I absolutely believe this. I’ve experienced it in my own life. I’ll add that, in order to prepare for the teshuva after my sin, I go out of my way to perform other mitzvos. Teshuva is as easy as going from East to West, but, usually I have to build confidence by righting other things in my life first. In that way, my sin has prompted me to prepare for and perform many other mitzvot. And those other mitzvot are preparation for my teshuva
I asked the prior question because a I have heard of many different people who had a PARENT that has now been dead for quite a few years and all of this parents life they told that child/now adult that they had "MADE him/her(the Child), and that at any time that they the parent wanted to the parent could take them the child out(kill them)". The reason that this parent had an only child/now adult was so that they would have someone to control and abuse for their own pleasure the whole of their the parents life. So this parent would do things like tell the child to NOT eat a single cookie out of bag of cookies that were his favorite cookies that the parent would INTENTIONALLY THEN LEAVE those cookies on the table on a dish spread out in the open where anyone could eat them, and you know that the child that is only 5 years old at the time IS DEFINITELY GOING TO EAT THOSE COOKIES. So anyhows the PARENT KNOWS that that child WILL eat a cookie if not all of them, and then that that child will say something like someone entered into the house that was not him the child and ate them cookies. So the PARENT KNEW EVEN BEFORE THEY TOLD THE CHILD TO NOT EAT THE COOKIES THAT they the PARENT was GOING TO HAVE TO PUNISH THE CHILD SEVERELY FOR EATING THOSE COOKIES. So the PARENT NOW BEATS THE CHILD BLOODY, maybe even breaks bones in the childs body, maybe even kills the child, ALL so that this PARENT can get the PLEASURE THAT THEY CONTINUOUSLY WANT FROM THIS CHILD BECAUSE ALL FORMS OF CHILD/NOW ADULT ABUSE BRING THIS PARENT JOY JOY AND HAPPYNESS. So basically when the child is doing the good that the PARENT wants done the PARENT IS HAPPY BEYOND DELIGHT, then when the child does the EVIL that the PARENT INTENTIONALLY EITHER DIRECTLY GUIDES the child into doing, OR INDIRECTLY COVERTLY GUIDES THE CHILD INTO DOING, the PARENT is STILL HAPPY BEYOND BELIEF BECAUSE the PARENT NOW GETS TO HURT THE CHILD MAYBE EVEN MURDER the CHILD FOR SUCH A PETTY SIN, JUST SO THE PARENT CAN GET THE JOY JOY AND EXTREME PLEASURE OF DOING SUCH A BRUTAL FORM OF ABUSE UPON THE CHILD BRINGS THAT PARENT.. So what type of PERSONALITY is that kind of PERSON CALLED? What do you call a person who lives off of both the HAPPYNESS they can bring a victim/s by doing good to the victim/s, and who also gets extreme happyness when they bring a victim/s EXTREME PAIN AND SUFFERING after doing EVIL(the evil I mean is when a person COVERTLY GUIDES a person to COMMIT a sin against them(the attacker) so that they(the attacker) can then PUNISH THEM the victim/s EXTREMELY with SEVERE PHYSICAL ILLNESS, like broken bones or black eyes, any illness, and such)..
I have another question for you Rabbi. If I were a man of EXTREME KNOWLEDGE and IT WAS IN MY FULL ABILITY TO GENETICALLY ENGINEER a PLANT that could live with extreme low amounts of water maybe 1 inch of water per year, and the more water this plant got, IT the plant that I GENETICALLY ENGINEERED would do even BETTER the MORE WATER IT GETS. So one day I set this plant out on the farm and I tell it that it has to STAY PUT in the dryest part of the garden and that if IT SPREADS to the WELL WATERED PARTS OF THE GARDEN that I WOULD KILL IT! THE TEMPTATION I SET FORTH WAS ALL THE WATER IT COULD EVER GET! I ALREADY KNEW IT WOULD FAIL THIS TEST.. So for the first few weeks the plant stayed where it was put, but then when it saw all the other plants drinking as much water as they wanted, the plant then says to itself "I am GOING TO TAKE ALL THE WATER I CAN AS WELL AND SPREAD WHERE EVER I WANT!", AND THEN DOES JUST THAT whose FAULT was it that this plant is SPREADING all over the garden to the well watered parts of the GARDEN? OF COURSE IF WE TELL THE TRUE TRUTH IT IS I THE TRUE GENETIC ENGINEERS FAULT, for IF I TRUELY DID NOT WANT THAT PLANT SPREADING TO THE WELL WATERED PARTS OF THE GARDEN and SPREADING LIKE WILD FIRE I WOULD HAVE GENETICALLY ENGINEERED INTO THE GENETIC CODE OF THAT PLANT THAT IF IT TOOK IN MORE WATER THAN I WANTED IT TO TAKE IN at any time, first it would get sick, and if it continued IT WOULD GET VERY SICK AND DIE. So since I DID NO SUCH THING IT IS ALL MY FAULT RIGHT?? ANYONE who BUILDS something no matter what it is, is at fault when the ITEM no matter what it is FAILS before its expected lifetime, unless the item has been abused or used incorrectly or expected to fail. The example: we now have cell phones that have in their software a program that INTENTIONALY causes the lithium batteries to FAIL after a very short time. Normally a battery of that type has a lifetime of well over 30 years if not longer, but some of those new cell phones die only after a few years. It is called I think PLANNED OBSOLESCENE. In other words they INTENTIONALLY CAUSE AN ITEM TO FAIL IN A CERTAIN AMOUNT OF TIME SO THAT YOU HAVE TO BUY A NEW ONE. THAT WAY THEY CAN SELL YOU A NEW ONE AND MAKE MORE MONEY, while when you trade in your old device they give you PENNIES on the dollar for it then put in a new battery and resell it for WAY WAY WAY more money than they gave you for it as a trade in. I am TIRED OF THE WHOLE UNIVERSE FOR NOT TAKEING THE FULL BLAME FOR WHAT IT OR THEY HAVE DONE TO SO MANY. A man GENETICALLY ENGINEERS AND CREATES a new plant, and it spreads like WILDFIRE KILLING all the OTHER PLANTS, when WILL THAT PERSON TAKE FULL RESPONSIBILITY FOR DOING SUCH A WICKED WORK, be it UNINTENTIONAL or INTENTIONAL, and UNDO WHAT THEY HAVE DONE?? NO INSTEAD THEY BLAME THE PLANT when it was THEIR FAILURE TO NOT PROGRAM INTO THAT PLANTS CODE THAT THE PLANT WOULD GET SICK THEN VERY VERY SICK AND THEN FINALLY DIE IF IT DID DRINK MORE WATER than the GENETIC ENGINEER wanted it the plant to drink. Not even men that claim to BE GODS(maybe not even GOD HIMSELF) stand up and take FULL blame FOR THEIR FAILURES, OR ARE THEY FAILURES!! Did that man INTENTIONALLY want those plants to KILL all the other plants that were out there and to take over his already perfect garden? Just so you know. I have found out via Certificate of Jewish Ancestory that other family relatives that have searched into our spanish GYPSY ancestory through that website that we are part Jew maybe 100th or more part, which I DONT CONSIDER to be a JEW. The proper term is MAMZAR(bastard). I still classify myself as a full GENTILE, for to me to even be classified part JEW or of the 12 true tribes of JACOB you have to be a 50% or more part JEW. In otherwords you have 2 be born of a mother or father that is 100% Jew who marries a father or mother that is PURE gentile that would make you 50% Jew, but you would still be a Mamzar. So lets say you marry a 100% JEW and you are already 50% Jew then your children would be 75% Jew I think. It all depends on the prior purity of blood lines and such though. So even though my cousin runs around calling himself a JEW, yet is a full blood practicing Catholic, I dont CONDIDER MYSELF A JEW, for there is NOT ENOUGH BLOOD to call myself a JEW. So I WONT BOTHER. I AM A GENTILE. I WILL NOT RETURN TO ISRAEL LIKE THE STUPID VOICE THAT TORMENTS ME NIGHT AND DAY TO DO SUCH A THING IS DEMANDING THAT I DO!! I DONT LIKE HEARING HIM IN MY HEAD! HE/THEY SHOULD SHUT THE HELL UP!! He who ever he is DEMANDS that I give all of my families lands to ONE SPECIFIC group of NEIGHBORS that lives RIGHT NEXT TO US ALL FOR FREE, and then that I take all my family and extended family and go BACK HOME TO JERUSALEM as he puts it. I tried to tell this male voice that I WOULD GIVE THE LAND TO CERTAIN PEOPLE that I LIKE and that have ALWAYS BEEN TRUELY GOOD TO ME, or that I just plain like, or to PEOPLE who I WANT TO GIVE THE LANDS TO because I want to give it to them, but NO this MALE VOICE DEMANDS that I give ALL of my families lands to a SPECIFIC GROUP OF PEOPLE, and ONLY this specific group of people. Here is the FUNNY THING. I DONT EVEN OWN ANY OF MY FAMILIES LANDS YET WHO EVER THIS MALE VOICE IS, HE THINKS THAT I AM SOME FORM OF KINGPIN THAT SOMEHOW CONTROLS ALL OF MY FAMILIES LANDS OF OVER 100+acres. WELL I DONT!!! I AM DISABLED AND COULD NOT EVEN BEGIN TO MANAGE SUCH A LARGE DIVIDED UP INTO MANY COUSINS, UNCLES, AUNTS and the LIKE lands. They each own their own piece of land that makes up the whole piece of land, and that is it. This is over 50+ adults with many many many children/grandchildren/ great great grandchildren, and when they get their piece of land, each share will become smaller.. Well anyhows my sister ran out of MONEY to put up the fence that she was putting up on her piece of land. She hired a full blood as far as I know TRUE JEW that is NON-OBSERVANT to any of the JEWISH PRACTICES or BELIEFS, he said he does not get involved with all that STUFF, he just wants to work and make money. So he worked the week before last on sunday, and this past weekend of the Oct 2 on sunday from 10:am to sundown. At first he didnt seem to want to do the job. But suddenly out of no where he called and did the job in 2 days, unfortunately we ran out of fence and money to buy the fence and to do further surveys on the land to put markers as towards where the rest of the fence will go. Just to mark about 1000 foot of land where the fence posts go they charged us about 2000 dollars. So she was only able to do a PART of her land. The fence and labor and survey cost about 6 thousand dollars. So that is ALL the money she had to do this job. Hopefully this comming year she will be able to save enough money to do the 1000+ foot that remains of fence and that does not include the 300 foot of fence that still needs to be put up, the posts are up but she ran out of fence to mount to them. It is a LONG but narrow strip of land. It is about the right width to put a 2 lane highway down the middle of it, and it would still need more land from the adjacent lands to build that highway. The male voice that has been as he put it "GIVING ME THE CALLING TO ISRAEL TO RETURN TO MY TRUE HOMELAND!". He FORCED me by not allowing me to sleep for about 3 days to WRITE a MANIFESTO to my entire family to give to my family that told them all the SPECIFIC neighbors we were to GIVE for FREE ALL of our lands to and to ABSOLUTELY NO ONE ELSE, and then to go to CALIFORNIA. Then he wanted me to die in the street a homeless mentally ill man, but HE RECENTLY TOLD ME THAT HE WANTED FOR MY FAMILY to once they got to California to catch planes to ISRAEL, and then that I was to die in ISRAEL in the streets as a homeless mentally ill man, is I guess what that male voice meant. I dont know who this MALE voice is OR WHO any of its BUDDIES are that TERRORISE me telepathically are, but here is one thing I noticed when I ran across one of those NEIGHBORS that that voice specified that I give all our lands to. He seemed to be TRYING to SHOW me that HE was one of the ONES TELLING me all of this JUNK telepathically. He said "YOU KNOW I HEAR VOICES. They want to give me land. I want that land for FREE. and OTHER COMMENTS like that that seem to go INLINE with the GARBAGE that I am TELEPATHICALLY hearing in HIS VOICE and OTHER NEIGHBORS VOICES! It seemed like he was INTENTIONALLY trying to TELL me that he was doing this to me, but he was to much a COWARD to SAY:(LOOK MAN I AM ONE OF THE ONES INTENTIONALLY TELEPATHICALLY SCREWING YOU UP, JUST GIVE ME YOUR LAND, AND I WILL LEAVE YOU ALONE!!)". Is that man a victim as well, or is he involved in some form of hostile groups OCCULT METHOD of ACQUIRING LANDS FROM VICTIMS by TELEPATHICALLY TERRORISING them until they do just that?? I DONT KNOW, I JUST DONT WANT TO HEAR THEM COVERTLY AND UNPROVABLEY IN MY HEAD TELEPATHICALLY OR TECHNOLOGICALLY IN ANY WAY, SHAPE, OR FORM EVER AGAIN!! THE METHODS THEY USE TO COVERTLY COMMUNICATE ARE FOR TRUELY FACELESS COWARDS ONLY!!!
