my straight best friend, whom I love to pieces, once tried to tell me, a queer person, I couldn't use the word queer :P like look sweetie I know your heart is in the right place but it's different when straight people use it, when queer people do it's about reclaiming a word that was used to hurt us
Shipping bugs me because more often than not it seems to have nothing to do with the dynamic between characters and it just just ship by association. Like, what kind of standards must you have for love if your idea of a relationship includes standing in the same room? Worse is shipping real people together, as if they don’t have lives outside of what we see on screens, partners of their own, or any sort of agency. They aren’t characters, stop it.
I'm gonna be honest, I miss the old shipping I'm a shipper, sometimes I'm not proud of it because of the new wave of shippers are just gross people who ship real and fake people just because they breathe the same air and they don't care no matter how much you try to reason with them
My standard for love is pretty high. Shipping in certain fandoms is good because the characters have actual dynamics between them. Take the Fanders for example. Many people ship Virgil and Roman because they used to hate each other but Roman develops respect for Virgil and eventually grows to be his friend. It’s developed, and the characters have worked on developing a better relationship with each other. Meaning shipping them is acceptable and makes sense.
Professor Quack I really agree with that you shouldn't ship real ppl it's kinda gross, although when I ship characters I just care about if they would fit together and not their dynamic in canon.
I only ship real people ik (and fictionalcharacters), like if two of my friends seem to have something there I would ship them. I dont do it with real people who I have not met (celebrities), I find it creepy since they are real people.
@@NicholasBlack I feel the same way! A lot of my friends are part of the community in some way, so I would rather they feel comfortable around me than be offended by something I did or said, you know? :)
holy shit I've been wanting to complain about this for three weeks but I was hanging out with a friend of mine who's bisexual, (she's was dating a girl during this too) but we saw two guys who where clearly in a relationship, ya' know holding hands and being flirty, and I was just like "oh that's cute" but she just straight up says "that's fucking hot." and I swear I just wanted to both slap her and cry because of how unconformable that made me. but I didn't do shit out of hopeful fear that she was joking :,)
Nick: I guess you're not a stan what are you doing here? Me: I don't know but this is so much fun! * eats pop corn * Also i love your videos! They're the best!
I SPACED OUT FOR A SECOND ABOUT A MINUTE IN AND WAS BROUGHT BACK TO REALITY BY NICHOLAS JUST VIOLENTLY YELLING "IM GAYYYYYY" AND I WOULDN'T HAVE IT ANY OTHER WAY.
dude i hate that sooooo much. Like as a history buff and a music kid i love hamilton because of the history and the great music but like kids be out here shipping long-dead people and ignoring like actual marriages and stuff ya know
My issue that was addressed in this series is common; fan fiction and daydreaming. It’s mainly for fictional characters though (x reader fics, no gay fetish). I don’t know, real people in fanfics aren’t my thing. Something about it is dull or uninteresting, plus it’s not right. Maybe I find fictional characters more likable, which is.. pretty depressing, step up your game real people. I do daydream for my actual crushes though, so I can work on that. I’ve tried reading fan fiction for another RU-vidr I liked at some point, but it was poorly written so I forgot about it. If I’m reading fan fiction it has to be worth reading. And yes, I am young so thanks for planting the seed early, when the seed grows into a full grown cactus I will name it Ellen.
Ellen should be made into an entirely separate plant species and be put into herbology. Ellen is god. God is a woman who? God is a p l a n t , change my mind.
Like people who grew up in a Hispanic family, you can make spanish jokes, but if you heard someone say something without knowing what it is then it becomes a problem.
I honestly kept laughing/giggling throughout this whole video, not because I found these issues to be funny or anything, but because it's so true and I'm just so happy that someone is addressing these problems where so many people can see/hear them. Because honestly, it is getting so creepy and just NEEDS to STOP. I'm getting scared to go on fanfic reading sites at this point. 😅 So thank you a lot for this hun! 💖😊😁
I have now binge watched a lot of your videos and I have to say you have made me think about things and other times yell "PREACH!" I am genuinely curious what your MBTI is. I do want to say that how clear, intelligent, honest, and blunt you are is rare to come by (at least the ones that can catch and keep my attention) Have you ever thought of being a therapist? Just saying you have qualities of a great therapist.
@@NicholasBlack that is very interesting that you are an INTJ but it does make sense; It's apparent because of some the characteristics you show and the way you explain your thoughts. I could definitely see therapy as something that you would excel in but I'm sure you will shine no matter what you do.
I'm looking back on some of my behaviors and honestly I'm kinda ashamed. It's interesting that I kept putting off these videos for a while because I already knew that things I did was problematic and I was worried for being called out. There's so much stuff that you hide in your mind just so you can life without guilt. I was afraid of changing myself, but you have to to go become a better person. As you said, the first step is at least to plant the seed in your mind. It may take a while, and I may go back into problematic things sometimes, but eventually I will get out of this mindset. Thanks for making these videos and pushing me towards being a better person.
@@gracer51 i know right i need help again I'm going back and forth from the closest because i originally came out as bisexual but then realized it was more than that so i had to figure it out all over again but right when i thing i found something it gets complicated again
Lol same but for me with my gender I’m just comfortable with all the pronouns, but I also prefer he/him pronouns but I’m rather feminine but when I look in the mirror I’m flat-chested, with a boy hair cut and my jawline is sharp?? Help??
The only disagreement I have to this is I'm ace and I still enjoy reading romance stories of all types of couples. To say I, an ace person, would be fetishising that couple would be bs, so yeah... But yeah, I 1000% agree that the people who ship people who don't actually show any romantic involvement are probably fetishising. AND YOU MENTIONED THAT MEN CAN JUST BE FRIENDS YAAASSSS!
When u were talking about the gay jokes, its like if a white person were to say, haha im so black. That would be very racist. Because they are not black. You cant make fun of a kind of human if ur not that kind of human, because its offensive. So yea I agree with u.
Haha, i remember reading like,, twenty one pilots/ dan and phil fanfiction and projecting so hard. I stopped because i felt too much like a creepy straight girl but it turns out i was just a creepy trans guy. Not that that like makes it better at all but it makes it make more sense maybe in a way? I just read dumb romance novels to fill that hole now and honestly it's a lot better. I remember i was watching this live stream a few years ago and the youtuber was saying how real person shipping was really creepy and gross and i remember feeling super defensive but then realizing i had no rational arguments to actually fall on. I guess part of it was maturity that i didn't have when i was 12 but i think more so i was just hungry for queer media that i didn't have, so i drew/wrote it myself. I don't feel faultless i guess is what i'm saying but i feel like i shipped real people for a different reason than most.
My poor thirteen year old ass had to read so much gay guy fanfic cause I couldn’t find any good fic anywhere else. DO YOU KNOW HOW HARD I LOOKED FOR LESBIAN FIC?? It all sucks man. Ugh you’re right about everything btw
People probably are like: "Shipping is just people thinking they'd be a cute couple" NO KAREN YOU DON'T MAKE CREEPY LARRY SMUT OF PEOPLE WHO YOU THINK WOULD BE A GREAT COUPLE
You're bashing me and I agree. I love shipping gay , straight and every other pairing. I love it. But, I only do fictional characters. I still feel bad about slash and smut of fictional characters. I'm pansexual by the way. I love. Exploring relationship dynamics and junk.
Jamese Galen then you’re definitely not part of the problem. I don’t think there’s any shame in writing fanfiction about fictional characters, whereas RPF is very morally grey and creepy, as he said. But I agree, I dislike that in most fandoms, the only popular pairings are M/M ships. But as a bisexual female, I really want to see het and F/F ships written about. But because of fetishization, they don’t really exist.
Not to argue with your points, I just want to point out it's absolutely no surprise majority of ships are m/m. Comparing the number of complex male characters and complex relationships (any form, platonic, enemies, romantic, whatever) between men to the number of complex female characters and complex relationships between women in media, it is logical that most fans would be more intrigued by more m/m relationships than f/m or f/f. But yeah, there is a problem with shipping in fandom culture, especially with real people. (Not even getting into racism, Exibit A: the newer Star Wars movies and their popular ships.)
I agree with everything, except if it's just about fictional characters. In that case I think everyone should be allowed to do whatever they want with their fantasies of people that literally don't exist. Shipping, smut, fanfiction, role-playing, etc, there's nothing wrong with that when it only involves fictional characters. If it does envolve real people it's not acceptable.
tbh as somebody who consumes fanfiction of ships that arent "2 men breathe in a room" but actually have a dynamic like so many women just write like romance and porn of MLM ships and its really fucked with my head tbh because i read fanfiction for fun and just enjoying dynamics (even platonic) and theyre just fetishizing shit all the time lol
That moment when you’re aro/ace and not sure if you should feel called out or not. I mean. I’m a shipper. But most of the time I’m like, tHe FrIeNdShIpS tHoUgH! 🤷
I'm very sad because I love to joke like this but I don't want to anger other gays so sometimes a "Haha, GAY" slips out and heads turn and I'm like "sdfedbfgdfdawait no it was a joke I'm sorry here look here's my bisexual flag that I drew on my arm with eyeshadow I'm sorryadxsjlagfcv"
I only ship stuff that’s confirmed to some degree and it’s usually as a joke. I love showing my straight friends 90’s Ren and Stimpy only for them to slowly piece together the innuendos like ”Why tf are they under a mistlet- Ooohh....”
I just wish it wasn't so prevalent, like 65% of HP fanfiction is drarry and a lot of them are really poorly done. If only there was more variety... (I also ship Harry/Luna so I'm annoyed that there's not a lot of that ship)
Honestly, I'm a multi shipper because I see the way people could be together. But its kinda upsetting that there's so much Drarry, and not enough of anything else.
I’m so proud of you for informing ‘the youngins’ but also the older gens too be this is important and it’s nice to see someone who cares. I’m straight which doesn’t matter but still, I hope this helps a lot of people out bc people suck. They just do. It’d be cool to see someone like you help change that.
7:21 oh bitch, I can't relate on so many levels and me having Wattpad account makes it so much worse because every recommendation I get has skin ships in them now....the one time I tried reading one, I came out with all hope in humanity lost
I think there is a difference between two kinds of people who ship The one I find unproblematic is, If for example they here about a rumour that star a is dating star b and they are like: "oh they would be cute together, I would ship it" but if it's not true it's fine And the hard-core shipper, that is like: " only theses two can go together, even if they say it's not true and/or that they aren't even attracted to that gender, they are just forced to say that it's a lie and if they are dating someone else than my ship I will hate there partners." This ist just no. Don't do that.
THANK 👏🏽 YOU 👏🏽 Somebody needed to say it! I’ve been in fandoms for as long as I can remember, and most of the characters are boys. And... all of a sudden everyone is GAY. And people I’ve met just wanna rp or write just to imagine these two in a sexual situation. (This is for fictional stuff) I don’t get a lot of the ships in the fandom because they hardly even talked or literally hate each other. All a character has to do is breathe or show affection towards their friend or someone and all of a sudden they’re...shipped? Two characters could be besties, hold hands, hug each other and just be supportive. And then all of a sudden both of those boys are gay?? Sure, I think that stuff is cute, because they’re FRIENDS. It’s sweet. I do the same with my friends. It’s just so odd. I’ll ship it if it’s cannon and they’re actually together in the show or just in general. Because that makes sense. But like thanks for addressing this, the world needed this.
I write fan fiction, but it’s all just fiction because I also found shipping real people weird. I think most of my ships are gay men is because strait couples in fiction usually don’t have enough genuine love and development ( example: Ginny and Harry ). Whereas destiel and drarry ( my main ships) have genuine love even if it’s problematic ( drarry). I don’t write smut as much unless it’s requested because I’m on the asexual spectrum, so a lot of the time it looks like people are only interested if it’s gay guys but that just happens to be what happens since they are seen as “friends” when they are obviously more that just that, and I’m not talking just romantic. Btw I get that some people do this.
I mean, I just ship what I think would look cool... I'm a multi shipper... I'd never ship two real people together and I only ship what is reasonable though. I'm now kinda scared to be shat on for shipping fictional characters... Like, i ship KiriBaku (Kirishima and Bakugo from the Anime Boku No Hero Academia) , not because they're both guys, but because I think they'd make a good couple because of their dynamic. I've also roleplayed a few odd pairings... These were Monoma x Kirishima and Monoma x Tsuyu and Monoma x Koda (all from bnha) How the MonoxKiri started was a complete accident but the roleplay was fun! The second, me and my friend couldn't decide on what to rp so we decided to go with our anons and a Koda anon just messaged me and I was like "Okay, I guess I'll just go with it." I don't do smut though because I'm 14. I'm unsure if this would count as fetishising and I really do apologise if this is the case...
Well I just watched the first part and I go to a cosplay meet up thing and there are also alot of k pop Stan's there and there is this thing that the girls and the gays are like flocking every Asian looking dude and it's honestly creepy(eventho some of the guys are like using the girls) it's just a very weird phenomenon. (Also someone started kind of sound sexual things for drugs but that's a whole other stories
I love how those videos aren't that much about a stan coulture actually but psychology, people and their behaviour, etc. Also, I'm queer girl. Yes, just queer. Because none of the labels describes me perfectly BUT it's still valid. I'm still valid. And I can have a conversation about what the term "queer" means in my case but be prepared for very long conversation. Also you have to be willing to listen and at least TRY to understand. Thanks (Btw, by saying "you" I refer to everyone a.k.a. to the person who is reading this. I hope you got that)
Ivy LaVender I don’t want to argue, and I know I sound stupid BUT I don’t have a very clear understanding about what queer mean. I know it means when labels don’t fit well, but I would like to have a better understanding. If you are busy you don’t have to
Right on point! And when I saw the skinships, it was obvious the idols were acting all gay and intimate (some of them didn’t even want to engage) for cloutification, but of course the straight female stans are delusional enough to believe in it🙄
I also hate when people ship two members from a boy group but the moment there is some implications of them actually being gay or an idol being lgbtq+ they’re like “ewww no wtf 🤢🤮”
PREACH!! Thank you so FrEAkInG much for saying all this, especially to the twelve year old straight girls. It makes me so proud for the gays to see someone standing up for the people. Ty❤️🙏 -Saoirse A.F
I’m a bisexual girl and I once had someone tell me that I’m not bisexual because that isn’t a thing and your ether gay or straight. I swear I nearly lost my shit, saying that I wouldn’t use the word ‘gay’ because I’m attracted to both genders. I do use gay as a collective term as well though And can I also add that I’m not one of those girls that sexualise gay men, cause that’s horrible
Top five only calm gay Fandoms 1. Bunheads (Kim Petras fandom) 2. Little Fucking Bitches (SOPHIE fandom) 3. Dorian Electra (we don't have a name yet) 4. X's (Allie X fandom) 5. King Princess Fandom
The only ships I ship, are canon ships Unlike my friends I can just say something like "Your going to into this" And they'll yell at me "Shut up! I can ship what I want to bitch!" And I'm like "Bitch. YOU LITERALLY HAVE AN OBSESSION WITH IT!!!"
Oh my God thank you, I am sick if this too cause its like "no you killed my OTP" its all communities if the Relationship is can only based rather Heterosexual or Homosexual it gets overdone and boring... Like I will admit I've done it too but now Shipping/Romantic Love makes no sense to me unless it comes naturally rather then by force. I seen a lot of shit...RPing I do... But I don't write Smut-Fics or draw sex....
As a straight girl I apologize. The amount of times people have said “that’s gay” or “I want a gay best friend” is sickening. Gay people are PEOPLE. They aren’t just gay.
I took this critique waaaaay to personally and now I realize what an idiot I am. Buy the I realize that I am a fucking NONBINARY BISEXUAL LIKE WTF BRAIN
I only ship real people if: 1. I know their in an actual relationship already. I'm not even really shipping them- I 'ship' irl people as a joke. So like say my friend says she has a crush on someone I'll jokingly go "OooOoo I shiiip iiiit"
You did make some really good points in your last stan culture video, but I don't see the problem with writing romance/smut fics or fantacising about fictional characters. It can get a little extreme, but even then - it's not hurting anyone so why not?
Sunshine Girl Art if you’re fetishizing a group of people it’s bad. Even if they’re fictional, if you’re using your fictional characters to fetishize gay people, that’s extremely creepy. Gay people are not porn.
Sunshine Girl Art well, I mean, that’s the only reason I brought up the fictional world in the first place, is because of fetishization. As long as it’s not fetishization I don’t care.
I’m irked because I tend to lean to m/m fics because it’s WAY easier to find fics where the characters have friendships and relationships, not just slash. Though honestly it’s easier to just search for x characters as family or just x tags where a character is a specific neurodivergent.
What does local mean? /gen I don't really use Twitter for anything and I think it's like a sort of Twitter way of saying "normie" or "mainstream" but I can't really be sure. (I don't use the term "normie" myself, that's just there for reference.)
If I hear any straight white girl throwing a fit like " OMG HARRY POTTER IS JUST A BOTTOM AND DRACO MALFOY IS A TOP UWU " I'll throw myself off the window. ( also this is a random ship , I didn't want to use real people for this )
@@call_me_anarkiddie8134 I never said you in particular had but if you're hating on a girl in a show/movie/book just bc she's a girl then you should check yourself ( again i'm generalising here ). Also why would you be fetishised ?
3:45 its like the Deku and Bakugo ships. They are rivals. Deku has a crush on a girl. Bakugo hates Deku. I'm not a fan of ships unless they are cannon, so I totally agree when u said ships are creepy! Fun fact: Most people cannot tell if 2 people are having a friendly conversation or are flirting. There were scientific experiments. Oof when u said uwu it triggered me because my sister will say it all the time to be ironic or something and she'll write owo on my homework and stuff.
We men fetishise lesbians every once in a while. But these women immediately fetishise two guys chilling in a hot tub that's sitting 5' apart just because they coexist in the same space ALL THE TIME
OK I THOUGHT ABOUT THIS TGE OTHER DAY AND I'M GONNA COMMENT IT HERE CUZ I THINK YOU'LL APPRECIATE IT: BROKE: Gay people are cuddlier because they're gay WOKE: Gay people can be cuddly or not and it doesnt depend on their sexuality in the least, just the same with bis or straights or whatever, and their entire being doesnt revolve around their being Gay *HYPER* WOKE: Gay people are cuddlier with each other because they're Gay, but not in a sexual or romantic sense, theyre cuddlier because as Gays they already face enough prejudiced for being Gay that the prejudice that usually keeps people from releasing their desire for skin contact and cuddles doesnt even effect them, and they dont give a shit what people think and cuddle because they fucking want to. So, yes, indirectly perhaps, Gays are cuddlier because theyre Gay.
I had a friend who used to be a fujoshi and o h g o d I got so uncomfortable when she started talking about the gay. I got really conflicted because like, sweetie, I love you, but please stOP. I was so relieved when she and a couple other friends outgrew their fujoshi stage. BUT GUESS WHAT Now I have MORE friends that fujoshis and stans. I cannot win. I mean, they are usually really tame and I only see it come out when they talk to each other about k-pop or something, but I do have one friend who constantly talks about the gay fanfiction she reads and I am s t r e s s e d. Big problem about this big problem is that I cannot tell when my friends are seeking representation or just fetishizing since most of my friends are in the lgbt community (mainly bi). Though, I suppose for some of them it shouldn't matter since the way they talk about the gay fanfics or comics they read is gross, no matter the situation.
There’s this one dude in my class that likes to talk about how he likes girls that like girls and would always look at me, since he knows I’m bisexual. Also, my ex told me that me being bisexual was one of the things that he liked about me. Not only that, but he told me that he didn’t see the point of having a pride and black history month, calling it stupid even after I tried explaining the reason for it.
