"It's okay to fail" is something I really needed to know as a child. Whenever I failed I'd get screamed at, beaten, or have something of mine permanently destroyed, but I was also constantly shamed and hurt even when I wasn't messing up. I ended up taking this as "no matter what I do, I'm failing all the time, and failing results in extreme humiliation, disappointment, and pain". I'm nineteen and am still terrified of doing something as simple as turning in homework or applying for a job because in my mind I could never possibly do anything right so those attempts will only ever result in my suffering. It's horrible and makes life terrifying. Participation trophies and teaching people it's okay to fail are such good things. People, especially parents, do not understand how punishment for failure can go beyond just mildly harmful and actually cause someone to be entirely dysfunctional in life.
Same. My parents would sometimes even starve me when I got a fucking B. What did it teach me? Not to win. To never try out of fear of losing. I am getting over it now... but I wasted years of my life thanks to my parents.
I know how you feel. This comment is 3 years old now. I was 19 4 years ago and dealt with the same kind of feelings and anxiety. It took a lot of time for me to unlearn what I was taught but I'm currently in my last semester of college, which is something that was personally very important to me. I hope you were able to work through it and achieve some of your goals. Never forget to look back where you came from, so you can see how far you've come :)
Every time I hear a conservative talking about how they’re all about reducing the size and power of government I imagine a giant pie chart slice showing the republican military spending amounts sneaking up behind them.
It's like they don't know the difference between Conservative and Libertarian and which one actually means "small government" instead of "bigger government, just in the direction I like".
Prager U's point about Cell Phones Bad is especially hilarious when you know that there are tons of pictures of people from the 50s on a bus or train where every single one of them is just reading a newspaper and ignoring everyone around them. It's not a new problem, it's a "problem" that exists solely because old people so easily and often think that new things and change are just bad.
Yep! There are actually news articles & preserved letters throughout American history that mention how some newfangled thing is making people be antisocial... it's always the exact same claim, but applied to cell phones, computers, radio, television, and print newspapers.
I'm autistic, I've probably had a few opportunities to have a relationship or simply having sex, but I can't register when someone's into me. Posture, gestures, tone of voice. If they won't tell me straight out that they wanna take a relationship further or just to have some fun, it goes right over my head. But no, bruh, what I really needed is my grandfather to tell me I'm a virgin loser who will die alone. That'll, like, totally motivate me to find a woman.
“Parents coddle their kids and don’t let them get hurt that’s the problem” My parents hurt me emotionally and physically and I have depression so I don’t think that’s accurate David
Sooo, they did the opposite of the problem Dave mentioned and went too far/crossed a line. In the grand scheme of things, the retirement home or a correctional facility doesn't actually seem like a bad look for them.
That moment when Jerry Seinfeld and Chris Rock are talking over coffee. And Jerry brings up skateboarders. About how he admires kids who ride skateboards because of all the failed attempts it takes to land a trick. "When I look at those kids, I say to myself - those kids are gonna be alright".
There is lots of evidence that suggests that positive reinforcement is a lot more effective than negative reinforcement, I'm not really sure why this idea of beating children with the impending fear of failure is still a thing. I think it's still worth being aware of the ability to over-praise though. At some point as a child I kinda realised that people would indulge me with praise regardless of how well I did, and after that I was highly suspicious that any compliment I received wouldn't necessarily be sincere.
I don’t normally hang out with people anymore. Occasionally i will get in the mood for company and talk to people and invite them over. I started talking to a girl. She came over dressed in basically a clothing version of a bikini to watch anime. Cuddled up next to me, and kept giving signals but I was completely oblivious to the fact that she wanted more. Haha I look back on that situation and laugh my ass off every single time. The next few times she came over she dressed normally and didn’t cuddle up next to me. After the third time it was like strike 3 and she never talked to me again. Lol
This. This is a team-up. You boys tag-teaming Prager is the best Pornhub has to offer. Dave's still garbage, but I totally hope for him to turn out okay. SaveDave.
On your story about being oblivious to advances by women, my friend was really into this guy and slept in his bed and used his shower multiple times with nothing happening before finally just telling him she was into him. Now they’re happily married. So I mean, there’s hope for all you guys out there with the same problem.
Hard disagree on participation trophies tbh - we all knew they were bullshit. I don’t think they had as big an effect as people think they did, but I believe a better way about things is to focus more on collaboration than competition in school.
So... Where does this participation trophy come into play? I was in special ed during my early school years, and honors and AP classes during later school years... But I never got a trophy. My younger sister has never gotten a trophy. If anything, I see the opposite. Most schools see students as test taking minions, to be shuffled out into the world... And if students ask about life skills like actually getting a job, how do taxes work, how to find a place to live, how to make changes in their local government... They're basically told... "Ask your parents" or "figure it out"
They definitely exist. I "played soccer" one year as a kid (translation: sat in a field checking out bugs in a uniform while other people played soccer around me) and came away with a trophy at the end of it, it was the only one but I also wasn't very active as a child either as you can probably guess from the first half of this sentence. The "problem" is absolutely overblown to an absurd degree but they aren't just making it up, I'm sure a particularly outgoing but incompetent child could manage to fill an entire shelf with participation trophies if they really wanted to... although arguably that would just be a purely positive thing, since it would give them a wide variety of life experiences at a young age, so even then the anti-trophy raving doesn't make much sense.
@@TheSquareOnes when I got participation trophy's in sports it made me feel slightly less uncomfortable about how bad I was but I wasn't like "damn I got a trophy I was the mvp I'm going pro baby"
So wait, the self-proclaimed "Lord of Patriarchy" starts a video by yelling at the literal patriarchy to shut up and let us live our lives? Are we sure this isn't a really clever long form troll that we've all been unwittingly enlisted into? I mean, the age of the religious Poe is over, but the appeal of being a Poe hasn't just vanished. Maybe this is an ideological Poe. Please? Please let this guy be a brilliant bit? Come on, man... the clocks. He's willing to die on the clock hill. This is an act, this man is satire.
I graduated with a master's degree in 2005 just to be told I have to intern for 40 hours a week for free for a giant corporation if I wanted a job there later and then had to work another 40 hours a week doing manual labor just to get paid so I could barely pay bills and it still couldn't cover my loans which I still owe on 16 years later. Yeah, Dennis...I wonder why younger generations seem to think there's no way out and so they hurt themselves or worse?!? 🤔
At the risk of being too generous to the clockman and taking a joke too seriously: he's so close to not being shit. Of course the gulf between not being shit and being great is vast and filled with pitfalls, but if he could just take the bit of his brain that makes him speak out in this way about this subject and apply it to the things he likes, like being shit to women and other minority groups, he might get it. Who knows, maybe he will one day. And I hope he does, not because I think he might be based, or because it's funny: But because I genuinely do want people to want better things for everyone and to be better. And fuck it, if this guy could do that in a youtube video in front of his entire audience even unwittingly, then fucking anyone could so I would love for it to happen.
I've honestly never understood this whole participation trophy drama thing. I have a DISTINCT memory from being five where I got a participation trophy at the end of soccer in Kindergarten and asking my parents why I got a trophy if I didn't win. They told me that was true, but I tried my best and deserved recognition since plenty of kids didn't even play soccer. Is that anecdotal? Sure. But can anyone honestly say they got a participation trophy and thought "Oh I'm in first place too even though I'm not!"? I doubt it.
1:02:53 Optimistically I would argue that going to church also gives you a community to ease yourself out of bad moments with, but that's not guaranteed. Hell, it's definitely the less likely option than just being told to not do it under threat of Hell.
um we can absolutely provide everyone the opportunity to thrive, at least in america, with nothing more complex than redistributing resources. Globally, we could do that in a decade of development, alongside that redistribution. But everyones still doomered.
I mean if Lord of Cringe is gonna take on Prager U and say shit like how America is not a Christian nation he's at least somewhat slightly okay in my book.
I could see how the clocks would be neat as a decoration... If they weren't crappy walmart clocks. At least I always thought that was kinda cool in movies where they had Situation Rooms with clocks showing different time zones... So I get it, at the same time, if you're gonna do it, get better looking placards and better quality clocks, and maybe idk, a nicer background than a blank white wall to mount them on.
wait, lord of cringe did a namechange? though i must admit, in the personal freedom department he is pretty based indeed. just gotta click for him that more economic regulations and taxes actually increase the freedom of the individual
@@ausgoldman9442 I grew up a southern baptist conservative in a family of missionaries who spent 22 years in Africa. I became a non religious progressive leftist after serving 8 years in the U.S. Army and traveling the world and experiencing many different people, cultures, customs, languages, religions and foods. Took me a decade but on the political compass test I'm -8.63 left and -6.72 libertarian. I'm constantly learning and evolving.
@@chemdog1632 I hope it is making you happier. Jesus was literally anti-authoritarian. I feel like I was gaslighted. It really makes you not trust yourself. It's like you have believe in a lie to be okay or loveable.
@@ausgoldman9442 well I can say that after my deconverting I have become a happier more fulfilled person over time. I am however treading on slippery ground, I find myself falling in love with moderate muslim women. She says she doesn't mind my non belief but I've already softened my edge a little. Lol
Jake, why don't you invite Dave to one of your streams to debate/chat with him? As far as internet right wingers go, this guy is pretty good(ish). I genuinely think that we could salvage (at least somewhat) this guy like we did with Hunter Avalone. Edit. I commented before watching this. I am so rooting for him to come around.
Going through a divorce and contemplating dating again it was really comforting to hear the reminder that it's OKAY to be rejected and it's not a reflection on me (or even the other person). Honestly never thought I'd be taking dating advice from Jake but honestly I needed to hear it.
Honestly hope the Lord of Cringe content doesn't end anytime soon. These have been some of my favorite videos/stream segments and I'll be sad when he inevitably gets milked dry. XD
I always got friend zone but I'm only 5'7 and half with a weight problem thou I have battled it my whole life I'm not an economic success either soo it is what it is
By the simplest, barest metric, the point of participation trophies is to encourage participation. It's a level of testament to the achievement not of success, but of effort. There's a fairly "traditionally conservative™️ ethos to it. "Even though your pinewood derby car came in dead last, this little plastic trophy serves as your reminder that you tangibly have something that people who didn't build a pinewood derby car did not. Even if you lose both by the time you grow up, and never do anything related to wood or cars again, your childhood is richer for the experience of having put time and dedication into a project, and to see the fruits of your labor acknowledged."
"Work fields for someone who looks like me?" Working fields for corn? I once spent the night with someone before I picked up that they were into me... Like... I genuinely thought they were just tired and didn't want to sleep alone.
The whole participation trophy thing isn’t even a feature of young adult experiences right now. The kids who got those trophies are still in highschool. Well to fair, they are in highschool virtually because we have an idiot president.
It's disingenuous for Prager to ascribe faith as the sole provider of meaning for Jews, when Judaism is as much a cultural identity as it is a religious one.
I honestly don't understand why Boomers get all the shit for the world being fucked up right now. It was Gen X, my generation, that really deserves the hot coals. While the Boomers honestly trusted and believed in American capitalist society, Gen X hated all of that shit, offered no alternatives and played along anyway. We were old enough to know that the hippies were right. But we were just young enough to already be hooked on Nintendo, microwave burritos and shoes with lights in them. We kicked late stage capitalism into high gear so that we could have Hot Topic and the fucking Gap even though we openly despised that shit at every opportunity. What? You think Gen X'ers were gonna squat in abandoned buildings, playing music in random people's garages in exchange for drugs before becoming mega-famous rock stars and eating the business end of a shotgun at the height of our careers? Not a chance! We were gonna keep our heads down and play it safe just long enough to limbo under the deadline of a terminal economy so we could ride out the inevitable apocalypse in relative comfort. Seriously, fuck my generation. Psychedelic Philosophical side note: Meaning is just an illusion we tell ourselves in order to form a coherent narrative of existence. It's a post-experiential cognitive trick that allows us to function without being overwhelmed by the immensity of sensory data that we are bombarded with every moment of our lived experience. Weirdly Sexual Observation side note: You ever notice how there are no gay incels?
I just want to find a super attractive, blue-haired women’s studies professor to put in their faces and be like, “you’re right, this is disgusting.” I got into a stupid argument with someone saying that liberal women are disgusting, neon-haired freaks, so I sent him a pic of a super attractive woman with blue hair and said “yeah, this is gross.” He was like, “is that your girl?” No, but I’m definitely the Chad in this situation if you are already jealous of the mere idea of dating a blue-haired hotty. Ducking owned.
look if anybody ever feels bad abt their obliviousness just remind yourself that you aren't the clueless dork who had one of his closest friends flirt with him for six months straight, hanging out on his bed, loudly asking abt sexual preferences and experiences, and just generally being painfully obvious in hindsight and didn't notice until said friend made a blatantly obvious sexual comment that made the windows error noise play bass boosted in his head. (Though in my defense when this started she had a fiance so even if I had picked up on it I wouldn't have done anything since 'homewrecker' isn't exactly a moniker I wanna get at the humble age of 20)
So let me get this straight, the "greatest generation" were America's gifted child years and now that everyone has caught up, America is a burnt-out high schooler? I speak from experience when I say that America needs therapy.
Well, I’ll say this. Annoying reactionary libertarian right is objectively better than annoying reactionary religious authoritarian right. Not much better, but it’s something. As long as you’re on the bottom half of the political compass, i can at least agree on a few things.
My life was made worse by exposure to this unnecessary combo. Thanks for that. True though bout the collage thing. When I was in my late teens I was around collage students cause I stayed close to a big University and they'd be scheduling fuck sessions lol I'm too old and in a solid relationship but from what I hear from the ones I interact with now it ain't much different. However, while I don't think it contributed to the growth of the state or government by any stretch, I do think it's sad af that these social groupings have largely died out. We're social animals and we typically enjoy the company of like-minded people or people who enjoy the same activities as us. Community is massively important yet noticably absent from modern life. There's a reason why anarchists and other socialist groups start up/host/form community centers, social spaces, art spaces, music and live performance venues, bingo stations, bowling leagues/teams, bands, bookclubs, gun clubs, cafés, dance halls, juice bars, potlucks, community gardening, newspapers/zines, even churches, etc, etc, etc,. Name a group activity or social space and there's a solid chance we've got at least one lol But more than it being sad I think it's pretty clear that alienation combined with the death of the community/shift of surviving communities to largely online has been dangerous and made positive change more difficult to achieve. Most people will find their community one way or another and at any cost, but not all clots of people are good. One of the most common and dangerous are the ones where people alter their identity to fit into a grouping rather it's nationalism by identifying with the state, racial nationalism by clinging to a pseudo scientific construct, identifying with a god and joining a religion, identifying with a gender to the point that it's near all consuming and their sole personality trait, falling into an ideology and assuming it as their identity, etc. Obviously not all those clubs were necessarily positive lol Not by a stretch. Many were male only, there was a period where the Klan mainstreamed and boasted huge numbers, many have been "white" (whatever that means at the time) only, and a bunch have been religious or tied to reactionary ideals. So clearly they haven't all been a force for good but I think it's important nonetheless to try and build community whenever, wherever, and however possible in real world spaces. The internet is great but it can't substitute a real life community and support you in the way one can. But fortunately it's something most people are looking for so they're not that difficult to get started. They'll evolve over time like anything but building a solid foundation is vital to building a sustained community and it can be as simple as a couple friends starting a bowling team or whatever. Then maybe that bowling team hosts a food drive or clean-up campaign or coat drive, etc, and they'll start to pick up new people as they go. They're important not only for today but for the future and we are not likely to see real change til we get back to face to face relationships more than today and learn to work together on things beyond our immediate interests. ✊👊🖤☮️🥀🏴🌐 A///E
