Cool, GOOEY FUDGY BROWNIES 1 cup (227g) butter, to be browned 1 cup (90g) Dutch-process cocoa powder 4oz (113g) dark or semisweet (60% cacao) chocolate, finely chopped 1 tsp instant espresso (or 1 Tbsp instant coffee) 1.5 cups (300g) white sugar 1/2 cup (100g) brown sugar 1 Tbsp vanilla 4 eggs 1 cup (120g) flour 1 tsp coarse kosher salt optional: 1 cup additional chopped chocolate or chocolate chips, or 1-2 cups chopped walnuts, dried cherries, etc. Preheat oven to 350°. Line 9x13” pan with foil or parchment paper with overhangs for easy removal. Put cocoa powder, chopped chocolate, and espresso powder in a heat-proof bowl. Make brown butter: Melt butter in a light-colored saucepan over medium-low heat. Once foaming and spitting, stir and scrape bottom with a spatula every 10-15 seconds. Grainy white milk solids will begin to appear on the bottom. Continue for 5-10 minutes (go by senses, not time). When foam clears and spitting noises go silent, watch closely: The milk solids will toast in seconds. As soon as the solids turn brown and smell nutty, remove pan from heat so it doesn’t burn. Immediately pour hot brown butter into prepared bowl, to bloom cocoa and melt chocolate. Stir until smooth. Set aside to cool. With a stand or hand mixer, whip sugars, vanilla, and eggs on medium-high until thick, smooth, fluffy, and lightened in color. For very moist, rich brownies, stop after 4-5 minutes. For slightly more height and fluff, whip 8-10 minutes until very thick and pale. (I did the lower end of the spectrum, 4-5 minutes-I’d recommend starting there.) Reduce speed to low. Slowly pour chocolate-butter mixture into egg foam mixture until incorporated. Using a spatula, fold in flour and salt until just incorporated. Fold in additional chocolate if using. Batter will be very thick. Scoop and spread batter evenly into prepared pan. Bake 25 minutes until surface is glossy and just set (not jiggly in center). Do not overbake. They will finish cooking as they cool. Let cool at least 30 minutes before removing from pan to slice. NOTES White sugar + foaming eggs = fudgy centers with classic glossy, crackly tops. The thicker your egg foam, the glossier/cracklier your top crust. Brown butter deepens flavor and evaporates excess water in the butter. If you don’t want to brown the butter, melt it in a saucepan with the chopped chocolate, stirring until smooth. Pour over cocoa powder and espresso powder. Stir until smooth. For extra thick brownies, use 8x8” pan. Bake time will be a bit longer.
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The Funniest Thing. A tiny ant wearing oversized sunglasses and a top hat, riding a miniature unicycle while juggling microscopic watermelons! But wait, there's more! The ant is balancing on a tightrope made of dental floss stretched between two toothpicks, while a minuscule mariachi band plays "La Cucaracha" on instruments made from paperclips and rubber bands. And if you look really closely, you'll see a microscopic flea conducting the band with a toothpick baton! But that's not all, folks! As you zoom in even further, you'll notice a subatomic circus unfolding! Electrons are performing death-defying acrobatics around the nucleus, while protons and neutrons engage in a heated game of quantum twister. In the background, a group of quarks are attempting to form a barbershop quartet, but they keep changing their flavors mid-song! Zooming out a bit, you'll spot a dust mite wearing a tiny spacesuit, planning its first lunar mission to a nearby dust bunny. The mission control center is staffed entirely by tardigrades wearing headsets made from split peas. And just when you think it can't get any funnier, you notice a microscopic comedy club where water bears are performing stand-up routines about the perils of dehydration to an audience of amused bacteria. The club's bouncer? A stern-looking paramecium with a tiny "No Cell Division" sign. Finally, in the corner of this minuscule madness, there's a support group for lonely electrons, all sharing their feelings about being negative all the time while a compassionate photon tries to lighten the mood!
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