WHAT HAPPENED TO PERSONAL STYLE ? | OVER THE TRENDS | HOW TO FIND YOUR PERSONAL STYLE 

It occurred to me this week that I want to be INSPIRED and not INFLUENCED. “Inspired’ is a creative term, “influenced” is a monetary one. when I’m inspired, I want to be a better version for the best version of myself I can be! When I’m influence, I simply think that buying something will make me be that person!

I found this so interesting , I was a fashion student in the 1980s and now my Daughter is a fashion student and I find her attitude so different to what mine was . We all wanted to stand out , be different , now they all want to blend in , look like what they see on social media . I say create , don’t follow , absolutely we are all influenced by our surroundings but , hopefully those surrounding aren’t just social media . Well done you , for breaking away from that narrative .

I think this is why I can’t get away from thrifting. As the self aware Aries I can’t stand doing things because others are doing it lol. As soon as I see too many people in it I start avoiding it

High-waisted wide leg pants are my jam!

At 70, I still love what I love and shop accordingly -I don't want to look like everybody else. You addressed STYLE so beautifully, thank you.

Lately, I don't watch content from a couple of influencers I follow as often as I used to. I get a bit turned off by them because they kind of only show what they have bought, instead of giving advice about how to create your own personal style. Your video and your message are much needed. ❤️

I totally agree! Who has money to keep adding to their wardrobe every season?? Maybe a piece or two here and there. I love how "influencers" love to say what's in and out of fashion. If you find your own personal style, it becomes timeless. I think it's ok to evolve as you grow, but for the most part I know what I like and what I feel comfortable in❤

I really love the humanistic approach to this video. It really brings back home how creative we were before social media and Pinterest. Allowing ourselves to get back to what we know as far as who we are and what REALLY makes us glow. I found myself getting away from what I know works for me. looking back at old pictures truly shows me what my style was and is till this day. I’m 42 and proud to say I’ve always loved easy relaxed simple clothes and interesting accessories 😊

I'm actually amazed how much the exercise of imagining your own fashion collection from scratch and giving it a name clarified things for me. I get so caught up in types of fashion and what styles appeal to me when it can really just be boiled down to big boxy cuts and durable materials that just look cooler and cooler the more worn they get. It was just a lightbulb moment of "oh duh, canvas, leather, denim. Earth tones and deep saturated warm colors. Loose cuts I can comfortably move in. Big dramatic collars. No sleeves unless it's a jacket." that cut through all the noise.

Figuring out WHY you’re drawn to a look before trying to emulate it is so key, because then you can really let your individuality take over instead of just replicating someone else. And the tip about looking at the runway is excellent, the raw design principles of the garments really shine the most there.

Thank you for this post. I totally agree. I’m quite bored of style influencers posting the same ideas, outfits, trends, sponsored pieces. It’s gotten repetitive and boring. Styling matching sweatsuits with a long wool coat…. A button down with wide leg jeans and a sweater over the shoulders… we’ve all seen it. And the never ending “core’s”, I just can’t. I want to see fresh and new ideas… actual personal style ideas. So thank you and I’d love to see where you go with this.

My mother recently passed and I've been doing a lot of thinking lately. I've just started a real, earnest attempt to revamp my closet with pieces that suit me on a deep level and its the most exiting process! For the first time (possibly ever) I'm starting to LOVE the clothes and shoes I have. Another interesting side effect is that I'm less and less concerned about my weight and body insecurities. I'm positively distracted by my love for the clothes.

This was the most intelligent, unique, and enlightening analysis of personal fashion that I have ever experienced. Ms. Carolyn is brilliant. I’ll have to watch this several times, there are so many layers to absorb. Loved it.

Finally!! Thank you for speaking up! A lot of these fashion influencers seem to lack their own personal style nowadays. Everybody's channel wearing the exact same thing talking the same way about the same thing. I'm over it! what are they influencing us to do walk around looking like twins?! These fashion influencers are starting to look like robotic retail influencers not stylish fashion influencers same content,same look and no personal style. PLEASE MAKE IT STOP✋🏾

I love this video because you’re not serving us monetized fish (influencing us with items) You’re teaching us how to fish ( a systematic way for us to find our own personal style and stop over consuming while moving futher and futher from feeling like ourselves)

You are correct in your analysis. I am a modern man with a personal preference for the Humphrey Bogart look. Pants with pleats, clean shoes, properly laced oxford shoes, shaved with a touch of spicy fragrance. When you look good you also feel good and ready to take on the world. Best wishes.

Hi Carolyn! This is 75 years young, and I must say you did it again! What an intelligent, honest, and thoughtful video! Great job! ❤️❤️❤️

I'm doing a 100 day challenge of no thrifting, no shopping and simply playing in my own wardrobe and aiming to wear and share a 100 different outfits that just make me happy. Day 20 and already feeling reenergised by what I already own. I found I was just buying more and more and not appreciating what I already have. Genuinely personal style is the best. Great thoughts here! x

I watch alot of Korean dramas and Korean youtubers who just walk around Korea. I enjoy watching what the people wear, and I love seeing sundresses with cute sweaters with simple low heels it's such a feminine esthetic to me. I'm going to be adapting that look for the summer.

YES. When I was a teen, I used to be sad that I could not follow one visual style, because I like things from different styles and subcultures. After a while, I realized that this is ~personal style~ and that a lot of the people I followed (the ones who had a somewhat ""unique"" style) had different influences too and did not try to fit in a box. When you post a pic of a outfit nowdays, there are always people asking "what's this aesthetic?" bcs they think you should have one, to give them a simple answer.

I feel the over stimulation. But I also feel like I’m evolving and my style is evolving

Omg! Boomerang is my favorite movie! I’m not sure what my “style” is, but I loooove to see a great pair of jeans with a screen print tee and a blazer. That’s my jam.

Sis i love that you made this video. I was just saying that all the content creators and influencers are influencing each other. Wearing and saying the same thing and it's getting boring. I love your unique since of fashion and it inspires me. Please continue to be unique. Everybody seems to be chasing the partnerships and not the art of true style. Most don't have it. They may have fashion, but they don't have style. I love it sis... unplug, get re-inspired and inspire us!!!!!!

I wanted to take a moment to express my appreciation for your recent commentary. While I typically refrain from engaging on various platforms, your words resonated deeply with me, prompting me to break my silence. Your thoughts on the overwhelming influence of certain trends and influencers in the past year struck a chord. It's refreshing to find someone who shares a similar perspective on the saturation of new merchandise and suggestions flooding the market. Your decision to shift focus towards appreciating what you already have, shopping your own closet, and embracing gratitude is truly commendable. Your post eloquently addressed the inaccuracies and pitfalls that many women encounter, leading them into debt and fostering feelings of insecurity. It's a brave stance to challenge the status quo, and I wanted to applaud you for speaking your truth so articulately. I genuinely hope that this year brings you the courage to continue sharing your perspective and living your most authentic life. Your voice is a valuable contribution to the ongoing conversation about self-worth and contentment in an era dominated by external influences. Thank you once again for your thought-provoking commentary. Wishing you a year filled with authenticity, courage, and continued self-discovery.

Yessss people feel like if you dont follow certain trends that you're not stylish or "can't dress" like chile my style is my style its been this way forever i just throw different spins on it as time goes

I agree that fashion trends have become very uniform and individual style has taken a back seat. I refuse to fit in , my eclectic artistic soul needs creative expression.

I’m so happy I’m not the only one who thinks like this. I honestly think you have amazing style! Even if you purchased a “trendy” piece, you still finesse it your own way, YOUR OWN STYLE. I’m honored to have found you last year. A lot of people I used to watch, all started wearing the same things. Literally the exact outfits. Influencers seem to have stopped their own style, just to make the money, and sell to the masses. Thank you so very much for being YOU, for speaking up on the madness in a sea of uniformed trends. LoL - “cookie” Tanee 😉

This is one time the nosey RU-vid gods got it right! I was literally standing in my closet looking at my clothes saying yo myself “who is this person?!” Nothing looked like or felt like me. Since the pandemic I am wfh. I don’t really go anywhere so I just shop and shop then never wear it because it’s REALLY not me. I’m not a girly girl but have every designer bag in my closet just collecting dust. I decided I’m going to purge and figure out my style. Turned on RU-vid as background noise and you were the first video to pop up. This “Think Piece” was on point! Preciate you. New subscriber here 😊

So many of us are aligned to this. I currently post videos of outfits I put together from shopping my closet and they showcase my personal style - we don’t all have to be edgy or fashion forward 😉 Truth be told, if money wasn’t a factor in shopping, my style would be similar to what it is now but with a different level of quality. I really enjoyed this video! Proud cookie ❤

I'm so much happier and satisfied with my personal style after getting color consultant and knowing my kibbe style. it has helped me to know what colors, styles and patterns suit me rather than following a trend that looks the ugliest on me.

You are 1 of 2 RU-vidrs that I watch. Everyone else got weird to me this over consumption is toxic...they are wearing all of the labels with zero style. Chillleeee! Then they are always saying how they got this or that on a good discount smh...I didn't realize I felt so strongly about this lol

This is why the things I thrift are usually my favorite items. I got off social media (some time last year) and I’ve missed your content in my fashion girl repertoire.

I must say, this was the perfect conversation that most of us needed. I started this year saying I have too much stuff, I don’t need anything else and I certainly have no room. I’ve been influenced to buy things that I won’t EVER wear and I LOVE BEING AT HOME! You’ve helped a lot of people with your honesty and vulnerability.

This is spot on. I searched the Ralph Lauren fashion shows on RU-vid and i was blown away with INSPIRATION! I pick and chose what resonates with me and am always wearing what I like. Then I see others copy it. Then I move in another direction just because I like being different & true to me

Carolyn, carolyn, thanks for your honesty, humor, and introspection. I'm over 60, but not 65 yet. Fashion is important to me. Interior design is "my my" deep thing! They really are close cousins. I have been questioning the need to have the next new thang, and the "sponsoring" to encourage more consumption. It's incredibly disturbing. I've found myself tempted to buy/ try, get subscriptions and have boxes coming monthly of clothing, makeup, perfumes... it is insanity!!! I've quit being influenced by "Influencers", but I take their talent and adapt it for my lifestyle. I sew, and am now learning to thrift for some things and alter for myself. Thanks for encouraging others to press the reset button. Access the what's and why's and be true to yourself. And be financially astute. I applaud you, your style, beauty, talent and evolution 🎉

Well said. I’m an artist and I express myself through fashion. For the most part I wear what I want….not what I’m told to wear. I don’t follow trends or fads. I have a personal style. Thanks for the distinction💐.

🎀I have always worn what I personally like, regardless of trends.🎀

This is one of your best! I so appreciated this one. I have worked in a fashion space for 18 years and never let the trends dictate what I wear or wore. I always incorporated my personal style into whatever department I worked in. I was told by my manager who is a Buyer that she’s never seen me wear anything twice. Gurl, of course I have! I just mix it up! It’s so freeing to be your unique, beautiful self! Thank you Carolyn, I love the direction God is leading you, stay the course. ❤❤❤

Back in the day I used to work on movie sets and would run around looking for items that aligned with celebrity's style aesthetic. I developed my own sense of style not by having the latest and greatest but curating my own personal style & identity. All I see now are copycats. We all look alike & have to get the same things to be cool or fit in, etc.These high end designers are making a killing off our lust for the things and they really dont want to see us in it. In comes the infuencer to help people spend money. So I adjusted my attitude and behaviors. Now I like all the things but if it does not align I have to decline.

I’m so happy you said this!!! I’ve been feeling like this with personal style all the way to the way people style their homes. I always try to incorporate my own style because that’s when I feel most in tune with myself. I think everyone is getting addicted to clicking on a link to purchase and it being at their door. Instant gratification is causing us to lose who we are to the core.

It has been so long since I’ve heard anyone talk with such passion and clarity about what they love in fashion and why specifically for themselves. Yes! What is the fit going to do for you when you walk?!?! Not just in a 2D posed photo

So from a senior fashion/style person I have always watched old movies from 1920-1970 the variety the style Amazing

And let's be honest Carly. A lot of people never had personal , no shade, just truth. That's why they are so easily INFLUENCED. I LOVE THIS VIDEO.

F.I.T. is my Alma mater. This is one of the best personal style talk video I ever listened to. Very honest and full of integrity. Great job Carolyn.

Omg !!! I have been screaming this for a good while. Everybody looks the same, clothing isn’t exciting to me anymore. So I’m in the same space of redefining my style.

You are so on point with this conversation. It really struck a nerve for me as well. Because it really made me realize. That people act like sheep’s in this society these days. At the same time made me proud of myself for never following any of this stuff.

This was needed. I am rebuilding my wardrobe after holding on to clothes for 10+ years… none of which I actually felt my best in. I’m getting a lot of inspo from Pinterest, but I find myself trying to keep up/be on trend or on brand that I have lost my personal style. Thank you for reminding me to go back to what makes me ME.

Trends in fashion tell the powers that be how far or easy it is to test the vulnerabilty or gullibility of certain (black, for e.g.) demographics and what the brands can get away with. Influencers make discomfort and exploitation more palatable and manageable which in turn leads to increased suffering, discrimination and divisiveness in other areas if society. Style forward people, mavericks signal someone who is aware, confident, not risk averse, a disruptor, someone not afraid to represent their authentic self without the cloak of uniformity, anonymity. Someone not easily understood, accepted, or intimidated.

I honestly feel like this is a long overdue conversation and I’m sooo grateful that you started it. I’ve been in a season of being authentic with me and engaging back to what I like regardless what it popular opinion. You’re timeless! Thank you for this!

I am living in a constant state of being overwhelmed with "inspiration", influence, pictures and "guidance" to what i should wear. I am watching streams like this because I really like this new notion that women AND men want to step back and get to feel, create and decide themselves what they want/ should/ can wear in society. So many things have to be considered! Like sustainability is now a huge factor for me. So I can only say you are so right with working from your inside towards what you want and need for yourself and taking a step back from all that noise!

First off..shout out to Baltimore! Secondly, thanks for this Ted Talk (lol) I truly needed it. I have so much stuff and I don’t wear it. I feel like my style is all over the place but I’m going to use your tips and hone in on my personal style and what brings me joy. ❤

I think your channel came up in my feed because this is the conversation I am craving! Seriously! Buying "the latest thing" can't compete with investing in your personal style.

I’ve been told I’m fashionable and based on how you defined it, I suppose I am lol. But you definitely helped me open my mind to even more possibilities as far as understanding my aesthetic. Thank you! You just gained a new sub!! 🎉🎉🎉

The Devil Wears Prada, Clueless, Living Single, are my go to. Great content! I’ve definitely been thinking about my wardrobe and how I want to change things around.

Thank you for this video! I've been in such a fashion rut and the older I get, the less I like the stuff in the stores where I'm used to shopping. Between the pandemic and working from home, I've felt frumpy and out of it, and when I DO venture out, it's to stores that I probably need to stop shopping at (ie Forever 21, H&M, and Target). I think I hadn't accepted my age and that, as you said in so many words, the evolution of my lifestyle and what I feel good in. And I want to get back to the NYC girl I used to be who would buy up every fashion mag and interpret looks for myself, buy quality pieces, and enjoy mixing and matching. Love to see an elevated conversation on fashion! xo

On point! In my big age, I still love fashion and will watch fashion shows and make notes, then shop my closet to pull together an outfit! Thrifting helps me to tweak my wardrobe and find that special something that evokes a memory, or feeling. I love your think topic! It really helps me to be happy with my personal expression of who I am and desire to show the world. Thanks so much!

What a great review of personal style vs trends. To me fashion is wearable art and I l love dressing to show my personal style. Thank you for the review and thoughtful reminder to stay true to your own personal style.😊

I really enjoyed this "chat" and we all need a reminder to not get swept up in trends. My goal in watching articulate, knowledgeable fashion gurus like you is to develop my own personal style, so you made a lot of sense to me. I am 61 and just fell in love with fashion last year. I am a creative person in home interiors and journalism and what a surprise it was for me to realize fashion is art as well! As a newbie in this area, I really ejoyed your video.

the way you cant even go on pinterest without someone asking "What aesthetic is this?"

Gurl' you are inspiring me to take my ass back to fashion school and get my damn degree in Fashion Merchandising. I LOVE your channel.

When I was growing up, I got a lot of my fashion from my surroundings and peers. When you dressed outside of the trend, you were dressing "different". For example, Kanye with the polos. It was different to us but it was Boston east coast trends. I remember Seventeen magazine featuring different cities and their styles and they had my city 'Detroit' featured and I was pride. I think the mob wife "trend" has characteristics of Detroit current styles. Mind you, the mob wife trend was going on around the same time as crack in the 80s. It was the "my husband is a kingpin aesthetic" 😂. We always been pretty big on the fur coats. Dom Kennedy has a song about how he got his first fur in Detroit. I'm not saying Mob Wife style isn't NY/NJ Italian style... because it is...but unless we're bringing back leopard print coats, silk shirts with a flowy slacks, I don't think people really want to look like the 80s. You have to take the good and the bad of the 80s style otherwise it's not mob wife aesthetic. Plus anyone living below the Mason Dixie line should remove themselves from this trend. It doesn't even look right in the south.

I’ve been struggling with this! As a curvy girl a lot of these “trends” are not flattering! So your approach is super helpful

Fashion is inate. The idea of designing 5 items and how it would look; genius!

“What makes ya feel good, sis??” 😂❤️ We honestly need to return to that. I didn’t know until I watched it, but this video was exactly what I needed. You successfully managed to cut through ALL of the noise on the ENTIRE internet with this perspective. Brava!! 🤩🎉

I’ve asked this question a lot in the past few years. It’s definitely the trendiness and lack of personal style that makes me click off a video. I really enjoy the uniqueness that I would see people bring to their own look and I do feel like we’re moving too far away from it. I appreciate the desire to move the conversation in a new direction. ❤

This is a great video. I'm new to "luxury influencing' though I'm frustrated when I see every luxury influencer pushing the same things, mostly styled similarly- even down to jewellery!! I would never want a Cartier Love Bracelet, for example. I've seen so many on other women I would never want one. I'd say that if I liked them, too. I don't want to look like other women or wear what they do. I like to look like me. It's nice to be fashionable but what's fashionable to me may not be to someone else. I have a few things in my closet that my husband and son hate with passionate intensity- and then they get angry when I'm continuously complimented for my look. It's nice to be complimented but that's not the point, at least it's not for me. If I love something and I think I look good wearing it if and if it looks like 'me' and I can I style it in my head with stuff I already own?? It doesn't matter to me one whit what anyone else thinks. If I love something and wear it with confidence I know I'm looking good because I'm feeling good with my personal style.

I love you for doing a video on this topic! For the past few years I feel like personally styled don’t exist because I constantly see most people in the same things and styles the same way. I have always been a person who love and admire people with personal style. I love going to the stores and seeing something that sparked joy in me. Try it on visualize how I can wear it and then buying it! My personal style definitely comes from that experience! I never have to follow any trends because a lot of the things that would be trending has been in my closet for years and I have been wearing because it’s part of my personal style. I respect you fully for that video because I know it must have been hard to put out being a content creator! Thank you so much for sharing your thoughts and opinions on this matter!❤

I have been pregnant and nursing for the past 6 years. Up and down and clothes that serve a purpose. In my postpartum low moments I have fallen for some "fads". But ultimately, I always got back to my personal style. I always love a good fabric, as a tailor, and a classic look with accent pieces. This is why I love thrifting. I love the quality fabrics and the classic looks I can put together.

People seem to be scared of just doing them and Yes I’m tired of seeing All these Clones out here..I’m one whose neveR liked looking, following the Trends, it’s like accept my style or go to hEll..it’s BoRING

‘90s romcoms are great for style inspiration! And Friends, of course, for everyday looks.

Hey I just started watching your channel and I resonate with the message you’re making. I think many people who’ve studied fashion and or come from a design background feel the same about fashion and trends. The reality is that creating your own personal aesthetic is challenging for most people. But for creatives and designers it comes more naturally and is exciting to develop. For the average person it’s easier to be drawn to a trend or fad and wear it because they may see a proven concept of being cool or acceptable. This is why the average person feeds into trends and are easily influenced by influencers and fashion houses.

You hit the nail on the head with this video. I’m so confused on my personal style for the past couple years. I just couldn’t figure out what is wrong with me. I need to stay off social media for awhile except for a select few channels like yours. 😁

When you are young many love the fads and as you get older you do not care about what others say and rock what you want.

You are speaking to me; for the past few months I’ve been on the path to have and buy things I really love!! If I see it online or put it on and don’t get that warm fuzzy feeling, I don’t buy it. If I feel on the fence about it, I don’t buy it. The things I’ve had for a while that I’ve struggled to style, I’ve been consigning or donating because that means it really wasn’t my style to begin with and it needs a new home. I want a wardrobe I can pull from to put my Ish on and just feel like I’m that chick every time I step out!! 😊 I absolutely appreciate your unique style and the fact you’re not just pushing the same pieces we see over and over again.

For years, I watched "Doctor Zhivago" only for their costume designs. Decades later, yes decades, I finally knew of the plot lines-still my favorite movie.

As a fellow professional in beauty and retail I 100% agree- I have been influenced more than I needed to be- truth be told!

Thank you! I’m tired of seeing the same outfits on everybody. No one is unique anymore.

I sooo agreeee! Some people pretend to be interested in things and call it a generalized theme or concept and then say its an aesthetic. Yet still cant establish their own since of style or interest ..its just alot of media visual vomit

Yes! Like Anna Wintour has all of fashion at her finger tips, but has found her personal style that rises above trends and fads. She has signature style that is timeless. I think we all need to find that place where we know what sparks joy and feel like our true selves in our clothing. The older I get, the more I’m embracing what brings me levity and joy. Cancer changes your perspective. I don’t waste time thinking about fads and trends. I want beauty and whimsy and comfort and I’m done over-editing myself so much. A little over the top is part of my essence and feels natural as I’m a Kibbe Romantic. Understanding this has unlocked so much for me. Beautiful video. Gorgeous sweater❤.

I never comment!!! I'm such a RU-vid birdwatcher but Girl I LIVE FOR YOU!!! Such a breath of fresh air!!! I'm 34 an having come up before social media but also the start of it has been extremely interesting to experience. My mom was a fashion merchandising student as well she would sew me outfits when I was a toddler and get get fits made for every occasion from my aunt who was a seamstress. I was the teen who hated when friends copied her lol now like you mentioned it's limited creativity when it comes to personal style and as original as I use to be I believe I got sucked in as well. So THANK YOU for the inspiration!!! To look back on my personal style and remember who I am as it relates to my personal style as well as my fashion roots! You are appreciated. God bless you!

You spoke the truth, Carolyn! Personal style is definitely Personal. Enjoyed this video!

I'm so happy I found this channel! Thanks for sharing your light and wisdom.

One thing that bugs me is influencers whose homes are clearly curated by Amazon and Walmart. It's all cheap, made in China junk. It may be an age thing. Younger folks tend to have more contemporary style. As you get older, you embrace more elegant, antique or vintage style. These days, my home is curated by Waterford and Wedgwood. I don't miss my IKEA and Amazon stuff.

Oh this is such a needed video. Trends are crazy these days with social media pushing all these trends. I think we all have to watch out for the FOMO cause we will go broke trying to be current with the “trends”. I mean quiet luxury is not a trend. There are a lot of people who dress this way and have been dressing this way forever. It’s not a trend…it is a style of dressing. Yes personal style can fall by the way side if we do not stay on top of who we are and how we live our lives. I was at a very trendy and expensive hotel in LA a couple of months ago and I saw 4 young ladies(28-35 ish) and they all looked the same. Over size blazer, a trendy handbag, it was literally a uniform. I thought it was funny since they all looked the same but I thought it was sad cause there was no ‘vibe” . You have a great perspective on fashion so keep the videos coming!

I dont really follow trends, but at the same time I dont want to look outdated.

I so appreciate you discussing this topic. It needed to be said.

Your thoughts are so valid and on point!

OH MY GOD I LOVE YOU. I’ve been feeling this for years and I’ve been basically just yelling YES THAT at this entire video. Subscribed!

Your channel is such a breath of fresh air. Thank you for sharing your insight with us. We LOVE you for it!

100% vibing with this fresh perspective! ❤❤

I soooo needed this!!

I loved this video. You spoke the truth about style being personal. I'm inspired to review my own wardrobe again and see what sparks joy.

Girl, you hit the nail right on the head!

Love how you explained everything ! I personally feel the same way when it comes to personal style and trends.

This was great, I totally get it - thank you for sharing this particular video. This was needed/this industry needs your truth. You're definitely set apart.

Finally a breath of fresh air and truth.

Such a unique and different perspective to have, love this

“ yourself in clothing form” ❤ that part!

This is my first genuine subscription. This channel is a vibe

Loved this talk, it’s cool to see someone get excited about fashion in a different way 💗!