It's a shame when teachers present Scriptures and then explain them falsely. The irony of quoting Hebrews 4:9 to make your case is heartbreaking. Of course, a relationship is core to knowing Him. And in loving Him, do we not keep His Commandments? Did not Jesus say "If you love Me, keep my Commandments" ? And in 1 John "By this, we know that we know Him, if we keep His Commandments."