"UGLY STAGE" is an understatement...🫠 Mixed Media Illustration Process ☔️✍️ 

it's refreshing to see such a successful and skilled artist be honest about their struggle. It makes me feel less crappy about my own issues with art

Some pieces just have a mind of their own! It's the same way with writing a story. Sometimes the characters absolutely don't want to do what you're writing them to do.

I like the version with the drops as much as the version with the fish! But maybe the fish version is more original, and I love how you just went with it. I also like how they followed a "pattern" for the background fish and the front fish, I feel like I would've done it in all directions and all sizes, ignoring the sense of depth!! Thank you so much for showing us this process! I'm sorry it was kind of a painful one but you putting it out here makes me feel not so bad that my process isn't linear either haha 😭 I don't know how some artists can do that. I definitely can't! Thank you for sharing ❤

Gorgeous!! I'm glad you were able to power through this illustration because the end result is so beautiful. Lighting from below is so tricky for some reason, I always have to use a reference or I'll mess it up.

Thank you for sharing your struggle. I’ve been struggling with art block myself and so many of your comments about your feelings and thoughts are what I’m hearing in my head when I try to set. I will persevere more next time. I is a lovely piece. ❤❤

idk, but i really love how the pencil tecsture looks in the end!!! it gives really soft vibes to the illustration. thx for video tho it was really nice to watch!

omg this video is so entertaining and dramatic and the b roll was so cuteeeee💗💗💗💖💗💗

Maybe looking at a picture of the stereotypical spooky flashlight under face as a reference would’ve helped wrap your head around the lighting?

Well done for persevering!! It turned out excellent!! ❤

i loved that you didn't give up with the paint! beautiful results 🥰

Wow! This turned out soo good! ❤❤❤🎉 I have several ugly stage pieces I have quit on...the struggle to push through is real and this video is just the inspiration I needed to get my supplies back out and keep pushing. Soo happy you're back. I've really missed your illustration videos!

love your style

It looks wonderfull 🌟

You did it again, unexpected using the fish and it turned out amazing; thank you so much for sharing your creative journey with all of us.

Thank you for this video. I rarely see artists sharing their struggle, especially with such honesty and cincerity, even though most of us have these times where we are fighting against the artwork and the materials instead of having a straight forward process.

Maybe using chalk pastel pencils would be helpful! Keeping that softer texture overall would be easier with them! Also when you’re laying down initial washes I would use a heat tool to dry each layer. It would help you place value more strategically in areas so you have to tweak them less in the middle to end stages. Drying in between layers is going to give you that depth and control you’re looking for! Love your work and I hope that helps!

I love how you continue to add more paint/details even though you find it kinda miserable at first, if that happens to me I might just start another painting.. well, a new lesson gained! Also, thank you for uploading a new process of this kind of painting, I really really love the art style! ❤❤

glad you pushed through! This turned out so beautiful!

When I reach the ugly phase, I stop for some time and I come back later so I won't ruin the piece

great job with the shading, especially on the face 😀 like the rest of us artists, you were being way too hard on yourself during the ugly stage. that stage does suck a lot but it wasnt as bad as you thought 😀

Hey! Since you become so insecure sometimes during your process I want to list a few specific things that make you one of the best artists I know: - your sense of volume is incredible, every detail looks very 'chunky' and dimensional - unique voice/aesthetic (adorable sad clowns?) - sophisticated sense of color, like how you put green and purple and blue into skin tones and it looks great? So easy to look muddy in the end but you pull it off - dedication to traditional art, with your level of frustration many would've probably just switched to digital lol - making simple things look interesting, like just a standing pose or eating pizza or holding an umbrella look specific and dynamic in the way you do it - patience Thank you for your videos!

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do u speak french??? i saw that “il pleut”

I don't think any painting is beautiful from the beginning lol. Mine always have that "Oh god do I even want to finish this" stage then I push through and it's good again lol.

FINALLY. SOMEONE ELSE SAYS IT. It's always with painting or Multimedia pieces too. 😭😭.

the struggle you felt with the process of this illustration was intense but the final result is amazing! i love the markmaking and the depth and atmosphere created in the piece

Chris, as someone who has long admired lighting, subtleties and spontaneous moments in your work, it is heartening to hear you speak so honestly of the struggle. Of course, I’d prefer it didn’t have to be such a wrestle, but seeing folks we admire have to work at it, it means these skills are learnable! Thanks so much for sharing; I love your tender moody clowns 💚✨ Mel x

To get rid of the texture that colour pencils have, you could try using ‘zest it’ (aka a sort of liquid) as that helps break down the pigment and make the texture go away entirely, hope this helps :)

Her expression made so much sense when you added the fish 🐟

I love this. How you, after struggling a bit, decide to go with it and use coloured pencils and markers. You were more free and your creativity was let loose. Love the fishies swimming around your character. 💙💜

I’m not a fan of adding pencils over watercolour either, the flowy soft texture is too nice 🥺 I also appreciate you sticking with the original as much as possible whilst changing things, I usually abandon and go straight over with gouache haha 😂

After decades of beating myself up for “ruining” a piece and I finally realised it just IS my process. It is the process for what feels like most artists. My work has blossomed since I stopped fighting the fuglies, being open to new techniques and trusting the process and my skills. Your work is gorgeous.

I absolutely LOVE this piece- especially the color pencil's sketchy texture. It's pretty interesting to see the difference in perspective from artist to audience as I found the moments you hated the most (in the piece) the most beautiful.

wiggling cat cameo at 3:06 was adorable

It’s beautiful, and I appreciate you showing your struggle! It helps to see how to move forward when you feel stuck. I’ve made the mistake of starting too dark with my watercolour paintings many times and I usually start over, but now I might try adding new media. Side note, something about that lovely soft lighting reminds me of Bao Pham’s work. Love it! ❤

I think its really important that artist post their struggles and "failed" art too. because we all have those, and it's important to have some representation of that. For pencils on top of watercolor I find that faber Castell Polychromos on hot press paper are the ones that leaves the smoothest results (holbein or Prismacolor premier leaves much more texture as they are softer). I also like to blend with a Q-tip for bigger areas. For the shine using a solvent is good at dosolving the binder in colored pencils (but I find it makes coloird a bit less opaque) You coud also directly use watercolor pencils Have you tried using diluted gouache on top of your watercolours when you want to lighten areas ? It would give a smoother results, still stay mat and give that little bit of opacity to "correct" or lighten areas with watercolor on them. I think it would work great for you workflow !

Beautiful awesome work💖💜❤💜❤❤💞❤💞❤💜❤💞💗❤💛💝💞💖💞💖💞💞👍💞👍👍💞👍💞💕💞💖💞

This video was so sorely needed for me. I spent the weekend really at war with a piece of my own - and right now it looks FINE, but the struggle I went through to get there really has me doubting myself. It’s nice to see other artists in the same boat.

Sometimes u gotta embrace uncertainty in the artistic process 😩 at least that's what my therapist tells me ❤ I really love how this piece turned out at the end, I feel like all the struggle with the piece and the media became part of it in a really, really good way. The texture is very unique and fits perfectly with its mood and theme ❤ and it's really admirable the way u persevered with this one!! It's really a fantastic, gorgeous piece ❤❤❤

your channel helps me , I don't feel lonely about my art and depressed thoughts. thank you

you're back, nice to see you pop up on my feed again.

I think maybe you should look for inspiration so you can make more art. The only times i can make anything I feel is good, which is rarely, is when I'm inspired by something or someone.

You're so endlessly skilled, always such a pleasure to see your process! Also, I personally like the color pencil texture since your line direction and form is so clear and crisp it adds nice dimension >:)

I totally understand feeling stuck and upset in the middle of the process that happens to me a the time. Watercolor is so hard to correct, once you go dark is so hard to come back. You did great! The concept and final piece it's so good and you were able to fix and do some awesome mix media. Also I didn't know I can mix watercolor with alcohol ink markers, I love both I will try it next time. 💙🌟 Thanks for sharing this piece!

The texture is my favorite part about the pieces you make though. Along with the characters as well.

But the thumbnails with the kitty were amazing!

The piece turned out awesome. I really love the colors and texture. I’ve been going through a similar journey the past few years with doubting my art and my process, how things are always so hard and I have to brute force it to get through an artwork in a way that is minimally satisfying. It’s comforting to know that someone like you goes through the same thing and that it’s normal. I also really love your mixed media process. Great video overall :)

What a lovely process... it was good to hear the credit you gave yourself after completing the piece! Oftentimes, aspects of our lives and mental states heavily influence how well our art flow goes, and even though you seem to struggle a lot you still push through! Maybe the reason you "need to break the piece first" is also bc you're a very detailed planner when it cvomes to your pieces - both an advantage AND disatvantage, bc while it makes it possible to quickly map out what you want, it also sets up expectations as to what the piece should become. and since they rarely do turn out how we imagine, you can quickly get frustrated and disappointed. THAT'S wherre the "breaking the piece" comes in, doing something drastic and unexpected to destroy those expectations and just... let yourself have the freeedom to do whatever feels right again - a more intuitive direction, so to speak! no idea if i'm making sense, but either way you reflect this process very nicely and i wish you only the best in pushing forward!!!!

I love the piece!! It’s so beautifully color cohesive and mood it sets is so amazingly done!! The struggle feels so close to what I experience daily even though I am not nearly experienced as you are. It’s nice to see other artists also feel similar thoughts when drawing!!

As an illustrator I feel like the grief and struggle is part of the process and all the layers and layers of media and struggle really gives each piece a character and a depth. I think you’re doing it right I think there’s always room for struggle in a piece and maybe there SHOULD be struggle too

I'm so infinitely grateful that you showed this. I realise how hard it might've been for you, but this is so helpful. My sister and I are both struggling at the moment with overcoming this 'ugly stage' moment. And to be honest I've never been able to. I lacked perseverance, courage and hope, never trusted myself, never believed that I could actually pull it off. It just seemed so meaningless each time, the piece just looked ruined forever. And I gave up each time. And even if I tried to fix it, I got so tired in the process, unused to actually working on the piece, solving problems, and only inviting those pretty moments. I am really grateful to see unedited process of you going at it, boldly, cause now, even second-handedly, I have experienced what it is like to push through. And I hope now that this will help me to show discipline and do the same. So thank you very much. I can't explain how incredibly helpful it was 💜💜💜

I switched to digital very fast....

I think the fish direction works amazing with the lighting as well. I’m used to seeing this kind of greenish lighting from the bottom in pools at night. I feel like it ended up fitting even better than the raindrops.

I love how this turned out! Other people see different things in your art than you do. I feel ya tho. I am the queen of overthinking stuff. Just getting back to a place where it's ok to make a mess. Lol. Beautiful work.

I work in mixed media, here's a tip to get rid of colored pencil texture: If your pencils are oil based (like f.e. polychromos) you can use Odorless Mineral Spirit (mine is an 8oz from Talens, goes such a long way!). 1) Soak a q-tip in it and then go over the sections with a light hand. Let the spirit soak into the paper and "dissolve/liquify" the colored pencil. You could also use a fine mister to apply ober larger areas but I only ever used it on small parts so I don't know how well that would work. 2) If the texture hasn't "melted out" enough, go over the sections with a soft brush and blend it out like you would eye shadow. I'd advice against using the q-tip for blending if you have rougher paper, since it can happen that you take off color from the raised areas. 3) Some safety tips for OMS: 🔶 Keep it away from pets. Air out the room before you let pets inside after use/ after the drawing is dry. 🔶 Only ever open the bottle to soak your q-tip in it, then close it again immediately. Just bc it doesn't have odor doesn't mean it can't cause headaches or damage to your nasal mucous membrane & your lungs, they're even more easily harmed bc you can't smell anything. 🔶 Work with an open window if you go over big areas, for small sections just open the window afterwards. 🔶 Dedicate a sythethic fiber brush for OMS use, continued use will slightly damage your brushes from my experince so don't use expensive equipment. I taped my brush to the bottle so I can't forget😂 Handled the right way OMS is such game changer! Used on smoother paper, the texture blends into the rest and even can create watercolor-like marks :) I absolutely love it.

Girl, when it got so muddy, I felt your panic. Good for you for sticking it out! I might have left it for a couple of days in my frustration. hahaha It turned out great!

I love it and the moodiness of it too. It's great to see how you fixed what you didn't like. Really is beautiful and adorable at the same time. I like using different media so the colored pencil and marker over watercolor is nice to me- it adds texture and depth.

I just ruined a drawing of mine JUST NOW (TBF I was experimenting with poster paint which were mediums I never used) and was doubting if I'll ever get as good as artists like you. Seeing this gives me hope and so much assurance! Thank you for the video; the piece is gorgeous!

The struggle is real, LOL. I now what you mean though. I have had some pieces that tested my sanity but, the end result was pretty satisfying.

She is Beautiful! great job! i admire your tenacity….I probably would have ditched her and started over……Thanks for sharing!

One thing, I’m currently struggling on is where I’m like, I really need to relieve from stress and life in general. So I scroll thru Pinterest awhile and find something that really calls to me. I sketch, and I add the base colors. Then suddenly like a flipping a light switch, I look, and I HATE it. I end up throwing it away bc it’s just so ugly, I can’t even look at it. It makes me feel frustrated and upset

Since you don't like using coloured pencils have you maybe tried watercolour pencils? You can add them on top of paintings and add water with a brush to blend it out. when water is added they also don't have that waxy texture so you can draw on top with inks or any other media edit: i use the faber castell watercolour pencils this way

Оh, I saw you in pinterest. I like your artworks. They are so unusual, expressive and beautiful. I'm inspired by you!👁🦕⛈️🌈

art's meant to be a work coming out of your mind. So its a 50/50 chance you're bound to bring something very ugly or beautiful. It's ok tho, you're human, and humans aren't perfect.

Your struggle is so relatable, and yes you should definitely marvel in your tenacity! It takes so much of that to conquer ourselves and keep going despite the things we tell ourselves. Well done, this piece is so beautiful and maybe the subject matter symbolizes the process this time? Haha

Wow I Love this piece ❤, and I really admire you for pushing through the rough stages. It was worth it 🥰

Its raining fish! Which is a cool Idea actually. Some of my favorite artworks started as failures, but this has been a cute piece all the way. I like seeing people handling this unavoidable part of art making.

Idea with adding fishes was very good move. Rain drops were too obvious on this ilustration = boring.

Thanks for sharing your journey through making this piece, especially telling about the struggles honestly. It turned out amazing, I really love it!

I know this is an old video but have you considered using gouache instead of colored pencil? I think it would be the perfect solution to correcting the too dark areas and it's such a good mix between an acrylic like paint and watercolor. It would really help in these kind of situations. I love your work so so much!

I’m sorry for the angst this piece brought to the table.💕 I enjoyed hearing your process. Hearing how you selected your tools and what you were hoping achieve as well as the medium’s limitations as you pushed and pulled the piece together has been really informative. It left me curious about markers, a medium I had never really know what to do with. Thank you for sharing :)

I'm so thankful you shared your process. I, too, have questioned and felt horrible about my creative process because everyone else's seemed so straight forward. But this proved that you don't have to have the perfect process to create beautiful art.

1:08 omggg can we pleaseee get a sketchbook tour?

Thank you for sharing your process and for pushing through, because it really looks great! Seeing your tenacity in real time really makes it that much more special imo. Is there a reason why you ended up using Prismacolors over your Polychromos for the colored pencil parts though?

I really appreciate you talking about the Fugly stage. I have so many false starts and been on a long "break" from art because I stopped fighting the Fugly stage. Thanks for the inspiration to get back to it with your gorgeous piece and talking about the stressful process.

I admire your patience. 😅 Unfortunately I lack this kind of endurance.

Seeing your journey is very helpful so thank you for sharing. I live just a few neighbourhoods West of where you sketched in the coffee shop across from Mt. Sinai :)

This is personal opinion ofc, but i don't think any part of this was ugly 🥺 I think you may be self critical to an extreme, maybe too perfectionist in chasing a vision, which makes the process so much harder. I don't know what a good way to deal with that is, but you could use gouache to lighten colours and paint over watercolor while keeping a similar texture 😅

I really enjoyed this video, I think sharing your struggles as an artist is really important for others to hear and empathize with. It reminds them that the artists they look up to struggle too.

I don't see what you're seeing. At no point EVER does this painting look amazing!! This is in your top 10 for sure. 🤩

It's like a cycle. Currently I'm finding all my illustrations ugly and always mess up the rendering. Then I start layering till the paper thins down and I try to salvage it (TT)

Love the illustration!! ❤ Good choice on the fishes. Her eyes are looking at them which moves the viewers eyes around. 👏

I'm glad you were able to push through! I've found that I have to have a solid plan and trust the process. It's very easy to get caught up in the process of painting and paint too much - for me it's what I don't paint that matters more. Your piece is very whimsical and has great depth!

I don't have a fugly stage Its a fugly process, It doesn't get pretty in the sketch or painting stage. It has to be 80% done before it gets any pretty. These %20 of are in the rendering stage and It takes the longest time.

maybe odorless mineral spirits would help you get rid of the colored pencil texture! i use them over watercolors frequently and it works well. this piece turned out great!

I just finished a shitty painting I hate. Not even sure I should post it or its process. Thank you for sharing your pain. XD

I just wanted to say that even your ugly stage looks good for me, tysm for sharing your struggle I relate to it a lot but I think u don’t have to be too hard on yourself, your art is awesome

i find it intriguing that you personally don't like the addition of so many pencil crayons in your work - what made me fall in love with your artwork was the use of the pencil crayons and their texture in your work and how well it works with water colours

Ha! My working process is pretty much always like this! Welcome to the club!

I think if you made this video with another voice over just pretending you don’t have anxiety and that every stroke was intentional that would also have made sense 😊

Dear Chris, beautiful work as always❤. Values can be such a hassle! Even though you struggled it’s really interesting to see how you approach the problems you encounter, and your creativity at bringing in different media or elements to solve them. It’s been especially cool to see how you’ve incorporated alcohol markers into your work. Speaking of, I also really love your cafe hop diaries and I was wondering how you go about choosing which markers to take with you when you go out because obviously you can’t take all of them but you still need to choose ones that go well together? Looking forward to your next video!😊

Chris, train yourself to do color swatching, blending colors before you commit them on the board to have more control over the outcome.

You did it! You created such a great illustration. Thank you for sharing the struggles.

I love this piece! 💖 you did amazing! 😃💕✨

You’re one of my favorite artists on RU-vid. It’s so enjoyable watching your process. Thanks for being so open and transparent. I always am in awe at your use of color and light. And, as a fellow owner of a beautiful gray cat, I appreciate the toe bean glamor shots

Try to wait when first layer of watercolours will be dry and then add more layers

Start with best intentions, create a problem, solve a problem. You're not the only one .

Can I just say.... I don't see the ugly stage... I just can't see what you see. 🤷‍♀

It is such a struggle for me to lay out colors and make it look not so muddy esp with water color and your work came out so nicely !!

I love the luminous quality and translucency. Beautiful use of mixed media. You inspire me to think outside the box and persevere!