal from them and press charges regardless of who did the stealing, their reasons for it or their life situation, if you do nothing then you have no right to complain. Thieves are predators and predators view EVERYONE as prey and will choose victims of convenience which means they'll start with those closest to them.
@@marleneperry6972 I agree, but I don't know what his ability to do that is in his country, but he should have at least charged her with theft, he had a witness to verify how many coins he had been given.
Story 2: OP is not taking the high road, he is being a doormat. The situation only kind of got solved because Lady B. karma decided to pay his sister a visit.
First story, he says he doesn't understand his sister and his mom think he needs to look in the mirror I'm not one that says you need to cut off people he needs to cut off people has a no contact. Scared his mom is going to hit him man you grab that hand and put her in her place pansy
It's disappointing that OP didn't fight to kick out his sister and get his money back Call me hearless, but being pregnant doesn't automatically give her a free pass on fraud
The more I listen to these types of stories, the more I have become convinced that "I took the high road" is code for I am still a doormat, and will complain to reddit about this but still give into their demands.
I made similar mistake mom was on my savings account first day after learning she wiped it out.$ 2300 the day after getting $315 + food $150 thinking I had money wrote checks that bounced since no money to cover MY checks. Then she lies straight to my face.until I told her well I have bank statement so whoever this $ 800 check embezzled from me I have appointment to have the crook arrested an hour later she remembered buying tires for damn car with only 3000 in town miles .perfect condition. I had to close my account. Then after receiving $9000 + $2300 told anyone who'd listen I never contributed anything. A cousin she didn't know was given power of attorney she stole everything gave to her son. Mommy dearest is dead.. yes she was a narcissist...
Can you say doormat? OP refilled a retirement account, why tell us this story. What did you learn? Nothing. Obnoxious sister just may be th e one with the brains. Good luck OP, you'll need it.
Obviously your parents aren’t mentally competent to handle their finances. Since your sister now has a paid for house, your parents can move in with your sister & she can support them. Be sure you have a strong wills neither your parents nor your sister gets anything. Call cps & report the health risks to her children due to pests.
When Phil should leave is problematic. Staying in a cantankerous relationship isn’t usually a good thing, but the child may still need an adult in the house.
He should file for divorce and FULL CUSTODY, and DEMAND that she 1) pay for CHILD SUPPORT, and 2) Pay for EMOTIONAL DAMAGES, because she has DAMAGED. And after that, he and OP should hire a lawyer to sue the pants off her for STEALING MONEY from 'An easily manipulated old woman, who is clearly senile. I mean, she thought it was a good idea to clear out her entire retirement fund? She needs to have that money returned, and be put into a DEMENTIA WARD at a retirment home, sinice she has CLEARLY LOST IT. She needs to have someone else have complete power of attorney over ALL her financial affairs, since she has shown she CANNOT THINK."
My mother-in-law did the same thing to my husband growing up like searching his room taking money and other items. The in-laws would use his money to pay their bills instead of their own.
Op's mom should demand the money they got from the sell of the big house. If they used some of the money from the sale of the big house to buy the smaller house then they should make payments on that as well. After all this was not mom and dad's money but Op's retirement fund for them and sister is not entitled to any of it. Also Op needs to make sure any large purchases go through him first. Why? Because when brother in law divorces sister, she will come crying for money in a few years.
He should demand all the money back and get her husband to get full custody of BOTH their children He sadly if far to soft on his toxic sister She needs a wake up call and as long as he Pampers to her demands and does nothing she will continue with her toxic behaviour As for his parents he should give them a monthly allowance and pay for the various things in a way that his sister cannot touch anything Pay the rent Pay the medical aid Pay for their food But just enough to ensure adapter cannot take any of it He thinks hes doing right by not disciplining his sister but he is only making it far worse As for mommy stealing his coin collection he should demand she re emburse him for all the coins she stole
Op needs to grow a spine and demand his parents/sister pay him back or sue them, stop giving his parents money, and go NC with his whole family as they all sound toxic AF.
The fact OP had let this go on for years, there is no way I would have accepted this entitlement 🤦🏾♀️... I also have a feeling the sister got pregnant on purpose. I also don't understand how kind people end up with people sometimes like OP's sister. 🙄
She is a thief and deserves a thiefs reward. And the drama queen thing? DOUBLE YIKES. OP talking about his mom punishing him with a slap...makes me crazy...what adult mom in her right mind would slap her adult son? OPs dad was also spineless. the BIL found his...hooray for him.
I think Phil should divorce her, by taking her to court, and PROVING that she is an UNFIT MOTHER. The bugs aren't the only thing. Her behavior towards family proves that she is TOXIC, and will DESTROY her children, if it suits her. He needs to SAVE those children from her, while SHAMING her, and demand emotional damages from her PLUS CHILD SUPPORT. Make HER pay for other people, for once.
As someone who's dealt with bedbugs, the LAST thing you want to do after being in an insect-infested environment is to go home like nothing has happened. You'll infest your car, and you'll infest your home. WALK home, strip completely naked in your garage, put your clothes in a tied-up garbage bag (tie it really tight), and then IMMEDIATELY go to your shower and wash everything. Saying that bedbugs are a nightmare is a huge understatement. They're really stealthy and can hide anywhere, can find you through walls, can survive extremely hot and cold temperatures for a long time, can survive on one drop of your blood for five months, have five children per day, and are immune to many poisons. Tempo dust is your only way to kill them, insist on your exterminator putting it on all places where the floor meets the wall or a door and on all bedposts. Then, buy a bedbug mattress cover for all mattresses, and wash your sheets, pillows, and sleeping clothes every single day. When you dry them, run them on highest heat in your dryer for at least 45 minutes, ideally 60 just to make sure the bedbugs die, then spray down your entire mattress cover and bedframe with 98% isopropyl alcohol (wear a gas mask, it's toxic in aerosol form). Spray it every single day when washing sheets. For five months. That's how resilient and smart those little fucks are.
OP is NOT, in fact, stuck with her. He's making that choice. He really should have gone full scorched earth sense they've already done this once. They'll do it again if given the chance.
Story 1, OP's sister should be forced to house OP's parents for the rest of their lives, since OP's ignorant mom gave her all of the retirement fund that OP had been working to save up for them. OP should never put any more money into the funding for their retirement.
When my older brother died my mother's LAST words to me about his were, " Oh God, what can I get out of him now?". That started a 20yr absolutely zero contact period. I only took her back because of Demetria and nano other family that would help her.
Melvin, Your mom deserves no help. She just used people. When it came time for her needing help her choice to be greedy and selfish, were the consequences.
Story 1: op still allowing everyone to walk all over him. He should not be helping parents at all. Atleast for a few years until they realized how they treated them
That last story: My family and one ex did this sh*t. They took most of my music collection, some cloths, two guitars, a bass amp, and my xmas tree. My ex hated everything I liked and those things would just disappear, he even gave away my kids things. My ex's mother also stole my ID and wrote down my SIN number. Now I'm having trouble getting a new health card because it has "suspicious activity" on it.
Dude you need that account to have a must be sign by me with them. If they try to take out money above 100.00 one hundred dollars. Make sure don't loan sister a dime ever and if mom and dad died make sure you seize that fund for you only.
S1: At the very least, OP could have ensured that his parents' retirement fund HE created was controlled by him and that he could spend money from it when he desired to release money Similar to grandparents creating funds for their grandkids but single mother stealing the money for her new car and other luxuries because the GP trust parents when it comes to their kids!
Some 5+ years ago A brain injury surfaced, and I messed up my finances something horrible. My son stepped up and had me take out bankruptcy and he took over my bill paying and gave me an allowance. Well this past April on my birthday (after the bankruptcy wad satisfied) we got into a big fight and he threw everything back to me. It took me about a month to get everything set up and then I noticed a big deficit in my account. $60,000+ was missing. I have thought long and hard about this. If I have a criminal investigation as to where the money went, at the very least it will cost him his job because he will lose his security clearance. I am not going to get the money back no matter what. He knows I know what he did. I am writing off the money and trying to forgive him - that is hard. Lord knows how hard
S1. OP should have seriously considered reporting the sister for Elder Abuse. Also, kept waiting for someone to refer to sister as the biggest pest of all.
OMG the floormat just keeps on giving in, he didn’t do shite, he just said some words and showed his mom that he’ll still contribute even after a gargantuan betrayal, I took the high road is code for I’m a coward in this situation, as he could have gotten the money back and then if he wanted to help the kids he could have just set up a small trust that only the kids and maybe the father could have access to as he seems to have had it with her trash and will not let her manipulate him anymore (one can hope). So yeah OP is a joke and will continue to be so. Freaking floormat.
Was hoping part 2 would have the OP growing a spine and reading the riot act to his entitled parents and sister, but nope, OP is still a worm who will bail them out and naively thinks things have changed. At least BIL grew his and isn't taking shit from OP's sister anymore, here's hoping he divorces her and gets full custody.
So the daughter can take in the parents when they retire, since she has all the retirement funds. Brother has done more than his fair share. They have created a monster and deserve to work the rest of their lives. I have never told my kids, " i raised you, now you owe me for the rest of my life". Go nc and enjoy your life.
Couldn't have been me because mom and entitled sister would've gotten sued! If mom wanted entitled sister to have a house then she would've had to get it on her own just like she laid on her back and got pregnant she could've got her own house or suffer. And since her mother kept emptying out set fund there's no way that I would've kept refilling it. They would've been left with nothing and been on their own. Pregnant or not my sister would've been on her own my mother too. Don't look to me for nothing because you made your bed lay in it
Op is happy that his sister is seen as the irresponsible one. Op your parents are worse they shaped her into an entitled a*s. Ops mom is more manipulative than the sister, he doesn't get that. I'm happy that he's trying but he needs 2 stop enabling his whole family. The advice the extended family gave him is on point. He's claiming that they just wanted drama, op your whole family is a drama. Remember that they where there for him but now he's forgotten all that
no let's back up here a second before you go down on your sister so hard like that we got to go back even farther to the mother cuz the mother created the daughter the daughter is acting just like the mother and the only thing the mother can do is give in because she knows what she did wrong
Story 1 and update: Things we could learn from OP's mistakes. 1. When an entitled family acts like you're still just a walking ATM to keep stealing from while thinking they're above you after stealing from you at a family get-together and even insulting a guest you bring... Don't bother to say anything it's a waste of breath so let your actions speak for you by just cutting them off... Oh and make sure they know there will be no more retirement fund account refills! 2. When entitled family members who enabled or stole money from you make you feel like crap and leave snide comments letting you know it was you they were talking about it's time to leave... Even worse when you find out your entitled sibling was an idiot who wasted your money on a pest-ridden house and she alongside your mother start looking over to you again as their walking ATM savior... just quietly leave. So at the end of this story, it's safe to say OP should consider going low or completely no contact with both parents and the entitled sister and stay that way just to preserve his sanity and learn to use more than the word no by letting his actions speak for him. Note to OP: Hopefully, you'll learn from your mistakes OP, and see that both your mother and sister are Toxic, and your father is Amapthy personified by just letting things happen. By the way, I know what I'll say next sounds cold but keep in mind your mother and sister sound like the type of people who only come to you when they need you but will fly out of the woodwork to cut off your life support if it makes them rich so please make sure you properly lawyer up to prevent that ... Oh, and before I forget, I'd consider recommending a divorce lawyer for Phil upcoming divorce with your sister A.S.A.P. before your parents decide you're supposed to help her again.
Where does this notion come from that a single person who has a good income needs to fork it over to others who have children? My money is my money, your money is yours. You get to live your life and so do I, in what universe am I responsible for your life?
I hope the husband really thinks hard about his wife/ OPs sister behavior and how it can/ will influence there children as they grow up. They will grow up seeing the entitlement, living above there means and expecting everyone else responsible basically to flip the bill. That’s a horrible example. She needs to do some kind of Thearpy to stop the behavior. I feel bad for OP being basically financially abused and manipulated by his mother and father so that the sister could live a lifestyle with such entitlement it’s not right and all the money he put aside for his parents that is that’s above most of us you know can do and for them to squander it is horrible I would wish I had the opportunity and the extra finances to do that for my parents and it’s showing how the parents are just entitled and basically expect it from the sun while most people children can do that.
The biggest problem is OP!! Anyone has to have a line, no matter WHO the person is! Related or unrelated! And as you see, she gets her karma in many ways! This is what narcissism brings!💯🔥🤦🏽♀️
I can imagine you would be furious Mr Reddito when it comes to Pokemon, the evidence of your favourite fandom is very clear that "You Gotta Catch 'em all" (We all have our fandoms/valued and favourite things that we see as valued 💜)
So I have a few ?s. For a retirement fund specifically named as a 401K means that the only money going in is coming from that persons job. The mother can put money in from her job. Note that no one else(other than her job possibly matching funds) has access to the 401K and cannot deposit any money, Now someone can do workarounds like paying the mother money to live on and she puts more in, but that is not what is stated. If this money is solely for the moms retirement legally she can spend it how she likes although if taken out before 59.5 years there are penalties involved. If she has spent it all then stop giving her money and let her handle her retirement issues herself. PS once you have so put money into her retirement fund it is technically her money and she is free to do with it as she wishes. So for your revenge on getting your sister to pay You back would go no where as it is your mother who is owed the money and she evidently likes giving your sister everything.
First Story: Sorry but the "high road" leads to OP having to support his parents while sis cries for money for her starving CHILDREN. She WILL find another sucker and try to baby trap him. Or some chad will do it.
