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Spitters are Quitters 

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Comedy

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26 сен 2024

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Комментарии : 567   
@oledilep
@oledilep 5 лет назад
Half of them are grossed out, and the other half are in loving relationships. had me rolling
@karencamacho5219
@karencamacho5219 3 года назад
Had me lmao
@apb38
@apb38 3 года назад
Funny cause its true.
@sabinevandaele4175
@sabinevandaele4175 3 года назад
i'm also in a loving relationship first time i swallowed he could'nt believe , 65 , becoming so old and first time a woman does that better late than never
@200130769
@200130769 3 года назад
That was the cherry on top lmao
@Kinobambino
@Kinobambino 2 года назад
@@sabinevandaele4175 damn thats a good girl he got 😮‍💨 🤧
@farleydbear
@farleydbear 8 лет назад
this man voiced marty in madagascar
@warriorcatsfandom2799
@warriorcatsfandom2799 6 лет назад
Um..... Your picture.... Is quite... Unique.. Or am I just dirty minded???
@cl759
@cl759 5 лет назад
Soooo.. You wanted to tell us he kisses his children with that mouth, you prude you.
@anchyi1202
@anchyi1202 5 лет назад
OH GOD
@KizWhalifa.
@KizWhalifa. 5 лет назад
thanks genius
@blazerix8
@blazerix8 5 лет назад
IT ALL MAKES SENSE NOW
@havesomegratitude
@havesomegratitude 5 лет назад
Chris Rock's ability to change clothes instantly is very impressive
@jorgeanthony878
@jorgeanthony878 5 лет назад
I'm dead wtf 😂
@jeremylawrence1987
@jeremylawrence1987 4 года назад
Looked in comments to see if anybody noticed
@TheSilverGate
@TheSilverGate 4 года назад
The special was recorded in muliple cities, through the whole special they do transitions like that.
@CarlosMorales-dn8ww
@CarlosMorales-dn8ww 4 года назад
Amazing !!!!
@matheuscruz8574
@matheuscruz8574 4 года назад
And location too
@kudosayala4943
@kudosayala4943 5 лет назад
Ironically enough, he was a spitter in Madagascar
@AlexInF1
@AlexInF1 5 лет назад
Kudos Ayala oh god no...
@delanoblanco2248
@delanoblanco2248 5 лет назад
He thought he was different because he can spit.
@najahshikamaru620
@najahshikamaru620 4 года назад
PAUSE
@tainicon4639
@tainicon4639 4 года назад
It’s my first rectal thermometer... mother fu..phth... pah... pah..!!
@Lonely-DmoeN
@Lonely-DmoeN 2 года назад
Oh hell no 🤣🤣🤣🤣
@JarellLavender89
@JarellLavender89 5 лет назад
Hard to leave a girl that can swallow and cook
@Moiez101
@Moiez101 5 лет назад
@C. W's hell of a combo? My dude, that's baseline, that's basic. Every girl in a relationship better be able to do that.
@Moiez101
@Moiez101 5 лет назад
@C. W's the sad reality is that many guys arent joking.
@Tommy_Mac
@Tommy_Mac 5 лет назад
...and the cooking part isn't that important.
@jeffthevomitguy1178
@jeffthevomitguy1178 5 лет назад
@@Moiez101 combos exist that can be both baseline and good, like fries and ketchup. Or pb&j.
@gcg8187
@gcg8187 5 лет назад
@C. W's aka Dub agree
@olemagnarnisjalkk2937
@olemagnarnisjalkk2937 5 лет назад
I can’t listen to this without picturing a zebra
@AB-gz9yb
@AB-gz9yb 5 лет назад
Ole Magnar Nisjaløkk lol same
@dumisanimiya3803
@dumisanimiya3803 5 лет назад
Lool that's racist
@jonahs92
@jonahs92 5 лет назад
@@dumisanimiya3803 No, it isn't lmfao. He voiced a zebra named Marty in the Madascar films. That's what "Willy Wanka The pedo" is referencing.
@dumisanimiya3803
@dumisanimiya3803 5 лет назад
Lool I was joking bro i have seen Madagascar
@decaytred9500
@decaytred9500 4 года назад
Same
@SereneSimian
@SereneSimian 2 года назад
Will was just mad when he found out that Jada swallows...but only for August
@zennozangetsu1164
@zennozangetsu1164 2 года назад
BRUH
@Empath_Doll
@Empath_Doll 2 года назад
🤣🤣🤣
@rayutuanda6550
@rayutuanda6550 2 года назад
LMFAOOOO WTF
@brosephbroheim6428
@brosephbroheim6428 Год назад
She gave up the booty to August only.
@25shadow11
@25shadow11 Год назад
SHOTS FIRED
@MoTanG_0o
@MoTanG_0o 5 лет назад
Just because he came doesn't mean you made him came 😂
@SunBro_Talos
@SunBro_Talos 5 лет назад
aman tmg *don’t *cum
@jeffthevomitguy1178
@jeffthevomitguy1178 5 лет назад
@@SunBro_Talos *insufferable www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/insufferable
@sisamusudroka3000
@sisamusudroka3000 5 лет назад
Fax
@jrickg9024
@jrickg9024 5 лет назад
Fax
@joejohnson8933
@joejohnson8933 4 года назад
@@SunBro_Talos u must be salty 🤣🤣🤣
@robertkess9907
@robertkess9907 5 лет назад
Him and Bill Burr, they never fail to deliver, never.
@sabinevandaele4175
@sabinevandaele4175 3 года назад
big fan of both
@dfredankey
@dfredankey 2 года назад
Dave chapelle honorable mention
@RichardHulswit
@RichardHulswit 2 месяца назад
@@dfredankey Word..
@realsevencarter
@realsevencarter 5 лет назад
felt so good I could read Arabic 😂😂😂😂
@Jack-cr4sy
@Jack-cr4sy 5 лет назад
طيب ايش قاعد اقول ؟
@خالدالجابري-ح2ل
@خالدالجابري-ح2ل 4 года назад
Shut up
@entropyfan9417
@entropyfan9417 4 года назад
@@Jack-cr4sy fine what am I saying?
@yes-wo7qn
@yes-wo7qn 4 года назад
يا مرحبا
@matt-tx9hv
@matt-tx9hv 3 года назад
Please explain this. I don't get it haha
@JavaChipFrappe
@JavaChipFrappe 11 лет назад
Imagining Marty from Madagascar saying this makes me laugh lol
@rccrashburn
@rccrashburn 10 лет назад
this was more true than funny.
@EricDec
@EricDec 5 лет назад
In a perfect world, this video wouldn't be in the category "Comedy". It would be in "Education".
@malcommeful
@malcommeful 5 лет назад
Totally agree with U.
@iWillWakeYouUp
@iWillWakeYouUp 4 года назад
Should be "Gaming"
@AlexandreG
@AlexandreG 2 года назад
True. This is exactly what we men would like to be the education for our girlfriends. But then, I got a little teenage sister, and damn, I cringe every time I think she might soon do any of this things to anyone. Idk if it's weird to be in a conflict like this or not. I mean, I'm perfectly fine with my girlfriend doing anything to me 😂
@dividedstatesofamerica2520
@dividedstatesofamerica2520 Год назад
@@AlexandreG Just remember your mother did the same.
@DM-jm2cx
@DM-jm2cx Год назад
Yup 😂
@hsk8787
@hsk8787 3 года назад
11 years later. This mans still making people laugh
@bulletprooftiger1879
@bulletprooftiger1879 2 года назад
Not Jada Smith though.
@linamartine7578
@linamartine7578 9 месяцев назад
​@@bulletprooftiger1879omg I spit on my tea😂😂😂😂😂😂😂
@elliotness9340
@elliotness9340 5 лет назад
Ladies if you ever wondered why your man can't leave his baby momma alone well Chris just explained it to you.
@Shoota5269
@Shoota5269 5 лет назад
Elliot Ness 👏🏾 “FACTS”👌🏾💯💯
@abbyallen1826
@abbyallen1826 5 лет назад
It means you got a bitch instead of a man.
@sisamusudroka3000
@sisamusudroka3000 5 лет назад
Lol somebody's man running back to his baby mama, i wonder who? ^^
@D1amond145
@D1amond145 5 лет назад
@@abbyallen1826 lol you probably get cheated on without even knowing it
@abbyallen1826
@abbyallen1826 5 лет назад
@@D1amond145 okay keep entertaining children then👋
@datguy9408
@datguy9408 5 лет назад
I had me a woman like that, I still miss getting that head that makes your soul leave your body 😢
@jeremyarroyo360
@jeremyarroyo360 4 года назад
Factz
@StevenLaneyGuitar
@StevenLaneyGuitar 3 года назад
You don't know what you've got 'til it's gone.
@bonyylast7147
@bonyylast7147 3 года назад
amen
@wadecohagan2388
@wadecohagan2388 3 года назад
where she at
@thrivin6312
@thrivin6312 2 года назад
fr bro I had this one puero rican chick that did ANYTHING.. I did her dirty and the bitch I got with didn't even do half the shit she did. Felt like a returned a BMW for a Kia
@kaukase539
@kaukase539 2 года назад
That Chris guy is the GOAT of Comedy
@rastheking
@rastheking 2 года назад
Naw the ZEBRA
@BlackOdds
@BlackOdds 5 лет назад
Lmaoo ain’t no such things as one time in sex if we like it it’s on the menu.
@curtistinemiller4646
@curtistinemiller4646 4 года назад
Ladies ,Your Man is Nastier than you could ever imagine.....LOL.
@unyieldingrage1389
@unyieldingrage1389 5 лет назад
3:00 very nice transition 👌🏾
@johnogunbayo5605
@johnogunbayo5605 4 года назад
Just because he came don’t mean you made him come. Spittin Factssss 💯
@Betroid
@Betroid 4 года назад
john ogunbayo forreal CAME TO MY SENSES
@S120-w2k
@S120-w2k 5 лет назад
If she swallows she's a keeper
@EricDec
@EricDec 5 лет назад
Every single word this man said is true.
@rebeccamccoy2346
@rebeccamccoy2346 2 года назад
I’ve seen this many times and I’m still laughing with tears in my eyes and nose running. Will….you hit the WRONG man.
@sashakrizinsky5473
@sashakrizinsky5473 3 года назад
This man ain't no comedian... He is a fucking philosopher....
@nadir1378
@nadir1378 4 года назад
This is so on point 😂😂😂. I watch a fair bit of standup comedy and must say that Chris Rock and Dave Chapelle are on a whole different level to anyone else out there
@briobrio6047
@briobrio6047 5 лет назад
0:55 he damn correct ......
@OmegaVideoGameGod
@OmegaVideoGameGod 4 года назад
1:00 "Since he was 12 years old" LMFAO
@kristinaniemeyer5256
@kristinaniemeyer5256 4 года назад
That black and white donkey I guess zebra was fun when my kids were young this is an escape from reality love every minute moment listening to Mr. Rock also love Eddie Murphy!!!
@delanoblanco2248
@delanoblanco2248 4 года назад
I love the "spitting scene" from "Madagascar" when he thought he was different😂
@mikejeezy06
@mikejeezy06 5 лет назад
Just DVr’d all his old stand ups, I’m finna to laugh my ass off tomorrow afternoon 😂
@jorgeanthony878
@jorgeanthony878 5 лет назад
That Ending line killed me
@robertjensen1048
@robertjensen1048 3 года назад
Rock gets it. He gets sexuality. He knows what both men and women and want, and he just tells it like it is. Both sexes would be wise to listen to this man.
@sindobrandnew
@sindobrandnew 5 лет назад
0:34 She's the one spoiled everybody.
@akshanshchoudhary7397
@akshanshchoudhary7397 5 лет назад
she’s the one that spoiled it for everybody.
@objectiveone1478
@objectiveone1478 5 лет назад
Chris is the coldest to come through the comedy game!
@dextercarrie8131
@dextercarrie8131 8 месяцев назад
This is actually my favourite Chris Rock comedy bit.
@coolchris478
@coolchris478 4 года назад
"You better get some bunk beds in this muthafuka"💯💯💯💯💯💯💯💯💯💯💯💯💯💯💯💯
@browneyesblackdragon
@browneyesblackdragon 5 лет назад
THIS MANS SHIRT CHANGED COLOR
@jsterlovesya
@jsterlovesya 5 лет назад
Afrika Funda Lol ikr!!!
@RRansomSmith
@RRansomSmith 4 года назад
2 different specials
@gerardevans2668
@gerardevans2668 4 года назад
3 different countries
@taiga1956
@taiga1956 4 года назад
The whole time I’m picturing Marty from Madagascar talking
@brennancarter7721
@brennancarter7721 3 года назад
I love Chris Rock, a true fucking genius.
@warehousethewoodman3908
@warehousethewoodman3908 5 лет назад
Christopher is a freak on the low...
@coolchris478
@coolchris478 4 года назад
All Christopher's are...💯
@austinkersey2445
@austinkersey2445 4 года назад
@@coolchris478 Christopher Lee?
@joshuaha7661
@joshuaha7661 3 года назад
Every man is. and Chris just told you he was so it ain't on the low lol
@MrMancid
@MrMancid Год назад
Always an amazing comedy by Chris Rock.
@thomasweeden2683
@thomasweeden2683 4 года назад
"Free at last, free at last!"
@leemichael2154
@leemichael2154 4 года назад
This is a very clever Man who knows about how men and women roll ! Go Chris!!!!
@kawaing100
@kawaing100 2 года назад
half the people gross out...half of them are in happy relationships
@Top10-i1x2m
@Top10-i1x2m 5 лет назад
Facts ! He should be a relationship mentor 😂
@thedieselguy
@thedieselguy 3 года назад
Yeah then the world would become a more calm relaxed and nice place to be
@furyshadow9517
@furyshadow9517 5 лет назад
Thanks for recommending this 9 years after release
@joshuawhitehead1016
@joshuawhitehead1016 3 года назад
Amen my brother, took the words right out of my mouth
@robsgarage552
@robsgarage552 5 лет назад
Well said and so true...
@berca6420
@berca6420 4 года назад
Nahhh
@ypmm53
@ypmm53 4 года назад
Chris has never been more accurate than this!!!
@Paco1337
@Paco1337 4 года назад
Now we have Lilly Singh...What happened to us
@mistertaz94
@mistertaz94 4 года назад
the snowflakes gained power and influence and ruined things for everyone
@alia.1041
@alia.1041 4 года назад
We have Tosh, don’t we?
@gianluigicalzoni2934
@gianluigicalzoni2934 10 лет назад
number one.. So true!
@findlay
@findlay Год назад
LOL….Genuine emotion at 3:00-3:20…”OHHHHH…..That felt so good I could read Arabic” 😂😂😂😂😂
@bulletprooftiger1879
@bulletprooftiger1879 2 года назад
So true. Before a girl swallowed my sauce I didn't care what they did. Now I expect them to swallow. If course this wouldn't be a deal breaker as I'm in casual relationships. But my future wife is gonna be pushing out and swallowing babies.
@-Me_
@-Me_ 5 лет назад
Not even a priest can preach this good
@mariaarredondo2563
@mariaarredondo2563 5 лет назад
“ you better call that ass like girl” 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣
@EndritVj
@EndritVj 4 года назад
It felt so good I could read arabic hahahaahah
@zacharygutshall8452
@zacharygutshall8452 2 года назад
Free at last!! Free at last!!!!
@SamuelHoskins
@SamuelHoskins Год назад
Everything he said is one thousand percent correct 😂😂😂😂💯💯💯💯💯
@23StudiosSports
@23StudiosSports 3 года назад
Free at last, free at last 🤣🤣
@classyassmothafucka8890
@classyassmothafucka8890 5 лет назад
Dear comment section Chris Rock was a thing long before Madagascar. Matter of fact, Marty the zebra isn't even the first animal he's voiced (Rodney the Guinnae Pig in Dr Dolittle) If the first thing you think of when you hear Chris Rock do stand-up comedy... is a talking animal... get off my RU-vid. Chris Rock is a top 10 (maybe top 5) stand-up comedian of all time. You SHOULD think of Chris Rock when you hear Marty the Zebra... not the other way around.
@jodregameandtalk
@jodregameandtalk 4 года назад
He is the best to me
@classyassmothafucka8890
@classyassmothafucka8890 4 года назад
@@jodregameandtalk He's up there for me He's on my mount rushmore George Carlin, Chris Rock, Dave Chappelle, and Louis C.K. Honorable mention to Jim Carey who was the best ON SCREEN comedian of all time
@sukhchainsingh1776
@sukhchainsingh1776 4 года назад
@@classyassmothafucka8890 how bout robin Williams
@globalautobahn1132
@globalautobahn1132 5 лет назад
This is He most truthful thing Chris Rock or any man has every said in publicly
@RJ-rp8yd
@RJ-rp8yd 3 года назад
One of the most truthful. He's stated many facts.
@jackies56tbird
@jackies56tbird 3 года назад
Poor Chris, he don't know THAT goes both ways
@anisaborakaj7492
@anisaborakaj7492 3 года назад
Lmfao facts
@N_Loco_Parenthesis
@N_Loco_Parenthesis 4 года назад
Level 2 is mayonnaise.
@MacStoker
@MacStoker 3 года назад
level 3?
@N_Loco_Parenthesis
@N_Loco_Parenthesis 8 месяцев назад
Hospital. @@MacStoker
@SubeeKarma
@SubeeKarma 4 года назад
Comedians single handedly keeping shure in business.
@alrune8
@alrune8 4 года назад
Chris Rock has this amazing ability to make women completely averse to men AND other women as well.
@SIMS4717
@SIMS4717 3 года назад
3:07 to 3:10 😂😂😂 OHHH AND THAT FACIAL EXPRESSION
@mattmarafino
@mattmarafino 5 лет назад
Is this stand up or a Ted talk
@thedieselguy
@thedieselguy 3 года назад
This is the gods truth spitting deciple
@ryan7228
@ryan7228 5 лет назад
...is he the voice for Marty in Madagascar? 😂😂😂
@smokyking6680
@smokyking6680 5 лет назад
Lol
@YXOF
@YXOF 5 лет назад
Either you're really young or so fucking late. . .
@ryan7228
@ryan7228 5 лет назад
I'm 23 haha
@smokyking6680
@smokyking6680 5 лет назад
@@YXOF Yee I just found out I'm not young
@jonasbrown1
@jonasbrown1 8 лет назад
It's got 69 likes. That makes me happy.
@jihyun1690
@jihyun1690 5 лет назад
Nice
@chipmanhunter
@chipmanhunter 5 лет назад
Nice
@God8-O
@God8-O 5 лет назад
Nice
@ItachiUchiha-jb4ns
@ItachiUchiha-jb4ns 4 года назад
Nice
@DarthInsomnis
@DarthInsomnis 4 года назад
I’ll aid you to getting to 420
@chess747
@chess747 5 лет назад
It’s funny, because it’s true.
@mellybethwel.4077
@mellybethwel.4077 5 лет назад
9 years ago Chris rock created memes
@emilyparr2747
@emilyparr2747 5 лет назад
All I hear is that zebra from Madagascar
@bearlyalive9669
@bearlyalive9669 5 лет назад
Now, Imagine a Zebra talking
@yobamos2158
@yobamos2158 3 года назад
that is just the goat of stand up comedy
@ss032010310103
@ss032010310103 Год назад
Spitting facts lmao
@bobharris5093
@bobharris5093 3 года назад
2021 and still so fking true on every beat ladies.
@DebbiesSanctuary49
@DebbiesSanctuary49 3 года назад
He made a perfect case for not having sex before marriage. You bring all those expectations of those ex's into the marriage bed with you. I heard that before, but this crude message just nailed it down. it makes perfect sense. Too much pressure on everyone. LOL! Bet Chris never thought of this feed back!!!
@msnikke1
@msnikke1 11 лет назад
How could you Marty?
@jr42a1
@jr42a1 2 года назад
Although im not married, Chris should be a marriage counselor.I hear it all the time from guys who are...
@Tryptick
@Tryptick Месяц назад
Thank you Chris Rock for speaking the truth so we don't have to
@consciousbeing1188
@consciousbeing1188 3 года назад
NEVER underestimate the power a woman who tosses a good salad can have over a man.
@ingridredfern5065
@ingridredfern5065 Год назад
Yep he,s spot on 👌
@stoneesoj3055
@stoneesoj3055 4 года назад
Written in stone once it’s on the menu 😹 5Ever baby
@starrwilliams0127
@starrwilliams0127 4 года назад
MARTY!!!!!!!!! 🗣 lol 🦓
@jr5389
@jr5389 Год назад
Unbelievably Great 🎉👌🏴󠁧󠁢󠁳󠁣󠁴󠁿😎
@neenyboy55yt9
@neenyboy55yt9 2 года назад
The truth is always funny chris rock tells it like it is
@htw.015
@htw.015 5 лет назад
Just starting running for fucking president I’m not joking.
@dustinaustin3670
@dustinaustin3670 2 года назад
If you're a true old school Chris rock fan , you wouldn't be thinking about madgascar. No offense love him being the zebra. Okay like Eddie Murphy as the dragon in Mulan
@derrickdavis5836
@derrickdavis5836 4 года назад
So to be a comedian you have to just tell the truth that everybody is afraid to admit
@mosthated.e.2422
@mosthated.e.2422 2 года назад
In a funny way
@moeynola6747
@moeynola6747 3 года назад
He right 😂😂😂 get mad at our Ex girlfriends 😂
@danellboy5757
@danellboy5757 4 года назад
The guy's a genius 🙌🏽
@diningroomfish5470
@diningroomfish5470 3 года назад
Why because he said something everyone knows
@johnnesmith246
@johnnesmith246 2 года назад
That funny as hell. 🤣
@earthman4222
@earthman4222 5 лет назад
You said it.
@BlakeGibbons
@BlakeGibbons 2 года назад
God damn it that hit straight home🤣😂
@sadrakarugendo2544
@sadrakarugendo2544 3 года назад
Level 2 and 3 be needs to go to the bathroom all night 🚽😂😂🤣🤣
@sazti
@sazti 5 лет назад
Hahaha I hit the mirror on the dresser from the bed
@1shogunate696
@1shogunate696 2 года назад
That part about deciphering the da vinci code is true. But she proceeded to the bathroom to spit it out. She was a quitter, said it tasted spicy.
@pinkxxberry4891
@pinkxxberry4891 5 лет назад
this video spit in my face
@feisalalykhan8403
@feisalalykhan8403 2 года назад
CR rocks!
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