Understanding Love in Marriage // Before I Do - Stephanie Ike Okafor 

If you are not yet married, please I beg you to listen to the truth being shared in this series. I promise you, it will save you so much unnecessary pain and tears. Don't lean on your own understanding, when you're in love you think you know best, lean on the truth, not your feelings. I am a living witness. But for those of us already married, there is hope, we just have to learn the right way, and cling on to God for deliverance and restoration. God can heal and redeem your marriage. Thank you Pastor Stephanie for this teaching.

Pastor Stephanie is a low key comedian 😂 I enjoy her little quips here and there.

PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE listen to the guidance given here in this series. I cannot express this enough. I don't think you all REEAAAAALLLY understand how much of a GIFT God is placing before your eyes and ears to hear and see this. This is not something that is taught by many churches. I didn't get this and I was in the church. I would have LOOOOVED some real talk about marriage, and what to do in the waiting time...even through courting. Lord Have Mercy!!! Holy Spirit I pray over every single person watching this that you will implant this encouraging word into their hearts. Help them to continue to seek out wise council. Bring someone into their path who truly reflects the image of Christ. Help them to also know that receiving council does not stop once the "I Do" has been said. It continues throughout the marriage. Let not the enemy steal their attention from what is being said. Oh how I pray they will GRASP it with all their heart. I pray for spiritually healthy and strong marriages in Christ Jesus. Amen

My new favorite line is “You can’t marry on chemicals!”

Not looking at your partner like your next meal!! Lol preach to us!!!!😂😂

Lord I pray your covering over Pastor Stephanie and her husband. Always bless and protect their union, family, ministry, and all you have them do and every where they go, in Jesus name. Amen

This series is helping me sooooo much as a single woman in Christ who desires a healthy kingdom marriage. Thank you, Pastor Stephanie 🙏🏾

This is my series. I will marry right in the name of Jesus. I will not be unequally yoked. I will have kingdom marriage in Jesus name Amen.

“Your words may sound like a trigger to them but the Holy will convict them when you pray for them “ I’m learning and preparing my myself for union soon.

You’re so anointed for this series, Pastor Stephanie; it will be a reference for millions of what it means to be married. Truly a blessing to this generation. 🙏🏽

And look good for your wife. I'm 100% in agreement with women keeping themselves up, but we put so much emphasis and pressure on women to do this. Men, keep yourself looking nice!

This series is something I prayed for pastor. I felt alone in marriage so I asked our Lord to reveal what marriage is truly about because I was going through an unhappy moment with my spouse, unhappy years should I say. Over here believing that love should be similar to what movies show, stupid right? Hey, well I was a firm believer that love should be that way and if it's not then you're not with the right person. Anyhow, that was just me being deceived. We have no one around us that is married and follows Christ so of course we only received the "just get divorced" advice which I know not to take, especially because those people giving the advice do not know the word. I am beginning to understand that as long as I play my part in obedience to Christ and I pray for my husband to do the same and for him in general, the fruit of happiness will come. Although I need to remember this in moments of tests 😂😂The scriptures have shown me how to love my husband, be a proverbs 31 woman and how to live life ALIVE in Christ. The enemy has tried so hard to take us down but it just won't happen in Jesus' name! I know God has good plans for us to prosper for His glory. I can't wait to see 😎Thank you sister and I will be praying for you and for protection over your marriage 💕

As MUCH as I absolutely adore Stephanie and how much anointing she has on her life, I really was hesitant about this series.. it was only because I felt that giving marriage advice sooooo early into being married was a bit like people giving parenting advice who only have a toddler. Who haven’t went through the vast, varying stages of parenting there is. BUT GIRL! The way she breaks down marriage in a way that doesn’t come off as being a “know it all” or someone that feels like soon as they “arrive” they can judge or tell everyone else what to doin this area - MAN! And I mean that like she presents it so factually that it comes across as being so biblically sound that as long as you know God, abide in Him, understand his word and what it says about marriage - you can share this knowledge with the world! Even in its early stages. She is so anointed in how she speaks that I feel like I’m listening to a great friend who possesses a wisdom ordained by God

I am so excited to listen to this series!!! I’ll be 12 years married on 5/26 🙏🙏🙏🙏

Woooow😇 Thank you Pastor Steph…I honestly think this series should be renamed to “Before&After I do” because wow me & my wife we are getting that Godly marriage counselling we urgently need. We never got before we said “I do”. ❤

I am loving this series Stephanie, thank you so much. I am newly saved by Jesus and have been celibate for 2.5 years. I’m saving myself for my husband. This is helping me be aware of what sort of husband I should be waiting for. ❤

Thank you so much for your teachings on marriage Pastor Stephanie. I'm not yet married, but have been praying for a kingdom marriage. I pray I am ready when I meet my husband 🙏🏻 ❤ God bless you 🙏🏻 ❤

Marriage is for the Mature👏

“Understanding will save you so much internal negative dialogue” 👏🏽 👏🏽 love this

Marriage is a journey, not an event.💯

"Submission is beauty" - 🔥🔥🔥

I am so happy this series started when I am not married causeeeeeee......the gemsssszzzzzzz 💎 💎

Yes Pastor, women are turned on by stability, yes, financially is key because if he can't take care of , sustain, or provide for his family, thge Bible says that he is worse than an unbeliever. Yes, emotional stability is very important. Thank you for sharing all these, it came right on time. ❤❤❤

Yes to safety and stability!!!! I have realized that is a complete non-negotiable for me.

I am so excited to have the opportunity to listen to this series as I wait on God for marriage. Thank you, Stephanie!

Im 56 yrs old now, got saved at the age of 27. The first worship music I heard was Don Moen. I use your music in my House meetings. I was recently in hospital for 8 days with Covid. It was rough. My lungs were infected and my blood was clotting. It was the hardest eight days of my life. I woke early each morning and worshipped God, many of your worship songs came to me. God was with me every day until I got over. Thank you for your dedication and devotion, you have blessed so many. God bless you.

A woman submission is her beauty...👸💝

I am married to an unbeliever'n after I fully submitted myself to the Lord I have been desiring for someone to talk about marriage with unbeliever. I can't wait for that series

this needs to be embedded in pre-marital counseling classes!!!!

I’ll come back after 10 years and say thank you Pastor Stephanie❤️

There’s a lot of wisdom shared here and I pray people have ears to hear

Thank u Pastor Ike Okafor be bless in all ur ways from Rwanda/Uganda

Amen!!! Safety is one of my main husband prayers. The way that I put it, I want to be able to take a nap, sleep in peace, and wake knowing everything is better than okay.💯🕊💞

Spot on! I am “turned on” by stability, safety, and security. Well said Stephanie as a woman I 100% agree. An emotional safety is key! 🙌

I cannot thank God enough for all this information about marriage. Thank you Pastor Steph, your teachings are really saving lives 🙏🙏 luv you ❤❤❤

THE HOMEWORK IS TO WRITE A SERVE LIST ON HOW WE WOULD LIKE TO SERVE OUR SPOUSES

This is on point! Since giving my life to Christ and going all in for Jesus, I’ve been more soft and can easily submit. I’m not married yet, but I see how being in the world makes it easier to be the independent and in charge woman; but when you are truly in God’s will as a woman, it’s like the submission part just happens!! Praise God

Idk who edits your videos, but visually it looks great and you and your team (if you have one) did a great job.

This is so profound 🙌🏽💙🤍

Loving this series so far. TBH some of the information can be applied to relationships with family and friends too. I do think it is key to talk to couples who have been married for years. I talk to my older sister and her husband a lot about marriage. One thing my brother in law said was he had to let go of his ego and pride. He could either keep fighting with my sister or learn how to compromise and work with her. It was a struggle until he came to this conclusion. He realized she needed to feel like she was in control of things so, he let her feel that and stopped fighting her on it who was right or wrong. My sister is an anxious person and he realized that so submitting to her was allowing her to feel in control to relive her stress and anxiety which also brought him peace in the end.

@PastorSteph I'm just blessed to have come across one of your shorts videos and since then I've been stuck on your messages. I'm not married but I live with my husband (in quote) with our 2 kids (twin). I wish I knew half of what you've shared before I thought in myself I'll like for us to have kids. I guess for me I lacked the truth about marriage, was raised by a single mum, she did a great job providing for us, though we didn't have much of the mother to children friendship you spoke about I guess cos she was taking the responsibility of two over 6 children resulted to that, she's the most hardworking woman I know so I learned to observe and learn, never had the opportunity to seat and have dialogue about life. I should have had a chance at learning in church but I guess I was too distracted. I thought my hardwork was enough that i wont need to depend on him or have expectations from him but after I gave birth to my twins I realised there are so many things I can no longer do for myself. And it been chaos, I can see my self changed over the space of 2 years. I knew I had made a great mistake but never knew I was, the whole thing caught me unguarded and I've had a very good share of it reality. I Miss me and my relationship with God, I most times feel stuck, my family and his already perceive us as married even though nothing had been done. I never want my kids to grow without a father figure like I did, but I'm yet to be able to choose what is good for me and what is good for them, is it is God's will for me to leave or is my leaving genuine or cos now I have a better understanding and sees him as he is? Nevertheless I've commuted my life to the one who first reached out to me and showed me how much he loves me and really care yet I choose folly, but I know He'll sort me out in the end. BUT I'm grateful I'm knowing this now and my children won't be ignorant. You know I asked my mum y she never spoke to me about how marriage really is but I'm grateful I met you. Thank you Pastor Stephanie and yes my birthday is Sept 8 like your spiritual fathers. Love from Nigeria

Amen Pastor Stephanie! This message was definitely for me. Especially when you mentioned that men need a break. Every word slapped me in my face. Thank you Lord for speaking to me through Pastor Stephanie. This is preparing me for marriage and showing me where I have fell all the way short in my last relationship which could have led me down the aisle.

Lovely video! My husband is the same way, calling me beautiful even when I don't feel like I look my best. In the morning, he turns over, sees me in my pajamas and fluffy robe, and calls me gorgeous with the most charming smile on his face. 😊🤍

Thank you for this series pastor Stephanie. It’s definitely blessing me! I think the part about safety and being surrendered made so much sense when you broke it down. Thank you sooo much for this. I desire marriage as a single woman yet I had no one to learn from. God is using this series to prepare me for my husband when the wait is over! ❤

So much blessed by this as a single woman waiting in a God for a Godly kingdom marriage ❤️,so blessed 😁.thank you pastor Stephanie for obeying God's word about this series 😁😁😁😁

God knows how long my spirit yearn for this. 😊

Thank you Stephanie for this. This is really illuminating and Spirit filled. May God give us all Godly spouses for kingdom purposes.

Ayeeee to the Shanaynay reference andddd the I-N-D-E-P-E.. reference haha I love it 😅 #iykyk but we’re sooo close in age which I think really helps me relate to your messages so well! I’ve been through a few failed relationships and situationships and just recently (May 15th) I decided to stop having sex, cut off the situationships & focus on God and my purpose. I’m also clingy lol I’m such a lover girl and I know one day God will send me my husband. I turn 34 July 15th and have decided to get baptized again, (I got baptized when I was younger but I’ve been leaning more into God lately so now that I’m older and truly understand the meaning behind it, I’m doing it again) Sunday, July 14th which is the day right before my 34th bday. Please keep going Queen, you are such an inspiration to me and many others. So happy I came across you! 💕✨🙏🏽💕✨🙏🏽

Wow pastor Stephanie…a serve list? 🤯 never thought about that thank you so much for this series ❤

Stephanie, I enjoy so much listening to you deliver what Father God places in your heart to share. You are a wonderful blessing to this world. 🙏 Stephanie you are such an encouragement , to seek Father God in every area of our lives, because He loves us. I hold on to that love , because I love him and want to please Him. 🙏 Thank you Stephanie 🙏❤

A direct word to me! Sooooooooo many gems to take away! On repeat!

I am receiving so much wisdom from this and feel highly favored by God that i'm learning all this while single. I pray that this information helps me embark on a healthy marriage journey someday.

I am really enjoying this series! Im not yet a wife but im preparing to be one. I feel this series will save me a lot of heartache

This series is so incredible. Thank you Pastor Stephanie ❤

I love how God has given u the gift to verbalize the very essence of whatever His messages are. I’ve been watching you for a year now and your messages have blessed me. You give me a Godly perspective that I had not considered, like submission. Keep these messages and series going!

Hallelujah so good and true. Thank you Lord! God bless you and your family Stephanie blessings!🙏🏼

Thank you for this series Pastor, God bless you. I have and still learning a lot as a woman who desire to be married.

This is so good! Thank you for this series. I cannot wait to hear the rest. The best thing about this is you’re a great teacher and you’re also hilarious. The Martin joke 13:00 😂

I’m so thankful for understanding. Please be thankful for Prayer. Please ask the Holy Spirit to Encourage you and your spouse to be. Try to plan before you actually fall in love. Ask God to Prepare your heart and to Prepare the heart of your spouse to be. All this is just the start of planning for the counseling. Some people don’t trust counseling because it will show the weak areas of our Christian Journey before marriage. Please push this decision through and keep going to counseling. You will have more and more questions. Don’t fight the battle that belongs to God. You may not be mature enough for marriage. God Loves both of you. Be safe and healthy. Take your time, Jesus is your foundation. God Bless you both. Brenda Your Sister in Christ

I can't say how much I'm loving this series. Very profound and insightful...the kind of wisdom I need as I prepare for marriage. God bless you pastor Stephanie!!

Loving these series, Thanks Woman of God.

Thank you so much Pastor Steph!!! Really we are learning a lot. Words are not enough to describe how blessed we are by this series. We look forward to the next one each time. Am being blessed as i wait on marriage

This is really molding me and preparing me for a second chance at Marriage….thanks Pastor Stephanie❤

You're so real and relatable!

Yes 🙌🏼 I was waiting patiently for this❤

I never thought about a serve list. This is blessing me 🙌🏽

These episodes are a literal Gem 💎

Soooo blessed by this series

I love this series. Thank you, Stephanie.

Thank you for these truths Pastor Steph.

Wow I'm blessed as always by this teaching

So so loved this😍😍😍. I can’t wait for the next one

Thank you I have been seeing all these series and I feel that has helping me to see marriage the expectations the necessary skills that we need to have and the emotional intelligence that we must have to have a successful marriage thanks

This series is really helpful to many of us.We thank God for you🙏

I so needed this !!!! I come from a family where they rush you into marriage and a lot of the marriages don’t last. Definitely have to know yourself first before getting married and get to know the other person.

Blessing me more than I can say! Thank you! Can’t wait for next week

You carry so much wisdom Steph, thank you for sharing the wisdom with us.

Anyone from Uganda here

My husband and I are newly weds and this series is blessing us immensely ❤

Thank you Stephanie ❤

Thank you for this series Pastor Stephanie, it truly is a blessing.❤

I’ve been following and this has been such a huge blessing to me God bless you Pastor Steph. Thank you for yielding and helping multitudes of people .

Thank you sooo much my favorite Pastor taking notes and learning thank you for such impact you are making on us

Thank God for this massage

Iam so grateful for this lesson 🙏

Thank God for this series, this will help bless many people. ❤

This blessed me so much. Thank you.

I’m loving this series… God bless you Pst. Stephanie ❤💐.

we are so blessed to be watching this!!❤️🥹

Thank you so much 🙏🏾 May God continue blessing you and your beautiful family 🎉

Thank you so much for this teaching. God bless you pastor.

My husband says that to me, he wants time alone, while we are in the house together. They just process things differently. We can be the focus of their thoughts and they want to see us win.

God bless you Pastor Steph!!!! I am learning and enjoying this! This is a blessing

I am blessed so far. Thank you for sharing ❤

whew! This really blessed me today! thanks so much Pastor Stephanie! Looking forward to next week!

You give me a lot of pieces of advice, pastor Stephanie. Thank you very much.

This is worth watching over and over and over again. Thank you pastor. God bless you

Pastor stephanie! Am glad to listen and hear this part about marriage: thank you so much ❤❤

“You don’t know what it’s Like to be with you!” That hit deep! One of the best series on marriage thus far! God bless you Pastor Stephanie ❤

So blessed by this series ❤❤