One of the best things for me was that Irena obviously got the "ick" when Zack sang, along with the majority of America. But there are videos on insta of Zack singing to Bliss and she just looks so enchanted and enamored by him. Bliss looks genuinely in love with him when he's singing (probably because she knows hes singing for her!). My favorite thing about them is that everything Irena disliked and said was a flaw (too much eye contact, awkwardness, nerdiness) were things that Bliss embraced. It makes you realize that aspects of personality aren't flaws per se, they just aren't for everyone. And there are Bliss like people out there who will love every bit of you
@@theorderofthebees7308It doesn’t matter if you’re authentically you if you choose the Irinas of the world instead of the Bliss’. Multiple guys chose the toxic, self-centered women over the higher quality choices that genuinely wanted them. Zach chose Irina instead of Bliss. Paul chose Micah over Amber. The Nigerian guy chose Micah over Chelsea. All these guys choosing toxic women they have to chase over women who validate them. Men should always choose the women that choose them. Especially in 2023. Women have so many options w/ IG and FB and dating apps in addition to irl, that a man needs to have a woman who pursues him to keep her interested. It’s the only way. Don’t pick women you have to chase.
When Zack broke up with Bliss, she didn’t vilify him. She accepted his choice even though she disagreed with it. That’s emotional maturity. When Irina thought Zack was going in a different direction, she threatened to leave the show. That’s emotional blackmail.
And Irina childish self only wanted him to stay on the show with her childish friend Micah who had just gotten choosen. She was playing with him the whole time. Irina was emotionally immature.
@@lovethatdirtywater78 😂😂 I was thinking that too well Josh said that and Jackie wasn't mad about it. Although I guess she didn't know he said it to more than one person 😬😬.
I completely agree, from Zach’s perspective, he saw Bliss taking bad about Irina and Irina staying respectful of Bliss, so he interpreted Bliss as being the mean girl. I’m not at all surprised that he chose Irina.
@@WilliamsPinch so true...here is a woman on one side who is making cake for you ,talking mature stuff and one the other hand there is a woman who herself is saying she is mean to people.. and you are still choosing the mean girl. I mean bliss was not wrong when she said the kind of person you choose shows how good a judge you are of peoples charachter. Only benefit of doubt i can give to zack is that Irina was such a good player.
@@preityb200 I personally think he was afraid, you can see his reaction to her saying her father was not liking her boyfriend's or something like he was judgmentally. He was judge his whole life so I think this was something really hard for him to go through. Also Irena had the bullying storey and all and giving ilhim the dream of liking him like he is no Mather was, especially that he knows she was not perfect( I mean nobody is perfect but Bliss you can only see the good side in the pods). I mean on the last part I understand him, I have my problems and far from perfect someone beiing like to good, and looking like he has all together I would feel insecure. I think it was something like this.( Hope is understandable, English is not my first language)
My biggest beef with Zach is how dismissive he was of Bliss' feelings when she was still feeling upset about being his second choice. I feel like he didn't earn her trust back enough.
Yes! It felt like such a missed opportunity to build back her trust that he never apologized (from what we saw on camera) for the emotional pain he caused her. He could have owned his poor choice and its effects on Bliss better, I think.
I'm not a huge fan of Zack. I feel he used his trauma to win people over and it worked. There's plenty of people that have trauma but don't lead with it to get sympathy.
I agree with your analysis but then I remembered that they could’ve most likely talked more off camera bc what he said to her mother and sister was a lot more empathetic to the situation … bc I admit I was triggered 😂
I think that Zack has been hurt so much by words, that any type of affirmations will make him happy. So when Bliss is being harsher with her words but being honest, Zack only focused on her words but didnt realise how her actions showed how much she loved him. While Irena offered him empty words that he wants to hear, but his brain knew that she didn't actually give a shit about him.
Zach's decision to inform Bliss's family about his intentions to rekindle their relationship shows a level of emotional maturity. He understands that his actions in the past may have caused hurt and pain, and is willing to face any criticism from Bliss's family. This demonstrates his commitment to rebuilding trust and repairing the damage caused.
I was so upset when Zack broke up with Bliss not just bc it was tragic and clearly (to us) the wrong choice, but also because Bliss's response so whole heartedly proved that she was the one with love and maturity and ready for this process, in contrast to Irena who was immature as fuck, even if her words in the pods tricked Zack. It just made me want to rip my hair out for Bliss
Im like the point where they say Bliss knew she messed up by saying X about Irina....mmm what about the parts Zach messed up on? Bliss was right, it did show his judgement.
Bliss's emotional intelligence is awe inspiring. From recognising her needs, asserting boundaries and accepting Zack without apology is incredible. I hope her and Zack have an amazing life together!
When I started watching your videos in January I ended up beginning my therapy journey in February. It has been a transforming process for me thus far, thank you so much. I am in a much healthier place and you have a hand in that. All the best for you and your future✨
The thing you said about the guys generally saying that they love their partner because of how they made them feel struck a chord with me. One time for Valentine’s Day with my ex we wrote cards with lists of why we loved them to give to the other, and my boyfriend’s list was predominantly about how I made him feel. I remember being a bit upset by that because it felt like it was more about him than me
I don't think Bliss messed up by talking about Irina; Zack messed up by not believing her. You're supposed to be able to confide in the person you're going to marry. Bliss tried to tread carefully, but I think she should have been *more* explicit about what was happening.
I don't know at this point if she was more explicit it might have looked like she really hates Irina and make her look bad. As opposed to Irina who in the pods didn't say anything overly negative about bliss. I think at the end of the day Irina just played the game better whilst Bliss was too honest. It worked against her in the pods.
What I really noticed is the Zack seems like he's possibly neurodivergent. That would explain the interrupting, eccentric qualities, and awkward moments in conversations. I think Bliss really accepted and loved him for his authentic self. They remind me of my relationship with my neurodivergent partner (we both have autism and I have ADHD)
I noticed that as well. I have ADHD and a lot of Zack's traits are stuff that I do. Even the sensitivity to rejection so I could see why he chose Irina initially. I remember being constantly called "awkward", "clumsy", "eccentric", "gullible", "blunt", "loud", "rude" etc., a lot of things I have seen people calling Zack. But this man is just neurodivergent and I'm glad he found someone who accepted him as is.
I don't care how Zack perceived it, when Bliss told Zack it was a red flag that he couldn't see what a shit person Irena was, I was 1000% on board with her. I dunno about yall, but I don't wanna spend the rest of my life with someone who puts me on the same par with an asshole and thinks we're equally worthy as a partner.
Remember, he doesn't see the Irena that Bliss sees, she's in the pods with him, he sees a misunderstood girl, from the wrong side of the tracks, who grew up rough like he did
@@regularity2556 exactly! He got Irina’s representative and Bliss didn’t then she attacked his character for not agreeing that Irina was not a good person
He no longer believed they were equally good partners once he saw for himself all the things Bliss and only the audience had. All he had to go off of was a pleasant voice telling him sweet nothings and Bliss telling him about stuff he hadn’t seen; there’s definitely validity in the fact that he should have taken Bliss’ word since she had already been showing she was of good character - but that would be hard to discern as different than Irina who was mostly just sweet - nothing-ing him / charming him to stay on the show.
Let's imagine that we didn't see all the shitty thighs Irina was doing in the pods. The producers cut it out and we can only see nice Irina from thee pods. Then Bliss ccome with her comments about Irina being rude and mean. Would we just trust her words or think that she is trying to manipulate Zack to win him? I think that in general in this show, talking about other contestants is just bad taste and bad idea. It's all just gossip and can influence someone's choice.
@@Ola_Stawinska ok but zach told Irina himself that she was a vicious person. And told others shes immature and plays girl games. To an extend he seen through the sweet facade, he just chose to ignore that.
This therapist is spot on. Poverty connects people sometimes in a negative way. I’ve felt that way in the past and felt similar to Zack. I knew why he chose irina for being similar to his back story. It may also have been a self esteem thing too. Glad it worked out for them. L
Men just don't like good women. If you're available and nurturing, you get the shitty treatment and that's what happened to Bliss. How are you going to choose someone that told you she forgot about your birthday to the one that stayed up and put effort into making you something special on your day to show that she cared about you. I knew right away that Irina wasn't a good person. She was always laughing at the other girls and being mean for no reason. Bliss did tell Zach that he doesn't see what she sees in Irina. She was up to no good and didn't care about Zach one bit.
Since you asked! I would love it if you did more videos on relationship dynamics in families, friendships and romantic relationships. Selfishly I’d love takedowns of cultural norms that perpetuate unhealthy relationships. For example, rom coms always puts pursuer-distancer dynamics on a pedestal. You’re really good at breaking things down and balancing both theory and practicalities. Plus all your videos are rooted in strong values and heart. I love your content! Keep them coming.
He didnt see Irina as the nice one. He called her vicious and childish when discussing his choices with one of the men. I think Bliss was what he wanted, but he had a major insecure moment.
Steph that meeting between Zack and Bliss was about 2 hrs long and we only saw probably about 5 to 10 minutes of footage. Both Zack and Bliss said on a podcast. He said he did not go there to win her back. He went there to apologize and give her a gift, but there was so much chemistry between them that they couldn’t deny how they felt. Bliss said she had to fight hard to hold back her smile when she saw him. Zack said when he saw her he said to himself I’m in trouble. Waiting for the Micah and Paul video. Also to add perspective their pod dates were 5 or more hrs long and they had 2 dates per day, 1 day date and 1 night date. Remember when Irina said that he had 10 straight hours dating Bliss and she had been waiting to talk to him all day. So we miss a lot of conversations.
I loved your analysis on why Zach chose Irina at the beginning even though for us viewers, Bliss was obviously a better match for him. We often forget that the participants in the experience don't know how the others behave and act outside the pods. Subscribed ❤
From what I saw on TV, I feel like Zack exhibits behaviors of autism spectrum disorder. Obviously, I'm not diagnosing, but he's very similar to my child in the way he stares too long, is deemed "eccentric", interrupts and doesn't totally understand social cues (just keeps talking on a subject he loves). He also seemed genuine and thoughtful and just needed to find the right person who understood him and Bliss seemed unaffected and loved those qualities about him. I was unsure about Bliss and Zack at first, but in the end, I thought they were very real. It gave me hope that my child will find someone who loves and understands them for who they are!
Absolutely loved this video and commentary. This was my favorite story of the series because it was by far the most genuine and realistic to me. Most of us will pick several “wrong” people before we pick the “right” one. Sometimes the wrong person becomes the right one. Most times the opposite happens, and we break up and grieve and move on to the next person, which is basically what happened here except on a much more accelerated timeline. In that sense, I do not think what happened is so unusual. I loved how all of Zack’s quirks and eccentricities that “gave the ick” to Irina were ultimately the things Bliss loved about him, and isn’t that what this is all about? Finding the person who understands your weirdness and loves you for it? So happy for them. I’m happy for Tiff and Brett and Lauren and Cam too, but they’re all the cool kids. It’s more heartwarming for me to see the nerds find each other and fall in love. I’m so glad Bliss didn’t let her pride get in the way of her happiness. As for topics for videos, I sometimes feel like my partner isn’t always very aware of his emotions and has trouble articulating them or even recognizing them, and have always wondered why that is and how he can improve at it. Sometimes I feel like I might have hurt him (unintentionally) but even if I ask directly he’ll deny it and blow it off. And maybe I’m wrong but his facial expression sure says otherwise.
I get that Zack’s mom has struggled, but I felt like he almost adopted it as a personality type, he always brought it up. I think she would be proud about how he and his sister turned out, but I feel like he just kept bringing it up as an issue
I agree. I don't believe every negative detail about your past is anyone's business. He could have just said my Mom was a single parent, had to struggle for a living to make ends meet which resulted in an unstable, inconsistent upbringing.
No one is talking about this, but I happen to think that Zack’s choice of Irina may have been influenced by Paul and Micha. Since Paul and Zack were friends, I could see Paul getting intel from Micha about the girls and I could see Micha putting in a good word for Irina. That really could have played into his decision too.
Zack had mentioned he hadn’t told someone he loved them since he was 21. And I had gotten vibes all along like he hadn’t dated much, and this supposed traumatic event of being judged by another person’s family happened a long time ago at a younger age, such as a high school or college sweetheart. I wondered if his girlfriend at the time still lived with her parents and/or his mom was still in the picture. He definitely rubbed some women the wrong way with his little test, and maybe eliminated some he didn’t have to, though how fortunate he still found Bliss. But if things hadn’t worked out for him, he screamed someone needing therapy bc that is a long time to be holding onto to something that happened with a much younger person in probably much different circumstances.
I could not stop crying after reading Zach’s receipts. Once I read the line of how his mom wrote “somehow she found a little hope in her hopelessness” I just started to bawl. Life’s hardships can really take a toll and for his and his mom’s story to turn out so beautifully just made my heart so warm.
I love that Bliss stood up to her father. Her father’s feelings were valid because this is a strange situation, but Bliss speaking up for herself was great.
Last season disturbed my soul also. It almost made me want to stop watching the series, but I'm glad I decided to keep going with it. Zack & Bliss are my new favorite couple!
Regarding the parental approval...I think people who feel they are loved unconditionally by their parents feel comfortable disagreeing with them. Bliss knows if she does something her father doesn't like or approve of... he's still going to love her. He's still going to support her and be there for her. Yes, it's important to care what our families think, but for someone mature and responsible and experienced, like Bliss, your family's opinions shouldn't control your decisions.
I was happy that Zach & Bliss worked out 🥹❤️ I loved them two from the beginning. I didn’t think negatively of Bliss giving him a second chance, because people make wrong decisions sometimes & deserve forgiveness & to prove themselves 🤷🏾♀️ Bliss is such a sweetheart to me 🫶🏾 I learned so much from her as far as how to be vulnerable, go for what you want, not worrying about what others think & how to communicate when it comes to love/dating.
I think Zack was cutting people off because he's neurodivergent, it's my perspective that he and Paul got along so well because they are either adhd/asd or both. Thats why they're so analytical, and why Zack was being made fun of for being 'goofy'. There were other things that I recognised in them. Of course I cant know for sure but it felt like a possibility.
I immediately understood that too , with Zack especially , I recognised him possibly being neurodivergent like i thought it was common knowledge but apparently not
I love bliss. I think besides Lauren and Cameron... they are my 2nd favorite couple. I heard some people mention that they think that Bliss may get back at Zak, on the wedding day. That thought have never entered my mind. You can tell how she truly loved him from day one. You can tell how she was raised that she is not that type of person. Kiddos to her mom and dad for raising such a sweet person.
About Zack cutting off people: I get why it comes off as rude and selfcentered but I personally didn't see any other situations where there's lack of respect on Zack's side, so in my opinion there is another reason for that. As a neurodivergent person myself I got the impression that Zack may have a neurodivergency too...
I would love a video on ways to fix an avoidant attachment style. How to approach dating in the technology age with dating apps (something along those lines).
when you were talking about the mirror with irina + Micah and bliss + Chelsea, I thought you meant physically LOL because what are the odds that they each look like each other too
Can you do a video on LGBTQ+ and not getting parents approval? Navigating being newly LGBTQ+? You mentioned briefly people wanting parents approval and makes me think of my current situation where I know I won’t get it. I feel like that type of video would be extremely helpful to a lot of us out there suffering right now. Thank you for your content- you put a ton of hard work into these videos and it shows! ❤
I do agree he picked Irina because she was a 'safer' choice. But i also dont think he was 100% fooled by her because he seen through her facade but still bet on her anyway. Bliss was right about his judgement. I also dont think he respected Bliss enough after, didnt really let her talk about how she felt being rejected because he was too busy protecting his own ego, yet keeps bringing up he picked her 2nd (even in wedding vows). Zach said Bliss is pretentious yet he is too. And testing people in the pods with bait questions is very unhealthy. Nevertheless he didnt deserve the absymal treatment by Irina. I do think he gets away with a lot because fangirls of him will defend anything he does. Bliss is definitely a prize though and I thinks she deserves better than Zach
Is it cause for concern if someone says how the other person makes *them* feel when asked when they love their partner? You mentioned that men often do that, while women tend to speak more about who their boyfriend/husband is as a person
29:35 I’ve said this in other videos. I don’t think bliss was his second choice. Irina made that choice for him bc SHE didn’t want to be with him. If things would’ve worked out for him and Irina, Bliss wouldn’t even have been a choice.
Same way you admire Bliss, I admire you! You have such a positive and compassionate aura and I learn so much from you! For future video ideas can you consider the following please: emotional maturity and emotional intelligence 🙏There is a lot out there on how to heal from traumas and bad relationships but not a lot on how to have healthy relationships and what they look like. Maybe a some advice on living intuitively, green flags in relationships etc. Just share from your fountain of wisdom haha 😊PS have you seen love is blind Japan? The whole thing is so wholesome and they really take the time to find out if they are a good match and look at their potential partners capacity for kindness and how they care about taking others feelings into consideration. I found it quite beautiful. Thank you for your videos!
In the tv/film realm, I'd LOVE to see you react to the Queen Charlotte Bridgerton series. None of the therapists I follow have talked about it yet, particularly the struggle King George had with his mental health struggles. For non-tv based content, I'd love a video about how to positively nurture you mental health if you can't see a therapist or navigating difficult familial structures within a marriage. Fitting into an existing familial structure as a new person is tough, particularly when your in-laws may not be fully open to you. My husband and I also had different expectations about how family was supposed to fit into our lives. So how do you navigate that?
I have a hard time finishing videos without skipping around, your videos are the only ones I watch all the way through. The way you deliver your interpretations always help me dig deeper into my own thoughts. thank you❤
could you do a video on sex trauma and how to approach holding and maintaining a safe space between both people in a relationship? thank you for your videos, they help me to understand things so much.
Hi Steph! This is the first video I've watched of yours, and I wanted you to know how awesome you are. You are very well spoken and gave great insight. I appreciate your perspective. You've just gained a new follower! God bless! ❤
I agree!! Totally makes sense and I think Zack figured out nearly right away he fucked up. He didn’t know though!! It also made sense since he seemed to feel like he had more in common with Irina or could relate more plus.. why not take the easier road family wise and such? Bliss was a little too honest I think. The second she said nobody would ever be good enough he ran. I don’t see it that way I see it as.. a very protective father that would eventually come around for the right guy. I’m so so glad they got a second chance because I had a good feeling they’d work out tbh. He was worried Bliss would become his worst nightmare for his insecurities (money, not belonging, etc) but she ended up being the one!! So happy for them.
Can you do a video about learning to trust your judgement after being deceived for a long time (5+ years). Tools to open your heart and be confident about it after that kind of experience?
Wow, I really love the tv/movie breakdowns, I've learned alot and you've provided tools to handle these issues effectively. Other topics - 1. How to deal with a family that keeps turning a blind eye to toxic behavior in spouses/partners, 2. When to cut off family and not look back 3. Dealing with problematic office behavior at the upper management level
I was surprised with how many people in the experiment didnt have any screen time or even introduced in the show. I lived the guy who was so excited about pauls pants They must have just been too boring for tv ? Not as juicy i guess. Still, id be interested in watching all couples and their time in the experiment Also, that song is adorable
Bliss is the definition of class and elegance ♡ Irina is not a good person, in my opinion. I kinda delt like Irina told Zack that the other women were put off by his comments so he would think no one else was interested in him.
You should do personal stories where you advise people. For example people send you a their personal stories and you give them your opinion on the situation💕
I thought Irina was nice at first but after seeing her and her bff be mean girls it changed my mind. Yess I believe that Zach chose Irina bc he was afraid of Bliss’s family rejecting him. He was very sensitive about that and being accepted so I agree that’s why he chose Irina. But it’s good he chose her so he could see how great Bliss the one for him in the end.
not defending irina’s actions but it’s not as simple as “just leave the show if you don’t wanna be with him.” you get fined $50k if you leave before the producers say you’re allowed to. irina said she told the producers she wanted to leave after the reveal, but they told her to stick it out and go to mexico
@@terickastidbits2342 that’s exactly why i said “not defending irina’s actions” lol. my comment was in response to steph being confused about why someone wouldn’t just leave immediately when they wanna be done
@@Cornflower20 yeah the behind the scenes of the show is super sketchy. i’m not sure if it’s changed recently but the season 2 contestants came forward about how they were paid less than minimum wage, were sleep deprived, had restricted access to food but an endless supply of alcohol (obviously to make more drama happen). also shows like the bachelor have therapists/counselors on set but love is blind doesn’t. danielle from season 2 was begging the producers to leave bc she was having constant panic attacks and told them about her history of suicidal thoughts, but was given no support. the married couples are also contractually obligated to stay married until the show airs, which is usually a year later. hopefully seasons 3 and 4 were better working conditions but i’m not sure bc all this info got exposed pretty recently
I don’t know if you’ll ever see this comment and I never post on videos but just in case I wanted to say that you’re doing an awesome job! I wonder sometimes based on your words if it is disappointing that these love is blind videos are so popular when you have so much other content. From my perspective at least, the reason these are so popular is because it may be hard for the general public to relate to all of the videos such as the ones made for people who want to be a counselor, and those videos are awesome! I feel like these videos are a way of seeing through your eyes in a way that we can relate to you. The way you break down interactions is just *chef’s kiss* and you are extremely talented in the way that you relay your perspective to us. I think many if not most people are very curious about other’s behaviors and since we “know” these people too we can see the perspective of a counselor. It’s a great way to talk about mental health to the general public. I also love your content on personality disorders. Can’t wait to see more from you!
Have you heard the takes that Zach, Paul, and Bliss may be neurodivergent. That might make sense of some of the critiques around his interrupting follks in convos and why Bliss also was matter-of-fact about her opinion on Irina in the pods.
This was an excellent analysis as always! You brought to light many great connections that well rounded the entirety of each relationship. I would love to here about Ginny and Georgia as far as Series… outside of series I’d love to hear about dealing with narcissistic parents, especially covert ones.
This is such a simpy excuse huh? Grown people know how to take any work habits off outside of work. Besides that in court you cannot just interrupt whenever you want. There are rules you follow there too.
