Sons and Their Mother Wounds; Loving Men Who Were Raised by an Emotionally Unavailable Mother

Lisa A. Romano Breakthrough Life Coach Inc

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In this video, you will learn about mother wounds in sons, and how an emotionally unavailable mother can impact a man's ability to get in touch with his emotions, which can stunt a son's right to love in healthy ways. Men who have been raised to split themselves from their vulnerable emotions can often feel frustrated by stereotypical unhealthy norms placed upon them, especially when confronted by someone they love, wishing for them to be more emotionally available.
Sons with fathers who have shamed them into believing expressing vulnerable emotions are wrong may learn to believe that negative emotions are wrong, bad, or unacceptable and rely instead on identifying with the roles they play. This can lead to relationship problems, when the spouse of a son who has mother wounds, pushes the son to express his emotions.
Default settings of the brain, which have been programmed to associate fear and pain with expressing vulnerable emotions, will override the son's consciousness and can cause them to remain stuck, feeling frustrated as well, and may also result in a son acting out these conflicts through anger, rage or shutting down.
This is not the son's fault, however, this dynamic can keep a man stuck in the past, regurgitating his trauma, all outside his consciousness, until he decides to make a U turn and he begins learning how to embrace unexplored emotions.
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Lisa A. Romano is a Life Coach and bestselling author who specializes in helping people reclaim their lives through ascending old thought patterns and healing faulty childhood subconscious programs. She is an expert in the fields of codependency, narcissistic abuse, and elevating consciousness. She is also one of the most popular meditation teachers on Insight Timer and is the creator of the 12 Week Breakthrough Coaching Program. If you feel invisible, unworthy, and lack a sense of self or purpose, Lisa's work in the field of personal development can help you gain the self-awareness required to breakthrough.
coach@lisaaromano.com
#sonsandmotherwounds #sons #motherwounds #motherwound #men #rage #narcissisticmother #narcissisticparent #toxicmothers #codependent #codependentmen #toxicrelationships #toxicfamily #adultchildrenofalcoholics

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26 сен 2024

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Комментарии : 244

@cdheidt Год назад

As a teacher in public schools, I am sure that the violence and shootings goes right to these issues. I feel like a therapist during the day- and I am not supposed to fill that role- but the kids look to you because you are spending so much time with them. it can be exhausting.

@lisaaromano1 Год назад

I get that!

@jp5419 Год назад

I can totally see this as well and really empathize with teachers today. This is not your role but it makes sense that these kids would look to teachers to fulfill this need. Very sad and must be exhausted. God bless you and all our superhero teachers.

@DustinRea Год назад

Maybe therapy should be a class all on its own with a specially trained teacher (therapist) to run that class every day

@2fish82 Год назад

We should have an army of therapists in schools

@badjuju5989 Год назад

Thank you for doing that even if it's hard. That's emotionally availability that some kids can't get and desperately need! ❤

@ripley7t429 Год назад

I was molested by my mother many times between ages of 10-12, my sister by my father for years. My mother knew, and beat my sister blaming her for his behavior. My father was an abusive alcoholic narc. I got his beatings and psychological abuse. My mother commited suicide then. I ended up marring a covert narc and finally am free after 31 years. Geesh, what a mess.

@rosipm101 Год назад

Bless your heart. You're doing great. You can see now and have a long life ahead.

@lisaaromano1 Год назад

Oh Dear One, I am so sorry, This is generational trauma and it is not your fault. It sounds like you broke the chains!!!!!!!! I honor you!

@kimgordon3695 Год назад

@@lisaaromano1 As do I 🙏

@yvonneschermerhorn866 Год назад

So glad you were able to move away from their incorgable behavior. Take care of yourself.

@Uberqueenbee Год назад

🫂

@LiftingUrVeil-LUV Год назад

I’m 41 and I had my spiritual awakening in 2020. I just now finally walked away from my mother and entire family. It was hard but I love who I am becoming now away from here. I love her and forgive her but unfortunately our time in each others life has come to a end. Maybe oneday we can but now it’s about my healing and growth

@bengoodes1581 Год назад

💪🏻.

@cabazoncabazon5952 Год назад

Good job...... So did I and boy I am proud❤❤❤❤❤

@sawdustadikt979 Год назад

On the surface, I do not look like the kind of guy deeply involved in this work. I am a large middle aged, self employed carpenter, father and husband. I grew up in a generationally traumatized, poor and narcissistic family that I separated myself from almost 20 years ago. As far as I can tell from what I’ve learned is that my father is a malignant narcissist with a lot of sociopathic traits and my mother is a vulnerable narcissist and or bpd. I was very emeshed with her, she treated me like her husband since I was small, convinced me to drop out of trade school to provide for the family and was there to destroy every achievement, however small and make it about her. This work to attempt to heal has cost me an immense amount of money, time, effort and capacity. I have a wonderful loving family and I will commit to whatever it takes to keep my baggage in my lane till I’m free of it. In these family systems it’s the norm to do the same horrible things that happened to them to defenseless children so they can feel better, it was good enough for me, it’s good enough for you. F-- that! I’ve learned so much here. Thank you for all the time and effort.

@lisaaromano1 Год назад

You are breaking free and that’s awesome!

@cabazoncabazon5952 Год назад

Same!!!!!!!

@LastRebel1978 7 месяцев назад

Yes sir that’s what I’ve seen and the conclusion I came to when young even though I’ve failed in many ways made my best attempt except for the covert narc woman I married. Lost her but saved sons I believe…….

@ImpulsoCreativo9322 4 месяца назад

❤what have you done to heal? My husbands past sounds just like yours butbhe isnt much intl healing yet

@lisainthestudio Год назад

My husband died three weeks ago. We had been separated since last year because his mother still had control over his life. She took control of everything after he died and doesn't want me at the funeral. Even in death she still won't let go of control of him. The best I can do is heal my emotional wounds so that our 8 year old daughter doesn't inherent our baggage.

@padthai411 Год назад

sorry for your loss, my deepest condolences.

@lisaaromano1 Год назад

I am So sorry for your loss🙏

@jp5419 Год назад

I'd give her a piece of my mind and tell her now her son can finally be free of her and at peace. Protect your daughter from those darm witch. Sorry for yours and you and your daughter's loss.

@Nuverselive Год назад

My condolences for u and your family. May u be blessed to end these cycles of trauma! Your in a great community of loving ppl who are all on a path of healing ❤

@bebamayer9744 Год назад

Jesus mourns with you, so sorry

@skinscapetattoo Год назад

Tears streaming down my face. I’m meeting my son tomorrow and I know what I must do.

@cblisswellness Год назад

I realized at yesterday years old that I had passed on mother wounds to my son as an unhealed mother that had an unhealed mother. It caused him to pick unhealed women and now one of those women has a baby. Though I have been on my healing journey for awhile, I didn't understand the impact to him as a child before I started working on myself. Its time to break generational patterns/curses. Knowledge is power! Thank you so much!!

@cabazoncabazon5952 Год назад

It's never too late❤❤❤❤❤

@andreatorluemke4982 Год назад

Healed mothers. Heal their children yes. I wish more people talked about this.

@km_6181 Год назад

💔😭 I’m struggling to get through this video in one take. Thank you for this education. I’m going to be praying for my brothers out there who are coming out of this💔😭

@lisaaromano1 Год назад

The truth sets us free and our higher self is only eclipsed by trauma...

@Hexen_ 9 месяцев назад

My mother taught me from a young age not to trust or love anyone. She always told me that someone may love me today and not tomorrow, teaching me not to show love to anyone, and that everyone will betray me. This now affects me because I can't establish bonds with anyone. The fear of being hurt is immense, and I always put up barriers. I really need to go to the psychologist again.

@Hexen_ 9 месяцев назад

I feel like I'll never love anyone. I just can't, I'm scared of rejection. My mom used to love me, and the next day she would hit me.

@PrisaVS Месяц назад

@@Hexen_your mom is my dad. I have daddy issues because of him. He treated me exactly how he treated me and I’m very sorry you lived through hell as well. He’s my hug! 🤗 ❤

@fremmer007 11 месяцев назад

Im 45. My mother left me and my dad when I was 3. She was very young and didnt know what she was doing, i think. Very impulsive, angsty and alcholic woman. Her own mom was strict and abusive and died of cancer when I was born. I was raised by my dad and my grandparents and only saw my mom one weekend pr month. Sometimes she couldnt take care of me because she was drunk. My dads new wife was a strict woman and saw me as competiton because my dad and I was close. Only as an adult I realised how it affected my life. I think men need to be able to speak about these things with eachother the way women have been speaking about abusive or negligent dads. Thank you for the video. It hit home.

@fightswithspirits915 Год назад

Emotions is the key. It is the spiritual battleground. Demons attack emotions to destroy the person. Demons put people against people. Jesus said he comes with a sword. He puts people against people. This has been recently revealed to me but I don't know why. NB: This video had me crying and I'm grateful for still being that sensitive little boy. Thank you.

@iwhippedcreamcode4642 3 месяца назад

Jesus Isn't The Problem! Dishonesty in People Are!

@SuperRockfoundation 24 дня назад

@fightswithspirits915 In Luke 12:51 Jesus is talking about the last days. He talks about division as those who won’t accept His truth will be divided with those who do and so both will be in opposition with each other. If you read the whole chapter you will understand with the context.

@sophisticatedbeauty8334 Год назад

My son is 6 months old my my main motivation of my healing journey is him because I don't want to pass on my trauma onto him.

@kat-75 Год назад

Breaking the cycle is a great thing to do

@padthai411 Год назад

Amen

@MikeMadison-z7o Год назад

My mom abused me until she died. She said she wished she murdered me at birth. I had to make decision to take her off life support when her new husband left the room. I treated her with love and kindness. Her father abused her. I healed through forgiveness and prayer. I will suffer from it until I die, but God has given me hope and blessings. All glory to Jesus Christ, our lord and savior. I look forward not backward. ❤❤

@flowerchild89 Год назад

My narcissistic mother made my only brother the Golden Child. To this day, and he's 42. I believe he is a narcissist, too. I don't have anything to do with them.

@everlastinggobbstopper Год назад

I relate 100%

@FLJAMESFL Год назад

Same here 😢

@nunyabidness4946 Год назад

You may not have anything to do with them but you're going to be utilizing a single global currency Implemented by THE narc. =psychology is satanic indoctrination like the proven hoax of ev0lution. See Piltd0wn man and statement made by Nokia chief executive officer Lundmark at W0rld Ec0nomic F0rum = mark of beaast in this decade. I'd give you more details but I'm censored heavily.

@nunyabidness4946 Год назад

Christ= Do not think that I came to bring peace on earth. I did not come to bring peace but a sword. 35 For I have come to ‘set[a] a man against his father, a daughter against her mother, and a daughter-in-law against her mother-in-law’; 36 and ‘a man’s enemies will be those of his own household.’

@hallisdahelenthynaanakman4117 Год назад

Love the solitude.

@terridillon3053 Год назад

Sent this video to my son Hoping to open space for us to talk and move forward in our relationship. Thank you

@mifflinfinity 2 месяца назад

That was very brave, I hope it opened up a healthy dialogue between you guys. These wounds take years to improve between a mother and son, so if it’s slow going don’t give up, the peace you and your son can both feel after building a stronger bridge between your hearts is worth it. ❤😊

@jimyounger9490 Год назад

The person who gave birth to me and raised me is an evil , despicable , self centered , cruel and ruthless being. And a covert destructive narcissist in which I’m her empath. I’m in the process of breaking free , going zero contact , and try and carry on and heal.

@joelrotiago3308 Год назад

Thank you Lisa. You've helped me escape the fog I've been in for 44 years. I'm a grown man taking care of my religious malignant covert narcissist mother. Since realizing what the heck was happening has been about 6 months tops. You've helped change my life for the better faster and healthier than I ever thought I thought was possible. Some days I detest being around her, I've finally l foolishly voiced my grievances for all to be ignored of course. But I'm supposed to pretend all is well. Now I know why my dad suffered so badly physically, it was from her unreasonable controlling and abuse. The neglect I know remember happened is difficult to accept, while giving my abuser my time and attention.

@kozubart Год назад

It’s a weird feeling when you’ve been in this kind of dynamic so long and focused on healing, that you don’t even realize your wounds have become scars 🙏💯

@LJDMack01 Год назад

I didn’t have a mother, I was raised by my father and grandparents. However, it fit perfectly but it was my father. He was an addict and nothing I did was good enough and I got removed from my home placed in foster care bcz he would beat me. I ended up in unhealthy relationships but after raising my sons etc.. I’ve seen how my actions affected them. I honestly did my best, but at the time I never knew better. I went to therapy etc.. now realizing how bad they had it. I took a lot out on them and said many hurtful words to them. How can I start their healing? They’re not going to a therapist, so I sent this to them. I truly love them and I hope they listen to it. Thank you for all your videos. They have helped me a lot. I began watching you about 7 years ago when I left a narcissist. You’ve truly helped me through it. I will continue to work on myself and try to be a better mother!

@lisaaromano1 Год назад

I believe in you🙏

@padthai411 Год назад

Sounds like you are doing the right things. Dont be too hard on yourself, it wasnt your fault. It is brave wanting to heal and make the future better. Happy healing and brave self love. All around us gets better when we turn within.

@juliedahl1892 Год назад

I know I have damaged my son in emotional circumstances. But he is a man. He is a decent , understanding person. He is way more of a man , than my husband ever was. He broke the cycle , him & my daughter!!! I have told them both this. I love how they turned out in their lives. I don’t but in , but I do put in my 2 cents, or ideas. Hopefully that’s not to much. They have & do help me understand things going on around us. 👏❤️❤️

@andreatorluemke4982 Год назад

You are doing the repair work angel. I’m sure your son loves you so much!!!❤❤❤. Thanks for showing people how to do the work of healing their childhood trauma. Everyone needs to do this work for sure. It’s the root of everything that is right. Amen

@lisaaromano1 Год назад

Amen Dear One🙏

@theearnesttruth849 Год назад

Here you go again delivering the on point and exact explanation of the aforementioned dynamic! I LOVE YOU LISA ROMANO!!! Thank U 🙏🏾 Wow the impact of unavailable emotional care takers is devastating! I am overcoming and just now learning how to be present and available with masculine embodiment!!! My son and I have been effected because I became just like what I learned from my mother!

@cabazoncabazon5952 Год назад

❤❤❤❤❤❤

@john123wayne Год назад

thank you for a video for the boys / men. the boys and men are called "toxic", and "patriarchy toxicity"...and ad nauseum. emotions and emotional struggles touch both genders. i am happy for this video.

@lisaaromano1 Год назад

I am glad to hear that Sally!

@olive4naito Год назад

To be fair toxic masculinity labels exist because many men have childhood trauma. The toxicity comes from repressed emotions and feeling inadequate. It's interesting to know that dismissive avoidants are mostly men and anxious preoccupieds are mostly women. So while there is a mix of men and women in both groups, generations of imposed traditional societal rules have resulted in more men being dismissive avoidants while more women end up anxious preoccupied. So it's understandable that a label was created for the toxicity from the false childhood beliefs mostly prominent among men. But for sure more discussion needs to be had surrounding imposed traditional gender roles such as emotional shaming as it affects both genders. I feel the whole male toxicity term in a way was a societal response to how women were labeled for years as drama queens and attention seekers. 😢

@NB-yu4lj Год назад

@@olive4naito wrong, it’s a sneaky way to attack and degrade men. We don’t except your way of making that term okay.

@mingo2024 Год назад

My ex is so completely enmeshed with his mother. I literally can't. If you are a grown man and you are talking to your mother every day, multiple times a day, no sir.

@_Trakman Год назад

FINALLY, MENS EMOTIONS ARE VISIBLE

@joelofty6436 Год назад

In word only

@susanhewitt6359 Год назад

I have worried about my son and the effects that I and his malignant narcissist father have had on him. I was unhealed myself from childhood emotional and sexual abuse, and I was overprotective because of what happened to me. I'm thinking about sending him this video because I love him so much and he has a lot of anger inside that I worry about. I care about what his emotional state is and want to help him (and myself)heal. You are certainly visible to me!

@elainebobier2923 Год назад

I truly appreciate the insight regarding the relationship between a son and mother who carried unhealed trauma. This insight reinforces my resolve to remain single.

@ra3690 19 дней назад

One of the best messages I’ve EVER seen on youtube. Your message was spot on and precise. Your knowledge helped me out tremendously! Be blessed

@mauricefinn1320 Год назад

So correct. Thank you for having a video on how men are affected by this type of situation. What you said resonated with me. Bless you 🙏😊

@josephmurphy8129 Год назад

Part of learning was through healing the buried layers that come up to express to be heard felt released , so much grieving , loss , crying , you reverse learn about feelings emotions what grieving looks like more clearer . I’m witnessing processing the narc in someone who gets even by denying others , that part of the ego thst says if I don’t get love the way I wish your getting nothing 💚

@porshemaysonet1540 11 месяцев назад

I’ve been watching you for a couple hrs! You saved me…. I sent this to my daughters father I hope he receives this message. Thank you for these videos. God sent me here I’m convinced

@writer1986 Год назад

My husband's dad worked all the time (we think as avoidance), and his mom was left to care for two boys. My MIL can be controlling and manipulative, and her inability to think about others causes a lot of arguments. My husband is emotionally detached (aside from anger), and talking about emotions can cause him to retreat to another part of the house. It's very frustrating. We've tried couples counseling, but he still won't open up. Now it's just me in therapy, talking for the both of us, and making sense of how our childhood traumas impact our marriage.

@mariobryant8803 Год назад

Oh my goodness- Lisa hit it right on the nose once again. The son husband, she called it right. I had to completely shut her out of my life, she’s tried everything to destroy me even when I’m nowhere near her. I know my needs didn’t matter to her, it pushed me away to the point where I couldn’t deal with her. She wanted all control of every part of my life, I can’t deal with that kind of behavior. My health is my #1 priority. That part of men not being unemotional, that’s a bunch of garbage, I’ve had ex’s and my own folks bash me on that also. Lisa’s putting out the perfect memo. I was bullied by my mom, older brothers and sister and they could never respect me as a person. It’s a dangerous road to go down and can lead you to the grave.

@蔣承達-q2z Год назад

Thank you Lisa, so great to start this journey because of you, and to continue to have you working tirelessly to shed light on the truth.

@lisaaromano1 Год назад

You are so welcome!

@Suzu52 Год назад

Did you write a book on mother wounds, because this resonates with me, both as the mother of sons, and as the child of an emotionally unavailable mother.

@lisaaromano1 Год назад

I believe my books can help and my healing 12 Week Breakthrough program www.lisaaromano.com/12wbcp

@Suzu52 Год назад

@Lisa A. Romano Breakthrough Life Coach Inc. I found this particular video to be so compelling that during my future ex's stop here today to grab some clothes after golf as he heads back to his other house, I made the mistake of asking him to listen to it with me so we could discuss the impact both of our behaviors had on our sons....he made it through about 8 minutes and literally closed his eyes.....and pretended to be asleep..I picked up my phone and left the room.....he didn t even apologize....he is just a horrible person ( whom everyone thinks is a great guy)........I am in a very dark place

@suzymagan7575 Год назад

Thank you, Lisa, for ALL you do to move us forward 🙏

@lisaaromano1 Год назад

It’s an honor🙏

@johnpluta1768 Год назад

One thing I remember from growing up was the hidden rage that erupted when I was 21. Subconsciously I felt that my family didn't have anything substantial for me, my mom was codependent in a messed up home life both of us had endured in the 80s 90s. Sexuality and emotions were weapons of survival.

@lisaaromano1 Год назад

I hear you Dear One, honoring your truth is the first step to breaking free from the chains of the past.

@colleenproctor8212 Год назад

Thank god you'll never stop! I've been following you for almost 5 years. I'm in a much better place, and this helps me stay fluent in my new language - reality. ❤

@pheebe5729 Год назад

I knew my narcs issues came from is mom but this really shed light on what’s going on with him. He always tells our son I wish I had a mother like your mom And i would be much more successful

@peggyscribner2604 Год назад

The man i love was born because his mother wanted to see if it would help her arthritis. At 7 years old he was cleaning her wounds, staph infection. This video gave me eyes i didn't have before. Thank you.

@decoder3449 Год назад

I'm the daughter with the mother wound. I was a spouse while my father was absent and sleeping with other women. At the same time I had to serve everyone and put my own needs to sleep even as a wife. My mother owned me like cinderella. I was emotionally abandoned.

@sweethomefarm1 9 месяцев назад

Wow. When you talk about not being able to feel anything hut sadness and or fits of rage but having no other feelings except for temporary fleeting moments of happiness you are spot on! This is how I felt growing up and as an early adult. I thank god for a deep dive into an honest look at myself and a huge change happened when i decided i would live for God. I got married and had children and they jave been such a joy! Just now beginning to come to the full realization of my own mommy issues and have begin a separating process because I didn't realize that i was still that little boy who just thought that if he worked hard enough he would make mommy happy. Over this last year things came to a head and i now realize mommy will never be happy and it is not my responsibility to make her happy. My wife children and i will be creating some space so that this sort of behaviour doesnt ruin us !! Very sad.

@bengoodes1581 Год назад

This is so important . Love your kids not control them . It's done through action with Love . Love evokes emotion in the child . An emotion of security. We can change as Men and Women. Believe it.Thank you.

@teachersamtravels4028 3 месяца назад

This was absolutely brilliant. I'm so thankful for this video. Thank you for clearing things up.

@cdheidt Год назад

Uhm, you nailed my fam. Boys want to fix and be the healer for Mom, especially when Dad avoids it completely. Vicious circle!

@johnbroadway4196 Год назад

Yes, I've been trying to getting over what my Mother did to me. And as my Father was a part time Dad, hardly ever being able to give me any instructions. The 70's was nothing but getting my Ass beat all the time. Lots of my fault.

@josephmurphy8129 Год назад

Trapped forced to decipher the cryptic, mixed up thinking , in someone who is in their monkey trying to.communicate , control , fish or test , it gets maddening . 💚

@jackgoff6215 2 месяца назад

Literally my childhood wow

@briant5135 6 месяцев назад

My grandmother was divorced twice. My mother did not grow up with her father. My Mother is divorced twice. I did not grow up with my father. Ive seen her with many boyfriends. On my fathers side all is lost from intergenerational addictions. I feel like by the time i become more whole and congruent as a man ill be too old to start a family. If i have to die alone to break the cycle than so be it.

@jp5419 Год назад

A wife should never try to heal the husband. Once she has presented or unveiled the unhealthy mother-son enmeshment, it's the responsibility of husband to work on the unhealthy connection. I only asked that my spouse shield me and our family from his enmeshed parents. Alas, their hold is too strong. I'm always the sacrificial lamb. He uses our child to get $. They dangle vacation tixs and money.... and he'd rather take it than grow up and step up. If you have kids, go and heal yourself and then look for someone who has done the work or willing to do so.

@lisaaromano1 Год назад

We can't heal anyone but ourselves. We can, however, seek to understand. If a partner is unwilling to grow, and one partner wants to grow, this creates an unhealthy dynamic and yes, I agree, in some cases parting ways is the healthiest choice, no matter how difficult.

@stephaniep1761 Год назад

Men rarely heal their trauma wounds, except through seeking out someone who will accept them, attempting to prove their competence through work, and passive aggression.

@tojoetiny4482 Год назад

Thank you Lisa👏🏿. I didn't know what I did not know🤯.NPD is real! Co-dependence,truma bonding,gaslighting,to the discard! My mom,my first wife ,soon to be divorced again(63yrs). Thanks to your coaching now,it's time for me to HEAL!!! ❤Lisa....

@lisaaromano1 Год назад

Amazing!!!!

@GoodWolfWonRocky Год назад

Think i may be one of those sons. The youngest with two much older sisters. I had 3 mothers, narcissistic strong trait father and co dep mom. Her mother ran the roost and had a passive father. This stuff all makes so much sense once its explained. Its fascinating, and enangering, that it can be documented and understood. I wish i could have learned earlier in life to see my sisters, mother and father be happier. Someone had to give access to a more healthy psychology.

@teresajacksoncroneiser6616 Год назад

Thank you so much for sharing your knowledge and experience. As I research why my husband has treated me like he has for 40+ years, I am understanding more and more of why he is like he is. He has been narcissistic and gaslighting me most of our marriage. I just thought things would get better. Wow was I wrong. Now I’m understanding that there is underlying issues. Through my research, I’m finding out that there is a reason behind his behavior. I never knew there was a thing called gaslighting nor could I ever figure out why he always put his mother before me in our relationship. I finally realized that he wasn’t going to change and I need to think about me and my health first. So we are currently in the process of divorce. Once again, thank you.

@anitageraffo2730 Год назад

One of the BEST videos you ever did Lisa . God bless you . Thank you ❤️🫶🏻❤️❤️🫶🏻❤️🫶🏻❤️

@melissawilliams7337 Год назад

Thank you for this! I have 2 brothers and explains a lot! My brothers cater to my mom. As the scapegoat daughter, I'm the problem.

@susanhewitt6359 Год назад

In the same boat. I hear you and it's not you, it's them😊

@swissms5808 Год назад

👏🏼👏🏼🙌🏼 Very Informative !! Absolutely 💯 true and hopefully this wakes up parents to be self aware how our words and actions plant seeds and shape our children !!

@stanleymaestas5441 Год назад

Thank you, Lisa Romano 😘 🙏 😊 😀 😄 for showing me. I learned something new today. I am enough no matter what. Nameste ❤️ everyone 💜.

@josephmurphy8129 Год назад

I think a type of wound is not understanding being given a chance to discover the range depth beauty of expression of feelings emotions in women and men and thrive through it because you had been kept in a small world

@marinajones2309 9 месяцев назад

So interesting - I'm dating a dismissive avoidant, and had problems with him. I've managed to gently bring it to his attention. I have been shocked & pleasantly surprised in the way he received this information and is looking into getting the help he needs to heal. I definitely will be so much more mindful of how I relate to him, which I have been since identifying his attachment style. It is not his fault - it breaks my heart 😢😢😢

@JustMeAndMyBoy 5 месяцев назад

@marinajones2309 how did u gently bring it to his attention pls?

@TanyaRadic Год назад

Thank you . I just sent this 😢. You told the truth .Love your personal experience top❤

@dgvfsa66 Год назад

I was a single mother at 17. My son was the answer to my prayers. Finally, someone to love me. But I had nothing to give. I was an empty shell. I was so neglected by my mother I had no idea how to be one. My son died last year at 45. As I continue my therapy, I feel deep shame and guilt for putting my needs first, hurting him, and undermining his self-esteem. I will never forgive myself.

@cabazoncabazon5952 Год назад

I am soooooo sorry for your loss 🙏❤❤❤❤

@jovenhate 6 месяцев назад

You sound like my mother, she knows I was her crutch

@mifflinfinity 2 месяца назад

I’m so sorry. ❤

@oliverkhoo Год назад

I never knew such term exist.

@romedeleon1715 7 месяцев назад

Many will judge you hard for this. Outstanding.

@raiderlove5923 Год назад

Thank you for this video, Lisa. I had a mother that this video talks about.

@donnadaniels5095 Год назад

The best advice I can give people is to take a look at the enemy within there household mother and father, always starts at home first... and then that way people can be aware of the narcissism Behavior codependent toxicity of these generational curses, I pray for healing for anyone🙏🏽 who had to experience this nonsense👺

@shirleychristieson8587 Год назад

This was a superb listen, im so glad i stumbled upon you Lisa, your videos or always bang on point and they are a grst resource on my healing journey. Thank you ❤🙏

@donnadaniels5095 Год назад

Thank you for this video⚘ I can relate to my Ex mothers wombs of narcissistic 🎭 tried to hide her wounds🤷‍♀️⛓ and project her narcissism on me, but being spiritually awake👁 refusing to pick up that energy, it backfired on her, being a chosen one 💪 who came to break the generational curse, off of her & Her, ancestors , family, they did not want to repent, of their sins🙏🏽so God! remove me from the situation, in order to be safe, glory to God super Empath AWAKEN 👁

@terrancemcclendon456 Год назад

The worst is the motive to pin siblings against each other..."this sibling is mama boy or daddy favorite" to pick alliance

@gustavooes2382 7 месяцев назад

Thank you for all the information My parents have a really good heart, but they both went through a very difficult childhood, and this reflected in my life as in my siblings' as well. I was able to start healing when I moved to another country and couldn't be in this support position for my mom anymore. It was painful for me at that time, but nowadays I am starting to understand that was necessary. The hard part is to not seek the same conection in my relationships.

@cyndysanchez1870 11 месяцев назад

My partner has this wound and it makes it so hard to live day to day. I love him but I’ve had enough. Part of me understands what’s going on but until he can heal from this it won’t stop. He is also aware of it but hasn’t made a change just yet. We have had our ups and downs and ultimately as crazy as it sounds i know we both have so much love for each other. I can’t keep excusing his behavior because I’m aware of what’s going on. Letting go has been so hard and i wish it wasn’t like this. But maybe he needs to go through this healing alone so he can finally beat it. I know deep down inside he’s a good man and i know he has the strength to get make a difference. I don’t know how long it will take but for now a separation is needed. I too struggle with generational trauma and that’s what caused so many triggers. We joke about how we just keep tossing the hot potato to each other and how we are so ready to drop it and just be happy but it still hasn’t happened. My family and friends hate him for his actions and for the stress he causes me but i understand why. I really wish things were like this because he really is the love of my life

@shakethatlaffytaffy3 2 месяца назад

Do you have any update? Going through something similar. Thanks.

@cyndysanchez1870 2 месяца назад

@@shakethatlaffytaffy3 well that was 9 months ago and things never got better. I’ve moved on with my life and wish him the best but don’t think he has made any changes to his behavior. He’s mentioned a couple of things he has done to “change” but ultimately they are just words and not actions. I am happier now without him and all the stress and drama he would bring into our relationship. But just because i understand him doesn’t mean i need him. The advise i would give you is heal for yourself💜it’s difficult but manageable. Once you do that new doors open up for you. You can still have love for that person you once knew but it doesn’t ultimately consume your whole heart.

@ItsSoarTime 9 месяцев назад

no children. wanted 12 sons. sort of happy i have none because i would have wounded them all because i'm just now realizing that i'm wounded and need healing and am working to heal. sighing deeply. BUT i'm interested in a male who exposed me to his mother wounds DAY ONE!... didn't know what i was dealing with in him or in me.... now i do. ....still learning! still healing! hoping he'll be open to receiving the information i have to pass on from this wonderful woman and others. Happy New YOU!

@keLv_dGeneRAL 9 дней назад

Damn🤧Krazy how everything she said is true. Personally I think that I was emotionally neglected by my mother when I was young. That was after my father died in a tragic car accident. My mother tried by all means to ensure that my sister and I went to bed with full stomachs. But she was working in a job where she was earning just enough for us to be fed. I think the problem was my father's passing. Thy man was sometimes abusive. It got to the point where I would ask my mother for some things which mattered to me as a kid; like a soccer ball...You know what she would sometimes say?😭 "Go tell your father in the grave." Got to the point when I decided to go live with my grandparents who are my father's parents. As for school, I was and still an erudite. I always worked hard at school because my family's financial situation is a predicament. What hurt me most and even now, is that even though I have achieved so much academically I still feel as if it's not enough. When I'd voice out what I needed I'd be forced to shut down. All I ever needed from my mother was emotional support. And now that's catching up with me. Low self-esteem , low confidence, and my relationships with other people are mostly just not on the right lane. I even got to the point of telling my mama just how helpful it would for her to support me as I'm currently a uni student. You know what she said?😹💔... Still can't recover from it, worse of all she's even cut communication with me just because I told her that she's not supportive. I remember breaking down a few weeks ago while I was talking to my long-distance girlfriend on the phone. When she tried to get me to open up I couldn't, just kept crying and crying. I eventually told her that everything was going well but I never told her what was my problem. Childhood Trauma Is Real.

@chinuaumano Год назад

This is your best video for me yet you have touched on everything I think about and live out

@AdamantlyAdams Год назад

This is a fascinating lesson. My mother and her husband were straight horrible.

@josephmurphy8129 Год назад

Thank you many blessings !

@padthai411 Год назад

I want to watch this but its too close to the bone, ive been dealing with this in therapy for the past 9 years, slowly slowly.

@lisaaromano1 Год назад

You are enough🙏

@dakota-rt8kd 3 месяца назад

Totally, I often speak about this subject. Unhealed people, hurting others. 😅🎉🙄💯✅

@fireballproductions6451 Год назад

Thank you, Lisa 💜✨ What an amazing present for men!

@carlimiller5993 2 месяца назад

18:46 husband not being able to express loss or grief bc of mother wounds and getting mad from being told they don’t know how to show emotions

@katesun2957 Год назад

Thank you.

@carlimiller5993 2 месяца назад

19:50 a society that struggles with expressing emotions and emotional regulation-socially driven to depend in external approvals

@BSLW405 10 месяцев назад

Thank you. I needed this video.

@Wadud-n1z 4 месяца назад

Great talk and job and work

@saniya5408 10 месяцев назад

I am completely with you ... I agree .... I wish more people could understand this .... Especially in India ... So many stereotypes who see but don't want to understand and just run away .... I wish this turns as many lives as possible to be aware and to understand

@carlimiller5993 2 месяца назад

17:00 relationships who also have mother wounds stonewalling, etc

@deek8765 11 месяцев назад

A friend of mine had an unresolved childhood trauma as his mother left at his early age. He is a nice man but somehow none of his relationships were successful, like a broken marriage, failed relationships, sometimes he wanted to marry but after a few years he decides to end the relationship even if the girl was still interested marrying him. Sometimes, he would text everyday and all of sudden he is such a workaholic and avoids communication. Like he doesn't call but text, he doesn't react if a close friend of his going back to their country , he doesn't react or even call.Why do you think he is like that?

@robincoloma7126 10 месяцев назад

This is what I have dealt with through this marriage, with a narcissistic mother-in-law!

@christinamarcille5280 9 месяцев назад

My mother called me Sarah Burnheart too ! I was also told "not everyone's sensitive like you." Sad I have a son and I always work on my relationship with my son bc I had a tough childhood and didn't want to do the same to him

@pheebe5729 Год назад

Exactly. I refer to my narc as not a human being. More like an alien or plastic person w no feelings no emotions. But over the top emotion and drama over little things like button pops of shirt.

@trinitychiplove Год назад

I can’t believe my parents both encourage my brother to drink underage and that they seems to think I’m strange or boring because I choose not to drink

@suzetteclarke1709 Год назад

I learned so much from this video. Thank you so much

@valeriejoyce5407 Год назад

Thank You Lisa🌷 ✨💜✨

@DeeLite220 Год назад

Will this help me understand our 83 year old dad? He’s tortured us and we’re trying here

@natalibra Год назад

You can be empathetic and understanding, see the links to the past and ask your partner to get help. Whether they will or not however, is not in our control, nor is it our responsibility 🙏