when the perfect girl stops being perfect | a Rory Gilmore deep dive 

To contrast in the sequel you have Paris, the brainy blonde, who did everything right. Went to school, married, had kids,(in that order) runs a successful business (centered around pregnancy) yet she's still unhappy, getting a divorce, hating her house, being vague with her children, suspecting Rory of sleeping with her husband. and contrasting that you have Lane who got pregnant, then married, and maybe she didn't make it with the band but they're still playing, still enjoying music, loving their kids and husband. Many different paths women take. There's no one perfect formula.

I don't mind her career struggles, but what I find really disappointing is how spoiled and entitled she became, she also seems not to have any morals. If she still was a nice character struggling in life, I'd be okay with that.

Also, Logan is NOT Christopher. And Rory is. NOT Lorelei. If anything, if we HAVE to conpare(and really, do we HAVE to?), Rory and Logan are closer to Emily and Richard

Rory used to be my role model 🥲📚

It’s no generational decline..not marrying is not a decline

I have another idea pf story telling: if rory goes with jess to New York after her first year in Yale and write the book gilmore girls and they lived happily ever after... but thats not realistic and it takes all this years and failures to at least end up with jess (my personal happy end) be a succesfull author and have a patchwork family...maybee get some more kids with jess

I really love Rory. She might not have ended to marry the man she love, yet she made a good role model to students as young Rory 💕

I think it is definitely a bit weird that TV shows and media like to use "pregnancy" as a way of making the typical smart, mature, "perfect" girl somehow "mess up". Why does it always have to be pregnancy that makes it an indicator that they've "failed" or ruined their life somehow? In my opinion, Rory didn't mess up because she got pregnant - she messed up because she lost her direction in life, hasn't matured or learned from her mistakes, and continues to show little self-awareness or conscience of how she is treating other people.

I think it’s not fair to be too hard on Lorelei for how Rory turned out. I think it’s more of her grandparents who caused her downfall. She was on a perfect oath until they came into her life offering her anything and everything and I think that’s when the entitlement began. She ran right back to the life Lorelei tried to escape from.

So yes, Rory was a studious girl and very driven to get a good education. BUT I think it was a bad sign that in the first episode of the entire series she is willing to give up Chilton because she met a cute guy (Dean)

Logan said it best. She wants to be the working class with tough childhood, who worked for everything she has, but she also uses her position of a rich grandaughter everytime it benefits her. I also think she chose the wrong career. Just because you like to read doesn't mean you'd be a good journalist. She never had the passion and drive to be good at that. She was too worried about what people think of her and lacked self awareness. I don't know why anyone thought journalism would fit her. I also think she didn't have much of a personality. When we met her, she was basically a more responsible copy of her mother. She talked like her and shared her opinions on most things. Then she would usually act like whoever she dated at the time. When she lived with her grandparents, she immediately began to act like Emily. I just don't like think she had what it takes. Logan and his dad (yeah, he didn't have to be so rude about it) were both speaking facts when they called her out

Lorelei showed the right amount of tough love when she needed to, at least in the original series. She let Rory know that she did not approve of her helping a married man cheat.

I'll be honest, I wasn't as good as Rory but am also a failed millenial. I still live a sheltered life and have no ability to struggle through difficulty without someone to help me. Excelling young academically will not always be a strength later on. All it does is terrify you of failure as you grow older. Children sometimes need to fail at school so they learn how to recover from it. They need to step out of their comfort zone. People who fail young are more likely to succeed when older. Atleast that is my experience. I think the show did a good job as showing her failing at life but she still didn't seem to accept responsibility for her own entitlement or realising why she isn't succeeding. But it really dies take a long time to step out of your own head.

i literally never cared about rory's "downfall". it wasn't a downfall, she just became an adult and you can't be impressive for the rest of your life. at some point, you have to just become a human being with struggles, and that's what happened to her. it's realistic.

Honestly its always baffling to me that so many people think Rory was such a nice and perfect girl in the early seasons. Remember how she treated Dean when Jess came into town? How she cheated on him (kissing Jess) without even any remorse?

Honestly I think Rory is realistic and the more I grow up, I realize that

I think Rory is like this because she feels like a burden to her mom. If she is perfect, her mom approves and has worked hard for something. But then Rory’s true self starts to come out. The mask comes off. Of course she’s not perfect and when she realizes this is when she is on her own and its too late. Maybe it’s a great opportunity for her to be her true self.

The problem with Rory is that all of them always tell her that she was perfect and that she could not do wrong. Even when Rory did a lot of shitty things she was hardly held accountable. So Rory did not learn about frustration and she cannot understand that she is not as speciall as they all told her she was.Her perfectionism is toxic if she is not good enough since the start she just give up and run away. In a way the portrait of Rory is actually very realistic. She is entitled since the beggining, her mom decided to be her best friend instead to put her limits and her grandparents gave her everything she wanted. Rory grow up thinking that she deserve it everything and that she cannot fail and in real live that's a very bad combination.

I think Rorie is desperately trying to live her own life while trying to live the life everyone thought her mother SHOULD have lived in other words to make up for what her grandparents thought were her mother’s failures……..since many could see her as the reason for her mother’s perceived failures AND ULTIMATELY……….she ends up feeling like a failure herself……HEAVY STUFF.

Really enjoyed this video! Personally, I think a lot of the vitriol for Rory in the revival is linked to two misconceptions, and I never see these discussed in these videos: that lives (and careers) are linear paths; and that your life is basically over by age 30. We catch up with Rory in her early 30s and are told she had some level of success as a journalist but is now going through a bit of a rough patch and feeling adrift. and people make the leap to she's a failure and she will always be a failure. Like, people, I beg you, chill. She's young. She has most of her professional life in front of her. We follow her through a year when she questions what she really wants and sets new goals and potentially starts a totally new career. Nothing in the narrative suggests this state Rory is in will be forever permanent, and yet people jump at her for failing their expectations.

rory is the girl i want to be, lorelai is the woman i want to become

If you were raised as the perfect girl, I hope you're doing well. You're probably suffering from constant anxiety, saviour syndrom, perfectionnism, constant self-doubt and a poor opinion of yourself. You dedicated your life and what you want to reflect to others, and when those people don't match your expectations to treat you as you treat them, you'll get heartbroken. Start an healing journey and become who you really are, it is normal to fail, and it is normal to have flaws. You have the right to be the person you truly are, and your surroundings need to recognize that and help you in this journey without judging you for not being a people pleaser anymore. Good luck ❤

I think my dislike for Rory comes from the fact how she betrayed Lorelai and being hypocritical about it. As soon as Rory got the chance, she took full advantage of her heritage, yet she still behave as if she was some kind of underdog. Lorelai manage to make a LOT from little and Rory managed to make very little with A LOT that she was given... Plus the authors built her up and made her TOO much intelligent, to then do all the stupid things she did and it took the show too long to realize that her actions should not be portrayed as something to root for. EDIT: I do agree with comments that Lorelai was also privileged - she could have basically go back to her parents any time she chose not to. BUT she chose not to and as far as I can remember with THE one notable exception was for her daughter - she never begged her parents for their help. Her being able to stay in the Inn where she worked as a maid, I do not really consider as a "privilege" - it just means that she was lucky as the owner had a good heart and it was a plot device how not to kill/have homeless 16 year old with a kid.

I think both Lorelai and Richard/Emily are both responsible how Rory turned out. Lorelai puts pressure on Rory to be perfect, but doesn't want her daughter to feel trapped like she felt. She spoils Rory, but so do Richard/Emily. They do almost the same thing, but are more controlling than Lorelai. When Lorelai tries to be a mom Rory goes running to Richard/Emily and they welcome her with open arms.

She was offered a job as editor somewhere but she turned it down for some big intership somewhere. She did not get the internship. She then tried to take the job but they already gave it to somone else. Rory always thought so high of herself in the end. She used the phrase but I'm a gilmore. That said it all.😢

There's always lots of talk about Rory's privilege, but not enough about how it should have protected her from millennial failure in the classical jobless, penniless way. Sure not everyone will succeed after attending an Ivy League, but as Rory herself said she's "a Gilmore. Do they know that?" In the end, Gilmore Girls is mainly a story about rich people's problems, with some middle class characters in the background. For her to be so adrift in her 30s she would have to either fuck up a job really bad or be clinically depressed for years, not just waiting for her big break to happen without any effort. So, when people agree this is how she would turn out, it feels like they agree Lorelai is a complete failure as a mother, which I find absurd. Rory doesn't have to be a completely useless adult to not be perfect. Now, there's two ways the story could've gone full circle that would make more sense to me: 1) around 2-3 months after season 7, Rory discovers she's pregnant while working and traveling like crazy on Obama's campaign trail. Logan is dating a french heiress introduced by his parents but is ready to drop everything to marry Rory and even his family supports the marriage now because they don't want a bastard grandchild, but she refuses and decides she can have it all while being a single mother. Until she discovers she has preeclampsia or something else as serious and is warned she's gonna have to slow down or risk her life, or the baby's, or both. She ends up failing miserably at reducing her workload and a big scare has her quit her job and go back to Stars Hollow. She gets a few other offers but at still too stressful jobs. And that's when she has to learn real sacrifice and settle down with the town newspaper's job because it's the only thing not exciting enough. Jess is around and gives her major support, we're teased that she's falling for him again. Kind of Lane's life. Which means they can let Lane tour with her band and become indie famous. Her mother becomes a surprise fan and even hires someone to train to take over the shop when she retires, maybe some distant relative she feels affinity for and who in turn values tradition too; still, they fight a lot. Could even be remarked as ironic that Lane left town and Rory's back, but really, you can be a writer (which, let's be honest, is Rory's real goal, not reporting the news) anywhere, being a musician isn't so easy in a small town. Rory decides to write the book when she's further along in the pregnancy, bored out of her mind with the lack of relevant news in town. 2) 10 years later, Rory's a journalist, married to some boring but equally successful guy she knew from Yale, meticulously planning to have a baby, living in NYC in a glamourous apartment, attending ridiculous charity parties because her boss forces her to. She's the absolute pride of her grandparents. It's the kind of life she chose when she kept going to them for help, and Lorelai despises it, so they've grown distant. Rory has regular lunches with Paris, who has been going to therapy for a decade and has learned to redirect her drive to her business, letting her personal life just be. She could be married with kids like in the show or single, she's content. Rory likes to see Paris but feels reminded of her own misery every time. Eventually she runs into Lorelai and breaks down. Quits her job, divorces and moves back in with her mother. Runs into Logan, has a one night stand and gets pregnant. Everyone assumes she's gone crazy, but Rory finally feels at peace in this chaos. Decides to write the book and not plan when and if she'll leave Stars Hollow. Jess feels the same way and they bond over it. Emily comes in and points out how she and Richard used their influence to get her a good job during the financial crisis and to ensure she got opportunities for growth in it. How they paid for her wedding to that wonderful son of a family friend. How they bribed an old lady to sell the apartment Rory and her husband wanted to live in. So how can she throw all that away? But she's alone in that big house now and decides she would rather keep mumbling all this to herself quietly and remain a part of her granddaughter's life.

Who else low key thought she’d have done better in the field if she married Logan cos she’d be able to name drop a Huntzberger 😬👀

I also think it’s good to show how growing up can be a struggle, just like relationships and jobs, but Rory also becomes less likable bc of the cheating etc

My mother also never had a stable relationship, but I've been happily married for almost a decade. Sometimes people just can't find a good match for them. It doesn't mean your children will have the same story.

I watched the episode last night where Logan’s dad told Rory she didn’t have what it takes to be a journalist. At first, and many times after, I thought he was cruel and manipulative. When I watched it last night I saw it through different eyes.I think he saw someone that didn’t have backbone. After Mitchell’s comments, instead of picking herself up, wiping herself off, and then going forward she chose instead to give in and wallow. Had she rebounded she could have proven him wrong and felt good about herself. So, the end result for Rory in the show should be no surprise. Rory lacked grit and real world determination. For those who are less perfect mortals we constantly pick ourselves up and move in. I had a boss who would say sometimes you just have to eat the frogs. -Great advice- It’s not making mistakes but how you handle them, in which Rory never did well. Through out the show.

Many are confused after college and don’t find the dream job right away. She is finding herself and that part is ok. What I really hated was her having sex with Dean when he was married. Then she says no to Logan’s proposal and then is the other woman again, so wrong. Rory should have learned from her mistake with Dean and not repeat the pattern with Logan. We have to remember Logan’s family did not approve of her, and I think she knew that wouldn’t be good for her. Jess was her soulmate, I hope we get to see this be true.

I personally hate all the hate her charater is getting. I think she was written realistically. These things do happen in life. And everyone saying that she’s so privileged and should have succeded because of that. Just because someone has financial support doesn’t mean they will succeed in life or that it will be easy for them. It’s a lot about emotional support and genuine belief in yourself, motivation, your wishes … She was always a “good girl”, the golden child and there are A LOT of challenges and problems that come with that. I think she’s written realistically.

There's nothing interesting, especially in comedy, about watching a perfect person who never expressed flawed opinions or behaves badly. The same people who lambast Rory for "falling from grace" and "becoming a failure" would probably find her character boring and insipid if she lived up to their standards.

Ngl i like her passion for education/study but her personality????? Yucks. I’m not THAT surprised to see how she turned out to be this way when grown up. Rory reminds of the girl I don’t like in high school. That girl (my ex classmate) is smart, high performance student, pretty and LITERALLY perfect but she have so much EGO and PRIDE and most of the time she speaks to ppl a little bit rude/blunt.

i think what this and a lot of analyses don’t mention is that rory was such a people pleaser and rule-follower that she didn’t develop her own values and internal strength. on the other hand, we see that jess is incredibly successful and happy on his own terms. he was always a rebel and people said he’d be ‘a failure.’ he charted his own path and loves his life. rory’s only career goal was to do something “prestigious” without really having direction. jess doesn’t care about prestige and his life would be considered ‘failing’ by many people’s standards. but he’s financially stable and gets to be creative and share his passions with his friends and community, which brings him happiness. all in all, my take is that rory lacks a sense of identity which means she will never know what she wants and will always be unhappy.

I really don’t like how everyone just casually ignores how Rory was *parentified* by Lorelei. Meaning she has childhood trauma from her mother treating her like a best friend, not a daughter. Rory needed a mom, not a best friend. People who like this show glorify childhood trauma…

I dont think she was a "mature girl", she was studious and booksmart, but that doesn't mean mature, she was always very judgy, and behaved in a very teenager way, because she was, her outcome is very realistic for a "gifted girl" who never really faced any struggles so didnt learn how to overcome real adult life situations, but even if she could, sometimes life just turns out that way, nothing wrong with that

Rory isn't perfect and it humanize her and make her a complex character. Nobody is perfect in real life too.

There should be more characters like the "old" Rory as a teen, just focused on school and reading, I loved her

Lorelai was not really a parent, at least compared to most parents I know, but I still liked her and Rory just started getting worse but I like the comparison to Julie. It's just as strange how she got worse over time, both are maybe just changing due to their circumstances

um lorelai criticized her for having sex with dean. it caused a big fight between them. and you said that lorelai didn't criticize rory for it.

with all these generational cycle im actually scared if i ended up being like my parents :/

I find it a show being about generational trauma: the narcissist, privileged Baby Boomer raising the rebellious Gen Xer, who raises her Millennial around the chaotic mix of her enmeshment and her parent’s narcissism. Rory is constantly in environments where she is the Golden Child/Valedictorian role, and when she does mess-up she is never really fully held accountable for owning her mistakes, repairing damage she causes, nor learns or grows in the aftermath. Even when a teacher tries, she’s given a way to have an out, while other students aren’t. The one time she she doesn’t - the court system - the narrative is framed as being unfair towards because the judge is making her an example. Rory is where she is in her 30s because her grandparents and parents never got therapy they really needed, and neither did she. The Year in the Life special highlights the continuation of someone going into parenthood without doing the necessary emotional work to be a decent parent. Almost all the supporting characters in the show have growth and development of some kind, but the Gilmores just end up being the same old Gilmores.

lorelai was always my rolemodel ❤️

I'm also glad she turns out this way, just to show everyone life isn't this easy, for no one

i’m in college. in high school (never went private tho!) i had smoke blown up my ass because i could read well. in middle school, i was deemed proficient enough to take the seminar and AP classes in high school. In science, I was proficient enough in seminar chemistry for high school. Surprise surprise, in high school I’m sucking at English because despite trying to fill all the criteria to answer an essay prompt, my wording is “long and boring.” In chemistry, we did mostly science and minimal math. Now i’m failing (below a C- my college chem gen and chem lab classes despite only being a week in.) i feel just like rory because the adults in my life inflated my ego and told me i could do anything, even things that were much to difficult and put me behind other kids. Maybe some kids were actually lucky and proved they deserved those spots, but I was incredibly young thinking i was some sort of genius just for doing easier work i was supposed to be doing anyway. everything in middle and high school was all about tests, and of course i can apply myself, but somehow in everything but the major i actually care about (chemistry.) similar to rory getting disappointed she got a D in English because she wanted to be a journalist. I can’t get in to pharmacy school with my grades as shit as they are rn. I’d be depressed and dye my hair pink too.

Ending up like rory is MY WORST NIGHTMARE

seeing Rory’s downfall makes me think about the fact Lorelai did what she had to do she HAD to escape from her parents life in order for her daughter to grow up or otherwise if she hadn’t been pregnant with Rory she would be basically exactly live her parents life which I am glad that she didn’t take it

I think it makes sense they had her change like that when you parentify children they do tend to have trouble growing up past the age they matured at

currently going to yale rn, and im also worried that all this hard work and pressure will amount to a latin degree that gets me nowhere😭

I dont expect her to be perfect... I just dont like in the revival she still sleeping with married men... And cheating.

I think Julie became a more well rounded person when she got her half-brother MJ. I've noticed IRL only-child kids have so much more pressure put on them about tend to lash out and behave in immature ways just like Rory.

I think what made Rory the person she became at the end is the fact that she had such a close relationship to her mother to the point where she couldn't make decisions on her own after a screw up. I'm not saying that it's unhealthy or wrong, it's definitely good to be able to talk to your mother about anything. But mothers want the best for their kids and sometimes holding them accountable won't make the kids happy short-term. Growing from your mistakes is uncomfortable and ugly but Rory seemed to want a short-term fix for that from her mother. Remember when Logan proposed to her? She needed her mothers opinion on what she needed to do.

I’m gonna be the one who hated both Lorelai and Rory. Lorelai always wanted to be Rory best friend when it suited her and her mom when Rory didn’t act how she wanted her to. Her parenting skills sucked big time and I hated how she made it seems like life was against her when everything was the results of her own choices. Plus she used and broke Luke several times, we all had to watch her crush that man’s heart again and again then complain about being alone. And Rory, Rory, Rory what is there to say about that insufferable brat. I think what really annoyed me is that despite everything Lorelai teached her about that privilege life she decided to go for it knowingly but still managed to blame others when it crashed. She completely lost me the day she slept with Dean because of the reasoning of why she did it, not even because she still loved him but because she had him first he was supposed to be hers and she was envying the life he was creating with his wife. Lorelai never raised her to become the entitled brat she became and the last 2 seasons were so hard for me to watch

Remember when Paris said during Chilton graduation that "valedictorians don't end up having a great future..." And we all thought she was jealousy of Rory that's why she said it? Well , I don't think she was wrong. Paris has degree in everything imaginable. And Rory... Well... (this is not to all valedictorians, this is just with respect to the show)

Growing up my mom was a super relaxed parent (drugs played a part) so I grew up with a lack of structure which led to me almost always feeling uneasy (which turned into severe anxiety) and honestly I acted out at times when people challenged me. Now I choose to live a life with more structure and discipline 😊

The confidence of young women is shocking. Turns out life isn't as easy, especially when you believe you are smart.

I think people need to reconsider what we consider as "failure". Modern society puts a lot of emphasis on being successful, but plenty of successful people end up being depressed and just don't want to be under pressure to perform basically. She might not have everything figured out, but the point is that being the role model child actually sucks most of the time and adults end up being more flawed. Just because someone is a dropout doesn't mean it's the end of their life. People need to get into art or hobbies and stop equating their worth with having a career and being successful.

Nerdy Teenage Rory spent her life being told she is super smart. She was the darling of the town and everyone catered to her. Adult Yale Rory was the result of a privileged child being told she is super smart all her life. One professor hurt her feelings and she drops out of Yale and steals a yacht. Most people who were not as sheltered would have switched majors and used that moment to realize they are not as smart as they thought. Mitchum Huntzberger turned out to be right. People like him usually do.

The thing about putting people on pedestals is that you doom them to failure because they will inevitably fail and they will inevitably “prove” they were never perfect, which isn’t a crime, but they way some people act, especially to Rory, you’d think it was.

But what happened to her trust fund and Christopher’s money. She was meant to get the trustfund at 25 and at 30 she’s totally broke?

I'm sorry, but having a child before you should it is not good, and only you interpreted as it was ok to have a child being a teen or if you are studying. Who's paying for your studies and your life? And no matter what, your child is going to suffer. So don't make it like rainbows butterflies and "if you dream it you can do it" kind of stuff because real life is not like that. You have to own your fk ups and not let your parents take care of your child or a badly payed nanny.

Rory probably got pressured from the high expectation put on her from also everybody. Being put on pedastal might be overwhelming and let one to get away with some flawed decition. I guess also discovering her family roots that her mum tried to cut her off from might changed Rorys perspective and shake somebody's identity and morals. She somehow got stucked between expectation and style of living between rich upper class and middle class that she was brought up in.

Im glad she fail. That’s extremely realistic. If you lve ever meet people like this many can not handle not being at the top, and being average. Which happens once they hit college.

Why is Lorelei’s past Rory’s responsibility? Rory is her own person, isn’t she? So she really shouldn’t have been measured up to a certain standard. Maybe hearing that all her life is the issue.

I think Lorelei was a great deal responsible for how Rory turned out. She facilitates a lot of the bad behaviour Rory displayed like how she lied to her boyfriend. She also was not always a great mom. She had to look after her mom and that's just a lot of pressure to put on a child. I also find it funny that when Rory became more like Loralei, she became a failure. She reacted to the things her mom was telling her.

I see Rory's situation in several women, they are the independent and the strong ones and reject the "good guy" after they are over 30 and so many get desperate and end up like this

I blame the bangs.

Finally figured out why it’s so sad/disappointment of Rory in her 30s. She’s not broke. She still has her mom and grandma to go back on. It’s like she wasn’t even her. I’m fine with her being broke and struggling. But she didn’t seem like her.

I think it's not a problem that she's not married and she doesn't have a career and she got pregnant. I didn't expect from her ALL of these. But she was supposed to be intelligent, so she could have made decisions that could have lead at least one of these. I don't mind the lack of career if she had married someone or at least have a healthy relationship with someone. Anyone. I wouldn't mind the lack of significant other if she had a job. She chose to pursue a career which is great, so at least have some kind of job. (shit happens all the time even to the most prepared ppl, it's not a big deal) Even if it's not the best job, she could have some goals to reach, for example getting a promotion, saving up for an apartment or providing for her pet or houseplant or something. The writers needed some drama and they screwed up her character. (and Lorelai's too but that's another story) I wouldn't mind that she feels like a failure in the beginning of the sequels, that's a good foundation to build on. But ALL her problems were caused by her. You know what? The lack of career, goals and healthy relationship is completely forgivable. But I hate that she was still a selfish brat who clinged to an engaged man, she had refused maybe ten years ago. Without the whole Logan storyline the ending would have been totally... okay.

great analysis! i totally agree.

Your way of talking is very sweet and calm 🌟

She was NEVER perfect. Can we get to a point where we're just honest about the fact that the seeds of who she became later were already sprouting in the first couple seasons? Maybe it's because I watched the ahow for the first time ever as an adult, but ALL of the Gilmore Girls are lowkey monsters. I'm not saying that as a criticism. It's part of what made the show so funny to me, but let's be real, Rory was always a bit entitled, a bit self involved, a bit selfish...a LOT spoiled. And she was rarely checked on it. Why is everyone so surprised at how she turned out?

she should have been cast in 50 shades of gray.

Rory is the most messed up character i've ever seen. She didn't get better, she only got worse and worse till coming to a point where she is actually an immoral person with no dignity.

I liked Rory. She sucks sometimes but she's a human like everyone else.

I think people would have accepted it more if they had shown her downfall(she already struggles with rejection cause she is a perfectionist in the show, 2008, depression, she can´t focuss cause she is already too drained from trying for years and not making enought to afford crazy rents, stress...) instead of just showing her straight falling alseep during an interview. It was a hard balance to hit, to continue an upbeat show while recognizing that the reality Rori encountered was not the reality Lorelai found in the 90s. Still, I´m happy with what they did.

Rory should have chosen law

Rorys tragetory was planned by the palladinos to be like this but you guys are not ready for this conversation.

I have many thoughts on the Year In the Life reboot, many of them bad, but I really will never wrap my head around how they expect us to believe in all that time Luke and Lorelai never got married or had a child. I wish we had tuned in and seen a 9 year old brother or sister for Rory. Seeing the new-to-us family dynamic between Rory, her new, much younger sibling, and how Luke and Lorelai are as parents to their small child would have been vastly more entertaining than the crap that was served up to us.

I'm not familiar with your work but you seemed really out of breath in this video. I hope you are ok! Interesting thoughts on a classic tv show

The main issue is that Lorelei and everyone around Rory made it clear that no matter what she does, they will always take her side. Even when Rory and Dean broke up, Rory had immense support for no reason. That's the problem. In ethnic households, you know that if you cross the line (depending on what your parents believe in) that's it. You will simply become homeless or beat to a crisp. As humans, we have a survival instinct so we behave ourselves to avoid unnecessary punishments. This doesn't apply to abusive parents with mental disorders btw. Anyways, if Lorelei gave off the vibe that cheating is completely unacceptable, Rory wouldn't turn out like that. But instead Lorelei even chose to run with her daughter on her own wedding day, which sets a crappy example. Many people in the show failed to see Rory as an actual human being and more like some kind of barbie doll who's perfect. Even when Rory got caught making out with Logan, everyone assumed it was his fault, but she initiated it.

I like this! I hope something like this happens to Lisa from "The Simpsons" showing that; not all life is just grades and perfect attendance. There are way more options in life, and even if you went to Harvard, doesn't mean you are destined for "easy street".

The weight of expectations was overwhelming and a bit unrealistic: her working mother is single, dependent on her parents for her daughter's prestigious HS tuition (the only thing that got her into an Ivy League, imho). Father is absentee rich dude. Lorelei reaaally wanted to go to Harvard and lived vicariously through her daughter. I never understood if an Ivy league education was really Rory's dream or if she liked literature and was content on becoming a teacher or writer (not a journalist).

Ik this is an old video but its not quite fair to place all blame on lorelai and richard/emily, there is a certain age where you are fully accountable for your actions regardless of your upbringing. Yes they had a hand in the problem rory is still accountable for sleeping with dean, stealing the boat, and anything else she did

The ending was completely contrived. The writer said she had planned it from the beginning, then when others took over the story moved away from the original intent and when she wrote the reboot she had to force it. It felt totally forced.

The character just had to grow up and that’s what girls her age / demographic did in those days.

I feel like theres all this unresolved traumas and character development that we just never get to see because ASP wasnt interested in doing it. But i never hated that Rory became spoiled and entitled because tbh the way she was raised it makes sense but the narrative always painted it as a momentary plot line as opposed to the consequences of everyones including her actions. Mitchum was not the villain for pointing out Rory wasnt a great journalist, he was right cause clearly that wasnt the path for her. We couldve gotten some great character studies and we didnt. Love the show but the lost potential in it hurts me

rory just… cracked… burned out

I love the video and you are so likeable, delightful listening to you 🤗 Gilmore Girls are one of my favourites, I relate to them

the way i haven't watched this show but have watched numerous video essays on this

I miss GG, the original

She is also Chris’ daughter…

I think people are being too hard on Rory. I don't dislike her, but some of what she has done makes sense trauma wise. Even though she has Paul, who is available for her, she draws in emotionally unavailable men. Whereas Dean had never been good at communicating his feelings, the rest of the men she dated or had affairs with were all emotionally unavailable, just like her father. I'm not saying she's right. But she literally forgets and ignores the one guy who is available. She doesn't realize that she was also ignoring the interest of Jess, who is available, but she gets too wrapped up in what was (in my opinion) because it's like losing her dad at Sookies wedding all over again. "Go be someone else's dad." The hurt on Rorys face said a lot that didn't need to be said. A lot of kid that also grow up in unstable family's, or even emotionally disfunctional families, without their father, have a child's chances at success far lower than most, doesn't mean that child can't succeed, it will just be harder. I truly believe why Rory didn't quit on her dream after so long was because of her towns humble and small town support, which may have been silly, but was a normal she needed. Luke's, Kirk, Miss Patty's, Babette and Morey. Kim's. Dean. All these people all these places and relationships were norms and healthy in her life. She had a community that cared. I believe that's actually the reason she was so successful, besides having Lorelia support her, she had a town that protected her. It wasn't the town, but really the image she was trying to maintain that caused her downfall. Rorys always been the same as she ever had been. She just decided to do the things she was afraid of. And then she got obsessed with the feeling, at least that's my opinion. I think she felt she needed a little chaos subconsciously, without realizing she was doing it, because she is never seen as having any faults and the more she realizes people will put up with toxic behavior the more she subconsciously thinks it's okay. She's reaches out to unavailable men because her mom, in what I've observed, has always been the one to keep arms length with other men. Her father kept her at arms length with their relationship. Her grandmother and grandfather with their daughter and a little with Rory. The only really healthy relationship she really saw was Richard's and Emily's, weirdly enough, so of course she'd run after one that seemed like it, while still having that distance like how her mom had with other men and her father had with her and her mother. It's trauma, most people don't realize how badly they come off, because it's a learned habit, or trauma makes them react without realizing, mostly because they surround themselves with either pushover, or people who have similar trauma. I believe it's all on a subconscious level. I think it's brave the direction Amy took Rory, even if it wasn't popular, because it was honest and real. I admire that about her stories. So welcome to the little corner of the world. Later.

What I do not understand about the revival is how a girl that graduated of one of the top collages in the world, had the formation of a top high school were she graduated as a valedictorian, was editor of the Yale Daily news, hace Mitchum mentioned her in one interview (even though she hated it, it is excellent publicity) and have the contacts of their grandparents, could not get good job opportunities? Also, they are telling me that she has no money at 30, when she had a trust fund (that she got at 25) and had a Birkin bag which is ultra expensive and re-sellable. I understand that it’s a competitive world out there (maybe she splurged the money), but having Rory fail so miserably when she had all the tools and privileges does not make sense to me. Finally, I understand that most of the revival was planned to be part of the original run of GG with the original producer (that got switch in S7). I think it may have a little more sense then. I heard that in a GG Podcast that Amy Sherman Palladino doesn’t like millennials that much and maybe that is projected in Rory 🤷🏻‍♀️.

Currently rewatching and am at the part where she’s living w her grandparents after having dropped out of Yale and people say this and that about when her downfall was, but most people link it to either her sleeping with Dean or her stealing the boat (note that the two points commonly equated to her downfall are the two points in her life where she stops speaking to her mother). While I think that the stealing of the boat ultimately led to what is her downfall, I think she could have turned it around had she continued with Yale and not split from her mother. But she did because she knew her grandparents would idolize her and make excuses for her, so she renounced her mother for being upset and ran off to the people who will never publicly admit that she can do any wrong. And this is reinforced multiple times, such as when Richard and Emily make a big stink at Rory’s court date when she got sentenced to community service, which is pretty much getting away scot free comparative to her crime. Or when Richard yells at Mitchum for “destroying that girl” when he finds out what Mitchum said to Rory, blaming everything onto him and not thinking Rory might have the tiniest bit of responsibility, or that maybe he’s biased towards his granddaughters journalistic pursuits. Now I’m not taking Mitchums side here necessarily, my point is just that Richard and Emily immediately jump to Rory being the victim and never any sort of antagonist in her own or others lives. The downfall of Rory Gilmore was moving in with her grandparents and dropping out of Yale. Admittedly, Rory had always been a rather privileged, spoiled, and entitled girl but not to the point of completely failing herself, just to the point of a lottttt of middle and upper class white kids. However, as the series continues and she gets more involved with her grandparents, her privilege swells from being your typical middle class sheltered girl to having an ungodly amount of old money at her fingertips. When prior to connecting with her grandparents she had always been taught to problem solve, afterwards her problems are either solved by her grandparents before they even become problems, or she just runs to them and they throw money at it. She no longer understands what it’s like to struggle in any capacity, and now she has these two people who are incapable of condemning her actions publicly and, although there are a few fights here and there, ultimately they see her as perfection and the peak of innocence. When she gets into a relationship with Logan this privilege and entitlement is only amplified and when she runs off to her grandparents house after dropping out of Yale, she seals her fate and completely goes under, drowned in her own entitlement. Even when she ultimately goes back to Yale and ends things with Logan, while at the time maybe we thought she had pulled herself out, but in TYIAL, we come to understand that no, she did not. She may have gone back to Yale, but she still carries the same sense of woah me entitlement about work and success that she did when living with her grandparents and she’s having an affair with Logan, completely disregarding her partner and Logan’s partner, once again putting herself into the very same victim position as she always has. This is too long so I’ll end it at that

WAIT. why are we assuming the baby is logan’s and not the wookie’s??

Im rory

I don't know if it makes sens but I think it was unconscious self-sabotage because everyone in her life had so many expectations for her when in reality she wasn't that special

This is one of the most brilliant fascinating arcs of a character ever written. Kudos to the Gen X Palladinos.