The Toxic World of Hustle Culture, Fake Gurus & Self Help | Asmongold Reacts to James Jani 

I've been watching Asmongold for a while and I think it's working. Any day now I'll turn into a literal God.

The most insidious aspect of "self help" is when workplaces weaponize it. I worked for a large organisation where we were all loaned (not even given) copies of "7 Habits of Highly Effective People", wasted countless meetings doing pop quizzes on it's contents, sent to meditation and had it drummed into us to "choose your attitude". This was essentially a way for the org to treat employees like absolute shit and if anyone challenged it well then they weren't choosing the RIGHT attitude. Oh instead of replacing that Supervisor position, we'll just add another 30 people to the 60 you already supervise in a high risk healthcare environment! What you have burnout? CHOOSE YOUR ATTITUDE. I did eventually and went to work for a much better and healthier org but screw their corporate gaslighting.

I really liked Asmongold's anecdote about him using the wrong saw to cut down a tree out of stubbornness, and his dad using the correct saw to cut it down quickly. That's a real life lesson: learning/teaching by example to get the desired results. No "10 tree-cutting techniques that will make you the next Paul Bunyan", no shaming him for using the wrong tool or ridiculing him for being a fool. Just do it right and with minimum effort, trust your apprentice/student to understand the lesson, and move on.

"There ain’t no money in the cure. The money’s in the medicine." - Chris Rock

“I started working out and scheduling my days” “What a loser!!” - Asmongold 😂

A dude I work with has a wife obsessed with mental health, self help, all this shit. He literally sometimes can't come in because she's having a "crisis" about the kids not putting their shoes on or some shit. He's super depressed because of it, meanwhile she spends hundreds of £ on self help nonsense which just makes her feel worse.

this is so interesting because these self help nonsense products always rubbed me wrong and felt off but I could never really figure out why

Hecato said in his writings, “What progress have I made? I am beginning to be my own friend.” That is progress indeed. Such a person will never be alone, and you may be sure he is a friend of all. - Seneca

For me it was all about taking action. I almost never was into this motivational content and self development though like many others I was trapped in thinking, reflecting, procrastinating etc. What I figured out was that the only thing making me achieve something was putting the effort in. Not planning, dreaming or writing down goals but taking small steps to get whatever I want, changing what I don’t like in myself bit by bit. As a result I ended up being rather skeptical about self care stuff like sessions with psychologist or especially watching/reading motivational content. I understand why some people need this, it’s just that my personal experience made me realize that taking action was always the key to success. What I also can relate to is struggle. I grew up thinking that it was a thing to avoid at all costs, however what it really came out to be is a very valuable experience. Each crisis I came through made me mentally stronger and more mature. What helped me through my toughest time was changing the surroundings and some bad disturbing habits were gone therefore making it easier to focus on what was really important.

"All of these goals that you're setting for youself are all in the context of another person".- Man that just hit me right in the face.

Asmon, love your reaction videos. You react 'Harder' than other streamers and it doesn't feel forced or ungenuine.

This video looks like the origin story of a Marvel Villain. Guy didn't see results, so now he's turning into "Anti Self-Help Man" that's gonna destroy the Self-Help industry, and the whole planet (just because he can) "The Avengers: Curse of Self-Help" out in theaters on April 23rd, 2023

The self help stuff changed my life and got me where I am in my life. Read probably 25-30 books, lost 80 pounds, bought a house and fixed it up, got married, etc. But it's not maintainable.

The only self help I need is two cold ones on a Friday night and I’m good. Ain’t got time to be depressed and shit.

Could this be considered self-help for self-help addicts?

When I was 18 in my first year of college, I went through a self help phase. One day I realized that something was off with the authors that I would read, they were all selling the same product. A pseudo sob story followed by advice and an offer to buy a product / course

This was a really good video, hit home for me... I had a stretch reading these books, and what it did, was make me feel more depressed for not living up to what I thought was the right way to live. I hate mornings, I usually fall asleep at 2am, I procrastinate over literally everything, and I'm not good with anything numbers related (I'm good at math, I just don't like it). Instead of trying to fit in someone else's lifestyle, I created my own. I'm a lot happier, I'm very productive and overall I'm happy. I have bad days still, but when I finally figured out how to work around my weaknesses, my depression slowly disappeared, and eventually I was comfortable just being me.

I was yelling at so many parts of this. So glad at the end he actually said “the power of now” is the book he recommended. That’s the one I was yelling the whole time. Broke my addiction to really toxic out of control negative thinking. That and CBT. More of an explanation of our psychology. Which if you didn’t know, will really change the way you think. I agree with the looking for a father thing but more along the line of looking for anyone to explain some shit but you don’t even know what you need explained. Lol

So the issue isn't the self-help, it's the lack of self-control the individual has and how they get addicted to a feeling of success and learning without doing anything more than reading and watching stuff. Also to a degree, there is the danger that we live in a world where you have to help yourself to get better and there are con artists who are offering tools to help people get better which actually prey on those who don't do the due diligence to make sure their source of self-help is good and legitimate.

Self-help is kinda a weird space now, but I will say the Dale Carnegie book (How to Win Friends and Influence People) is actually pretty valuable for people who have issues with social interactions. That said if you get "addicted" to self help you won't end up solving any problems. That is to all say: There are nuggets of very good information in all of this but you have to keep your own head on your shoulders and don't frame everything as "manipulating" other people.

The outlook on life is actually brilliantly positive!

I think the thing asmon talked about at the end of the vid "Theres always more" is why I enjoy being a software developer. Theres always something new to learn, something to get better at, even though theres a lot of initial frustration with learning new shit it feels so rewarding to finally get something working.

How to Win Friends is more about salesmanship and how to get that sales relationship going. In that context, it's a really good guide.

Asmon got roasted by his own mother by her buying him How to Win Friends and Influence People. ‘Son, it looks like you need some self help’.

How to win friends is the best book I ever read. Got me promotions and relationships. Best take away. Act like a dog when you see someone. How does a dog react? They are happy to just see you. They don't want anything other than your companionship.

most of the times it's not the thing you are addicted what's keeping you from doing other stuff, the addicting part is just a way to cope with the real issue which is preventing you to move on, i'm "addicted" to youtube these days and it's not because i can't stop watching videos but because i'm going through a very tough part of my life and it's a way to literally get through the day for me, it can back fire if you don't know when enough is enough, but sometimes it feels as simple as easing the pain a little in order to get through it and not die in the attempt

I swear a lot people can't believe that some of us are 100% content just existed as is. I feel so much more freedom and contentment by opting out of chasing all the fluff of this world. I have no motivation cause I see most of it down right pointless.

Close teacher bought me a self help book for grad and the beginning sentence was "I dreamt of a dog telling me, your life is going to be ruff ruff ruff" I closed that s*it and started reading overlord instead.

My buddy had a passion for sales from about 20 yrs old to 32 yrs old and he was lucky the market collapsed and he was able to buy a house in an up and coming market and now he's "rerolling" to a lower pay, lower stress, more family time in a support role in his career. He found happiness not in making as much money as possible but to enjoy what you do and do it with purpose. However if he didn't set himself up first he would still be on the sales grind.

16:45 The guy mentioning gender norms isnt disagreeing with Asmon pointing out guys are doing violence. He's stating that one of the reasons guys especially feel so vulnerable at that age is because of these norms. "You have to provide" "You have to become a man" "You need to know what you want in life" All these things are far more heaped upon guys, resulting in psychological pressure to perform (no innuendo)

This shouldn’t be grouped in the same category as “self work”. There’s doing legit self work - like seeing a therapist, reading books to work through your own crap, and pushing through your own hurdles to be a more un-hindered you. I think what this talks about is “self-help” culture. In that you do this stuff without having the intention of growing yourself, but rather just reaching for success goals. Which is fine, but different.

Struggle is not good, it's inevitable. It's an important distinction.

I never follows other people's self help, because it comes from them, not myself. It's not self help if someone else is supplying it.

I am with Asmongold, the concept of requiring a book to live by is alien to me. Everybody I know who got into self help motivation all became insufferable, not unlike religeon. Personally the road to happiness seems like common sense, we all know what and how we can improve our welbeign, the issue is motivation which only we can do

Go inside and see self. Listen to self and witness self . Was hard was painful and am still healing but at least am dealing what I denied

I cannot related. Self help book changed my life. I read a few books and decided to set out a 2 year plan on how I wanted to get my life on track. I set out a weekly cycle where I would complete tasks to improve my earning potential, physical and mental health. I didn't miss a single week in that 2 years. Now my incomes tripled and it literally changed my life.

RU-vid’s poppin off for him, but 42k on a Saturday at noon time, that’s a “whatever this is ain’t workin.”

Holy shit this hit the nail on the head for me. Especially the part about not “indulging” in yourself and instead trying to “make yourself a better person.” I basically just focused on school instead of making friends in college and I regret it. I’ve never bought into or believed in self help because if it actually worked those books wouldn’t need to be written.

How to win friends and influence people is about leadership and sales. We have to read it at the company I work for and most of it is just listen to your employees and have a general interest in them.

These people are all like cults .. way too convinced of their bs and they can just talk circles to you and you’re trying to either get away or get to the point - so you can address their premise but they never actually get to it and then they just ask you when you have time to come to their thing and they make it sound like you can’t say no bc they are so happy to have a friend .. I tell them that all the stuff they are saying I can get is everything I already get from Jesus Christ

That cycle referenced in this video sounds very similar to tutorial hell for new programmers, no actual progress but you feel good and think you are making progress.

I Got Trapped In The Self Help Cycle, Lucky It Was Only For A Year And I Didn't Spend Any Money On Gurus. Now I Just Stay Focus On My Goals, Control What I Can and Accept What I Can't. I Let Loose, Have Fun, Take Breaks, Sleep In Sometimes, An Had Better Success Doing That

Actually bettering yourself means you’re no longer in their target audience. Why would they want that?

Knowledge is priced. Wisdom is shared.

You sir are an absolute inspiration to me.

Well most of that stuff *does* make you better or whatever you consume it for, but you actually have to *do* the stuff they tell you. Thats why Tony Robbins always says "All of what I told you means nothing if you don't do what I told you"

31:00 it's ok to work hard, but you gotta work smart before you work hard, seen lotsa people burn out because they use every ounce of energy to do a job only for me to turn up, figure an easier way to do the job without compromising on the essence of the job and end up twice as productive as a result without tiring myself. 33:20 that's an ideology called positive nihilism, aka why should I torment myself over this, we are all gonna die in the end anyway. The problem with that ideology is that it's still nihilism and you have a likelihood of progressing further into nihilism, at the same time it's important to care about things in order for life to be worth living, so the proper response isn't "we are all going to die anyway so why should I care" but rather "This isn't important enough for it to be a problem"

Man the comment about you being there at the right time… Dude doesn’t realise that big streamers and content created pop up basically daily at this point. The huge ones have just had more time to stay. Not all big CCs will go huge, but in the real grand scheme of it all, bigs more than good enough for plenty of us

20:30 I learned from Asmond that you just gotta say "F em". Makes such a difference!

Asmon - I discovered your channel during the Johnny Depp defamation hearings / I love your energy, authenticity & down to earth attitude. > This video in particular is a splash of cold water to the face 🌊 - 😳….. It’s true. There are a lot of unhappy people out there ( myself included ) who feel lost from time to time & then experience shame on top of that - Like “how did I go so wrong ? “- btw - the music industry also feeds off of human pain & suffering.. € And then this magic book pops up & I feel like - ok, maybe there is a way out of here.. > The thing is, life is full of challenges, pain & loss , untold suffering, etc. etc. > And the truth is - self help is a multi billion dollar industry- But one could also say the same about these born again Christian groups who feed off of scared & lonely people, who force these “ lost sheep “ to be “believers”, & then “ supporters “ & then lifetime members - etc. > I think AsMon has it right- these “ help groups “ prey on people who feel orphaned. - It would be good to see a teaching where the person is encouraged to be self sufficient & self reliant. That would be a sure sign of SELF development. 🐥🤔🥰

I had a coworker who was a huge gamer who bought all the new switch games when the switch came out. BOTW, Smash ultimate, xenoblade, Mario kart, etc. and every time I asked him about it, “oh I haven played it yet.” So is he a huge gamer? I dunno. But he has a lot of games. He just doesn’t game.

“It’s just begging for attention, it’s pathetic” - spoke the steamer

Life is pain, Highness. Anyone who says differently is selling something One of my favorite quotes from Princess Bride

"It's Okay to Not Be Okay" is an amazing Korean drama on Netflix. The female lead actress is ridiculously beautiful.

my belief is that you have to work hard so that when time comes for you to be lucky then you'll competent enough to capitalize on it

Best thing I ever did was the self authoring program because it's just you alone with your thoughts and previous experiences. There is no bullshit "mindset" in the way and no fog. You are almost writing your own self help book that only works for you.

I don't know if you can consider Dr. K as self-help, but watching his videos has certainly changed the way I look at myself. A lot of things that I just didn't understand about the way I think he broke down. This helped me to reduce a lot of the frustrations I had with myself. Less smashing nails with my head and instead use a fucking hammer.

Anti-smoking ads are also self-help videos. Not all self-help is bad. A lot of people come with the misconception that the person that they are talking to doesn't realize "luck" is involved in all that you do. Most rational people realize this. That doesn't change the fact that you still need to put in work to be one of the "lucky" ones who is able to make it.

I think life is more about finding YOUR meaning and not THE meaning. Find small victories, getting dressed without falling over is a good one and will give you a good chuckle.

After watching Asmon's videos on this hustler Tate guy, I went and looked him up in alot of interviews and stuff. Honestly... besides how he treats women, he is pretty based on most of his stances when it comes to the world and how the world really works. When you listen to him it sounds fucked up, but the reality is that we are in a fucked up world these days. So when he says some of these things and they sound so crazy, its sadly just saying it like it is. His best rant is on modern women wanting traditional men, and there is no traditional men to be found anymore.

Best quote, I don’t deal with your feelings, “shut up”.

Burnout is caused by not taking the time to walk away from whatever you are doing and enjoying the downtime and getting rest. You can get burnout from a job you hate, it has nothing to do with how much you enjoy what you are doing.

theres a difference between motivation and inspiration. inspiration is in a moment, motivation is over time.

38:08 "the power of now" from eckart tolle is actually a good book for just having fun by existing with tons of benefits like lucid dreams and emotional control

Imagine going to college and having enough time for all this existential bs. When I was in college it was class, work, study, sleep and repeat. My friends where the other 5 smartest kids in my program and we only met up to study, it was a truly perfect relationship.

A good number of people that call themselves healers and makes posts on how to break from the matrix spreads this form of “self help” too.

Know what the original version of this is? And its been going on for thousands of years. Its called religion.

Most of them leave out the whole truth of to succeed you must fail over and over again.

A Man dies when he no longer accepts challenges, and he doesn't have to die to stop living.

The problem with the generic self hep road to success is that: If you have it you don't need them! And if you don't hey can't help you!

To the "no rich person sleeps 8 hours a day" let me tell you that when you have no money to pay rent or food, you dont sleep 8 hours a day either, this is NOT a fair world were people who sleep less are rewarded or that in general going through struggle = reward. YOU have to find what works for you, what Elon Musk came from a model married a Pilot family he is not YOUR role model, take a deep look inside and recognize yourself and that you dont have the same support others have find what makes you happy and what kind of success fulfils you, fuck the world if it don't fit its standards, if living in a small home with a loving family with a job what lets you have hobbies and enjoy your time outside the job is heaven for you, then pity those fools who need more. find what you want and pursue it your own way.

I too think that working hard is necessary to achieve something, the thing is though: I have no idea what to work on

For a couple of years I was in the self improvement phase. I never bothered reading any of the books though, I just watched youtube videos. At first it was nice that I was learning a new mindset, but then I realized everybody was spouting out the same junk over and over. I never paid for anything because I figured all of the knowledge was already out there. I'm sure some of it has helped people out there, but most of it was bullshit.

Hope is the first step on the road to disappointment.

That book is a good read. For me it taught me how to easily spot when people were trying to manipulate me, helped me spot narsacist and people with severe mental illness that would only cause harm if i let them into my life.

8:23 "while you were partying I was studying the blade👀"

9:30 only makes sense if you understand dopamine's role. It is not the reward chemical it is the motivation chemical. Imagine you are craving cheese once you get the cheese and are enjoying the cheese that is not dopamine, dopamine was the heat seeking missile to the cheese. When under the effects of dopamine you feel motivated not gratified. I never thought about this in terms of motivational speeches and self help, but its exactly right. For more info on dopamine check out Huberman podcast.

This was so boring. Also, wasn't this just another self help video?

I always heard of Asmon, over the years but never really paid him any mind. Finally started watching his react videos... instantly became a fan. And then I found out he lives an hour from me (Fort Hood/Killeen/Nolanville)

10:30 "This is so alien to me" ~Continues to mount/transmog farm~ ~Beats *another* raid~ ~Plays *another* FromSoft game~ ~Honing stream, again~ 😒 its a pursuit for dopamine, and "feeling good". Whether you get it from being a CEO, bungie jumping, over eating, drugs, spending money on streamers... you can abuse anything in order to get that hit of dopamine again

32:40 Asmond really gets it. Do not turn your hobbies into your work.

How to Win Friends is an awesome book. The title is terrible and its not what people think. The audio version is good too.

4:17 Thus us very much like the intro from Trainspotting... "Choose life"

People here that say they had a self help phase must of been doing it wrong or preconceived that that things will change instantly. Cool you watched a ton of videos or read books but if you don’t take action and be consistent with it good behaviors and routines that beats the point. People don’t point out the reason people take cold showers. You know why? Because it naturally helps reduce depression. Why do people have journals and write down things they’re grateful for? When you do that you start to be grateful for anything even the bad. People need to understand why they do certain things. Bunch of negativity, there is no utility in being depressed and hopeless. Be strong and keep moving forward my brothers and sisters.

my god his points here are so good and relatable

I worked at a sales job to help get experience for my career. This was one of those sourced companies that works inside Sams club selling phones and Direct TV. They very much embraced Hussle Culture and we're all about making money and if you couldn't perform your shifts were cut after the first 2 weeks and they financially bled you to make sure you'd quit. I eventually just quit going to work and quit because my wife had a very serious family issue so while I was on break I called her. ON BREAK. My boss the "owner" of this small Solutions company walked over to me and told me to go outside and get off my phone because my actions were unacceptable and giving a bad image to our company. We didn't have nametags or uniforms... I mean we dressed in "casual finery" so we almost looked exactly like customers. Ridiculously he gave me an ultimatum when I ignored his demand after telling him the situation and told me I could either take time off for the next 2 weeks or be fired. My friend that got me the job now is very brainwashed by this guy's teachings man. I quit during these 2 weeks of "free time" and just picked up a job somewhere else the "owner" said I didn't have time or skill to make money and left because of my inability to make sells and commit to a serious job environment. 💀😂 These guys absolutely tanked in Covid and I had the pleasure of letting the guy know I'm still doing well and my family is thriving now all because left.

"It's ok to not be ok". That's basically the main idea behind Buddhism. Nothing is permanent, whether it's good or bad. But we get addicted to, and only want to feel happy. That's just not possible. You will have good and bad days, and Buddhism teaches you to be OK with not feeling great. Because the root of all suffering, is desire. Think about that. When you desire to feel good, when you don't, you make it so much harder on yourself, and you give the bad feeling even more power over you. You have to just accept whatever is. This is the thing I took and kept from my "self help" journey. Concepts from Buddhism like this. If you are just ok with whatever you get, and whatever you have, however you feel, you'll see that it's never permanent. Eventually, you'll feel better. You'll be happier. But don't get hooked on being happy either, because then you fall right back into the vicious cycle.

"To *meeee* this is just, like, so alien." Yup.

27:05 the complexity is log, not exp. So the less amount you go the more impressive it is. 1cent -> 1$ is more impressive than 1mil -> 100mil. "I didn't invent it. It is what it is"

How does self-help feel good? How come I always feel like I'm dying inside and miserable whenever I do anything routinely productive.

In the words of the great Denzil Washington "just because you are doing alot more, doesn't mean you're getting alot more done"

I'm 38, depression most my life. Best thing to do is join EMS and then you don't have to worry about your life cause you have to save other people.

21 and 22 Jump Street are both superb.

I agree with the topic of this video, but it's way too dramatic and offers zero evidence (basically like an old Shane Dawson conspiracy video). Self help is toxic, but you're not going to convince people who have been brainwashed by testimonials with your own testimonial. And then he literally contradicts his whole video at the end by plugging self help books...

Nothiing is more dangerous than the blind optimism

It’s a great book. Self development is great. Hustle culture is unhealthy though.

I think a lot of people are looking for the answers to the question of why are they so lazy, and when they encounter these ideas, they recognize the value of them, but never put anything into practice or have the resolve to push forward and enact change. Very few people have the willpower to truly change.

Yeah young guys are addicted to this stuff. Learning a skill specifically isn’t very glamorous. But learning Jordan Peterson or Joe Rogan stuff is fun and makes you feel manly. Studying for your medical degree is boring. More fun to imagine you’re a social media millionaire.

I read those books and they helped me in the context of acheiving certain outcomes in a job or dealing with strangers. The lessons in the book can be mis construed to be maniplulating people. But in the right mentality and where ever you are in life, the lessons were very helpful

Thanks for the video, listening to what you had to say on the topic really helped me come closer to forming an opinion too!