Hi Dr. Ali Mattu. Is it possible to have ocd after going through a trauma? I lost my mom 13 years back due to cancer and since then I believe i have ocd… in anything and everything i do for my kids especially cooking - that if i touch the food it may get my kids or family sick. However, if i do any for rest of the world including myself, i am totally alright…!! I still have all memories of my mom’s suffering, the hospital back then, other patients, etc.. so so fresh in my mind. Only while cooking especially, i go into this ocdmode. I do get into ocd mode sometimes when i am picking clothes for my kids, or doing grocery too. Any suggestions on what steps should i be taking to live my life normally… i love cooking.. and feeding healthy to my family but i am very very tired of my ocd.. feels like so many years now.
It’s so hard to open up let alone try to forget it. There’s been days where I think about suicide all day and look at someone and smile and say I’m fine but really I wanna cry and want to be held.
Ahhh this explains to me why sometimes when I entered a good relationship, it felt like trauma treatment. It encourages safety. That's what it is. Thank you for your message.
Taking trauma from a first-person perspective and turning it into a third-person perspective. You no longer relive the trauma, but from a safe perspective are getting to see the details as though it is nothing more than a TV show that you get to dissect and understand better. Getting from the first person to the third person is where most of the work is at.
This is so true!! I feel that for number one, I not only got this from therapy but college as well. Going to college has made me feel seen and heard. I'm a high school drop-out on my way to getting my masters because of so🎉
Hope you’re doing GREAT! I got my master’s a few years ago (GED recipient). Take pride in the accomplishment, but don’t expect it to validate you. That’s the mistake I made and it cost me. Big.
Notes: - A BIG MYTH ABOUT TRAUMA TREATMENT: that you have to relive it in order to get over it. That's NOT how it works. The best / most effective treatments for PTSD and trauma do 3 things: 1) They EMPOWER you. People who've experienced trauma feel like choices were and have been taken away from them. Good / effective trauma treatment RESPECTS individuals, GIVES THEM CHOICES, and AFFIRMS who they are. 2) They ENCOURAGE SAFETY / MAKE YOU FEEL SAFE. They make you feel safe in the room. They teach people ways to regain a sense of control over your emotions and life. And they discuss how community might make you feel more or less safe. 3) They GIVE YOU A NEW / USEFUL / HELPFUL / ACTIONABLE PERSPECTIVE. Good trauma treatment helps you understand who you were, who you are, who you want to be, and how to get there.
@@teryv1259 I didn't say they weren't. I was trying to describe the type of comment it was (a note type thing VERSUS an opinion or experience comment). Writing down exactly what he said was helpful for me. If my writing down what he said isn't helpful for you, then just disregard. Besides, "notes" are just a summary of key points of anything anyway and this being a short video, that would make sense that the notes are easily just be the text of what he said. Also, doing that was mainly for me - it's a lot easier and FASTER for me to revisit / review / re - access and actually remember the message by glancing at what I wrote here (as a screenshot or saved in some other way - Google notes or something) - where the message is verbatim - than by rewatching the video, even if it is a short one. It's an important / valuable message to me and the is helpful for ME, "Bruh". 🤨 What are you doing trolling comments on mental health videos anyway? That's a rhetorical question - I don't want or need an answer.
@@tinaperez7393 I'm sorry if this offended you in any way. Didn't really mean to. I'm in a really dark cave myself and the comment reflected my inner confusion and obsessiveness I guess. Thank you for sharing your point of view, I think it kind of broadened my perception right now.
I wish I had a trauma therapist with this approach. Emdr really helped me but was one of the most brutal times of my life. The trauma therapist didn’t even explain the process or how difficult it could be. I have a health problem that is really affected negatively by physical or emotional stress, which I informed them off. They didn’t worn me or tell me what to expect or how to deal with feeling such horrible emotions that I never felt before. It felt very wrong like let’s do this intense work and then see ya next week with no support, coping tools or talk therapy
I was watching videos of people who visibly can be themselves and gas friends that truly cared about them. I recently cane to know my own trauma and how constant it was in every facet of my life. It's actually kind of hard to write this rn ngl haha to get the words out. But I'm realizing I never knew it's actually good and normal to feel the way these tips describe. I feel like crying and when I've opened up to people they often brush things off idk. It hurts .. ah ha My bf and friends I met thru him live far away from me now and they actually saw me for me and my trauma. Idk why I get brushed off otherwise at times it's actually quite triggering to even know how much people underestimate it at times
There are some fantastic trauma treatment manuals out there AND at the same time there’s a lot of training that goes into being a true trauma informed therapist. Trauma can present in a lot of different ways and if you don’t know what to look for you can easily mistake it for something else.
I've found that EMDR has been all three got me. My therapist allows me to choose what thought and memory we focus on, and what I want the healthy new thought to be. My therapist helps me to understand who I was, am, and who I want to be, and I feel safe in the room. I can tell you, Prolonged Exposure Therapy absolutely did the opposite of all three. It was horrible from the start and I didn't continue with it. I think that it all depends on the therapist you have and what kind of therapeutic relationship you have with them.
@@EnchantingWings1maybe EMDR was helpful for you play EMDR has the higher success rate when you're just working with PTSD and complex PTSD is a lot different. Also EMDR is notorious for making your symptoms significantly worse in the beginning as well as it being really hard for complex PTSD people to pinpoint specific memories since these are traumas that were consistently repeated. The more you know 🌈
Trauma and paranoia gets over with time it stays there all the time u just gotta carry on and try living with it i feel like all this treatments just teach you the way to look at it and handle it
Yeah, I'm not sure we get to gloss over the exposure element of trauma healing that easily... The principles you mentioned I consider sine qua non for treating trauma, but I'm just not sure that the exposure element of treatment (whichever form it takes) is unnecessary. Though it can vary by person, so I guess some people who end up needing trauma therapy could perhaps get better without exposure.
I was told i was never good enough by everyone and believed it. Made me look out for myself. Didn't want to be like that. Just want to be normal Learning slowly to trust other's again
OMG!!!! Finally someone who really understands what heck is going on with M.H. And NO I REFUSE TO follow the Veterans department of Health imposed, mandatory, treatment for PTSD and other MH diagnosis, which to relieved over and over the same event that mess me up, permanently, 43 years ago. One of the few MH good hearthed and caring Doctors that I encountered at the VA, was force to resin from her job of 16 years because she will allow her patients to choose which treatment the fell more comfortable with.
Ptsd trauma i have from the car accidents It built me confident it after 2 years of relearning Car accident impact my life i lost - lost memories - loud noise scares me - after 2 years i learned to accept it Easy and done and ptsd kinda died down slowly after accepting it without medication its just how u want it to control u
in regards to trauma treatment involving knowing who you were - how does this relate to C-PTSD, where a sense of self isn't developed when the trauma starts early in life and traumatic events happen persistently
FYI PTSD and cPTSD survivors sometimes NEED to tell someone and be heard and forcing this safe room thing on them is incredibly violating and harmful. Therapists need to be flexible and open minded as they tailor individual treatments.
Sorry from my personal experience. the only way to get back your 'soul piece' is to re live the trauma. Its literally taking part back of your soul which was is stuck in time by the trauma. You DO have to relive it.
Not necessarily since that could retraumatize the person and set you back. You could delve deep in some parts but that's only once you are comfortable with a trained therapist that understands trauma and one that has already given you the tools to use in case that happens. Also reliving it means to go so deep into the memory and not talk about it on a shallow level.
I JUST WANT TO SAY IT FOR EVERYBODY WHO HAS PTSD IN THE COMMENTS I DON'T I MAY NOT KNOW YOU BUT I'M SURE MANY OF US ARE HERE FOR A REASON CUZ WE'RE ALL CONNECTED SENDING ALL OF YOU GUYS LOVE AND LIGHT AND POSITIVITY TO YOUR LIVES KEEP GOING YOU GUYS ARE ALL STRONG AND YOU SHOULD BE PROUD OF HOW YOU'VE BEEN BATTLING AND FIGHTING FOR YOUR LIFE❤❤❤❤❤🥺🥺🥺🥺❤❤❤❤❤❤❤
Literally RU-vid suggested a clip right before this that said the complete opposite of this. This is so sad that that other kind of information is available on line. Especially with treatment models finally being updated after well earned decades of study
Yeah, but not all modalities work for everyone. Regardless of who, what, how, it’s a very individual process. What would you say, in your opinion, is the best method to deal with triggers?
Safety is a sense not a feeling. I refer you to Sylvan Tompkins "Affect states " re-constellation of the trauma which results in a less than resourceful state is what your alluding to
I could remember during the time of my grandma she had similar problem but got a good advice from my colleague who introduced me to a traditional therapist who deals on natural products.
You can darling...my grandma lived with it for 32years and with the aid iur my specialist she's free from it(PTSD). It was possibly done with some natural supplements, i will give you a link to follow up.
When I was 6 my mother got on a dating website. (my dad and mom were divorced) and because I was 6 and had no one to babysit sit me. my mother brought me with to meet him. She didn't like how he acted in public so she tried to leave. He kept telling her to stay and when she didn't listen. He beat both of us and I constantly flinch now. My mom got back together with my dad when I was 13. He was raised with physical punishment so he did It to me. I constantly compared him to the man. it did not help just made it worse so I'm all for this
You can’t make someone feel safe. You can only invite it through nervous system (ventral vagal) safety and (this is crucial for relational trauma) via the manner in which you engage in relationship WITH someone - as an attentive, intersubjective, collaborative, transparent conversation. I think the best trauma treatment restores power to the client centrally by being lateral, not top down. Attenuate power imbalance. This should NOT be confused with less responsibility. Less power over is more AWARENESS of the way power exists structurally in therapy, a far INCREASED sense and acceptance of responsibility.
Can u have ptsd after a betrayal? My ex of 4 years was having an affair and despite leaving her and starting a new happy life I still get dreams about my past the good and bad. Is this ptsd?
#1 Empower you. What does that even mean? empower you to do what? How? Everything, and I do mean EVERYTHING takes choices away from you. Everything you do, everything you don't do, and all of the actions, and inactions of every quark in the universe takes choices away from you. You say 'empower' however the word for what you are describing is 'encourage'. Either way, it is a meaningless waste of time and energy, for all involved. #2 encourage safety. What is that supposed to mean? 'look both ways before you cross the road'? The only way to 'make someone feel safe, is to lie to them, or infuse them with chemicals. Safety, like the tooth fairy, is a myth. You don't control emotions, you feel them. You can only control how you react to them, if you are lucky. Community makes you less safe, as it requires the presence of other people. Humans are the most dangerous thing on this planet. #3 give you a new perspective? More meaningless fluff. everything gives you a new perspective. everything thing you see, hear, smell, touch, taste, experience, imagine, or dream. Your mind is in a constant state of change. New connections are made, old ones fade away. perspective is like a river, it never remains the same . . . even if it seems to. This video is empty fluff. You spoke much, and said nothing.
As a trauma survivor thank you for articulating this! I’ve been gaslighted so much about my trauma and that has honestly done more damage than the initial trauma. CBT is gaslighting.
Hey I got a mini heart attack after seeing a white creature outside my house and it’s 11:06 pm I’m scared I live in a farm I’m trying to let go of it I saw it just now I’m terrified I’m real not lies
Jokes on you I can’t remember most of the traumatizing things that happened so I don’t have to relive it 😂. Nor do I even know if it really happened or if I’m making it all up and it’s all in my head and I had the same normal childhood everyone else did 😅 but WHO KNOWS not me that’s who.
It would be weaving in the usual ways of supporting someone on the spectrum. That includes: 1. Increasing predicability. 2. Make things visual and specific. 3. Draw from passions (i.e. special interests or perseverative interests). 4. Preview future events visually. 5. Plan out choices.
@@drali The autistic experience is far more than black and white thinking and literalism. The traumas we experience are often more specific to our neuro types and we are often more targeted and vulnerable. We see patterns you don’t see, we experience emotions at decibels we are unable to articulate that many neurotypicals would crumble under. Your layout of approach way under estimates the needs of our specific community. People in the autism community are nearly 7x more likely to die of un-aliving. Please don’t treat people within the autism community, you’re far under equipped and will likely compound their trauma.
You really didn’t say anything that could help someone. You seem to emphasize really nothing. Time wasted. Don’t speak unless you can really describe what is in your head.
