The Impossible Prayer - Louie Giglio 

I feel like I understand what you've been through, at least on an emotional level. I find comfort in knowing that if God has not granted what I have asked (and really want) Him to do in my prayers, it is because my requests in pray are not rooted in His Will, His Plan. But, we must trust in our faith that He knows far better than us. We are simply unable to see and understand everything His Will encompasses. The following may not make sense to anyone but me -- I was brought up in a Catholic home and attended Catholic schools. Like many in my childhood peer group, I denounced the Catholic church in my mid-20s. I declared myself to be an agnostic, meaning I wasn't sure if God existed or didn't exist. By my mid-30s, I had concluded that God couldn't possibly exist. I was no longer torn between God existing and not existing. I declared myself to be an atheist. Quite a bit of my decision was placed upon being a child victim of sexual abuse for almost 4 years. I simply could not understand how it was possible for an Almighty God with ABSOLUTE control to ever be able to allow me and any child to be abused as I had. I just couldn't accept that all I needed was to have faith. I spent a lot of time in self-reflection, but I continued to live with a metaphoric hole in my heart. About 12 years later, I began to question my decision to declare myself an atheist. I had several marketed experiences between choosing to be an atheist and my starting to question if I was fully committed to being an atheist. I don't have an earthly reason why, but I decided to ask, REALLY & TRULY ASK that if God did exist, that he would somehow reveal himself to me. I was not looking for lightening to strike or for God to send me a letter in the mail to prove His existence (or non-existence) to me. So, I decided that kneeling was something I needed to do b/c I felt that my kneeling would show my full sincerity and my willingness to be completely submissive IF there was a God AND He revealed himself to me (I wanted God to meet me on MY terms; When I should have been doing the exact opposite. However, I did not realize this at the time. In fact, if someone had pointed out that by getting on my knees, I was somehow being submissive to God, I would have been outta there in immediately. So, I was sincere, and I do mean SINCERE, in my quest to know God (of He existed). Anyway, I realized that in Catholic Mass, I had always been told repeatedly where to look during prayer. I decided to kneel out of respect and to pray to a blue chair in the corner of my bedroom. Because, I still didn't think God existed, the blue chair seemed as adequate as any item I chose to pray to. I did quite. It was difficult, at first. It's a bit unusual to Actually pray to a chair. I did this for 3 nights in a row, and each time all I asked was "If God exists, please reveal yourself to me." Three nights, nothing. Three days, nothing. Over the following 36-38 hours, I had a COMPLETELY INDESCRIBABLE experience. It didn't take long to recognize that all of my anxiety disappeared. However, the biggest impact was provided by God, Our God. However, within a few months, I began to experience a plethora of "coincidences". They weren't coincidences, at all. It was simply life in all it's individualism. ..... I will finish typing on my personal laptop one morning in the very near future. --- Bea XO

U

Keep the faith! I can relate in some small way. God always vomes through... Always. I pray He will not only provide but sustain and maintain! Hold on and trust God. He will not let you and your 2 special gift children all alone! 🤗

In the name of Jesus I speak against the works of the devil coming against this family. Our Lord is greater than anything that can come against us. Lord you are the God of life in abundance, you are the Lord of provision. I stand in agreement with you Lord that your children receive your provision and are truly healed and whole in your name with all their needs provided for.

P

Praying for your son!

So glad it was helpful to you!

Psalm 34:18 The LORD is close to the brokenhearted and saves those who are crushed in spirit. Psalm 147:3 He heals the brokenhearted and binds up their wounds. Jeremiah 29:11 For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the LORD, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future. Praying for you Phillip that you receive the strength and comfort that comes from the Lord. You are not alone. Trust in Him and seek guidance, He mends broken hearts. He has a good and prosperous plan for you and I pray you receive a revelation today that enables you to see his love surrounding you and drawing you closer to his embrace where all things are possible. In him their is only yes and amen. Much love

Praying for your mother, Jordan!