Yes! Not just for a marriage but many things! @magdalena, it truly does and breaks one down but here's where I find peace; I have presented my request or petition to Him, now it's up to Him even though I feel I need what I am requesting or petitioning for in my now!!!! He knows my needs more than I do, He's called for me to cast my cares, so I literally cast my cares and try to stay sane and absorbed in worship seeing other things He has done that I might have asked before or not!
Yes and yes! God lead me into missions when all of my peers were settling down and starting families. I think comparison has been the biggest hurdle for me- not comparing my life to others. It's okay if my journey looks TOTALLY different than most of my peers, and vice versa
For healing from mental and physical health, and to meet someone and get married. I'm only 29 but it scares me seeing everyone else live their lives while I'm just waiting to be better / have someone to share it with. I love your use of the word 'companion' as that's exactly it!
I am 72 years old and still single. God has never pointed out to me why, but one day in my early 50s I knew that it would never happen and accepted that. The freedom I have as a single Christian has given me hundreds of blessings in other ways. As a worship leader since 1988, I’ve had the freedom and blessing to lead others in worship, and write worship songs that have been successful, with nothing getting in the way of either of those desires or obligations. I’m sure when I get to heaven Jesus will tell me why, and for now I am content. I consider myself blessed to serve where God has sent me without hinderance. Amen!
@@paigehughes7557it's not always God who separate us unto him. Sometimes we missed it. Even if you've never been married, it's ok. Most people in marriage want out and vice versa. Just be happy and make the best of your life.
YOU WOMEN MAKE EACH OTHER PROBLEMS WORSE ,I can't believe the advice im reading it's not too fxcking late for you ma'am lower your standards that's where the biggest problem is for you WOMEN looking for a Disney fairy tale in a the real world If this is you standards wise 6ft ,6figures ,6inches u might as well say its done for u .look outside your surroundings and count how many men meet any of the visible examples I just gave
Im 58 latino male no family due to abandonment since birth ..being alone has really lead me to look to God for the love i need ..the lover of my soul 🕊
Mi hermano gods timing is worth the wait I’m 57 and single aswell if our awesome god sends me someone then wonderful and if he doesn’t I’m ok with that too it’s his plan. Bendiciones 🙏
It really becoming very difficult to connect with people that believe in God, it refreshing reading all this comments about trusting God, we can connect if you don’t mind
I love this. I was a singles pastor for many years in a huge ministry and I’d tell the singles that we live in a broken world and being single and desiring marriage is healthy and biblical, just like wanting a good marriage is biblical. But in this broken world we don’t always see the ideal happen and God may be just as heartbroken over the single wanting marriage as he is over married people wanting divorce.
I was like this in my early 30s and got married at 35. It was so HARD being single but I had so much time to spend with God and doing his will and travel and do what I wanted. Got married and hardly have much time for any of that anymore. My relationship with God is less robust as it used to be as a single and the kids TAKE OVER your life to the point you feel like you have no life anymore and it's all about them. So I would say please enjoy being single and taking care of yourself. Marriage and kids is literally self sacrifice. The benefit is you aren't lonely but you desperately want to be alone sometimes. It's two different extremes. I wish it weren't so extreme.
I completely understand this. I am single now after a long marriage and my relationship with the Lord is so much closer than when I was married. I'm loving this closeness with Jesus! I have never felt so close to Him! I am so happy with this time right now. Thank you for sharing your story. 😊❤️
Wow thank you for telling your testimony and opening your heart ❤ I wish every person in their 30's could read this comment ❤❤🙏 That's the reason I'm trying to enjoy this season. God has been revealing to me his will to young single people. He doesn't want us to feel lonely our unloved. He wants us to be grateful for this gift and use it for his kingdom. ❤❤❤
Thank you for this truth and reslity check. Though, I do believe and hope for marriage anf children, I do admit, I enjoy my alone time with the Lord and hadn't seriously absorbed the idea of losing that...or reducing that. Hmm
Thank you for your raw honesty and talk about wrestling with God and getting to a place of peace. I am 48, never married and no children, so this honest conversation was a blessing. I am contending with God on His promise as He has promised me marriage. I also think someone in my mid 20’s might have been the one but his own fear and insecurity kept him single and he’s now in his 60’s. I just met a kind man a few weeks ago and he’s 54 and never married with no children. We’ve gone out twice and he’s asked to meet up again, so this might be the season where my 30+ years of praying comes to fruition. 💝
@@philominadangana5071 verse to those who think and see human life on earth as daily mating/dating: 1 Corinthians Chapter 7 32 But I would have you without carefulness. He that is unmarried careth for the things that belong to the Lord, how he may please the Lord: 33 But he that is married careth for the things that are of the world, how he may please his wife. 34 There is difference also between a wife and a virgin. The unmarried woman careth for the things of the Lord, that she may be holy both in body and in spirit: but she that is married careth for the things of the world, how she may please her husband. 35 And this I speak for your own profit; not that I may cast a snare upon you, but for that which is comely, and that ye may attend upon the Lord without distraction. Souls, remember: GHOSTS = DEMONS. you and your loved ones ain´t demons. You and your loved ones are ADAM = mankind, created in the image of GOD. you and your loved ones stay not around to "ghost", we return back to dust and back to GOD. Genesis 5:2 Male and female created he them; and blessed them, and called their name Adam, in the day when they were created. Ecclesiastes 12:7 Then shall the dust return to the earth as it was: and the spirit shall return unto God who gave it.
I m turning 40 this year ,and I m always desiring to be a wonderful wife and any amazing mother. But my question is that is there a man who have never been married before like me and no children like me?😂😂😂
satan the god of the worldly system has programmed society. We don't live in the worldly system and we walk in TOTAL BLESSINGS as we OBEY The LORD being led by HIS PEACE. The LORD wills that we be in a PERSONAL RelationshIp with Him where HE alone is Our Teacher and Father - Matthew 23:8-10, John 17. There ARE TWO things The LORD GOD spoke to me about - first, that I should NOT TOUCH anything roman catholic which is rooted in pagan sun god worship and is in ALL christianity. You should seek The LORD on how to be in total OBEDIENCE to Him. Second, HE told me that the RIGHT THING will happen at The RIGHT TIME. So I am never anxious.
Sometimes there isn't perfect timing. It's simply just not going to happen, and it's best to just mourn, grieve and work through the pain to reach a place of contentment.
Imagine being married but feeling the most lonely and rejected, even more so than when single. Marriage isnt the answer to all your needs. Create a wonderful single life for yourself! Maybe God has someone for you in the years ahead but if not, thank Him for all the saddness and despair in a possible marriage He's saved you from.
Indeed marriage isn’t the answer to all of our needs; however, may those who desire marriage have the opportunity to experience it and may it be a blessing to them. Nothing wrong with desiring marriage and not wanting to be single anymore. Hope people lonely in marriage find a way to cope with it or better, may God intervene in their marriage.
May God grant you the desires of your heart. I'm 44 and have never been married or in a serious relationship. I've always wanted to be a husband and father.
Right there with you, both. 46, have prayed for my future husband since I was 15, and then later added prayers for future children. Never married (and never imagined not being married at my age), but carrying the promise I have from the Lord regarding that. May each of us seeking marriage come to know contentment as the bride of Christ, comfort in our grief, and fulfillment of promises made by our faithful God regarding kingdom marriages (and parenting).
Me too, 46 , never married , no children & hoped deeply for it for years. Shocked it didn’t happen. I hope for a Christian husband now. I am truly enjoying building my relationship with the lord during this time now though & becoming a true Christian, Follower of Christ & reading the Word daily. I don’t feel this time is wasted now & that does feel good. Grateful for God’s love & taking loneliness away or much less. Thankful I came into comments & see so many also sharing. I don’t feel like it was only me. Thank you everyone. Excellent video. Very grateful for it. 🙏🏼🌈🩷✝️
This was so helpful Rita. I’m a woman who follows God and lives for him, 57 now and have not dated in over 20 years. I realized by listening that I live with others judgement of there must be something wrong with me and have been carrying some baggage about my own singleness. I’ll bring Jesus into therapy with Holy Spirit and hash it out. ❤
This was so helpful to me in my time of testing as still being single while all my peers are now having/raising great families. I didn't think of being single like have just heard from the video but if this is God's will for me then be it. I will still serve and glorify God in my singleness. I am a clay & God is the Potter. I am all the work of his hands to fulfill his purpose here on earth as it is in heaven. Glory to God.
If you are lonely and don't want to be single, the first step is ...dating. and no, Jesus is not on the apps. LOL. If you are cool, then its no biggie.
I was stepping into my 30's and went through what I call a mid-life crisis. All the expectations that I, culture and even the church put on me for marriage, having a family and other parts of life that "are suppose" to happen in your 20's all came together at once and I was flooded with disappointment. Thank you for mentioning grief. Mourning was such a vital part of walking through disappointment of something I hoped for and deeply desired.
Thank you for this, I’m reliving this pain again after a failed relationship at 35. I contended for it and it still failed. This has been the hardest loss.
Yes, I turned 30 in 2020 in the midst of the pandemic and severe lockdowns. I would say I almost had a midlife crisis as well. Such a difficult time of my life. The grief of what you thought would happen by certain times of your life. Very painful to surrender the timing to the Lord.
Same, glad we can share how rough 30 was. God got me through it and now at 33 I keep telling myself, life is on earth ~120 years, and there is no marriage in heaven so either way, it’ll be good, i just got to trust Him ❤
THANK YOU for being here - this was totally a spirit led find. I've been praying for a true God loving, Spirit filled single woman who can speak to being single. I cried out to God as so many well-meaning friends have suggested books, reading, and podcasts from Christian authors regarding how to deal with my singleness. Every.Single.One is married.....I was like "GOD, ARE THERE NO SINGLE WOMEN CHRISTIAN LEADERS WHO CAN SPEAK TRUTH INTO MY SEASON!" This message was a direct answer to my prayer. Thank you for speaking truth into my season. 🙌❤🙏
God’s been pushing me to write a book about what I’ve learned in my singleness while I’m single and I feel like this comment just confirms why there’s a need for that. It’s so hard to receive encouragement about being single from someone who is married & often it’s written as a preparation guide for marriage.
Exactly - I'll be praying over your words and that the Lord fill you with courage and speak to the hearts of many who are coming to peace with the calling of singleness. That God be enough and fill us with contentment and love for others. I will be watching for your book's release! @@alittleoflolo ❤🙏
Thank you Lord!!! Finally someone who truly understands how I feel. I'm 46 and this is EXACTLY it. I don't understand and God and I argue/talk to Him a lot about this. I also know a lot of incredibly beautiful, strong, wonderful, funny Christian women and they too, are single. I don't get it either but you're not the only one. This is me too. And I have said ALLLLLLLLLL the very things you have! I'm with you. But I still hurt and am still confused. I finally had why I believed was a real word from God about a certain man. 6 years I obeyed God and I did what I thought was what He wanted me to do...and the man left and doesn't even miss me. Never loved me anyway. And all I can think is...I'm heartbroken....and God knew all along..I just don't understand. Tough stuff. thank you for this video 💜
Not much older than you. But know your experience, and this is what i have learned. Gods has a really good sense of humour. He leads us in paths of righteousness and affords us time to just be in his presence. This would not be possible being in a marriage. So as much asvwe long for an earthly connection.....
first time i've heard someone say....'i have big faith for others, but not so much for myself' and on a sarcastic run to keep myself real....YES, YES, - same for me....that's exactly me. Thanks for saying it.
53 here and never been married not even close....I have watched ALL of my friends and family get married including my nephews....so I get what youre saying...
I didnt get married till i was 43. It was all God's timing. I had pretty much givin up. I didnt think God would being me a man that could stand my weirdness. 😂 But boy was i wrong! God brough me one of the most beautiful souls he ever made. And i thank God everyday!!! ❤🙏
As someone who just recently got married at 29, I’ve felt a lot this in my singleness and waiting for the man God had for me, and still have the aftertaste of it so to speak, and the journey to get here was definitely hard but also so beautiful. Thank you for speaking to this hardship that so many people (I agree, especially women) face in the body of Christ.
Congrats on your marriage 😊 🙏🏻. This discussion speaks volumes to me cuz I relate so very much. 41 single never married no kids. It’s been a real struggle. I think we all came across her channel for a reason.
Really appreciate this video! Just turned 45 and grew up in the “I Kissed Dating Goodbye” era. I never learned how to date and thought it would just happen…because it hasn’t I sometimes wonder what’s wrong with me and did I miss my moment? Thank you for reminding me to listen to the Good Shepherd’s voice.
I am a few years older and received the same teaching big time and disagreed with that approach. Like everything, we need to practice and learn from life experiences, but as Christians we can have better guidelines than what the world has to offer. Why is relationship any different? Even now I still counsel and encourage my Christian single friends to date and practice how to be in a relationship. They learned A LOT about the opposite sex and themselves, and they make good, mature, Christian choices. Not sure if that book was inspired and written to mislead and destroy...... you know what happened to the author of that book.
I went to a conference in Seattle Washington years ago and you were there. I was a young worship leader and loved the way the Lord spoke through you. You told a story about going out for a meal and ordering two cokes one for you and one for Jesus. I’ve been human alone for 30 years now and every once in a while I will feel lonely and at those times I always remember what you said and the Lord ministers to me there. 😊♥️
that's pretty cool :) what's your name btw? also hope you do have spiritual family that can come alongside you and hold space for these thoughts/topics!! but if not I can drop an email haha. i turn 25 if that helps
I’m single and 42. I feel that college and the world led me astray from my hopes of meeting a Godly man. I started working on my walk with God again in 2019 and now I am mourning a bit because Godly men seem to all be married already. I am so thankful God brought me back but it’s hard to see all of the couples at church. But I know I am there to grow closer to God and not to compare myself to others.
I got married in my late 40s and pregnant years after my last period. Nothing is impossible with God! Truly! 🔥🙏 You are 100% right that the key was and still is intimate relationship with the Lord
@@evaweber5267 it is worth the wait. I love my husband but God comes first and the decades of being on my own established that truth deeply in me. In what is to come we need that. These next few years are about to get tough for everyone. We need to be rooted on the rock 🔥 By the way I felt the same about all the good Christian men being married already. I met a man walking my dog (he was walking his dog too) and I led him to the Lord through lots of chats. He’s now on fire for the Lord! So don’t give up. ❤️
Don't look at marriage as something you must accomplish in life. If it happens, great. If not, no sweat. For the most part, people who are in marriage want out and vice versa. Just be happy with your life and make the best of it.
I think many people look at it as a desire and not necessarily a accomplishment. I think the if ot happens it happens attitude sounds great but as you read the comments many are heartbroken and seeking the Lord to ease their pain. And thank God we can bring Him those things. I always find it interesting that people don’t tell those that desire children these types of statements. ❤🙏🏾
@@_heyimbritt the issue is we can't force anything to happen if it hasn't happened. My experience and what I've seen tell me God does prepare marriages for his children early - usually in their twenties. If people are still waiting in their 40's, 50's, and even 60's, rather than raising their fists and getting angry at God, they should ask themselves have they missed it because they resisted the idea of marriage or anyone for any reason. My 40+ years of walking with Christ taught me God is never wrong. We're wrong. If we seek God, he will let us know.
I am single now at 69 years due to someone else's choice a year ago. I am grieving the loss still and asking God what He wants for me in this season ahead. My prayer is that I find Him to be enough for now. I love what you said about the Body earlier. I am lonely but as He said in the Psalm 68:6 God sets the lonely in families, he leads out the prisoners with singing....... And I am grateful
I am a LMFT. I have shared this with several Christian clients. Thank you for your powerful message! I know several ppl, including myself who have benefited from your wisdom. Thank you!
I’m just a compassionate observer, I’m not single. I just wanted to respectfully poke my head in and say…I’ve counseled a lot of married people who wished they were single…. But, why doesn’t someone start an on line group for single Christians. If 10-15 of you were interested…I think it would be so meaningful. I sincerely hope you don’t let this opportunity slip by!
I just came across your youtube channel and have really enjoyed them. I remember meeting you through Homes with Hope where I was working with Trisha, and you were helping with fundraisers to get our fostercare business up and running. I feel so blessed to have found you here on RU-vid. I was single for a really long time after my first marriage. That marriage was only to get me out of the house at 20 away from an emotional abusive mother. and absent fateher who worked all the time. Even though my family went to church; God was not taught at home. I was single for 25 years after that short marriage before I met my current husband. I had no children and married him when I was 48. We are still together. I have single friends who have no children now and are struggling with this same issue. I can't wait to pass this along. This message of unanswered prayer speaks to all of us. I love your honestly and vulnerable to speak the truth. God Bless you and keep these coming! BTW: i loved your sermon on disappointments!
Thank you for sharing this! Next month I'll be 60 and have lived up until now as single. I too once thought I'd be married to the woman God had for me... but it never happened. At this point, I'm comfortable with being single and not looking for a mate. As great as marriage is, there are blessings in singleness too. Honestly, for many years I don't even focus on or think of myself as single. It's just me and where the Lord has me. My focus has to be on my walk with the Lord and service to Him. Thanks for encouraging us with this message!
I was so happy when you said at the end of the video that you adopted a child! Sis, you did the right thing. If a man comes, fine. If not, go all the way to heaven as a mom and the bride of Christ. Wow!! You adopted a baby!!! That's it. That's all.
@@mvg516525,000 children age out of foster care in the U.S. every year. This woman did a noble thing. If you’re so concerned about it why don’t you father a foster child.
Thank you so much for this! 34years old. Have never been in a relationship... still believing and trusting. And I so resonated with you in everything you said. I became a foster mom (having faith for adoption) at the age of 29 😊 He is 5 years old now and the biggest blessing in my life. I have gotten so many negative remarks about my relationship status. One person actually said - 'you better hope that he accepts your child.' But that is just a world view and not a God one. I believe with my whole heart that if God chose this path for me, He chose a husband for me that will instantly have a fatherly bond with my son and love him as his own. But I am also praying for peace that if I never meet him, that I will be content in Jesus. Thank you for being so raw and honest ❤
Thank you for this. I prayed immediately after this to ask speak into my disbelief, for so long I've believed for others but felt hesitant to belive for myself. My prayer in this season is to pray that my singleness will not feel like a burden, but a reflection of his protection and faithfulness. ❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤
Wow, this is profound! Never have I ever heard someone so accurately put into words the sentiment of my own heart. As a 48 year old never married woman life is so very isolating. You may not understand God’s perfect timing but I know for certain part of the reason is so you can share these words with other hurting, longing souls. Thank you for being so candid and vulnerable!
Thanks for your open and honest message on singleness. I turned 60 last September and have never been married. I got a word back in my 20s but last year I really felt an awakening to find my “spirit” mate. Started dating a man last October, still waiting for God’s direction in our relationship. Maybe he’s the one or he’s helping me to be open when God brings my spirit mate. Like you I do not let singleness hold me back from living a full life.
I'm turning 47 this week. Single, never married, no kids. Not gonna lie, I have trouble trusting God in the area of relationships because if it hasn't happened by now it's hard to believe it ever will, even if it's a desire of my heart.
Your honesty was so refreshing - thank you! I've heard too many times the trope "Jesus is all you need, and if you are not content in Him you are not spiritual enough." While I think God should be 1st in our lives, it's true that He made us for relationships (of all kinds not just romantic), and the ache of longing is a very real part of our humanity. I appreciate the ways you've allowed yourself to be real about the pain and longing for something that has not come to pass. It's also so cool that you adopted, I think that's such a beautiful way to build a family. I'm in my late 30s and am indeed open to adoption too, but deep down, I feel it would be best (for me) to do that with a husband for numerous reasons. However, it's hard to find a man who is committed to his faith, and has similar values and interests as mine. I thought I heard God say "yes" when I asked Him years ago if He wanted me to be a wife and mother, and I'm still really perplexed as to why it hasn't happed. And I have also done my part to be available (open to set-ups, involved in things where I could meet someone, tried online, etc...) It's really hard.
Had SO many prophetic words about marriage from my younger years so now I’m in my 60s and still single. It was tough. I decided to ask God to be my joy and fulfilment and let His will be mine! 🙏🌈💝
You are a very good person…I’m overweight myself….I was single from 38-48 I didn’t date anyone..then God told me to get ready cause he was bringing my husband…I needed to give him what I I know men love I lost 40 lbs I learned to become humble and submissive I’m married now one year and it’s a struggle because I have to make sure I am serving him every day and not to be selfish…just sharing my experience the Bible says the beauty of a woman is humility…
Gosh!! I absolutely love your vulnerable voice in this area (and the sarcasm!!). So grateful for women like you who have gone ahead and remained with the Lord in this journey and use it to strengthen others. It is definitely not an easy road and one where there is a continual laying down of the promises God has spoken to me. But the beauty has been when the moments of "I don't understand" come and tears are flowing, He is there and speaks a word to give me the encouragement to press on. A submission to His was, the result, I am kept by His power. And walking with a community of single ladies as well as married has provided opportunities to carry each other when a wave comes.
Wow. Thank you for sharing. You have no idea how many people feel and think this same way. I'm 47 years old, no kids and single. I pray daily, fast, pay tithes and journal and it's like GOD where are you? Why haven't my prayers been answered for a husband or to have children. I don't understand it. All of the people in the bible that received healing and miracles, got them instantly. There was no timing. People in the bible didn't have to wait weeks, months and years for their healing or their miracle. I'm still believing that GOD will answer my prayers.
Your discussion of “laying it down” in your Holy Spirit session, was the Holy Spirit ministering to me today. I actually live in a “valley” and was tearfully contemplating stepping out of divine timing this afternoon. Giving up. The process you illustrated was vivid for me “going back to the valley and digging it out of the ditch!” I’d be coming right back here today. Thank you for perfect words, helping me see. Thank you Lord ❤️
I just loved this. I got married for the first time at 51. I went through the loneliness and tears and anger, but always in the back of my mind and heart (God’s grace!) was the knowledge and gratefulness I had a wonderful life despite my singleness. I am grateful for my marriage and it’s brought such depth to my life! However, like someone else posted, I would rather be single than in a bad marriage. Single loneliness is so tough, but loneliness in a marriage, in my opinion is even worse. I connected with so much of what you said! May the Lord continue to bless you with truth and wisdom!
Hi Rita, thank you everything that you have shared. I'm in my mid 30s and have seen many Christian friends get married. I've struggled over the years to be genuinely happy for them to be honest... I'm a work in progress. I've been on the sarcastic self awareness program for a long time. I've been using "God's timing" as a crutch for many years as somehow it helps me to get back up and carry on with life. I too have never received a promise from God so I'm not sure what His plans are for me. I've become so independent and have seen relationships around me and it's set the bar so high, I've seen more of what I don't want than what I want that I will never settle for less. I have times where being with someone LOOKS pretty but when I think of my space, my independence my mind gets changed very quickly haha. I feel like I can't pray for something when I'm changing my tune every other day. I also feel guilty sometimes of saying "I don't need a man, I can do this on my own" so often that I think I've been reaping what I've sown :( this was a thought that came to mind recently. I have a 30th birthday party coming up - couples galore - and at first I didn't wanna go. Loneliness can be very isolating but I'm pushing myself to go. Meet new people and who knows. I definitely wanna try the therapy session and hear what Jesus has to say. I will say this this, I am happy hanging out with me and I have made peace with not getting married and having kids because I know God has some sort of plan for my life, I'm trusting in that. I've enjoyed living a pure life. Trying to live righteously has been an experience. You've given me some gold nuggets to do some self reflecting so thank you for being a woman of God who gets REAL. Xx
So good Rita! Thank you for being so real, honest and encouraging. I have fond memories of your worship at the Anaheim Vineyard in the 90s; how Worth it All helped me sing through the pain of being single then. And is still gracing me in the same way when I feel alone today. You’re a gift to us single women and to His Bride!
Really needed to hear this 🌱 I’m a 28 year old man and it’s only been 5 years for me, never been in a serious relationship. so I can’t even relate to many of you in the comments. But Just brings peace to know your not the only one going through singleness and loneliness… especially when you still have baggage to deal with, while wanting to be with someone. I wish it was easier to understand I struggle to hear that so many are single
i appreciate this comment haha. i turn 25 and while i desire a spouse, by God's grace and strength i've been content just w the Lord for some years now. it's quite the journey to get to that place tho! haha. i have so much to work on personally, so it's not my time to get 'out there'. glad you found your way to this video brother!! this podcast episode is such a gift.
Thank you God for leading me to this lovely lady 🤍 Thank you dear sister Rita for encouragement and sharing your story. Oh Godly men, where art thou? End of 30's, have a son, am preparing for menopause, time flies for all of us! Guarding our hearts became really crucial..
I appreciate your voice on this topic! It is refreshing to hear someone how understands the struggle and doesn’t push it away by spiritual jargon or singleness is a gift language. I felt encouraged by the words you spoke!
You are so incredibly inspiring and strong in the Lord. Thank you so much for talking about this 🙏🕊❤ I'll turn 30 soon and only recently I started enjoying my singleness and layed it all down. The Lord warned me not to choose anyone that He didn't choose for me and He gave dreams of my future Kingdom spouse. I'm willing to wait for decades for it to come to pass if this is God's perfect timing. There is no other option for me.
I’m almost 50 and have always been unwillingly single. I’m heartbroken from unrequited love and am unable to accept my life as it is. There is no fulfillment or peace. My life has been only failure , isolation and trauma. I’ve tried to hold on to faith but my circumstances are unbearable and have been barely hanging on for year after miserable year. No friends, no energy, nothing going for me. I’ve tried so hard but feel I don’t measure up mentally or physically. I’m in agony- there’s no growth happening. So exhausted 🖤
You need to go to a church that loves the Holy Spirit and ask them to lay hands on you and pray for you to have those things broken off of you. I am someone very well acquainted with sorrow and and grief as well and I know how those things can hold you down. Jesus was also a man of sorrow and grief and he doesn't want you to live day after day being exhausted and downtrodden. Please consider talking to someone in your church about this and having them pray over you. And make sure you're putting on the full armor of God to fight against those attacks. Also, make sure you're having therapy with the Holy Spirit and hashing things out with God everyday about everything that hurts you and asking for his guidance. God Will never let you down.
@beautyforashes So sorry to hear what your going through. I’ve been there too. I agree you need a support group, counsellor, mentor or prayer partner. Don’t do life on your own, get help. Some of life’s seasons can be really tough, so don’t be afraid to ask for help. God calls us to share one another’s burdens. That’s why finding a good church is vital. You will come through this, wiser, stronger, more resilient, and able to help others in the same way you’ve been helped. God uses all our struggles. You are so loved by our Heavenly Father ❤
@@codfishcathie1873 I have a question. How do you go about finding a good Church? I haven't been to Church in about 5 years. I used to go with my Mom until she got sick and eventually passed away. But from what I remember, everyone there just stayed in their own little groups and everyone made a mad dash to the doors once service was over
I'm a Christian single female in my 60's and was actually reflecting on this just now in my quiet time with the Lord. Questions such as 'what happened!'🤔 was raised. I've been truly blessed in other areas of my life, though, for which I'm sincerely grateful. This video truly resonates.... Thank you for sharing it. Your video was very timely! I've now subscribed to your channel and looking forward to watching your videos past, present and in the future. 🙏🏾
God healed me of my Crohn’s and I’d had surgeries and everything. I pray that you press in for healing and receive it. Once I learned that hereditary diseases are hereditary curses I grasped truth. I broke those curses and was healed completely of Crohn’s and depression. 🙏 no joke. I wouldn’t mess with you about this. Once healed I got married. Nothing at all is impossible to God. 🔥🙏
Rita, *this! I've been listening to your music since like 2003 off and on. This resonated with me sooo much! I have my people too, and it's very different when all your girlfriends are getting married and you're pushing 40 and you've not been on a date. Definitely different and can be difficult, especially when you've wanted to be a wife & mom and have a godly family. This was real and raw and I loved it! I'm listening again. I'm not sure if I've ever received that as a promise, but it's been a longing & desire when I see all the cute lil babies and my heart just...💔. I never did the wedding planning stuff though. But THANK YOU for all of this! Yes! Someone who gets it!
Thank you for sharing this. I’m not single but have struggled with the whys of God’s ways and the unfulfilled desires of my heart. And in the not knowing there is a beautiful fellowship with other believers as we give up our ‘right’ to understand and work out that trust in a Faithful Father.
Incredible conversation Rita, thank you!!! I have a daughter ♥️ and have been single for 13 years and I soooo miss having a complete family. But my trust is in Jesus to complete our family. It’s in His timing ✨✨✨
Wow, what blessing this post was. Reading the comments makes me know that we all trust God because He said He would withhold no good thing, but at the same time, we could all use a hug 😌🙏🏽 be blessed ❤️
Rita this is fire. I am 55 and in the dating world again. God did such an amazing work in me through hurts and losses in the past year. Now experiencing the dating field I continue to say that I can’t walk into someone else’s prison and chains that God through Christ freed me from after 54 years, but that seems to be what I find. Every way I seek God, and seek His holiness in my life, I diminish choices by the day. I have no promise of marriage again, but i do have the hope and promise that God can and will sustain. I have had to relinquish control so that I can see that happen and find out just how good and close He can be♥️ I want a second chance to see if I can live out an integrous and respectful marriage, but only He knows. Thank you for rawness and honesty. Therapy was so good.
Thank you for sharing. Yes, I've prayed and had a promise as well....and yes, I feel there was someone in my life and they weren't obedient. Though it was very painful and brought much heartache...it has taken some years to heal from, God remained faithful to me. He is trustworthy.
Same here. Long story, but God said he settled. Jesus said his ending is tragic even though it felt more tragic for me.He also was disobedient and had a gay witchdoctor boss that interfered with a lot.
I could so relate to the way you described the effect of loneliness on one's spirit. I really enjoyed listening and the way you communicate. I wish I could meet you and just share life stories.
Am glad that i just find this channel. Truth is this situation is scary. No one has never plan to be single. But only God the master of time n circumstances knows better. And so i will wait on his promises. I just pray to keep my faith and hope strong. Amen
The Holy Spirit is a He not a she. “Howbeit, when he, the Spirit of truth is come, He will guide you into all truth, for he shall not speak of himself but whatsoever he shall hear, that he shall speak and he shall show you things to come.” - Jesus Christ speaking about the Holy Spirit. Your vision is not from the God of the Bible. Let God be true and every man a liar. Every word of God is pure. Yes LORD! Every word.
Singleness is a devotion to God for those that are called to it, for a season, or for a lifetime. While in that season its important to have family, friends and community support.
Rita I’m so grateful to you for helping us navigate this space. It has been such a painful process. I’ve been single for 7yrs the ache I’ve carried for marriage and family has been sooo deep. I’m 42 never been married. I’ve come to that place of surrender and not driving myself crazy with the how and when. 🌸
So profound.. this popped up in my feed. I wasn't specifically searching.. but I do and have struggled w loneliness and being single my entire life. 53 year old single mom.. the Lord gave me a beautiful daughter through adoption almost 19 years ago.. the Lord never gave me a promise of marriage.. I just assumed it would happen.. looking back.. I made some choices that probably informed my singleness but... I totally relate to what you are speaking to.. being seen as " defective" , not wanting another's " baggage" , yes to raising up a new generation.. I have a daughter so I'm teaching her to have the higher standards I didn't.. I don't have that call to be married anymore.. at this point I'm praying for total acceptance and contentment as I transition my daughter into adulthood and try to help her navigate the path the Lord has for her.. I appreciate this conversation. God bless you.
Those men I fell for when I was young, did not love me. I stopped looking 25 years ago. I do love weddings though - I would go to anyone's wedding just to enjoy the extravagant beautiful display and celebration. Jesus is the man of my dreams, and that wedding will be supremely spectacular. This life is a vapor, youth is fleeting anyway. That eternal wedding is something to look forward to.
Beautiful words thank you for sharing. I am single and 65 and have been through many seasons and changes of the heart and have asked and talked to the Lord about this many times. I can relate to these words. This has ministered to my heart so well.
I’ve met famous rappers and been around famous DJ ‘s in em I never felt giddy and star struck till Rita came to my church in kelowna years ago thanks love your music it’s going to be worth it
Thanks for speaking on this topic. I have felt it is even difficult to connect with other believers because so much they come to church with families. I feel out of step and invisible a lot of the time especially in church and worship settings. I am 45 and I an actually divorced with no children. I do not have hope of ever not being single. My pool is so small now that I am a christian as most people are nice people but unbelievers. also, there are much scripture saying this is a sin so I do not know I could even date without feeling that I am in sin. I still feel angry and confused about how to be at peace with it and in my life and relationship with the lord.
Oh my goodness, these are the same questions that I've asked and frankly just don't understand. I too never thought that I would be single at this stage in my life, (60 yrs old). The Lord has spoken to about a husband for the past 24yrs. I have received numerous prophetic words of confirmation. I too believe that I have lived the consequences of wrong decisions of others. You hit just about every question and thought Ive had in regard singleness. Thank you for your transparency and encouragement to continue standing for the promise.
Maybe I found your video on purpose. I am 64 and still single. God told me in my 30’s that He has someone for me. I have prayed, decreed, rebuked, prayed off generational curses, dated adnauseam. I attend church faithfully (where I see many more women than men in the pews). I tithe faithfully. I pray for my future husband. I pray that God raises up an army of Godly Christian men. I eat healthy, exercise. And…. I wait.
I wouldn’t have phrased it like this but I have definitely taken God to therapy with the Spirit and it’s life changing! He’s the wonderful Counselor! He’s so gracious to help bring us healing and clarity!
Wow, this is beautiful, thank you. So many valuable takeaways, especially 'Sanctuary of resolve/Peace that you grab hold of', 'Perfect timing is laced with peace' and 'Pray yourself out of/ Take responsibility for the season that you are in'.
Thank you one again for saying what i cannot put words to. Regarding what the church says and does with single women particularly as we get older. I am waiting, been waiting, believing but the thoughts that are the heaviest are those that include: women can minister with their husband, woman can be mothers in their 20’s and 30’s with their husband, women can be mothers to young people when they are themselves real mothers…. I have never felt such rejection from the world and the ungodly as I feel and see from the so called body of Christ. Even though He calls white hair a sign of wisdom, we support and love on the youth to follow this path b/c if they don’t, and really we’re speaking of women, if women don’t get married at the proper time, then what will we do with them?! The depth of my sadness not just in my own loneliness and the pain of waiting on the promise i know I’ve had since a child to be a mother and to have a kingdom marriage but to move in spite of it, to obey God in the other things He’s called me to do, things I know He’s been preparing me for, when all i hear and feel is the rejection from the Body b/c I’m not “whole” in their timing and in their observation. Even though I’m just resolved to not make this move out of my own effort but to wait for the Lord. Thank you for being so honest and well spoken to put words to the pain and reality of my heart. And TBH I think the Body hinders the Spirit when they hinder women. But i wonder if our tears aren’t bottled up and used to pay for some of the mercy that God sends out to the earth.
So empowered to remain steadfast in the Lord. Wow. I celebrate the courage and resolve Holy Spirit has formed in you. What an impartation of true surrender and raw relationship with God. A fresh breath a real air.
I’m done making excuses for the things that did not or might will not happen. Done with the excuses that it’s because God cares and He knows better. Stop bypassing that being alone can be or become painful. Stop waiting, go out when you have the chance. Know the kind of guy/ woman you would like to spend your life with. But stop waiting, just go for it. God will open the door as you’re taking one step at a time.
Yes I agree, 48 never married. I've come to believe I need to create my own actions, proverb says man takes the steps and God directs his path. If u want to meet someone I need to go out to the places people are and talk to a guy. I've waited most of my life for certain things to happen and they didnt, I need to take practical actions and just get out there and just do it. I don't think it's some spiritual mystery, i dont believe in waiting seasons anymore. I just want to make the most of the time i have left and enjoy meeting people along the way. If I meet a special guy, great, if I don't, then I have much to look forward to in the new heaven, new earth Jesus will create, and thank God there will be no loneliness or pain there.
Certainly the most powerful and deep “let’s be real” true message of encouragement I have heard in a long time! Thank you thank you thank you for being real, honest and reminding us that it could be that we are stuck in this season because of somebody else’s choice and not because we didn’t hear from God. I know in my heart he calls me for mariage. As you do. And your message encouraged me not to lose hope but also to surrender to God’s timing. 38 this year, almost married once but didn’t work (praise God I can say today; I’d have marry the wrong guy) but still waiting for my future husband and some days in this season of loneliness are unbearable but one day at a time by God’s grace. Thank you for your message!!! 🙏🏼♥️
@RitaSpringer I've been blessed by your worship for many years and have known you are single and wondered how you have processed it. Thank you for sharing your story and giving us a voice. Living wholeheartedly for Jesus and not seeing God answer the valid need and for a mate is the most difficult thing ive walked through. Im 45 and have waited also and am going through a breakup with the man I really thought the Lord was bringing me together with. You released this right when i needed it. I'm also encouraged that you are standing on His promise of marriage even in later years. That has been my posture as well. Like Abraham who against all hope believed God and became the father of nations. May we continue to have this faith. I pray we'll see breakthrough for many here who have written. I'll be praying for you too Rita. I look forward to you putting out more on this topic
This was SO good and extremely refreshing. Its very rare that I find someone whose journey resonates with mine. Thank you for so gracefully sharing your experience. I admire your faith, your perseverance, your vulnerability and transparency. God bless you.❤
Sometimes we want perfection when we aren’t perfect. I waited and waited like 20 years and when i finally met the one it turned out he was exactly like me lol. God has a sense of humor to show us He is enough and after dating him for 8 years and he never proposed and now if he does propose i wont care. Just Give Me Jesus. ❤❤❤❤❤
Single divorced more than ten years, I’ve grown and better in more ways than I could have imagined, Thank my Heavenly FATHER for allowing me to experience time with HIM! While growing Spiritually, in ways I never imagined, yes! I still have a way to go, but, I go with HIM! And one day I hope Blessing me and every daughter of HIS, with HIS CHOSEN spouse.
I’m going to be 45 in March. One day about three years ago I finally got tired of the constant pining, searching , hoping, wondering and questioning from others that I just prayed Lord I don’t want this anymore, I don’t want to feel like this anymore And if this isn’t what you have for me, take it, I give to you, please take it. He answered that prayer and since then I don’t really think about marriage, well I do but in a hiw would it change my life if it were to happen now and would I even like that? Hiw would it affect my freedom to do what I want, whenever I want ?! Did I ever even want it or was I just tricking myself into wanting it because “ it’s what a Christian woman should want” ?! All I know is that I don’t care about it anymore. People who know me still joke with me about oh look at him he’s your type and I didn’t even notice him. People are shocked that I say oh no I like being single , I’m really NOT looking for marriage or even to date because I was that woman that always was looking . Doingbthe online dating thing, church hopping to see if there were single men , going to singles groups at different churches hoping to find the one. I was obsessed and it was taking over my life and I was done. I’m so much happier now and I thank God he took all that from me. Now I tell God if you want me to be married you’re going to have to tell me audibly in my ear that a guy is the one you want me to marry, because otherwise I’m just not interested. I like my life now how it is . I don’t know if anyone else has had a similar experience.
Thank you this was truly what I needed… I have had several words from childhood up until 4 years ago… I just turned 40… Thank you fir your transparency
Firstly Rita my goodness how I wish I had a christ living friend like you. This pouring of heart was so profound I feel stopped in my tracks. One thing I will touch on is your call to men and the state men are in. I don’t know how it is in the states but I am British born now living in Ghana for some time. What my question has been for most of my life as a single person is where are all the God fearing men? Ones with substance, not church goers but men of God will are consecrated and sold out for Christ where are they? I am 41 I have been single for most of my life. I have a Pinterest dedicated to my wedding. I haven’t had a promise from God about marriage. I think perhaps I am too carnally minded to hear him I don’t know. I agree with you on the long suffering part I guess I have always felt that partnership has come quite easily to many people, so why not me? I definitely think I have made marriage or being with someone an idol at some points, I’m challenging myself now. I recently watched a podcast on RU-vid with Pricilla and Tim or Tom somebody he’s a pastor. I so wanted to disagree with the Pricilla lady but what she was saying about men I almost couldn’t deny. I felt a deep sadness about the state of things now. I’m at that stage in my life where I feel everything I have tried to do, or to allow life to do has gone wrong. I’m almost too afraid to want anything. I just want to be able to take care of my mum. I’ve given up dreaming because what is the point. I wish I could have faith like you. The long suffering though has warn me out. I’m supposed to be fasting but I cannot even pray out loud, barely. I just listen to worship music, read the bible watch sermons, repent and just hope I get on the same page of God for my life I definitely do not have the best of attitudes. My soul is tired, and sad and disappointed. I choose to just stay here because I don’t know what other place to be in for now. I wanted to say something totally different, but hey. I am trying to make peace that perhaps singleness is for me. I will continue to travel the world by myself and hope I will feel the happiness and privilege I use to feel, rather than now the loneliness of realising how many decades I have been travelling alone and now wanting to experience one of my fav pastimes with someone I love yet that time seems to never arrive. Singleness I use to love, but roughly around 37 it just makes me feel sad. Singleness is not a state and nothing to feel wrong about or sad about. For me personally it’s not a good thing. I have chosen to be purposely alone for many seasons. Now I simply don’t want to choose to be. Thank you so much for this talk it was 👌🏾
I always watch the very first video that pops up for me. As the title came up, I could feel the sadness on my broken heart and all the stuck emotions in my throat. I am amicably divorced for the past five years. Oddly enough, it's like we are still married, and we speak several times a day and do many things together as a family. Obviously, I resonate with all of the comments here, and I do love certain parts of being single and feel blessed, but there's a part of me that would love nothing more than for God to help bring in the perfect partner - spiritually, mentally, physically and in all ways. I will wait and see if that prayer gets answered. Thank you ❤
Isn’t God’s only promise to us who walk in and live out his word, soul salvation & inheriting heavenly eternity with Him? all other aspects of life He either wills them to be or not to be, right? … for the sake of my nervous system, I’ve had to humble down and accept that not all of my expectations will be fulfilled by God, especially if it’s not in his will 🙄
Thank you for sharing Rita. At some points it felt like you were speaking my exact words and feelings. God is good and I love Him... Single or married... But I still pray He blesses me with marriage for His glory. ❣️
I was single as a new Christian and became desperate and made choices that lead to horrible sin against myself and trauma.. facing the fear of loneliness and fear of other issues, is hard but it’s better to be in his presence living your purpose than in the world outside the will of God. I was given multiple words of marriage and decided to trust the Lord and let it go and not be afraid… I’m 40 but my life is about to begin and I’m gonna walk with Jesus through this!
Your channel just popped up on my feed and wow I can really relate to all your saying. I'm in my middle age and your story is just like mine. Thank you for sharing your story ❤
