Teen's Shifting Decisions on Keeping the Baby | Mercy | MD TV 

"the source of her greatest disappointment" Pretty sure she has a name.

Unfortunately it's still stigmatised.

It's hard it's the hardest thing to do ..

Even an open adoption has no guarantees. The adoptive family can one day just decide that they're done "sharing" and because they're the full, legal parents, the bio mom has no say. Just like the bio mom can agree to the adoption up until birth and just change her mind and the adoptive couple is SOL. Nothing matters outside the four corners of a legal contract and most of those sweet little promises in order to get it signed get dismissed because they're not legally binding.

@@thatvalensteingirl yes and that’s why you make sure you have it in writing it’s an actual open adoption when it’s being written up. You can decide what you want done. I was looking into adoption at first and I went through all of this

I had my first at 14 and it changed my life scary but a blessing this one hurt

I had my baby at 11 and she 4 and I’m barely 15

@@Miss_swiftie13 miss thang are you ok? are you safe?

@@Miss_swiftie13wth

❤❤❤❤❤

But sometimes people let it seems like ur a bad mom when clearly as a mother that don't have it is trying to give the child a better life that it's impossible for you as a mother to give at the moment.

This^^^^ I know a few women who did give their babies up for adoption when they were much younger and they were very proud of their decision and we met in college and they really stood by it and how they had the ability to go to college and they met the family and their child had the chance at a wonderful life now. I also think people forget that there are open adoptions where there are sometimes circumstances where a child will still eventually ask about or know the biological parent when it's the right time and place to do so. It doesn't always mean that parent is gone forever. Sometimes loving someone is doing what is best for them and that is really really hard.

there is no right time for anyone nobody’s ever prepared there’s never a late time learning things adoption isn’t something that’s necessary for everyone so mhm don’t judge

nobody’s ever ready shush

​@AvaGevingOfficial her situation is different though. although she loved the baby, she just wasn't ready with everything else happening in her life, and she made the best decision for her kid so he can have a good life

@AvaGevingOfficial maybe people aren’t completely ready but some are far less ready than others. The mother was completely alone, had no one to support her, was so poor the adoptive parents were paying rent for her, and broke down at the first little bump in the road. Meanwhile the adoptive parents were much more ready for parenthood than she was. Maybe someday in the future she’ll be more ready, but right now, she wasn’t ready enough.

@@colleenodriscoll8914i got pregnant in july i am not employed myself or prepared do we all have to have a job to be prepared etc it’s good yeah but it’s not always like this so whatever

and???????

@@AvaGeving she either had to keep the baby or give the baby away

I've always planned to adopt a kid, but I wouldn't want anyone to give up their kid unless they were absolutely sure. That's selfish. Tons of other kids out there for me. There is only this one blood related child for that mom.

Couldn't have said it better myself ❤

Well it doesn’t work that way. Even after signing a birth mother has so many days to change her mind.

That’s not how adoption works. Birth mother always has a certain amount of time to change her mind.

I do get it and it's why many people do use an agent or an agency over person to person because an agency dealing with notifying you they have a healthy baby for you to come pick up from a mother with no drug/illicit substance history can be easier than the roller coaster of having this happen, let alone happen multiple times as it would be heart breaking to prepare for a boy and then the next person is set to have a girl and you redo your nursery and then they back out too and it would just feel like you were never going to adopt a child and in this case and others there was also the fact they were financially supporting the mother by paying rent and some also require nutritional support and other things. . . .it would really hurt. Thankfully Open Adoptions are an option where a bio mom can be sent pictures and updates so it's to like the baby is gone and they never see them again and they do sometimes have a relationship with the child later when the child is old enough to learn they were adopted and they kind of end up with three parents and it can make the bio mom feel better about handing the child over because they are not "gone" forever. In the cases I have known this has worked well for the bio mom has gone to college and gotten a degree and gone on to get a career and the child is usually old enough to find out they were adopted and start seeing bio mom occasionally and learn what she made of herself by that point. It can be really good for all involved.

Ok, now imagine the adoptive parents being excited for weeks or months for the child. Maybe they are infertile. Imagine hoping for something and right at the finish the second you touched it it gets ripped out of your hands. They paid so much for it. The baby stuff, the bio mom's rent. They were upset rightfully. No the hospital didn't have any right to convince bio mom about the adoption and yes, bio mom had every single right keeping the baby. However the adoptive parents were rightfully upset since they were promised to have that baby. So no, they were absolutely not rude. Karen was even so nice to offer her the stuff instead of throwing them out or let it get dusty somewhere in their home.

@@antares8476as much as they are excited. that gives them no right to interfere with how nature works. a moms love works in crazy ways. they have every right to be upset but there’s no comparison. it’s always the mother.

​@@floatsyourboats6843 love means zilch if the mother is not mature or stable enough to take care of a child. Don't blind the needs of a baby with emotions.

Well in reality the birth mother gets all the day so who’s in the room included and is really the first who gets to even hold the baby after birth. No one can even hold the baby until after the mother. Even with the adoptive parents paying everything she birth mother can do that , that’s true by legal rights the birth mother has a certain amount of days to change her mind after the adoption is finalized. And it’s not THEIR baby nothing has been signed for the adoptiob

​@floatsyourboats6843 It's not even about the mother's reaction or thae adoptive parents. It is about what is best for the child and the adoptive parents (to me) seem more capably

Two parents doesn’t mean a good life…

@AvaGevingOfficial Who romanticises teenage pregnancy? Everyone makes fun of teenage pregnancy, including myself.

​@@Anonymous-io9vpthis show is from 2009-2010 which is exactly when shows like Teen Mom and 16 and Pregnant were getting popular.

@@hexes5122 Surely, these shows are trying to shed light on the fact that teenage pregnancy does exist and it is common, maybe these shows act like deterrents.

My and sis (toddler)

The problem lies more with the fact that she was completely unprepared to raise a child. As far as I know, the adoptive parents paid for her rent, which means she doesn't have a stable income. And as seen, her own mother wasn't ready to care for both her daughter and grandson. So, if she tried to crash at her mother's place, she would have been thrown out, something you don't want to experience at this stage. I think calling her mother helped her dodge a horrible scenario and also made her realise that she is alone with that child. I don't know if there is a place young mothers can go to be taken care of and she definitely doesn't have the money to hire a nurse or nanny. Like I said, she pretty much is unprepared, so a little reality check was actually needed 😅

The mother isn’t thinking practical. It’s the hormones and emotions mixed in

​@@RoteKirschblueteThe adoptive parents were paying her to get her baby. Basically they are buying the baby. But that doesn't make it right to pressure her to give up her child. It is morally wrong.

@@OctoberOctopusM yes and no. there is a lot of gray area here in that regard. honestly what probs would’ve been best would be for the adoptive parents to take the baby and have an open adoption where hannah can come visit or babysit while seeing a therapist to work through all the emotions. giving birth is an extremely hormonal thing that totally screws up a persons emotions and can affect rational thinking. there is what is best for the baby and what is best for hannah. both deserve a good life and happiness and trust me single mothers don’t always have the easiest life. the nurse wasn’t trying to pressure her she was trying to get hannah to see the big picture and future in front of her to decide whether she REALLY felt capable and ready to raise that baby. it’s clear that all of them would support her choice regardless of what it ended up being even if they didn’t necessarily agree with it but she was making a very impulsive decision which is totally understandable given the circumstances.

No, the girl openly stated this was HER PLAN and the nurse needs to know the teen and child have a safe home with heat and running water to go to when they leave the hospital bc it's called being a mandated reporter and doing her job. It was also to get the teen to realise that her plans were not realistic as she had told the nurse that her mother was not supportive and would not be there for the birth and then after the child was born she recanted and claimed she was going to live with her mother. . . .who she doesn't get along with. The teen was not thinking clearly and wanted things that were not possible and didn't have the resources to care for herself (the adoptive parents were paying for her) or the child. The nurse can't turn a 3 day old infant out onto the street so the next call would be Social Services.

He was mentioned as a “one night stand” so its very likely he wouldnt have anything to do with the pregnancy.

No. Your wrong. This happens

​@@theamazingpoof2205What happens?

I think it’s Called Mercy

100 percent agree! I can't believe all these people in the comments!

How do you know it wasn't an open adoption? Most are these days. The fact that they know each other and they were there for the birth points to it being open. Closed adoptions don't work like that.

I 100% agree with this comment the birth mother should of had that chance to raise him even with the help of the adoptive parents and then if she decides that it’s to hard then she can make that choice she had no support network which makes it even harder 💔

​@tiannahcollard5969 She made an agreement. If she doesn't want that, that is fine, but she would need to support her child. Everything that is said indicates she has no money and no support system. The adoptive parents have money and might even have support. So maybe it is not best for her, but it seems better for the child. A child needs more then love, it also needs food and other stuff.

It happens people change their minds.

you can opt out you don’t have to stay committed people change minds it’s the birth moms right to know what she wants in her heart adoption is a scammy business and it’s horrible i’ve heard many bad stories someone i’m close with spoken up about the agency being corrupt which is true they lie too and you don’t see your baby again even sadly if it’s open. it doesn’t matter it’s a scam 😢

and like i said even if it was an open adoption illegally the adoptees can change minds at any time about rules and shi it’s illegal too

​@@AvaGeving Of course scams can happen. There are bad people in literally every profession. Doesn't mean that adoption in general is bad. Major hormones are impacting this young woman's decision after the baby's birth.

Basically no one has a support system anymore

No she did what was best for the baby

She's a nurse and understands the rush of hormones after a pregnancy that causes a change like this. Girl was living in a house with 5 other people, couldn't pay rent, and had no familial support. This wasn't a situation a pep talk was ever going to fix..

idk about awful, she’s just immature and clearly not prepared to keep the baby even though she’s feeling emotional

She wasn't awful. She had every intention of going through with the adoption until she laid eyes on her baby. It's completely normal for someone to feel differently when a hypothetical situation becomes a reality. She realised pretty quickly that she couldn't look after him. An awful person would have dangled the baby in front of the adoptive parents to get money.

​@@MsMaryPatriciaI totally agree with what you said. I myself didn't want kids, however my body hates me, im highly fertile and get pregnant very very easy even on contraception and im not talking about the pill as anyone can mess that up but even depo injection and the implant dont work, im 48 and should be in menopause yet i had my 14th miscarriage 2 months ago, and I'm now on both the implant and the pill !!. After my 6th miscarriage I was told id never carry due to not producing enough pregnancy hormone to keep baby, but I did manage to kind of carry twice, both were very premature one born at 31 weeks the other 26 weeks, and I only got them because I was apparently carrying twins and my body was confused after I lost one, and I was threatening misscarrige from 6weeks with both of them. But for someone who never wanted or planned to have kids, I even had both prenatal and postnatal depression, things changed after I saw them. Although I still wouldn't want anymore and can't wait until my Dr decides I am old enough for the sterilisation I've been asking for the past 20 years, apparently I'm too young for it, well that's what I've been told every time I've asked them every year, however they have now said im old enough to have a interview to see is they will do it now so its a small step towards my goal of having my womb removed and i cant wait 😀

That’s why the law gives birth mothers the right to change their mind.

She wasn't messing them around out of cruelty.

what’s funny to you?

What's disgusting?

I’m sorry you went through that. Adoption is a beautiful option for women who don’t want to keep a baby or aren’t ready to be parents.

If you're yt, have 2 more, as long as they're yt.

@@whiteyonthemoon1193 what is YT?

​@@BRUNETTECANARYgood luck with getting sterilisation, I've been begging to have it done for over 20 years and they say every year im too young.!! Yet here I am 48 highly fertile and can get pregnant even on contraception and im not talking about the pill as anyone can mess that up but even depo injection and the implant dont work on me, im actually on both the implant and the pill now to try and avoid getting pregnant and having my 15th miscarriage, I'm highly allergic to condoms so they are not even a option. I had my 14th miscarriage 2 months ago, I'm 48 I should be in menopause and not able to get pregnant but here I am 🙄 I've asked again to be fully sterilised I want everything gone including my womb as I'm taking any chances and now I'm 48 they have referred me for the interview but they may still refuse to do it. I hope you get it sorted but because your so young they may refuse to do it. In that case I recommend going on the implant you get it put in and replace in 3 years and unless your like me it will work, oh and the upside of both depo and the implant no periods !! Good luck xx 😊

@@annied1827 hysterectomy is what you should have asked for in the first place. Even teenage girls who have been diagnosed with reproductive cancer, have hysterectomies. I wish I could get a hysterectomy because reproductive cancer is what my paternal grandmother died of. I've never been tested for it though😓

name?

Wrong episode.

this isn’t the episode lmao wrong person you’re ruining it

Most moms giving their baby up for adoption don't want to see the baby. Makes it harder. But, at no point in this clip did they refuse to let their birth mom see the baby, so....

Agreed over 9000%

Would rather her force herself to take care of him or let him have a better life

@@Fellkunwould rather force her. She chose to have sex and get pregnant. Pregnant girls women need to be more responsible

@@alexandramoyer8785 Absolutely not. We don't force a child onto someone because they had to learn a lesson. We don't take someone's mistake out on a literal child. Get over yourself.

Not everyone is cut out to be parents. Giving a kid up for adoption is far better than some of the alternatives if she doesn’t want a kid.