self help channels are lying to you 

It's been about 7 months since I posted this video and during that time I've seen a lot of people worry about me. Please know that I am doing pretty GREAT at the moment, its odd but I feel like this video was sort of a reset point for me and ever since I've been experiencing a pretty long period of bliss. Just know that theres always hope out there and that even the worst times in your life can change into something pretty great, thought I'd leave this here because I think it leaves this video on more positive of a note :) have a great day everyone

Another thing I want to mention about the "eating healthy" bit is that cooking a healthy meal at home takes time and effort. Who the hell gets home from their third job of the day and wants to stand around and cook?

oh my goooood. I can't believe they pulled an "rich people eat healthier". uh, yes, because they have MONEY. that's the whole point. poor people sometimes can barely afford to have three meals a day, and these dishonest people wanna compare that to rich people that can hire a chef and buy expensive groceries at whole foods every day? it's almost a joke, I can't comprehend the complete lack of self awareness these gurus possess.

A guy I use to work w worked 80 hours a week and still struggled to help pay for his family. He never complained. But other factors go into causing poverty and many people don’t recognize it. This man I knew left another country and had to start all over again here. He didn’t have the money to invest or save because his paychecks all went to bills. I remember reading an article from a woman living paycheck to paycheck, she really put it in perspective for me. She would work long hours and save, then her heater would break or her tire would pop. And because of those things that were out of control, the little she had in her savings would have to be emptied and she would have to start all over again. Poverty is a sometimes endless cycle that is incredibly hard to break out of, no matter how much work you put in.

Gary Vee likes to pretend that he started from nothing and grinded his way to the top, but his dad had a multimillion dollar wine business. I'm sure Gary grinded his ass off to turn his dad's 3 million dollar business into a 50 million dollar business, but the average person who is looking to him for help doesn't have that kind of seed capital, and telling them that they can grind their way to wealth in the gig economy is fucking delusional.

wow this is a really good video!!! this is definitely not just Pinely commenting from James' PC btw, thanks

What Gary Vee says: I work non-stop, no holidays, no time off, just work. What I hear: I'm so inefficient at my job that I have to work much longer hours than others. I work hard, not smart.

It's always wild to me hearing people with money tell working class folks that we need to give up every little pleasure in order to have better lives because when I first became poor as an adult, I had a friend who had been poor for years coaching me on how to survive poverty, and she told me the exact opposite. Her instructions were to always set aside a little grocery money for a treat (like cheap ice cream) because if you completely stop getting yourself things that make you happy in the name of saving money, you will eventually go insane.

"I didn't go out on weekends! I didn't take vacations!" Translation: I wasted my life working non-stop and doing nothing fulfilling.

I use to work 4 jobs. I was working 7 days a week. Going to the gym, going on BS diets and being completely exhausted all the time. But guess what? I was still poor because all my jobs were minimum wage and the cost of living in my city is atrocious. It's like these people have never even heard of minimum wage.

It also just.. Feels ableist on top of it all? Like these people ate basically saying the only people who deserve to live in financial stability or happiness are those who can physically work. Which is just not the case for so many people

I suffer with severe mental issues and have fibromyalgia… people like this anger me so much because they make it out like everyone can put in that work when in reality it would kill people like me

Evil capitalists basically telling you "be a good little machine for the system!" while I'm over here foolishly having dreams and ambitions to enjoy my life rather than making every waking hour about some chase for cash...

i hate the “why are you complaining about being poor if you get starbucks and have netflix AND hulu?” argument. humans should not have to sacrifice simple pleasures in an attempt to maki more money to be able to live???

That "don't buy $4 coffee daily" garbage is just a way of blaming people with less for what they don't have. Sure, being wasteful with money isn't great, but never having a nice thing.. a reward for a good week, a consolation for a bad one, etc, those are the bits of joy you grab as you go. If you don't buy yourself a nice drink once a week, sure, at the end of it you'll have an extra $200 at the end of the year, but it's not going to change your life.

Yknow who worked full days and took zero time off? My great grandfather. Yknow what that got him? Dead in his 40s with hardly any money saved because he only made $900 annually. His teenage son ended up having to leave school and start his “grind”, even after he found a college he planned on attending. I hate how “the grind” is so glamorized when some people have no choice. Some people work full days and their kids still can’t have birthdays or get the attention they need. Some people work three jobs because their parents will die without it. If that’s what you want, fine, but I can’t stand hearing that “if you work nonstop for 20 years, that’s guaranteed success”. That is almost never the case. They’re not “bad with money” they’re the cogs that keep capitalism running. Someone’s always gotta be oppressed. Someone’s always gotta be working harder than they’re earning. That’s the way the system is designed. AND I KNOW WE ALL KNOW THIS, SO WHY DOES GARY STILL HAVE ANYONE FOLLOWING HIM

I never really found that self-help content helped me, the opposite actually: it just made me feel worse about not doing the things they suggested, and overwhelmed by all the tips. I know now that I'm neurodivergent, and the way my brain works likely doesn't align with the way these creator's minds work. The one thing that actually helped me with procrastination was something I worked on in counselling: self-kindness. Being kind to myself has made a massive change in my ability to actually do things, and it started with giving myself permission to not do things. Permission to make mistakes. Permission to not have to do it all perfectly and permission to not be able to do things at 100% most of the time. If you're here in the comments looking for advice, that's my advice to you. Take things one step at a time, give yourself explicit permission to fail, and see how it goes. Take it as a long-term project to see what happens if you're kinder to yourself. After all, if what you're currently doing isn't working, maybe this will. It's scary to start giving yourself permission to fail, but it has helped me tremendously.

Working non stop to live up to some “status~quo* is a huge proponent to familiacide.

The coffee thing always pisses me off. I'm mostly a very frugal person but I also spend about 70$ a month at coffee shops as a student (going out twice a week for a coffee and a snack) but those little trips are what gets me out of the house and exploring the city. Its a way to try good food without shelling out 30+ bucks on dinner or drinks. I go more for the atmosphere and the little adventure and the social connection ranther than for the coffee, so making instant coffee at home isn't really a replacement (I did that over the omicron wave and it sucked). Maybe if I didn't do that I'd have an extra 800 bucks in the bank at the end of the year but 800$ wont make me rich and it makes life kind of meaningless if I never got to do anything nice for myself over the course of that year... coffee is such a cheap little indulgence in the grand scheme of things

Ironic how gary said how its better to be born poor than rich, yet Gary's father had a successful wine business which gary worked at for years.

Finally it's back and I can finish watching, it really caught me off guard and scared a bit when last upload just stopped playing out of nowhere amidst me watching it. Thanks for an interesting video, mr. RU-vidr! I will enjoy the rest of it in my boxers with a glass of cold orange juice

Imagine being Gary's employee.... *Shudders* 99% of his rhetoric sounds like him trying to convince you that if you just sell your soul to labor every second of your life the universe will reward you. And if his advice doesn't work, all he has to say is that you needed to give up more and it's your fault.

RU-vid self help content is about as helpful as buying dehydrated water: It's a scam, and you fell for it.

lovely video. "I deserve to do things I kinda like" is something most people should say to themselves more often

Mindfulness is a huge help for me however I learned it from my therapist in a way that wasn't just always be happy. Personally the best self help for me is just actively doing things that help improve my life with the least amount of cons or if possible no cons. Such as going to therapy, working out, trying to eat better, drink more water, cut back on drinking alcohol and smoking and I've realized I don't need a guru to do that

I totally agree that the self help channels that try to preach on what EVERYONE must do to be successful or happy are so horrible and could be harmful. everyone is different. I'm someone with major depressive disorder and persistent depressive disorder (yes, there's 2 types), and what helps me depends a lot on which I'm really going through. So even if the advice helps me one time, it doesn't work on me other times. (Mindfullness helps me a lot with anxiety but does NOTHING for my depression). The mindset of hustle culture is so harmful to neuro divergent people. Telling us we won't be happy unless we work 24/7 will most certainly lead to hurt. Breaks are important for every person, even more so for people who have to fight just to wake up in the morning. Thanks for this. I'm glad you're doing well now.

I lost the love of my life back in November, not the same as a breakup, but similar results in a way. I lost who I was when he was alive, I can never go back. One night changed the course of my entire life. Self help stuff hasn't been incredibly helpful, I've found more wisdom and help in my friends and family. The more time I spend with the people who love me and see the good things in me, the better I feel because I start to see what they see in me. My fiance and I were together for almost 9 years total, he was only 28. It's insanely hard to even articulate how hard it's been to adjust to not having my partner and the depth of the loss. It's hard to listen to self help people talk down on everyone else, saying "you're just not trying hard enough". I don't have the energy to be talked down to, honestly.

I really wanna hear from you guys, what are your experiences with self help content? Do you feel like any of this stuff managed to help you or not really? Love you

ohhh so this was the unavailable video on my Watch Later list

I like how you didn’t just argue with the most disturbing statements that some self-help channels make, but got to the heart of how we sometimes use these channels to fuel our bad habits.

If Marie Kondo's work could be considered self-help, then yes. I seriously decluttered my life, and I need to take a pass at doing it again.

for what its worth, those 40 mins of swimming where your brain is only focusing on the single task you're doing IS meditation. clearing your brain of Thoughts and just being in the present moment of what you're doing is all it takes to meditate honestly

hey i recognise that place

“The Minimalists” are the only self help I like as they talk about the opposite of hustle culture, unless it brings you true value. Getting rid of most of my stuff has helped me find out what brings me value and what doesn’t. It’s not really self help in the normal sense it’s more of a way to stop needing self help in the first place. One you are “enough” you don’t seek constant improvement.

I feel your pain on this one. Just got out of a 10.5 year thing. Sucks ass

Ive been watching this channel for over 3 years, and I have to say, I love the direction it’s going. First, thank you Pinely for talking about your struggles with covid. Over the past 2 years, most online figures pretend nothing is going on and it feels like I’m the only person whose life has been completely fucked by covid. Thank you for being genuine. I also can’t believe two of my favorite youtubers, pinely and big joel, have a connection somehow. That is awesome, hoping for a collab (if possible of course :-) )

Life just has been...an experience for everyone and I have to say, your other recent video hit hard. In the way I've been trying to do what I always have done to cope mentally. All of a sudden.. its not cutting it. In the past couple years I went from the most dependable, long-term, full-time, faithful-to-a-fault manager that worked even 75 plus hours a week to moving out of state aaaaand I've had about..8 jobs in the past year and a half alone..I'm just kinda done at this point. My kid is grown, I don't need a big house to call home. I have no plans...I know I sound kinda crackhead-ish. But I've been doing the right thing for so long...dunno if it's even the right thing anymore. Hang in there, everybody. We're all trying to deal and find ourselves and happiness... Hope we do.

For all the grinding and hustling and working nonstop Gary Vee does, he sure has a lot of time to record himself and speak on podcasts.

As someone who wakes up at 2-3 pm any time I can get away with it, I just wanna point out it's not always laziness. I have neurological problems that interfere with my sleep cycle. Also I've heard that some people are naturally predisposed to having weird sleep schedules, because throughout human history it was evolutionarily advantageous for some members of the group to be up at night watching out for danger. Never fact-checked this but it seems logical

I used to work in psychiatry and we would get people who saw the self help message, and even if it didn't fully work, assumed we had some kind of magic bullet answer. Unfortunately, it often takes time and a mixture of many factors to treat mental illness, depending on the unique person/illness - they may need to try different medications, various types of therapy, support from social workers, addiction specialists, occupational therapists etc, join support groups, use their own support network, change personal behaviours & more. We have many tools available and can often transform our patients' lives, but it takes time, and effort, and can involve many different professionals and approaches. The quick fix magic bullet super simplistic approach sometimes makes it harder for patients to accept the reality of the journey we want to go on with them, and they drop out of treatment despite there being a good chance of really helping them. It's super sad when that happens. The same applies if you aren't clinically unwell but are going through a touch spot. Medication and psychotherapy might not be needed (although therapy isn't just for mental illness, and can be hugely helpful for all kinds of people) but there isn't going to be a magic bullet. It takes time, and sometimes you may need to change your behaviour or use simple tools like self-guided CBT, but the most overlooked factor (IMO) is time, and support from loved ones, if possible.

thank you for saying “the privilege of being on the grind”

1:25 it’s a small part of the video but I always appreciate when creators re-establish their boundaries, and try to prevent viewers from forming parasocial relationships

Also self help was something i wanted to achieve after hitting bottom. Ive had depression all my life and struggle with substance abuse and after a lot of self sabatoge and almost losing the person i loved the most, i realized i needed to change. I’m still an alcoholic but i’m no longer hard on myself and i’ve trained my brain to kick a lot of the self depreciation habits/ if theres anything i believe it’s that your brain is the key to everything and if you can rewire it through sheer will, necessity to change, or out of trauma, you absolutely can the human will is completely bizzare but i’m a lot better these days then the man i was simply a year ago. ALSO! THERAPY HELPED IMMENSELY.

My only goal when I started my own business was to work as little as possible. Work smart not hard is a much better idea than the crazy Gary Vee hustle. Life is about creating beautiful memories, not making millions.

Struthless is the bees knees. He’s not pretentious. When the shut down originally the best piece of advice that my dad gave me was to keep learning. Continuing to learn thing and educate myself in various ways. Pinterest of all places was a great place to start. Infographics for days. When it comes down to it, It’s gaining all the tools and using the ones that work for you.

I rarely comment on videos, but I just wanted to say the last part of the video hit me hard. I've been going through the same stuff and kind of just ignoring it. Talking about how the happiness won't last forever means you know the next time you feel bad won't last forever make things seem a little brighter. I don't know if you read all the comments but it's just comforting knowing there's someone else going through the same thing as you.

Wow, I wasn't aware my sleep disorder means I'm predisposed to being rich.

I live every moment of my life in a natural state of conscious awareness due to OCD. While it can sometimes be a boon I find it hinders me more than most would think. A constant state of awareness is a constant state of suffering. There are two sides of every philosophy.

“Have you ever noticed how those who are bad with money can never seem to keep ahold of it?” …Have I ever noticed how people who are bad with money… are bad with money? Like, I get based on context that they’re trying to work backwards and equate *all* people who don’t ever seem to have enough money with people who are irresponsible or sloppy with their funds, despite that obviously not being true, but… that’s just it. They’re doing it backwards.

The Sisyphus55 RU-vid channel that actually deals with a lot of these issues through philosophy. I can't help but think of his channel after watching this video and the short film. Much love pinely

It’s so strange to me that people struggle during self-isolation. As a “super introvert” (which is kind of like a regular introvert but riddled with added social anxiety), anytime I get to lock myself away from the world for a week or two is like finally breathing fresh air after being stuck under a double duvet with an active tear gas grenade.

Sending you love, Mr. RU-vidr! 🧡 Remember that life moves in cycles and is never stagnant… if you’re at the lowest of the low the only direction you can go is high. ✨

As someone whose been in therapy for years and done "self-help", I think the biggest problem with self-help is that there is no one to keep you accountable to actually doing something. Like you said at the end, instead of doing anything a person can get caught up learning about self help! Whereas, my therapist keeps my accountable for whether I have actually done anything to improve whatever problem I'm complaining about. I think a lot of the tools recommended by self help ppl are good (and even my therapist recommends the same) but being accountable to yourself is incredibly hard. I hate how self help crosses over into entrepreneurship and making money though. It should be about mental wellbeing and satisfaction in life, not about how to make money better. Hope you feel better over your breakup soon. I love the divine comedy of you living out your script.

I got ghosted by my girlfriend of several years at the start of the pandemic and I haven't heard from her since. It's been real rough, it gets better

“You’re all a bunch of strangers.” Thanks bro.

Mentioning how swimming helped you was a really great addition, and I think it should be encouraged people find a place like that to clear their heads. When people bring up meditation a lot of people picture the stereotypical sitting criss cross on a yoga mat with their eyes closed for 4 hours with ocean sounds or something playing. This works for some people and if it works for you that's great!! But meditation imo covers a much broader area than people think, I think the way you described swimming is exactly what meditation is supposed to feel like, it's just your way of meditating. For me my strongest meditation strategy is the times I ride as a passenger on my grandpa's motorcycle, it sounds insane to some people but once you're used to riding them driving for hours in rural country roads through just nature in the open air is one of the most grounding things you can imagine, at least for me. A car ride with the window down doesn't even come close, there's just something intensely grounding about those motorcycle rides. I struggle with mental disorders, my thoughts are almost always controlled via OCD, dissociative, paranoid/psychotic and trauma disorders. Day to day I'm constantly dealing with intrusive thoughts and dissociative episodes attacking from different places in my head, it's exhausting. I can't enjoy going on a walk because my hyper vigilance is always at the forefront of my mind, I've walked past stop signs where a car had to stop next to me, and was flooded with adrenaline, I had to resist the urge to run because I thought I was going to be shot. If I'm walking in the woods, and there's any other person, they could've not even seen me and I'd be convinced they were following me. The motorcycle rides somehow erase all of that for a moment, I feel like my head is completely clear, its like taking a breath of fresh air for the first time in months or years. Meditation is seriously so so important, it just takes finding what does it for you! I preach the value of having an outlet for your emotions, I do a LOT of art, but finding a space free from even thinking about negative things is equally vital.

I feel like this is the first time that I can say this and I never usually noticed this, but I quite liked the choice of background music for this video because it helped keep it more interesting rather than depressing

Damn, feeling better in the UK will be challenging. After 7 years in London I'm ready to plan my exit, mental health, burnout, loneliness you name it. Good on you if you really adapt! Not easy.

That cycle of feeling safe in self help being a new procrastinating habit really solidified what I was dealing with when I left college before I graduated.

Oh man I hope you're doing ok :P But also god damn that realisation about being "stuck in your own script". Fucking shivers down my back. I've felt that. It's so cosmic and surreal

Re-upload? What happened Since I watched this video yesterday I've had Gary Vee stuck in my head being annoying AF so yeah thanks for that

As a self-help i used to watch years ago once said: "the act of watching self-help won't solve your problems. its like you're in a war and all you do is stay inside the castle sharpening your sword. You dont need 10 videos on 'how to socialize', you may need some level of guidance, and then go try it, even if it fails, its better than watching self-help all day"

I found out about Alux because a relative began sending me their videos non-stop during the pandemic... He lost his wife, his children's love and respect, and most of his savings because he let his friend of FOUR MONTHS, who just happened to be a labor(?) lawyer who also did divorces, and his own friggin mistress convince him that his wife was cheating on him. So yeah, that's a good hint about what kind of people actually listen to that advice.

out of the 50 million titles you chose for this video "Why self help channels seem to just make you feel worse" is certianly the best one

This is a great video topic. I’ve seen lots of these channels, and they’ve always seemed off to me. Glad to see another upload from you =)

It's kind of funny you say mindfulness isn't for you, then describe your time swimming as nearly the exact definition of mindfulness--that is, existing in the present, experiencing the sensations of the moment, and fully partaking in that experience. Or at least, that's the definition used in DBT. And that's not a bad thing! It just made me chuckle. It has been suggested to me numerous times that I should practice meditation, but I simply can't do it traditionally. The ADHD brain combined with my inability to stop overthinking makes even the idea of 'clearing your head' impossible. What I realized, however, was I could achieve a similar end result by giving my hands something to do while listening to something. I'll often do handicrafts while listening to scary story podcasts or science documentaries because it stops my thoughts from scattering to the wind and keeps me engaged with a physical task. It helps me feel centered, relieves anxiety, and best of all, I get some fun end results. It's not meditation in the traditional way, just like swimming isn't the traditional activity prescribed to achieve mindfulness, but the end result is close enough.

I also love watching Big Joel and being in the Hog Zone, oink. Regarding self help, I think the only 2 channels that have helped me is MuchelleB and The Financial Diet (less so because a lot of the advice is obviously USA focused and I don’t live there). A lot of self help is male dominated and as you said rely on HEY YOU IDIOT, I KNOW BETTER, FOLLOW MY ADVICE. I like when people explain to me why x works or can work. It’s funny you mention minimalism because a few years ago I started watching some channels about it and started feeling really bad for having stuff and not living this elevated minimal lifestyle. I’m glad I realised I was just feeling bad over something I don’t even want to change. I like my knick knacks, I like having colourful art on my walls, I like being able to wear clothes in different styles according to my mood. Capsule wardrobes are at least for now not for me. I think anyone who has struggled with mental health for a relatively long time like I do, it’s so tempting to blame ourselves and try to implement every thing that gets recommended. Even more when you’re a perfectionist. It’s easy to think that there’s an optimal version of ourselves and that we just have to try hard enough to get there. I agree with you that having someone relate to us is a good feeling. I was diagnosed as an adult with ADHD and have noticed that there’s some self help “rules” that I actually benefit from avoiding. We’re not supposed to buy things for self help but what if having a pair of scissors and a step to reach high things I’m every room smoothes thing over? Watching the channel How to ADHD and hearing Jessica say things that work for her allowed me to try things out. routines are SO ESSENTIAL, HERE ARE 50 STEPS, but as much as I like chilling on the couch with a nice mug of tea and my cat, that makes leaving the house harder. Sorry for my rambles, it’s an area I think a lot about.

Damn bro, that's all very intense of what you've been through. You mention that none of us know you, and that's true, but as one creator to another I commend you for keeping up the good fight and all. Don't keep bad for taking a break, you're fuckin killing it and your stuff is great! :)

People who spend their young life on the “grind” end up depressed by 60 wishing they enjoyed being young

Ive watched the video yet so i don't know if you mentioned it, but self help is very often an entrance to the world of pseudoscience and conspiracies. Of coursenot everyone will fall in that rabbit hole but it happen so often?

That Alux channel, Jesus. I came across it once. Totally evil vibe indeed.

Nice to hear another side of the “hustle mentality”. Thank you Pinely :D

This reminds me of when I was 16 and going through horrible depression and my dad's way to deal with that was to buy me a bunch of self-help books for my birthday (instead of, you know, going to a therapist's) and after reading through about 5 pages of one of them I was like "hahaha no thank you"

I’ll be your friend

Yes my mom who works three jobs is the laziest person i know…She can’t even sleep because of stress ffs. I can’t stand channels like these. 🙃

It’s so gross when they talk about poor people not having money because they don’t work for it. A lot of “poor” people work full-time and have part-time work on top of that, and they still have to decide which bills get paid on time. The main issue isn’t “$4 coffee;” the main issue is that their jobs don’t pay a living wage even when they have two or three of them.

what really helps me: continuing to age and gain more experiences, meet more people, hear more stories. love ya pinely

great vid pinely as someone with d3pr3ss10n, anxiety and ocd as well as other issues i really h@t3 these bs "self help" channels, and alux f them as a poor person everything they say is wrong.

Oh by the way I hope you feel better by the day man. Thanks for sharing and I really hope you continue to find things that do work. Music always seems like a corny IDEA but the right music can do more in the short term (for me) than anything

One of those self "help" clowns should fund a study where they have to pay for personnel (plus expenses like groceries) for a thousand poor families for at least three years and see whether they magically become super rich.

I am incredibly excited for the short film, it sounds really cool

The end segment where you talked about not feeling happy forever but also that means feeling bad won’t last forever-that hits close to home. It’s something I’ve been working toward understanding and using to my advantage to cultivate a more fulfilling life. I don’t like the concept of “happy”, that it’s the mood or state of mind we are all aspiring to be in. The truth is all emotions and feelings and moods are fleeting, ephemeral moments. Good and bad. We can aspire to moments of joy though and take solace in knowing there’s a way out on the other side of the bad days and feelings.

Thanks to pinely's self help channel, I know that watching all of the channel awesome anniversary videos in a row is a good idea

I’m just now finding your channel and obviously I’m so late to this video but I’m so sorry you went through such a rough time here. I 100% feel you with the covid isolations, I had to be quarantined 4x in a row too while I was a full time student and fuck yeah it was worse and worse each time, and during the last time my dog died so you bet I lost my mind for a bit - having the ability to see your current videos while working backwards I’m fr so glad that you found your rhythm again, you obviously care about putting in the work to develop your career and it shows in your content! Even though I don’t know you I’m proud of you, much love 🫶🏼

Just found your channel and I’m obsessed 😍 I know what I’m doing the rest of the day now, binging tf out of your channel

I'm proud of you. You've gone through so much pain but you're still here. Keep going. I believe in you and am supporting you 100%.

the alux voiceover person sounds like an evil rich woman from an anime

“Poor people don’t shower as often as rich people do” Bro I shower 2-3 times per day and I still live in my mommy’s spare room

The problem with self help channels is that often times they are advising you to put a bandaid on a bullet wound most of the people consuming self help media don’t need the newest self help book they need a psychiatrist and a therapist. Its a very predatory industry that literal profits off of not actually helping you so you can buy more books

You aren’t an idiot, you are an extremely intelligent man. Watching creators like you, Big Joel, and the entire lot is my form of self help. I Ive never come to the end one of your videos without learning something or gaining a new perspective, which makes me a more well rounded person. Thank you for all the hard work you put into these videos.

I love the grindset argument of not spending on small things like coffee. I am the person they're talking about who never buys random stuff like that, only eat unprocessed food that I make myself instead of take out food and I don't really spend much in general. guess who isn't a gazillionaire by age 23.

Hey Pinely, I think it's one of your best videos and I really like the more serious stuff you've been doing recently. (Also it should be a real crime to be so good-looking). Wish you all the orange juice in the world and hope you feel better soon!

How to be successful: -Steal flowers -swallow gum -don't sleep

People be like Boot-lick, your employers might raise your pay. And then in the same breath say unions steal your pay. Completely ignoring who fought and died for them to be able to work 8 hour shifts 5 days a week.

I did a 10 day Vipassana a few years ago and it really did feel like the longest and most emotional thing ever, if not just for the fact that it brought attention to how much my brain craves constant, mindless stimulation and it made me feel stupid and mad at myself. My bf at the time asked me to go and I was still pretty young, and I think if I had known how uncomfortable it would be I wouldn’t have even gone. I have adhd so maybe my experience was different than others, but I felt pretty proud of myself for making it to the end and have yet to return, probably because I know now and it’s not just another new experience to look forward to. It was an experience I’m very grateful for but if someone asked me my feedback I’d be honest and tell them it sucked in the moment with delayed gratification. But hearing people romanticize things that are actually hard just because they accomplished it and want to feel like better people than they are just makes others like myself feel like I’m doing a bad job at human-ing and it’s not motivating.

15 Things Poor People Do That Rich People Don't: 1. Realize that GME is heavily shorted by Wall Street oligarchs and pump their stimmy into it to trigger a short squeeze. 2. Laugh as the rich people cry. 3. I ran out of things to list.

I really appreciate this video and I'm really glad you talked about alternative self-help, because I feel like I've fallen into that inspoporn trap so many times. I think I'm always scared to do things, and more important than that, I'm always scared when I do things it will only last 1-2 weeks, as will the feeling of achievement and happiness I get from doing whatever that is. Honestly, I don't have an answer, and I know its okay not to, but it still feels bad ya know? I really liked what you said in the end, that while you're feeling good right now, you know it won't last forever but neither will the next sad period, and it felt good to hear that. I really like watching your videos and I like how much thought you put into what you make and what you say, and I like how different this video was in particular, it was like a little check-in, and kind of helped me do some mental inventory myself.

I feel self help tips are the same as tips on how to deal with mental health, any content made about the topic should be framed as your personal experience with it and not legitimate advice. Make sure to tell the audience that it helped you but may not be helpful for everyone. The problem with most self help stuff is they frame it as “ this WILL help you!” Instead “ maybe try this it may help you” and that’s very disingenuous.

The idea that money doesn't like or "flees" people who don't earn or grind for it or that all rich people are hard-working and absolutely none of them are lazy or irresponsible is just so out of touch. I mean.... have you SEEN rich people?!

My story is very similar but The Grind period didn't last long at all. Was in a relationship for 11 years and had it finally end right after the loss of my cat (which is a huge deal to me because she was basically our daughter). I'm already a broken person by default (dysthymia +3 personality disorders) so it was a huge spiral into darkness (beyond the usual) and heavy exacerbation of any and all insecurities I ever had. As per usual even mentioning a bit of it online means getting bombarded with every parroted talking point of every self help guru. In my case it came with a healthy dose of misandry (both towards me and in recommendations) in the form of this overarching narrative that I am basically worthless outside of how capable I am of The Grind ™/what I bring to the table in terms of money, competence, usefulness. It basically was reinforcing all the toxic shit I grew up with to make me develop dysthymia in the first place. Didn't help that I entered poverty around that time with no idea of the surrounding support networks I could make use of. So instead of doing whatever the fuck these self-hating gurus were telling me to do, I internalized those narratives that I am completely worthless now because I bring nothing to the table and the only sucker that was stupid enough to still be with me besides this is gone now so... i guess just go full incel and Lay Down and Rot. What followed was yet another bout of acute suicidal ideation and depression as well as some bizarre behaviors that stuck (I compulsively joker laugh now anytime too many emotions well up). Of course corona didn't help cause it stripped me of any chance of that getting proven wrong by going outside and getting validated that those internal narratives are stupid so things just kept getting worse and worse. To any dumbass willing to read my rambling, there's no happy ending here. The self help shit faded out (I did some working out and fetishizing learning new skills and being handy but that died fast after the depression made my bed into a holy pit of despair that I must pray to at all times) but the scars and internalized toxic narratives stayed and everything is just worse now. My days are made of schedules to keep me busy and productive as a way to keep my head busy so I don't make myself into a fun piñata. If I think objectively I have been working on myself a ton; picked up woodworking, currently learning 3D design, forcing myself to develop social skills and talk to people, actually went to a dance party for the first time in my life, etc. but none of it is registering on an emotional level because of how broken and insecure I am. At this rate I don't even know where that hole is anymore, maybe it's a need for a stable relationship or maybe it's just a desire for a healthy sex life (or rather the validation of feeling like I'm not completely undesirable and worthless). Either way I'm still waiting for waiting list upon waiting list for my fourth round of therapy to begin (Been to 3 clinics and about 11 flavors of brain-pokers) and I'm just...not doing well to the point where the concept of doing well is alien to me.