Self-Esteem Requires External Validation | Fred Neuhouser on Rousseau 

Don't ever,EVER give up...be strong, stay strong 💪

Hey Mhammad, thanks for writing and sharing. Sounds a lot like when I got into philosophy. It was THE low point of my life: failed startup, relationship troubles. It was only through that experience that I realized how necessary philosophy was to help me live a better life. So, in the long run, it was a blessing in disguise. Without the pain and frustration I don't think I would have been nearly desperate enough to spend time reading those difficult old books that everyone was telling me I should read. So i hope philosophy can console you in your current struggles now and that you will walk out of this period with a lifelong appreciation for these books.

ChatGPT answer to how to domesticate your amor prop: Domesticating or managing amor prop (the desire for recognition and esteem from others) involves several strategies aimed at fostering a healthy balance between external validation and intrinsic self-worth: 1. **Cultivate Intrinsic Motivations:** Encourage activities and pursuits that foster genuine interest and passion in individuals. This can include hobbies, creative endeavors, and learning experiences that provide intrinsic satisfaction rather than relying solely on external praise. 2. **Promote Self-Awareness:** Help individuals develop a strong sense of self-awareness and self-reflection. This includes understanding personal strengths and weaknesses, values, and goals beyond external expectations. 3. **Encourage Self-Compassion:** Foster a mindset of self-compassion and acceptance. Teach individuals to be kind to themselves, especially in moments of failure or criticism, recognizing that self-worth is not solely dependent on external validation. 4. **Focus on Personal Growth:** Shift the emphasis from comparing oneself to others towards personal growth and improvement. Encourage setting realistic goals and celebrating progress based on individual achievements rather than external benchmarks. 5. **Teach Resilience:** Help individuals build resilience to setbacks and criticism. This involves developing coping strategies, problem-solving skills, and maintaining a positive outlook even in challenging situations. 6. **Support Authentic Relationships:** Encourage meaningful connections based on genuine mutual respect and understanding rather than superficial admiration or validation-seeking behaviors. 7. **Role Modeling and Guidance:** Provide positive role models and mentors who demonstrate healthy self-esteem and balanced relationships with recognition and validation. By integrating these approaches, individuals can develop a more balanced and resilient sense of self-esteem that incorporates both intrinsic motivations and healthy social interactions, thereby domesticating amor prop in a constructive manner.

I am even in shock to see 43k now, because last two weeks was just less that 20k... It's really going to blow up...

Can't wait for you to see it what's coming down the pipeline.

Thanks it was the Berlin Altes Museum. They were kind enough to let us use it for free. Although to be frank I think that this venue lacks intimacy and the audio came out pretty echo-y so will do more library settings going forward.

@@bi.johnathan the echo was fine and added to the depth of what was being discussed imo

@@SS-kg8rj haha thanks. glad someone at least likes it

Propre can have a few different meanings, including clean, but in this case it means something along the lines of self. In common language amour-propre, therefore, means self-love, elf-esteem or even vanity.

I agree with you that the relationship is like a reservoir model - that is across a life. But where did we suggest otherwise. The claim was never “you constantly need external validation to sustain self-esteem.” In fact, that’s what Neuhouser is getting at with his example of having received recognition early in his career such that the possible rejection of his essay will not be devastating.

Share with your friends if you have any that would be interested! And if you have the $ to spare, become a paid subscriber at greatbooks.io