Unintentional ASMR 🏓 Very Thorough Table Tennis Racket Tester 

5:30 seriously what in the hell

@@mdsupreme1776 fr dude seems like something you’d take to chernobyl

Your comment had me crying of laughter. Thank you, good sir.

Maintaining integrity of the game as no price

A one point he refers to “the boys in the lab” like theres some underground james bond mi6 lab working on table tennis tech

I genuinely lol’d at this 😂😂😂

When he arrives in last minute “You think I’d miss this party?” “I never doubted you inspector. Give em hell”

Man this made me laugh. Cheers.

That would be an amazing anime

Lol!

I know, I was waiting for something bizarre to happen a la The Office.

I mean perfecting table tennis rackets is a bit silly of a job to have

how are mockumentaries not real life, lmao i get what you mean tho.

@@mothmanafterdark5924 You could say... that this job is a complete racket

@@cosmosDiv mockumentaries aren’t real life, that’s the whole point. Did you mix them up with documentaries?

The integrity of table tennis is at stake if these measures aren't taken.

It’s up there with climate change if you ask me

The only recourse for a well adjusted human adult

seems like he's doing well

dont forget about the gas that was coming off the rubber 😂

@@fromzero2hero-armwrestling359 screwed up his sense of balance, knocked him out cold, gave him a headache.

A truly noble goal. What a legend.

Bro...thanks for making me laugh lol

This made me lol

This makes me want me to set up a table outside a Table Tennis championship and just randomly do this, but totally make it up. "Now I must measure the taste of the paddle. Hmmm, very good, it is of a legal taste. The paddle must remain below the taste limit of "Delicious", anything "delicious" or higher is illegal, but you're paddle is only tasty, so it is legal. Now I must test how well it works as a spanking device, please bend over your chair for me"

LOL... like a way less cool Frank Abagnale, Jr.

I like to imagine this scenario is 100% true and he is being recorded in an asylum, the lady who brings in the racket is his doctor. There are three other doctors behind a two way mirror taking meticulous notes....

Haha warum hört sich jeder deutsche bei englisch so gleich an?

I knew it by the way he keeps talking about measuring and releasing gas in a room. Yes, that's what we all still think about when Germany joins the chat.

But he's Dutch

@@TRAVFLIX well then i'm gonna be dutch as well :D

@@TRAVFLIX Is that legal?

I read this right when they were at that part of the video on lost it hahaha

@@cooperlopez767 Glad to be of service haha

@@Beau74replying to a year old comment, nice 😎

@@b.jr.7816 What of it? It's a free country, dude.

@@Beau74assuming only americans use youtube because you have an uneducated egocentric world view, nice 😎

At Less that 4 mm

well done

1mm concave

They are very glossy, could blind you

but, the children aren't cause they ain't mine.

lmaoo

Me too bitch

I think its for a certification test or something. He's probably in training

@@bowlman_ Correction: he's the TRAINER. And very probably one of the world's leading experts in, uh, paddle validation.

@@NiceTryLaoChe that makes a lot more sense. I thought it was weird that someone would seem so calm during a test that probably determines their career

Lmaoooo I’m crying 🤣 he’s ready to pull out the Luger at any moment and point it at her head screaming if he finds anything illegal with the racket

Omg

HAHAHAHAHA. The comment section is gold already but THIS. Hahahaha 😂😂

😂😂😂

Consider for a moment the world a racket lives in - its a hostile one indeed. If an illegal racket were to scamper through your door right now would you offer it a saucer of your milk ? I thought not.

For now......

What a proper country

still not an excuse to be french...

The player is french, but by the name of the rubber manufacturer Yasaka, I'm guessing the whole racket is made in Japan.

He most likely is the only person doing this

Yeah wtf.. testing if the racquet releases gas?? Huh? 🤔🤔

@@Anonymous-sw5jx Making sure it doesnt have a nitrous tank

@@zed1323 Genuinelyy lmao

This legitimately looks like a Monty Python sketch, almost as if the humour is so dry that a firehose couldn't quench it.

Straight to jail.

He has to summon the handcuff inspector to make sure his set is match-legal though, before he arrests the offender.

He presses a button and little drones with guns shoot the offender and fly off to track down any associates

He uses the paddle on the rear end of the offender.

This comment section 😆

it's his job, he has probably seen all those codes thousands of times each. he better know the codes by heart

He probably wrote it himself

😂

YES! I think that’s why when I see a photographer in “the wild” I get triggers...

I’d swear the first 3 minutes I thought I was watching a Cohen Brothers film.

97

87

5

🤣

@@naumche1 😇 I hope you have a blessed day or night mate.

Best comment

Ahahahah real estate twins

If you are irl imma lmao

Same

This is the world of Warcraft warrior class instructor version. www.youtube.com/@konter4323/videos

You know it

Honestly, the world would be a better place.

@@khalidalamri6566The world is a better place, it's what you make it.

NEXT!

LMAO!!!

@@edrzl 😂

LOL

@@edrzl looool

🤣

Chief come on, like you were ever going to get it passed the Ping Pong Police. 🤔

I love this comment

Absolutely Beautiful! *Chef's kiss!*

People like you are why I still enjoy the internet :))

"I believe he doesnt care at all either." Him: It's all about the racket compliance, not about the fame.

"I do this everyday day so I'm probably right"

One for the emo kids: “The cutting is very good” (I was an emo kid in my teen years so I know what I’m talking about)

P

in the original video (this one is a repost) he actually appeared in the comment section explaining the origin of this video

This comment should be pinned! Also...why does the math and crime fiction not surprise me...

Where can I read his crime fiction stories?

@@fishticon8587 He writes under the pen name "Torsten von Wurlitz".

How can his stories be true stories if he’s writing fiction?

@@andromedaturnbull3512 Thanks. Unfortunately I can't read German, but it's kool to see him outside the ping pong room. I wonder if one of the stories is about a murder committed with a table tennis racket.

🤣😂😆

Bro this comment out of all got me dying 😂😂😂

This probably is the cause of the ASMR Aspect. On one Hand you root for the Bat, on the other you just love the Guy do his Job.

@@oglemonlarry6825 omg same! I bursted out laughing

i love that you’ve watched this many times

Yeaaa

Fr😂

I knew I wasn't the only one who enjoyed the original

Me too!😁

He did a great remake

😂😂

“…List of Rubbers.”…hmm?

I always have a hard time finding legal rubber for my thick wood. I don't play tabletennis...

Seriously! I’ve tried to describe this video to people and when I get to that part I just don’t even know what to say lol

daily reminder that "military grade" means "as cheap as possible without exploding in your hands"

Temporarily Unsighted

I can never let this happen to another person as long as I draw breath

Nah he kept looking at the 0,1 millimeter too low rubbersize of the ping pong paddle and his brain almost had a stroke so he had to stop playing

This is actually possible, iny team at the University a partner lost a game because the opponent used the light of the reflector on my friend's eye while serving, he didn't see where the white ball was going and lost the point.

"Unacceptable! No more! I will personally make sure."

There’s actually 10 special forces soldiers handpicked from their regiments, standing outside with AK-47s along with trip wires and claymores along the path and 6 K9’s ready to bite the hands off anyone who steps through that door unauthorised.

@@samconstantinou2335 you sound like a guy who has served in the racket security business before.

@@markmontana90 This kind of information is more top secret than government nuclear programmes!

​@@samconstantinou2335 How to make sure these men are trustworthy and not prone to corruption?

He likely approves them himself by an equally meticulous process

"Meanwhile, alligator populations have risen dramatically in the Wetlands of Louisiana ..."

@@schlockmeister754 "together we can stop this!"

"YOU TIRESOME BUFFOON. WE HAVEN'T THE TIME FOR PLAYERS TRYING TO SUBMIT ILLEGAL RACKETS." **Casts the player into the Shadow Realm**

👏

Wayooooooo

Eyoooooo

Ba dum tsshh

Omfg i cant believe I found you on this lmfao O'Reilly here!!!

Hahahahaha. The fumes were at a solid 4.1

you stole someone else's comment kemp10

😂😂

Professionals have standards

Same.

You can't block him. What's your shtoyle?

Same!! 😂😂

🤣🤣🤣

had a nice chuckle at that one :)

LOL

Thought he would start a test for cocaine.

I literally lol'd when he said this 😂😂

Those damn volatile organic compounds..... ✊✊

if anyone is curious it's because there are substances that players can (and very often do) use during the rubber gluing process that make the racket faster and better at imparting spin on the ball. this process is called boosting.

I spit out my volatile organic compounds reading this. Don’t worry. It was almost nothing

Finally the LARC is steeping up and enforcing proper rubber usage as well. Truly the crooks of table tennis must be quaking in their boots.

@@idkjustchangingmyname7343 I can't stop laughing 😄😄😄

Quite the racket they were running

It's like doping but for rackets

😂😂😂

She made the right ones

She’s got the ASMR glazed look

Stop your killing me hahahahaha

To be fair she was probably on her way home from work and they asked her to just go and see the man to get the 'racket checked' and it would only take a couple of minutes.... 😉

He actually has a Ph.D in mathematics and is the one who came up with this system. He is legitimately very passionate about it.

🤣🤣🤣

Always wondered what happened to John Wick after JW3

@@LDnP_ can’t wait for the 4th movie 🍿

He's like Adam Sandler from Don't Mess With the Zohan. Except cutting hair it's ping pong rackets

He’s found his zen.

That is the standard in precise measurement used in engineering and science, and is not specific to table tennis.

@@simpaticode Oh for sure, significant figures are important and consistent, I just think that the fact that they uphold a 4.04 thickness instead of a 4.00 one hilarious

Well if that shocks you, you must not have been around for The Turn of the Millennium Table Tennis Tournament in England, 1999, when Rodgar Oblevinsky used an illegal racket with a thickness of 4.06 to increase the power and distance of his shots ten fold. His accuracy and strength were unmatched, and his advantage caused him to burn holes in the tiny net in the middle of the table. Henceforth, racket thickness and net material are standardized. Nets are also commonly lubed up with Vaseline now before matches begin in order to avoid inflammatory friction. Table tennis might seem like a joke to some people, but I've seen spectators spontaneously combust during matches. Stay safe out there, friends.

What about 4.0499999999

@@zera2314 yeah!!! lube those nets you sick freak

Some people can't see the forest because the trees are in the way.

@@notshared4072 Some people don't care about cancer. It is what it is. At least he found something he likes.

Cancer is extremely complex. High intelligence isn't enough to create a cure.

@@RealRotkohl Well yeah. If it was that easy for genuises, we would have a cure by now.

@@noahraab2429 maybe the geniuses dont want to work for people like you to save their lives... how much do you worth for a genius?

He pulls a Luger out from under the table and brains her.

@@xwewillberememberedx crying rn

Zis isz unacceptable. Zee racquet is illegal, I vill conviscate zis racquet, you will leef un shame.

@@Thumper17 good to zee the Reich is doing vell, how'z my glass of juice coming?

@@Thumper17 Nah the dude is not german, sounds scandinavian, probably swedish.

this is from some kind of explanatory video they produced, its supposed to be filmed :D this is not a real situation bro

@@leo-dv7uh oh lord

I can measure you to a tenth of a millimetre and reject you if you are out of range for several exacting specifications. ...and God help you if you're too shiny.

Carefull what you wish for. They're called stalkers

do you have any examples of the content

The funny thing here is they probably would think we are also ESL if they hear our very midwest accents... ;)

Excellent description

It’s not ASMR but it’s definitely a thing for me anyway. Really cool to see someone describe it exactly.

@pana riello That's true. There are more German descendents in the Midwest than in any other US region. Here is a whole page regarding the history of German immigration in the US in case you're interested: en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/German_Americans

Thank you for this extremely specific gem of information

😂😂😂

LOL

"Illegal angle" you got me laughing out loud HAHAHA Have a great day Greetings from sweden 💖

I'd also safely assume it would be illegal at that distance from its original position.

I think he seems like a nice man. Polite. I could listen to him for hours. Have a good life ro everyone who reads this

I also hate bastards that have the arrogance to do simple calculations without assistance.

If I calculated that correctly in my head, both the racket and inspector would have gone red in the face but I suspect that it was just the racket, that time.

He's wrong tho, the average was 68

@@orvol It is 3.66 I think.

Had a laugh, good one. But would limit this to Central and North Europe. I don't see this in South or East Europe xD

Well said

Or wine and whisky

And tea 🫖☕️ lol

They did it off camera, as is tradition.

underrated comment

He tried to start an arguments bussiness, but unfortunely that job was already taken

😂❤

@@vixoxoaltf5188 yes dam lawyers

@@vixoxoaltf5188 no it wasn’t

Hahaha

I bet she actually thought this was it, at least hoped so

That's when things really started to kick up a notch... *Volatile Organic Compounds*

"No not even close"

there is a deep gang level gambling scene on legal table tennis racket checking.

Bah, table tennis is the best 🏓

Only entertaining bc of the lady's condescending and sarcastic attitude lmao

By the time the racket is ready, the tournament will be over

@Tylapaco 1997 i mean its really fun to play tho

lollll

GENIUS!!!!😂🤣😂🤣😂🤣😂🤣

Lmaoo

😂

"But, it was completely legal"

he would disasemble the car to the last bolt to check true mileage.

@@bojanmilovanovic747 this is not the original washer on the spare tire retention bolt!

He'll measure everything

Wait a minute, your car has gotten 0.12mm lower then before, this is legal though as the suspension wears out after a while.

Car looks nice. You wouldn't mind if I bring my friend Ray along to assist my inspection?

If the process of following the guidelines is ironically entertaining, what did the process of creating the rules look like?

Is it all tournament legal?

Oh my god you're right 😂😂😂 the fast paced shot changes, the subtly shaky camera, it's too perfect

Exactly 😆

The disgruntled lady thinking “Why do I have to put with this bs with this insane man”

That’s so true hahah

The way it keeps cutting back to the woman is like in a Tim and Eric sketch when it cuts back to the scene's straight-man

There's terrible cheating in this business; it's a racket

@@dombri Terrible pun XD Love it!

@@dombri Take your like and begone foul pungeon master.

Beans

I just spit up coffee all over my computer, thank you for this 😂😂😂

same here

Facts

👏🏻

I’m in awe at how meticulous this is. I’d have never imagined table tennis so intense with regulations.

Do u see anyone makin fun of him 🤨

it’s like vsauce

technically the truth though

@@zatoichiMiyamoto time??

Casual racism

“...in fact i brought one in case you want to know more”

As a matter of fact, everyone go ahead and give me your food. I need to inspect it and be sure it falls within regulation.

It's a job of measurements... And it's absolutely legal

Anything above 500 Calories held per person at one time in this break room is in fact, illegal, gentlemen.

lol

That`s not what us Germans are like😭 Or in this passionate man`s words: No. Zis is not legal.

Hahaha. Very dramatic. 😂

U made a german laugh, here's your medal sir 🏅

@@davy8128 not funny! 🇩🇪

I was expecting the equivalent of the Gestapo to come running in if he found anything illegal and then he pulls out a Luger and points it directly out her head threatening to blow her brains out

Ordnung muss sein. :)

@@XombraS_49 hehe genau so ist's ;)

Genauso

German and British people are the asmr gods

Actually, no. This is for a table tennis competition, and they have very strict guidelines with how the racket has to be and stuff. It's regulation standard, you just don't usually see them work.

Passion of the Paddle

Maybe he carries a gun and just straight up executes people who bring illegal paddles on the spot. With this man's precision, a headshot would be a cakewalk.

How very Hans Landa

Why do I see him screaming in German.

Haha! These inspecyions were invented so they could get Hans out of the office :D

He would make an unflappable customs inspector

W

I like to imagine that theres an actual chemistry lab in the next room, and a bunch of guys in lab coats testing rackets in various conditions.

@@jackmiller2404 Opens door, James Bond commandos training with flamethrowers and fast roping from the ceilings. ....Oops wrong room.....

@@jackmiller2404 Like willy wonkas lab, lots of bubbles and strange machines

"The racket passes muster. Don't worry, I have I already cleared with the boys upstairs."

I wonder if his favorite movie is American Psycho?

Under the passenger seat, there's an hi-vi, an alcohol test, the tire fixing kit, another torch lamp, the maintenance guide of the car, a satellite phone, a Glock 18, condoms and a bottle of water

@@lyanlegolmuth5005 How many condoms...?

@@vostokcosomonaut5205 Enough to avoid him to be the only father of the future generations.

@@vostokcosomonaut5205 a 12 pack with 4 missing

If I interpret his accent correctly, he does drive this car, except that it's called an Opel Vectra.

May i ask how many suvived the flight ?

Was the same for army ground vics

there weren't international gambling markets offering action on whether or not you and your bros would make it back at the end of each mission. people bet a lot of money on pro table tennis. god damn though it would have been amazing to bet on whether or not marine helicopters were gonna get blown up in Afghanistan and Iraq, whether or not a convoy was gonna hit any IEDs, so many possibilities.

@@larsfinlay7325 jesus christ that’s horrible. where can i sign up

@@beattrixkiddo2725 The Army isn't trained to as generally high of a standard as the Marines, for example Marines are required to run 3 miles in the pft, and the Army is 2 miles. That proves their standards are higher. Why are people in the Army always trying to associate themselves as the same level as the Marines?

you can clearly see she's feeling like she's having a fever dream

This is totally his bedroom!

@@kiliksama oh Im sure

Lmao, didn’t even notice that

As far back as I can remember, I always wanted to be a racket inspector

LOL I didn't even notice!!!!

Well in the end it is just for the competitiveness of an sport so in away it is not very important for the world. But for the sport it is quite important you don't know how much difference an illegal racket can make.

Well in the end it is just for the competitiveness of an sport so in away it is not very important for the world. But for the sport it is quite important you don't know how much difference an illegal racket can make.

😂😂😂😂

😂😂🤣🤣

Bro I think you can't handle it, you're simping so hard, I can respect that

@@kirstyw2045 yo you know I _want_ this man

Extraordinary username, you are certified most based gamer