Grace needed $2,000 USD per month for what? Was she living in a BGC penthouse? And needing $6,000 to set up a rental for John? She sounds like a scammer to me. But John was also very naïve to send that amount of money.
Never send money to someone you have never met If she can't wait until you get there go to the next lady. Don't fall for the sad stories. Don't do what JOHN DID PERIOD!!!!! DON'T DO WHAT JOHN DID PERIOD!!!
I disagree. It's OK to help her purely of your own volition, out of the goodness of your heart ... providing you get a strong vibe over time, that she's a lady you can solidly trust. Of course, there's never any guarantees ... if it doesn't work out, then own it like a man ... don't be a putz who tries to shirk responsibility for your own financial decisions. And, if she ever pressures you to send her money, particularly if you've only recently met her - then she's definitely NOT the one ... run a mile
I always enjoy your videos Mike, and I think this one will be helpful to many men seeking love overseas. I have to say that I disagree a bit with you about Grace. It seems to me that she was dishonest about her intentions at some point in the relationship, and she continued to accept money from John. She likely was not a scammer in the beginning, but I believe she became one when she decided to pursue another relationship without breaking it off with John. It sounds like she continued to take his money even though she was with another man. I feel terribly for John, who comes across as honest, but also seems very naive about money and relationships.
💯 % agree Mike. Number one rule, never send any money online until you have personally met the other person. Video chat also does not count either. Personally meeting someone can eliminate many bad possibilities, not all, but many. Even if you want to send a couple hundred each month, get your a$$ on a plane and visit even for 1-2 weeks. As long as the girl is spending his money on what he told her to do and he has confirmation of where the money is going, it’s not her fault. The only time the girl is at fault was when she made the decision to meet a different man and any money after that should have been returned or not accepted.
Sounds like you are a trying to be a Filipina advocate; even when you know what she did was wrong. Your rationale is weak at best and insulting at worse. Guys, the moral of the story. is don't be deperate, thirsty and most importantly of all don't be a SIMP!!!
Just my opinion. Just from experience. Wait till you move to the Philippines before a girlfriend. Do the boots on the ground to see if you like the Philippines. After boots on the ground go home without a girlfriend. Get life in order and move. Once in the Philippines you can take your time and find the right girlfriend. No LDR. Real good video I do agree with you.
Wow big monthly support but still cheating,..the mistake of grace, she did not tell first to jhon that she can't wait longer more months or yrs. So jhon maybe can fix the right schedule date to come Phil.
John was and probably still is a fool. This is text book on how to increase your chances of failure dating online. He tried to purchase a relationship. Totally the wrong approach. An average of 2k USD a month? He has zero clue how much that is in the PI for a local. The only thing she is guilty of is not waiting for him but with the constant delays in his schedule, he put doubts in her head whether he would ever come to the PI. I agree with all of your points Mike. Some people will never learn. This was no scam. He tried to put her on layaway like a commodity and he got what he deserved. Flaunting your cash will usually always fail. The best way is to get your fat azz on a plane and meet in person and go from there.
It listened to your story but what about her story? Sounds to me like the guy is married or dating someone in the USA. He keeps changing the dates. The guy really screwed up everything IMHO. Actions speak louder than words. They both have some fault but if a guy can’t get on a plane and meet in person, he has no business doing a LDR. If I was her, I would keep every peso and block him from every social media accounts you shared. These stories will never end because the internet makes everything to easy for people. He had an awesome dream. You know what they say….”Don’t Fall In Love With A Dreamer”
Until you meet someone in person, they are just an aquaintance no matter how long you have talked over the phone. This is just an example of how that works both ways.
@mikesphilippineretirement How long? Until he was in the Philippines for good. It sounds like the amount of money he sent (way more than necessary) is what held him back from getting there. He should have flown over, rented something small for awhile, grown the relationship, then picked out a house and built a life in person. On the other hand, guys our age have a justified fear of running out of time. In that regard, I don't agree with it but I can certainly understand it. I'm not arrogant enough to say I don't make mistakes too. In fact, I'm in the middle of a mistake as we speak and I should have known better. We are all human in the end.
She was getting by just fine before he met her online. How could this man be so incredibly stupid to start sending her money? And such a huge amount? Dumb and Dumber movie!
Yeah it’s first come first serve….I don’t blame her…my girlfriend got pregnant because she couldn’t wait anymore and I don’t blame her. I would of done the same thing. I’m moving there in June and I can’t wait….
Yes, John's the one who sent the money, but MG could have 1. Expressed skepticism at his arrival or 2. That she had met someone. She strung him along as long as she could. 3. To me, the TIkTok dancing was likely baiting a hook. He might not have been the only fish on the line! As to repayment: 1. Good luck, even if she wants to. 2. You have no contract, so on what legal or moral authority does she owe it to him? 3. MAYBE the last two months' payment is due, as she accepted it on false pretenses. But again, good luck getting her to find a way to scrape it together. I got snagged recently in the early stages of a scam in which the woman was coming HERE (USA). I gave her a little more slack than I should have, but I checked the documents she sent and it took a while to get answers as to their validity. Anyone can be taken.
$1000's every month is a lot. I have paid up to $200 for our dog, but not even every month. Usually I good for $50 every other month, and only for the dog. From the beginning I have rejected requests for a new cell phone and an alleged electric bill. She's clear about where I stand with that regard. Call me Tacanyo all you want. However In this case, I would agree that would have to have to find the the man guilty. $1000's of dollars is fool-hearty. Nobody should ever send money unless they are with the person physically. With respect to the female- It doesn't matter that she didn't 'make him' hit the Send Money button, the girl accepted the money based on false pretenses. Returning the money is wishful thinking.
This John guy wasn’t very committed to having a relationship, despise being a fool and sending money! But, for every 50 stories like these, there’s the story of my successful relationship, which was completely against “conventional wisdom”! You just need to be super selective in picking the right partner. And I did! We’ll tell you our story next month, Mike
I never pay for love. Just because everyone is giving money to Filipinas doesn’t make that healthy or right. Never send money. I personally never date online. I easily meet women all over SE Asia just walking down the street. That’s the only way to do it. Sending mingle is not healthy and is riddled with misperceptions. Each time I go to SE Asia it’s so easy to make local friends and date.
I really like this episode. He made the wrong choices and needs to live with consequences. Fear is a powerful adversary. I’m with you he couldn’t pull the trigger.
These ldr relationships have rules that have accumulated over the decades. The girls don't commit because guys say they coming all the time. So the ladies commit when they can touch you or someone else. This is gambling strategy bird in hand worth more than a promise. Best to take care of yourself first then her. Don't send anything you can't afford to cast to the wind.
Everyone is saying not to send money to anyone that you have never met in person... A better rule is Never send Anyone money Period !!!😢 Never start sending and you will never need to stop 😅 Come on Guys ! Do Not be a Simp 😮
Never send a woman money no matter what until you see her in person. Sorry to disagree, but this woman ripped this man off. That was a lot of money, and that is an amount to live in America. She should have broken up with him and stopped taking his money. I am not saying him not coming to see her sooner was right, but that was a hell of a lot of money.
He is never gonna see that money back. He has to suck it up and move on. It was doomed from the start after 6 months with in the conversation when he kept it online and started sending money. Its over with now cause I have learned that first come first serve. She will take the first person who shows up if you delay. He should not waist his energy. He still does not understand how life is there. He has not taken the steps to fully prepare. He needs some years under his belt to have a clear focus of what he can do. Need experience there that he might not like it as he thought. Like you said he was indulging in a fantasy that he did not make it a reality.
That’s a sad story but she should have told him as soon as she decided to not wait. I would never do that in the first place to someone I don’t know personally.
The way I assess someone is by understanding their intent. Seems that John freely sent money without Grace asking so her intent is blameless and although his was foolhardy, he was also blameless at this point. They owe each other nothing. He sows serious doubt in her mind by pushing out the date of arrival but like any human being shes happy to continue to accept the freely given money and still hopes that John will eventually turn up but now shes not holding her breath waiting. Then the new guy shows up and her feelings transfer to him. Now the intention of Grace has changed. This is when she should have come clean and stopped John sending any more money. She didnt do that and has now become a dishonest person. From a moral point of view she should pay back any money received from John after she started a relationship with the new guy. However we all know that will never happen. Note to John.... vloggers such as Mike and others constantly warn NOT to give out money to girls you never met in person. You chose to ignore this and have learned the hard way.
Mike from this story the takeaway is that never send even one peso to an online girl as you can't reserve any filipina with money. Whoever will bomb you with her problems is obviously a scammer. Unfortunately there are expats who give big value gifts and allowances once they meet for a holiday period which will not make a filipina loyal. As we know women all around the world never appreciate, this is a golden rule.
I can remember what my x so called fiance said once it was over: money cant buy you love. After being ripped off for years. These gals will lie love people to death.
John was a fool and got totally humiliated. Another dude is banging his GF and he’s never met her yet. She could have been stringing him along the whole time from the start. So she could have been a scammer. As so many have said, don’t get involved online. Just wait until you get there. And don’t send money. He should try and get his deposit back at least if she moves another guy in. It seems $22k is a lot for this guy with him being just a renter. That could go along way for him in retirement
I think she knew what she was doing all along Mike also John was a fool. That much money was crazy didnt he know how much money that was she played him like a guitar a old one sad story and she knew what she was doing in my opinion 🤔
Was he scammed? Hmm who realy knows if she was using the money he sent for what she said. Was he naive? He sure was!! Sending her a lil bit might not be too bad but he was sending her ALOT of money. Mike think about it: He was sending her the same amount that you have budgeted for a month every month. He stretched himself too thin and I bet he would have pushed it back further if she didn’t have that b/f. My new saying. “ Boots on the ground”
You made a video about 11 back about being to old to come here, for a lot of guys you are probably correct, but there are exceptions, I am 78, now I have been here for 12 years, was married, but we are separated now, we raised her son and niece, there age now is 15 and 11, about 3 years ago I lost my leg, and I was lucky to meet a fine lady age 47, she has her own house, and has 3 kids, a brother, and a sister living with her, her home is paid for, she has never ask for money, but I do help her money wise, she is also my house keeper 3 days aweek, so if you are lucky you can meet a good woman, who cares about me, and yes we are in a relationship, she spends nights here sometimes and I have spent nights at her home also, me and her kids and family get along great, they dont ask for anything, one boy is 23, daughter is 20, and a boy 6. so like I said there are some good ones out there. I agree with you when they start asking for money, it is time to let them, go.
Hi Mike and Janet ❤ I think she had the other guy all long. Lol . Who knows what was really going on. Anyone sending 2,000 a month to Philippines is asking for big trouble 😵💫 U Got to be here to have a Philippine girlfriend. If not yr taking a big risk. Great video Mike . Thanks 👍
I also don't believe a man who just filed for social security can afford to send $2000 per month, but cannot afford a plane. Ticket to fly over something is not clicking with his story
If he was in a position to send her $2000 a month he had enough money to travel to the Philippines 🇵🇭 He brought everything on himself sending all that money to a stranger online, He didn't know anything about the girl (ie) did she have a boyfriend, Even when you do meet the girl in person guy's still have to be careful especially if your only visiting some girls and even their families will try to hide the fact that the girl has a Filipino boyfriend.
THE MORE I HEAR ABOUT THE PHILIPPINES THE MORE I WOULD HATE TO LIVE THERE. SCAMMERS, HUMIDITY,POVERTY,LITTER, BROWNOUTS,ETC I THINK I WOULD RATHER LIVE IN TIJUANA.
If she doesn't return his money, she's a thief. She agreed to wait for this man until she got his money and another man came along. Do not trust these women unless she takes nothing from you.
As wifey do has always told us not to send money to anyone you haven’t yet met in person, sometimes even if you have met, you can come back to the USA to get things in order, go back and she’s no where to be found
Mike please don't pick sides of this scammer filipina. The filipina scammer played this game to suck money out from this simple brainless naive guy. If he wouldn't start sending money to this filipina on the first week he would have been ghosted. I am sure once the guy arrived to the Philippines she would never meet him as she is a scammer. Probably she assumed that the guy would go to the police if the money sent would be much more. The scammers know when to stop the game. Poor guy,I really feel sorry for him.
When she didn’t request a firm date first. She messed up. If he gave a firm last date and missed it, then she is free to get another guy. No penalty. But should have discussed a final firm date. Make it or I move on. That’s acceptable.
Interesting story Mike, your take is interesting also. Here is my take, first of all if I meet a woman who was in her position and I knew about John. I would never consider her for anything other than a fun right now girl. Her action says a lot about her character, he may not have come there when he said but he was showing his intent. If she did not want to wait ok, but say something to him and stop taking his money. Her doing things the way that she did shows she had no regard for him as a human being. If she could be that way with him she could be that way with anyone. I think it is just as important if not more important how someone would treat you if they stop caring. John was committed to her and the thought of them from the beginning and he showed it. She is committed to her self. As far as her friends and family and what they think. In my opinion it should not matter, what did they do to improve her life? I do think he was foolish to put his self out there like that. Regardless of how you feel about someone in a relationship you should be looking for signs that they care about you also or you are just setting yourself up for heartbreak.
If she's taking your money, she needs to wait. If she can't wait, then she needs to be honorable and stop taking your money. You are blind Mike. It's not her fault????? Man, you still are blind to this scam.
Yea, sorry to the guy but... as you said Mike, maybe he was a bit afraid ... don't know, he wasn't there so she ... Sending all that money, and he could have easily flown there.
I don't blame her at all. He wouldn't have waited on her if she kept changing the date. I plan on retiring over there in a couple years (Cebu) but I will wait to meet someone after I get over there and get settled in no rush and no money lost. Love your videos
John wants his money back???? Hahahahahahahahahahahahah. When does he go on the comedy circuit... cause he's a very very funny man or a very very delusional man.
bottom line: just another example of the fact that an LDR is not a real relationship. sending money from another country is only entertaining the delusion that the relationship is real.
Big mistake send big money like that without meeting in person. My bet that girl will probable play the new guy also a good one will wait or she was always about the money
I think she should return a portion of it. say half. If it wasn't her fault, then like you said, he is at fault. She did as she was instructed soooo I do think she is entitled to some of it.
Yeah, good luck in getting that money back. I blame him mostly but I still think she should've given him a warning. A deadline date "If you are not here by this specific date. I'm out. I'm moving on with my life" 🤔🤨
I have learned a long time ago to never let your money walk in front of you, the first thing I would not want a woman who can't wait for me a few months.
These guys make Mistake # 1. Things that start fast, end faster. How the hell can you buy rings, land, send money to build a house, get engaged to a girl you never met. And then surprised when it doesn’t end well. If you are short money, stay home. Terrible to be broke in any country, especially a country foreign to you.
He didn't do his research. If he had done so, he would have known that he was sending too much money and should meet her in person first. It seems like he had to keep delaying to build up his funds. Maybe he thought that giving her more money would keep her committed. I hope that he learned his lesson. 🤦♂️🏝🇵🇭
Promises not kept by John is the problem. If he continued sent money don't blame her for accepting it , boots on the ground is always best. He should have got a plane ticket to proof his commitment to her by coming to the Philippines. She should have told him she needed him to come or she need to move on., this is why LDR's are difficult to success..
John was a naïve disorganized rummy. Instead of sending all of that money he could have taken a one week vacation to visit her before committing to move there permanently. (Mike made that same point as I was typing this). John could have moved to the Philz and rented a place so there would be time to figure out where to live with Grace. Sending $2000/month was an extraordinary sign of commitment. I don't know about now but a dozen years ago the average amount of money sent from USA to person in the Philz was $300/month. I think she used her new place to snag a more appealing man (younger?) and I doubt that she told the new guy that John paid for the new house. I don't see a hero in this story, just marred characters.
I find some of this hilarious, i refused to send money, now im here quite a few weeks, doing boots on the ground. Im not finding anyone serious to date. Its same if you're here, they just trying scam money one way or another. Im starting to think that most of the dating scene here is wishful thinking,
The blame goes both ways, but the majority goes to John. HE sent the money with no physical involvement. He had a fantasy girlfriend that he made no commitment to. Two visits to the Philippines would have been enough to show that he was “serious”. All men with Filipina girlfriends or wives have heard this statement. John’s negative attitude is due to stupidity. I do believe that Grace is not a good woman. If she lied about the in person relationship while still accepting Johns money she wouldn’t have been honest even if he had moved when he said he would. I hope this is a lesson learned by all who are still believing that a LDR will work indefinitely.
Mike, you're not exactly 100% correct...you're 110% correct. John didn't handle this correctly. You don't order a delicious meal and let it sit for hours & hours until it's cold and tastless, or walk away & expect it to still be there hours later just because you paid for it. John needs to learn from this and move on. Good video Mike.
Yes the guy did a serious mistakle do not promise something you cannot keep hold on to your money and do not create false hopes. do not talk big slow down and prepare get every small thing in order
I enjoy travel/scenery/cost vlogs the most, but topics like this need to be addressed. I appreciate your realistic and pragmatic points. It's a narrow two way street. My take is both parties are messing things up in the end, but much could have been avoided if money wasn't sent and no promises made that couldn't be kept. Thanks for posting Mike and Janet!
