That start off with the authors of novels, then we have dramas with those behaviors. I'm a reader of Chinese and Korean novels, I read lot of stories where the FL is abused even sexually by the ML but still love him. Even if appear another man that treats her well, still get back with the ML because at the end he changes of attitude. It is disgusting. I keep reading for other situations that happen in the stories and I like to see how they are solved. But is truly sad to read hundred chapters of misunderstandings and abuse.
I like those stories cause they show personal improvement, generally people behave that way because of a trauma or a parent issue so they are not like that and it makes it more realistic cause real people have real problems and frustration, make mistakes… I’m not saying that I support violence but…
I thought I was the only one who found those things toxic...... Normally when these things shown in drama people thinks it's romantic & don't understand those things aren't normal at all rather toxic
I realize that they're toxic but I can overlook it (to a certain extent) since it's just fiction or when it makes sense in the time period (not that it makes it okay☹️)
The worst part is most of these dramas have a second male lead who is lovely and only has green flags. But female lead still chooses the toxic lead. This is really going to confuse young girls into what should be acceptable in relationships.
I have watched boys over flowers and true beauty i agreed that boys over flowers main lead was very toxic and red carpet but in true beauty both ML and SmL were green flag for female lead
At this point i think it is some kind of conspiracy to lower divorce rate or something, to brainwash women into staying at bad relationships and think that is love! I always go for sml!
I saw one with a toxic ex-husband throws her most valued possession a Jade pendant into a fucking fish pond and the second male lead Who is a freaking CEO in a $1,000 suit goes into the pond for her and gets it and she freaking chose the ex-husband And trust me that wet boy made Mr Darcy seam bland
Finally someone pointed out things that are wrong in korean dramas... I have stopped watching Korean dramas because of this.... Abusive behaviors, over showing-off, toxic behaviors shown in job places and other places... I am sick of it!!
I have watched many kdramas since 2015 to 2018, i still watch some hyped dramas... But if leads have healthy relationships, the other environments shown in drama feel toxic. And that also brings out their toxic social culture.. I don't want to fill my head with those anymore.
@@aariachaudhary6143 did you watch lee jong suk's movie "vip" and kim soo hyun's movie "real"? Also i couldn't take kim soo hyun's drama it's ok not to be ok bcz of female leads excess rude behavior... Dropped that in 1st two episodes... Not my thing.
Out of all the dramas shown in the video, I have only watched Boys over Flowers. And Jun-Pyo really takes the cake in being abusive- case in point the scenes included in the video. Regardless, I loved the video especially the part where males can be victim too. For this you can also include scenes between Kim Tan and Rachel (The Heirs). Another toxic relationship in Boys over Flowers was that of Jun pyo and Jae Kyung.
Lol... yes almost all the early 2000's classic dramas glorify abuse as being acceptable if the abuser is hot, rich and magically changes because of love. And then there is the Second ML that is also hot but because he is nice, respectful and genuinely cares for the FL, for some reason he ends up lonely and broken-hearted.
The boys over flowers wasnt my favorite becuase of all thetoxicisity. Their are other versions which I did like. But the Korean version was more abusive.
@@goodfriend2603 ikr, i didn't watch the drama but I've seen a lot of people pointing it as a best drama and they think that two men fighting over em and literally coercing em into romance is CUTE?
Yeah though I did think the others were still abusive one ver. Kinda just added more plot to show that the ml is becoming good. I dont remember wh9ch one because I watched from long time ago but yeah I just remember one version just a lot more good parts. Idk how to explain but like better plot for the ml and fl.
What I like to add is this is all presented in all the popular dramas, young naive can't differentiate between these emotional thin lines, and find it cute... it's so sad that it's presented wrongly
In the Netflix series Maid, one of the characters says “first they hit around you then they hit you” when talking about domestic abuse. I’ve seen it a lot in kdramas, where they hit or break objects around the female character, and we are led to believe that it’s “not that bad” because she’s not getting hurt. But through that series I realized it’s really toxic
Thank you for putting "It's okay not to be okay", although it is one of my favorites FL the protagonist had an awful behaviour towards the guy she said she loved, I had no idea when and how his feeings turned from irritation and fear to love and affection
Finally i can openly say that I DROPPED BOYS OVER FLOWERS AFTER THE FIRST 2 EPISODES, god it was too damn hard seeing such an abusive character and it was even harder to know that he is going to end up with the female lead, like wtf, if a boy ever treats me like that i'mma report him to the police.
Finally someone same as me all my friends are like why didn't you watched boys over flowers such an iconic drama and all but I just can't see these kinds of toxic dramas 🤷♀️
Yes 👏 same here. Many claim it to be a classic and I went to go see it but did not continue at all. I couldn't stand the guy. He was so abusive and it gross me out and never watch it
I appreciate that you added "It's okay to be not okay". Though the title & her mental condition, their relationship it's understandable but irl without such a Female shouldn't be like that toxic too ...
Exactly! I started watching it because of Kim Hyun Joong. And his character always treated her with respect and care. Yet she chose the guy who physically, emotionally, and verbally abused her. He also got others to do it too. Yet the comments were full of females saying how much they loved him and they wished they were her. They said it was ok because deep down he loved her and changed for her in the end. How can ANY female think that kind of behavior is acceptable and wish they had a guy like that?
Upon watching Extraordinary Attorney Woo and Hospital Playlists, it made me realized that so far, with all the characters I've watched ino her K-dramas. Jun-ho and ik-jun are the only characters that shows a man who didn't have to force someone, who respects someone's space, and is patient enough to understand the person he loves. If you have anymore K-dramas suggestion where it involves green flag guys & women, I highly appreciate it! ✊♥️
I find even more toxic that in ALL stories the girl falls in love with the abusive guy instead of the guy who always treated them nicely and respected them.
Yes, I agree on that..I only like/watch kdrama with healthy relationships You should try watching 'My demon'.Jeong gu won is the ML.He's a evergreen forest..!
At first I thought it was romantic then my husband watched part of a kdrama with me and completely lost his shit (not at me but what playing out). I was so confused asked him what’s wrong. He said if he had acted exactly like that character when we first started dating would we be married right now. My answer was no because that’s abuse and I would have dumped his ass immediately.
This needs to go viral! Some of these dramas I stopped watching because of the obvious toxic abuse being normalized within relationships. I love Kdramas, and they can be made better!
I was in toxic relationship he used to threat me , abuse me but thankfully everything ended with help of my friends now m in healthy relation ship with my bestfrnd 😅 and because he know everything he is more careful towards my sensitive mind
I appreciate so much that you took the time to make this edit showing the toxic behaviors that exist in kdramas and the message you gave about a toxic relationship, this definitely deserves more recognition
DRAMAS USED - Law School Extraordinary You Boys Over Flowers True Beauty Was It Love? Another Oh Hae Young It's Ok Not To Be Ok Uncontrollably Fond Crash Landing On you Fight For My Way Oh My Baby Tempted
Run on Extraordinary you When my love blooms When the Camelia blooms Business proposal Are good example . Only heartwarming and slow Burn romance with tint of comedy nothing abuse.
So great to point out that the media often noraluzes and even sometimes glorifies unacceptable behavior in romantic (and sometimes work) relationships. Possessiveness, violence, cruelty, ad the other traits you pointed out have n no place in a healthy relationship and I hope to see it less in future dramas. Extraordinary Attorney Woo is a great example of a totally sweet romantic partner who is all about supporting and uplifting his lady and CLOY is another one where the male lead's main goal always seems to be to go out of his way to care for the female lead even before he is interested in her romantically.
Woah it's amazing. I'm not into kdramas that's why I'm very late to this edit. Some people out there thinking jealous, possessiveness are romantic things god everytime it's irritating me to the core. One of the best edit🤗🤗👏👏👏
Jealous is fine. But if it's turn into abusive, violence, manipulating and all those toxic behavior; it's not fine. It's mean they have trust issue. This why I don't like boys before flowers
@@lullabyandtales904 first of all jealous is a trust issue. You have to believe your partner first right. I never seen these kdramas. kdrama i ever watch is nine tailed fox, ghost doctor.
You don't know how important this video is. A lot of people think most of these actions are attractive, not knowing it's actually abuse. Abuse has no gender, both men and women can be victims. Never be too afraid too ask for help. You can think you love the taste of poison, but it doesn't mean it's good for you. Matter of fact you'll be thankfull to your self for seeking help.
TBF, that scene in Something in the Rain, Jung Hae In is actually correct, but he's so angry he's not communicating it well. The FL ISN'T clear about not wanting her ex to her parents - but she's very clear with the ex. She basically gets trapped in the situation where she has to have dinner with them at her parents house, but she doesn't stand up for herself and leave. Jung Hae In is frustrated because she keeps waffling on their relationship (since he is younger and was basically her dongsaeng when they were growing up). That relationship is NOT toxic and they resolve that fight. Fights can happen. What's important is realizing the harm you cause another person and apologizing and working it out, which he does. But for the purposes of the video, it fits out of context. This is really well done! There is certainly a lot of toxicity in all sorts of movies and series. The important thing is that it isn't treated as normal or mainstream. Viewer discretion should definitely be advised for all of these series.
Back then I used to like watching this kind of relationship where the male leads became possessive and overly jealous..but now, I understand how toxic all of the scene so it's really feel disturbing right now 😢
Thanks for adding it's okay to be not okay or else everything abusive toward male lead was brush under carpet by audience try to prove female lead badass. Imagine role reverse, and a male always invaded female personal space, embarassing her in public , make her uncomfortable with horny talks....it was considered as assualt but most of the audience find it funny since it was happening with male lead.
Fr! I also remember one scene where Moonyoung touch Gangtae when he was changing! If it was reverse roles I'm sure the ml would be put on jail right away. That's why i dropped that drama 😫
RU-vid really needs to put this video on everyone's home page....cause some people really believe all these stuff are romantic but in reality they only cause fear and trauma for the victims......too all the people who will become scriptwriters for the next generation shows please do not romanticism toxic relationships
Yes. One one video a girl said the relationship in Boys Over Flowers is fine even if he was like that in the beginning …I told her that is a drama and in real life many girls end up dead by dating abusive men like that…
Appreciate it so much that u took ur time to talk about smth like this. Kdramas being really popular these days and many young girls watch them that might brainwash them to think 'being aggressive' in love is romantic. Time to call toxicity out!
People who get into these type of relationships don't look for romanticism but emotional intensity. It tends to be a very transformational power in them for good or for bad.
Yup...yup..I just enjoy the intensity. Like watching horror or thriller movies. That's it. I do appreciate straightforward, healthy romance dramas, but sometimes I watch these kind of dramas just for the ride.
I didnt watch boys over flowers well but I saw some clips well those were LMH's decent clips I too liked his character . I was very young at that time . I liked that drama with Joy too I enjoyed that concept of making bad guy a good guy.But now I understand this is toxic, any girl should not be treated like that. I dont like toxic leads now. There are many annoying toxic female leadstoo in nowadays dramas
Yeah guys can be victims..and yeah glad you show this side of their "badump" relationship... Why they always end up together will never know.... I love the saying "it's not your job to cure them" and curing doesnt earn loyalty... The ending is good...like watching a thriller movie and having the abuser arrested or incapacitated... Good edit...
Aside from main lead from Bof "Baek Kyung" from extraordinary you is unarguably one of the most toxic characters I have ever seen aside from the plot , him changing at end and not meaning his past actions which were supposedly a show , he broke my heart ... Yall I watched the series for lee jae wook the guy playing baek Kyung , I couldn't help but hate him he acts too well that too at such a young age 😭
The first time i watch BOF when i was in grade school and i use to believe that the story was sweet and normal and nothing was wrong, but as i rewatch it again since someone said that their relationship was toxic asf she is not wrong tho,
Yes to this video. I volunteered at a Sexual Assault Center years ago answering night and weekend calls. It was disheartening to learn how many teenagers had no idea what constitutes sexual assault or abusive relationships. Thailand dramas are the worst in these areas. After watcing a few trailers, I am left hoping their dramas aren't a reflection of Thailand's treatment of women.
thankyou so much for posting this and making it clear to everyone that such behaviors are unacceptable and can not be ignored just because of the fact you are attached to that particular person. I appreciate your effort in making this video. Thankyou.
С этого удара Джанди с ноги, началась моя любовь к дорамам. Этот кадр увидела случайно 6 лет назад. Понятия про дорамы не имела, но захотелось посмотреть, что ж там такое произошло. И этот взгляд ЛиМинХо надолго поселился в моем сердце. Он много лет был номер один. А теперь список любимых актеров так велик. А дорам пересмотрела, не перечесть. Другого кино для меня давно нет.
We shouldn't bear abuse in the name of love. We should be respected and cherished. Above all we ought to love ourselves and have dignity, what we deserve? If thaf person don't do what is needed to do in order to have a healthy relationship, we break the relationship and move on. There are more fish in the ocean.
Yes absolutely💯 these behaviours are not romantic, it may look normal in a drama or movie but in reality it is abusive and heartbreaking, thank you for making this video ❤️
I thought i am only 1 who thinks asian dramas show women as puppets...😌THANK GOD THERE ARE LOT OF PPL WHO HATE DRAMAS WHERE FL IS TOO WEAK TO PROTECT HERSELF 😅
Oh yes. Preach sister. And what alot of kdramas have. Stepping into their personal space, cornering them, being a textbook a-hole and usually the girl being naive and embarrassed of her choices. I mean stand up for yourself please.
As much as I love It’s okay to not be okay can’t deny the fl was toxic af like. I hate the fact that in dramas if one of the leads have bad experiences from the past or trauma they will be rude and toxic and take it out on others. Like literally hate this concept in dramas. A prime example is Suho from True beauty like he also was so controlling and toxic.
Lol here comes suho haters In dat case the second ml is no less toxic Nd his blind loser fans like u can't even point out ur fav mistake shows ur hypocrisy Stfu
Drama writers need to stop romanticizing abusers. 1.They start by casting very attractive men. 2. They mask the toxic behavior with background excuses about why they're abusers. 3. The female lead is happy and grateful when he stops the abuse because "she changed him for the better"
one thing I know for sure that in real life no person changes for anyone not even in love. And they might end up getting in the worst situation possible.
If I see someone breaking down anything in anger or quick to temper anytime that's it I am done. I have anger issues too but I just cry out of frustration. Taking your anger out other things is always a bad sign
My honest opinion on it okay to not be okay: It was a good kdrama and all, but it was kinda toxic though. Ko Moon-young did not give any time or had any patience with Gang-tae, he did have to look after his brother and all. But I don’t blame her that much though because of her bad past, she had a father who didn’t even notice her presence. But her mother was INSANE with her, the fact that she did not let Ko moon-young choose her hair length and controlled most of her life, is insane not okay. She had literally been stuck inside the castle for half her life and had zero experience with people, which led her to being jealous and afraid that Gang-tae will lose feelings for her and forget about her eventually. Of course, Ko Moon-young would not want that as Gang-Tae was the only person she could trust and lean onto. That’s my thought, of course y’all could disagree with me which is totally fine cause everyone has a different opinion
The problem is there are always reasons why the other side is traumatised enough to bully / abuse the girl or boy that they choose as partner / punching bag. Although it is okay to not be okay, it is not okay to treat another person shitty. Even when you’re jealous …
@@yolandavanderzee3854EXACTLY. thank you for saying that. It's just like Billy from Stranger Things, so many fans loved him after he died saying “he changed, had an abusive past and shouldn't have been killed” like wtf?? The thing is, every abuser has a traumatic past themselves, that doesn't mean we shouldn't protect ourselves and it's our duty to heal them since no one did. Yes it's harsh, but it's not. Seriously. Stop with this thinking, it's not cute. The “I can fix him/her”.
I will only defend True Beauty here. Not the bullies, never the bullies. But main leads (all of them) are teengers, they need some time and room for growth.
True some are irreverent like getting jealous a little and being a bit possessive sometimes is not toxic also true beauty wasn't toxic at all he treated her soo sweetly in whole series as if she is a baby
Thanks for making this K-Drama video and examples of toxic behaviour. After seeing these examples I am in one, someone who takes their anger out on me, even though it was not my fault. Overly possessive and jealous... and many more. Thank you again for making this and saving my misery... ❤
Yes and some of them aren't toxic it is human behaviour to sometimes get a little jealous and possessive also soo ho from true beauty wasn't toxic he always treated her soo sweetly as if she were a baby
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