Psychosis: The Reality of a Mental Breakdown 

Next watch "Common Misconceptions About the Human Body:" ru-vid.com/video/%D0%B2%D0%B8%D0%B4%D0%B5%D0%BE-JzMF58SjbhU.html&

Most horrifying and unpredictable mental illness, it was the worst thing I've ever experienced, pure mental torture. I'm lucky I didn't have schizophrenia but at one point I thought I had. My breakdown was caused by alcoholism and depression

When I had psychosis, delusions dictated what I was going to do next. It was a time of Chaos and problems. When I was in it my perceptions were ultered and my reality was this : I was going through enlightenment, I was on a mission to spread the light, and there were enemies who will try to stop me. The problem is, I traveled countries during this time making me absolutely vunrable to everything. I was not in my usual environment. And I was simply budding heads with everyone. I destroyed my family by leaving my husband believing he wanted to kill me. And then later on believing the people I stayed with were also evil. It was so terrifying. I was always terrified. At times I was extatic and could believe I was flying. My time perception changed, it felt very long and very slow at the same time. My perceptions of others changed. My perceptions of morality changed. Everything changed. The most painful period is the period post psychosis. Because this is when you have to face the consequences of this psychosis. Unfortunately, there is no going back in time. The pain of remorse for having made choices based on false belief is extremely painful. The pain of loosing people you deeply love because of this is absolutely unbearable. I guess it'll take me a few more years to forgive myself and to construct a new sense of self and a new sense of self respect. I lost it all. What pains me the most is that my delusions were based on my faith in God. I deeply believed that my delusions were the way God communicated with me. My hallucinations were super powers that distinguished me from other and brought with them the responsibility of following the right path. I believed that I was the soulmate of a famous actor and I wrote to him relentlessly trying to convince him why we were soulmates. I genuinely believed he would end up coming to visit me and I was wondering what I should wear when he comes. I believed social Media was also a way God and the angels spoke to me. I would have "meetings" with the angels to decide on the fate of very important matters. I really truly believed I was god's angel on a mission to spread the light. The "what if.." haunts me all the time. What if I went to the hospital and explained everything to them. What if I decided to stay with my husband. What if I had blocked that man that I thought was god sent... Would I have saved a bit of self respect and self esteem today ?? I wish I could go back in time and changed one thing.

This is the only thing I've watched that has been able to perfectly capture what this feels like.

I felt my anxiety spike through this video. Freaked me out how much is relateable

I don't usually hear voices but the second time i had psychosis i was in a dishevelled mental state due to a fear of disappointment from my father over something i had done that was so trivial. In a moment i heard a cartoonish voice say to me "you're an idiot!" And then that's when my mum drove me to the hospital. The first time I heard a voice was when i was a young child and i was trying to fall asleep. I would have nightmares every night, some recurring and i was sweating a lot due to the fear of falling asleep. An old man yelled my name and gave me a fright. I believe these voices to be a manifestation of my ego and self loathing mostly.

It's comforting knowing death will come. and it's courageous to keep one foot in front of the other. Suicide will not win!

What a beautiful video to be made about something so horrifying. I’ve has dpdr and its a whole world of isolation and suffering.

I don't know why but i feel a tremendous urge to hug you. I hope everyone finds their own rock eventually.

I was 19 when I first had panic attack.... Soon after a year i had my depersonalization experience man o man i thought panic attack was worst but this thing it hits you like an atomic bomb your soul seems to be snatched out of your body you can see yourself see the things around but couldn't act inside you're completely dead ..... And then after you come back to reality it's worst breakdown... I'm 25 now and still taking antipsychotics for my panic and anxiety disorder .... The way out is not easy even quitting these drugs isn't that easy the withdrawal symptoms crushes you but at the end of the day we know if there is evil there is god ... Bad there's good.... And if it's a disease there's a cure deep down I'm gonna find the solution someday coz no doctor can help you with psychiatric disorders but only you with the help of your will.. make it out .... good luck and trust yourself fellas we are all the same flesh and bones you just need to learn to drive the car which is your mind

Beautiful piece of art I can relate to. It also took me some time through my existence to figure this ''disorder'' and live with it. Dissociation is heightened ability which gives us different outlook on the world around us. It was scary at first being always so disconnected and just an observer of everything but also liberating to be able to see reality through the bullshit and understanding that there is no cure, there is also nothing to hold on to. Everything is here temporarily. Everything moves and changes and then dissapears into nothing. It hurts but this bitter truth we must swallow, go with the flow and evolve, killi some time here by aspiring to do something epic because we know that eventually we'll go back into nothing from where we came from. Time is ticking. Suicide is pointless.

His description of psychosis gave me chills.

this is all i can hope for anyone who has ever experienced "psychosis". i like how there is no talk about what led him to have insomnia at 6 yrs old. it can make one speculate, or not.

This is just outstanding, one can relate to the horror without having gone through the same oneself. Bravo!

Thank you so much for sharing your experience. Others who experience this won't feel alone anymore. We can all be mistakes together and find our rocks ⛰️

this is an existential crisis and facing the deep dark reality that we really don't understand much of anything, our existence, this planet, space...any of it, all of it...especially without a spiritual belief system that makes sense to you...yes, you just keep going from one rock to the next, each time setting your sights on a rock a little further away...and pretty soon the path between the rocks feels more normal. you have to have proper nutrition, sleep, goals, socialization, even light at certain times and diversity of experiences to help interest your mind away from disfunction,

One should only break down in French, or else never.

Makes sense. Whatever thoughts I had about killing myself, I realized I had too many nieces and nephews and didn't want to leave them with thoughts of a possibility 'suicide' is in their genes. Life is hard enough for the younger generations. So it always 'flips'- it's not all about 'me'.

There is a lesson here about gaining perspective: there are people out there who are worse than you (probably). Also, there are other people out there.

Thank you. anxiety disorder tortures me for many years.

Mental health has been hitting me over the head lately

This is so well made and underrated, they should get more recognition

This is so depressing and sad ...may god help them who are suffering

*I had a mental breakdown last month and died my hair purple*

It's strange how different people interpret this phenomenon. I actually enjoy disassociation, it's comforting and a nice "escape" when present reality becomes overwhelming. The mind is just trying to protect itself, so it takes you away in times of extreme stress or anxiety. It's terrible when you disassociate to the point of losing your memory, or when it happens all the time, for seemingly no reason. But I can do it at will and have to stop myself.

very beautiful Installation, thank you for sharing the story

This is really well done everyone should watch this

At last they declared to me that I was becoming dangerous and that they should lock me up in a madhouse if I did not hold my tongue. Then such grief took possession of my soul that my heart was wrung, and I felt as though I were dying; and then . . . then I awoke.

I found my rock too.

This video goes too hard, awesome job!

This was really well done

felt strange to watch that...from my own experience

Thanks! I am in the community too. Great presentation. No one could have done this as well as you did. My version of depersonalization: It's felt like multiple personality, but when I try to find who I was, there was no one there. I practiced meditation to find me. I read lots of books by meditation masters. They indicated to me that the farther you go along this path in trying to find yourself, you find out that there is no one there. It seems you have had a relatable experience to this. I don't need to be "me" to be me. Whoopee, here we go!

This was amazing.

That’s exactly how I feel everyday

when you're french but you're also like "whyd i fcking google that"

Overthinking.. of what isn't there, the mind can play tricks.

I know the feeling of drinking so often your brains on fire and it hurts so bad you have to take cold showers just to get through the pain in your head. You end up walking in a fog everything becomes unreal you start freaking out randomly and eventually you put yourself in a place where your all alone. People love you but you can’t seem to break out even tho loved ones are trying so hard to pull you out then it gets darker you start staring into nothingness and then you eventually don’t feel anymore and that’s the darkest place

When I was in the psych ward there was a boy there with severe psychosis. He would just stand there and stare, he would walk into bathrooms when people were in there, he wouldn’t come out his room most of the time but his roommate said he just sat there and stared at the wall

i had it , it was like someone who follow me when i went to darkplace. it happened when i was secondary

this is how i feel

My problem is, I have not enough tissue to cry it all out or to feel my emotions. Too much trauma too close to each other. Slipping faster and faster daily.

Great content!

Excellent! Merçi pour votre partage...he suis une 'rican, mais acôte du Lyon, j'ai entendu la voix de la Dieu. J'ai manic depressive 1 avec psychosis. Votre video est important. J'espere que vous faitez plus...bravo.

Same experience, almost a year now since my attack..been recovering but not yet there

Had issue long ago it was brain chemistry issue from cancer and medicine. No one believes me now..

Ty!❤

"I'm a mistake. Life is a mistake. Universe... the earth is a mistake". He keeps repeating that because that's what psychosis and DpDr do, repetitive thoughts that barely make sense yet they keep playing like a mantra in your head, making you feel alone, terrified and worthless.

bravo, just bravo.

VIVE LE QUÉBEC, LET’S GO!

This sounds more like panic and fear than psychosis. I'm no expert on the latter, but have lived with anxiety and panic disorder all my adult life. What he is explaining sounds exactly the same symptoms I have experienced at times. I found the more you surrender, let go and give in to the experience of depersonalisation the quicker things come right. The more you panic and fight it, the worse it gets. Still, a powerful account of whatever he experienced, but with no real resolution. He just kept going? I'm a bit confused by the ending. Thanks.

Yes.

I had a comment exchange many years ago here on RU-vid where by about the fifth reply it became clear the guy on the other end had progressed into a psychotic break. His first reply was quite normal but each one that followed, the choice of words, pattern, cadence... became more disturbing. Very sad experience for me.

Never had one my girl said she's having one rn watching this vid on the way to her house rn

I need to find a rock

um, did this induce dpdr for anyone else? luckily I'm not clinical, but it happens to me sometimes.

Those captions are too small.

j'avais un experience tres similaire. c'etait tres difficile de comprendre pour moi aussi. meme maintenant! chaque person qui experience derealisation est sans espoir mais au meme temps, l'espoir est le seulement chance quand vous etes desespoir assez de mourir. bon chance, mon ami.

its possible to recover from even the most extreme dissociative disorders. No medication does not mean no treatment. It just means no treatment that the medical establishment can profit from.

third eye GANG

May be im not different may be life is the way I see I. The world is disgusting working to survive is control why read a book to be educated seek ur own answers not be taught by some one who was educated by another individual. I follow my heart talk to trees constantly think of suicide or murder my any can supercede my happiness. Things I cherished desired and wants and needs no longer have meaning I much prefer the beautie of a women's aura than the Want to sleep with or impress her foe my own gains . I see beautie in things most ignored and I'm sickened by what most desire . I work yo provide for my wife and her children smd worry what will happen if I stop ! Not for my self but worry for them I could happily pack a bag and disappear from this life world universe and see what the next chapter has in store but deep down something stops me . I'm strong and no I csn survive as I'm still here surrounded by people but so alone eventually I know it will all come to a end it's just the waiting and unknowing but in one way it's something to focus on whilst I'm here . Be good people kind humble helping ❤ bye 😊🎉

what is that accent? my french sucks but i am barely able to identify words, where normally i get the gist of a sentence here and there wtf (I presume it's canadian)

Nobody is thought this guy was Eminem for a second?

Drugs relaxed different then psychoses for Months on no stopping no medicin helping no rock

francias?

This doesn't sound like psychosis, but the fact that reading saint ex cured him is pretty cool.

Je comprends trop bien. 💔

PEOPLE LISTEN: IF YOU HAVE THE STUFF LIKE HIM YOU SHOULD HELP A SCARED CHILD AND YOU WILL OVERCOME IT!!

I had from pot

This

Depersonalization. Sounds like living hell, like being stuck in a factory farm - "I am a mistake. Life is a mistake. Existence... The universe is a mistake." Well said. Should have stayed vegan. It least then only one sentient being is depersonalized. Doing no harm, or as little as possible, gives you worth - makes you worthy to enjoy life. Frolic like an innocent... (but first become innocent).

Only Sarxkyn can cure permanent psychosis

Uh.... ok...

Mental breakdown silly

🎱🎱🎱

Spoiler alert it’s freaking French

Shit, I hate reading videos

I would watch it all but I don’t like the music

Not interested

so fake

First comment :/

Make it in English or don’t post shi for America at all, we speak English not chenzod enamzk

Boring

if your going to speak French label your video in french

he need Jesus it happen because he sin he need pray for God forgive then he cured

I'm sorry I thought this was america

I havent cried sober in so long. I cant fathom my rock and everything is washing away from me.

I had one while driving 🥹 I don’t know how I made it