You have no formal education. You are a fraud. You beg people to watch your videos so you can get ad revenue. No one who has ever """untaken""" the blackpill will have their problems solved. Nothing will change.
I've been trying to explain part of this to my friends, not with black pill, just absorbing negative information/news is making them unhappy and its better for them to ignore it or at least consume less of it.
@@Tailionis True, and if they were doing even a little to try and change those truths for the better I would encourage them, but all they do is be sad, nothing else comes from it. Being informed is good and healthy, being consumed by negativity and only negativity while ignoring the good is neither helpful nor accurate or 'true'.
Looksmax, settle, get extremely lucky, or die alone. These are your 4 options when it comes to online dating as an average looking guy. Hypergamy will continue to exist regardless of whether or not you choose to acknowledge it.
I would say that number one (after just hearing the initial post): stop looking for friends on tinder. Most people are not on there for friends, so you already have a limited pool, but also women don't often believe when guys say "just looking for friends" because guys often lie about that to get in your pants. It's so hard to meet people offline, and I get that, but frankly meeting them online is frustrating too
Amen to that. Tinder has a pretty strong reputation for being a hookup platform. You are way more likely to find people who are interested in friendship by joining local clubs.
what a way to twist the narrative to blame the dudes. The reality is girls want hot guys to have sex on tinder and/or validation. Nothing else. If you say you just want to be friends it hurts their ego and they get mad.
@@paulogaspar8295 I'm not trying to twist the narrative. My point is that tinder is a shit place to look for friends because most people on there (including many people--guys and girls--who say they're just there for friends) are there for hookups or dating. The genders used in my comment reflected the genders in the post
@@ReadmyBioo Clueless. Looks are everything and this brown doctor is just a grifter who helps no one. The blackpill isn't a negative thing, it's just reality and it's better to stop gaslighting ugly and short men.
cancer survival is a perfect analogy , i also nearly died, and once did die for 2 minutes, and was revived and ....the survival years that follow are strong, as you said resiliant, etc, great show HG !!!!!!!!!!! however , later on my wife and son died in the Thai Tsunami , and that has been harder to bounce back from .
I think it's much easier to understand the concept of a fart chamber than of an echo chamber, so I'll use it from now on. Thanks for the funny explanation! 😁
4:53 thats so true... looking at my social circle. i work with athletes so i know a lot of "chads" and average people. most chads dont have kids, because they have soo many opportunities that a lot of them cant handle a serious relationship. its like they suffer from the "being beautiful curse" or something. in the other hand, most average guys already have kids when they are 30 or even younger. i think social media has a huge impact on this. because a chad wants to always be the "high value man" forever. and having kids and a wife, puts you out of the market inmediatly (at least if you are a decent person).
And if you kept being negative and didn't do anything for yourself you only gonna bet in that shitty state people like you are in. Ffs work on yourself, go outside, go to the gym, go somewhere that relates to your hobbies and talk to people! You only shoot yourself in the foot by not trying. And you might respond saying 'well I've been doing all those things for x amount of time', then good keep doing it because your on the right path, it might take time but don't give up. Fuck the blackpill 🖕
Society and its members are adapting _around_ the internet. We're finding what's great online (shopping) and what when put online works worse (dating).
Yes, exactly! Dating sites is like window shopping. We're just looking and trying stuff to see what works and what needs improvement. Real relationships is like investing in a portfolio and you can't do that easily online when it comes to a person because you miss out on so much. To go back to the smells analogy, a shampoo might look nice online but until you are in contact, it may not smell so nice. Smell, taste, feel, touch and hear. We experience someone as well as our reality with all of our available senses.
Online dating is the new norm. Back in highschool *ALL* girls in my graduation class had Tinder and were swiping left on 99% of guys. Most had 20 year old 6'7 Gigachad mogger boyfriends. Saying blackpill is wrong is literally lying.
@@j.d.s.1837 explain to me how ALL girls manage to end up with the 0.5% of guys that are 6'7? just because youre a loser doesn't mean you have to drag everyone down with you, most people find a partner, go touch some grass
@@j.d.s.1837 what i don't get about black pill is, even if it's not wrong, why give a crap? Like, do you really need to be in a relationship/laid to live a fulfilling life?
@@Moose92411 I did not turn physical fitness into an outlet for negative emotions. I just sit at my PC all day, not going outside, and when I try to exercise, it usually makes me feel awful, and I never want to do it again. - I'm not obese, but I sure am not fit, and lots oh health issues. Not too serious yet, but I can see the trajectory... I am also tired all the time, and have no willpower to improve anything. - and I have no idea what my outlet for negative emotions is, if I have any. I just focus on either intellectual stuff, or "fun" stuff, that is sufficiently attention capturing for me to ignore the awful reality around. (which, relative to others is probably not even that bad, but my brain interprets it as not worth living in)
@@Verrisin have you started really small? If you did ten pushups a day, or walked one mile a day, for a week, then moving to 11 or 1.25 miles, and holding yourself accountable along the way?
@@Moose92411 I don't like going outside, but I did daily exercises, for about 5 days. Then I got sick, so I stopped, and did not restart for a long time. - I tried a few times after, sometimes even smaller stuff than what you wrote... I just always gave up after 1-5 days. - It's what I said about willpower: Now and then I feel like I can do it ... but most days I dread getting up to go pee. 😕 - I definitely don't think I've ever managed to hold myself accountable. Giving up is easier. (I don't believe I will be successful anyway.)
AFAIK blackpills don't exactly think that only handsome guys get dates. They think women in their prime years can afford to be much more picky that rationally justified. After that, men's chances go up (but can end up as a provider in an unhappy relationship). The other part of this belief (ugly=creepy, handsome=flirty) is kind of justified. There are plenty of studies that people are biased towards a good-looking person.
@@jakejason4333 evidence +based treatments. It is a specific form of therapies, and not what you think I meant but something you would no doubtedly benefit from.
Black pill is not prescriptive, it is descriptive. It offers realistic view of dating market and dynamics. What you do with that is up to you, but since the reality is so harsh and so different from the blue pilled view of romantic relationships we are taught as kids, most people can’t face it and need a cope. Notice how every criticism of black pill is about “negativity”, which is basically people projecting their reaction were they to accept the truth of the black pill. It’s not a criticism of the truth of the matter. I’d argue the opposite - after the initial shock the black pill is freeing. You realize IT IS NOT YOUR FAULT. Some things are out of your control. You become stoic.
@@fireflyredux3373 black pill arguments aren't entirely false, but if you fixate on them, they become your entire narrative and it doesn't leave you with motivation to try and go beyond them...
@@oroderes If you consider black pill arguments to be false its because you have someone trying to sell you his online course on how to be a sigma male. All the black pill ever did was describe- accurately mind you- plainly and exactly how short-term relationships are becoming far more the norm than long term relationships and how that effects the male attractiveness bell curve. What you do with that information (Your actions + "motivation" as you put it) is entirely up to you and not the purview of the black pill. Which is exactly what OP said. It's giving you the cold hard truth of the matter, nothing more, nothing less. If you can't figure out what "descriptive" vs "prescriptive" is, that's on you. If you think you can outperform the black pill with self-help books and cardio your sadly mistaken and will probably spend the rest of your life labeled as a "creep" by women. (That's for 3's and below on the female Short Term dating market, aka 85-92% of all sexual relationships atp) And to answer your question, yes, ugly people date ugly people and get married. Talk to any ugly guy whos currently or used to put himself out there (I was one till I got mass and cleared my acne, look at that, a direct source!) and he'll tell you that not even the ugly women wanted him. His DM's weren't dull, they we're nonexistent.
It’s hilarious to see how big Wheat Waffles has gotten to where I keep seeing large channels make videos about him. I found him when he had like 5 videos with 1000 views. His collabs with Alexander Grace and FACEandLMS really helped and from there he kept exploding
@@SB-nh7uv If you define black pill as a strict ideology then yes he is not black pilled. I am not either but I subscribe to many beliefs that are black pilled to most people. I get downvoted on Reddit no matter how logical and balanced I present the views bc most of society is profoundly delusional when it comes to why certain men get certain women. I had a guy literally tell me women get sexually aroused by money, these guys are living in fantasy land. A rich lesbian could pay a straight woman to be with her, doesn’t mean she’s attracted. Even Wheat I would argue is wrong about Tinder. Once you understand how Tinder works in that the reason most guys get few likes is just bc women aren’t seeing their profile+bad photos there’s no reason to think someone who didn’t give you the right swipe on Tinder is gonna say yes in person 99.99% of the time. There’s variation in the beliefs we hold about this stuff but we all share the impact of looks, predetermined limitations, and how hard it really is for most men to be successful with women. Which most of society doesn’t understand. They think an average guy who does x y and z could rack up a high body count if he wanted when in reality he’s lucky to reach 5 looksmatched women let alone above
Black pill feels like a pretty logical conclusion for a generation of guys who’s entire life experiences with women have been altered by the internet. On top of that, we have so much available information now, it’s much easier to *think* we know something about the world without ever testing or experiencing it.
Yeah, its easy to blame the state of the world rather than remembering you exist in that world and have influence in it too. It might bring shame, but you have to forgive yourself for your inaction
That is literally not true, most in//cels have tried dating in real life BEFORE they came to the community. And most just had the normie experience of being rejected by everyone, before reading any comment or viewing any video.
@@x80HDx Man most of these folks forget that they are too part of the reason why they have issues with dating. Most of these "pillers" hate themselves or have mental illnesses/disabilities. Those things alone can play a part to why they consume these pill theories. Mental health, self reflection, and self awareness is the key!
this doctor later in his life gets 1 girl and suddenly he is an expert on women and dating? there are 15 yr old guys with more experience than him.........
The video isn't about dating he almost completely avoided that topic. t's about how negative feedback cycles affect your brain and how to break out of them.
48:19-48:43 actually made me well up. I have some friends, good friends too. But mostly I want to be alone. I don't want to be a burden on others. I don't think I can actually help them, and then if I come burdening, I feel guilty. And of course I won't actually open up, because that's a huge burden. The sort of burden I don't seem myself taking for others. So I just stay alone. Keep to myself. Think about things myself. And that sucks.
I think the biggest struggle for some, in order to "stop believing in [insert color pill here]", is that some of what these people are saying is true. Yes, physical attraction is an important component in someone's desire to be with another. Yes, attraction has a lot to do with shallow/arbitrary characteristics that have nothing to do with if you're a "good person", or anything else you would think or hope makes you desirable to another. It's what can make dating so frustrating and hard. Where black/redpill types go wrong is getting hung up on these things and thinking they are all that matter, but I think it's easy to see why. When I talk to women or people in general, I feel sort of disillusioned about the whole thing because I see some of this stuff too. I don't know of any woman who's ever been attracted to me, for example, that didn't mention my looks at least once, so it's hard not to feel like it matters so much, even if it's not all they care about.
Looking good is hard and takes hard work. That makes it a GOOD measure of romantic suitability. Why would this be a depressing idea? Yes there's some people that get a head start. But once you're in your 30s, or even late 20s, there's no way to keep it up without massive amount of work, discipline, and asthetic talent. Attractiveness is not just a shallow measure of a person. It correlates (not perfectly) with long-term mindset. You might be beautiful on the inside. If you are, show it. Find clothing that looks good on you. Experiment with cheap jewlery/accessories. Take care of your health, by eating well and caring about yourself. Demonstrate the ability to love yourself by showering regularly, wearing deoderant, and brushing your teeth. Give your body the exercise it needs to live a long life. Live optimistically about the future and your presence in it, and these behaviors will come easily, without effort. If you do those things, you'll be attractive. It's that simple. It might take time to dig out of the hole, but its simply a question of persistence. There is nothing stopping pretty much anyone from doing these things. (The best part? Do these things and you'll be living a great life, maybe to the point where being single will stop being such a burden) If you can't do these things, it says a LOT about what is going on inside you. And honestly, why shouldn't people use physical appearance then as a shortcut measure of romantic suitability?
@@anthonyskrzypczak9437 This is so facts, couldn't have said it better. If someone can't at least portray themselves in a confident and attractive way, I think it says a lot about their romantic suitability. Not everything, but when relationships require time, effort, and emotional investment, of course people will weigh their options with extreme scrutiny. I find that people that consider attractiveness to be a shallow measure, are typically unhappy with themselves.
@@anthonyskrzypczak9437 um non of this is going to make you taller or change your facial structure the most important looks factors can bearly be changed no matter how much effort you put in minus surgery which had tge possibilities of making things worse
@@PrincessMeganLeigh statistically speaking physical attraction is the biggest determinor or relationship access and success. look up the study "stated preferences vs what actually lead to relationships in speed dating trials" ot show that while ladies say they care about intelligence and personality those things did not actually predict dating success looks did about the same amount for both men and ladies. so in other words it's not that men cant conceptualize attraction that isn't physically its that men are honest.
You are talking to a wall. They pick some young aged doomers (like waffles) and present them as the majority of cels. Even now, that red pillers are turning black and many people completly accept and use bp terms from the celwiki themselves, now. Just ask the creator of this clip.: What would be needed in order to prove common bp knowledge? How many more statistics and how many more million experiences do you need? I find it funny, that people ask this guy about that topic. JFL. Imagine him going out and asking girls out. Holy mother Macree... Then after he got rejected by every single girl, that doesn't know about his internet fame, he walks back into his room. Sits on his chair and tells you, that it is all bs. The bp is not true at all 🤣
@@timothywade9618 Yes Yes Yes you don’t have a choice, loneliness is one of the biggest factors for unhappiness and decrease of life expectancy you have a biological and survival based imperative to get out there denying it will only hurt in the long run
@Richaroo There's definitely a degree of truth to the black pill, but saying getting a job is completely dependent on your attractiveness is a ridiculously massive overstatement. With the right skills, you can do contract work from your chair, online, without having your face published. And irl, minimum wage jobs don't give a crap how you look. They'll take just about anyone. Especially with the labor shortage. And for a final counterexample: Asmongold. He goes weeks at a time without showering and has a room littered with trash and is a huge twitch streamer.
@Richaroo nothing can you make you taller or attractive, no matter how much you lift. Self improvement is important, but it isn't gonna save you. To me, the only thing I'm aiming for is money, it's the best cope I have. I just want to live financially stable.
“I went from negative thinking to positive thinking. I’m not blackpilled anymore and am doing much better in life yaaaaay” What fking bp are they talking about
@@Mew2Win They probably meant sadness or despair, but not an actual ideology. One thing is to have a good mood, another thing is to recognize that odds are stacked against you and there is nothing you can do to fix rigged situation. Normies have a misconception that blackpill is an ideology based on mood. But actually mood is the result of reality as perceived by ideology.
Why would it? Dr K would say yup it is a meat platter and people will take advantage of it as much as they get away with. Hed then say if you don’t have success on there then get off there. Simple as that.
It’s another load of bullshit you can obviously work on yourself and mindset but you can’t force attraction to women if they don’t find you attractive because of your face or height for instance
DR k is talking so much non sense his explanations are not even proven by empirical data while Blackpillers have a ton of evidence. Watch women behavior if you want the answer, most women are lovely when they find you attractive. It’s another load of bullshit you can obviously work on yourself and mindset but you can’t force attraction to women if they don’t find you attractive because of your face or height for instance.
Tell me more about how its all going to be alright and how I should just bury my head in the sand to cope. Im sure that'll help me feel better. What do you do when you see reality backing up this black pill stuff? Choose to ignore it? At what point do we admit that we're ignoring reality to feel better. The problem is that even if you pretend its not there, reality doesn't go away.
It’s not natural to give up on mating yes some people are so screwed it’s almost impossible but that doesn’t make black pill worthwhile. A good percentage of black pillers are just people who have low self esteem and found an ideology that appeals, for this reason people will never agree to the black pill it’s not a positive mindset
I see His comments about group therapy reflected in my interactions with school clubs. When I go to anime club no one is going to judge my love for fictional pirates and mecha battles. Has really helped me get out of my shell. Now I can talk to people about the things I’m passionate about with far less feelings of anxiety.
4:35 Wrong. Settling with someone reliable after you had as much fun with as you could, does not disprove this point. Also you can't tell if they doesn't cheat or wouldn't cheat when opportunity is presented. Also there are "boring people" who has next to no free time for "adventures".
What is it that men actually want/need from dating and relationships? What is it that is best for lifetime satisfaction? I get the impression that there aren't clearly set plausible goals for what most men require to be happy in dating. Off the top of my head, it seems to me that the following are a realistic set of targets that would mostly satisfy most men: 1) Lost virginity by age 19 2) Have had at least 5 sexual relationships or hook-ups with women they find attractive before age 25 3) Have a longterm relationship with a woman they find attractive, which offers the potential for living together and children if they wish, that lasts at least 10 years Are these reasonable? They seem the minimum requirement for mental health and met needs imho. Following that, who can plausibly attain those goals? It seems evident to me that to get those things, a man would need to meet certain criteria, both in looks and elsewhere. They would realistically have to be 5'7 +, not be obese, have at least a 4/10 face, not be highly neurodivergent nor seriously mentally ill, have reasonable social skills, not be desperate, have a job or be a student, and not be seriously disabled. Am I wrong int hat assessment? It seems self-evident to me that someone who doesn't meet those basics, especially if they fail in multiple areas, doesn't have a realistic chance of achieving those goals (though I admit there will be one or two exceptions).
I'm 42. I felt this way but before the internet. I had an echo chamber inside my own head. It wasn't as bad, but gosh. What would have become of me if I was born 10 or 20 years later? I'd probably have gotten stuck in these echo chambers and mindsets too. For what it's worth, I'm autistic, all my boyfriends have been autistic, and many of them were former incels. I didn't find them in the incel echo chambers though. I found them after they got themselves out somehow.
@twelvecatsinatrenchcoat It's not giving up hope in yourself, its accepting your circumstances in life and not allowing your unmet desires to conquer your sanity. You are okay whether you get something you want or not because you have in-built stoicism and self sufficiency
4:30 I think this argument falls apart, because the statement is about current situation, not what was happening 40 or even 20 years ago. There was no internet like we know it today. No dating sites. Most of the people met each other in close geographical proximity and in real life. Now it is completely different. Women have access to literally UNLIMITED pool of dudes. No wonder they will not settle for an average guy, especially socially awkward and not good looking. And no wonder that sometimes wiring inside brains of both genders is fried and no longer works properly.
Also data from tinder and other dating apps is showing that this statistic in true. Maybe not exactly 10%, I don't remember how much exactly, but tendency is there and it is clearly visible.
Also "just go outside and see who has kids", and second later he demolishes his argument of going outside, because it is not real experiment. Real statistics show, that men on average are in celibate much more often than women. Are much more lonely. And again - that women are picking only top percent of the guys. This is what data is showing.
"Go out looking for parents. If women are only willing to date the top 10% you should only see good looking guys married." This argument falls apart when you consider women who want to date and want to have sex with one type of man, but settle down and have a family with another type of man. I never got a date in my life, and I've been married for 13 years (together for 21) with my first and only girlfriend, while I'm her 14th or 15th partner. A woman like my wife would never in her worse nightmares would have dated a guy like me when we were both in our late teens or early 20s.
@@untilm at 25-30 years old having 15 partners is not even that many. i'm a 24 year old male and have had over 10 long/short term partners, some serious others not so much. i'd be more wary of someone who's had 3 long term (+2 year) relationships fail than someone who has had casual hook ups and summer flings etc. Long term relationships are kept alive by personality and the ability to co operate and communicate with your partner.
@@Modi_ Studies show marriage success is inversely proportional to the number of past partners a person has had, I think including hookups. I think I'd rather date someone who has had 3 long-term failed relationships than someone who has had many hookups.
@@untilm its becoming more and more normal for people to hook up at early adulthood for millenials/zoomers. older studies into infidelity in marriage most likely overlook the fact that sleeping around with a lot of different partners wasn't that socially accepted or normal in the 70's/80's like it is now. i get where you're coming from tho, my gf of 3 years has had close to 15 partners and only a single over a year long relationship before we started dating.
Look. You can break down the path to recovery, take each step in isolation and say "just do this or that", thereby implying it's impossible to do that thing. Like "sure, doc, if I could, I *would* just do it but obviously I can't". That'll get you nowhere. The question is: why do you adopt this "can't" attitude? And why do you need to feign incompetence to people?
"taking the blackpill" isn't an issue I have now (though I went through a period where I started feeling the start of that), but this video is a really good breakdown of any negative spiral feedback loop and how to break out of it. Becoming aware of particular emotions and triggers, learning to be okay with the uncomfortable emotions instead of having to do something to get rid of them *right now*, and eventually growing away from those destructive thought patterns is ultimately the core of most healing cycles I've been through or seen experienced. It's hard, it sucks to do and it feels like you're "just ignoring the problem" sometimes but it really does work and helps you be so much happier (or at least more content) in the long run.
DR k is talking so much non sense his explanations are not even proven by empirical data while Blackpillers have a ton of evidence. Watch women behavior if you want the answer, most women are lovely when they find you attractive. It’s another load of bullshit you can obviously work on yourself and mindset but you can’t force attraction to women if they don’t find you attractive because of your face or height for instance.
ah a shame, this was a miss this video. You can't untake something you didn't willingly take in the first place. Only one that does not have success can truly understand.
@@3n3j0t4 Exactly. The whole discussion is about mentality, personality, etc. when really mentality doesn't matter if you are so ugly, that you cannot get girls to talk with you in the first place.
@@j.d.s.8132 everyone can be a 7/10 with work and dedication. looks dont help you with holding relationships, improving your mentality and becoming someone you would see yourself dating helps 100x more than being a blank slate personality wise and looking like a model. all you end up getting as a attractive person is fwb's and shallow hook ups on tinder.
I have been feeling extremely exhausted at work lately. This helped me realize that its because I'm heavily suppressing all the shitty things I'm feeling. Thank you so much!
The point Dr. k made about group and how it benefits us is so true. I often tell people that this is my favourite RU-vid Chanel and it’s helped me a lot. Which is confusing to some because I’m not an incel or a gamer. I am a fashionista party girl who uses Instagram as my main platform. But I love the way dr. K breaks down things in a systematic way. Most people who talk about emotions or spirituality say it in a feeling way but I need it explained step by step in a cognitive analytical way before I get it. Tldr: I agree, you don’t have to have the same specific problem for this to apply
Ya me too i totally love it I don't use insta but I am quite social love painting and chess, an also I am kind of aiming for psychiatry..not sure it in 5th year of ug but let's see
It seems to me that saying: "girls only ever want hot rich guys because that's what my findings on Tinder suggested" is very similar to saying: "people only ever want greasy hamburgers and fries because that's what my findings at McDonald's suggested". There's a heavy sampling bias there. Yeah sure, we almost all agree that greasy hamburgers and fries are really pleasureful, but that's no reason to include them in your diet often, if at all.
There's a major flaw in the comparison because hot guys are not bad for women like junk food is for people. I don't think the black pill is selling hopelessness, it is selling truth.
@@ThahnG413 It's not selling truth at all. To simplify it down to a single variable like "genetic looks" is the dumbest oversimplification ever. And you're obviously missing the point of the comparison completely. The point is not to say junk food is good, or hot guys are bad. The point is that extracting all your data from a narrow source such as tinder or mcdonalds, and then draw a conclusion on the entire rest of the world from that narrow data is beyond ridicilous.
@@jarzez Personally I have watched many of Wheat Waffles videos and he touches on more than just tinder data and even reccomends that if you are not extremely good looking to rely on other forms of dating because tinder is extremely looks based, and while real life is looks based you have a better chance in real life due to the other factors at play.
@@ThahnG413 What you said is entirely beside the point. As @Jackbob said, the point is that taking results from experiments with a heavy sampling bias is a reliable way to get the wrong answer. The analogy is meant to illustrate the flaw in relying on such results. If it makes you happy let's reword the analogy to say "[...] people only ever want highly palattable foods". It addresses your comment because "highly palettable" is not thought of as inherently bad, but it's sure as hell more difficult to find foods that are when you've also specified constraints like "high fiber", "high in micronutrients", "low sugars". Similarly, sure "rich" and "hot" aren't inherently bad, but if you also choose to specify "down to earth", "empathetic", "can face tough challenges and survive", or whatever else, it's going to get harder. At the very least it's harder simply because the more specific you are about the kind of person, the less and less of that kind of person exists. But then there's also the argument to be made that those attributes of "rich" and "hot" lending themselves to seeing the world and operating in it in a certain way that doesn't lend itself to other desirable traits.
Personally the black pill community improved my life, because of it i always strive to be a better version of myself physically. Unfortunately some people use black pill knowledge to feed their negative emotions; be depressed about it and do absolutely nothing to fix it just rant and complain. Theres nothing wrong with black pill knowledge, its how you use it. I genuinely think it provides actual solutions to problems.
What if I get out of the blackpill? I still can't get a women to love me but I'm a little bit more happy? Nah f*ck that, I'll rather face the truth that I'm not enough in this day and age than delude myself.
That thinking is blackpilled. If someone only wants you for your looks then they don't love you, I have the minset that not fitting beauty stardards kinda works to my advantage because I know people like me for me. Work on personal growth and I'm sure you will find good people to surround yourself with (romantically or not)
Than actually accept your belief, stop talking about it, and move on but it seems like you don’t want to improve your mindset, you just want to wallow in misery and grief because you have no higher calling?
Good point. Every time I start to fall into any of these terminally online beliefs like lookism, Black Pill, etc., I just go to my local Walmart and witness people of all shapes, sizes, and appearances paired up and seemingly content.
@@flangeinspector9959 and then you wake up. And realise that there are other factors. I.e. that 4/10 man with 8/10 woman. She leads the relationship. She has the final word. He pays for everything. In particularly bad cases, it's an "open relationship" (for her). Because she made a compromise and must gain something for it. Simple human nature.
Bro black pill literally just is a nihilistic view about the world and dating. He engaged with these ideas like hundreds of times and the problem with it is that it is an echo chamber. Therefore the echo chamber is a big part of the problem also the guy in the post asked how to get out of the echo chamber. He dismisses the idea because it's not helping anyone. All you do is keeping it in feeling sorry for yourself and hopeless instead of trying to change your actions.
@@renmei99 there is no such thing as a black pill study lil bro bro 💀 Like I said this video is addressing the guy who doesn't want to be in an echo chamber so it makes sense that he is talking about that. If you want to have specific videos on core ideologies of the black pill you can watch besically every Dr. K video about feeling meaninglessness, hopelessness, emptyness or trouble with dating, dealing with nihilism etc because these topics got coverd in mass already. If you watch them with an open mind and try what he says instead of going in with a conformation bias maybe you can understand what he's saying more. The world isn't black or white, people have different preferences in dating and that your perspective on life plays a huge roll in how happy you are with it and how meaningful it seems to you.
Going outside to see that women date below average men is bad argument. You're talking about all age range of ppl, but it doesn't work like that. Boomers, people of previous generations were not expose to internet, tiktok, dating apps - basically globalized dating market. We need to take into consideration the age range of young ppl from this new digital generation. Now here is my experience, as a center Europe citizen.. When I go outside I see younger generation women mostly, like 95% (not all, but exception to the rule doesn't make the rule) with men above average of height in my country which is 178 cm, and full head of hair, when it comes to face it's mostly average, above average, even sometimes below. So we see a certain regularity here, height is highly demanded feature - new options served to women through the internet etc. make them choose better genetics because they just can, and also they can provide financially to themselves so they don't need to compromise with looks because they need men to take care of them anymore, which is also a factor nowadays.
@@Keroloth92 not much more than 50 percent of women cares about height in real life. And if you are not above average in looks, just try to know women at your university, work, hobby, etc., mainly the ones who aren't on dating apps or insta (with a little practice it can be said in large percentage from a girl at first sight).
Please, this "negative cycle" is cycling back always to experience men have, there would be no black pill if men were not treated like crap if they are too short or not looking like a model.
You realize Santa was real and it was just your dad going to Walmart, right? It's a great analogy honestly. Because you think this is some impossible magic after becoming fixated on a comforting narrative that blinds you to what is in reality a pretty straightforward situation that you could definitely navigate yourself if you got past the narrative fixation.
Its easier to talk about solving a problem than it is to actually enact those talked out solutions and to do them. So even though you maybe can't help yourself, you almost certainly can talk it out with other people having the same problems, especially if there are six other people there talking it out too. And if you then help push them to do it together. And then you get the same treatment from then.
@@Balloonbot Also he says that the statement is false but his argument for it is that we don't only see couples of handsome men and a woman. No shit sherlock it's because women have to settle at some point or they'll become lonely cat women. Some of them do become lonely cat women but others prefer to chose a guy that is average and earns enough money or simps for her. If you were to look at these couples you see in the supermarket, you'd notice that a bunch of them consist of men that simp for the woman. But the woman can literally get another guy if she wants and sometimes does, if her needs ain't met.
@@chromedreamer1237 Exactly my thoughts. Dr. K just ignores the fact of women settling down calculatingly. I think it's better to not be in a relationship at all than to not be desired truly.
@@chromedreamer1237 When is that point? I don't know about you, but at my uni there are plenty of girls between 18 and 20 that are not in relationships with 10/10 Chad's or whatever, but normal guys.
The thing has become ideological, people started to believe in the pills pretty much like political ideas and it is sad and dangerous for themselves. I've been a radical political activist on the internet for a certain period before and I see now how bad it was, how much gymnastics I would do to defend my points and how angry and upset that would make me. I was certain I was soooo right. It all made so much sense. I used to think it was all logical argumentation and facts while in reality I was just an extremely biased activist. At least that ideology didn't include a hopeless believe about myself and the world. The "solid and dark truths" about the world might not be as solid or as truthful as we believe. Edit: My sources of information about the subject were mainly 2 or 3 RU-vid channels and any articles and external references were filtered by these channels too. I also participated in some groups that shared the same ideology. Only after I went to University that I started to see things and sides other than the ones I was seeing before and now I'm aware that I'm way more ignorant about the subject than I thought I was.
100%! There's a comfort in feeling right, even if its painful. I mean if science says i'll categorically never find a partner, then why go out and try right?
@@Balloonbot there’s actually comfort in hope. If the hope is taken away with hard evidence which proves the opposite of what you truly want, the only way left is cope or rope
Looks matters the most! 100% not even scientifically proven also anecdotal. Woman and men do look first on appearance, I know a guy who has a very obvious tick but because he's very handsome he litterally said he gets a new woman every 2 days
Your premise circle seems brittle, narrow and risk averted at simple glance, and hasn't yet to be conclusively tested concretely, best of you to find all of the ways this goes wrong, goes well but goes bad long-term, and so on. You can't sink yourself in "truth" to feel better on the despndency's swamp.
I noticed at some point that when analyzing in retrospect my arguments from a previous fight where I was angry, I realized I wasn't completely logical, and it was very hard to defend my initial position from an objective standpoint. That's why I'm consciously backing out from conversations where I feel myself getting angry, just taking a step back or a pause to re-evaluate the situation. The main trigger for anger, that I see in my colleagues as well, is the assumtion of negative intent from the other party; here I find the following Hanlon's razor: "Never attribute to malice that which is adequately explained by stupidity.". When someone affects my work by not doing theirs, or creates effort for my team, or even does something harmful, first I try to eliminate the possibility of stupidity before diving into the possibility of bad intent. Thisd allows me to address the initial situation with more a more calm and objective view.
I personally think this isn’t an issue. It’s an asset. Take it from someone who suffered immensely in life being taken advantage of, lied and manipulated. Because i wasn’t attractive enough. Now, I am a proud antisocial, manipulative person who does all they can (legally) to take as much from someone without giving them a crumb. It’s been life changing being the one who hurts someone. And for those of you who tell me to think of the ones I’m hurting? Well, no one gave a flying f*ck about me when it was being done. Why should I care?
Lmao, actual psycho mentality. I'm sure you've taken revenge on the people who have wronged you and didn't just reflect the abuse you've suffered onto innocent people around you. You all like to pretend like you've had it worse than everybody else and that you are special, that nobody would get you and your surface level thinking. You sound pretty depressed bud, maybe you should change your ways
You will still have gas problems whether you are in the room or not. You are getting away not because of your own gas problems but because the room itself is toxic and has no solutions, only misery. You will have a much easier time at fixing your problems in fresh air than in a toxic environment like that. It is like trying to get in shape but everyday you go to an ice cream shop with your friends and they want you to eat with them. You want to get better but you are putting yourself in a situation where you are surrounded by people with goals are the exact opposite of your own. While it is not impossible to get in shape in that situation, going there all the time isn't helping and might even be making things worse. Not going to the shop anymore isn't running away from your problems. You are actually taking steps to fix your problems.
4:38 This arguent is false, because that was pre-internet era and most people matched throught their social circle. Females picked from 20 males around them max. Now with internet females can pick and chose from 1000s of men.
Well, one thing's for sure, we're going to see about 40 percent women single and childless within the next decade. The only way to account for this is that women are being super-picky.
The real hard honest truth is you make the best of the cards your dealt with in life. While some people have everything others have nothing. It's best to focus on what you do have then what you don't. What is dangerous is living a life expecting things to happen. False hope. Much better to be a realist than a fantasist. Since becoming MGTOW my life has improved for the better. I'm learning to make peace with being alone and finding acceptance. It's rather refreshing to be free of centuries old social constructs like relationshipd, marriage and kids. Focus on yourself!
The problem isn't expecting things to happen, the problem is being entitled and not doing anything to make things happen. Like you say, you make the best of the cards you're dealt with in life, but you have to actually play them. Right now I'm a neet and spend most of my time at home. I can't expect women to just show up at my doorstep to propose to me. So I have two options; I can decide all women only want chad and become a MGTOW like yourself, or i can go outside and actually try to meet new people. Right now I'm trying to get a job and figure out what I want to study next year, both because it's something to do, and because it leads to meeting a lot of new people. Doing something like this, as well as working on yourself to be the best person you can be, you still can't be entitled enough to expect to instantly find a romantic partner. Finding a partner takes a lot of time, effort and luck, but you can do more to make it happen than you think. And you have to do it yourself.
@@doofus_dummy @ I'll admit I much prefer to put the time and effort into things with a more positive result. I don't regard dating and relationships as worth the effort nowadays. I only have so many free hours in the average day (outside work) to myself and I don't want to waste a moment of them. Time is precious the older you get! I would much prefer to spend that time pursuing my hobbies and interests, reading a good book or watching a thought provoking documentary. All better uses of my time than having to endure the drivel most people talk about. As for going out. I go out nearly 365 days of the year and socialize with many people from all walks of life. If I had to choose however between doing activities with people or alone I would choose the latter.
He is quite a smart guy, but the fact anyone thinks this guy has any clue about the state of modern dating is laughably stupid. Hell, even some of his assertions are absurd. If a RU-vid video links multiple studies that information does not just become invalid because it was presented through RU-vid. Of course the video may mischaracterize the study, but that is why you check the sources. Of course more than looks matter, but the fact stands that increasing amounts of men are unable to find a partner and female standards are rising to the sky due to online dating.
Look up the other videos, its just gaslighting. He knows the current societal problems around dating, yet he purposely dismisses or ignores them while pinning fault on an individual's state of mind, which is in itself a product of current issues.
Yeh, dont know what this dude is talking about. If youre a man, the only way out is be finance. And that "out" is not real, you'll lose it once you run out of money.
Bro made a 52 minute video breaking down how we process emotions and literally explaining why Blackpill ‘evidence’ is largely influenced by the desire to believe it and you just proved his point lmfao
@@theultrak641Does that make the evidence fake? Let's pressure all these people really want to believe it ony bc of their bad experiences, is it any less true? You haven't disproved shit you have only said that people who experience it are more likely to belive it, but that doesn't mean is not fake, how hard is this to understand?
@@QWERTY-gp8fd so why do you give us advice to improve ourselves when you clearly didnt. your wife earns more than you and you are ugly (your own words). ??
You can't Untake the blackpill, it's true that consuming depressing content isn't the best, in fact what you should do is: 1) learn about the blackpill 2) see if it's proven true in the small environment you are part of 3) acknowledge it describes reality pretty well in 99% of the cases (there are always some exceptions) 4) keep living your life, and if you are a sub5, well don't give up but keep in mind you will probably never experience love or attraction from any woman. 5) if you are a normie and above, well you gotta know it's getting harder, so looksmax and do as best as you can Oh and 6) if you are chad, well, you already won, the blackpill is only going to let you know that no matter how dumb you act you will always be the prime making choice, cause mother nature said so
If you're truly too short and ugly and ND to date, then the vest option isn't to keep trying but to abandon trad dating for an alternative lifestyle. To keep trying is just to keep losing the game. Play a different game.
yeah, I think I kinda get that some men use black pill to rationalize their pain as copium. But I don't know why remembering the whole blac k pill thing is relevant. Idk, I just see how it destroys confidence. And I would 100% say that confidence beats looks (and yes, I understand how good looks give a huge confidence push, but it alone won't be long lasting). An insecure chad will tire eventually.
@@quintboredom Confidence doesn't beat looks. The Elephant Man or Qusimodo could be as confident as you like and it wouldn't make a difference except have them seen arrogant or creepy. Remember, looks influence how your behaviour is seen (halo effect). Confidence when ugly appears to be overconfidence and egotism, nervousness when attractive is interpreted as cute or nerdy introversion that requires the girls 'help' to bring him 'out of his shell'. Confidence is an essential aspect of dating success ... IF you're average looking. If you're genuinely short or ugly it's no use.
@@someonesomeone25 yeah, I guess you're right in extreme cases, though I would still argue that confidence (or a more attuned sense of self-esteem) can indeed help most men, along with some tweaking in physical looks. And I agree with the arrogance thing, but I do believe that if you're truly confident, you'll just be you even if people think ill of you, and if anyone sticks around (and since being confident could also help you not close up to people out of fear, someone might). I mean, ugly people have had relationships since forever, so idk
Not gonna lie the Blackpill actually improved my confidence a lot. Especially if I find a girl I really like I can always cold approach by simply introducing myself relying on my looks to do the work instead of having to think about these random pickup lines.
@@Milkbutter That’s not ALL it takes. But it is required. Necessary but not sufficient. Unless you’re willing to settle for some fat, desperate single mom or something
Got here sort of by accident but I leave with a whole new perspective on what I'm going through right now, even if it's not really related with the black-pill thing. Really nice work you are doing here, man.
You cannot unsee truth. Too many people think the truth is good things that make you feel good, but sometimes the truth is uncomfortable. If you're not tall and good looking, you will struggle in an increasingly superficial world. If you're short and under a certain looks threshold or even of a certain race today, you are: -much less likely to be selected by women -less likely to be hired -less likely to be promoted -more likely to be depressed -at higher risk of ending yourself You can point to some studies and argue that they're flawed, but all of them? At some point you need to recognize when you're trying to cope with the truth just because it goes against your sensibilities.
@@twelvecatsinatrenchcoat ya these guys are just a bunch of weak minded men ..I have seen many not good looking people totally breaking at their fields I participated in chess, swimming,music , classical dance and a whole lot of other quiz and people from all walks of life and looks come there and I have seen them ...these guys really have very limited life experience for some unfortunate reasons and now they are trying to justify with random bullshit
This has been known for decades, racial discrimination, heightism, and lookism are not new concepts. No one including Dr. K is arguing that looks don’t matter, but the problem is the nihilistic and fatalistic black pill approach to life and dating. Yes all those things matter, but if you struggle with those things does that mean your life is over? Does it benefit you any way to dwell and despair over things you cannot change? How about acknowledging the truth and then moving forward and doing the best you can with what you got? Because the black pill is pretty lax on this, it focuses more on deterministic factors without any tangible way out other than “looksmaxxing” which has its limits.
But, in the zoomers generation in my area there are literally only couples where the dude is about 2m, and second point, the couples where the parents are average, those are gen x, thats an outdated system/scenario. I'm not suddenly starting to believe WheatWaffles, I'm getting a lot of confirmation from him and the audience, about similar experiences from life. The Tinder thing, exactly, people didn't have it, they were reduced to meeting average people in their area and that was it, they had to settle, now that we have the internet, human nature goes wild. As an average dude, you will be compared with handsome dudes from the entire continent.
you will never be happy if you keep looking for the best things and uphold yourself to the highest standard. Comparison just makes you feel shit bro. And sometimes you are the best and people look up to you and you don't realize it. You have to be content with who you are in the present, so you can improve yourself slowly. Even if you get the best babe and you still compare her to the other bester babes you're still going to be unhappy with your best babe.
@@mobilenotherwise5000 That is all true, but I was always the depression type, even when I maxed out jobwise and gymwise (I am still in the best shape of my life) and even if start chillin, people remind me how inferior I am, like my family, when it comes to average height for example, and my cousins are all 6.4
@@digitally_ascended_conscio6304 Just know that I full support you and I understand your point, the only dudes I have seen that are shorter than 6ft3 and have success with women have always been men with good looking faces and nice body. In my country only these guys and 6ft3+ have girlfriends, everybody else is wandering around single.
6:29 "For thousands of years people have been forming relationships without Tinder." True, but I don't see how that's relevant. For thousands of years people have been traveling by horseback. Past performance is not indicative of future results. Decentralization of the Sexual marketplace is new; never before experienced in the history of mankind. We are the Guinea pig generation. I don't know man. Very interesting time to be alive. I don't want to be blackpilled.
only 15% of american 18-29 year olds used tinder in 2020. tinder is a game, and while i ended up meeting my gf of 3 years who i live with from there, i would say that tinder relationships dont develop in a way that naturally occuring relationships do. also just making your profile stand out from the rest improves your matches a lot
@@kipkipper-lg9vl you're coping hard, unless you're actually morbidly obese or ridiculously bad looking due to a birth defect etc you will find someone through tinder if you actually learn to play the gane right.
@topy706 death is truly the only way out but that's not socially acceptable. Just like telling the truth about life and human nature isn't socially acceptable.
Im brown pill. The blackpill definitely has a lot of truths to it, but they’re typically so extreme to the point where it’s dehumanizing. Yes, your looks will effect how you’re treated but looks are only one component to a person
blackpill acts like you get bullied for looks n sh,it. which is not true and that only applies in school. looks only matter in getting in bed with woman. looks dont matter in employment generally successful life. if employer discriminate my salary based on my looks then i would sue and win. thats how it works generally everywhere in the world. coming from a sub 5 manlet who has successful single life.@@laptopstudy3279
I wouldn't call myself good looking but I had a lot of attention from women. I used to be a black pill for a long time, and the fact that I was getting that much attention would always shock me. So, I think it is not the most important thing. I had an experience with a 10/10, everything was going smoothly in instagram (she saw my face and complimented my looks) but when we actually meet up, it went terrible. There were no vibes, we didn't connect, and I didn't even want to continue with her anymore. What I want to say is, yes, looks do matter, but not as much as your ability to connect with people and create meaningful relationships.
But isn't this video also proving the point of Black Pill?? Because Black Pill is a brutal truth that is hard for people to take so you untake it if you can't handle it, so this video kinda does sounds like cope.
@@andreighibolariu1580 the black pill is one of the most delusional ideologies out there. The shit being presented there has a tiny bit of truth, but its overshadowed by the amount of overgeneralizations and exaggerations made by people who've clearly never spoken to a woman in their life. Keep following this defeatist outlook on life tho, see where that gets you.
take the blackpill, and improve on what you can, actually from a poll from wheatwaffles around 90 percent of people who watch blackpill content are willingly eager to improve on themselves from a more challenged dating era, and also just an era of inflated standards, so most of the do process their emotions and learn how to improve their lives with blackpill information
@@DusBeforeDawn2008 it’s not. But I highly encourage you to walk up to a random stranger at a grocery store, park, coffee shop, church, etc etc , and try to strike a conversation. Let me know how it goes when they call the police on you or the store manager asks you to leave and not come back. The only place one can approach people without judgement is…online dating. Or bars.
Really good video man. I'm glad you're taking the time to address these things because it seems like a lot of people are struggling with it and there's a lot of people out there giving really bad advice
I am to quite agree with his take about Wheat Waffles. First question: How many of his videos he has watched? Second question: Does Dr. K realize that nearly all wheat waffles' points about black pill are supported with science? I mean like real scientific papers and other findings. I haven't heard any rebuttals to specific arguments, just answers to the points Dr. asked himself.
I literally watched 3 of his videos and had to stop (even though it's not even targeted at me lmao) because even though a lot of it isn't necessarily wrong, it's SO negative and damaging.
You can’t just consciously choose to stop believing in your beliefs Even if your beliefs are harmful, if you GENUINELY think they’re true, than any attempt to change them through normal means will only be insulting and doomed to failure You need to actually defeat these beliefs in a 100% logical, rigorous way while actively listening to and addressing their objections to what you say
All this for me is mind blowing. It isn’t talked in the media in my country (not that I searched much - I just don’t see anyone talking about any of this). So this all seem kind of alien to me. I went and searched the RU-vid cited, and it felt even weirder, these community seems to have their own slangs, I can’t even understand some comments on those videos. What a social phenomenon! What is going on with society, I wonder.
The author of this video is completely clueless, the B.lackpill is simply the truth on how male-female intimate relationships work, and that is vvomen do by LOOKS first. Rubbish video, thumbs down from me.
Bp suffers from bad publicity. The people delving into bp do not truly understand it at all. That's what makes other people watching bp content hate it. Bp is not presented in its true form to "normies". There are some channels who do that but usually this is not the case. Wheat waffles is not a good blackpill channel sadly most people who hate the bp get their info off of him too.
@@wallahhabibiiiiagreed I knew wheat waffles wasn’t the best blackpill channel when tails’s “incel” mogged wheat waffles “giga Chad” wheat waffles doesn’t understand the female gaze.
