The end of that is wanting a hug. The end of all that adrenaline and conquering only leaves you empty if life doesn't give you perceivable rewards. only with God's love is the way to make the void warm enough( hot even ) to push on. If you let him in the lonely nights are still lonely, only less so when you know at least you've got him. Cause it could always be worse. Please find reasons to be happy always despite it all. It's the only way winning happens. Mental perseverance is in Gods hands. Just pray you can handle it all. If you can't kneel and cry in your corner. Give yourself your own tears, at least. It's growth. It's life. Don't let the world know your tears, but don't let them leave you either. In dark days and peak twilight, the warmth of accepting your sorrow will alow you eclipse the pain and transcend the world. Simply because you validated yourself, truly, and you know God is right there right beside you, shilding you, in the muck from inconceivable muck and waste.
