Things we’re unlearning: Beliefs and habits that gotta go!🚪 - Ep 88 

Hi inbetweeners, thank you for always supporting our content! We see you! We do! Unfortunately, Chris Njeri’s episode couldn’t air when scheduled due to unforeseen circumstances. But it’s airing next month. So sorry for the delay.

Funny you should mention the kids thing. My husband and I have been happily married 7 years now. No kids and it's out of choice. A huge part of the community around us don't believe that people can just be staring at each other for 7 years and not want kids. But well, that's our truth. We agreed that when we are ready, we would have them. And somehow, the contraceptives have cooperated 😅😅

I want a friend like Lydia The way she always affirms Murugi 😍😍😍😍

I am unlearning that i must pay black tax. After moving abroad my mentality switched, i actually dnt have to pay black tax.i believe in the crashing airplane tutorial, i have to look out for me first before i can look after anyone else. Nowdays mimi ni bwana sina pesa.

Hey ladies, I love you two.. Especially yummy mummy.. but ladies I prefer the firm ‘it’s definitely TMI’ instead of the singing. The firm one give’s strength.

the colors of your outfits today are giving 'happy' 😍🤩

When are we watching the episode with Chris Makena??? Been refreshing here nikama nasaka mihadarati bana.

This has to be one of my favourite episodes. So much to learn and unlearn . Thank you TMI ❤.

Can’t wait for part 2. So insightful!

Empathize but don't carry 😊 I learnt 💞

Premium content. Thank you for being so raw and authentic.

That Bible talk by murugi... totally endorse it.👏

Actually, the bible does not say don't have earrings. God himself told Israeli women to get jewelery from their Egyptian Masters. The tattoo one was "don't mark yourself on account of the dead" People judge the bible based misinterpreted versions 😮 Jesus said mosaic law can be superceded by grace and this was why the Galatian churc, which was being too formalistic, was asked, "Who bewitched you?" Also, yes, the bible can be taken in context.

LOVE IS GIVING YOUR BEST! For God so loved the world that he gave his only son... If they say they love you & are not giving you their best, IT'S A SCAM!!!

This episode! Just! I have no words. Thank you for this one.

Please put a TMI live experience in November so that I can atleast attend when I come to Kenya to visit my family 😁

Pllllleeeeaassseee do an episode on FRIENDSHIP BREAKUPS

People who haven't subscribed changamkeni.

Gai Murugi preach that part on the Bible needs it’s own session …we pick and choose what we want the Bible is a buffet pick what you want 😭😭😭

Love is not enough that got straight to me. I never learned that got to learn that later in life. Toxic relationship i can get closure on my on own very true ❤❤❤

Gang gang,we love you♥️♥️

What i have been waiting for my week to start ❤❤

Wow, this is beautiful ?. So Murugi said that if someone loves you, they should make an effort to wash the dishes. Spanner in the works... if you love them, wouldn't you make an effort to accept the dirty dishes 😂😂😂. I am about to give 20 comments, this is a great show..

Ladies...thank you❤

Love needs peace

Amazing content so mature and alot to learn and think about 💯💯you ladies are gorgeous ❤️❤️

Amazing conversation. You both look gorgeous in your face beat❤❤❤

Loved the topic, however i felt like Lydia talked way too much on this episode and to some point didn't give Murugi enough airtime to air her opinion especially on the point of 'love is enough '

love your makeup, who did your makeup?

Njoroge is always chilling,, then boom 😂😂

wow lydia. You are pretty! can you keep those braids for the rest of the year? lol!

What happened to the LGBTQ episode 😌

Couldn't miss Murugis' iPhone at the begging 🎉🎉🎉🎉🎉

❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️

I love your hair Joan❤,, I love you guys❤❤❤❤❤

For someone who really “loves her church” y’all really bashed Christianity..wuuehh!😅😅

I feel like millennials learned love should have struggles and hardships for it to be true from the telemundos😂😂

One lesson I've unlearned is that..I don't have to carry all my family's weight on my shoulders😢..I know sometimes I do have the capacity but they will never experience it, especially my parents since they are soo distant like together but then again not together, bruv, I know I don't have to pick sides ..I love them both and whatever happened between them is between them,, my work is just to support and love them individually. Love this TMI talk❤

Just here to say that Dr. Obwaka didn't lie. True Love is really enough. Goes back to the discussion what is love? Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. 5 It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. 6 Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. 7 It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres. Love never fails. So going back to that example of the guy who loved going out, that was self seeking and he was not protective of his partners interest or marriage hence one can conclude from the biblical description that wasn't true love.

Why does it have to be Us against the world? Why not Us in the World? I felt that to my core!!!

I think it’s very important to get to know the Lord personally and one of the ways of doing that is by reading the bible. So we should always be careful not to justify our lifestyles based on feelings or worldly wokeness when we actually have a Bible that is very clear on all matters. Discernment and revelation can help us navigate much easier.

Things i am unlearning: We all need to have figured our lives, goals and passions out by a certain age_ not everyone figures this out early or at all. Life is a journey not a destination. You have to like your family. You are not normal if you set boundaries with some or minimize contact with some_ blood does not make connection especially if you are left feeling mentally drained after interactions with some people. Being too nice is ideal_ it is better to be kind than nice, being nice gets you used. Being too serious and ' mature'_ i am learning to bring that childlike joy and zest for life. its good for my mental health.

😂 Us against the world. Seriously WHY are we against the world

The unlearning friendship piece hit me like a ton! I’ve always thought that it’s the one ship that should last forever especially the ones you have called “best” or closest friends. The ones you knew in your heart like it’s a forever thing. Letting go and realizing they served you and you them, during that season was merely a chapter (even if it was decades of friendship) I most certainly unlearned this just last year! Grateful to hear y’all talk about it! 🙏🏾

Omg,what did I just watch?. How would somebody speak such insightful information?I've learnt so much from these two babes and I can't get enough of you .been binge watching for quite sometimes now and still will .I wish I knew this channel back when I was in campus I could have skipped all the common unit classes and attended the classes I'm having here now💜..it's worth one's time and much more..I cannot wait for part 2...and Lydia thanks for the disclaimer towards the end,we can't know everything but we're here to learn I'm coming back with all my friends subscribed🤗,,💜💜💜💜💜 Beautiful insight here

Murugi, you contradict yourself in saying you are unlearning to accept the Bible as an end all be all then proceed to explain how different churches and people in general (including yourself based on the Biblical examples you've given) misinterpret the Bible. So if the Bible says one thing, and people take it out of context and choose to follow one thing and leave the other, is it the Bible that is the issue or the people?🙃 The fact is he Bible IS God's truth. And the only truth that matters. He does not contradict Himself, for He is perfect. Meaning everything He says is as perfect as He is. Psalm 14:3 says, "They have all turned aside; together they have become corrupt; there is none who does good, not even one." Romans 3:23 "for all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God." We are all sinners. To God, there is no distinction ati small sin or big sin. If we cannot keep all, let alone one of His commandments perfectly, we fall short of His perfect standard. None of us are capable of doing that, and so judgment awaits us all. And God is just, He must punish all sin. "For the wages of sin is death, but the free gift of God is eternal life in Christ Jesus our Lord." Romans 6:23 But God is also merciful. Instead of you dying in your sin and (rightfully so) spending eternity in hell, He graciously gave us Jesus Christ, His only Son, to die on the cross for our sins. " Romans 5: 8 " but God shows His love for us in that while we were still sinners, Christ died for us." Jesus came on earth and lived a perfect and holy life. He not once broke any of God's commandments and was perfectly obedient to His Father. He also died on the cross to pay for your penalty of sins and rose from the dead for your justification (that is God regarding you as though you have never sinned.) See, Christ here is your substitute. He kept all the commandments perfectly, for your sake, and died in YOUR place. So, at the cross, there was an exchange. He took away all your sins, that is, past, present, and future. And gives you His righteousness(God's goodness) But you must repent of your sin, that is, to turn away from it and forsake it. If God didn't spare His Own Son on the cross how much more you who refuse to repent and believe in Jesus? John 3:18 says, " Whoever believes in Him is not condemned, but whoever does not believe is condemned already, because He has not believed in the name of the only Son of God." You must agree with God that you are wrong and He is right. There is only one way to make peace with God and to go to heaven. And that is through Jesus Christ. No one is going there by their good works or on any other grounds. Ephesians 2:8, "For by grace you have been saved through faith. And this is not your own doing; it is the gift of God, not a result of works, so that no one may boast." I Corinthians 1:13-14, " And we impart this in words not taught by human wisdom but taught by the Spirit, interpreting spiritual truths to those who are spiritual. The natural person does not accept the things of the Spirit of God, for they are folly to him, and he is not able to understand them because they are spiritually discerned." Ask God for His Spirit so that He may open your eyes, ears and heart to see, hear, and understand His word. I pray that you believe in the name of Jesus. Acts 4:12, "And there is salvation in no one else, for there is no other name under heaven given among men by which we must be saved."

TMI ❤️. That bit of our parents has been on my subconscious lately especially from the fact that I felt bad growing up seeing my mum love her biological children and treat me alittle different. Now grown, I know she tried her best and she just didn't know how. Coz definitely now I understand how she tried to treat me as one of her own but it can never match. I still love her for being a mum to me. Dad tried. He wasn't thaat obvious that he is biased. . Love and light❤️

Haaiiyaa today you decided to step into the fire! I totally agree with Lydia, Kenya is honestly NOT a Christian country. I don’t know where people get that idea, if it was it would be a theocracy. Last I checked, it’s not; this is why the Muslims and Hindu are able to live in Kenya in peace. I think how so many Kenyans think about religion is so limited and scares me to raise my own children as well because people are not as open as other parts of the world to new ideas especially those that challenge the status quo. Great episode as usual!! Great convo

Am unlearning people please. I have a tendency to bend over backwards so as not to inconvenience others.

TMI is officially my weekly therapy session 😪😪 I love you guys. Empathise but don't carry - new motto 😪

On the part where Murugi said loves needs to be peaceful I could 1000% relate...the moment I met the love of my life it's been peace all through ♥️ And I met him at the point where I didn't want to settle anymore

Guys, i love you so much, i love your wisdom, I love your authenticity. May we continue to unlearn and apply what we know for sure! lots of love from my Namibia! You are my online friends!

I met Murugi over the weekend and we for sure chatted like Queenbetweeners. Wonderful authentic soul she is. Looking forward to meet Lyd

First to watch and comment ❤❤❤❤❤❤

I have been unlearning a false sense of responsibility ''empathize but do not carry.'' The Bible has no issue, the society is what has an issue. Principles do not change. The issue of heaven and hell and salvation is all about accepting Jesus as our savior and then repenting and sinning no more. The time comes when you actually take that path with both feet in if that is what you are about. You definitely can not understand things you know nothing about but if you study the Bible and get more knowledge then you will make more informed decisions. Many days down the road, you will know more and then you will do what needs to be done. Salvation is a personal journey, nobody can tell you when to get into it, you will feel the conviction when the time comes.

Listening to TMI is definitely very therapeutic🥰🥰🥰. Love the way you guys articulated the point on religion/belief system; Hopefully it spreads the word and make Christians especially more open to the views of other religions cuz I feel like we were conditioned to think our religion as being "the way, the truth" whereas navigating life and being open only teaches us we are just using a way, a truth like other religions. Nice episode!! We definitely unlearning much and will raise a better generation God willingly

Hey inbetweeners I really enjoyed the episode especially the last segment about religious and spirituality and I think we should have it as a topic soon...cause there's a lot to unpack on there

With spirituality,,you are either living in sin or walking with Jesus..the in-between is just being lukewarm(read what the bible says about lukewarm believers) also listen to "soft life through christ podcast" I love it,young people talking about their journey in CHRIST.

When Murugi says, when I meet couples who are married more than 2 years without children! She goes why? I have laughed so hard because those couples are US 9 years on 😂😂😂😂 happily married !We get that alot btw 😅Mambo ni mengi lakini 😅. Funny thing people will ask my husband the question not me 😂.

😢 My best friend introduced me to your podcasts and I swear you guys are the best . As a 23 Yr old in betweener I'm learning alot of things and the pressure i had before of how life had to turn out is literally gone . I'm approaching life more differently now 😌. I'm learning how to appreciate Awino more and its all because of you big sisters ❤❤❤ . Let me take the mantle and introduce another young babe to your podcasts

I am yet to see a bible verse that says drinking alcohol is sinful, especially drinking it responsibly. As Murugi said some of these beliefs are based on cultural contexts

Not me saying "wacha kwanza niwatch hawa wasupa" everytime I'm on youtube

Hi guys ,,it’s me again watching my favorite ❤it’s definitely tmi🎉🎉🎉

I'm I the only one waiting for the episode tmi shot with Makena Njeri?

It's amazing to have these conversations of in learning habits and beliefs. Someone said that the illiterate of the 21st century are not the people that can not read or write but those that can not unlearn and re-learn things

Vile nawafuatilia kama siafu aki 😂 you're my therapist Also road to 100k

yes, its not just about having the capacity to do something ,but in a relationship, its about compromise and tying to create the space to love someone right in their love languages .

This conversation is so eye-opening. It feels like I am in therapy. Thank you, Girls ❤

The way I look forward to Wednesday because of TMI💃💃

I love you ladies.Great content.When I grow up,I want to be a great woman like Murugi❤️

The points mentioned about closure are so true. I am definitely struggling with closure!

This episode is amazing, I love how murugi talked about the issues with religion because honestly there is. If we believe government or our parents can set up rules to live by and it turns out to be for everyone's good then definitely God's rules are for everyone's good except if its being misinterpreted or invented by people to suit individual needs or goals. I honestly think you accept religion twice in your life, the one you were born into and when you truly believed and affirm its truly the one or when you choose another one because that's what you now believe is truly the one.

I had to listen to this episode with a pen and paper... too many gems on here. Hardest thing is unlearning our mental conditioning.

This episode is pure gems 🥰🫶

On the Biblical aspect, there is no ambiguity in the bible. Moreover, there is nothing new under the sun. So even with changing times and seasons, the Bible still addresses the expected mode of conduct. Also, there are fundamental things that are condemned and others encouraged across all religions. As humans, we just want to fine-tune the scriptures to our rhythm. Otherwise, everything is well spelt out.

and that's why its important to communicate your non negotiables and if the other party doesn't find them realistic, move on find what works for you rather than tying to change the person....

What does TMI stand for..??...I just love these two queens...I have really improved in verbal reasoning and communication

Hey team.. May I ask when the episode with Chris is airing?

I had put on this podcast to go on the background as I worked... But I found myself just glued to the screen cause of how relevant the conversations are... From beginning to end... So helpful and eye opening... Thank you 💜

Honestly lyd and Murugi thank you for holding such conversations. Thank you for being virtual Big sisters ❤

The conditioning that a peacefull relationship is being boring is real..we were taught to survive and thrive in chaos..peace and stability feels unfamiliar , untrue mostly like a setup😂

And the same Christians that think the other religions are not good or not the way to go their bibles says that you will be judged by your own faith Whether you are Muslim, Christian, hindu when the time comes, "if it does" you will be judged by the faith you believe in

So eye-opening. However, Lydia talks over Murugi all the time and it really is dustracting. Please let her speak and finish.

When I saw the thumbnail, I thought Lydia is gonna be alone today 😄

My best Episode🥹 You both are gifted and sure are the change we need in this generation 👏👏 You just gave me a wake up call Ding Ding 🛎️ Dong🙏

Kenya (as per the Constitution at least) has no State religion. Just a correction on Kenya having a state religion😅

Someone can love you deeply and still not wash the dishes on your schedule. Some things they can compromise but some they can just never wash the dishes when you want. And you deciding to not stress over the dishes with them is also you showing your partner grace and love.

Kenya is a secular state,we just as assume we are a christian nation because a majority of Kenyans subscribe to Christianity.

I hope it's not TMI but I would love to learn more about Lydia's mom's story

Lovely conversation with this queens here as always.Am I the only one who noticed Lyd kept interrupting Murugi when she was speaking!😟

I agree with Joan's mom on not teaching her daughters about contraceptives and sex before marriage.. it's how I was raised and it's how am raising my two daughters.. it's a Christianity teaching.. not bad in my opinion

True on the empathy and wanting to help everyone. I try to not listen with my heart but my mind🙈🙈

The friendship part hit me! This happened to me with someone I shared a room with, you can imagine the awkwardness. I've come to accept it now, it was great while it lasted but it just wasn't meant to be.

One of the fastest way to cure the "adults need to procreate" conditioning is to volunteer at/follow the work of the likes of Usikimye/Njeri Wa Migwi and see the number of kids/infants that are severely abused by their own parents. Childfree people, especially those that choose the path not because they hate kids or were severely hurt growing up but because they just have no desire to have kids, tend to be more level-headed and couple up pretty neatly, as it takes a level of introspection to reach that decision. Most importantly, the childfree hurt nobody with their decision, but a whole lot of parents bring forth life and go on to cause their own so much harm, so much hurt.

Lmfao who is this spamming every comment:(

Yeeeey ☺️ let's go!!!

Just Wondering, Does TMI stand for Too Much Information?

Mhhh I love you guys but that introduction of 'It's definitely tmi 'you are overdoing it,mnavuta sana,used to be great when you started the podcast.

Lyd u spoke to me directly in this episode ,love love u gals 🥰🥰🥰🥰

More general examples and less of me, I , My would be refreshing.