Parents can influence their kids if they have hidden agendas, so be careful brothers! When I pursued a Lebanese woman everything was fine, until the mom showed her racism and convinced the daughter of materialism to be happy. My side of the family was always pushed away from meeting them, my South Asian heritage was criticized and called inferior, and was told: "you need a 700k townhouse, a huge wedding and lease a modern car." Even though me and the girl had discussed living simply and traveling as our incomes were mediocre. Guest list went from immediate family, to everyone, minus my extended. Everything we agreed upon became an argument about the wedding and our future. Her parents had no vested interest in meeting my family as they wanted a ATM machine, not a son-in-law. Moral of the story: don't compromise and let someone gaslight you with the "mahr is my haq," line to break your back to marry someone who only wants money. Choose a woman who fears and loves Allah (SWT) first, not this dunya. I pray for all my brothers and sisters looking for righteous spouses, and I ask the same. Aslamoalaikom Warahmatullahi Wabarakatu
"Mahr is my Haqq" - Well so is my right to walk away 😂. It's just like in business, you ask for ridiculous prices and you either get no customers or one naive customer that doesn't know any better. Then they give up with their business because "it's not profitable". Similarly I reckon the sisters who ask for high mahr will end up miserable in a couple years one way or another, be it because they're looking for a sugardaddy and nobody is falling for their shallowness, or because the guy who was silly enough to pay their extortionate mahr has problems.
@myownbasement very very very true. I got married for £500 in the UK and we did pizza party for 15 people. Simple and quick. Why can't most of the ummah do it like this.
A serious problem in our community is making expensive the nikkah. I get it about the mahr but y does it have to be so high, why cant we marry for deen and prosper together
If divorce will happen...... Then who will protect women??????....... In this case very high mahr could be a source of security for divorcee women........... And now a days no brothers or father care about divorced sister or daughter......... Thats why high mahr is important.
Nah.. I ain't saying she a gold digger... 😅 We have literally made Halal haram and haram halal. Wild figures from some of these families and sisters. Appreciate millionaires are different, but average Joe should never be put under such pressure. Literally encouraging zina. 🤦♂️
As a woman, those mahr prices are ridiculous. What do we need 100k-150k for mahr for? 😒 Those prices don't make sense to me... May Allah guide us all. 🙏🏼
If divorce will happen...... Then who will protect women??????....... In this case very high mahr could be a source of security for divorcee women........... And now a days no brothers or father care about divorced sister or daughter......... Thats why high mahr is important.
@sammyjahanmunshi3555 Oh absolutely, I agree. That's why when he said if the Muslim brother is a multi millionaire then 100k-150k mahr should be expected since he can afford it. But in the case of a Muslim brother not being able to afford it is a different scenario.
@@sammyjahanmunshi3555This is definitely some to look at. Recently saw a terrible situation where the husband is millionaire and she has helped and worked for him for ten years and he has divorced her at least twice and she gets no payment for her job in the company and gets threatened to go away with her kids to the streets with nothing.
Sincere advice to brothers. Please go overseas and marry refugees, they will have more adab, more shukur, more respect, more deen also you will do the ummah a service.
Yeah that’s true. When you marry abroad the mahr is super cheap since Western currencies go a long way in third world countries.. But you don’t have to marry a refugee 😂. The girl’s family can be a normal educated middle class family, nothing wrong with that. They just have to be humble and properly practicing Muslims. It’s actually a bad idea to marry a poor girl from back home because her family will just beg you to send money home. Yes, they’ll exploit you. Not every poor person is pious. Go for a family that is already in a decent shape financially instead.
@ Read my comment again. I said MIDDLE CLASS. Not rich. Do you not know how to read? Listen, I have poor relatives back home who live in a village. They don’t pray their 5x salah, nor do they fast. They drink alcohol and do drugs. I’m not giving money to such low class people. And yes, I’ll also add that you should avoid upper class families too. That’s the class where most secular liberals in Muslim countries come from. Are you even married? And do you realize the risks that marrying abroad entails? I really shouldn’t have to take such risks but the vast majority Muslim women in America are absolutely horrible human beings. And the very few good ones I’ve encountered are not attractive at all. Since no one here meets my standards, looks like I have no choice but to search overseas.
why don't people set mahr equal to 3 months salary. That makes the the whole ordeal way easier. The people who are filthy rich do not have a mahr problem.
Ibn Majah (1887) narrated that `Umar ibn Al-Khattab (may Allah be pleased with him) said: “Do not go to extremes with regard to the dowries of women, for if that were a sign of honour and dignity in this world or a sign of piety before Allah, then Muhammad (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) would have done that before you. But he did not give any of his wives, and none of his daughters were given more than twelve Uqiyah. A man may increase the dowry until he feels resentment against her and says, ‘You cost me everything I own, and caused me a great deal of hardship’.” (Classed as authentic by Al-Albani in Sahih Ibn Majah, 1532)
I mean it's there right to ask for what mahr they want the same way it's the husband's right to marry more than one wife but we don't talk about that because the sisters are hypocrites.
if you're a businessman, it's your right to price your product whatever you want, but asking for an extreme price is ridiculous, that's called exploitation. Same way with marriage, actually Islamically, marriage is a contract in fact. If you ask for ridiculous prices, you are only shooting yourself in the foot and pushing away brothers who are gentlemen and would treat you perfectly. Either you might get some rich guy who's gonna match your mahr but he might not be suitable, or nobody at all, just like in business, where someone may be naive enough to buy your overpriced product. But you know what happens in the meanwhile? Because many women are doing this without providing any extra value for the higher mahr, brothers are realising they're getting nothing out of this, it's just inflation of mahr. Then they marry abroad and we end up with sisters wondering "Why are there no good men/brothers left in this Ummah"
If divorce will happen...... Then who will protect women??????....... In this case very high mahr could be a source of security for divorcee women........... And now a days no brothers or father care about divorced sister or daughter......... Thats why high mahr is important.
@@sammyjahanmunshi3555 the mahr is not a protection against divorce and never was. This is what things like zakah, family, etc.. is for. Also, there is a period where the woman stays in the husbands house after the divorce. This is one of those reasons why Muslims should have never settled in the lands of the disbelievers because it really puts women in a disadvantage and causes fitnah. Anyhow, this is not an acceptable reason to drive up the mahr and it's unfair. It's like stealing someone elses food because the government doesn't give you enough money for food. What did that other person do to deserve this? Lastly, by driving up mahr like crazy as it is happening now, you're only pushing men (and women) away from marriage so divorce doesn't even come into question. We already have hardly any Muslims (let alone Non-Muslims) getting married the halal way these days, theyre all in relationships or wait for an eternity, having done some sort of haram activities at least.
@joshrentos216 how is it? I just don't want to be asking or expecting such a high mahar. Its Arabs who are well known for this. Liking putting a buying high price on a lady. I refused a shami girl in Saudi once when she said its all on the man. That smelled like like the Saudi way. Marriage is not supposed be expensive. In Egypt and Morocco men are getting late and women who they saving up for marriage and the salary is low. Why not just do a simple mahar. But no, we have to be Arab. Lol I just thank Allah I am not and nor am I wanting to marry a Arab woman or any woman from the Muslim world. UK quick and simple.
@@chadspinnox566 the prophet (SAW) was Arab and you lot are saying alhumdullilah you’re not Arab? It’s one thing to be happy you are the person you are but to be grateful you’re not Arab is so disrespectful it’s disgusting. Who are u people? I hope this channels followers don’t think like u people
The mahr of one of the best woman of Islam Fatima (ra), 1 of top 4 woman of Jannah, daughter of Prophet (Sa) was 1750 grams of silver that will be around 2k to 3k now. Even Rukaiya (Ra) who married one of the richest man of that time Umar was the same (as much as I've learned all of the daughters of Prophet (Sa) had the same amount of mahr). What makes these women so entitled to ask for a amount more than theirs'? What makes their father think that they can ask for such a lavish amount for their daughters? Are their daughters better than the best women of this world? Did they raise their daughter's better than how the best man of this world did? What literally makes them think so?
If divorce will happen...... Then who will protect women??????....... In this case very high mahr could be a source of security for divorcee women........... And now a days no brothers or father care about divorced sister or daughter......... Thats why high mahr is important.
The Sunnah is to reduce the Mahr as well. The Prophet ﷺ said: “The best of marriage is that which is made easiest.” (Narrated by Ibn Hibban) The Prophet ﷺ said: The best of Mahrs is the simplest (or most affordable).” (Narrated by Al-Hakim and Al-Bayhaqi) Ibn Majah (1887) narrated that 'Umar ibn Al-Khattab رضي الله عنه said: “Do not go to extremes with regard to the dowries of women, for if that were a sign of honour and dignity in this world or a sign of piety before Allah, then Muhammad (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) would have done that before you. But he did not give any of his wives, and none of his daughters were given more than twelve Uqiyah. A man may increase the dowry until he feels resentment against her and says, ‘You cost me everything I own, and caused me a great deal of hardship’. Abu Dawud (2125) and An-Nasa’i (3375) narrated from Ibn `Abbas (may Allah be pleased with him) that `Ali said: “I married Fatimah (may Allah be pleased with her) and said: `O Messenger of Allah, let me go ahead with the marriage.’ He said: ‘Give her something.’ I said: `I do not have anything.’ He said: ‘Where is your Hutami shield?’ I said, ‘I have it with me.’
@@sammyjahanmunshi3555 Mahr is not a protection money. Mahr is a gift from husband to the wife. It is a symbol that the man with all his sense is taking the woman as his wife, and he is mentally physically stabld to provide and protect the woman. He has the capability of being that women's guardian. Mahr is also like assurance towards the woman's guardian that the husband will take good care of his daughter and he doesn't have to worry. Mahr is very romantic and spitual but the world has made it commercial and like business. Mahr isn't protection money. Muslims don’t get married with the idea that they will get divorced in future. We get married to make a family and stick togather through all highs and lows. Now if a woman suspects she might get divorced with this man why is she marrying him in the first place? If a father suspects this man might leave his daughter why is he allowing him to marry his daughter? Then asking for tons of mahr as protection. Also high mahr is 99% of the time demanded by those women who are already financially secure. In the name of financial security these women try to downplay their love for money and materialisticness. It is stupid to think a man will pay the high mahr if he wants to divorce that woman. You really think men are that nice. If a man wants to divorce a woman he won't even want to pay the high mahr. He will just leave that woman in her parents place. Not contact with her at all. Just simply leave her and be divorced only if she applies or worst make her life hell in his home so that she leave herself.
@@humayaislam9671No one marries with the thought of divorce........ But unfortunately in many cases divorce is the only solution..... And now a days no father or brother would take care of their divorced daughters or sisters........also you men want housewife,and if suddenly that housewife is get divorce........will she beg on the street????. If you men want to take house wife then be ready to pay high high mahr as protection.................otherwise girls will never agree to become housewife.
They go back to their family who will take care of them. What your suggesting is ridiculous, that men take a huge debt burden to start their marital life.
@@Filming-and-Stuff you know what's interesting? They're not only showing they have no self-respect and dignity but they're also part of the reason why most women are the way they are nowadays. I don't want to shift all the blame to the brothers, especially being a guy myself, but if the followers don't listen, chances are there is something wrong with the leader, and women naturally want to be led by a man. Women are very similar to children in many aspects, if you let a child do whatever it wants and don't nurture it, you can easy predict that this child is gonna be wasted once it's an adult.
Oooor marry a Muslimah from a foreign country.. A few hundred dollars can go a long, long way back home. Why pay 30-40K in America to a mid-tier who who is loud, opinionated, rude, and kind of overweight… When you can get a Muslim wife back home with haya, modesty, piety, and of course good looks for just a few hundred dollars? Ka-ching! Now THAT’S what I call a great deal! Economics 101, baby 😎
The problem is that many, if not most, of these women and their families put their "precious" culture first, second, and third, and have little regard for the Deen. Even then, most of them don't have enough knowledge of the Deen to differentiate between their culture and the Deen. Then if you ask them where they get such and such thing from, they'll say "Oh, it's from our culture" and they place the utmost importance on it. If you try and tell them what the Deen says, they'll dismiss it.
Like.. having a reasonable mahr between 10k - 30k maybe more always negotiable. this gives both parties the opportunity to focus on the major task at hand, creating an environment for a successful marriage and growth through maturity... nay Allah subhana wa ta ala give us all tawfiq and to draw ever closer to the Haqq and to the way of the Prophet Muhammad ﷺ
The mehr is the woman's, not the woman's family's or father's, so why would it be makruh for her to set her own mehr? This is very far reach if this conclusion has been reached simply from the fact that the Prophet saw said that the best of women are the ones who are easy going with mehr. This does not mean that a woman setting the bar for what she is entitled to is makruh. Women have done their own business for centuries, women should not be infantilised and demonised for making their own propositions. Walis are there to negotiate, facilitate and advise on the woman's behalf, not make final decisions in what is a contract that involves only her and her future husband.
Assalamualikum Sheikh, Pleass for the sake of Allah, make videos on these topics in ordee to give dawah ti hindus(veg people) & christianity : 1. Why Islam allows innocent animals to kill the animals and eat ( they claim that we have the choice to choose therefore we choose not to kill animals for our taste buds but Islam is cruel) please give a logical answer to this. 2. Once I was giving dawah to a christian, mentioning about all the scientific proofs from the Quran but the guy straight away denied that all these are from satan, even the veda/ Gita or othex scriptures have some scientific proofs like bermuda triangle n all 3. Hindus claim that their religion came the first and so is the truth
@@mogainz No, they usually reveal it themselves. Through their words or their actions. If your brother found someone, it’s an exception. Not the norm for the majority.
@whyzee007 unfortunately brother the Muslims have abused the deen. Men are not taking care of their responsibilities and claiming their wife should obey. Women asking men to jump through hoops 6pack 6figures 6ft 50k wedding 50kmehr. Honestly all the brothers I know married to Christians never had this many problems.
