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i don't know if i have to be sad that hard times came to an end now that my life is more abundant, it was worth the time learning about life in it's extreme form ,it made me wise and capable to understand others much more ,would it perhaps be missing these moments of hardship as i was so used to it ,i don't know ,it won't change my perspective i gained to the things around me ,i only understand that i can't teach people these without them facing these challenges themself ,i can bring a horse to the river but can't make them drink .should i drop back to this way again and show my aspected students to become Templars how to manage while i not even have to go trough this no longer ,it's complex and perhaps have to send them on missions and see what they make out of it which i already know that they would fail and give up if they not be supported with a mentor .