Hey i just stumbled upon this and I think you are really brave for talking about this bc your not alone in dealing with it. I'm glad your seeking help. Id also recumbent the book "the brain mechanic" i found that cognitive behavioral therapy is helping me and im applying it to my problems. I hope that it helps :)
Glad to hear you made that appointment. I hope it goes well and one result is we will hear more from you. Perhaps you can get creative with those dishes and then treat yourself to some fine food.