Larger, public social media groups usually handle minors well in my opinion as a minor in lolita and j-fashion in general. The discussions and advice are usually mature when there is possible minors. I've seen many possible minors just absorbing most of the advice and coords to develop their style and they go on to become great members of comms. Personal groups are up to the leaders and members discretion. Honestly, the points addressed for lacemarket and selling lolita shocked me. I've never heard of many scammers especially multiple minors and I've scoured the internet for hundreds of hours on secondhand advice. I found lists of scammers, plenty of milanoo drama, a few very old stories from influencers of their friends being toxic as minors, and of course the cookie jewelry drama. Lacemarket shouldn't be too big of a concern with how many reviews most sellers and buyers have. I've been a buyer for two transactions on lacemarket over my 6 months as a lolita and clear communication prevented any mishaps. I've posted a few times and developed my style through almost a thousand hours of research and art of me in coords. I hope lolita irl communities stay slightly open minded to minors because I'd love to go to pre-planned and welll negotiated swap meets. I found this video because I was looking for specific examples of swap meets. Hopefully, after covid I'll be able to go to a swap meet and trade some art and j-fashion items I don't use anymore but idk. I know most minors aren't near my maturity because I've been raised by very respectful parents who taught me about finances and manners from a very young age(they also forced me to swim as an infant. I'm a great swimmer now but I have swimming. Most of my teenage drama is blaming my parents for my disabilities and being secretly angsty about my hatred for Christianity. But most gen z kids I know can force themselves to be mature when interacting with adults even if they're very dramatic or silly the rest of the time. Some of y'all centennials, millennials, gen xers don't realize how toxic your school life was compared to now. Anyways moral is communicate intentions beforehand and go to therapy if ya are overwhelmed with issues
Sorry if this is tmi or incomprehensible. I haven't slept in 2+ days. That's probs the biggest general flaw of gen z; our total lack sleep hygiene and self regulation.
I honestly think it depends on how mature and well supported they are. If a minor has a friend or family member who is also a lolita, perhaps they will receive help, guidance and supervision from the older friend/family member. Or, if the parents are supportive but aren't lolita's themselves, that could make a world of difference as well. I think minors can wear the fashion, but they may not be able to go to big meet ups or tea parties until later. I think minors can wear it to conventions with friends until they are old enough to go to a bigger event. I think people 16 and up should be mature enough to maybe join meetups/ a comm because they can drive, work, have a debit card etc. But under 16 might be pushing it in regard to joining big events/meetups. Lolita fashion is for everyone, but not everyone is ready to wear it. I discovered lolita when I was 13 and it took me until I was 18/19 to afford it. Minors have their lives ahead of them and could also probably wait until they are old enough to save money for the fashion and handle themselves in mature situations. Lol it's complicated!
Of course they should be able to wear what ever they want! Nothing should be gate-kept thats like that. PLUS it’s a style that is the majority of the community says is for them and for them nottt to be sexualized!!
Also, I’m just starting to get into the fashion, but I’m 19 and my finances aren’t the best- but why are off brand Lolita costumes so bad and not allowed at meets like you said? As long as they like it still and it looks like the style? I just haven’t heard why “on brand” matters so much, just that the quality does. Which I don’t understand if it’s all they can afford and still feel good and pretty in and meets the ‘look’.
I'm a Minor beginner in Lolita fashion, I'm not super active in the communauty and I usually speak to compliment someone or ask somes ouftit questions/advices. I'm not confortable in going to meetup because I know I don't have the necessary Knowledge to not make mistakes while talking to more experienced lolita and I might be annoying to them because I'm kind of a newbie / a noob. As well I'm not buying high brands like BSB or AP, I'm usually saving money to buy tabao brands because they are more affordable. Which makes me not qualified or legit to go to meetup with Indies brands. In My opinion, you're right in many point because for us, adolescent, It might be hard accepting that we are not right or not respecting lolita rules. I think as well that it might be hard to socialise with adults that maybe are longer in lolita fashion and knows things we never heard of,that can make us feel incomfortable and sad or making us disguted of the "dream" Vision we've had of meetup because we're not mature enough to understand all the rules, code and things being a lolita is. Being a part of the lolita community while being minor may cause trouble because we're more exposed to rude lolitas, pedophile, criticism and fetishist. I think we shouldn't be forbidden to be a part of the community but just being less tolerant to minors that are not enough mature or that don't try searching informations by themselve. Thank you for this video, send U love ❤❤
I just want to let you know, you don't need to own BtSSB or AaTP or AP in order to be a "real" lolita. Those are the most popular brands, sure, but tons and tons of lolitas wear Taobao brands to meets. Heck, I think I've worn a brand dress one single time to a meet, and all the other times, I wore cheaper Taobao brands. Everyone has different brand preferences and financial stability, so no one minds too much if you're wearing an indie brand as long as you're following the rules and it's a lolita dress. I did notice that, even at 20, it's awkward for me to go to meets because I'm still the youngest by a long shot, so I can really understand how that feels. It can be really uncomfortable when everyone around you is your senior and has more experience. Maybe it would be beneficial to have more age inclusive meet ups then? Choose locations that are easily accessible for those who don't have cars, aren't too expensive, and activities that would be fun for all ages?
@@BeguruTeam Thank you for all your advice! I always thought it was really bad not wearing high brand at a meeting! Good luck for finding people younger than you at meeting aha, it's surprising because 20 isn't a really young age when it come to social gathering.. Hope someday someone younger will come so you won't be the youngest! I'm going to see if there's no meeting with younger people around where I'm living, thank you so much!!! ❤
I am a minor in lolita. I am very sure I want this and I have done a lot of research (i think i started exploring the fashion end 2019?). I am supported by my family and friends. I really love the fashion and community. I'm not attending meetups just yet, maybe when I'm a bit older (16 or up). Lolita fashion really lowers my anxiety level and makes me feel like me. Thank you for addressing this, because it is a topic I needed to hear about.
Minors are more then welcome to be in the fashion and enjoy it. I was 16 when I first got into it. But, I am firm in the idea that people under 18 shouldn't go to meetups because I don't want to be responsible for them.( i didn't go to meetups till I was 19) I go to a meetup to hang out and have fun not make sure the minors aren't getting into trouble. Not to mention all the issues we had in the past on tumblr with perverts stealing minor photos. And tbh , doesn't anyone find it creepy that minors are hanging out with a bunch of people in their 20's.
I’m 15 and I’ve been dressing in lolita clothes for a few months now because it brings me a lot of joy and it’s a style that makes me feel comfortable. I was kind of confused when I first saw this video because I had no idea that there were lolita communities and meet ups. I just thought it was only a type of fashion, so I was like “wait do I need some sort of pass to dress up??” lol. But I definitely agree with a lot of the points in this video. I would feel so bad if my parents dropped me off at a meet up and it was a bunch of adults.
@@BeguruTeam ok good because i just started getting into the lolita fashion and was concerned if i would be able to still enjoy the fashion given that I'm a minor
Okay but like why are parents dropping off their kids at events that aren't FOR kids?? Like a 16, 17 year old is one thing but much younger than that and idk why parents would even do that. At least stay with your kid lol. I'm not in the lolita world so I can't really speak too much, but in general I think it is great to encourage young people to start embracing their passions! They get told enough that they can't or shouldn't do XYZ... they don't need to hear it from people within the community they are interested in, too. Maybe groups could have adult-only and all-ages meetup options so individuals could decide for themselves?
I've actually seen a few 21+ plus meet ups, where people get together and drink or have an adult game night, which I think is pretty cool. I'm 20, so I haven't been able to go to any yet, but I've definitely seen them around. However, I don't think I've seen any that are for 18+, now that I think about it
I think it’s fine for minors to dress in Lolita if they really like the fashion but I don’t personally think they should be going to meet ups especially when there’s way older adults there and like you said some people see Lolita as a kink
I am a minor and I am not very interested in joining meetups I just wanna dress up in private or for my friends! Since of my low self confidence, and I think it’s rude for me to go to a meet up since I’m young and I don’t want people babysitting me.
I am naturally biased being teen lolita, but I think that as long as you are able to afford it, It's fine (preferably buy them yourself, But some families have no problems buying full coords). I think the last point is the most valid point even for older teenagers, and that's why I still have yet to actually go to a meetup. I know that it will probably really awkward for my local comm to interact with a teenager when they are all adults, maturity differences don't just go away because you have a job and car and it's respectful to be aware that not all adults want to talk to teenagers as peers.
i’m a 16 year old cancer patient, and i’ve been interest in lolita fashion for a few years… ultimately, my makeawish ended up being to get a huge lolita haul from BTSSB!! i have been researching it for months in advance to make sure i do things as correctly as i can as a first time lolita, but this might be one of the most helpful things i’ve come across since its not something people talk about. i’m very glad this video came onto my feed because i want to learn about fitting in better into the community, too. (exciting side note, tomorrow is finally the day i get to try on all of my new clothes! they are gonna take me away in a limo to a boutique where all of the clothes have been ironed and prepared for me to try on. i’m so excited, i’ve been waiting for quite some time… thanks cancer hehe! xD)
I was 15 when I started in lolita, and I really feel like it’s situational. Some 13-17 year olds can handle themselves really well and understand how to keep themselves safe, and others cannot. I was fine at 15 but not everyone carries themselves the same way at age 15 so- I really believe it’s situational and it depends on the comm.
i''m a minor and i'm starting out in lolita. personally, i think minors should be allowed to wear lolita fashion and be apart of the community if they are mature and responsible. and also over 14 because usually kids 13 and under and really immature and generally are more prone to buying lolita on wish and all of those other scam sites (trust me, when i was 13 my friends and i looked for lolita stuff on wish and aliexpress because we didnt know any better) btw this was a really well made video, good job
As somebody under 14 that is an invalid argument. I am not denying the fact some >13 are immature but children shouldn't stopped for a way to dress. Of course if you are under 13 you may get scammed but I am only 12 and have been doing lolita since I was 10 and I have never been scammed I understand what to do. Of course there is others who are immature. I may not support the meetup situation though. I don't think >13 under should go to meetup unless they are with a responsible gaurdian or ect. This is personal opinions and I respect your thoughts.
@@alexav4329 thank you so much! what i meant is that generally kids under 14 are more immature and arent really the type to be dedicated to such an expensive fashion such as lolita and are less likely to fully educate themselves. im glad to hear that you're educated on the fashion and understand how to not get scammed. i wish you luck on your egl journey!! :)
@@alexav4329 that’s really cool that you have worn lolita since you were ten cause I’m ten and starting in the fashion! How did you get the dresses though cause size and stuff?
@@Francescosplays I don't do it professionally but I usually just google lolita clothing website and for sizing it is pretty simple, You can find whats closest to your measurements!
This is so simple: make it like festivals. Some festivals are strictly 18+, while others are 21+. Meetups should be this way, depending on what the activities will include and the preferences of the host. Someone under 18/21 can host an under 18/21 meetup and bar adults from joining as well. Fashion is for everyone.
Huh, I guess I can see now of 50/50 balance on why minors should or should not be allowed. I'm actually really glad I didn't find interest of Lolita when I was a kid. And I'm sure this would be great advice for people who want to try Lolita. P.s. I hope who was watching didn't cause any trouble.
I think it’s fine for minors to be into lolita fashion. I think for meetups there should be a rule system for the safety of the child and for older lolitas to avoid the whole “babysitting” factor. I feel like if a minor is under 14 they should have an adult who attends with them. I feel as though 14+ is fine to go to events without having to be “babysat” by older lolitas (though it would be great for them to be safe and have someone looking out for them, but I don’t think an older lolita would have to feel as though they are actually babysitting when the minor is older and not obnoxious.) I just feel like allowing minors to be in a niche hobby that is inclusive and nice and supportive, it’s a good thing. I got into lolita at 14 (I never owned brand but I owned bodyline) and I’m so happy that I got into it! I never went to a big meetup, but I got into the online community a bit and it definitely made me feel a lot better to know I wasn’t alone in the fashion. I’m from an area where it’s not really easy to find others interested in any niche hobbies, so it was really great to find a community where I fit in.
Im about to be 14 and hopefully for my birthday I might get a lolita dress. Im a total noob and Im honestly really scared to join the community. I don't think I will go to any meetups because im young and im not that educated about the rules, costumes, and history of the fashion. But Im hoping when Im older I will be able to join meet ups and talk to people about the fashion. Anyways, the point is reading this comment really helped me calm down my nerves. Just knowing you were 14 when you got into lolita makes me feel better. :)
@@heyo8228 I'm so happy that it could be helpful for you! :) Honestly getting into any community is always a learning experience. So, no one expects you to be an expert in the fashion right off the bat! I am STILL learning things about the fashion and I'm almost 22! I took a break from it since I was 14 and came back off and on but I would really recommend looking into any local communities you have near you. Even if you do not attend meet ups (all are online right now anyways so it could be easier for you at this time) - you can still read the forums, chat about the clothing and learn from your peers! I would say most local communities are very accepting and understanding, even more chill that bigger FB groups like Big sisters of lolita (not that theyre bad but I can see how newbies could see it as intimidating). Anyways, I wish you well on your lolita journey ! :) Also happy early birthday!
I first found out about lolita fashion when I was 11 and stumbled over angelic pretty accidentally. However, I only started wearing the fashion 5 years later because my parents didn't let me get into it when I first found it - which I totally understand now. I showed them cheap ita Google images dresses to convince them with the price. Luckily it didn't work. Today I am so thankful for them. I honestly fail to understand why any parent would let a child below 13 wear such a specific fashion (alone all by itself). It is veeery hard for such a young kid to differentiate between the real deal and knock offs. And I'm not even talking about brands but about other people. Late-teen wearers of the fashion mostly realize when a creep is approaching, but how would a child know? Especially because some people see lolita as a part of their fetish (sadly) I think it's just a dangerous situation, especially for a child, to be in. If a child doesn't have careful parents who just let it buy any Lolita cosplay sexy aliexpress dress just because it's cheap and the kid doesn't yet know how to research or doesn't speak the language of most forums (like me back then) and the wrong pedophile sees the kid in a sexy cosplay dress - I don't even want to imagine that stuff like this could happen.
it would be cool if there were brands and meetups specifically for minors so we wouldn't have to worry about a lot of this stuff. Kids should be able to express themselves and follow their passions, but with the amount of problems it can cause in adult communities it can be a bit complicated. Another issue is that some adults don't know how to adult and really WILL go after a 13 year old because they're wearing a bodyline print or cat ears or the colors in their coord aren't matching up perfectly. They don't stop to think about what they were doing as kids and how they would've taken it, and it ends up scaring a lot of people off that may have otherwise been valuable to the community. There's no excuse in throwing a fit over genuine constructive criticism, but there is something to be said about elitists that never matured past middle school and think it's ok to rip into a literal child for not owning any angelic pretty right away as if they never had a "cringy" or "ita" phase themselves.
My personal opinion is that minors shouldn't be discriminated and stopped for doing things. It's all just fashion. As long as the minor (more specifically >15) doesn't wear something scandalous.
i gotta say i kinda hate the term "minor" in some of these debates? i recently turned 17 and ive been interested in lolita fashion and the community since i was like,, 11 i think? but me turning 18 is not going to be a magical wand that grants me the maturity and mental health that i supposedly dont have just bc im not 18
I'm a minor and I think as long as all the adults confirm they're ok with minors attending it's ok HOWEVER I believe, only 16-17+. You're almost an adult then and that should be the very youngest.
clothes is a big part of my personality and im a minor myself, i get very stressed from events so it wouldnt be any harm if i just dressed in the fashion?
Ultimately do whatever is going to make you personally feel the most comfortable and happy. If you want to wear lolita and have done your research on the fashion, then absolutely go for it
As a minor, i dont and never will go to meet ups by myself, not only to be more safe, it's another way to bond even more, im not in any online lolita fashion community's currently but if i do i would just chat somewhere my parents could see
There needs to be someone who is safeguard trained/has been DBS/FBI checked at all meets/in chats so that if there is an escalation, that person knows how best to handle the situation. I work in student wellbeing, and specifically under 18s. It's really important that those running meets that have minors present know that they have a responsibility for them. You have to monitor what is said in chats. You need to be aware of where the meets will be held (such as 18+ venues, like a boozy afternoon tea, or a meet that the minor cannot be unattended- such as at a mall, when doing certain travel, watching certain films, playing certain games, etc.). You also will need to make a risk assessment (RA) to ensure that should an emergency occurr, you evaluted the situation ahead of time, you knew the risks, and you can present this should the designated guardian decide to sue. My view is that minors should be allowed in the fashion (it's a way for them to express themselves and find the joy we, as adults, have- many find their passions during their teens), but a designated guardian should be present in the event of an emergency or poor behaviour. From the perspective of someone who does this for a living, this is mainly because the fashion is my escape, so always leading as the enhanced DBS checked indiviudal and DSO -designated safeguarding officer- doesn't allow me to have a break from my job. I love my job and the awesome students I work with, but sometimes it's nice to step away from it, have a boozy afternoon tea, and curse like a sailor. XDDD. Obviously, for larger meets, you'll need the RA, anyway, to give to the venue, but you still need to be aware of minor-to-responsible adult ratios (an average recommendation of 10:1). Edit, grammar.
Coming from a minor, I feel like minors SHOULD be allowed to do lolita. Go to meetups/tea parties? Maybe, it depends on how mature they are. Be a lolita in general? *Definitely.* Lolita wouldn't even get it's concept if it weren't for minors. Not only that, but because of lolita fashion (specifically sweet lolita) it's gonna attract minors like me. That's like being a company, stealing someone's traits and making it into a style, but when they ask to wear the style you stole from them you try your best to keep them away from it.
I’m pretty late- My answer on this videos idea. Is that I think that minors could and should be allowed to do Lolita, From what I know Lolita is a fashion that is pretty “conservative” so minors aren’t showing off too much of their skin, I do agree that 13 and up is a good range. Also I don’t know if it’s just me but I do cosplay. Most of my cosplays don’t show too much skin, and I’m very interested in Lolita fashion. As a minor i can say I don’t have a lot of cosplay friends, and joining Lolita can be like getting your friend into one of your favorite fandoms. All of your points for both sides of not and being allowed to join Lolita are very good reasons. I’m very in-between on this topic so correct me if I’m wrong. I’m not fully educated on Lolita fashion. Great video Lanie! Keep up the good work!
Personally, as Lolita is designed to be an inclusive community, I think they should be allowed in. I agree that nobody under 18 should go to meetups, however.
Well, I do believe that miners should be able to be in the community but- they need to completely understand what they’re getting them self’s into. Do research, LOTS of noting and just making sure they know the rules and basics before diving into a community like Lolita. They also need to fully understand that no community is perfect...there are gonna be some disrespectful people anywhere you go, and be able prepare themselves to handle that properly. As well as know the difference between conservative criticism and insults- I feel if a minor prepares themselves accordingly then they should be do great in the community. ANYWAYS RANT OVER- a video covering this topic would be great, it would inform minor and people who are interested in Lolita about the negative aspects that aren’t talked about much. HAVE AN AMAZING DAYY!
I started wearing lolita when I was 13, but now im almost 23 and dont know if I ever want to go to a meetup with the massive ammount of social anxiety and such I have lol. I am very luck, I would always ask for stuff either from bodyline and eventually closetchild for christmas and birthdays so that is how I was able to build up my wardrobe. An important thing to note about me though is I am autistic, and for me that meant even the barbie dolls I got in preschool still look almost like when it did in the box, but I know there are a lot of 13 year olds would probably be destructive to the clothing, so I think it depends for that. It is also interesting you mentioned the creepy guys sexualizing lolita because although I have faced that in adulthood unfortunately, Originally i started wearing lolita (and vintage fashion) partially due to creepy coments I got even from girls in my middleschool class when I wore jeans.
That's awesome your mom is so supportive of you! Ultimately, it is your decision on what you want and don't want to wear. Do what is going to make you the most comfortable and happy. Have you already started wearing the fashion or are you just looking into it for now?
This can be mean but: kids below 17 shouldn't be allowed in the community. They can wear lolita if they want to but community should be reserved for adults and older teens. I was in many communities before lolita and allowing minors never ends good, from one side you have annoying kids being brats a lot of times and from other overprotective people who acts like your responsibility is to babysit someone's child because "you're an adult and they're just a kid", both groups creates drama that pollutes the community they're in. I also don't buy excuses that some kids are "mature" one because that's an excuse with pretty problematic implications and two because if you remember yourself in age of 14 there's no way you will call yourself mature even if you did that back then, kids are kids even if some of them are calmer they can still create massive problems. There are kids spaces and adult spaces not without a reason, there's just no way those two groups can co-exists together very closely if they're not related, you can't really talk to a child like to an adult, you won't became friends with a kid same way as with adult but from other side kids will never see you as equal to them, will never know how to talk to you and where are certain boundaries etc etc. as much as everyone would want you can't really create all ages friendly space, someone will fell excluded because age is such a unique trait you can't really see it same way as race, size or gender when you talk about exclusivity.
As a minor who is really interested in lolita but doesn’t wear it yet and hopes to soon but as of right now I wouldn’t really want to go to meetups or join Facebook groups I just kinda wanna wear it
I’ve mostly been a lonelita so I can’t say I care what comms do most of the time, since I’m not in one. As I get older, I find myself not wanting to be around minors, because the gap between them and myself (obviously) increases a lot with time. I just make my own friends within the fashion and live a happy lonelita life, not having to worry about comm drama (parasol papers notwithstanding). When I was younger (18-20) I was sort of interested in meetups and whatnot but nowadays I’m solo with some good friends.
I think there's a place for minors in the community. Both online and irl/meet ups. I think it's a problem when their parents just drop them off at meetings without asking the other attending members about it beforehand. When there's a minor at the meet up unannounced it's really normal for the adults there to feel uncomfortable being responsible for the minor without being asked first. And you often can't really relax in the same way, because you're in caretaker mode (babysitter sounds a bit harsh) instead of socializing in a group of adults only. There's a french lolita whose mother goes with her to meetups (also dressed in lolita) and that really seems to be the best option here imo. Back in the early 2000's it would probably have been unlikely for the under 16's to buy enough lolita items to make more than 2 outfits, but lately with the existence of low budget brands (bodyline or from taobao, dresses in the 35-60$ category) and lacemarket this sounds like it could be possible. I know bodyline existed back then as well, but it was much more stigmatized than it is now. And if that was your only option you might not have been so keen to attent meetups.
@@kawaiimagicalex5170 I agree, which is why if minors are going to be there I want them to either take a parent or adult friend with them, or at least notify the group before the meetup so I can choose not to attend.
I'm 16 and interested in Lolita, Ouji, J and alternative fashion in general. I got a lot of info with the vid. I agree with most of what you said personally. I don't plan on going to meets until I'm 18 for personal and safety reasons but I'm still planning on getting at least one coord in my life.
Personally I think they should. The whole thing with Lolita is expressing yourself ,it would just be excluding someone because of their age. It’s just not allowing someone to do it. As long as they are responsible with the things they wear, and they are being watched over when they are under 15. Of course if they are under 13 it’s not much of a good idea.
I was a part of the historical partner dancing community long before i joined lolita, and i think there were a lot of similar conversations there too. How do we welcome minors while at the same time keeping them safe and honoring adult spaces? I think the most important thing is clarity! All events, adult or otherwise, should clearly state if they are all ages or not. In my opinion, lolita fashion should be open to all, regardless of age, but this doesn't mean every lolita *event* has to be open to all ages. I think it would be great to host some lolita meetups or workshops specifically for kids and teens who are interested in the fashion. This would be a great opportunity for minors to meet other kids who are interested in lolita, and learn more about the fashion in a safe social environment. The parameters of such events could always include the things mentioned, such as requiring young participants to be accompanied by an adult, and having their own mode of transportation. I think having the meetup moderated by adults could also cut down on drama etc. And not being able to buy brand should NEVER be a barrier for entering the fashion, when there are so many other ways to upcycles and sew your own lolita projects. Overall, i believe young people have incredible creativity and imagination. It's worth making some safe spaces for them :)
Of course they should be able to wear what ever they want! Nothing should be gate-kept thats like that. PLUS it’s a style that is the majority of the community says is for them and for them nottt to be sexualized!!
Anyone can enjoy a fashion or aesthetic no matter the age but there is a level of expectations that come with it. For example a kid can wear lolita as the fashion is made to be a statement but they should understand going to events shouldn't be allowed unless they have an adult with them. Kids need to express their creativity or they will be seriously stunted, and it's important for us as members to have a safe space for anyone to be included BUT that does not mean we are their babysitter nor does it make us responsible for their actions. I also understand some people do post more adult content so it is completely okay to have specifically 21+ only events/online discussions where children aren't allowed. This fashion is one that expresses so much creativity it deserves to be shared with everyone♡
I agree with your opinion, and actually I am just getting into Lolita, I’m only buying some little things so I can get used to wearing stuff like that, I don’t want to go all out in the beginning cause that could make me to self conscious, because I already have anxiety. just bought a blouse, and a skirt, I bought a dress as well, Mary Jan shoes, some accessories, and I already have a lot at home that can go with it. Even though I’m not trying to buy something big or like super out there, cause Lolita is already out there, and expensive even if you find deals, it can be hard.
I’m 12 trying to get into lolita fashion. I think I’m pretty mature for my age. It’s a little difficult to buy dresses because I’m not allowed to shop anywhere my parents don’t know. I won’t be attending any meetups because I can see how that would be encredibly awkward for me and everyone there. Unfortunately before I found much about replicas I bought (the dress) off Amazon😅. I’ll figure out away to buy from bodyline soon because it seems pretty affordable to me! Edit: I can’t seemTo buy off body line but still trying 🥲 Edit: 10 months later and I’m trying to get back into the fashion
I love EGL! I go to conventions and even in public and to school in some forms of Lolita! I’m 12 and I’ve been interested in it since I was 7. Love it love love it. Personally I believe it’s no more sexual than the girls my age who wear half shirts and leggings. It’s very hard for people to not take us seriously at gathering because we are kids, or even in public because of our egl. I have brand name (mostly Alice and the pirates) I tend to buy second hand and thrift fashion. have a best friend who goes with me and we also take etiquette classes just for Lolita. Live laugh live Lolita forever!!!!!
I know that I've seen a lot of things for the year in Japan where there are younger children wearing Lolita I think it is something that they teach the children over there all about the fashion and how to wear it if it wasn't for the older generation teaching them all about it they wouldn't know what styles to pick and how to wear it but I do agree that teenager should be left alone with out their parents because it's unfair to people that have to end up looking after someone
Im just 14 in some months 15 but Im thinking of joining the Lolita Fashion community because I feel so inspired by the styles ! I may not be able to go to conventions until I’m 16-17 though because I would like to have my drive license first but I may join for around my 15 bday buying my first dress ^^
I personally wouldn't want to deal with minors in meets for several reasons but I feel like to say that they cant come to meets are too harsh because they deserve to have to have a space to share a passion. I feel like don't want to be responsible for someone's kid mostly.
When I started I just wanted to wear it I didn't want to go to meet ups.Also I'm a minor and I don't want to cause drama I think I'm chill lol. I go to school so there's no creepy men I have to worry about and I go out with my parents so I'm safe. I know when I started at 10 there would be limits also that a lot of people started at 13 but I just couldn't wait lol. I just think that kids under 16 should just wear the fashion and maybe not go to meet ups but if your over 13 then get Facebook and don't scare Lanie lol.
Im not part of the community, but as long as they aren't going to meetups and using others as babysitters, and acting crazy then I don't see an issue. They also need to know good online safety. It's a very PG style
(Copy and Pasting this from another video where I responded to the same question) I'll probably make a video on this topic in specific, but there are a lot of awesome stores. If you're tech savvy, you can order directly from the brands you like on TaoBao using a Shopping Service. Otherwise, you can purchase the same brands at a mark up through a reseller. Resellers I personally like and use are Clobba Online and My Lolita Dress. However, there's also Lolita Wardrobe and Glitzy Wonderland. If you want to stick to a more sustainable route, I personally buy a lot secondhand, either off of members in my own community or through LaceMarket (LM also protects against buying replicas). You can also buy lolita secondhand on Mercari and Depop but it can be a lot trickier to find real pieces. And then if you're just starting off, Bodyline is also an awesome place to buy stuff. They have some JSKs that are only $10 and they're awesome (I bought a few of them and can confirm it's great quality considering the price). Overall, if you're interested in starting the fashion, definitely check out Big Sisters of Lolita Fashion on FB for more help!
I feel I’m in a bit of the minority here. Im probably going to get hate for this, and so be it, but I’m an adult and as much as I want to say yes, I feel minors are just too immature to be in a community as (for lack of a better word) “rigid” as this. I think the youngest to be in lolita fashion is 16 and even then I feel it’s pushing it. Emotionally and mentally you just aren’t there. I believe the average age of lolitas is around 25-35? And I feel that’s a pretty big age gap compared to the average. Now, this shouldn’t discourage minors from forming their own groups and meet ups (with adult/parental supervision) but in general? I feel you’re too emotionally driven and still growing, developing and learning. There’s just a big disconnect and, again, as an adult, I’d rather younger folks wait until they’re more stable all around. Another note, part of the lolita experience is being able to interact with others. And when most, if not all meet ups/ interactions online are typically for adults or at least 16+, and you can’t go to anything or talk to anyone, you’re barred from that experience. And I don’t really wanna babysit anyone… if you can drive, buy your own clothes, and can handle yourself in situations like an adult then you’re welcome. But honestly no amount of “I’m 15 and I’m mature” will change my mind. I promise you that you aren’t. I hope this doesn’t come off as too harsh but this is just my opinion. I want everyone to be happy with the fashion they wear and that it expresses themselves the way they want it to. However, nothing can truly be 100% inclusive and sometimes you just have to wait a bit and get a bit older to do something. I promise lolita fashion will be waiting for you once you reach that threshold and you’ll be able to do whatever you want.
I disagree with a lot of this. A lot of people like me never go to meetups and I've been wearing lolita for 10 years. I have too much anxiety/struggle socialising with neurotypical people, and one of my friends doesn't even have any where they live. Also, most of us don't drive to buy lolita, as most of us don't live near any shops (I do live near one but I pretty much only buy second hand so I buy all online) Another thing, driving isn't a sign of maturity. Some people cannot drive due to disabilities, and some live in an area where public transportation makes more sense.
@@rainbowdashsailormoon6005 the things I listed don’t need to all be checked off, they were all just examples. I don’t even drive myself and I never said you had to drive to buy lolita. Hell, I’ve been a lone lolita for years now due to my anxiety. I haven’t been to a meet up in a really long time. But I also know how to act in public and have a level of maturity you can only really get with being alive for a certain amount of time, regardless of who you are, just like others. You also don’t have to go to meets ups to be a true lolita. As long as you wear it and wear it properly you’re a lolita. I was a minor when I got into lolita and I 100% regretted getting into it so early. I’m still into it but I went through so much shit I could have avoided. Kinda feels like you just read bits and pieces and commented Also what’s a minor going to do when someone makes a nasty/creepy/unwarranted comment to them? Hell, most ADULTS don’t even know what to do. What’s a kid gonna do? When you’re a minor you don’t have much emotional maturity (hell even some adults dont) or thick skin when it comes to what people say. It’s not anyone’s fault someone says some gross weird creepy shit. But you gotta learn quickly what to do and how to avoid all that and not let it get to you. Again, minors just don’t have that maturity. This is an expensive luxury hobby/fashion, there’s a lot that goes with it mentally, physically and financially. Again, this is just my opinion and experiences.
@@Rhythmloid it doesn't have to be expensive unless you are buying new brand. I started out with Bodyline and then second hand from closet child. It's the only way I've been able to afford it both as a minor and as an adult. Before I was an adult, I was able to build my wardrobe through Christmas and birthday gifts so it can be doable for at least some. About the creepy comments, the sad reality is it doesn't matter what you wear if someone is a ped0. I got creepy sexual comments even in boys jeans and a hoodie both as a minor and adult, as has my friend when they were a minor, so unfortunately speaking from experience minors will get those comments no matter what. Everyone's experience is different. I got into lolita when I was 13 and have absolutely no regrets 10 years later. Luckilly there was already a lot of helpful information on RU-vid so I never really had any issues. (Also I did read the entire thing. I just tend to focus on details since I'm neurodivergent.)
meet ups was never really my kind of interest, this may sound silly but I do find it much more interesting in hanging out with someone that is not in any way a lolita. I'm 14 and solitude as of now is what's helping me to develop myself and my committed art journey. And I completely agree with you, true enough I can't protest. When teens meet ups with older lolitas I realized that good theater need not depend upon speech, that high dramatic effect can be achieved with mime, instead, they should partition meet ups one for 13-17 and others from 18 and so on. Although I would never imagine myself going outside with the other lolitas for meet ups but hopefully for those other young teens out there hanging out with someone close at your age is much more better omp.
The whole fashion is Abt expressing fem fashion in a non sexual empowering way. It sucks people will make it kinky but we can't stop wearing our passions bc of them. I would just make sure they're being guided correctly
I think your original comment got deleted. I saw it in my inbox, but it's not popping up anywhere (it's not in my spam or "held for review" folder either, so idk what happened)
Could me and my cousin wear Lolita Fashion if we’re under 15 and we have support from friends and family and we are mostly always together everyday with friends and family. And if it is okay if we could wear Lolita Fashion??
Just like what the other commenter said, lolita fashion is a very PG style fashion and is meant for everyone. As long as you're respectful to the other community members, then it's up to you what you wear and how you participate in the comm :)
Why not?????? I'm not a brolita, but as a huge fan of Lolita fashion, I think that just like with cosplay, and furry fandom, kids do deserve to be there!!! And I mean kids, not teens. What should be considered, however, is that there should be an online space for them, with parental controls and consent as required by COPPA/GDPR. And there should be kid-friendly, family-oriented Lolita fashion events. Keeping kids under 13 locked down and excluded will do absolutely nothing, also it doesn't protect them. "Stranger danger" is a tall fairytale. I used to think that only adults and teens can be lolitas... When I was a teen, I honestly believed that the cosplay conventions are like nightclubs... It's only now that I have found out that there are Lolita parents...
I think everyone should wear whatever they want. If you are 8 years old and your parents buy lolita ok, why not? BUT for me meetups are a different thing. I founded my community and I don't feel comfortable thinking I have to be sure all the minors are safe... We asked to be at least 18 years old before. Now we accept 16+ (we make very simple and cultural meetings, like museums, gardens, pic-nics, etc). We had 1 girl asking to enter the community when was 14 years old and when I explained why she couldn't come to meetups she got mad 😅 I CAN'T take the responsability to these minors, I am not even paid for! 😂
As a person under the age of 18+ I really like this fashion. But I never wear the Lolita clothes or accessories out. And I don’t really know how to wear this fashion. But I agree with why people under the age of 18+ shouldn’t wear these to like cons? (I’m sorry I don’t know how to word this nor how it works) but I agree with a lot of the know reason.
I'm a minor and I really like how lolita fashion looks, so I would really like wearing lolita fashion myself, but I'm not that much into getting into the comunity- I really think it looks really cute.
I'd rather not.. my daughter has been wearing lolita stuff since she was 5, now ,,8.. I'll let her wear it for now but not go around older people without me around..
So, as a parent of a daughter (though she's far too young for this at the moment) and also a lolita, my thoughts on this are it depends and with some rules. For example, if as a teenager, she both wants to dress like this AND has shown she can take care of her clothing and possessions, then I'm plenty okay with it, especially around 15-16+ years old, wearing and enjoying this fashion. I have no problem with buying dresses and coordinates for birthdays, Christmases, etc for my kiddos. What I do have more of a problem with is them going to meetups without me there, and the reason is just, creepers and tricksters can be anywhere and until they're adults, I want to make sure they're protected. I also do not want to put the responsibility of that on other Lolitas, it's my responsibility as a parent. Just my two cents. I love the fashion, I would love my daughter and future daughters if I have more to enjoy this fashion one day, I just also want them to be safe and you never know what's out there. As for purchasing online, I also had grade and birthday money... one year I bought gemstones on ebay. XD Like... I wanted to be a jeweler and I wanted all the gemstones... so... I paid my parents and used their Paypal. I think teens can do that... there's also prepaid debit cards. :3 Which would make it easier to buy online... not going to lie though, the Sanrio store in the mall got most of my money. LOL
One im a kid two i love getting help from other people three i mo lawns for money i charge twente bucks four i love making new friends online all my lolita accounts have adult supervision and are private btw love ur channel and u made some amazing point🤍
Hello I'm minor starting getting into cosplay and the lolita fashion community and I was wondering what are good stores for wigs,contact lenses for someone who can't spend much money on their first outfit?
For lenses, I always tend to buy from LensVillage. I've been shopping from them for 7 years now and have never had any issues! For wigs, it's hard for me to say since I buy from all over, but I do have tons and tons of wig reviews on my channel from loads of different websites, if you'd like to check that out!!
I think usually this conversation simmers down to whether they should attend lolita spaces in person especially. I think anyone should be allowed to wear the fashion, but the attending of in person meet ups is a tricky subject.
Here in my city the community can't allow minors as the only place in town they accept larger groups without having to rent the entire place for the day has a licence to serve alcohol, and thus have a strict 18+ only policy as per law
heyo! im a minor and I really wanna start becoming a Lolita, but I dont know where to start! im a teen, and my size is pretty small and I know I wanna do like, Sweet style, cupcake style. but, im not sure if there is a store that has my size! Please help! (plus im not sure if there is a store that has good quality affordable dresses!)
Hiii! I’m also a minor beginner Lolita^^ a shop that I like and have researched is 42Lolita they’re a smaller branch of a resale company(smaller branch of 42Agent) where they get items off of taobao(I find taobao very confusing as a starter) and organize it in an easy way for buyers. The dresses are pretty cheap for their good quality but international shipping can get pricey!(I live in North America) Shipping and the whole time from ordering to arrival can take a while (multiple months) so make sure to buy ahead. Also they have rlly good customer service^^
I think anyone can be lolita as long they know how to be lolita and its fashion I brouht a nice Peter Rabbit Authorized Peter Pan Collar Short Sleeves Striped Sweet Lolita Dress Op from devilinspired
I think anyone over 13 that can afford lolita(or has parents that are down to buy) should be able to participate in the online communities. I wouldn't give a kid younger than like 16 brand lolita clothes just bc they are gonna grow so much and whatever fits them when they're 13 probably won't fit them past 16. I would consider indie/taobao brands, though, bc a lot of them make good quality pieces that aren't especially expensive, and hopefully find stuff the kid likes secondhand (or a good enough compromise bc sorry kid, i can't spend $80 on a specific blouse that'll only fit you for a year or two bc you've only had one growth spurt). I think by the time they can drive and be trusted to go out on their own for a long time with no supervision(probably 16-17), they should be allowed to attend meetups.
it depends on the person tbh. I stopped growing when I was 12, and started wearing lolita when I was 13, but I still wear pretty much everything I got 10 years later asided from shoes bc my feet actually shrunk from too much ballet lol. I do agree with second hand though. tbh even as an adult, i only own one brand dress that isnt second hand and that is because my mum insisted I wear a new dress to prom.
I'm 16 and own a dress from devilinspired it's nice and it's military style but the zipper broke and I have yet to get it fixed. Also I don't think anyone under 16 should attend meetups since I've heard alot of stories of people coming in and harassing members and there was this one story from lovely lor where someone went to a Halloween meetup wearing a short costume and flashed the people there and there were like 2 people there that were 16
