i wish this video had more views. this is such an important point in all aspects of being trans, yet such a difficult one to convey. the language used to express the point is very, very difficult to arrange in a way that doesn't sound discouraging, or even transphobic to some people. i've cowered away from saying it to people who needed to hear it, because i was too scared they would interpret 'you will always be trans' as 'you will never be what you want to be'. i regret that cowardice, because even if it were to make someone upset with me personally, it probably would have helped anyway. it's impossible for someone to be happy transitioning if they're trying to turn into a cis version of the other gender, because despite everything we _can_ change, the past is set in stone. we can be reborn, but we can't literally go back into the womb to emerge as something else. and there's nothing wrong with that, because what you came out as isn't what defines you in the first place.
Self-criticism is so hard because it can be really useful for improvement, but just as easily can shut down all progress and make you feel miserable. Gotta try to remind oneself that we have our own bias, and are often much harsher on ourselves than others would be. Thanks for the video! Also love to see a Contrapoints reference 😊
I started voice training pretty recently, and had some pretty fast progress within just a couple of weeks (music background and have always had a knack for doing voices and such), and after hearing my voice recorded, for the 1st time ever I didn't hate it, it was pretty euphoric 😭! But now when listening to these same recordings it can be easy to just nitpick it to death and not feel satisfied enough with it (which I try to use as a means to improve), but there is a fear there that I'm glad to see validated that I'll "never be good enough", that I'll get used to every new threshold I reach and never be satisfied. So it's very helpful for me to reframe it in my mind, by thinking about how much progress I've made in such a short period of time, or how everyone I showed my girl voice recordings to was blown away by it, even if I can only hear how it could be better. Thanks for the validation and all the help 💜
I just saw that Dr. K and Contrapoints video a few days ago, and I loved it. If I had to recommend one video to help with someone's mental health during transition, it's that vid. They go over a lot of topics and each one is a massive step in being able to combat dysphoric thinking. If you're the type of person mentioned at the beginning of this video, please watch it.
Why you give me feelings q.q Very nicely said, that's something I struggle with a lot lately. Working on an ok sounding falsetto voice becouse I just can't stand my voice below a pitch of 300hz...
"If you place superiority in being a cis woman, and you don't fully accept yourself as a trans woman, it is very hard to find peace in transition" holy shit I think I just had a revelation
that has been one of my biggest issues. As I transitions, I could look in the mirror and see all of these changes, but the voice I heard my ears is the same because transwomen’s voices don’t go back up. So it has been hell excepting my voice as a woman’s voice when it is so attached in my ears to the person that was seen as a man for so many years.
