My heart goes out to you beautiful mother. your child really loved you and I pray that your child’s loving arms are always wrapped around you. I also lost my son he was 21. It’s been 5 years and I’m also in pain it doesn’t go away.. we must keep pushing beautiful. One day at a time one day at a time! Much love to you💕💕💕
This makes me emotional. I’m 14 and am severely depressed, anxious and have a past with suicide. I say I’m ok when I’m really not. Listening to this makes me realize what could’ve happened to my family if it worked all three tries from 6th -7th grade. I’m in ninth and doing alright. I made honor roll of that means anything! Harry styles had helped a lot through music. All 1D song have ( when they were a band) and still do. I want to tell Harry thank you in person one day.
@ Styles - Good on you for finding what works to help - Music is big for me too!! Love that! I know this isn't easy and I'm proud of you for fighting on. Super big hug sweetie. You are loved and there a lot of people around you that do care - even if it doesn't feel like that at time.
you are wonderful fro sharing please make sure your family knows everything and leeps supporting or who ever you enjoy the most. thanks for encouraging us
When you are feeling depressed and suicidal...call on the name of the Lord Jesus Christ. He will help you, comfort you and sustain you. Ask him to come into your life and forgive you of your sins. Your peace will come.💖
Do you have someone to talk to? I know that it might not seem like it, but having someone to talk to about what you're experiencing can help a lot. If you have access, please consider seeing a school counselor, psychologist, or therapist. I'm glad music has given you a lot of meaning, and I hope you continue to find healthy ways of coping with your emotional pain because that's what you deserve.
i had severe depression and suicide thoughts when i was in college. The love from my family and knowing the devastating effects it would have on my family prevented me from ever trying it but I was in so much pain. After years of therapy and various anti depressant medications I have finally found a happy life. I am hoping that things will get better for you over the years as well.
I am crying. My 16 yo little brother took his life 6 months ago. I have always had a positive outlook, and see this as an opportunity to be better. But man, sometimes I need to watch videos like these to know that everything will be alright. Thank you
Wow i needed this today my daughter also called Zoey died 5 years ago in a car crash .i turned to you tube for help tonight as the grief is overwhelming me tonight .The bravest thing you can do is to get up when all you want to do is die
Thank you. While that moment has passed, it was terrifying in the moment. If you’ve experienced a moment like this, there are others who can help with the trauma.
My 24 year old son just committed suicide last weekend and we just had his funeral this past Saturday. I am so lost and broken without him. He sounds a lot like your daughter, everyone liked and loved him, we are all devastated. I hope I too will be able to speak like you someday to help myself heal as well as others. God bless.
Melissa, I am heartly sorry for your loss. I know how hard this is as a parent and for his friends. More than anything, stay connected to one another. You will help them and they will help you too. Sending so much love to you. ❤️
..I lost my 21 year old son to suicide just a week ago Saturday as well. it's only been a week since we laid him to rest. We are still so broken and I'm sorry for your loss as well...i wish I could hug you.
We just buried our 22 year old daughter who lost her life in a car accident this weekend. She was moving across the country to start a new life with the love of her life. She didn’t even live 15 minutes after landing at the airport. We are all in survival mode trying to figure out, not the why but the how. HOW do we move on with life without her?? I know in my heart it starts with the decision to get up. It’s finding that strength to live on every day that is the struggle. My daughter was a beautiful soul, gorgeous on the outside as beautiful as she was on the inside, always with a smile on her face and ready to brighten anyone’s day. I grieve for the life she would’ve had. I grieve for the brilliance that would’ve been her life. I grieve for all the souls that she touched and the emptiness she left behind. Thank you for this video; your words ring true in our hearts. We just need to find the strength to take that pain and turn it into something that would honor the memory of our children. That has to become our new WHY.
Sir and/or Ma'am, I am heartily sorry to hear about the loss of your precious daughter. i'm sure there is a blur right now for you. This is all so very fresh for you and this journey, while so very difficult, will also illuminate the love that is abundant all around you. I appreciate your words and wisdom. Sending you so much love - parent to parent. And I agree with you. with time, you will find what the true purpose of all this is. You have already declared that you will get up and I know that's not easy as well. Please know that better days are ahead.
I just found this by accident, I’m a teen struggling with depression and this reminded me that I have to keep trying no matter how hard it gets because I can’t do that to my friends or family. Thank you so much, I’m sure zoey is proud of you for helping so many people
What ever you do remember there are people who love you what ever pain you are going through remember this "it's not for ever it's just for now" keep your head up
I struggled with depression when I was a teen too, and I know what you're going through is more difficult than a lot of people could imagine. I'm really proud of you for keeping up your fight and I'm glad you're still here. I hope that one day you find a reason to fight not only to protect your loved ones, but for yourself. Sending all of my love! Keep pushing
I lost my daughter to Suicide 1 day before my 50th birthday with my grandchildren at home. It set off a collapse of almost total destruction of our family and almost losing my other daughter twice right after her sister died. Twice she was on life support. I needed this. Thank you and God Bless you and all of us survivors.
His story of the last night and finding his daughter. I have no idea how I would live with this memory, let alone turn it in to a memory which fuels a passion to help others. What and incredible person.
I'm sorry to hear of your loss as well Indra. Sending love to you. You are correct, life won't be the same. In my experience, I've found a way to both honor Zoi and myself at the same time - it's ok to do both - So yes, life isn't the same, but it's better now if that makes sense.
"I choose to get up and live beyond the loss". Thank you so much sir I desperately needed to hear this. Thank you for being an epitome of courage, strength and unconditional love.
I lost my baby girl, though not to suicide, she was just 3 weeks old. That was 18 years ago. As he said, you have to get up....not to survive....but to live.
Thank you for this comment. I agree... there are A LOT of questions we ask after the suicide of a loved one... But, just because death took our loved one's live, it doesn't mean that our life is lost, too... Your questions is VERY valid. I asked those same questions too - including Why am I still here if Zoi isn't?.. I guest it's because I still have things to do...
@@peytonbusby324 I felt like that for a period of time too. That feeling you have right now will fade with time. I’m sorry you are in this place. I know it’s not easy
Thank you so much, we lost our son with short illness with cancer 4months ago , listening to you made me smile and cry because our son would say the same thing love and gratitude xx
@@theultimatereductionist7592 oh come on, people need to have children for our species. Writing this on a video about a parent's worst nightmare is so inconsiderate.
I lost my 27yr old daughter recently and found her dead in her room. It’s so difficult to cope with but I’ve taken some comfort and inspiration from this so thank you. My condolences to everybody who’s been affected by the suicide of a loved one, we can get through it with the support of each other.
Marcus - I am heartily sorry for you. Father to father, I get it. I am glad this talk helps in some way. You are loved and you are not alone sir. Thank you for commenting.
Zoi sounds like an amazing human, I feel like sometimes people like that are just too precious for the world and the only solace you can take is that they're no longer in pain.
The rates of suicide are continuing to climb, more and more people are going to have to deal with the aftermath. Like you said, we all do it in our own time. In our own ways. It can be consuming but it can also give way to a new path. I found your ability to process what happened to you and how you comforted Zoey's friends to be pretty admirable. You are a really beautiful human.
that’s all I can think going thru the comments is HOW MANY PEOPLE are dealing w the same thing. We need global REST. everyone exhausted of playing pretend whether we see it or not );
This has got to be the worst thing a parent could live through. Truly sorry for your loss Eric, it sounds like Zoi had a beautiful and gentle spirit and I'm sure it's still in the universe somewhere.
It IS hard to wrap ones head around this and I hope that no other fathers have to experience this. I can tell you that I love Zoi as much as I did the day she was born. That warms my heart these days knowing that love never dies.
Grief is such a world changing process to go through - this man clearly has a beautiful perspective and is doing his best to make a difference. We appreciate you Eric!
I lost my son of 24 yrs old to suicide on the 29th June 2020. I really can't see how i can carry on met someone and live a happy life. Its so hard the pain is unreal. Your video is so what I needed to hear. All my friends and family say I'm doing well and they are proud of me but behind the smiles and the tears I come home alone and then go to pieces
Hi Jo Jo - I get it. This is all so very fresh for you. Everything I spoke about in my talk, it was because of my journey. I didn’t have the capacity early on to put my life back together. The good news is, you don’t have to walk this path alone. Sending love to you.
5 mins at a time.Deep breathe work,Cold showers,stay in your body as my Dr.says..You don't have to do anything dear..Be very gentle to yourself .Light a 🕯️ every 🌃 night,pray. Perhaps plant a beautiful tree in his name .Love & Light❣️🌅💪
@@livebeyondloss I have been learning that strong is not muscles, strong is being open to whatever comes your way and dealing with it in kindness, thank you sir, your talk inspires me to be better.
@@livebeyondloss thanks so much for this video, I just lost a dog I found as a dying puppy when she was only 2 weeks old and she just had to be euthanized today with heart & liver failure. I also lost my dad in a car accident when I was 15, these videos really help me to cope with all the questions and pain I have. Thanks alot Eric.
I can feel your pain my son commit suicide a year ago leaving 💔 behind his 3 beautiful children we all miss him so much 😢 and 6 months later my husband passed away too much pain 💔 this is so hard to deal with not having my son or my husband around 😢
My husband died by suicide 30 years ago- it was a terribly difficult time I'll never forget. Your words are inspiring to me all these years later, Eric. Thank you so much for sharing this after your unimaginable loss.
It's so hard not to blame yourself or ask if you did enough for the person you've lost but ultimately if they really want to die, nothing is going to stop them from achieving that.
First of all..bless this father for having the courage to speak of his daughter's suicide...and how we..those left behind..can go on. We lost our son, Michael, in 2009 a victim of suicide. I don't remember the first 2 years...time passes but it was like I was living in two worlds...a world of gut wrenching sorrow and one of a reality I was out of step with. Often just trying to breathe was all I could do. I had to survive for my husband and our other children. I don't say it is better..I tell people it gets easier to carry. My husband had lost a daughter to cancer before we met....how can he go forward after losing two children. ..I don't know. I guess I just clung to hope that someday all the pain will be turned to joy.
Sending a lot of love to you both. Similar to what you said, the sharp edges soften over time, but they will always be there. I appreciate the comment. ❤️
The fact that Zoey was a radiant source of inspiration to many, is highly noble and painful at the same time. True it is that people who are themselves suffering, donate the most by helping, giving them hope, listening, inspiring, being with them and through every way possible. It is because they know what it feels like to be depressed, so they try to allay others and find relief in their happiness. May Zoey's soul be at peace. You are a strong father, Mr. Eric and I believe your words will act as strength and hope for many. God bless you🙏
My daughter also hung herself in her closet. I couldn’t get the belt off her neck, I had to break the shelving down to free her but it was too late. We performed CPR for twenty minutes. She was 15 and had no signs of depression, no note, no understanding of why. I don’t think I can even go on from this. How do I survive? I miss her. I would do anything to have her back. I don’t understand. I have no joy left in life. My daughter is my everything. I just want to be with her.
I am so heartily sorry for your loss. Everything you wrote is exactly how I felt in the beginning too. I know this isn't easy, and maybe just focusing on day to day, if not hour by hour is what is needed here to survive. I'm sending you so much love. There are better days ahead.
I lost my oldest daughter in Jan 2019 to suicide. She was 24. FAITH has gotten me through this. I will share my story at some point. Thanks for this video and keep up your encouragement.
I'm sorry for your loss. Ive also lost both my children. Also my father recently. I'm completely alone. I really just don't have any reason or desire to get up or survive at all. Many people say that "faith" keeps them going. I don't understand why or how that helps? How can faith give me a reason to live? They seem like totally unrelated things to me. I have plenty of faith. Faith in existence of God. Faith in humanity. Faith in a benevolent afterlife where love will be something other than a harbinger of torturous, permanent pain for me. That faith just makes me question why on earth I choose to continue living on earth instead of moving on... I have faith in the earth, ground and sky as well. How can that help? So many say it is the reason they want to live. Can you help me to understand how to turn my belief in God into a desire to live this life in this physical body? Maybe I misunderstand what people mean by "faith"?
@@EricDenny hi! To me it's faith that you WILL see your loved ones again. Faith that your pain will develop into meaning. Faith in yourself to never give up. Faith in the promises of God, that He will sustain you and carry you through this. Faith that you will feel joy again. Faith that your heart will be healed and restored. I lost my son 7 years ago, he was 17 days old. I'm glad I'm on the other side of pain, I didn't think I would ever get here. Now I am in school to become a Therapist. I want to dedicate my life to help others who are in pain. My pain turned into meaning and intention to help others. I hope and pray that you get to the other side of pain too. My faith helped me get here. Please don't give up.
Hi Jodi I lost my older daughter in March 2019 when she was 21. I still feel guilty that she did suicide because i cold not teach her how to deal with emotions and stay strong. I feel i failed as mother. Everyday i apologize but nothing helping me. ...please help i want to come out of this guilt
What amazing advice for him to give to Jerry, and an incredibly example of what happens when we channel our pain into our passion and transmute all the energy of those emotions into creativity and productivity.
Jerry is still rocking out! But he's done an amazing job at working on his resilience over the last few years... He's an incredible person. Thank you for the kind words.
I lost my 4 month old Zoie March 25th 2018. Even called her zo-zo aswell. People that never experienced this dont know. Its april 2020 and i still cry everyday
8xhausted8 I know this is not easy for you. There are better days ahead and reconnecting yourself with love - of yourself, others and of Life will help.
I understand exactly what your going thru. My son died today. In 2 days he would have been exactly 4 months old...... I'm numb and I don't know how I'm going to on but I will cause that's what my son would have wanted me to do. I miss him....I miss the toothless smile and him cooing at me to get my attention. I can't be in the house
His daughter never saw how much all those people in her life that saw nothing but good and strength in her. If only people who suffer like this could see themselves through the eyes of their loved ones.
Thank you! I lost my 9 year old daughter to brain cancer 2 months ago. I know she is with us all the time. I know I will have a big hole in my heart forever, and I have to endure the pain for the rest of my life. I will be strong. I know that what she wants me to do.
It's so hard to explain what a loss like this feels like. So many unanswered questions and then underneath all that wondering if you did things differently there's the knowledge that nothing you could have done would have changed it. When people truly want to leave the world - apart from sitting with them and watching them every second - there's nothing we can do to stop it
Magalie - Thank you for saying this. I do wish we could reach into the lives of those who are struggling. Yes, SO many questions. What I've found is that those questions of "Why?" won't get answered fully, but the questions of "What?", will get answered because it's up to us to answer those. Not only that, you heal and build strength/resilience in taking these steps.... For example "What am I going to do about my grief?" Or, "What am I going to do to help others?" "What is something that I can do today for myself (because it's ok to do that?" ...
My darling loved son died this year 2021. I went to see where he suicided, yesterday. It was a more peaceful place than I thought. I feared it since February, it’s not that scary. I thought about what he was thinking that day, that morning on the way to work. I rode the train and back to where he died. I was almost happy to be there, I didn’t even cry. We have not had a memorial yet, it’s so daunting. He was so loved by all he knew, and hearts he touched. Thanks for reminding me we can continue to help each other. I’m finding strength again not as fast as I want, but hopefully fast enough. Love you son, forever.
Recently, one of my friends died in a 6x6 wreck at the age of 16. She was a lovely girl who left behind dozens of good people, including her parents. The preacher at her funeral talked about how when he told her father about how God must've taken her for a reason, which he responded "Why would he take her?" which we all knew that she brought so much happiness in his life. I've told a lot of people that the best thing they could do is move on and grow, but here I am in their shoes, too. R.I.P. Alana Parker "Laneybug" August 13th, 2004 - May 12th, 2020
In listening to this talk, I wonder why we have this burden to carry, this loss to lose, this joy to remember. Life has texture, depth, emotion and I can't help but wonder how much of it is real. The power of creation is always at play in our lives.
We really do all process so differently. What a beautiful soul this man is, his journey has no doubt been a very difficult one - and to want to help people the way he does, despite his loss... Beautiful. Just beautiful. Thank you Eric.
Ahhh the stories about her wake and all her friends saying lovely things about her had me in tears, especially right after her saying how she really didn't have any friends.
Reading the comments for this is just as inspiring and heartbreaking as the talk itself. So many people seeking connection and comfort after such traumatic loss, and so much strength to continue to live. My heart goes out to all of you.
suicide has affected my family too, and it's very heartening to hear folks out there doing their best to help people get through their own losses. thanks, Eric.
@@livebeyondloss it genuinely helped immensely. My family lost my father to pancreatic cancer last month on the 14th. At the beginning of Oct. 2020 his medical team gave him a general 3-6 months terminal diagnosis. He held on for 3x longer than their best case scenario. A few weeks after my dad's diagnosis, my wife received a terminal diagnosis for End Stage Liver Disease (ESLD). We were told she had a maximum of somewhere south of 2 years but more than likely it would be less than 1. We inadvertently saw some correspondence between a specialist we'd seen and a rep from an organ & tissue bank where the specialist had stated she would be "absolutely shocked" if she was still here come Halloween. Well she held on until after Halloween and even past her birthday which was the day after Thanksgiving this year. I know she was looking at holding on until Christmas but last Thursday at 2 minutes before noon she just couldn't do it anymore. Mornings and earlier in the day are hardest now that I wake up with just the cat in bed with me and I try not to let myself stay that way for too long. I give myself a good amount of time to let as much out as I can but my wife wouldn't want me to stay in that sad place all the time. Most days there's some catalyst that brings me back to the real world like a large truck driving by or hearing the mail being delivered. Today it happened to be your Ted Talk autoplaying immediately after whatever the previous video was that I'd completely lost interest in. I apologize for the long response but if you made it to this point then thank you again so very much. I didn't learn anything that I didn't already know besides your incredibly inspiring story. Your video helped me to remember some things that I totally didn't realize I really needed to remember right now. I don't know why I just put all of this out there but I genuinely do not feel like it was all for nothing or that I've wasted any of my time doing it.
Mae - Sending you a lot of love. I know this is not easy and thank you for the kind words. There is a light. We can move towards that light and still honor our loved ones. It’s ok to do both.
I read somewhere that just being born is like having a shovel of dirt thrown on to the spark within our spirit. It made me think of people I know who sound a lot like Zoi, and how much they struggled with life. I think for some people just existing in a world like this - one that's so different to what the natural order of things should be - it's just too much, just being here is too much pain for their beautiful, sensitive spirits.
Thank you Kristian. I agree that Zoi was highly sensitive yet also highly connected to the people in her life and to life itself. I’ve learned so much by being her dad. I appreciate your words.
I’m so blessed to find this now my beautiful nephew is gone after 3 weeks from suicide the last person you would ever imagine. I just feel so badly for their family. Thank so much
I'm sorry this hurt to watch, but please know that there is joy in honoring Zoi and my life at the same time now. It's ok to do both. Thanks for commenting here.
Thank you for the kind words. If someone is taking the time to watch this video, and taking time to comment in a helpful, supportive way, I feel it’s important to take the time to respond. I hope it helps in some way.
I truly dont know how any of you parents actually even begin to deal with, and make it through this level of grief and heart ache... youre all incredible ❤ i cant even deal with the loss of my fur baby 😭
Thank you for the kind words. A couple of years ago, I had to let go my fur baby, Bean. It was really difficult, but I was comforted knowing that very much like losing my daugther, it will be ok. An Animal's love for its human is unmatched. The good news is, love is every abundant. Animals show us this as well as most people. Sending love to you.
Resolve, recognising loss as in what we are missing when we lose someone. It has to be felt, recognised and appreciated. Kept in created everlasting pain.
Eric, thank you for doing what you do. I read these comments and I see your responses and my heart goes out to you. You are a beautiful soul and I know for a fact you're helping so many choose a different path.
Thank you Eric for your courageous story! I particularly loved the piece about heart songs and her being a "badass ukulele player" since music has healed me from the loss of my father. So grateful for the reminder to "get up" and not just "survive" but live those "heart songs" we are here to share. It sounds like her heart song will live on through you. Thank you for being a beacon for so many suffering from suicide and loss.
I buried my 17years old son Michael,just10days ago after loosing his life for leuchemia.I am down . God help me.i want to move on but is almost impossible to move on.
Love at it's truest. To have been through what Eric has and to now doing this work is a testament of his strength. This world is a better place for having had his beautiful daughter in it, even if only for a short while. Thank you Eric
Thank you, Sandra. I really appreciate the kind words about Zoi bringing so much to this world - even if for 15-years. She has touched so many lives. I am eternally grateful that I got to be her dad. :)
I wish it were unbelievable but I hear these stories far too often now. I am grateful to Eric for ensuring that he shares this message. It is very important.
