THE ACOLYTE Episode 7 REVIEW: HILARIOUSLY Bad! 

The Jedi are using metal detectors to find out where the $180 million for this show went.

Cancelling Disney+ is the best thing you can do for your mental health. I cancelled months ago and haven't tried to carve my own eyes out with a spoon since.

When I saw the wookie using a metal detector to look for the force, I recalled the Spaceballs scene of the guys out combing the desert.

The Jedi spent 7 weeks on the planet, not once did they look up and see the LIT UP FORTRESS sat on top of the mountain they were next to! 😂😂

Turns into a giant threatening raven creature, doesn't expect to be considered dangerous, and gets killed. That's some writing.

I'm convinced that Leslye Headland, as ex-assistant of Weinstein, has dirt on some of the Disney head execs and that most of the budget of this 180 million usd has gone to her as payment.

Sol: “I can only hold one bridge. Both are too heavy!” Us: “…Fuck the bridge then. Just hold girls!” Sol: 🤔

Too bad, when exorcising the Wookie, Trinity didn’t go full “The Power of the Force Compels you! the Power of the Force Compels you!” “This Wookie is…clean.”

Remember: this cost around 200mill (without marketing, distribution, copyright etc). This was greenlit. Produced. Shot. Cut. Reshot. Post. Reviewed. Distributed. Promoted! This is how dumb they think we are.

Snarky Jay ripping the Acolyte apart each week has been a highlight of the week lately

Sol letting the Sith go because he can't harm an unarmed person. Dude he literally just killed a Jedi with his bare hands. His hands were the weapon. Also in this episode he lifts the bridge rather than just lifting the two girls. WTF?! Who made him a Master.

Leslie is currently writing her life biography, focusing on her time working for Harvey. This includes her troubling obsession with kidnapping young children and taking them to isolated islands. Such actions echo the practices of individuals who deceitfully label these disturbing activities as "family" endeavors, similar to the actions of the witches in this series!!!!!!.

This is supposed to be the show that Kathy Kennedy cried over when she read the script. She must have been crying while laughing, knowing that she was destroying a franchise

Indara was able to kill an entire coven of witches with her mind...yet got taken out by a steel dagger thrown by a weak force users. ( I just confirmed that yes, she did Kill Them all. Listen to the captioning for the Deaf version. They all fall lifeless to the floor.)

Watching a beautiful woman talk trash about the acolyte is how i get through life 😂

10:26 Master Sol: "Girls, that bridge is going to split! Run back and step off of that bridge!" Voila.

I guess the “Power of Many” got massacred by the “Power of One” ??? And then the “Power of One” got killed by a tiny kitchen knife?! lol

My favorite part was the witch Bluetooth connection somehow deleting the witches. Oh and the wookie who somehow couldn’t handle normal people. A creature that Han Solo said “Wookies can tear your apart limb from limb”

Best thing that got me facepalming myself so hard I almost broke my nose: There's this huge structure on a f*cking mountain, flashing lights and whatnot, and the Jedi haven't discovered it in 7 fricking weeks despite having analyzed every damn molecule on that planet. The second time was when a tiny lamp gets tossed onto a floor made of stone in a stone hallway, which burns a giant fortress-like structure made of STONE to the ground.😂

I truly admire your quick-witted Snarkiness. It is a gift. It makes me laugh out loud. You have truly earned the name SnarkyJay.

This show feels like they got 8 different writers with a vague idea of the plot and locked them all in separate rooms with no way of contacting each other and said ok each of you writes one episode

That wookie with the metal detector was looking for where production budget went.

3:06 Props for That Electric Boogaloo joke!!! And singing Karma Chameleon!

Snarky, I think I speak for most of us when I say "Thankyou for watching this, so we don't have to!" (I have not watched a single episode) and two "you can stop now, that's enough, save your sanity :)" Thank you for your service ;)

The stone Is actually bullshit-ite, it’s chemical properties are that it is extremely flammable when it needs to be a plot device. Disney chemistry 101

Just when you think Disney Star Wars can’t get any worse, they do something like this.

I have never seen “Karma Chameleon” stuck in the middle of a rant so naturally. Bravo Snarky!!!!

The scene you described with Torbin dropping to his knees and saying “ yes mommy” is how I envision Bob Iger’s relationship with Kathleen Kennedy.

The best thing about the Acolyte is I discovered Critical Drinker and Snarky Jay.

They are looking for life with metal detectors. It’s so fucking bad. They needed the Wookiee to say we ain’t found shit.

I have to give this show credit for one thing: it gives a whole new meaning to the concept of "hit and miss". With every scene they try to hit, and miss by a country mile.

Torbin felt so guilty about being repeatedly spiritually violated by the witches that he spent a decade in a self-induced meditation coma and then offed himself at the first opportunity that was given to him OK Leslie

I think we all underestimated the stupidity of Leslie headland.

Jay looks great doing the "sway and sing" thing. Definitely a good defense during a building collapse.

I thought this was, overall, a really good episode. It gave a lot more depth to Sol and his present-day actions. Mae being alive gives some redemption to a major mistake in his life. I think you're misinterpreting how the vergence plays into the twins' creation. They aren't the vergence themselves (like Anakin), but a vergence of the Force on the planet (a location, as noted in the episode) was drawn upon to create them, like a reservoir of power. Also, Indara saying the coven wasn't Nightsisters was based on her assumptions about the twins and an incomplete understanding of the situation; it's still very possible they were Nightsisters, or some splinter branch of them. I don't know if that will be addressed in the finale or not, but we don't currently have a definitive answer.

All these characters are representative of people from Lesli headland’s life with her shady boss.

You have the force. And there’s a collapsed bridge with only two people on it. Why would you use the force to help the 2 girls out? No no, just waste your force energy to save this bridge for some reason. Because space taxes paid for that bridge, so forget those girls. Save the bridge.

"Coins or gold teeth or the dignity that Disney once had..." Brilliant I literally can't stop laughing!

Your sacrifice of your sanity has been greatly appreciated, Jay; this is very easily your most hilarious video to date.

Congrats to Disney, the first company to find a way to entertain and at the same time not earn a dime off it. Literally I will not watch Disney but wait for Snarky review so I can die laughing at the plot holes. Only Disney could find a way where everyone watches the parody and no one watches the show itself.

Why does that Wookie look like Harry, from Harry & The Henderson's?

Series should have been titled "The Abomination". Would have been better for the franchise if, while on their way to deliver this material for pre-production, each of the creators/enablers of this slime had stumbled into a wood chipper, all eight scripts in hand. A bit harsh? smh. Snarky, you are an ANGEL for being the buffer we need between this show and our own mental health. Thank you!

Sol's head blocking the frame and Electric Boogaloo Caught me off guard! Great review, Jay! I can't wait for this nightmare to end on July 16th.

The base catches fire because it’s actually made of cardboard. I guess Headland didn’t think it would cause logical dissonance.

"The power of many" "Right but if you lose the physic link you all die instantly?" "Well yeah, obviously" "...........Ok, its just..... that doesn't seem that powerful" "Don't you try to jedisplain the thread to us" "Actually, it's called the..... do you know what, nevermind"

It's called Firestone. Cuz it's a stone that can catch fire, and that's definitely canon and wasnt just made up on the spot, and nobody can question it because the power of friendship.

Another great review Jay! Your videos absolutely make my week!❤

“The Good Son” reference just skyrocketed her credibility as a movie buff. No business knowing that movie 😂

The mother be like: Remember those Jedi that fear us? Well they're here, even that one that I randomly possessed threatened with dark magic a day ago right in front of everybody, and they want the child they politely and consensually asked to train, the one that wants to go with them, the one I've even privately but consensually agreed for them to take. My coven really doesn't want to listen to me and honor the kids wishes, this is a really tense situation. I better settle this down and avoid escalating things. I'm going to randomly, for seemingly no apparent reason, turn into a spooky ghost thing that can easily be interpreted as an attack now...because it'll look really cool! And all while my coven shouts violent threats at them and then act shocked when I'm stabbed. But the Jedi are the bad guys! Why did she do that? Why? WTF? How could she have EVER thought that was a GOOD idea?! The Jedi are there during the fire because, well, Torbin wants to go home. I swear to God, you can't make this shit up. They all feel unending life-long guilt...over this? Torbin and Kelnacca didn't even really do anything. THIS is why Torbin kills himself? This? And as for Sol, ah, ever pull a gun on a cop? SHOCKING when you're shot, isn't it? ...Sol didn't do anything wrong either. It LOOKED like an attack. And the reason for how the fire spread, the twist, is that there isn't one. It just did. And the real reason for why the witches died? ...I don't fucking know, none of us do. They apparently just read the Rian Johnson playbook and decided to die for...reasons. Did Indara kill them? Did the separation from possessing Kelnacca kill them? Did they just faint and the fire killed them? I don't fucking know. They just died because...they did. This feels like a third graders creative writing project.

OSHA only ever told me not to stack pallets waist high.

Until today I had no idea this channel existed…but now you have a new follower

"Remember how killing the Night King killed all the walkers in Game of Thrones?" "And how much people hated it?" "Yeah, let's do that!"

I laughed out loud when Carrie Anne Moss gripped up Sol in their ship and just stared in his eyes 😂😂😂

It’s really funny that these Disney Star Wars series are the different stages of grief when Disney took over… Denial Anger Bargaining Depression Acceptance - and this is where we are now with this show !

“The dignity that Star Wars once had” made me laugh so hard I spit my water out!

More so I need an explanation as to why Mae didn’t kill Sol when she had the chance to, because she literally witnessed sol kill her mother in front of her. I mean what was she even trying to find out? She knows who killed her mother. That, in itself should’ve drove her to the dark side. But no, she has bipolar issues and apparently Alzheimer’s disease

Jay is force sensitive at the grocery store: CONFIRMED

I think they were trying to show that the item that had the flame had highly flammable substance which then covered the door mechanism. It was the door mechanism that then caught fire which then started a chain reaction. Which makes sense, as that was a mining facility and why would they not design a mining facility to be so easy to explode if a door lock caught fire. As South Park sung "dum dum dum dum dumb"

“As my sweet mother always said, Son, if one episode was terrible, two are worse, And three, well, that’s just awful writing” -Hondo ohnaka

Trinity used the Vulcan Mind Meld to free the Wookie. Star Trek Wars everybody.

Why did Torbin kill himself then? Why does Mae keep changing motivations? Why don't they tell the jedi council about this guy? This show isn't just bad, it doesn't even make any sense now.

On the next episode of Acolyte, Chris Henson guest starts as protocol droid P-3dO and confronts Sol about his promises of "jedi training" random younglings.

The Brendock thing takes place 16 years earlier, Torbin was in the force coma for 10 years, so this guy went from Palawan to master in 6 years

When I saw the metal detectors, I got Spaceballs vibes when they were instructed to “comb the desert”….

RIP Star Wars 1977-2012

You have my utmost respect for sacrificing a little bit of mental health (@6:15) by watching the Acolyte series so that we don't have to. Much respect to you Snarky Jay🙂

I am so happy that you are watching this and reacting to it, honestly, I have not had to watch it. Could not make it past the first two without feeling sad that it was time off my life I will not get back.

So what exactly was so traumatic that Torben felt compelled to floatidate for 10 years in a force bubble? Is it just me or was this entire "not so secret bad Jedi agenda" not that big deal at all? I would have been bragging about stabbing a mist bird ghost lesbian witch, mid transition mind you, back at the J academy as soon as I got back.

Well to give them credit, thank god that these witches are not Night Sisters, they had the freedom to create whatever they wanted, but them dying all at once the power of many indeed.

I give it 10/10 for sparing us from having to look at Amandla Stenberg's vacuous stare for the whole episode.

My Childhood Shattered by Disney's Destruction of Star Wars My childhood in the 1990s was indelibly marked by the epic saga of Star Wars: Episodes IV, V, and VI. A cinematic masterpiece that exploded my mind and transported me to an unforgettable galactic adventure where good triumphed over evil. But that admiration has now turned to disdain. Disney, after acquiring the franchise, destroyed all the nostalgia I held so dear. Episode 7, despite its flaws, still managed to hold things together. But Episodes 8 and 9 demolished the legacy of Star Wars, leaving it on the brink of death. A brief glimmer of hope emerged with "The Mandalorian." We believed that Disney had finally understood what the fans wanted. But the illusion soon shattered, giving way to a torrent of mediocre content. The infamous "Acolyte" was the final nail in the coffin of Star Wars. Disney seems more interested in pushing political and ideological agendas than in simply telling good stories. They sacrifice quality for profit, hiring incompetent friends and cronies of the King (and Queen) instead of talented professionals. 180 million dollars were wasted on the "Acolyte" series, while a movie like Dune was made for the same amount. They could have made 10 Godzilla Minus One movies with that money! This is pure and simple money laundering. They fund this ideological and political war of the King's (and Queen's) friends and cronies, ignoring the pleas of the loyal fanbase that just wants a good story, just wants to escape from the real world for a few minutes. The 86% disapproval rating on Rotten Tomatoes is a reflection of what Disney has done to Star Wars: a complete abomination. And anyone who disagrees is labeled a misogynist, homophobic, or whatever. They destroyed the few good memories of my childhood and the nostalgia I felt for Star Wars. Enough is enough! My time consuming Disney, Marvel, and Star Wars is over. No more giving my hard-earned money to this soulless corporation. If I could, I would demand a refund for all the games I've bought. We need to send a message to these white-collar vultures: boycott, cancel Disney Plus! Stop consuming Disney content. If you want to watch their movies, download them from torrents. Games? Pirate Bay. Shirts and statues? Artisans and sculptors with no ties to these scumbags! Enough feeding this institution that only destroys and corrupts. Let's value true audiovisual art, made with love and respect. Or let's move on and focus on other hobbies, leaving this in the past. FAREWELL!

Another fun review! I like all your old school references!

So Torbin, who was stated to be a Jedi master when he offed himself after mediating for 16 years, was a padawan on the initial mission. How did he go from padawan to master while doing nothing but meditating? How do Jedi promotions works?

Snarky just had her "The Producers" moment where the audience, walking out the theatre both repulsed and offended by 'Springtime for Hitler', suddenly realise its quite the comedy and return to their seats in fits of laughter 😂

Genuinely Snarky.. You're weekly hilarious poke at The Acolyte makes my night.. You have me in stitches every week, keep it up! 😂 (shame it's the last one next week) 😢 You're RU-vid is gold!

Gotta say you have been killing it in the content game! This video was awesome keep up being you been really enjoying all your content!

They possessed the wookie jedi master who knew Torbin got possessed and knew he guarded his mind. But apparently Kelnacca is not as powerful as this newly instructed padawan. REALLY??????

The best part of the Acolyte are your reviews of it. Keep the hilarity flowing.

OMG you made me laugh out loud a few times! It was great seeing you with the Critical Drinker and friends a week ago.

Snarky, I really enjoyed this video and the content that you put out. Yourself, Drinker and Nerdrotic are my top 3 content creators for this area. It's similar content but three very different flavours which makes it really fun to watch. I really think that you're on your way to 1M subscribers. All the best! Looking forward to the next review :)

In the words of Count Dooku: I’ve been looking forward to this

What I found unbelievable as I sat through that god awful ‘Grey’s Anatomy’ style end credits song was the fact that, buried deep in the credits, they have a ‘Star Wars Lore Advisor’!!! Jesus wept - he’s either a moron or was resolutely ignored at every turn.

SOL PICKING OUT GRASS WAS IT FOR ME 😂

8:07 The only thing I can think of is the facility may have been built on top of an underground methane deposit, that was actually leaking up into the facility. Which would mean that all of the witches were actually high af the whole time and every demonstration of power was actually a form of delusion and hallucinations. The leader forgot that she actually slept with Sol years ago and ran off with the kids after he refused to leave the order. Sol had been secretly looking for his daughters this whole time because he sense the pregnancy the last time he saw the mother. Then, after seeing their behavior in the forest, decided that Osha was the better candidate to be inducted into the Jedi Order. The real cover up is really just the secret of Sol not being a virgin.

"Looking for the dignity Disney once had" HA! Great stuff Jay, thanks.

$180 million for a wookie holding a metal detector. There was a dream that was star wars and they flushed it down the toilet

Greetings from Argentina!! Thank you SJ for all of your videos, i love how you speak what everyone is thinking about these series!! Keep it up! Ps The crow is also my favorite movie of all time!!

First time viewer of your channel. I love your commentaries and your humor(I get it)! Good analysis with WIT- Thanks!

How come Sol could hear OSHAs outside the fort through mountains but couldn’t realize Mae had switched with Osha in the ship. Crazy S**

I give you a lot of credit for being able to finish that dumpster fire that is The Acolyte

So that's why the bridge scene seemed so familiar to me. It was from The Good Son! I watched that movie multiple times when I was younger and happened to re-watch it only a few years ago. Thanks, Snarky Jay!

I was watching an interview with Lesley Hedland that basically broke down to people not understanding the High Republic, to which I thought: “yeah, because nobody read those books.” Disney is using their own canon for this show, and it doesn’t work for anyone that’s outside of that…which is most of us 😂

Nice "electric boogaloo" reference. Kudos.

I need to know why the squid game guy operates a large Ghostbusters trap in the beginning of the episode. And not in the end when he could capture the smoking girls...

"Breakin' 2: Electric Boogaloo" reference for the win!

Love your critiques - you put them accross so elequently with a ton of humour.... and snark ❤

I think it was the critical drinker, but someone compared the old witch to 'the wise one' otter from South Park and I can't unsee it.

Dumbest scene ever: Once Indara dispelled Kelnacca, all the witches die. Who writes this shit? A.I. can write better. Sol didn’t even intentionally kill Aniseya. She was doing some Raiders of the Lost Ark shit with demons coming out of her and he only whipped it out to protect himself and it looked like Mae (who Sol mistook for Osha) was ready to disappear into ash like Spider-Man in Infinity War. Then you can see Sol’s stunned face when Aniseya went back to human form and she’s dead. Then Sol doesn’t even attack Koril. It was an accidental kill and Indara had to lie about it to protect Sol. None of this was cold-blooded murder. Why did Torbin feel so guilty about it? The one who should feel the most guilty is Sol. And that’s the only one Mae should’ve targeted to avenge her mother’s death. I think the writers didn’t want to include another fight scene with Torbin fighting Mae. Their $180M budget wasn’t enough for it. So when he drinks the poison, it adds more mystery to what happened in Brendok only to discover he did nothing wrong. And if Torbin speaks more, he can spoil the story. Ep. 4 has a deleted scene of Kelnacca fighting. Why not include it? The episodes are already shorter than they should be. Let’s go back to Ahsoka from last year. So a Jedi Master in Indara can get killed by a small fruit knife but Sabine is totally fine after a lightsaber cuts through her abdomen? Sol is too weak to Force hold the twins that he had to choose only one but Sabine can Force push a grown ass man up to a ship when she couldn’t even push a cup a couple of episodes earlier? A spiritual entity can be killed by a lightsaber but Sabine can’t while in human flesh? Even if you combined Ep. 4 & 5 together, it still didn’t offer any new info or be as long as some of the House of the Dragon episodes. F**k this show! This was the big reveal after three episodes of mostly nothing? The only good part from this show is Manny Jacinto and the cool kills The Stranger committed. Smilo Ren can Force push 8 Jedis and Force pull a redshirt Jedi into his Sith kebab but Sol can’t do this with one of the little girls. I will stick to House of the Dragon and wait patiently for Andor S2 next year. I would rather watch Daemon Targaryen become Bob Vila / Tim “The Toolman” Taylor and help renovate Harrenhal in his The Money Pit (1986) subplot than watch more of this Lesbian Headland shit. The Acolyte: D Ep. 1: D+ Ep. 2: C- Ep. 3: D+ Ep. 4: D Ep. 5: B- Ep. 6: D Ep. 7: D The Boys S4: C+ Ep. 1: C+ Ep. 2: A- Ep. 3: B Ep. 4: A- Ep. 5: C- Ep. 6: D+ House of the Dragon S2: B+ Ep. 1: B Ep. 2: A- Ep. 3: C+ Ep. 4: A

Changing my internet provider, they said "we're gonna hook u up with disney+ for free" and i said that wasnt necessary as a reflex

Appreciate the struggle you have to go through to give us this content 😄 🤣 you're amazing 👏