Steven Seagal: Bullshido Master 

😂😂😂😂Underrated comment

He does know lots of different styles. Karate and some form of Chinese martial arts. Not just Aikido.

Your comment reminds me of Mike Epps as Charles Ramsey, "I know a lot of big words. Police Department!" 😂

Legendary Comment! 😂

Hahahahaaaaaa of all the smart ass comments you had me rolling on the floor. Nice one Jase 7:16

That was so good 🤣

@@DismantleHAARP RIP JEFF!!!!

@@DismantleHAARP Indeed! You too.

EGO

When he showed up during Katrina in riot gear, I knew right then he was legit.

It would be a horrific joke since he was a consultant/training of many police departments around the US, and boy, those guys were trained so badly that it makes 12 y/o playing airsoft look like a British SAS mission in comparison

Putting Andy Kaufman to shame!

@@aminmian7291 He was a consultant to the Biden White House for their Afghanistan withdraw.

What makes you think he isn't?

What if Steven Seagal is actually Andy Kaufman?

other half was sleeping..

@@words4dyslexiconyeah it was 9hr flight and a Seven Seagal movie marathon so...

That's hilarious! Love it!

great joke!

this comment is super underrated my friend.

Nice one 😀

Hahaha

I was trying to think of a comment about the hair and after reading yours I surrender. Lmao.

Modern science can do wonders. . LOL. Black shoe polish doesn't hurt either. Right , Stevie, ya little rascal. Pretty cool how all his "opponents " just fall down when he touches them and some before . Great choreography , Stevie. Keep on truckin. Next clip, just wear your speedo so you can show us your svelte hourglass figure with your rock hard 6-pack abs and robust derriere.

one of the most closely guarded secret's of sensai seagulls

At least he's consistent. The guy's a winner.

A God without any worshippers

Well put!!!😅😅😅 I can't knock him too much I was enjoying doing bad technique half ass moves on my willing buddies as a young teen lol and no..not his predator antics😂 I much preferred doing some "van damage "

Steven Seagal is......A Man With No Diet.

But today. Right now would you square off with him in a crowded corner office. No. That fat old man would put you through the desk. Funny huh?

Hahahaha

Oh man, ...thats funny!😅

A parody of himself.

Steven Seagal stars as Steve Seagal in "Steve Seagal", coming soon straight to VHS.

This is strangely, so accurate

executive decisions one of the actors got attacked by Steven and when someone being 6'4/6'5, manages to sneak upon you then it's silly to say that Steven Seagal is a phony a person that tall shouldn't be able to suprise someone with a quick move

Me too. I've been binging on SpaceIce Seagal vids. If you haven't seen them, PLEASE do. I've legit peed myself laughing.

@@feraltaco4783based on your recommendation I watched some of these videos. You’re right. You do piss yourself. I always thought that guy was an idiot

Bruh

Lol

STOOOOPPPPP 😂😂

He Is a donut

😂😂😂🤣🤣🤣

Seriously, I am 5 minutes into listening this Seagal bullshit marathon and I just have to stop and let my mind rest.... it's fucking exhausting.

One thing he said you have to be able to punch before you can fight! Unfortunately he cannot punch , but he can sure talk alot and well talk alot all the way to the Bank!!.

Dude needs his own Sarah McLachlan fundraiser, he's earned it.

​@@markbaker4708seagal is lethally deadly in real life. He made some historic movies and then holly wood cancelled him. It doesn't stop his credibility. Believe me some of the toughest guys out there tried to expose him, but when it was face to face they said nothing. Maybe his hits aren't as good as they once were, but he's truly deadly

Nice video bro got my follow fr..

No director did..

I went to Seagals house in Northern California when I was fourteen because my friends dad was the builder. This was at the height of his career in the 90’s. I was awww struck to meet a movie star but in retrospect, he was an absolute d-bag. He literally just complimented himself for the half hour I spent with him. Literally, non stop, about how big of a star he is and how he personally saved the action movie genre while simultaneously insinuating that he created Akido and he was working undercover for the government to take down the mob and that’s why he was getting back to nature. Absolute DONKEY!

The catering truck yelled "STOP!" but Seagal just kept eating😂

Every time he was given a role. Eventually, all the characters starting fighting for dominance in his head. And they still are, even to this day. Lol

@@Sylas-oi4oo All I read was "I went to Seagals house" and could think only: You are truly blessed. 🤣🤣

In the Netherlands Mongolian is of course a tribe near China (Djengis Khan). The word is also being used by the medical proffesion for the so called " Down Syndrome". One who sucks is named a mongol in the Netherlands. Thus we find that Segal is just a mongol indeed.

😂😂😂😂

Ya nailed that one , pard. Ya gotta be some kinda psychic.

Taught martial arts in the kitchen specifically

🎯😂

😂😂

The best film Steven Segal ever made is almost every film he wasn't in.

Steven Seagal: Bullshito Master.......The most interesting man of ever!

Based on a True Story!

Check out the Corridor Crew movie with him.

Bulshidoo story🗿

Not just Steven himself but also the reporters/interviewers 😊 and Steven's combat partners... Keeping professional in the most hysterical of times: pure professionalism (except Steven, he's just full of BS!). 😂

@@RaverOperatorGeeza thats what the original comment says lol

Well back then people believe them there was no Internet research to be done. You kinda had to take them out his word.

Not when you fully believe your own Bullshido .

I would like to see him fight Tank Abott.

​@@laforce36 He would get beaten by an average Joe that can make a fist.

Lmao I literally thought the same thing when I saw that. It's too funny it's gotta be the world's best troll of all time! Lol

He must not of known how to throw a punch if it took two whole years to learn how to punch LOL

That's because he couldn't learn to punch.

Bertie Bassett. Licorice Allsorts.

He should also add to his 'lifestory' that he was born in the glove compartment box of a '59 Chevy & came out Kickin' & Screamin' while chewing his billical cord and his great great great Grandfather was Fu Manchu and thát's where he got his 'skills' through that bloodline. 🤣😂🤣😂😅

You missed the "Italian" part

@@shadowlesswarrior fixed it

he lives in the same apartment as me lmao

Than himself....

He's an absolute legend! Just ask him, he'll tell ya.

@@fzaman1980 pfffffffff

From laughter

My girlfriend lives in Niagara Falls, you wouldn't know her bro.

@@sterlingarcher1962Under the waterfall , right? Yeah i know her.

@@vz1270 LOL

Steven Segal is just like Joe Biden. Make up every story as you go along.

This short film documents Steven Seagals ability to regrow his own hair better than any study on the man thus far.

Of an overt narcissist

Facts.

Insecurity I would call it more than anything

@@blippitybloo That's what narcissism is, at its root. They need a delusional self-image supported by people they manipulate precisely because they're too avoidant of the pathetic and vulnerable truth about themselves.

GOT THAT RIGHT

No way Dude, I saw this Comment before I finished the Video. Damn, I griefed myself...

Segal is and was fake. Yes he can do aikido/ aikijutsu. But his reputation was all build up and not even half of this was true.😂

Wow, I'm at the end of the video now. Wow.

@@patrickgassner7725 The only thing Seagal can destroy is a free buffet

​@@johnreidy2804 Way to ruin the video 😭😭😭

He is the spectrum.

Nah, he's just a narcissist.

if by spectrum you mean authismn, he definately is not. Might be having other psychological anomalies thou. Or just a scumbag.

​@@DoomyMacDoomface So people on the Spectrum can't be narcissists? He can be both.

@@DynamicUnoTea @MoonstarVillage if you mean autistic spectrum, it is unlikely. Statistically, autistic people tend to not lie, tend to have low self-esteem as well as care extraordinarily little about making connections with people around, leave alone desire for adoration or seek for power. He's a psychopath and a narcissist. These disorders extremely rarely combine with ASD and usually when they combine, it is a result of misdiagnosis.

You didn't end your comment............April fools! Lol

Lmao spray paint.

Duche seagull lol

​@@sidneygriffiths5737 he wasn't joking

I think it's just glued on hair, looks like a carpet

😂👍🏼 that's a great comment

Seriously. It’s like the Truman show but Truman doesn’t want to leave.

😂

he plays the role of the egocentric douchebag perfectly

He had a blast.

his real name is stevie Seal, in a movie he was a Special Cook Forced to fix Mohaw food cause that would be more healthy then USA hot dog or hamburger.

This comment needs more likes 😂

Classic mate

Such original jokes. I remember when I first laughed at these in 2005.

Was the Navy cook in the movie "Under Cheese".

That’s crazy

That's bullshido 😉

​​@@aymonfoxc1442 he's definitely earned his blackbelt in that discipline! 😂😂😂

He has some Italian in him alright. Changing sides, opinions or whatever in any given moment.

He’s a black italian Native American Russian mongol (and who knows what else I forgot) from Michigan OC , CA and lived in Japan for awhile (he’s a deadbeat dad) of course this could all be a CIA cover because he claims that too , he likes Eastern Europe which makes sense as he’s thought to give $ to human trafficking, he thinks he’s tough but I’ve never seen proof of that I love his movies though first 5 actually fun after that ego / direct to dvd takes over but my god he’s part walrus

"A hawk named Mo" 😂😂😂

Booooo 👎🏾

​@@MenteMaestra91come with your real id Steven 🤣

@@RR_theproahole the fck you gonna do?

Bwaaaaahaaaaa

What he meant was "I was born Claire Voyant," famous French cross dresser with impossible hairline and story.

also martial arts as a BABY🍼

​@@fredschwartz5172 😂😂😂

i loved how he also felt necessary to include in his cop tv series intro him saying "you might have not known this, but for the past 20 years, ive been a cop" this is what happens when nobody ever calls you out on your bullshit, you start living your own fantasies, and might even start to believe them to be true instead of just lying to keep up appearances. guys so far gone though, that im pretty sure hes like mentally ill with delusions etc.

Impossible. 😂

8:22 damn 😮

Think like molasses. Stout like Guinness.

🤣🤣🤣🤣

That's Emperor Ming's Helmet-

Gonna bite Joesph Vincent’s tagline line tha?! Lol

@@KingCuba Jesus Christ is it really THAT big a deal that someone repeats what someone else said online at some point? Or should he be taken out back and shot for daring to say what someone else has already said..? 🤦🏽‍♂️

Can't believe how fast he has got to 400k sunscribers!

This is an excellently produced video n the comments are friggin hilarious.

he has nothing on Steven though - this man has dueled with Putin

@@divest2099yeah dueling a miniature human is quite the feat…

😒 😒😒 Steven seagal Is just like Frank dux Both are masters of Tall Tales

Why ruin it You could have been a part of it

@@yoshimitsu8643 I don't like Theatrical Fighting

wtf are you taling about?

Think about how many years Steven has put into being the laughing stock of the martial arts community across the world.

Ok, damn, one of the funniest comments I've read in a while. Thanks!

My mother’s cousin was a stunt double for Stephan Segal. Anyone with an orange belt or higher could kick Stephan’s ass even back in the 90s.

"It's not a lie, if YOU believe it..." -George Costanza

Bullshido indeed 🤣

😂😂😂

I’m gonna start using that one.

It was the "Fugawi" tribe. Got lost and asked "where the fugg are we"

😂😂😂😂

Hormuz

@@dontbuyanything4729 Is that tribe related to the Hukawi tribe of F-troop ?

Lego hair ffs 🤣🤣🤣

..yes yes.. ok ok.. i'm also very emotionally jealous about St.Even's undebatably legit & heavenly grown Lego blessed hair (a fully detailed description is limitless & beyond the endlessness of space itself.. okay.. so deal with it..)..👀💫 but.. let's not forget to mention the blindingly stunning run of "Haircules" himself okay..😅🤧 during which his hairline passes into a 4th dimensional state.. thus making it unexplainably invisible to the human eye..😐😑

lol yeah it looks like his hair is a thin metal cap

Ever since he beat that male-pattern baldness diagnoses, his hair has grown in rather sharp looking.

His hair is obviously fake. check 9:37. His balding was already quite advanced at such a young age.

Master Segal was teaching Poatan how to strike recently. While there he explained how Anderson Silva and Lyoto Machida owe their careers to him. -" You should do a crane kick." He told Lyoto -" Wow, even do my family owns a karate dojo and that being one of the signature kicks of the discipline it had never occurred to do that before, thanks" Lyoto replied.

hey, don't disrespect sensei seagal - he taught anderson silva how to do a front kick. he broke it down for him; "imagine a kick, now imagine the front, put it together, front kick."

He's been doing it recently with alex perriera too 😂😂😂

I'm old enough to have enjoyed his prime era movies as they came out which is why I remain a fan despite his current day status.

@@T_da_yung_goat that sound like trump

Under Steven Seagal’s beard is another lie.

one time Steven Segal walked into a room full of people...only Steven Seagal was the one leaving on a hospital gurney.

There are a fair amount, it turns out. My favorites: Steven Segal wakes up everyone in his house just to tell them that he's going to sleep. Steven Segal always mutters threats at vending machines when he's buying something.

Classic! They'll be called Steven Seagal Actualities.

Steven Seagal once challenged Lance Armstrong to a testicle counting contest. Seagal lost by one.

He got paid and it worked. Have you not seen Tiktok there are millions of Seagals out there now

@@SpaceRanger187 Not a chance! He's one in 8 billion!

The power of the mind is real. I once heard of this guy who locked himself in a freezer that wasn't plugged in. They found him froze to death. His mind convinced him that he was inside a working freezer and bro froze to death. Swear man. That shit is real. I'm in hiding because my mind has convinced me that Segal is going to kick my ass for speaking too many truths. It's dangerous to be too honest sometimes, plus nobody likes a snitch.

That's his next movie. "Steven Seagal is... DELUSIONALLY LETHAL"

Yes. And never get white.

Say he lives to be 100, will he still wear that ridiculous rug?

All natural! Good dna! Dont bejelous lol

@@suzbone I don't know, but the shape of it sure looks like a slice of pizza stuck to his forehead.

That is the best hair joke I've read. Love it❣

So you're saying that he runs like a black Ho'!

😂😂😂 best description ever

That’s from a research paper at MIT, yes? Excellent analysis my brother…..EXXXCC-EEELL-ENT!

Your duche if u think he's a real fighter he couldn't fight his way out of a wet paper bag duche

He wouldn't dare enter a cage with that akido nonsense 😂

Meh. Texas rangers just pretending to be Chuck Norris.

At least Chuck Norris is legit.

Who is also god

And the Blues.

And taught the blues to BB King

@@manofthewest67yep, a true blues man.

He is also a "healer"

Lmao to the Wilhelm

Deep

It's like hearing Donald Trump calling someone crooked! 😂

Talk about projecting 😆

@@cveuskens they are all crooked at that level

He was talking about himself

Liars actually believe their made up 💩 some can't even distinguish I think

Bullshitto?

@@mp5kfisher241 Yeah the ancient art of lying about yourself to make yourself look good.

Yeah he's been a 69th degree blackbelt for 85 years. 🤣

Lies. He's at least 420.

It's genetic, not the Irish side.

🤣🤣🤣🤣

I don't like Chuck Norris one bit, however, unlike Steven seagal, Chuck Norris is an actual martial artist with verifiable fights verifiable belts and has been vouched for by other verifiable fighters.

What’s not to like about the guy. He’s a solid down to earth man.

That was good 👏

Every morning before breakfast, Chuck Norris does Infinity push-ups.

To be fair (to an obvious dickbag) and as someone who has spent decades in MA and in Qigong (Qi channeling being the core of Aikido), it is a well known side effect to have a large belly or even barrel chest due to the special breathing exercises used to spark and refine qi. Bruce Lee studied Aikido but stopped because he “started to grow the chi belly” and that didn't work with his physique in movies. Segal (the dick) lived in Japan, spending a lot of time among teachers, which would require in Japanese culture the stance of an unassuming man; hands held back and back held straight to display your openness to the teachings. It's possible this cultural posture stuck with him. I used to watch first-generation Chinese people walk and wonder why they walked differently. Now I feel like we walk basically wrong. The weirdly femme way new Chinese Americans walk is actually due to ancient teachings on retaining qi, so it doesn't “leak out” your perineum you move with these Kegel muscles in tone not flaccid. This puckered-hip position not only also assists in MA footwork but is required for powerful kicks. If you do a front kick while maintaining a stance like an unbending pole, you have the forward force mediated (reduced) by the hips, which in this position resist the kicking movement, making it slower and weaker. With the “Chinese stance” (basically wing chun minus the pigeon toes), your hips remain a point of leverage, increasing the power of the kick, the last moment flick of the hip available from this stance is like a whip crack in that you take the speed travelling forward (F) and the hip speed (H) times the weight behind the kick (W) it works out to 300lb when done properly. Do you think if you did a toe pad flick kick right now without bending without tensing the hips and throwing them into it just from a straight standing that the kick would be 300lbs? Mine is - but I use the stance, which if it rubbed off into my normal walking would look weird AF, but it doesn't. The point is that the weird walk could be a result of training

And he runs like a gawky teenager.

And runs like he’s punching me he air in front of him.

Isn't that the Connor McGregor walk?

What a hell of mixed person you are 😂 I guess you have blue eyes

I am an African American Japanese Jew.

And I’m a god

He’s not Filipino, that’s a good thing.

I see what you did there heheh

The funniest joke about all these soy boys bashing Seagal is that Segal would bend them all into a pretzel.

Nobody likes a competition

@@hujhujhujhuj5734 except a "which lie is the more honest, the truer lie" - battle of course ...

...cuz he is one

Exactly. What I find utterly dumbfounding is his ability to describe the person/thing with whom he's having problems only to faultlessly describe himself, and he simply doesn't understand that everyone watching can clearly see that he's describing himself. Mind boggling. Two types of actors, pure thesbians and fakes, and he hates the fakes. 🙄 I mean, seriously....the clown has zero acting ability, none whatsoever.

At this point, almost half the country is in that boat with him...

Yeah, he's so delusional he lacks any self-awareness whatsoever!

Seems a totally weird thing to say but maybe the jokes on those that presume to know where his head is at. He could be just being a smart arse

When did he change his name to Claire?

Bet they never saw that coming....

@@martiny1804 Hahahaaaa

he really thinks he's something for someone who is very palpably not so bright. AND FAT

You discover someone is good at martial arts from dish washing? 😂 Cut. It. Out!

He only lived in Michigan till 5, a Full hr away from Detroit. He grew up in Fullerton, Ca. Orange County 😂 true shit

How else do you think Toyota & Honda were able to get a foothold in the Motor City?

😂😂

forgot to tell segal is black (and mohaw, mongolian, russian, asian, texas, american)

so cringe im crying rn😅😂

He changes his accent depending on the situation, he's a master of disguise. CIA agent confirmed.

I remember that scene. Hilarious. Right up there with the seated fight scenes.

😂😂😂

😂

No. This is reserved by Biden only!😂

I think you mean Trump with his baby steps complete with toilet paper stuck to his shoe.. or maybe it was the classified documents he had in his bathroom?

it is not appropriate to call Seagal fat. The poor word fat only has 3 letters and is completely overwhelmed to express how overweight he is

He's really good at disarming anyone with a bag of Mac Donald's

​@sealijivstanga7 ❤😂😂😂

He spent TWO YEARS learning to punch.

lol

​​@@BonusHoleNo, regardless of all this and his complete nonsense talk 😂😂. If Steven Seagal's claim about being made to spend two years learning to punch was actually true, then it would have most likely been his teacher teaching him discipline and respect for his teacher while his teacher was observing him to make a decision on whether or not he was going to train him.

Yeeahh, that's the ticket.

He also sent people to the blood bank for 55 yrs

He also killed a puppy, during a raid on a cock fighting farm, along with 100+ shot Roosrers.

Sounds more like a speech by your US president.

He was, I was there.

He’s been called that for about 20 years!

lol me too.

​@@stevebell4853 Me three!

me four

5 here 😂😂😂

I upvoted yours because it was just what I was thinking. The video is slick, the comments are hilarious.

Steven Seagal beat the crap out of his beautiful wife Kelly Lee Brock. He impregnated their underage Nanny, got a quick divorce, and married the underage girl so he would not be charged with child molestation. Zen!

He's never been dangerous to anyone else

@@EighmyLupin Aw... Come on... That's unfair. He was also dangerous to stuntmen that didn't expect a complete psycho that would kick them in the nuts at full force.

Watching the bit where those women were saying what happened was just horrific. Mans a proper nonce

That is true. It is a shame that he got away with it.

Yep lmao 🤣💀🤣

😂😂

200%

He admits being of all races except his true race.... beginning with j and ending with w

@@nobloodyusername little hat people!!

That's not true. Stop downplaying his many talents. He is also a Master in Bullshido.

😂

@@lesvampyres5429 is that were he learned his epic armshare death slap 🤣🤣🤣

@@lesvampyres5429 That's nothin, his 37th degree pink belt in bullshitzu is the GOAT.

I heard he always knows the art of Liekwondo

nah, just a psychopath who happened to be in the right place at the right time

he taught Anderson Silva so hows he a troll

@@topg-ko6vs did you see that Silva laughed when asked if Seagal taught him that kick? Silva said he was training that kick years before Seagal trained him. And a Bonus info: that Side Karate Chop is a TOTAL FAKE MOVE. It is done not with the outside of the hand but the other way, with the knuckles of your thumb.

It's called schizophrenia, actually it's a serious mental ilness and Seagal has it all his life, thats why he thinks he is everything

@@PauloMinado there are different types. Some use thumb side, some use pinky side. The one I was taught using the thumb side is more like a rising strike from down near waist up to head or neck, the pinky ones are sideways from around shoulder height to head or neck. I haven't seen the one he is doing, but would make sense to use pinky for that. Try doing it with the thumb side, it's very awkward.

Lil fishing 😅

😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂

😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂

Its been a thing for at least 15 years. "Water"???😂😂😂😂 bruh you killed me with that word

​@ABC-uq3mx Okay, Steven.

​@@tylerironside8109😂😂😂 don't be like this

You know Anderson has said the opposite right? Crazy how you guys run wild. Is he the best BS artist to ever do it yes. Is he also one of the best Akido(dork martial art) guys around? Probably. Does it maybe have some really nice techniques? Probably.

@@I-HAVE-A-BOMB wow. Big Segal fan? I can’t believe they still exist.

@ballen787 No, just don't love hating things. Did he break your heart?

Soo fuckan funny man!!!

😂😂😂😂😂

Bullshito

@@davidpignatore6532 Nice. My initial thought was "Wow, Eddie Munster sure has let himself go."

I would give half of all my money to see you say that in his face and get away with it and in while i was recording it :)

Lol What a load crap right?

I was absolutely cracking up with those babies 🤣🤣

ooo, who else is wildly different from how they pretend to be?'

@@sporkazmable Everyone? Segal just got more out of it than most people. lol. Gotta love the ending part of every celebrity kill piece. Random Girl Who Doesn't Matter Says: "He toucheded me!" The instant any star isn't a legend anymore, pussy suddenly has regret. And pussy laws are retroactive.

But Seagull persona was always a diva. All the people that worked with him joked about him.

A wonderful anecdote 👏

You Americans idolize movie stars beyond reason. Seagal is a character just like 007. I like them, but I do not idolize them.

That was awesome! Talking negatively about actors who's only goal in acting is to be worshipped. . . I almost thought he MUST be trying to make a joke on his own behalf! lmao!!!

*Eat

@@MF-kr4hfBoth😤😤😤

The undisputed super overweight champion

Him and Chael, baddest men on the planet

You're funny

That’s exactly it - period. Every mind is a world on its own. Not EVERYONE may comprehend the point of view expressed - a very minute may - & that’s IT!!! You do. Ok. You don’t, ‘Oh, well’. Get up off the floor, shut the ‘F’ up & get on with YOUR LIFE.

​@christoronaldo7673Yes it was, because Steven Segal didn't star in it...

pinched her what at 32:47?

@@perjanuschas8050 nice

Isnt that a quote from gladiator

Fr 😂

Waddle ,you mean😂!

Maybe it's why he so good /s

Savage😂

@@streetcone303 hehehe. But it's true. Best jokes are jokes that are based on facts 🤓

Straight Like that. He Pressure 🤣🤣🤣😂

He has money and bought THAT?

@@joelonsdale Fucking gold!!!! bravo!!!