The worst mega tank Germany ever designed - The P1000 Ratte 

Have a wonderful week yourself, Sir.

Upload to Rumble. You will find much more welcome there.

Have a good week TOVARISCH squire!

You rival black adder in historic comedy

gotta be honest m8, I'd quite literally NEVER heard of HoI4 OR your channel until a few days ago, but this must be 6th or so video I've watched already! I love how you incorporate true history references into the jokes despite HoI seemingly be a "build-your-own history" game and the props/costumes are ON POINT. Heck, the little details in the sound design are also impressive! Glad to see good humor with good quality. You guys are great actors, too! I know the whole "Brittish accent on a German character" is a running joke now, but the acting really sells it

I have a feeling most weapons designers in Germany during the war are doing that

To be fair, what better way to buy time? Like instead of relying him coming up with ideas, just say "but the way there is an issue with that."

I like how he just leaves at the end

That was the true purpose of Germany's wonder weapons. It prevented Irreplaceable engineers from being drafted, given a semi reliable Luger and trying to persuade the Soviets not to enter Germany

And plus it was red army idea to but Bombardier on dogs now go learn history

best line

Best line of the whole skit. Fucking genius writing.

You know, I actually missed that one. One thing for it, watch the video again.

Missed that the first time :D

I missed that the first few times(every time until I saw this comment.).

Rubber for me. Gosh I love me those 109's.

You guys have resources? Me and my zero resources as Yemen (don't ask how I got there) are jealous. I don't even have factories to use those any of those zero resources.

@@AlreadyTakenTag At least nothing goes to waste.

Oil for me

@@AlreadyTakenTag bro, as yemen i had to invade saudi arabia JUST SO I COULD GET FUEL.

If you keep watching, we'll keep writing this krupp.

@@SquireComedy I will squire i will

Dont worry, he'll stop soon

@@stinkymonke3622 "please kill me" "Sorry, only got one bullet"

The 1940s edition of did you bring the sugar

We love an unintentionally topical joke.

We've all been there.

Well, yeah, we all have been there.. thing is that uk is there right now :D hardly any fuel to be found

I'm a Yank but I got the reference, lol. Good one.

Hahah! Sometimes, I don't know if they're funny or utterly rubbish. In this case, it was both.

@@SquireComedy all the best ones are.

Loved that too. Very clever

How ironic, he actually turned out BETTER then the Ratte.

Lol imagine losing to a bunch of slow-ass outdated biplanes.

12 tons a pretty good light tank

"Hey, Ivan, wasn't that building on different side of the street last winter?"

You do know Germany and Russia are on the same continental plate right?

@estadiofifa10lol 1 Yes a very poorly executed one.

@@antongonist8294 It was executed well, you just aren't very bright.

@@thepreacher7399 I am not very bright? But I am not the one who thinks the countries are on different plates.

Thank you very much, that means a great bloody deal.

@@SquireComedy Your'e welcome!

Yeah, but look at the sheer number of Medals of Honor, Silver Stars and Bronze Stars we gave out in WW2.

​@@shockwave6213 Quite frankly, every man who made the landing on D-Day deserves a Medal of Honor.

@@Aredel you're rather debasing the currency there.

its engine had enough horsepower to move at 40 kph

It’s literally the equivalent of people making meme tanks in Sprocket.

That or inventing reasons not to get conscripted

@@VineFynn literally become an engineer without actually building a thing

@@Phantom-bh5ru yeah but the engine is probably very unreliable and second and most important the transmission

Haha, indeed. And nice.

Well, it was a battlecruiser. Designed more for speed then for armor. There were very few true battleships in WW2.

@@molybdaen11 uh....wat? There were quite a few battleships, what are you talking about?

@@IgnoredAdviceProductions By name maybe. But by design most of them followed the "speed is armor" doctrine. A true battleship would be able to take damage and cause damage likewise. Have you seen Drafniels channel? He goes into deep with this.

@@molybdaen11 Fast battleships don't forego the armor though, but ok. Many treaty and post treaty battleships are better armored than their WW1 contemporaries. Your opinion on treaty and post-treaty battleships seems skewed.

I see the Zippo tanks have arrived because he got majorly roasted

I thought you were trying to give them a compliment.

Thanks Klaus! Now...back to the front!

Mapman does great sponsor

Brilliant

You wait till our stockpile of puns runs dry. We'll be reduced to musket fire.

@@SquireComedy that’s still 2-3 per minute :D

And the one scared SS Machinegunner on the MG42.

That's a lot of jokes!

Love the fact somebody got that. Such a brilliant series.

Thank god im not the only one

THAT'S what was playing!? Fun bit of trivia, that.

P-47’s: MINE MINE MINE…

Allied Infantry: Wait for it... Wait for it... There! The Transmission broke, Charge!

@@tanith117( for my origonal starwars battle front fans) The ratte: *drives 4 feet* The final drive: "although im leaving .........may the force be with you"

B-17G: BOMBS AWAY!

B-22 Superfortress with the Little Boy: Oops! Wrong country! Or was it... ?

Considering the sketch opened with him French kissing a PPK I don't think it's all that subtle...

Maus is a scary name tho😂

I don’t know, naming your tank after a small rodent doesn’t seem menacing… How is this relevant to this comment exactly?

I could write village pantomimes at this rate.

@@SquireComedy OH NO YOU COULDN'T!

Thanks mate, that means a great deal.

Hahah! Thanks dude!

@Squire Thank you for the quality content good sir! Keep up the excellent work as always! Cheers!

I get the joke, but it was used to shoot around corners

They were just beating around the bush, or shooting around it, that is.

Pretty sure a: Panther Tiger 88mm flak 36/37/41 128mm flak 75mm PaK 40/41/42 128 PaK 44 King Tiger Jagdtiger Nashorn Sturer Emil Dicker Max Waffentrager Brumbar Jagdpanther Elephant Maus Sturmtiger Could easily penetrate the Churchill’s armour form battle distance without too many issues, also I’m counting only the German side because if we consider all possible weapons, including planes, from all belligerents the list would be way too long.

@@truekhmer7292 I'm suggesting that the Germans should have used them.

@@hi_-bz7wf won't the soviet 122mm just go straight through though? The is-2, is-1, kv85, t-34 85, isu152 etc

@@Charlietolemy They had a surprisingly bad Penetration capability due to their two-piece ammunition system. The IS-2 and its other variants with a 122mm gun were more used as support vehicles for infantry pushes, using High Explosive shells against fortifications and entrenched positions. Nothing really came of Anti-Armor capabilities until the 122mm D-25 came into service. The D-25 was used on Late-Production IS-2s, the IS-3, the ISU-122, and later the IS-8/T-10. The 130mm was the go-to AT gun for Russia in the late war however.

@@Charlietolemy That's why I said nothing short of an is-2 could penetrate it. The 152mm could probably penetrate it too.

Cheers for that, Scott.

@@SquireComedy appreciate it sir

As well as the entire air force i suppose .

That would've been better than that WT E-100 event

Should be the target for an easy warthunder air mission

1 P1000 vs 3 KV6

I'll see your Soviet anti tank dogs and raise you American incendiary bats.

@@bthsr7113 🤣🤣 the hangers on fire.

According to some german reports and orders, these dogs actually worked sometimes. Tank crews were ordered to shoot any approaching dog because it was hard to spot if it has a bomb strapped on or not.

@@user-xh9pu2wj6b Really now? That's new. I thought the only success with animals as weapons were the pigeons with hot coal on they tail.

@@molybdaen11 they worked, but it wasn't really worth it considering possible friendly fire and the time it takes to train the dogs, compared to almost no results. During the entire battle of Kursk AT dogs only destroyed around 12 tanks(Zaloga, Steve. The Red Army of the Great Patriotic War, 1941-45. Oxford, UNITED KINGDOM: Osprey Publishing. 1989. pp. 43.)

*were And yes. Prime target for atillery spotters and aircraft. :D

Allied artillery: FIRST ONE TO LAND TEN SHELLS ON THE BIG SLOW DUMB TARGETS GETS TEN BUUCKS!!!

@@Dreagostini Indeed. A squadron of rocket-armed Hawker Typhoons or P-47 Thunderbolts would have turned that thing into scrap metal.

@@Nachtsider I'd like that.

@@Nachtsider No I'm sure the not 40mm AA defenses strapped to the top, the lack of a good radar, and the lack of a proximity fuse would have no impact of the effectiveness of the AA on top of the tank. I DARE SAY WE MASS PRODUCE THEM TO STEM THE ALLIED BOMBING CAMPAIGN!

Hard to talk with a big barrel in your mouth.

@@SquireComedy sure is, i have experience with these things

@@Jilve69 Easy lads. Easy.

Wouldn't that be a "muzzled" 'Come in?'

@@SquireComedy 7.65 is a large calibre? That... explains a lot about Adolf

N i e n

Tankfish reference

There was also the scharnhorst-class cruiser consisting of Scharnhorst and Gneisenau cruisers

Thanks for saving me the trouble. The Comet did have the problem that fuelling was dangerous and was only done directly before launch so reaction times weren't that good. And "landing" with fuel left wasn't recommended. Good thing it only had fuel for a few minutes. IIRC most of them were lost to either enemy ground attacks or technical failures. They were a cool concept but never had any great impact. The designation of the Scharnhorst is a bit difficult. It was intended to be a battleship with 38cm guns (some guns the Ratte was supposed to get) but only got 28cm guns which means that other navies regarded her as more of a battlecruiser. (That and her good speed.) And when it comes to stupid ideas the Monster tops the Ratte easily. I mean it's a Dora railway gun (remember 800mm gun) without the need for rails but horribly slow and would use up fuel like crazy. Both projects never went further than paper designs and sketches. The Nazis were crazy but not that crazy. We do have vehicles now that meet the dimensions of those vehicles like digging machines.

The Comet is pretty fast...at killing the pilot... To be fair, the things got a damn rocket engine, so its pretty different from cold war era jets. Also, the range of Comet was utter garbage, and once you’re out of fuel, you’re essentially left with a glider, that has got to « land » on skids, without damaging itself. Also, building an aircraft with a rocket engine might have worked if it wasn’t put into combat in the very late war, when Germany was desperately out of fuel and running out of resources. Add dodgy construction and poor quality control, and you’ve got a questionable aircraft that was too little to late, and could do nothing to help shift the tide of Germany’s non existent air supremacy in 1945. Anyway, don’t take this too seriously. Cheers!

The Scharnhorst-Class Warships don't really fit the definition of either Battleship or Battlecruiser. Their 11" guns straddled the line between 8" guns of Heavy Cruisers and the 14"-16" of proper Battleships. Yet they don't have the heavy guns of Battlecruisers, which were in line with Battleships, typically over 14" in size. Their max speed was more in line with Heavy Cruisers & Battlecruisers (over 30 knots) rather than Battleships (typically 30 knots and under). Yet their armor was ridiculously thick and strong for a Heavy Cruiser or Battlecruiser, up to 13.8" belt armor and 14" turret armor, which is more in light with proper battleships. The German classification for these oversized Heavy Cruisers was "Panzerschiff" (Armored Ship, similar to the older "Armored Cruiser" term for heavily armored Cruisers of the pre-Dreadnought era).

@@GreyWolfLeaderTW I guess we can say that she was planned as a battleship (with proper 380mm guns) and turned out to be something else.

Yeeeess

Free ppk and honestly better than trying to find a mosin

Yeah, not checking for wristwatch or pocket watch destroyed all immersion.

Haha, nice. Thanks dude.

They were hoisted up by their own petards LOL

No it would have won ww2 they had flak guns and they shoot down airplanes and they could destroy the red army get Russia and then take back france

In 1942?

Kickstarter project or what? :D

A historical comedy about the the German-Soviet conflict? Sign me up!

Our pleasure!

Also a good way to cover up the fact that your cast is somewhat... limited.

Also fitting as the last time Hitler was seen in public he was handing them out to some volksturm defenders - mostly old guys and kids that were deluded enough to think they could take the Red Army in a straight-up fight.

@@wilberwhateley7569 alot of germans where forced esp the kids

They keep telling that, but is there any proof? I guess it would not matter anymore :)

@@molybdaen11 Uh, He shot himself with a Walther PPK

@@molybdaen11 - It is well known that Hitler have two Walther PPK as his personal side-arm. Hitlers personal body-guard who survived the war stated it in his memoirs as he enters Hitler's room one pistol is by the table in front of Eva Braun which she didn't use and one is by Hitler's hand.

Thanks, Job. They can take hundreds of man hours, but It's a laugh. :)

Oof

Thank you very much!

@@SquireComedy loving it where do you get the uniforms

@@SquireComedy just wondering

@@wobbuffetisthebest1297 Asking for a friend?

@@PetarJovanovic993 yeah

Thanks for that Teslo!

There's something wrong.

Wow, thanks!

Yeah my favorite one

Teach them for being so mean to dogs

The British experimented with trained sea lions against U Boats. They tossed fish from the decks of submarines. Turns out the sea lions developed a preference for British submersibles ( no doubt after trying to get fish from a U Boat only to be told "Verpiss Haupt.")

Haha!

Thanks for watching mate, It's our pleasure.

Thanks dude!

Thanks for watching matey, our pleasure.

Mostly because Artillerie in the arguably meaning isn’t really in the game

@@sergeantsharkseant it’s not available in pvp games Only in Scenarios so… yeah At least it’s op as hell Also I’m talking about a mod so do agree without mods, it’s not in the game

Yep. Great series, that.

Thanks mate, bloody glad you think so!

Careful now

Cough, Patreon.

Let me guess, you want your own video?

hah, don't drop your hopes. You remember "How British won the war"?

@@SquireComedy I was going to talk you into it, but yes, that's correct.

Cheers! We'll try!