The moment we as a society STOP getting advice, opinions and influence from folks who themselves are drowning in trauma( meaning without being in an actual healthy relationship themselves, NOT you Dee!) you will be surprised how quickly the life you live becomes more fulfilling! Seriously, give it a shot!!
🙌🏼🙌🏼🙌🏼 I've cut off so many people who couldn't be happy with me and current status in life. "Becareful with that! That's how it started with my relation..." Good bye! Hater ass! 😂😂😂
I love how Dee clocks everyone irrespective of their gender cause it’s not what she agrees with is so fresh to see cause there are so many sheeps in this world and socials
Throughout history most fathers that stayed in the home were abusive; raging alcoholics, overbearing, etc. But they stayed in the home. Thats y women initiate divorce the most. Men will leave emotionally but stay physically and it causes chaos.
@@Lxqvs Who said anything about staying with men women don't like? My statement is pretty simple: Saying that "MOST" fathers who stayed in the home throughout history are abusive, raging alcoholics is insane. Sounds like an idea pulled out of projection and hate
Yall sound like short dudes. Just accept reality shorty . U can’t shame men into liking what u want them to like. Can a short man shame u into liking him? No. So be quiet except what men like and adapt. All y’all women that be crying are the female version of loser guys.
Honestly I have hatred for both sides (only the toxic ones). I see both sides call the whole gender a slur because of their bad choices in relationships😂
@Demure.Jupiter That's probably because the good people dont have a need for attention, and negative/toxic actions are more appealing to some. If you notice, the bad outweighs the good on the internet.
It’s not a generalization dude, it’s the truth. Do you not see the femicide rate? Oh I wonder who’s doing that. Statistics don’t lie. Instead of whining, hold men accountable. That’s the problem. You dudes continue to tell on yourselves.
It’s not just a man thing.. its a human thing… women will also hate men but still date, sleep with and have kids with them for resources, and/or to not be alone.
@@clumpybakerMen who worship other men and only listen to them, say pussy is nasty and they would never want to please their women, constantly talk down on women, are gay with some serious misogyny issues. That's not homophobic, if you don't wanna be viewed as gay maybe show love to women and actually date them instead of talking about them online.
@@Lxqvs you can always tell who is a male in these comments them men in that twitter thread were literally talking about physically harming women even un aliveing them and men tryna minimize it because they not the ones at risk of it
I AGREE DEE. I hate people being coddled. You can condemn the bs guys but wom3n also act DUMB AF and ignore CLEAR issues. You can hold BOTH people accountable for 1) not protecting OTHERS from harm and 2) not protecting THEMSELVES from harm. We are responsible for caring about others around us as well as caring about OURSELVES. If you drop the ball with either of those things, I’m pulling you tf up about it and holding you accountable. I’m not coddling you when you lack such vital responsibility- especially towards yourself. We’re not children.
@@malagreene8383 not coddling means ignorance in the context, in recent years, people just think its trendy to ignore and argue against people that find themselves in positions of "victimhood".
@@mirza2975 and still. If you’re going to advise or hold accountable someone the best method of communication is not to be ruthless. In the end, they’re response should be something like “you’re right” instead of defensive arguments because of you berating them
No literally lol. Cuz constantly blaming men is starting to get old🤦🏾♀️the reality of it is men will show us who they are we just gotta believe them and do something about it! Women need to start holding themselves accountable.
I agree 1000% men are so simple you will know he's toxic within a 3-6 mnth time frame.....a man being perfect for yrs and then "all of a sudden" his true side comes out is bs you chose to stay for whatever reason
These guys are sadistic, but also this is usually the fate of pick-me women. So part of me don’t feel that bad for them. When you’re so male-centered and desperate for a man you don’t vet him properly because you need a man on your arms that bad and you’re more into him than vice versa this will be her fate unfortunately. The ones that brag the most about their man; this usually their man behind their back LOL.
@@remsghis Men can be bisexual you know. And a lot of men claim to be "straight" in person, but are also secretly DL. So I'm sure he knows how some of those men "operate" in straight relationships they obviously don't wanna be in.
They kind of hate straight people a lot if you haven't noticed. Any place in which they can "comment" on negatively about them is free real state for them.
He's a man, who has been with men, who has close relationships with straight women. He's more qualified then straight men online who have never touched a woman in their life.
I really like dee's takes because while acknowledging how people can be evil she also highlights we all have self agency. At some point you need to wake up up and realise either you accept what's happening to you regardless of how bad, it only takes you to realise thats not what you want or deserve.
I don't even pay attention to nothing what these people be saying. Everyone swear up&down they're sociologists, psychologists, and anthropologists all wrapped in one 😅
When the conversation of "you chose him" comes up, i only feel like its valid if the woman/man has seen and acknowledged the person that their partner has become and has decided that, that is what they should stick with because they feel as if they can't do or get better.
Im anti-social. i dont hate anybody, but i dislike most people . I dont get offended about generalizing because it doesn't resonate with me i mind my business and focus on me im not even trying to date until i move out of the country. Probably asia i love korean, Chinese, and filipino culture japan is cool too but the language takes the longest to learn.
@17:35 Yesss!! My brother whom is a blue collar worker (relevant but irrelevant) tells me the shi- his coworkers say about their wives is crazy! I just laugh cause the stories seem so unbelievable but it be true smh
I’m here for the comment section of dusties mad and not taking accountability. It doesn’t apply to them THEY SAY but they’re still up in arms all red-faced. 😂😂😂
It’s funny cause my mom did this to my dad, she would start fights on purpose to make him hate her cause she wasn’t happy in the relationship and was cheating
In my experience, women tend to read into things too much and then don’t want to talk about it, then build resentment, and blow up at weird times. Men also are sensitive but they tend to just brush it off in the name of being emotionally hard. I’ve experienced this when it comes to friendships. Relationships is an entirely different beast.
Also the joke part is not mundane i taught a domestic violence class. Men who make their partners the joke is a sign of hidden aggression. Sis I know ur trying to be balance. I love ur channel for it. Please look deeper into it. Like one dude who was on a gamw show. He made a joke about his wife. Years later hes now arrested for her death.
Just bc you taught a class on DV does not make your opinion right. Men or even women who joke about their spouse. Is not a sign of hidden aggression. A sign of hidden aggressive is when a spouse says something slick and they know is an insecurity. Even then, that doesn’t mean they are going to start physical or mental abuse. This is how misinformation gets out smh
@@airmann4673 your trying to debunk a person who’s actually studied and did research on the topic at hand just to turn around and state your opinion (because you gave nothing that backs your claim up) is an interesting choice. Seems like you just wanna argue
@@majayyyyy7882 unless you were there, you don’t know what she did. Behavioral health with domestic violence relationships training does not teach people that jokes are a sign of DV. It seems you are looking for an argument. But hay you got it bro
I get that it can be irritating coming from some people who obviously don’t know what they’re talking about, but, quantifying certain habits and/or events is necessary to emphasize certain issues, especially when it’s backed up by multiple studies. And when it comes to statistics, we can’t pick and choose when we want to believe them just because. There’s no point in discussing if we can’t admit certain facts.
But how can you quantify anything when you have such limited experience? Even using scientific statistics is majorly flawed and their studies are limited. Therefore, being one insignificant person in this massive world, pretending like you know what "most" people are doing is laughable
@@testme226 that’s why you’re not relying on one study but several. If several studies come to the same conclusion then it’s worth considering. How are we supposed to have these conversations if we don’t even have a base to start from?
@@testme226 also, what I personally find laughable is that everyone uses those studies and statistics without realizing it. You just got used to those studies and internalized them as facts. If I say that most people eat meat, you wouldn’t question it. But we didn’t come up with the stats for it out of thin air. Studies were conducted.
Girl that's not even what's being discussed though. The people in this video and the people dee are referring to are people who are NOT using studies when they're speaking. The woman in this video said "most men hate their wives", I'm sure she hasn't found a study to back this up. The problem is some people use blanket statements based on their own personal experience because that's what they're used to seeing. THAT'S what's being discussed here, not everyone refers to statistics that they researched let's be so ffr 😭
Also, I’ve noticed how guys view me as “cold” because I don’t want to be all up on them, so they start liking me more and want to be all up on me more. Usually, the wom3n take on that role of being clingy af. But as a womxn myself who has experienced my fair share of clingy guys or guys who just don’t give me space - that shit is annoying. I do grow resentment towards being around them and have to cut them off because it’s too much. Might be my attachment style, idk, but if anyone is constantly around another - or they constantly want to be, then they WILL get annoying. Thats a fact. That doesn’t justify how these guys are too much of a coward to just end it though. Grow some b@lls.
@@nobody1336 It’s psychologically proven that people grow to like those more who they’re not around as much. And when they have to chase after them. That’s why a lot of you experience people begging you for a chance and then as soon as y’all give them everything, they detach or ghost and go chase after someone else. Never heard of “absence makes the heart grow fonder”? Know what you’re talking about before you talk 💀 And I’m insufferable because I prefer to focus on my own life and not prioritise them more than myself and what I’ve got going on? Someone feels hit 😂 find a life of your own, don’t drop everything for someone as if they’re your vitality and lifeline (aka be a grown adult), and you’ll be alright lmaoo.
@@nayatarot777 not insufferable bcuz you wanna focus on your own life just insufferable bcuz why even be with someone to begin with if you’re gonna get tired of being with them.
There was a vid of a husband and wife an her feet was hurting because of her heels or something. So her husband gave her his shoes to wear an he walked barefoot an the guy who reacted went ona whole hate rant about woman lmao. Like bro callllmmmm down. Most men would've just carried her, you'd be mad at that too? Who hurt yall lmao
all of the collective amount of people in the world that dont like the other gender are on social media I swear to god. Meanwhile, i know what grass feels like 😂
Thank you for sharing this insight I looked it into and personally and from what I’ve seen yes men stay with women they hate but here’s been my reasons 1. We have kids together 2. She fkd up one too many times and I stayed when I should have left 3. Being too weak to walk away when we know she’s no good 4. Having to fix her fk ups that affect everyone around her 5. Her being inconsiderate of the effects of her actions and you giving her the benefit of the doubt 6. Thinking she loves you like you love her when you realize she doesn’t you grow spiteful 7. Her wanting to make it work after so much sht she’s done between ya 8. Owning property together being stuck 9. Her having a bad attitude
You gotta remember not everybody was raised the same. It has less to do as being in a relationship and more to do with the individual. There are people that really only thrive in suface level relationships because they havent got healing from childbood trauma. The people that dont remember their gfs birthdays or resent their gfs dont really know a healthy way of breaking up or it wasnt something their fanily put an importance on growing up.
@@NiEalterest exactly. Women around me gossip. Men around me gossip (often times even more with 10x more disrespect than anyone else, ngl). The narrative that’s pushed about primarily women being gossipers come from men who want to hide their own behaviour that they’d be ashamed about if it was to be exposed. Simple.
Dee Shanell I agree with you how can y’all say most men like y’all met most men this is coming from a man I love women yes sometimes they can be hard to live with but so can men reverse it women can say the same about us to me a woman is a blessing I love them who are we to judge each other
I agree that the "most" and "all" terms also annoy me. As far as the topic though, I will say that I've seen some men always joking about their wives, whether she's there or not. I never found it weird until I got older and started seeing that it was an occurring theme on the TV shows, "All in The Family", "Everybody Loves Raymond", and so forth. It was just a thing they did. Does that make it right? Of course not. Also, I do think that some men do end up marrying for convenience, but that could be said for women too. At the end of the day, treat people right and if they don't do the same to you...move on.
this is true but it's not surprising everyone is blaming the women for "not realizing" lol.... the options these days are pathetic ion blame them for trying
its common for ppl to generalize, saying that the auntie lady is "insignificant" for doing so is weird. And half of the video is u saying the same point over and over. We get ur trying to keep ur male audience sis 😭
A lot of men’s issues come from their mothers or women they’ve dealt with not other men the way I see women has a a lot to do with the way I see my mother
The thing is some women sideline the "good guy" that shows he actually cares about you, jump through hoops for you. only to end up as the 'foodie guy' or friendzoned or used. then go after the guy that isn't into to you. If you're this applies to you, then you get zero sympathy. you chose aesthetics over practicality.
I hate this opinion. It's not about good vs bad. Please understand being a good person is not a selling point, thats a basic human standard that shouldn't be the main reason to be with someone. Your baseline should ne automatically "good person". Now the real reasons some people get attached to not good people at the start of a relationship is because of factors that actually matter like sexual attraction which is super important and common interests also extremely important. So these are the real reasons... at the end of day people expect you to be good, that's not a rare standard. The only thing people are looking for at the start is attraction and interest. I feel people so disingenuous, I met lots of guys and girls that label themselves as "good" but they are either super unattractive (very overweight, or no style whatsover), or they are extremely dull to be around. This is my advice, try to focus on two things. How a person presents themselves in the dating world and how you present yourself in the dating world.
@@bunnyrabi LOL I know you are so full of shit. Being "good" doesn't have anything to do with being dull. What? Are they evil then? 💀. Also, there is no such a thing as a "bare minimum" or "basic standards." Women like you are just trying to find a way to piss off the men you don't like (sexual attraction basically) by saying that stuff.
I feel like there is a major difference between genuinely being a decent guy to a woman and helping her out when you can purely out of the goodness of your heart and her just constantly fucking you over time and time again and being nice to her because you want something from her weither that be a romantic relationship or sex and her not being interested in either of those things w you.
Women do not owe you sex or a relationship because you're "a good guy". You are not a good guy if you complain about women choosing other men over you. Some women genuinely want a friendship I don't understand why y'all can't understand that. Majority of the time, women choose less attractive men because they're actually good partners with a cool personality, while men will choose women with zero personality because they're attractive. I don't see men dating 300 lb women because they're "good people" the way women do. This is giving major incel vibes and it's embarrassing.
@@bunnyrabi before I respond to this comment , let me pose this question to you. Do you think it’s easier to be good or bad ? And what is criteria to be considered good or bad ?
Alot of people do. Most people do. Alot of people don't. Most people don't. I like Dee Shanell. She understands Most or Alot of Men. Most or alot of Women are clueless.
Don’t really get the stance regarding less definitive words like “often” or “many.” “All” is obviously all encompassing and should be left out of serious conversations because you don’t know “all.” Grouping terms like “men” and “women” are fine within context. As with “most,” these terms are reflective of people’s experiences, lived and gathered. Generalizations are not your enemy. They are still valid but you need to pay attention to other things in the conversation to gauge whether the person using these terms in conjunction with unstudied claims actually believes that for the entire earthly population. “Many” and “often” are not as definitive tbh. They don’t mean “most people” or “most times.” They’re very loose in interpretation because you’re not really comparing them to anything. You could say many vs few but where is that line drawn? For me, many may be 4, for you, it may be 2. For someone else, 7. You could say often vs infrequently, but you still have the same problem. These are too relative/subjective to get irritated over imo.
You did a whole lot of yapping. The point is NO ONE knows what "most people" are doing and how they feel, so it's ignorant to speak this way. People have limited experiences and foolishly think that this is an accurate representation of the entire population. That's preposterous.
@@kikialeaki1850 lame way to distract from the blatant truth in my comment. It can't be argued lmao it's a literal fact that we have no way of knowing how "most" people operate or think. Using these terms are just a way for insecure people like yourself to attempt to make themselves appear smarter than they actually are. Go cope
I don’t hate my girlfriend, but at the same time I sometimes feel stunted because it’s like I only want to grow and she doesn’t. Like she can’t cook, doesn’t work, and is out of shape (and has been this way for the two years I’ve known her despite her pleading that she’ll do better on all these things). while I’m making more money and getting in better shape, and she says she’ll start doing these things but she never does. And now I’m getting approached by girls who seem to have their stuff together like me, but it’s not like I can tell her: “Hey, if you don’t step your game up, I’m out of here.” Without her throwing a tantrum about me saying that and wanting that to be the topic of every conversation we have for the next month without her actually doing anything to improve. Low and behold, as an adult, I now understand why guys use cheating as way to end or improve relationships 🤦♂️
I think that is something you should and need to talk to her about and if there are no changes you shouldn’t settle for less. It hurts to think about but settling for less will only do more damage to you
And the reason I don’t want to leave: she’s showed me a kind of loyalty and love I’ve never got with anyone else and helped me through difficult times with my family emotionally. Other than these things I really view her as my soul mate. I think imma try therapy 😂
@@god-mage-ki7006If you love her enough you’d let her go you can’t help those who don’t want to help themselves relationships are about sacrificing one thing to make your significant other happy I was once fat she told she loved me for who I was but would also not like to see me struggling with my daily life because of my weight I took it upon my self to exercise and eat right for them now I’m fit I can move and I’m planning to propose she has to be willing to change and if she doesn’t then you have to love her enough to let her go
Just rip the band-aid off and break up with her already. Block her number and on social media so you won't see her begging you to come back. Do not drag things out because it often makes the issue worse. I don't know your entire situation and I won't pretend to but it sounds like to me that you're stringing this girl along because of guilt. If you already mentally checked out of the relationship and are looking at other girls than do yourself and her a favor and just quickly break up with her. I'm not trying to be rude or anything just giving advice, because the last thing anyone should be doing is resorting to cheating or sympathize with anyone who cheats because they want their partner to end the relationship for them.
First of all buddy at the beginning of the video don’t know shit and is the wrong one to try to explain the situation. Hating your girlfriend is an exaggeration of the truth. It’s more like finding her annoying. Most of the time the more a woman likes you the more she wants to be around you. And the more you are around a person the more they start to get annoying. This can go for either gender. That’s why personal space is important in relationships. But a lot of women don’t understand the concept of personal space and feel that you wanting personal space is the same as you losing interest in them. So they try to force you to be around them all the damn time and it’s annoying.
I really hate the concept of "bare minimums." It is just so stupid. Most women don't even agree or pursue them to begin with. So how is it a bare minimum then? Also, isn't it funny how women who clearly hate men jump to a "you are gay, then!" stance? Very sad that many women do that...
If you worship men and think everything that women say is wrong, if you don't even like being near your girlfriend, that's usually a sign that you're gay. This is coming from a bi person and Dee is also bi don't even try to pull the homophobic card lmao.
See I’m offended 😅 the most or all is killing me cause I’m not like that I love my gf I actually like my gf and we started off as friends everytime she leave I’m ready for her to come back 😂😂❤, when I’m at work I’ll I think about is getting off and trynna see her 😂😂, people need to stop because of your experiences don’t mean all of us are like that , one time I yelled and someone was so sure I’m abusive because I yelled meanwhile I’ve never hit or been violent to any partner ❤ mind yall business 😅
I'm so tired of this men are this, men are that like can somebody tell when the next spaship takin off i hate it here maybe it's better on Pluto let's see
Sometimes I feel as through people also have different humor 😂😂 people ask me do I like shopping with my girl hell nawl and me and her both laugh cause she knows I’m literally joking 🙃 ❤ and it’s because she likes a lot of shit don’t mean I hate or don’t like her 😭
the funny thing about women is that they think men cares or values the same things as them in a relationship! 🤣 my father don't know any of his kids birthdays🤣 when we all came out of him and you expect him to remember my moms?? these are just social media women who care of all this nonsense tho
