The Peril & Promise Of "Second Selfing" 

Hey Doc Z . Not related to this video but when are you and Vinay going to take on the subject of Jay Battacharia joining this lawsuit against Fauci and Twitter and the rest of the clowns who censored him and his colleagues? Can’t really think of anything more important than making sure this doesn’t happen again.

Yo! Yes! Since I’ve scaled back on the social media I’m so much more productive and I enjoy the time I have with my IRL friends! The only thing I do daily is BeReal now. I’ve scaled right back on social media. It’s pretty freeing tbh!

We don't even have one self; I don't get this. 😂

All the world's a stage, I suppose. Now more than ever.

There is also the reverse phenomenon in that you can let others project upon you a kind of 'self' that you know isn't right, but you let it ride. So, you portray a false personhood not by commission, but by omission. If that fake image feels flattering, then you might be enticed to amplify that persona (that 'parasocial projection'), and even convince oneself that maybe everyone else is right, and you are not in touch with that 'true' self, but are 'audience captured'. My only divergence from what you say is that I've felt the pull of others' false or invalid projections and enhanced my 'second self' by accident, not by design. The same thing happens in romantic relationships. It is hard to correct someone else's attraction to you when it is so easy to take advantage of it!

You may be interested in Professor Hans-Georg Moeller who has the youtube channel "Carefree Wondering". He has written on his concept of profilicity vs authenticity. He talks about how we have a profile that we project to the world that is an increased thing because of social media, and we have long since given up on our authentic selves. Also has a cool video recently on the hippy movement because they were a group that did start as authenticity, but at a certain point, having long hair and wearing certain clothes became part of the 'hippy profile'.

I hope this is in line with what you’re saying. I’ve thought about the psychology of people who commit suicide when being stalked on media. I think it was Pema Chodron who said that everyone has a soft, vulnerable spot. In my mind, people protect this spot via their self-image, that which they want to be seen and think themselves as. As it isn’t the real and authentic you, your self-image easily falls apart when questioned or attacked. When that happens, you feel completely vulnerable. You come face to face with a ‘no self’ that is seen as emptiness and death. Now when someone attacks you on a media site the fact that you can’t see your attacker means you can’t project your self-image to protect yourself. That in turns leaves you feeling completely vulnerable. In effect, the invisible attacker has become the personification of the emptiness you’ve been trying to avoid. This leads some people to commit suicide to avoid the emptiness of no self. Death becomes more appealing to them than having their self-image stripped away. I don’t know if my thinking here is correct but thought I’d pass it on in the event it is of some use.

Just one of me is PLENTY for others & even myself!😂😂😂 🤗

Wow great video. Thanks for everything you post. Your book and reference suggestions are helpful and informative too. In an older video you introduced me to Eckhart Tolle, and he’s amazing too. Many thanks and plz keep up the good work.

I’m really enjoying this discussion 😊

Takes a big person to admit wrong and show real growth from learning the difference between wrong and right.

It’s interesting. I remember the video you made right before the tramdemic was just a whisper, and you and most of us thought it was contained. It’s crazy that the world has changed so much since then. Actually I found you though the Hoffman video just before that. It is interesting that many people put on display several selfs, depending on the context. I haven’t watched you in a while, but I’m grateful I found this one, I don’t know you from Adam, but you seem to have a desire to know truth, you’re a seeker like many of us (at least your second self implies this 🫥). This is great guidance and caution. Thank you.

This is SO great! My husband started a RU-vid channel last year and it has been really difficult to navigate. You’ve touched on so many things that we have encountered. I’m sharing this with him as well.❤

Aww you should have said this long ago...so useful. Thanks

Interesting and insightful content, but the constant interjection of commercials is becoming unbearable on RU-vid. I'll look for your podcasts.

It’s funny how that happens when I have a video on You Tube and I don’t look at the metrics and all of a sudden I have 3k views. Most of my videos are under 30 seconds, though. LOL.

I learn so much from your videos. I did get upset with some of your videos but by stepping back and opening my mind, I was able to come to terms with them and accept that even though I agree with most of what you say, I'm certainly not going to like everything you say. And that's ok.

Absolutely I’m a troll on Twitter because it’s fun Twitter is the digital chalkboard in the men’s room of a bar trying to be hip . Instagram Facebook is family. But still idol banter . Church and one to one is real life.

Thank you for this video! There are so many pitfalls, reinforced by the mob mentality and keyboard warriors who attack others behind the wall of anonymity. We appear to have lost the capacity for dialog, and acting in good faith, resorting to argumentum ad baculum. ll

I’ve started getting AARP letters and ads. LOL. Right after I turned 49. 😂😂😂

This is not entirely new in human history it just has not had the scale it has now with social media. Caesars and religious leaders had this second self. Sadly most of them sucked at it and were completely captured by the masses of people they led.

comparing social media to crack and slot machines is a great metaphor especially when you started talking about metrics and how people can be captured as well, hope people wake up to how dangerous this can all be with second self-ing

Thank you for speaking on this. I just listened to your most recent podcast with Dr. Sinha and you touched on this towards the end of it.

Interesting how many times you use the word narcissistic, just sayin'.🙄

ZDogg, so glad your still around I just realised that I haven’t seen you in my feeds lately on all the socials. Thought you went offline Know I know it’s an Algo thing Keep it ip

Will you interview Dr Aseem Malhotra please

Thank you, never heard of this

I never smash that like button because then if it's broken no one else can use it ☹️ So instead, I just, gently... consider it. Give it a wink, a delicate pat, a peck maybe? 😳😏 Lovely discussion once again. Very interesting the way you brought these concepts, the way you named them, mostly stuff I'm (or I think we're) all aware, but wouldn't put it this way. I'm an artist and I love me the dopamine rush of feedback, especially comments, and being someone who cares A LOT about too much things in life, it's been hard in my earlier days to deal with anything challenging my claims, or criticisms in general, especially the less constructive, more heinous kind. A big part of who I am is considering anything the other party has to say, because I think it's important if you want a legitimate discussion. But I've learned to let go a bit and loosen up the stakes. Take things less personally. It's hard, and I still fall into the trap a lot, especially because I'm typically veru fatigued and emotional admittedly, but I digress. I'm not in any way popular and most feedback in my circle is otherwise pretty positive and sensible, but yeah, being me, I'd fear being a celeb. I don't know how I'd be able to deal with the masses. I guess I'd have no choice but to change in some fundamental ways, or I'll hurt myself real bad.

I totally get you and it’s nice to hear

Great talk I only joined Instagram during the pandemic and Twitter 6 weeks ago and what a time suck😂. I took the last month off Instagram and only go on Twitter twice a day for short periods. Happy Holidays to you & your family🎉🎅🏻☃️⭐️

I really enjoyed this discussion and introspection. It’s been nice to see your evolution

I fear that social media enables me to put out too much of my real self that no one really should see. Typically anonymously. Still...

Thank you!

GREAT show!! Love this kind of stuff

This was great 👍

Nice explanation zogg 👌 Esther Perel eat your heart out 😋

First up! Hi from Folsom Z!

COVID brought me you 😊

"Dick Damania"... :)