The Secret Ingredient to Feeling Good in your Body | Marla Mervis-Hartmann | TEDxSalinas 

Your beautiful and I know your probley don't believe it but it's true ❤

thank you for sharing that... I appreciate your honesty. I believe that negative body image affects every size, shape, and age. We are all in this together. Light to you!!!

I think this comment is so important. Body image struggles, body dysmorphia, eating disorders, etc., can and do affect everyone. However, we can't ignore how extremely fatphobic our world is. It's a lot harder to accept your body when the outside world marginalizes you because of the way it looks. We learn that we're bodies first, and humans second. You are not just the way your body looks, in fact, that should be the least important part. It takes time and patience and a whole lot of love, and then more time, and some more love and patience (lol), but it IS possible to rewire our brains and the way we see ourselves and completely shift our priorities. Sure, believing that our bodies are beautiful can be important, but if we're not there yet, it's even more important to see the beauty in ourselves that does not lie in our outside appearance, and nurture ourselves from the inside out. This is all a heck of a lot easier said than done but sending love and strength to you!

I relate. I am overweight and it's hard for me to internalize the message

@@lailaalbernaz206 Wow! Thank you for sharing. I couldn't agree with you more.I am continuing to learn and grow and express my message of self-love in different ways.

I really hope you feel better about yourself one day. Bodies issues can be hard.

Oh goodness! I am hearing more and more men reaching out for support. I don't think many men are open to sharing their discomfort. I work with men. And it is the same issue as women... feeling like their body needs to be different in order to have the life they want. Their is always a deeper issue underneath the body image pain. Healing this makes lasting change. Big hug to you

Your picture is handsome to me, and your honesty on your feelings is refreshing.

I’m so sorry you went through that. It’s never a pleasant feeling getting bad views of your body and no one is afraid to say so. But we are all beautiful including you!! I know I haven’t met men/ boys who go through this but of course I know they do too. Stay strong hun your on the right path to excepting who you are which is beauty🥰♥️😊

i have always like shorter guys;-)

Sending love. You’ve got this 💛

Your beautiful don't dought yourself

I love your commitment. Stay in the positivity. It isn't always easy but it is possible.

Saavycupcake you are so welcome. Is your relationship with your body better now?

I know this is late but you are lovely.

Thank you! So good to see you here Doug!

Thank you for sharing that my journey has touched you.

So true, we need to learn to love ourselves at all sizes, health isn't always depicted in a small body!

You are right, Sara. Weight loss does not guarantee sanity with food and confidence. For me, it brought more pain and suffering. I can relate to your story. Thanks for sharing.

Thank you Josef. I love what you said, "acceptance is key."

you very brave! we all deserve to be happy and comfortable in our bodies to be able to enjoy life!

yes the scale can bring a lot of overwhelm. I turn my back at the doctor's office too. It brings peace to not know.

Thank you Steeve. I am glad to hear that you are vocal about comparing ourselves. It's important that more people are sharing the truth.

Your feelings are valid. And finding the right person to talk to about them is crucial. I get it---Not everyone wants to hear that I struggled because my body size was fine. But it doesn't mean that I didn't hurt myself and feel awful. It isn't about size. It is about the internal judgment. I wish you well. thanks for sharing.

right?? so painful to have found these diary entries.

haha good way of putting it

lol facts

Jay Seifert thank you for your kind words

I am glad that this is helpful to you. It is vulnerable to share my story but feels important if I can help others.

@@MarlaMervisHartmann I could tell from your talk that everything you said was deeply felt and understood. And when you shared the picture where you were hyper critical of yourself, my jaw dropped because it showed how you were not seeing yourself clearly and that is so relatable - we all do that. This is one of those talks I feel I can come back to again and again and it will always be true. Thanks again ❤

@@tdh6003 I was pretty sick. Thank you for your words!!

So did I, and there's nothing wrong with that! In fact, it shows we acknowledge that this is something we need to improve about ourselves. That doesn't mean that there aren't other aspects of our life that we're good at though! For example, I may struggle with what I see in the mirror, but I am a very supportive sister and daughter. It's okay if you struggle feeling good in your own skin, as long as you are working on it!

Glad you found this Nancy. Feel free to reach out.

Thank you for watching. And for sharing.

Im 18 and have struggled for years and today was very difficult, im surrounded at school by beautiful girls who don't eat and are pretty ill, its the same case in a lot of other British private schools. we need to change this, I cannot wait to grow stronger and teach my children such beautifully positive self talk.

Thank you Esme.

@@esmebird9176 Yes, teaching children that there is another way to be with our bodies and food is important to make lasting shifts in our society. We can dob this by feeling confidant and being good role models. thank you for responding.

Aw thanks!

I agree. Feeling like our bodies are a safe home is worth the journey.

hey) as someone who has suffered from depression and bulemia and in general from an unhealthy relationship with my body and myself, i know how easy it is to find pretexts and excuses to hate ourselves. these two things that you mention - fat and skinny- have something in common - they are about what you LOOK like. maybe try focusing on what you can teach your body to do, first. Pick a thing, a simple thing, like be able to touch the floor with your hands without bending your knees and work to achieve that goal, or run a mile or two and ENJOY it (the enjoyment is part of the goal) and mark your progress as you work towards this goal. You see, our bodies are made to function "good" not to look good, and when we work towards function, we thrive from inside out. Try to work not towards looking thin or skinny or fit, but towards being strong, and healthy, and flexible and fast. The satisfaction you will get, especially with strength, is incredible, and it will transfer to your psychological and emotional self as well.. i hope you find my words helpful in any way. best of luck. you are not alone))

I will fix you with my Love :)

so inspiring. thank you

@@MissMeowy amazing

It is quite a journey to be happy. Keep going and hopefully, you will find happiness more days.

thank you for watching.

Isn't this the truth.

Amen!!!! It takes time to unwind society's views and tap into self.

you are so welcome. Are you struggling with your body, too?

@@MarlaMervisHartmann sadly yes:

thank you for watching and sharing!! Please share with others that this may help.

agree!

agreed

thank you Bello for watching and your feedback

thanks for sharing your experience and that you need to find another way to support yourself. Love and light to your journey.

I couldn't agree with you more. The scale is not my friend.

thanks for watching

Good point. I think health is good when we are doing out of care and love, but not out of hatred. Would you agree?

Are you still searching for tips? I do hope you find the perfect medicine to help you feel good about yourself. Blessings on your journey.

good for you!!!! Have you always been like this?

it's okay. compassion with self is most important

LOL

🤣🤣

Tamta Nachkebia , I agree with you a hundred. In fact I think I've said the same as you on other TED talks. I wish they were just themselves

Can we have pleasure with reiki

Yet here you are seeking out this type of video. how you doing?

Im sorry u feel this way ❤️

And no one cares if you suffer. Why are you here.

hazel brown because what she went through is extremely personal and painful (I’ve had an eating disorder for 3 years and am recovered) talking about it is a struggle because you can be afraid of what others say also men sometimes aren’t as expressive because there not shown from a young age that they can be emotional and venerable

Well some men do that too, so no need to mention about the gender right?

I will check that book out. I have read snippets but not the whole thing. Thank you for commenting. I appreciate it.