You are correct. Thriving as a solo retiree takes effort. But the effort is worth it. Building a community takes time. Since I retired 6 months ago, I have a small community thru church. Seems like 2 lunches out a week. My exercise is walking my dog. Television is on in the evening. For the next nine months doing travel. Once my travel is done, will be volunteering at a food back. I think making future plans works best for me. I have one cruise coming up and then 4 trips through March 2025. I can spend time researching the places I am going. I enjoy all the suggestions you two offer,
I’ve camped at 5 different state parks in Michigan this summer alone and I am loving it! People that are sitting around lonely were like that before their spouse died not because of it. I was independent before, during and after marriage.
I live alone by choice. I LIKE the ability to choose what to do, when to do it, where, why, and how - without feeling the pressure of running my choice by someone else for approval/ agreement. No one needs anyone else's approval to do what you WANT to do. I have many hobbies/interests to indulge in - fiction writing, sewing, knitting, weaving, beading - and every day I choose a different one of those to do. My children are grown with lives of their own, and we all keep each other up to date with our lives, but they know I am perfectly capable of amusing myself. We all have different interests and that makes our visits and phone calls really entertaining!
I'm single and am approaching retirement. I am FAR from lonely. Please don't assume all single people are lonely. That's not the truth. People do NOT need a spouse to be fulfilled.
Widowed, living alone, retired from a high powered job. I am far from Linley, I go out everyday unless the weather is not fit to drive. I have friends and people I enjoy to spend time with but I also have things I enjoy doing on my own. I love my own home and like my own company, I also love the peace and quiet of being on my own. I make my own choices do what I want and have built a life that makes me happy. As far as t.v. I do watch t.v. some days but on other days I find there are many more things I want to do. I think loneliness is a frame of mind. I plan my week on a Sunday, this includes meal planning, shopping list, paying bills, doing my weekly accounts. Over the last week in the month I plan the next month. Do my budget , fill in my appointments then plan the following week around this. In retirement or before retirement your life is what you make it. If you are of a mind to mope about and feel sorry for your self you will be bored and lonely no matter what stage of your life you are at.
When my father in law died I asked my wife if her mother would want to live with us. She was ok with the money side of things but her whole life was her husband and her family. We had 2in college, one in high school so we had plenty of room, She loved living with us, having kids around and going to high school events.
I have a gratitude journal and I write down 3 things every day that I am grateful for. No matter how hard my life has been and it’s been horrid lately I always managed to find 3 things even if they are small
Hey, I weave baskets!!..don't knock the craft..its a dying craft. Some types of baskets are only taught among tribes or cultures. This is what was used BEFORE plastic grocery bags
I lived in Mexico for a few years. Basket weaving is a primary income source in several Latin American countries - except where foreign companies have undercut their prices.
You both are so kind, I appreciate your caring. I’ve been solo for 30 years, and I would agree the work routine is huge. I announced my retirement for the end of 2023, and I’m giving myself the grace of time now to rekindle the hobbies and add in more exercise now, so I’m ready to expand when I have those 40 hours to fill. Building up friendships will be a goal, as will exploring volunteering. Instead of watching television, I listen to podcasts and RU-vid to inspire and keep my mind curious. Thanks for what you do. 🙏👍💗
I'm 77 and my hobby is learning to play piano. I lost my husband 10 years after retiring and don't mind living alone but find that as time goes on, I'm feeling a little useless yet I don't want to be committed to a lot. I do have so much I need to do that I let go when I was working and then taking care of my husband for many years. I find that when I try to get rid of clutter, before I can finish one room, it needs to be done again and I never get anywhere. I simply can't go nonstop at anything and just keeping the normal routine done doesn't leave much time for extra decluttering. That depresses me and I don't want to do anything.
Thank you. You really are doing a good thing talking about this. Boredom is absolutely the number one struggle in retirement. It really isn’t spoken much about but needs to be.
Alone doesn’t equal Lonely. I have lady friends who are much more lonely in their marriages than I am as a now single person. You will always feel lonely if you don’t become your own bestie ❤
I have enjoyed several of your videos but some I can't relate to. My main income is social security, I do have a couple other sources, between the two I probably get about a couple thousand a month and I still have a mortgage and a credit card bill so I have very little disposable income. It's not unusual for me to run out of money before the end of the month and have to call on my son or my credit card for help. I worked in factories half my working career and the local radio station for the other half. So talking about investments and traveling etc is pretty foreign to me. I never made more than 25k a year my entire work life. So no 401k or savings. And with my arthritis I can't work anymore. It's why I had to retire at 62. But the other advice you've been giving has been very helpful. :)
4:51 if you’re getting up at 7:30 every morning, maybe think about calling people at a more reasonable hour? At least, make sure it fits in with their schedule.
You’re very welcome! ❤️ We are glad you found the ideas helpful. If you ever need more tips or just want to chat, feel free to reach out. Wishing you all the best! 😊🌟
Good question! We met through work about 16 years ago. We have been married for 14. Worked hard at blending our families and it has paid off for all of us. We always put the kids first, and still do. Thank you for asking.
Thank you for the tips. I've watched several of your videos and sometimes feel like I can't relate (eg. accountability partner). But this one clicked with me. :)
I'm in my mid seventies and have lived alone for 20 years. I live in a fairly remote area and sometimes don't see another person for weeks. I absolutely love my retirement loneliness is a sign of an idle mind. I've had major surgery twice including cancer in the last 2 year and dealt with alone. At one point I thought I was going to die and was fine with it. Its nature. I find routine and planning is the last thing I need. I wake up say to myself I'm over 70 and I'm going to die soon. How am I going to have a good day today?
Your perspective is truly unique and inspiring. It’s incredible how you’ve embraced life on your own terms and found joy and contentment in your solitude. Your resilience and positive outlook, even in the face of challenges, are admirable. Wishing you many more good days filled with whatever brings you peace and happiness! 🌄😊
I have found out here recently that I am really good at writing stories. That is my hobby. I even have a book out know. If you're curious what it is called, is Why Us
I know you mean well, but your bias is showing. People who are single/solo have already established community and strong relationships and are not typically "lonely". You talk as if during the working years single people had nothing but their careers and are suddenly left adrift. Far from it. I think you have a misunderstanding of single people. The majority of couples have not worked to establish strong relationships outside of their marriage. It is the partnered people who will definitely be single in the future who will struggle. I think you could alter your language just a bit and make this a useful podcast without perpetuating the myth that solo people are lacking. In the words of solo researcher Bella Paola, "married people have "the one" and single people have "the ones". Half of your tips are just tips for anybody. Shouldn't everyone in retirement exercise. Shouldn't everyone benefit from volunteering, not just single people. Please stop being so condescending to solo people all of the stats on single people are so different than the stereotypes and our culture seems to think coupled people are somehow the fortunate ones and those "poor single people" need help.
Thank you so much for leaving this message. You are right, we do not know what it is like being single. We produce these specific “solo retirees” as a result of people asking for more. We certainly don’t want to sound biased, we apologize for that. We have several successful “solo retiree” clients who are thriving. Yet again there are some who are lost and don’t know how to do many of the things we talked about in this video. Thank you again for leaving this comment
I agree with you Michelle - like you I am single/solo and have tons of things to keep me busy. I walk daily, visit the library, listen and read books, volunteer and have a close circle of friends. My life is filled and fun. I would never use the term lonely when I describe me or my circumstances. I did like the idea of doing one new thing a week (even if I could only commit to 4 weeks) as a personal challenge.
I totally agree with you. I think people who have been married forever have no clue how to be alone or what to do. Single people have had lots more experience with this and are genuinely happier. I think they need to do a video on that but I know they mean well.
