My daughter went to a sleepover and they gave them pizza for dinner. The following morning there was no breakfast (or lunch). And the host had insisted we pick our kids at 3:00 PM. My child was so hungry when I picked her up. People are so weird.
My kids never slept anywhere not even a relative. Sorry but I don’t trust anyone. Kids are welcome to stay at my house because I know what goes on in my home. I know people probably feel the same way as I do about “ I know what happens in my home” but bottom line my kids aren’t sleeping anywhere
This was me and I have boys they are grown now but people said I was doing too much…… Oh Well, I made them and couldn’t make another like them so I did what was comfortable for me NO Sleepovers EVER!! When my son was about 11 he begged to do a sleepover at his friend house across the street, put his lil friend up to ask and everything the answer was still NO ( I said it nicely of course) well why did his older sister who didn’t live there come by earlier with her baby to see her mom. Later on that night her boyfriend came by and shot at the house😳 t apparently they got into an argument earlier she didn’t even tell her mom about it just came like she was doing a regular visit.….do what you want with yours but I protected mine
As a person who was touched by a child of the same sex who overpowered me at a sleepover, it’s a HARD NO for me! My parents were very strict & as soon as they thought they could trust someone, this is what happened. My siblings and I did not act out and weren’t wild. I told my parents when I was in my early 30’s. Turns out the child had access to adult movies at the aunt’s house. My parents were so upset when they found out. It’s not their fault that I didn’t tell. In my youth, I was ashamed that I couldn’t fight the kid off.
Your reaction is normal for a victim of sexual assault. That's why imo,there should be not statue of limitations on child sexual assault... sometimes the victim is too traumatized, embarrassed and shamed...or too young to understand what's being done to them.
Tamron my daughter is 26 now but when we first relocated to Kansas from Indiana and she met a couple friends she was very sad and lonely having left family and friends back home. I did allow her to go to a sleepover after the mom called and asked could my daughter spend the night since our girls had become friends. Well the mom didn’t keep the girls that night it was the dad’s night untold to me. When the dad brought my daughter home to my husband and I he looked kinda scared. Upon questioning my girl she said he was drunk and got on the floor next to her and his daughter and had his arms around my daughter snoring. My daughter woke up her friend his daughter and the girl yelled DAD and he jumped up and ran out the room. My girl said nothing happened but she was frightened to wake to a man’s arms around her. I called him he didn’t answer so I called his ex wife who asked if my girl could spend the night. She thought it was funny said he needs to lay off the bottle and how sorry she was. I never called cops but my girl never stayed all night with anyone ever again, Period!!!
One of my best guy friends had a daughter the same age as mine. Our girls went back and forth all of the time on the weekends. Never ever was an issue until my daughter was in college. She came home for a visit when he was inappropriate with her. You just don't know. Be careful who you trust!
My kids are both over 30...never was allowed to sleep over anywhere. My kids are well-rounded and good people who can talk/get along with anyone. It's a parents' job to protect their kids...I take that very seriously.
That second lady talking makes no sense whatsoever. How will critical thinking come in to play when a child feels like they are in danger of being sexual assaulted. There isn't anyline, you can never know, vet or trust a person enough for you to say ok, your home seems ok, my child can sleep over there. Most of the times when children have been SA, at a sleepover, its often from someone they knew or were very close to. I'm with the first lady, no sleepovers
That "learn critical thinking" answer is ridiculous.. so you want your 12/13 yo in a situation where they'd have to rely on critical thinking skills?!... critical thinking skills are taught in the safety of a classroom with group and individual projects.. Not in real time life situations🙄.
The second lady's way of thinking is naive and dangerous. Children do not have a coping mechanism to defend themselves in the event of a violent situation that they may not have the ability to overcome, and in the worst-case scenario survive. As a parent, you go with your intuition and discernment and advocate for your child's safety and if that makes one as she stated "helicopter parent" then I am a proud card-carrying club member. My 12-year-old is constantly asking to do sleepovers and it's a hard automatic no, every single time. I was allowed to stay at friends' houses throughout my adolescent years, fortunately, they were all safe and enjoyable experiences with the same group of friends I have enjoyed for over 35 years. But the times and hearts of mankind have certainly changed.
@@Virgogirl45kids do have a "coping mechanism" (I took this to mean defenses mechanism) when presented with a threat. all of us do. no one has to justify being a controlling parent. ppl should just embrace it and not try to say its any thing other what a parent being controlling.
We all know what happens at these sleepovers. Ain’t happening and if they wanna sleep over they can do it virtually. I see you and you can see me through that screen
Now that I’m older I realized that the only sleepovers I had were at my cousins houses lol I never really slept at anyone else’s house until of course I went to college lol . But yes parents definitely use discernment when it comes to sleepovers.
I'm happy that my oldest sister, didn't believe in sleep over, even my parents, Or relives as well, now as a 42 year old, I believe why she did what she did for our safety. Their are predators out there, even inside your circle.❤🙏🏼🙏🏼🙏🏼
You can’t let kids sleepover at just anybody’s house. You have to know the parents well until you just let you kids stay at someone else. There are too much going on this days til where that is a no no
We never did any sleep overs when I was a kid. It wasn’t a common thing at all in my community of mostly Caribbean, Italian, Greek & Portuguese families.
My husband and I help raise our granddaughter and she had a sleepover for her birthday. I think she was 10. One of my requirements was that the parents had to come and bring their children so they could meet me and I them. One child arrived in a cab. I called the mother and asked why she didn't follow our request? She said " they go to school together! I said but you don't know us? She didn't get it!
I think you can give children independence, solve problem solving and many more growth opportunities in many other ways It isn’t a “only” sleepover type of opportunities There is no amount of Drs,therapy, or medicine that could restore a child’s innocence if it’s stolen by someone a parents trusted at a sleepover
We never had sleepovers when I was growing up and couldn’t attend sleepovers. My child could attend the party but when it was time for night night, that behind was home in my house in the bed. Sleepovers are off the table!!!
i wonder if there will be a deeper study on this. like what are the attachment styles and communication styles of these parents. i had sleepovers as a kid. my kids had them too. id love to see a study on the relationships of parenting, attachment, communication styles and this whole no sleepover decision.
I do not agree with the second Ladies’ opinion. They can grow their independence chops utilizing other methods. They have that opportunity all day while attending in person school.
At 2:45 I had to hard pause the video. Let me EXPLAIN something to you. No matter if it's 2AM, or 2PM, there's is NOBODY on God's green Earth that's going to tell Me I CANNOT PICK UP MY DAUGHTER FROM YOUR HOUSE!!
I was SA’d by a friend’s father when I slept over. Once I became an adult, it dawned on me that my friend must have endured so much while growing up. She lived with her father and brother. The mother was not in her life.
Being a divorced mom, Sleepovers were allowed but it had to be at my house. I did however meet a family with two daughters that I absolutely adored and agreed to my daughter sleeping over to their house
I had a hard rule for sleepovers, it was NO unless I know the parents. And even with knowing the parents. I had questions for example, are their older siblings? If I didn’t hang out with the parent or know them, the answer was NO!!
I felt extremely proud that the young girl that texted her mom was smart. She didn’t feel safe and she didn’t want to stay. For me I don’t trust anyone and there could be another person in that house that would do harm to a child. What I hate most is people say they know what’s going on in their house but a lot of people are shocked to find out their husbands or wives or other relatives are abusers. This is why we don’t know who the abusers are because they hide who they are.
Its hard for me to imagine sending my kids to a sleepover but as negligent as my parents were and as sketchy as some of the places I’ve been, absolutely nothing bad happened to me as a result
My parents didn’t allow me to go to sleepovers. At the time, I was so angry because I felt like I was missing out. The compromise they made was for me to stay at a friend’s house late (until maybe 10pm or 11pm), go home to sleep and go back at around 8 or 9am. Looking back, I am grateful for their protection. It doesn’t matter how long you have known a family, a parent may not always pick up on someone’s pedophilia behavior, I don’t care how many dinner parties you all attend together. There are many other ways to help kids develop independent decision making skills.
Have a mom/dad and me "day party", come over for a meal and then go home. Dr Mose is being a bit idealistic. Off topic ... When she said, "I have three children." I definitely heard the Trini twang.
Sounds like the Dr. may have had a cookie cutter type of life possibly. Maybe she never experienced any type of childhood trauma 🥴 It's a hard NO for me sorry not sorry
I let my daughter sleepover at her friend's out once after her asking over and over. We've been knowing the family since she was in the 3rd grade; she's now in the 7th grade.
I don't believe in doing sleepovers, even at relatives homes. When I slept over at a relatives house, I was violated. My mother didn't want me to spend the night but I would go over directly from school and stayed and that's how I got there. Now as an adult, if I need to sleep somewhere, I go get a hotel room.
To the lady in red, question? Can you not explore others home without sleeping over. You can learn about others at school, at a party with my your parents present, etc. Silly reason to justify sleep over. You explore while you are awake. Its not stranger who are hurting the children it people we thought we knew, broke bread with, went on vacation ok with who are the one you have tinwatxhnoit for. predators are usually nice and kind but all along they are waiting for the right opportunity. I am not saying all. But from my experience and what I observe it's that passiveness that opens the door for predatory to abuse of innocent children, right under the parents noses.
I occasionally could sleep over certain friends homes whose parents had met my parents, and vice versa. Thank GOD nothing ever happened. That said, as an adult I 1,000% understand why some parents would categorically not allow sleepovers.
I think if we’re honest, a lot of us parents don’t actively try to become close to the parents of our kids friends. That’s probably the issue. Otherwise, it would make more sense. If we don’t know the parents or what goes in the home, it’s definitely a no.
why aren't they showing his face? ugh. I'm so glad I never went to sleepovers. i got invited to my BFF sleepover when I was in elementary and my mom said no. this was the 90s.
A family friend in FL says no to sleepovers in FL cause too many guns in those houses and the parents are idiots who don't lock them up. That's just 1 example. So many dangers at a sleep over so no .
I allowed this because my parents were a hard no on the idea of me going anywhere. Big mistake! Huge! Her father was saying that I was hovering, my mother was saying that she needed experiences and to fun, and then the large age gap between my two daughters was a factor, so I agreed. The lady is still friendly today, but her daughter was just… omg Who knew!?
Even if there is trust between the families, you just never know. I’d rather my child have to get over FOMO, than sexual assault or compromising pictures. Many children never recover from that type of trauma.
There are plenty of other ways to learn independence. Since when did sleepovers become the magical gateway to independence? Hard no before the age of 16. After the age of 16 and until you go to college, if I know my child is vocal and can speak up for themselves and handle themselves, then I would - but still only in a home without a male present. Yes, women do things too, but much less likely and even if that happened, if I know my child would be able to speak up for themselves and safely remove themselves from that situation without feeling threatened or scared of “authority,” then I would be more okay with it. Kinda like my mom not letting my sister go away to college because she knew she was a follower and kind of weak-willed but had absolutely no problem with me going away. Not because she thought nothing could possibly happen to me, but because she knew that I spoke up for myself unapologetically, had boundaries and that I would handle myself properly in whatever a situation called for.
Lots of problems with this story. You don’t check under their nose with your finger to see if they are asleep. That’s checking if they are DEAD. And if he just wanted to get some sleep, & for the girls to get some rest, why was he up checking on them if the girls were quiet???
DIDDY HAD SLEEP OVERS WITH JUSTIN BEIBER, USHER, CHRIS BROWN, AND OTHER YOUNG ARTIST. ALL THESE ARTIST ARE SUCCESSFUL SO MAYBE SLEEP OVERS ARE GREAT!!! NOT ALL PARENTS ARE BAD 😂😂😂😂
