Real Families: Overcoming Selective Mutism in Children 

aww

Wow! Thanks so sweet

I was the same

My little sister did too, starting from age 4. The school didn’t believe she could talk until we showed them some home videos. They started to put her in a nurture room as she got older and still wasn’t talking. It was a quiet room full of books, toys, computers and more, with kids like herself. They actually all started talking to each other in little pairs and made it their little spot where they’d all take their lunch to the nurture room and hang out for the whole lunch, funnily enough🤣 they all progressed and branched out to make new friends and now that my sister is 11, it’s amazing to see how far she’s come. She went from not even talking to my grandma, auntie, uncle and cousins during visits, to starting her first day of year 7 all talkative and full of energy and having long phone calls with her friends on the phone. She now makes the most hilarious jokes at my grandma’s house and has the whole family laughing and it’s crazy to think that she never even spoke to them. She’s amazing. I love her so much

Same here

You are so right. There is NO SUCH THING as a 'perfect child'

Yes!

exactlyno one or anything is perfect

I had to be a perfect kid in school 😐 and I a, the way I am because of that. I’m not like a bad person and rarely acted out in school because I had to be perfect

As a kid I agree! I'm tired of being compared to people like Cesar Millan(he's a dog trainer) or my cousin!

I wish I had a friend like that 😅

So cute. I feel bad for her 😢

Yeah it was so nice to see how supportive the other kids were, Henry's friends too stood by him.

Aww I wish that my friends were super supportive...instead of blocking me on FB.

@@AmandaConocido same :(

My Journey With Meadow it’s different for everyone but they could be lying

My Journey With Meadow its different for everyone. how are you going to tell someone they're lying and roll eyes about it like you really know them. Maybe they just could be recording when it's not happening.

My Journey With Meadow your rude and probably a karen too.

My Journey With Meadow I'm not 12 but you are acting like a Karen telling someone they're lying you don't know them. You don't know everything about everyone's brain so just stop.

chyan or I’ll continue commenting on a public video, because I can 🤷🏽‍♀️

What if she didn't feel comfortable enough to? The whole class would have been mad at her for not getting ice cream. I mean its great that didn't happen tho

I have selective mutism and I do gymnastics Im 10 I'm scared to go to school I'm going to 5th grade

@@christopherhiggins3563 as long as you're happy... and if youre not do what makes you happy. :)

I had a child who was selectively mute in my class and another child could be hitting them take their toys from them and the child wouldn’t even cry. They wouldn’t peep. If it was safety I would have to step in, if it were toys at first I wouldn’t. I had to be this child’s voice and help them feel comfortable before they would even cry or ask for help.

H T I agree, looking back at it as an adult I don’t think it was the best or most mature way for the teacher to handle the situation (which wasn’t hers to handle)! Luckily it worked out but it easily could have gone another way

I think she just meant that somehing physical would be easier to deal with than mental. Which I think is a normal thing to think. It's much easier to deal with say, a broken arm, then say, depression or anxiety.

@@shevahauser1780 I have mental issues and it's very true what she said.

Sheva Hauser that’s right but, did she really had it to put it like that?? it’s so harsg

Yeah I was about to make a comment on that. It is very sad she said that

Sounds devastating but, I don’t think you’d understand unless you’re going through it.

Very well said :)

Absolutely love this comment ❤

UM THANKS

Tysm

THANK YOUUUU

I made it 100 thanks

You're the unsung hero

I thought they were his brother because the way the talk about him. It’s heartwarming

That was so nice to see.

God bless you for being such a good teacher.

How did you help her? I've a student with a quite similar situations as yours and finding it difficult to get her out of it. Thank you!

Amazing

U did the right thing helping ur student

@@heshanidelange8186 sorry for the late response! im horrible with youtube comments. I didn't necessarily get her out of her myself. i got her tested which she in turn qualified for SPED support. with that she was able to get goals which helped her open up. goals that were "in-line" with her educational needs like talking and verbal expression. she still whispers after two years later, but she now talks to adults.

Yeah I wonder the same thing. She was definitely making progress by the end of the documentary though. She was engaging in one-on-one play and communicating with that other little girl. But obviously shut down again when she was with the whole class. Guess it’s just something you have to take baby steps with, like anything.

yuki cross yes but they want her to improve

@yuki cross It's not so much about that...it's that she needs to be able to communicate in every day situations. Her education will suffer, she won't be able to communicate her needs or if she's hurt. I've known of kids who are selective mutes that literally will not tell anyone they are hurt. I know someone literally broke his arm and they only found out when he got home.

I’m selective mute. People try pressuring me into speaking with people. It ain’t very nice. Makes me not wanan talk to people and makes communication feel like a chore and set my anxiety off even more than it already is

Katherine can speak now I was in that class that she was in I am the browned hair girl with the fringe that was in front of her and was friends with her and also this was nearly 10 years ago that they filmed it

Same - autistic and still selective mute though not as bad as a kid, and also because of bullying. I found that if I kept my mouth shut people would forget I existed, but if I opened it anything I said would be turned into a weapon to hurt me. Silence was easier.

same here I am also special needs I have the signs of autism and got bullied all through primary school and high school

I’m autistic and was also selective mute during middle school. But I ended up talking to my teachers and friends at high school, which helped me. I was scared of being bullied, but I had friends and teachers that would help and protect me if that ever happened (which never did). And whoever says teachers don’t do anything or don’t care, get a life. Not all teachers are like that. Learn what difference means

Fr

Amen

Shut up

This was me all throughout childhood and as a result i was sent to special schools and classes. At one point called stubborn by a teacher and put in time outs. Very glad to know it is recognized today and there are other people out there who are the same. It is a struggle that is for sure.

Same here. I never got diagnosed with anything. My parents got told I would grow out of it. The teacher would stop the whole class lesson to demand that I speak and answer him. Classmates got so upset with me all the time. Now I have two autistic kids. One severely

yep me too I was horrificly bullied about it throughout school

Me too ❤

Same, I know how you feel. ❤️❤️❤️

I hated school

Same

I hated school too, but I do love school. But I have some very (not all the time) naughty students in my classroom So one time, some students (they also teens) gave unkind comments to another student (my other classmate)

I actually had to go to what they called pre first grade because I was so scared and shy in Kindergarten that they said I wasn't ready for first grade yet.

camryn keeney that is so sweet

No! You need to try finding her again! That would be an amazing reunion!

I hope you guys ended on good terms ❤❤

So i don't have sm but this description perfectly what i felt like through the whole of school. I was just called shy and told to try and speak up in class more.

While I was watching I was wo during if zoom classes would be helpful. I'm glad it was helpful for you!

Online school was a lot better for some people. It's too bad it's not always an option.

I am 15 and the same way.

Yess, I'm 17 too. I always participated in zoom chats, finally got to live out the dream of answering a question I knew was right 😂 miss that

Kathi Dori ok?...

@@maryxvlone5003 ( Yes, I'm ok, I should accept people as they are ) . I'm sorry to show my disappointement, when those brave kids and parents in this video are struggling with so heavy conditions.

Kathi Dori ok

Your almost 70

Kxley ikr

It is just a scence of success when you are first :)

Second to comment on your comment 🌚

Your right, some people might have asthma or something else that you don't even know. I have a disorder that doesn't allow my body to make certain hormones, but if you looked at me you'd just guess I'm short.

Yea frick normal weird is awesome 😎 I should know it’s my strong suit

You humans are so annoying ❤️🥰✨✨✨✨🥰❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️🥰🥰🥰🥰✨✨✨✨✨✨✨

Just to clarify I've been diagnosed with selective mutism

Me too! It didn’t happen for me until I was older but it feels so isolating. I even struggled with these issues into my young adult years which was really upsetting, until I finally got help for my anxiety. My only regret now is not having taken care of the problem sooner, but I always a kid who never wanted to have anything “wrong” with me. I did not like labels and just wanted to be the same as other kids. But now I’ve learned to just not care what others think and just live my life the ways that work best for me! 🥰

I was the same way. My parents were defensive about it so I never got any help or therapy. It took a lot of overcoming in my own head and I've accepted that I will always have to deal with it. I'm glad you're taking steps out of your comfort zone, you've got this!

Not necessarily. I talked a lot at home but when I went to catechism I didn’t speak at all. I was just really shy. I was short and so I had someone pick me up and carry me down the stairs. I have no mutisms, just shy but as an adult I’ve grown to be more outspoken than shy. Not every person shy and quiet has mutisms or something wrong with them. They may just be shy around other people and then grow out of it in adulthood.

*hugs* I’m sorry to hear that

Yes I agree

How did they not know you understood the work? As long as the work is written down then there's proof you understand

@@elliex4136 some schools are slow ☺

I think it was probably more because when young kids are in school they're expected to reach certain developmental milestones by a certain point. And being able to speak and communicate with others is one of those milestones. So a child with selective mutism is arguably struggling to get to that milestone, which for some schools is grounds for holding that child back.

@@elliex4136 my point exactly!

@@jupitersnoot4915 unfortunately these teachers did not like me I was the only one they singled out, they would make me eat lunch in the class by myself while everyone went to the cafeteria, would make me sit in the dark class and would Rip up stuff I had done. Fortunately I only went there a year.

Also, my family had to record me reading books at home, as they weren’t able to prove I could actually read so we would keep a record through filming me at home!

same but i think i was seven

Same goes for me.

Most of us with it have had comments like that, I thought it was only me that had this back when I was younger.

Could I please ask which country you are from and what medicine it was?

:)

Agreed. I feel so bad for Adam. Just seems like he's got it pretty rough.

Uea

Yea

Sameee

yes, she could be autistic or ADD/ADHD (or both). it is more common in neurodivergent people to shut down and this can mean going mute, usually because of sensory processing difficulties. or she could be socially overwhelmed, or both. v interesting

I have to disagree. I think she has exactly what they say she has, selective mutism.

I thought that or anxiety my little girl has anxiety she's also very intelligent so she reacts differently than average children, we have a lot of struggles the main comment we get is wow Ellie is a genius you guys are so lucky if only they knew what we have to go through and her to go through at times

Same now....

exact

Okay...?

edgy much???

cool, would you like a reward for that?

we get it your quirky

Um Okkk anyone else

I also suffered in the 60 s. Teachers made me sit in front of the class and screamed at me , when there was class parties I was sent in the hall , Kids were encouraged to make fun of me , my parents would tell the school how I would talk at home and how good I could read but they didn’t believe it they had my parents take me to a psychiatrist who said I should be put in an institution but they refused , the dr told me I was a baby cause only babies don’t speak and I should wear diapers and I would never have friends ,after a few sessions my parents stopped taking me , the principal would call me in his office and ask why I was so stubborn and didn’t talk , recess was a nightmare kids would chase me and take my stuff and no one did anything , I think they thought I would eventually tell them to stop ,I did make one friend from 4 to 6 th grade , she was nice to me and eventually I would whisper to her and then talk to her outside of school , I just couldn’t bring myself to speak all through elementary school , when I got to middle school at 13 I did start talking to a few kids and then answering teachers questions and I felt more comfortable but I was still considered shy , years later when I was in high school wr heard the phrase selective mutism and we figured out what I had , my son ended up having it also but then I knew what it was

@@nancydambrot5941 That's just awful. The adults were the cruel ones. They couldn't see past their own belief that it was a disciplinary problem. I'm sorry you went through that. Clearly the trauma of these childhood experiences are felt long into adulthood.

I'm like you right now ,I feel like dying

Mine was in preschool I was even too scared to put my hands up

@Sunny Quackers Is he autistic?

@Sunny Quackers it's not a label, it's a diagnostic. Being autistic isn't an insult. Has he been followed by a psychologist at all?

I suppose when they want to communicate and interact they feel lost.

prayers are being sent your way. :)

Thank you so much!

I agree. Also when she says “It’s not that it is his fault” and then nods her head! I’m so pleased he got his long awaited diagnosis but I didn’t like the psychologist

Ms Sagittarius Same here, I don’t know what to say to others

Jill Owls lol same

That’s horrible. I’m sorry this happened to you.

Thank you for being so consistent and suppotive for that child. I hope my 5 y.o. will meet someone like you to get over her selective mutism.

This episode has already been uploaded on youtube

No you're not i felt exactly that way when i was in school. You are not alone feeling like this

i have it as well also selective mutism sometimes can be a anxiety disorder also some kids may grow out of selective mutism although its not always possible but some kids may be stuck with it but all you need to do is give y.o a bit of time until he/she is comfortable :)

:)

same im 13 this year i sturlein school tho :(