I remember when my ex ghosted me for no reason at all. I didn't say anything cos at that point, I had had my full of his inconsistencies and nonchalant behaviour. I deleted his contact and erased his existence from my life. About a month later, he started to call me to get closure on why I stopped talking to him. Almost 5 years later now and he still keeps calling and messaging me talking about how he misses me of which I don't even give a single fuck cos he barely even exists to me. People wanna play games with genuine people till their game backfires on them and they become the ones on their knees.
Mirror their silence/ match their energy… never nag or chase a man bcs they run and take you for granted….. keep moving and if they don’t reach out to you…… he’s immature or toxic
@@ramonaherring4271 African movie is offensive I'm Puerto Rican 100%. I know for a fact I Got Roots African and Ghana in my blood so all races are the bomb
1-Do not beg or ask why 2-always address the behavior but never the emotions 3- Identify what u saw and how you felt about what u saw. 4- Use the: "If u were me' technique.
I was always told I was a different type of woman because I would approach a man, or the man I just happen to be in a relationship with in the same exact way, you’re speaking of.
I just want to tell you hands down this is the best approach. Thanks Coach 😊 I havent used it but i know this would work in a dating, even a family/work situation. Thanks so much
Did the same thing Got into a relationship barely a week He began to host me,i told him how everyone who did same thing with me ended up coming to plead with me Vum I blocked and deleted his number
I try to agree with this but I have a male friend who really likes this girl he’s dating. He tells me he wants to spend time with her but he has to make ends meet. He works hard to take her to nice places but he’s limited. So this can be confusing for a man who isn’t playing games and really working. Some men are busy and it has nothing to do with his level of love for her. I’m busy and I don’t play games but I care for someone who I can’t see often 🤷🏾♀️
Well I needed this 6 months ago! I caught a mf lying to my face and I called them out on it with my proof & sure enough they ran after taking a week or so to figure things out in their brain. I was told they were no longer interested & yes I did express myself after because I was hurt hurt. I just don’t understand why man put so much effort into something/someone and build a connection only to lie than run cuz they are guilty af! But I’ve backed off cuz I know my worth. I don’t have kids and I make six figures! I can do without all the lies but I miss them
My boyfriend ghosted me a year ago after being with him for 15 years. I did exactly that I stopped communicating and pulled my energy back. He still hasn’t reached out, but at least I still have my dignity.
A man who loves a woman will not ignore her, period. So if he ignores me I will step back & he will lose me. I don’t play these controlling mind games. I will only be with a man who values & appreciates me because I am a good woman who knows my worth.
Not necessarily men are completely irrational when it comes to Love. They can be in Love yet withdraw due to their own insecurities. This is why we are all listening to dating coaches on RU-vid.
- A man trades his time for the things he values! - A man doesn’t change his behavior unless something has changed in his life! - Do Not REWARD “Bad” behavior!
A man did this to me, we had been texting for some weeks & he kept “trying to plan a date” but he never did.. he asked about my availability & then never answered & he randomly ghosted me for 2 weeks straight… I simply never texted, called or pleaded… I let him be. He came back after 2 weeks like Nothing happened, asking how my day went & said “Sorry I was outta town for a bit for work” So I simply waited 6 hours & then texted him : “I understand you got busy with work but Its obvious you may not value my time. While I would have liked to have been told this directly through proper communication, I still wish you the best in your future dating pursuits !” He called me IMMEDIATELY .. apologizing & started explaining a whole story about family Issues, mom being sick randomly & etc… I still decided to move forward. Bc he could’ve communicated that
They 😂 always call immediately when you hold them accountable for ghosting or not communicating but not letting your emotions get the best of u. U did good and I’m glad u stood on business.
Sadly, most females are emotional creatures. When a woman learns how to get her emotions under control and match the energy that is being given. Then, that’s when she gains power. Never chase, never ask why, but always keep your head to the sky. Don’t allow yourself to fall in a hole, because of a man. Always love yourself enough, to know when it’s time to fall back. Never allow a man to drag you through the mud, because you are just as important as he is. Don’t question anything or anyone, move on to the next.
No you don't ladies. Never tell a man to call u in a timeframe. Let him show u. Who he is. How he feels. If u here, watching this. U already know your outcome.
Usually when they do this they are cheating or dealing with another woman. It's pretty simple. They all suck . Just disappear like a ghost when they do this and never respond again.
Not always. Maybe for a player, but I usually ignore women I like because maybe I'm just not in a talkative move. So I would rather keep my distance plus most women chase men now.
@@beachlover9705 look at today's attraction methods bro. It's usually 85% of the time the woman initating phone numbers, dates, or talking to the man first. 40 years ago it was opposite the man was the one who showed interest in pursuit. Now to clear up my opinion on why a Guys is silent, sometimes as a man it helps me eliminate foolishness. Now the difference between a player and a real man is that a player will lead a woman on with lies, a real man is going to tell the truth and lead by example and there's no gimmicks behind his action. Real men want Real women too, so if this lady or women are use to playing games it may not go past friendship
I experienced this recently… I dated this guy for almost a year and this past Monday I listed all the things he wasn’t doing anymore. He ignored all my messages and I have not heard from him again. We are broken up because he has a toxic way of dealing with conflict in a relationship. I deserve so much more!
@ChildrenOfLightMinistries Your honesty is courageous. 🙌🏾🙌🏾🙌🏾 The blessing is you know and are aware of where you are. Hopefully and prayerfully, you have begun taking steps to truly heal and be set free.🙏🏾🙏🏾🙏🏾
Even better! I just blocked, delete, and move the fk on. Treat him like he dead. Move the fk on and never look back and give any more energy and attention 💯. Peace the fk out! I'm so sick of how he has been treated me. I'm so fn done. ✌
If They Don't Reciprocate Take The Break. if they show no interest just leave it be no matter how much you align with each other and you love and care for them.
Leave him alone for good, every time he meet or see someone new he’s interested in he will ghost you over and over again because he is confused, if it dont work out with the new person he will try to come back, every man got and is dealing with someone he didn’t meet you and was interested in you and you only
Why to be behind a man is ignoring u.. When a guy is ghosting ir because obviously he is seeing someone else. When the guy do this I just delete and block him. Move on.. Life is too short to wait for a ghost when u can lose many other opportunities... Is what I do.
If a man ignores me, gives silent treatments, or is just breadcrumbing i will warn him 1 time i wont tolerate that behavior and if he doesnt heed that warning i walk away i will breakup and never look back. Even if it hurts like hell. Ive learned the hard way not to tolerate this.
@@marrie_may talk through your feelinfs with good friends or a therapist, and process them. Sometimes it takes a while but that over the moon butterflies feeling that you miss is not love its infatuation and anxiety. That feeling in the extreme is a red flag that this person is not good for you longterm and that feeling is actually addictive. A real, healthy relationship that feeling is still there, there is still chemistry but not as strong as a toxic connection and you feel safe and at peace. Just keep reminding yourself of all the bad times, all the time he didnt text you back for hours or days, all the dates he canceled and how that felt, and how it felt when you needed him and he disnt show up. In a good relationship your partner will not make you feel that rollercoaster of highs and lows. But longterm you will be happier and more emotionally healthy. It helps if you can learn to spot the warning signs like inconsistency early on before you are super invested and walk away then, even if there is alot of chemistry.
@@marrie_may oh the memories and flashbacks suck, when you start reminiscing about the good times you had with them also remind yourself of the bad... The times they didnt text or call for days, the canceled dates, whatever they did to hurt you. Keep reminding yourself of that. Those behaviors are not treating you like a queen. Also build your own self esteem, thinking that youll never find someone who will treat you well comes from a sense of low self worth. You can find better. Stop chasing chemistry, super strong chemistry in the beginning is a big red flag that you are being love bombed or that there is a push pull dynamic. Both of which are toxic.
The guy i was recently talking to well wasted my time on was all the wrong things for me. I wasted a year and a half of my Life on this immature guy. He recently told me let's have some space and see what happens so i said fine and i hung up and i haven't spoke to him since that day. We haven't reached out to one another and i'm okay with that. I was drained of him emotionally and mentally trying to Communicate with a guy who wasn't capable of being able to Communicate like an Adult. STAY SAFE EVERYONE. GOD BLESS US ALL 🙏🏽 🙏🏽.
If you can go a day without speaking to me checking on me to see if I’m alive keep going not chasing nothing but my bread and butter ! Just dum my boyfriend keep the childish games over there I’m not a checker broad ! I’m a queen I will not tolerate that madness! 🙌🏾
MESSAGE HIM! DON'T MIRROR HIS BEHAVIOR! CAUSE THEN YOU WILL BE TRAPPED IN A CYCLE OF MIND GAMES. WHEN YOU MESSAGE HIM IT WILL HELP YOU TO DECODE IF HE IS A JERK OR A GENUINE MAN. IF HE DOESN'T RESPOND DELETE HIS MESSAGE AND CONTINUE WEIGHING YOUR OTHER OPTIONS.
I actually feel like if mirror their behaviour, you are letting them control you. He keeps quiet, you keep quiet. When hes good and ready then communicates, you also communicate back or you dont communicate. If he is dealing with someone else on the side, he actually wont care or even notice that you are palying these games
1. Dont beg your lover nor ask them why theyre silent. - mirror his silence 🔕 until hes ready to communicate like an adult. If he doesnt take action, hes not right for you. 2. Address his behavior (not your feelings/emotions...ie 🚫"you made me feel") Discuss it from an intellectual direct point. 3. Use 'I' statements rather than 'you' statements. " I saw you did this and it made me feel this way.......I want this..." 4. "If you were me, what would you do if this happened" If the lover is not interested in resolve, hes not ready for a healthy relationship.
I noticed that you are not responding to my text ,I don't have a problem with you responding to my text , this explains should I continue calling or texting ? - I have noticed that you are pulling away ? That's fine - If you were me, what would you do if this happened? - if you were me what would you do to lie to me ?
Y'all I did it all wrong. I chased ,I begged, crying. I did it all. I feel like a fool. This was behind my ex husband who left me with our 2 small kids. I wish I had these videos
You were not a fool.. you were just inloved and was not appreciated. You were taken for granted. At least he left. There is some that never leave and make the wife's life miserable.
You stronger now and he will reap what you sow. You sowed tears he will reap them in a few years. Don’t worry hun you did all in according to your love. Never feel bad for loving just switch who you love. Your babies need that love. He will miss your love. Mark my words. He will reap pain. Don’t worry. Thank God you are free!
Very emotional and expressive! From my experience, when your partner ignores you, it means he doesn't respect you. And if there is no respect and communication - then why continue the relationship? This is not resuscitation! It's a one-sided game. Is it interesting for confident and fulfilled women? I think, no. Therefore, we close one page of the book and move on.
My husband has ghosted me and we live in the same house. Normally I would pursue him because the silence is killing me. This has been the pattern for 20 years. We usually come back together, but never really talk about what tore us apart. I can’t do that anymore. I’m not going back to the way things were. Our marriage counselor recommended we each get individual counseling. Our last counseling session we got “into it” and my husband walked out, came back 5 minutes later and said he would be willing to work it out if I get individual counseling and in a moment of self awareness he said he would seek counseling as well. I started laughing because I was sitting in a counseling session, while he was walking out throwing a fit. This really upset him. He left ,and I had to call an UBER to get home. I agree I need counseling and have since signed up and attended my first session. He has not signed up for counseling. I have to be ok with this. I’m not going back to the way things were. Only forward. This might be the end, so be it.
Why would you ask a man if you should continue to contacting him if he’s not replying to you 🤷🏾♀️This dude is giving out bad advice & his delivery is making yall listen 😂
OMG!!! THANK YOU SOOO MUCH!! I'VE BEEN DOING EVERYTHING COMPLETELY WRONG!! DATING IS SOOO DAMN HARD NOWADAYS! IT'S ALMOST WORTH MORE JUST TO STAT SINGLE.
I’m confused if he got silent he need time, if he abandons you he got another women. Like which one is it? Everybody giving different advice like this is why we as people so emotional and confused we don’t know what to do
My ex ignored my text and calls for 10 days. However, he has been inconsistent throughout our relationship. I did reach out in the 10 days he only responded once via text. I did screw up and text him that ignoring me was hurtful. I did call him because I wanted answers and he blocked me.. that was a cowardly action of him.. I feel so stupid for begging him.
Sometimes , u don’t need answers. He was entertaining other folks or have his mind not there mentally. Learn to create ur own closure and never be scare to walk way.
@@mercymuli8058 that’s what I have decided as well. That is not love and it’s better to give that love to myself. I’m doing things that I enjoy doing and being kind to me💜
You did nothing wrong!! Don't listen to these people. You had a right to ask him what was going on. Nobody has time yo play games and wait for a man to contact them. This guy was an immature coward, that had no respect for you or himself.
I don't put his number in my personally phone i have another number so if he ignores me I just throws that number away imediately! If he come back one day oops that number is not exist !!! Then if he saw me at the malls or somewhere the truth is I don't know him and I will scream for Help!!!!
I needed this video two days ago. I did the very thing you said not to do regarding emotions. I divulged too much about my feelings. I didn't ask, "If you were me" but I did say, "if the tables were turned".
Creating boundaries and make it become a way of life, that's the solution, it's a form of defense mechanism, don't let your guard down and just know it's god alone you can trust!!🙏
DR KEN!!! I haven't heard from this dude in 3-4wks and just ignored him. I sent the exact words on this video!! IT WORKED!! HE CALLED ME and I am so not interested. I AM GOING TO WATCH EVERY VIDEO. I'm getting ke a husband next year. This year imma spend spoiling me lol. Thanks Doc!!
Who has times to play these games? If I reach out to a man several times & he doesn't respond, f$ck him! Why would I ask him if I should keep texting/calling? He obviously doesn't care and neither should I.
Oh I'm gonna identify the behaviour express my feelings about it and move on.. I'm not going to deny how your actions has affected me.. If you don't adjust I'm out .. Simple as that . I can show you better than I can tell you
This doesn’t really apply to marriage only for courting situations….thank goodness I hated these kind games….for me marriage is free from these actions….just open communication and mutual respect….but those who are not there yet, I pray your journey as easy and that u find someone who is crazy about u and doesn’t avoid u.
I wished I watched this earlier hehehehe 😜 😂. Another dating coach said the same thing. Control ur impulse. Pull back. Slow down on communication and enjoy ur life
My mistake was that I showed my feelings. Like begging for time. And he showed me a pattern same bs..Now I don't feel anything anymore. I guess my tears and feelings dried out. I'm ok. God got me. They're a man meant for me.less drama.
Your mistake wasn't showing your feelings, your mistake was exposing your weakness to someone with narcissistic tendencies. He knew you wanted to so much that you literally had to resort to begging him for attention and affection. He knew it hurt and kept repeating it. That's when it's emotional abuse.
His behavior changed because he was cheating with his ex. I stopped calling him for a week. When he called, I told him i would call him back, when he called again i told him I would call him back, then i blocked him. Good bye 👋 like you NEVA seen it before.
The only thing I’ll take from this video is “if you were me” part, everything else is too much energy to give to someone move on. Life is too short to try and convince someone to stay in your life who doesn’t want to there.
I went no contact and when he tried to send me an email...I sent him a picture of a handsome guy I met on a dating site and said." He has a bigger boat than yours and I am going to see how it goes !!!! " Not putting up with this crap any more !!! :)
I have mirrored behaviour in the past. 😂 and the guy did a settled let me text less. So I started texting less back. 🤣 He said I’m also downplaying my emotions. I stop overly expecting and enjoy my time ❤ the moment.
They don't know the difference between real love and their love, they don't know the difference between being truly loved and buy supply even for money. They don't know the difference between real feelings and what they are feeling. They don't value real love and care as long as they can buy it for money or lies from other people. My ex narc always been miserable but pretended to be happy, I am sure he's miserable now but pretending to be happy. How do they know the difference if they never felt happiness , or love or compassion or empathy? Never have and never will! So there is no karma for them. We know the difference that's why we think that this is their karma, they don't care! We should not care either! Unless they get really sick and have nobody to care for them, they won't know the difference.
No lies detected always use logic when you are speaking to your man or men in general. when you do that they got to come correct they can't come no other way or they won't come at all but you will get your answers without having to hurt yourself through the process!!
I just did this before i watched this video i addressed his behaviour he tried to use the card " i didn't mean to hurt ya feeling's "😂😂 ( i never mentioned anything about my emotions) he assumed he did . he was reaching for a response i said nothing. He then tried the self pitty card by saying " i should just be by myself i always seem to hurt ppl" i said well i can't speak for your past but thats a question you need to ask yourself clearly cuz i don't av time for the BS😂😂 he said he will call me back 😂😂😂 wether he dose or not i think he realised im not one to play with.
😇😇 (Dr Apeh) I must say you have made me smile bringing back my lover NELLY has brought so much joy into my life and I must recommend such great work and all thanks to does who recommended he’s great work.👍.
@@CoachKenCanion** recap let's just say you help me pick up on stuff really quick... on to the next that was fast wasn't it? Your methods help a lot and I see things very clearly now! Those patterns I've created... Mercy... 😆
😇😇 (Dr Apeh) I must say you have made me smile bringing back my lover NELLY has brought so much joy into my life and I must recommend such great work and all thanks to does who recommended he’s great work.👍.
Yep I did that, kept txting why or lets talk about it,I finally gave up and feel so much better,2 months relationship was 2 long, Single life is Beautiful ❤
If I do the 3 things you told me to do would that mean I am chasing after him? I don’t want to look desperate. He has ignored me going on two weeks now what makes it so hard for me to ignore him is that we work together. How should I handle this?
