Brilliant and so necessary. Excessive gentleness can be perceived as permission; a reaction that allows continuing delusion. That is not compassion. That can’t help and I would contend is cruel to others while encouraging arrogance in self.
not perse, it's probs more your attachement or your genteleness is actually fear of being authentic and part of a fawn response. You can see the truth just as clearly and walk away gently, thete is no opposition there, just the willingness to see and have your sense of fullfillment within enough to walk
We are taught to always be kind to everyone and end up being taken advantage of at times, but this teaching is so powerful! Thankyou again for the wisdom!
Wise words ,However it's hard to change your nature ,Sometimes you need to put a hard shell on your back ,certainly in today's world ,As people see your kindness for weakness
It is really going to change my life. For the whole of my life I was excessively soft with everyone but unfortunately they took disadvantage of my nature. This story is immensely inspiring. Thank you for sharing. ❤
Chinese budist/I say dont let western changes way of thoughts in your own private pool of ones own journey. Be soft enough to bend and not hard enough to break.
It is Very misleading to "encourage" non-gentleness. & according to comments here, they've been misled.😢 Be Gentle Always in addition to discernment, wisdom etc. People pleasers & those who've yet to deal w/ their "attachments" may find, not being gentle to everyone, a fake easing of their internal stress. But it's not wholly healthy.
Sometimes the only way to successfully set boundaries after using all appropriate methods of skillful means requires the use of being harsh. This will ensure the person finally realizes your boundaries which are, at this point, impenetrable.
the only boundrie you need is the willingness to walk away and maybe protect yourself with immediate danger. Someone needing endless/agressive reminders of your boundries usually dont care about how you feel
Thank you for this video. I have been wanting to change my habit of being too gentle. It makes me angry with myself. I have to develop equanimity to help myself in this situation. Namo buddhaya 🙏
While the words here try to point to something, it really leaves everything up to interpretation. Saying "it's wise to set boundaries" it doesn't say which boundaries, when, how much? I don't deny that setting boundaries can help my "well-being"....but how do I decide what is truly necessary and what is just me avoiding things I don't like? Being kind, gentle and compassionate are all practices. If we decline to face situations, we forfeit the practice in difficult times where it might be of most use if we have the courage.
What form of Buddhism is this? Not Theravada...would Theravadins approve? I would say practice meditation on the four limitless states (love, compassion, rejoicing, equanimity) and don't care about being soft or hard care about the joy and bliss within yourself that destroys the concern of being hard or soft...enlightenment is the highest enjoyment, bliss, and freedom...think of a memory when you were very happy were you concerned with being hard or soft? What if you could always be happy all the time?
I need to listen to this every day. Trying to defend myself from judgement and thinking less of myself for not convincing the perpretrator that he needs to respect me. Seems to happen when Im least expecting it. From my own son. I dont want to talk to him ever again. Again. Thank you for thia video. I will overcome my fears and live my life like someone left the gate open.
I am grateful for a great lessons! Sharing a lesson (formular) from my zen teachers so we can apply to solve life problems 1. Listening 2. Understanding = love 3. knowledge 4. Logical or rational 5. Wisdom 6. Compassion 7. Courage
Bhai Mera bhi ak channel hai mai bhi inspirational, motivation, life lesson etc related video upload korta hu thora visit korke ou... "Krishna's Motivation"
You are more than foolish if you take My kindness for a weakness . In reality And I believe that it's is your own loss if you do so. Sadly I don't have to wish Bad on Anyone because I don't believe it to be necessary . nor warranted . It Not something I need in order to achieve peace. I Just do Me . And that is to be happy whenever possible . I don't allow others to determine my approach. By I'll feelings . To me it piontless to let them gain the upper hand on how you best portray yourself and your heart.
This seems to be a GPT generated script with the prompt being something along the lines of "Write some ways in which Buddhism isnt just about being "soft" to others. Thats why the narrative isnt allignining with the title. GPT just cant reconcile "who should a good Buddhist be hard on?" with the actual teachings of the Buddha. Thats actually really beautiful if you think about it :)
That's right, most people try to make him a "god", while Buddha himself said, "everyone can become buddha", its a philosophy of not living life as an animal, instinctual and reactionary, but like a human who has free will, that's why there are 6 paths(state of mind, not real places),Hell- > Preta-> Animal-> Asura -> Human -> Deva.
I've never learn about Buddhist and yet i've been learnning those skill without know it exisit. it must been an natural for me in my domain, I've been self taught since i was 14 in 1976. don't ask me how i knew this
Sir Mera bhi ak channel hai mai bhi inspirational, motivation, life lesson etc related video upload korta hu thora visit korke ou... "Krishna's Motivation"
The teachings of this brother, not the religion that was formulated by man's opinion of what he said, just like we see in the many denominations of Christianity. Helping me on the path to meeting God Himself.
Hi there, community. I came across this video a few days ago. I was looking for answers due to way I have been feeling and thinking. My love life is not the best, and meeting a new person gives me anxiety. Anxiety for not corresponding to her, anxiety for losing her, anxiety if I will be target of another cheating experience. I'm almost 30 and feel disappointed that I couldn't get my feeling on track. This video is a relief. And soon, my life would probably continue as it is now. The reason I'm writing this is to raise awareness and unity. I'm not alone, and for those who can help give us a hand. Thank you.
Anxiety is a clinging to what could be and not receiving it, depression is clinging to what has happened and how it was. You got to be here, right now, and stop thinking about the what could be or what has been. Just be you and to hell with the consequences.
Don't be soft to those who are hard on me . Bad influence is the start of a bad tomorrow. Live today like it's the only day and tomorrow will be given to us to choose what we will do we with it.
Well, I've tried this, and found the middle way, tried to help... but some people will not even respect the fact you have an alternative opinion. I'm finding women, and met some women I really admire, but others are really very abusive, and as I said won't even accept a difference of an opinion. I've just come out of prison, refused bail, which is why I went to prison and was hunger and water strike because I'm tired of the false allegations of such bullying women. And to be honest, I 'still' don't feel like I've done enough to change things.
To not be judged unfairly, and not just unfairly, people's efforts to do the right should be recognised@@PallasAndDove. Certainly, they shouldn't be criminalised, and a man judged on his gender rather than the merit of his character and what he is trying to achieve?
Or as Krishnamurti put it “It’s no measure of health to be well adjusted to a profoundly sick society.” It’s seems that Buddha had the same predicament as Jesus, using words to describe the indescribable. The level of education in those days was marginal and literacy was relatively low, so it’s a blessing that much of this wisdom survived.
This has been my true weakness all my life as a result I have totally isolated myself from people and after the passing of my daughter very recently my boundaries had been totally broken as I was at my weakest point in my life Now I get extremely panicked when being talked to plus most of the talk I am not interested in. I really need to address this issue. Thank you so muchhh
Wow, this Buddhist story really spoke to me. It reminded me of the importance of not being afraid to stand up for yourself and not let others take advantage of your kindness. It's so easy to get caught up in being "soft" to everyone, but this story inspires me to find a balance between being compassionate and asserting boundaries. Thank you for sharing this enlightening video!
Baha’i Teachings is a revival of the Buddhist Principles! Meaning, the fundamental Divine Teachings are renewed in This Day in the One Cause of God, in His new sent Manifestation - Baha’u’llah (The Glory of God)…. eternal in the past and eternal in the future! Yabaha ‘ul-abha!
😂 Thank you for whatever you called teaching , teach . Talking nice doesn’t mean I’m soft or hard . What happened to your thinking or your thoughts. Do you have headaches cuz you keep repeat the same thing . Take some medicine to clear yourself 😂❤✌️
Sir Mera bhi ak channel hai mai bhi inspirational, motivation, life lesson etc related video upload korta hu thora visit korke ou... "Krishna's Motivation"
It's profound to learn Excessive Compassion = Enabling (that's crippling the person to be stuck in their ruts). Also, that's divine confirmation to emphasize that one can't heal in the place where they got sick, to begin with! God, please expand my horizon & equip me with insights to see my stop line + confidence to execute healthy boundaries. In Yeshua's Name , I pray. 🛐 Amen!🙏
Admirable values of of his teaching on how to conduct our life wisely in dealing with others.Tq.for sharing valuable moral strength in personal development
Mothers are too soft, a corrupt mother even more. It hurts the kid, the son of such mother or father will kill her or him for not teaching him to be respectful and considerate, make him realize being responsible and trustworthy makes you very likable and popular. This pampered son will find the world avoids him, wishes he were dead. He has a hard fate. He will one day realize his old parents avoid him too. Now too much hardness is going to hurt a little kid, you forgive many mistakes your kid makes, the punishment or lesson must not destroy the trust he has in his elders. Same is to be adhered to by his teachers. The middle path of Buddha was evolved so as to be reachable to family kind, his hard path for the monk had no relaxation. Not that he was a monk trainer either, he himself had followed the rules that his predecessors found useful. As monks we have to find happiness in the vast, can we be limited in bliss? No. Leave behind the concepts of "I", the "person", these are root for pain and pleasure cycle, break that circle to feel the process, find the strength of this imaginative process.
This video has changed my life in a way I cannot explain. Thank you for teaching the importance of the middles way and not clinging to the rigidity of being overly gentle. It’s so important to be authentic while being compassionate
