The Time a Spy Visited Me Because of P*tin. 

John, that is crzy!

You did way better than I could have under those circumstances! My anxiety or my mouth would have gotten the best of me. Good on you, Dad from Indianapolis! ❤

I had a similar experience after it was discovered I once met with a “common acquaintance” of P*tin and Tr*mp.

What a terrifying experience!!

Yeah - cuz if it were "their guys" you would prob. not have survived the scotch.

I mean...I would like to be a threat to Fascists, conservatives, transphobes, trump (oh wait...all of those are basically the same thing)

Balanced, as all things should be. 😂

I think I need this in shirt form~

I would buy that shirt😉

i wish to be both an asset and a threat in equal and extreme measure

So scary.

I love that this shows that he wanted John to KNOW that he's a spy?? 😂

The only scarier line than that would be to follow with “… and neither will you.”

yeah cuz john blew his cover

that is definitely the moment in the scene where the music changes and we cut to John as his face changes from one of easy hospitality to grave realization.

Yeah, those proceeds derived from the activities of a fishing boat would definitely have some financial implications.

It seems more like an archeologist thing to me than a fishing thing lol

Is this how we finally get fishing boat proceeds?!?!

Or an heavy metal band

But thats WHY it would be a perfect name. Boats are always doing weird law bending things.

Bingo!

I mean, if you don't want to be confused with a spy then don't use such an extremely obvious fake title.

Thats exactly why I cracked up! 😂

I assumed it was more "Hrrmm - maybe I need a less suspicious sounding job title..."

Some littlefinger, varys kind of moment 💀

Most intelligence officers are not covert at all, nor do they require it for their jobs.

@@TealJosh Certainly not so much when operating in their own territory, at least.

I infact work for YPS a dog food company. Speaking of food how about that agriculture ey? GMO? 😂 More like Gee What’s your MO? “Cheers” 🥂 I walked in the door 5 minutes ago but i arrived in your room 5 hours ago

Or maybe he intended to be obvious about it all along because the silence alone already kind of gaslighted john into doubting he asked if he was a spy and backtracked by asking asking him what he does as if he could've got it wrong😋

John: I dunno, maybe except the Mongols

@@gary25566WE ARE THE EXCEPTION

"It got... Putiny. Aahh! Putin!" - John Green

why yes, i called putin a cardboard box of rotten tomato paste, half sealed in scotch tape by a 5 year old with cerebral palsey just this morning. yes, sir i am aware of how specific that was.

Honestly don't quite get the story, I thought it was a Russian spy, than by the end of the story I thought it was a guy from CIA? Would American call their own... secret agent a "spy"?

So... Scotch. 😉

right, when he was like, "so, after i realized this guy was a spy, I drank a lot of the thing he's brought with him"... I was like, "oh, OHHHH, ok, ya done"... hindsight though... I feel like I'd probably call my local FBI field office (or... CAN you just call the CIA?) and preempt the whole situation, b/c if they weren't yet, our government's almost certainly watching now too... oh, and if i had any connections with, idk, a mass spectrometer? I'd see if there was anything special in that bottle.

Exactly what I was thinking lol

Yep, my thought exactly.

Aren’t they one and the same? 😜

"How much is your mortgage?" Me: None of your damn business. How much is *your* mortgage? Why don't you call your banker friends and ask them that question? "Why would Russia want to hack your email specifically?" Me: How the f*** should I know? I don't even know that they *did* hack my email specifically. Probably just general hackery.

Little did you know, he was there specifically to get your hyper-specific perspective on certain colors.

Oh cool! What's the hex code?

Ok but as someone whose favorite color is a specific shade of yellow-orange I would unironically love to know more about the shade you love!

@@rmdodsonbills They're just way more friendly than you think

I mean honestly, if we can spend a million dollars of our tax money on delicious scotch and figure out what the the hell is going on in the world and whether it is a threat or not, that will be money well spent.

He never seemed coercive. Proceeds to coerce the financial, personal, and political life of John Greene out of him.

There was an WW2 interrogator who was nice to everyone and couldn’t get one person to crack to remained friends with him. Someone else can add in the details

Truth serum

in vino veritas

It probably wasn't an American diplomat. John doesn't mention the guy being from Russia, so I am thinking he was from one of our European allies, or at the very least, was pretending to be from one of our European allies. It is common for these guys to sniff out your loyalties ahead of time, and to present a false flag. For example, Russia has infiltrated American institutions numerous times by pretending they were Israelis or even from the South African apartheid government. Foreign countries that are not always on the best of terms with the American government, but that have a lot of fanboys among certain groups of Americans who may be ideologically oppposed to working with the Russians/Soviets.

I mean, their answer is going to be "no"

@@antonliakhovitch8306the phrasing, though, is important. They should go with, “why? You haven’t been accused of any crimes.” That would make the person feel nervous that calling a lawyer would somehow make them seem suspicious, whether or not they have anything to conceal.

​@@johnjones_1501 brother not everything is a conspiracy

​@@kiiturii If you think that's a conspiracy wait till you learn what a real conspiracy is.

"mostly" is the intriguing part to me

Even better, maybe there would be a note because the dialogue seems too perfect to be realistic.

“He looks at me… and I look at him… and he looks at MEE…. and I LooK at HIIIM” (on loop meme)

​@@crimsonjennifer When an intelligence officer works under "official cover" - such as with the state department, they do actually have to know/do a decent amount about their formal job title, for plausibility. All available records would show someone like this "works for" (on paper) who they say they work for (paychecks, etc)

@@crimsonjennifer Possible that he occasionally attends meetings about Regional Trade or whatever.

😂😂😂😂😂😂😂

That's perfect for the FBI though. Nobody suspects the boring one.

@@shellh929 "We at the FBI do not have a sense of humor we're aware of."

I've had to do this before, too, and the only thing I knew about the subject of the interview was that he likes to play D&D. The interviewer was like, "Okay... what else?" Nope. That's it. All I have is D&D.

The FBI likes boring.

Must be nice to have a dad who is interested in talking to you. If I called my dad, he'd answer the phone saying "WHAT IS IT?"

@@aluisiousyour dad would pick up? Nice.

I don't think my alcoholic abusive dad would be inclined to pick up and/or care, nor would I care to tell him that lie. So no, not always, though I do aim to be a MVP Dad myself one day. 😄

@@jeremyapacheMore people have abusive dads than you think. Them picking up is NOT A flex

@@RobinSteinerHope you’re careful; people’s parents always pass on negative traits onto them, which it’s disgusting..

If that's not a normal sentance and you find that 'poetically beautiful' then you must have low-standards.

​@@Adventeuan sneering at people for finding things beautiful just to tout yourself as someone with "higher standards" doesn't make you sound cool or interesting, it makes you sound like a rude 14-year-old. i agree that it is a poetic and well-written sentence, as a lot of his sentences are

@@asterling4 I am not attempting to sound "cool" or "intresting" as i care little for what others that i will never know have to say. A patchwork of dirt is not deserving of the title of 'Art'. Poetry is a form of art.

@@Adventeuan dude... listen to yourself. you're insulting people on the internet for calling a sentence beautiful 😭

"well yes but yes"

Weirdly, I've also met a spy, and they were like "nooo..... me?" You'd think they'd be better at covering at LEAST that part.

Dude immediately made a note to come up with a better cover next time. Or to do better when speaking with an Author who likely has done far too much research into this sort of thing.

You’re looking good, John. Refreshed.😊🤗

"You'd be surprised how often people say that to me..."

to be fair, it sounds like the person was not working for Russia but working probably for the US or one of the US's allies.

@@JoshuaCasey Best guess is he’s CIA.

I dunno, I would have called someone? Like maybe the FBI?

@@JoshuaCasey Probably one of the US's allies. Most western countries have laws against spying on their on people, so they have their allies do it and "Share the intelligence" with them.

@@JoshuaCasey Spies are notoriously good at tricking you that they're someone else, though. who knows who the heck it was lmao (edit: I do think they were from the US, I didn't see john's comment about the ID, also *why* would russia do this lmao) (I will leave this comment because I think it's funny though)

But inside he was thinking "thank goodness, I can dispense with the awkward segue I had planned".

@@milesgould8288 Unless his plan all along was to come up with that obviously fake job title so it would lead John to the truth.

There may have also been a bit of shock that an average untrained American would see through his cover. America does not have the best track record when it comes to HUMINT and an abysmal track record in counterintelligence.

Either that or it was him saying "duh"

I like to think that spies and governments in those places think they're being so sly but it's just that their population and usual victims know better to just play along, and act genuinely befuddled when we can see through a name like Hugh Mann and a made-up job title no corrupt bureaucrat would ever write for being too on the nose.

Lover of peace, hope, and Jennifer

Legit lol. Well done.

I would watch a two hour film of this interview. No actor playing John though, just John getting drunk, answering questions from memory. Sweating.

Could probably make a movie of all the mildly crazy stories he's told.

Truly a man of his profession.

I wanna know what was in that scotch

@@Hobbychemiefreak Probably alcohol.

I want to know what this guy said or did to make John feel that way. This story's so wild! 😂

I mean it probably was a good idea.

Honestly, I don't find this funny one bit. This is scary. Scary that the intelligence community would even attempt this operation, scary that John felt compelled to answer questions that could easily be answered via other means, couldn't possibly be answered by anyone who would actually do so, and/or are none of their damn business. Also, drinking while being interrogated is a terrible idea.

​@@rmdodsonbillsThe events themselves are scary, but the video is absolutely hilarious because of John's comedic delivery and phrasing. I was laughing throughout the video. Something can be both serious but also humourously dealt with at the same time.

@@rmdodsonbills Seriously this is a very regular day at the office. Not James Bond. This.

@@rmdodsonbills Came here to say this. His delivery might have been comedic, but this seemed more like "I'm laughing but I feel like crying" type of delivery. It was eerie the whole time.

Cars vs covid is still my #1

Truth serum

You'd think the crash corse guy would be smarter than to tell a spy everything! Lmao

Description really sounds like there was some kind of truth serum in that scotch

He might be compromised.

@@squee222 Nah, the friend didn't even want to. "He just had a way of making [ them ] feel that it was a great idea to [ introduce him to John ]. He wasn't coercive, he wasn't impolite. He just made [ them ] feel that [ the introduction ] was inevitable."

Fr

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+++ how many pluses do i have to add for Hank and John to see this

+++++++++++++++

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That's nice to hear! I hope it was just because my books are popular! -John

@@vlogbrothers Maybe the hackers were looking for an unpublished manuscript of yours or your brother's.

@@vlogbrothers I wonder if it's the love of the book through Russian society plus being critical in crash course and on vlogbrothers with the Crimea explainer. WILD.

Another good reason with Georgia should be part of EU.

Am I missing something? TFioS was written *long* after the Soviet Union collapsed

Is this the parisian dentist who was arrested for a murder in a country he'd never been to because his finger prints were supposedly a 100% match for the prime suspect? or am I mixing up different real life absurdities?

I think the one who opined that John suffered from both an outer pain and an inner pain before fixing John's toothache. Now that I think about it, is a toothache an outer pain or an inner pain? ​@Taolan8472

@Taolan8472 No, I'm not fully caught up on the lore, but from memory: He was doing press for either Paper Towns or The Fault in Our Stars movie. While he was doing it, he somehow chipped a tooth and mentioned he was experiencing a lot of dental pain to the tour managers. Anyway, he shows up at the dentist's office, and apparently, the waiting room had an original Monet-basically, it was absurdly fancy. Then, the dentist enters the office on a motorcycle, wearing a helmet, with long, flowing hair, and fills in John's tooth.

Agreed.

however that person was being truthful, we assume, on who they were and why they wanted information.

That sounds like a cool job. Explosive whatever, not the kiosk

@@saltiestsirenIt’s the guys in the hot and heavy AF suit that diffuses bombs and IEDs. Not sure fun is how I’d describe most of it personally. More like nerve racking.

​@@saltiestsirenI believe that's the job where you blow up unused ordinance and depending on mission, IEDs (or non-improvised explosives such as mines).

@@MrMontanaNightseh. I do the opposite of their jobs. I build bombs. I’ve worked with EOD a lot. And they’re all pretty nonchalant about it. So are pretty much all of my ordnance buddies. Either it works, and every thing explodes how you want it. Or it doesn’t. And then it’s not your problem anymore 🤷🏻

Nah they just needed to clean up after a mess they saw.

I know. I'm still worried about that. Did the spy have a thick russian accent and keep referring to Russia as Motherland?

@@FreelanceTranslatorTipsRussian agents are generally better trained than that, and often recruited from the EU or USA.

I think he wanted to make me uncomfortable. And it worked. -John

The intimidation of implying he was a spy clearly worked though. I'd assume that was on purpose.

@@vlogbrothers he probably wanted you to know you're right, but was forbidden from actually telling you

@@vlogbrothers I find that really upsetting to be honest. You were the victim of a crime. Why not just contact you and attempt a normal interview? If they went as far as buying fancy scotch and sending an asset to meet with you then they had almost certainly learned most of what they needed to know through their own means already.

@@morningstarkid07I mean, to be fair to the spy, he did contact John and conduct an interview!

Exactly, it was eerie but you can't do anything but laugh at how crazy it is.

Don't talk to them until you talk to a lawyer. Seriously.

​@@_maxgrayhe has a family to protect and he's got nothing to hide, probably for the best he didn't want to seem like a threat to the russian government

@@bruhcoin2361 "I've got nothing to hide" is how a lot of people have gotten themselves into trouble talking to law enforcement. *Cops* won't talk to law enforcement without a lawyer, which should tell you something. Constitutional protections are for the innocent as well as the guilty.

Apparently they've been DMing on Instagram!

Yep, John even responded on Twitter saying it was the best day of his life lol

clandestine operators are actually taught this. if you are caught off guard, or cannot think of a response, simply control your expression and stay silent. you want to maintain the momentum you've already set for this encounter/interaction. you want to 'stay in control' of the conversation.

If I thought I was talking to a spy, I'd have a million questions for them. They would just quietly get up and leave, eventually, because I would not focus on answering their questions at all. Lol

I am a salty btch and I hate being treated like an idi0t so I'd go "okay, i am not talking to you OR drinking anything unless you tell me the truth, otherwise bye". which is why if spies wanted info outta me they wouldn't use this strategy. they have dossiers on these sort of things.

I would assume they already know... and are just checking the "narrative"

Yeah and you would be denied a lawyer anyway 😅

Police get the "not without a warrant/my lawyer" treatment. Agents from my own government get my best attempt at not utterly panicking and trying to be helpful and maybe ending up in helpful ADHD crisis mode or unhelpful ADHD ramble mode. Spies from friendly countries get a little less effort to not panic and to hold back the incoherent ADHD rambles. Spies from unfriendly countries better know how to calm someone down out of a panic attack where I can't speak and then deal with 5 hours of rambles about utter nonsense because I will be too panicked and too stressed to cope at all and be an utter wreck and dissociating but not wanting them to be angry at me. They will definitely learn the birthplace of my cat's maternal great-grandmother, the history of the domestication of corn, exactly which areas of which countries my ancestors came from to the best of my knowledge, everything I ever did wrong in my life, my opinions on the history of the US, 6√2, and why I don't trust the color yellow. What they wouldn't get is anything actually useful.

Throughout the whole video I was thinking "Would I really disclose this information to a stranger? Wouldn't I feel suspicious, weirded out, or at least a bit apprehensive about giving away such personal information to someone I've never met?". But then, in a social context, with the right kind of conversation, and especially if you're not accustomed to thinking about being drilled for information, I imagine it can be easy to be caught off guard and just answer rather than make a fuss.

Honestly this isn't the sort of thing the police do, and it's certainly not the sort of intel that goes into court evidence. It goes into a file and stays there.

This

​@chillsahoy2640 I know that gaining information from body language can be dubious but noticed that John was shaking his head in a " no" when he was mentioning the specific questions he was asked but he also shook his head in a " yes " motion when he said that he told the spy everything. So I take from that that he's talking about a true encounter but not the questions he was asked.

​@@whophdDon't talk to any law enforcement without a lawyer. Really. Truly. Say you don't want to talk to them and that you want to talk to a lawyer first.

exactly this. or imagine if the spy was a russian asset.

I'm pretty sure he doesn't blink as a tribute to zefrank in most of his videos

After 3:30 he does a whole lot.

​@bubblegodanimation4915 do you think he's asking for help in Morse code or something?

John never blinks. Blinking isn't normal.

it's so true to og vlogbrothers form!

+

Also, their awesome dad helps run the business side of things

Honestly think this may be the first vlogbrothers video I immediately rewatched

That sounds like he did bring his work home

I want to take classes with your dad. Sounds like a superpower to me, the worst equipped person to read people and situations I know

So was his coworker or a spy or just trying to test him and see if he would give up info?

​@@branstooka Maybe it was just a classified project he didn't technically have the right to access.

@@theintrepid7583 this was exactly it. The coworker legit needed some help, knew dad was the guy to get the job done, and didn't follow protocol in knowing who was ok to see his project.

I find it hard to believe they'd send a four-star general for that conversation.

@@fustigate314159 Might be one of those stories where an extra star is added each time it is told.

he did say this was several years ago. might have been before he did that?

@@fairydustcryptidBut probably after he asked President Obama to name Alice, right?

@@fairydustcryptid Oh, I'm pretty sure it was! I'm just gently ribbing him because he says he wants to be "just a dad" but ends up taking on world-spanning plagues and writing bestsellers and such.

@@amykathleen2 omg I forgot about that. man this space has existed for so long

Do you remember how long ago it was i wann go rewatch those videos now

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My question is: "was there anything else in that scotch?"

@@Brucimus83 alcohol is already a truth serum, there's no need to add something else

I guess it's the only thing about James Bond that does ring true

And Hank the Beanie Sandferbs?

The target is compromised.

Yesss, I was like wait why do I know this happened?

What was the name and approx length of the livestream in question please?

@@ShadyHitchhiker I think he's actually told this store multiple times in more private forums. I had to check the date of this video because I knew he'd told it before. Maybe even during P4A.

They have definitely discussed this on the podcast too, but not in so many details.

Unless they asked him science questions, in which he would never stop talking /lh /hj

​@@AUnicorn666Probably still not in a terribly straightforward way, though! 😂

@@kashiichan true lol!

Yess. I would also buy that.

THIS

Hell yes!

😂😂 I would buy that. I am such a sweater too 😰🥵

This. 💯

He's also a threat to corporate grifters playing -* roulette with treating tuberculosis. *I skip sticking in the usual term! 🫢

Unfortunately there is a lot of money playing for the opposite and corporate espionage is just as dangerous as governmental.

I was waiting for it.😅

I spent a couple of minutes having to grapple with the fact Vlogbrothers is on its 18th season. It doesn't feel like it's been so long but oh boy it has.

@@chillsahoy2640 it doesn't, but then my back will ache or a joint will pop and suddenly the passage of time feels very present haha

@@pretty.odd. Earlier today I was talking to a work colleague about how we have a rule that all our records need to be archived for 30 years before they're destroyed (in healthcare, in the UK). And they said "Yeah, you're next" which reminded me that if I was a paper form I'd be due to be destroyed this year.

@@chillsahoy2640 "you're next" his hilarious but also such a threat 😭😂

@@pretty.odd. This coworker has a dry sense of humour that I love! And they're around John's age too so they've been here before.

"Mostly harmless"

"just a dad"

Actually, a better title would be "An Asset and a Threat."

Maybe it helped that he didn't present as a gay clown. Reminder: Poopin *hates* being portrayed as a gay clown, specifically. Just thought you should know.

Book rental fees ... for middle/high school?!

@@geeksdo1tbetter elementary, middle, and high.

@@geeksdo1tbetter elementary, middle and high school. Yeap.

​@@stephamillionwtf that's messed up. Direct from the parent? Thank God I teach in a GA Title I school.

@@rethinkOURreality yep. My kids go to title l school and we still have to pay it. There’s waivers for lower income. And if parents don’t pay it, the school districts can hold the child’s diploma at their senior graduation and not give it to them (ours is one of them that will).

**spy headlock**

¿Really? Can you explain? (I'm Canadian)

Wait what?! why??

Really?

It's been a long time since I've seen this but I think I remember right ru-vid.com/video/%D0%B2%D0%B8%D0%B4%D0%B5%D0%BE-Ny8RY4Ou7Mo.htmlsi=stxM4SibaW_J4Wp4

For those who don't know the story, years ago, pre-Vlogbrothers iirc, John once tried to cross the US-Canada border with no cards and little cash on his person. That was (for reasons I don't totally understand) cause for them to deny him entry to Canada, and that denial is still on his record to this day

we don't know if that person knew about it though? for all we know they might have been lied to as well and just been used as a vehicle to get in touch with john

yeah, but THAT friend is not invited to anything any more and blocked from all my social media, for sure...

Honestly, if I were in that situation, I would keep up the appearance of at least acquaintance-level contact with that friend but not a close friend (though carefully controlling what info they see that is private, of course) just in case I have another... incident. And I wouldn't tell them about their friend, just act like nothing particularly weird happened. Better for there to be that avenue of contact still open if there is an issue in the future with certain hackers. I mean probably friend doesn't know anything about this, and just was like "oh yeah my friend _loves_ talking about the Indy 500!" and honestly meant well. Or they knew (maybe work for the government and have just enough clearance to get a vague version of the situation) and didn't have a choice or were convinced it was best for John's own well-being. I mean if they were told "we think the Russians might be after your friend and we need to contact him quietly" it would seem like being a bad friend not to help if you trusted the person saying this. Or the friend works for the agency directly and is in on it all and had to decide if they thought that the risk to John of being investigated was worse than that of not being investigated combined with any risk to national security. If friend knew about the Crash Course stuff, for example, they may have decided John was not a threat to national security and this was the safest way to get confirmation of that and make sure he wasn't compromised in any way. We don't know the friend's situation, but I think limiting info that goes to them is reasonable but keeping in touch is probably the best course of action and maybe "slowly drifting apart" over time so it doesn't seem tied to the visit. Obviously they knew a cover to use and either got that from the friend or from the internet, and if they watched that much of his content they were asking a lot of things they knew the answers to (which is likely also true, want to make sure he is telling the truth).

You have no evidence that the friend lied to him. You have no reason to conclude the friend knew it was a spy.

Just a dad from Indianapolis who is friends with one of the richest people in the world, runs multiple nonprofits and for-profit companies, and can pressure international conglomerates into adjusting their pricing. If I was an intelligence worker sems like a japanese manga/animenameto me

​@@atlas2545what?

@@samable668 That first sentence is just long, and descriptive, enough to be an anime or manga name.