God, Tom's mother is a real piece of work. Standing right in front of him saying things like "he'll never be able to achieve anything", and ridiculous comments like "this is make or break, if he doesn't change now he'll be like this forever". He's a teenager love, autism or not, that statement is just ludicrous...if that's what she says on national television, imagine what she says when the cameras aren't there. Little wonder he showed improvement when he moved away from her initially. Then she drags the poor bloke to Cornwall, and he again proves her wrong again by making friends and excelling at something he is passionate about. What an awful, awful woman. Could genuinely hear the disappointment in her voice when she was "praising" him at the end for all the good he's achieving. Hope he got away from her. RIP Alex, what a kind soul. It's always the good ones
Alex was such a gentleman, he might have not been recognized as fully functioning adult, but his manners and his unique charm is something not all people posses. I'll say it again, a true gentleman. May your soul find rest, Alex. I was shocked to know the world had lost someone like him so early.
Thank you, sir, Alex was all of those things. The true travesty is that he was so close to being an independent and confident man, just spreading his wings.
Matt Jameson VERY sad and completely unfair to lose such a charismatic, intelligent, caring person as Alex so soon. I'm not sure your belief system, but I try to take solace in the belief that he's where he should be and his soul is at peace. You'll see him again.
I work in autism, I feel so sorry for Tom and his support network is apporling. The negativity from his mum breaks my heart. I wish you all the luck Tom. Hopefully somebody in your life will be understanding the the daily obstacles you have to face and give you some positive support.
Hi there everybody, thank you all for your kind words over the last two years, it has helped me through some very dark times. I have a bit of a favour to ask: Alex is in my thoughts every single day. At the time of his stupidly early passing, he was working on a story (book) about a sort of medieval A-Team, which was called The League Of Great Talent. I am trying to finish it for him, but I've made him the main character, the hero, and made it so that all the members recruited to the league are Autists (people with different ASD's but that shows in this world as special powers) It's all his world-building and history, background, locations and some characters, but set 100 yrs after his timeline and expanded with the powers and stuff. I was thinking of putting the chapters up on here, to see if you guys like it and maybe give me some feedback on what's right and what's not? It might be a cool thing to try and publish when it's finished. When you think about it, ASD is a superpower! I have the first chapter sort of how I like it, halfway through the second. It'll run to about ten chapters in the first book I think, with idea's for two more. The first chapter is about 6,000 words. What do you think? Is it something you might be interested in reading?
I think it's a wonderful idea! I'm a reader, I'd be more than happy to read it. I hope you and everyone else in his life are getting on okay, you can tell he was such a beautiful man 💖
If I met up with Oli, I would be so honored to. He'd be a big help to further be among those I communicated with and talked to. He reminds me of my other friends similar to him who have great knowledge.
I love this I was told my son has autism he is 3 this gives me hope so much hope and if I just push and love my baby he will be fine I'm thankful for this u made my day well my life thank u
Eddie Hjalmarsson, she's burnt out, angry, scared, and tired. It would be for everybody's health and welfare if Tom was in a group home. He needs skills and counseling. He isn't going to get what he needs out in the boonies. Neither is his mom. You can't move away from your problems most of the time.
@@samtrujillojr I've seen you reply to most people who criticised Tom's mum. A mother's job is to be kind, respectful and positive. I was told the same stuff when i was his age but unfortunately for them, i did just perfectly fine so please, stop excusing the inexcusable.
@@skfunk4550 I have an autistic son. Every kid on the spectrum is like a snowflake - completely unique. If what they are doing isn't working, it's not going to work in a new location. The services and therapies are there for a reason. For her son's sake they need to try a different care regimen. Maybe he needs to be in a group home. Autistic kids don't act out because of temper or will - it all has to do with the way their brains interpret the world around them. If you add a volatile home situation and/or care giver burn out their stims will get worse and so will their behavior in general. Moving away from services is NOT the right choice. You are confusing a malformed brain with "bad" behavior. You do this young man a grave disservice. Mom's not a bad mom - she's burned out and needs to let go and let others help him learn a new skill set.
As a mother myself, I do agree that Toms mom was a bit too protective, but I also understand why she was. She had a lot on her plate raising several children (two of them on the spectrum), dealing with a major move to Cornwall, etc.
Both my children have Autism, Nothing in life prepares you with how to deal with it, You think its hard until you wonder How hard it is for THEM, I try my best every day to learn and to understand them to make their life easier
The music that’s played when Tom comes on is so sad. I really hope that dude is now doing good. He’s clearly misunderstood and I bet he’d be one of the most faithful friends a person could have.
toms mum needs to learn to give him independence as its making him get frustrated as she's molly cuddling him and he won't be able to grow up if she doesn't xx
@Matt Jameson. As someone who has what your brother has you have my deepest sympathies mate, I can't imagine how hard it must be even three years on and not seeing him. RIP ALEX. Also your mother is like my mother when it comes to me and my Aspergers, someone who is supportive but not coddling me and tell me that they don't believe I have a future, unlike Tom's mum. His mum, well I'm sure her heart was in the right place, was going about in all the wrong way at times. Sometimes they just need someone to be there, but know that they believe in you to make your own decisions and embrace you autism/aspergers, I feel that the fact that I had support and was never held back in anything helped me to become more confident and proud to say I have aspeges and I am proud of it. Anyway, just wanted to say it's very tragic what happened to your brother and I really wish a facebook page was set up so that I could show my sympathy.
Thanks for the kind words there mate. Alex is in my thoughts every single day. At the time of his stupidly early passing, he was working on a story about a sort of medieval A-Team, which was called The League Of Great Talent. I am trying to finish it for him, but I've made him the main character, the hero, and made it so that all the members recruited to the league are Autists (people with different ASD's but that shows in this world as special powers) It's all his world-building and history, background, locations and some characters, but set 60 yrs after his timeline and expanded with the powers and stuff. I was thinking of putting the chapters up on here, to see if you guys like it and maybe give me some feedback on what's right and what's not? It might be a cool thing to try and publish when it's finished. When you think about it, ASD is a superpower! I have the first chapter sort of how I like it, halfway through the second. It'll run to about ten chapters in the first book I think, with idea's for two more. The first chapter is about 6,000 words. What do you think? Is it something you might be interested in reading?
What really saddens me in the documentary are the mothers. Ollie's folks seemed great, but Tom's mum seems very manipulative and abusive. I get it must be hard having six children, but she made it out like Tom wasn't capable of doing anything, especially saying he had no future in front of him. Alex's mum didn't seem much better, did she really have to go with her 25 year old son every time he went out? How was he supposed to learn independence, (especially as I think I read something somewhere from Kirsty saying that she made them break up)? RIP Alex, very sad to hear of his passing, hopefully one day they'll do another update documentary with the other two, hopefully their luck changed after this and the first one were made, does anyone know what they're doing now?
Sadly, society can be very cruel. I just hope your twins are better treated throughout their life, than I have been. I'm an identical twin, but my sister doesn't have autism or the other conditions I have, one of them being Hydrocephalus. I get bugger all for help, like thousands of other people. 🙄
@@kristinayoung6535, having high functioning autism doesn't mean one 'functions highly'. It's a misleading description. I have ridiculously only just been diagnosed at the age of 46, but have received NO help. My twin sister, meanwhile, lives a very successful life in Germany. I feel like I don't exist. It's horrendous. I really hope your twins succeed in life.
Not only does Tom’s mum hold him back by being over protective, she also is completely selfish for moving them all to Cornwall where he can’t meet anyone. She goes on how it’s what SHE wanted, without caring what her kids thought. I’ve worked with autistic kids and it is hard, but she needs to sort out her parenting skills.
Agreed. Watching this years on.. I 100% agree that she doesn’t even know her own son and know what he wants. He desires to have friends but she moved away to an isolated area of the country like why? I don’t think she’s right in the head herself. I sense delusions of grandeur!
Alexander Blake, Tom needs to be in a group home. The risk of violence toward his family is too great. The more independent he becomes the less frustrated he will be. He needs to learn more coping skills. My autistic son is now at the point where he lives independently in an apartment at University. It was rough at first but now he is in a comfortable routine. He comes home to visit (30 miles away) as often as he pleases. A daily commute was out of the question because (he may never be able to drive) a long commute was to stressful. Tom needs to figure out ways that he can be dependent and his confidence will increase and his stress/aggression will decrease. I'm sure his folks are stressed and almost at a breaking point. But isolation is not healthy for Tom probably.
Unlike Tom's mum, my mum was very supportive of me, went to hell and back to get me the support I needed and help me to find others who were like me and in term that built up my confidence, she never isolated me from the world and coddled me, she was comforting to me but knew when to be firm with me and tell me straight despite how I might have acted. She was firm and fair and never over protective unlike what Tom's mum seems to be.
tom is my boyfriend ( 6 years now ) he has a facebook like page called "standing ovation productions",... he recorded me when he was at uni and now has a honours degree in audio and music production :) hope this helps :)
It varies. The classic signs are the social skills where they don't want to speak to people I had those as a child. Sometimes there's lack of understanding of other people's emotions.
Hi Brittany, I just wanted to say that all the best and most inventive people throughout history, most of them were or are on the Autistic spectrum. It is your unique way of seeing the world that allows such innovations!
My brother had Epilepsy as well as Asbergers Syndrome, and sometimes if he had a fit while sleeping he would stop breathing for a few moments. We think he had two fits one after the other and just didn't start breathing again. He was really, really unlucky.
Zack Mcginley Alex was 32 when he passed, which is no age at all really is it? I have already had 10 more years of life. If I could give him some of my years I would gladly do it. He was a genuinely kind and innocent person, so lovely. I really miss him badly. My kid brother. Life's so arbitrary, it's not fair at all.
These people have brain AIDs I'd be that young man's friend, I'm an aspie, the things we sacrifice for the talents we gain... in this world we are misunderstood hopefully there is a better place, toms mum is strange
There’s nothing wrong with autistic people But I am not autistic I don’t think I am anyway But, you treat everybody the same way you’d like to be treated Always
