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I’m non binary too and I go by my first name which is Chance and also they/them as a backup And for me personally I wanted a hairstyle that’s in the middle between long and short can’t really find one yet
fair enough. im getting my hair done tomorrow (mullet + dyed) and i know its gonna be expensive but my parents dont trust me to do it myself. im super excited, tho
My first "gender affirming" haircut was when I was 14, and my mom thought short hair would look good on me. Ironically, she is now a raging transphobe 😀🙃
"I just think", "I know I ended on 'I just think' but I don't know what I just thought" must be one of the most relatable things...happens too often, like, no idea what going on in my own mind 🤣
I think people tend to think of gender affirming haircuts, gender affirming clothes etc much more at the beginning of their transition. After a while it just becomes part of your style and totally normal and you don't necessarily consider it gender affirming anymore. But at first everything is new and exciting. That's how it was for me anyway. The wom*n/m*n is very weird to me as a nonbinary person lol. Just say it's gender neutral. On the other hand I think folx vs folks is not necessarily about gender neutrality, it's more of a punk thing. P.S currently considering flying to England from Germany to see you on tour
Thanks so much for being here and posting. I live in Canada and there has bean a lot of crap against trans kids. As a trans kid this has made my life so much harder. You music and general online presence has been helping me through this stuff. Your so awesome.
My 'when allies try' moment: A school counsellor told me not to worry, that he would make sure i would socially transition quietly so people wouldnt know, even though im very open about being trans. he also told me i had to use the unisex bathroom thats in like a weird far away place from my classrooms so i didnt feel uncomfortable or unsafe. didnt do anything wrong, just not quite right
Years ago, realizing I would eventually lose my hair, I started shaving my head. I didn't know at the time that this was my way of dealing with gender dysphoria, because I did not want to show visible signs of male pattern baldness. Now that I've come out as nonbinary agender, I guess one could say that shaving my head is a form of gender affirming haircut.
Lmao YES, I try to be gentle on the ones who are clearly trying, even if they don't quite get it perfectly just yet. Meet people where they're at, and all that. We're all on a journey, and if their journey is already on the way towards being more accepting of other people, who am I to make them feel bad for not being at the destination yet? At least, that's what I try to do. Sometimes I get impatient and try to just throw people in a wheelbarrow so I can carry them along the path to acceptance faster, but they usually don't like that 😅
5:50 actually, here's an interesting fun fact from Germany: Since German isn't a very gender neutral language and if there is a group of teachers, they will all be called the male plural (die Lehrer), if there is only one male teacher in there, there have been people who invented a thing called "gendern" It is either a _ or a : or a * in the word, which symbolises a slight pause you make while speaking to kind of "leave space" for everyone who isn't female or male and to separate the gender including word from the female word. Example: Die Lehrer - male Plural Form Die Lehrerinnen - female plural form Die Lehrer*innen - inclusive Plural form. However, gendern is heavily discussed in Germany and there are many people that hate it and make fun of it. Some say it sounds unnatural and others say it's a grammatical disaster. Others really have something against including people that aren't men.
I know right! Like, it’s really not that hard. And as far as I know nobody wants to force anyone to use gendern when they talk, wtf are they talking about “taking away free speech”
I've watched people get so enraged when I've suggested to use all female plural in a group of mostly women and like one man. Like I've insulted their mom. But when non-men wanna be included it's "Genderwhansinn". Pathetic. Though tbf, I prefer new gender neutral solutions that flow well language-wise over the Gendersternchen any day (look up Entgendern nach Phettberg and the De-e-System)
@@icarusxedits exactly! And then exactly those people talking about "taking away free speech" want to ban gendern - apparently they only care about free speech when it benefits them.
I saw a “folx” earlier today and I was like “that kinda feels nice cuz like they’re probably trying to be inclusive but isn’t folks already gender neutral and inclusive?”
from what I know it's more of a punk/scene thing, like punks sometimes used to be spelled punx sometimes, but were so used to the x being used for gender neutrality that we automatically assume it's that
@@Link-dx1lx it was my education professor using it in a PowerPoint for our lecture so I don’t think she meant it in a punk way lol but that’s good to know thanks
I very much relate to you going to a Conservative boarding school. For me, a Catholic Conservative boarding school in a really homophobic country. I've got a few months left but your videos and music are very encouraging and just make me feel better and more hopeful about life... in the past couple years I've been watching your videos you've helped me through my dysphoria ....you and Corry are very funny, love your videos together ❤ Thanks Noah!
As an ally who really wants to be an ally I appreciate being called out on these things! Once I did the randomly drop the “yeah she was called X before, insert dead name” and I wish had been called out earlier. 😢😅
Longer haircuts are often more expensive than shorter cuts. All they're doing is specifying the gender affirming in their description. Longer haircuts generally take more time. It probably could have been worded better. Like throw gender affirming at the top and then go into pricing for long versus short cuts.
As a nonbinary, I wish there were gender neutral bathrooms in my state that isn't my own bathroom 😭 I just end up going to my agab bathrooms since so many people will look at me strange if I mix match bathrooms ;-;'
Jessie Gender did a video about "women", "womyn", and "womxn". If she did another one now, I suppose she'd have to add "wom*n". And yes, whenever I begin a sentence with "When I was a young..." the next word that pops into my mind is always "warthog"!
The more the queer community can take themselves less seriously and just enjoy being trans, queer, two spirit etc. the more allys we’ll have. I’ve lost two trans buddies bc I accidentally outed them to another trans person and the other I misgendered them one singular time, again an accident. I didn’t take it too seriously thank goodness bc I could have easily been turned off/felt ashamed and shut down. We could have easily stayed friends, too. I really appreciate this video.
The amount of adhd energy is off the fucking CHARTS in this vid. No but seriously, I also have adhd and when I'm particularly tired or a even a little tipsy my ability to word just goes out the window, I feel your struggle, Noah 😭😂
no clue what the frick i am anymore, so i think im just going to say i’m an ally who can decently understand trans people and loves watching your videos and listening to your music
Excellent video! "Struggle bus" made my night! I think I'm the next stop after they picked you up lol I think it's nice they try, but wow, some of them completely miss the mark and I agree, it's great brain fodder!
i am non-binary and have gone to a hairdresser for years. she is married to a non-binary person and has a trans child, both of whom she adores and supports fiercely. in fact, she recently started a nonprofit that provides esthetic services (cuts, colors, wardrobe consultations, massages, acupuncture, the list goes on) to trans people who want that kind of support. her pricing is expensive, though it’s not nearly as steep as the hairdresser that was mentioned here. i am terrified of cutting my own hair to the point that i’ve had nightmares about it. for me, it’s worth it to pay a premium to know that i’m safe when i have to be vulnerable by letting someone else cut my hair.
as a cis ally, this kind of making fun of us is...*so* richly deserved. speaking for myself, I have been a colossal fool about trans stuff too many times to count
I had long hair in intermediate (middle school) and was sometimes mistaken for a girl. Normally form behind when you couldn't see my face. I was also kina small too so that didn't help. I went for a more masculine cut in high school. Now I'm in my 20s and have long hair again (because I'm a punk rock artist) but have never been mistaken for anything other than a man. My body has a manly shape partly help to the gym and I also have a beard so that helps. I'm not trans so I can't relate but I do understand how annoying it can be to be misgendered. I might be a little bit genderfluid though as some days I feel more feminine and like to dress like a woman and act like one. I won't leave the house like that though. Or maybe I just like crossdressing. I'm unsure but whatever the case I'm comfortable with who I am.
on first gender affirmin haircut... Mine was at 15 when i got put with a foster parent who didnt like how my long gender hair was just a mess of hair that didnt look remotely good bcuz of complete neglect prior to then... Tho if we are bein more technical, i had my first gender affirmin hair*style*, which one cud call a cut of hair or a haircut as a noun not verb, when i was 13 and my biomom had moved out of a very rigid exstepdads place to be with her latest new boy toy of the yr; bcuz she and him didnt care if i grew out my hair, but that ex had cared a lot about enforcin such masculinity stereotypes on me My biomom actually loved my hair long and commented many times that it made me look like a rock star she wudve listened to growin up xD Thing is, while technically thats when my long gender was bein affirmed... It took me til 27 to figure out i was long gender and not a man like i thowt; and til 28 to actually come out (i speedran that journey actually, it was from Feb to Oct of one yr; i came out the wk after natl comin out day xD So like, any day now actually (no i dont remember the exact day, facebook does tho; but they wont tell me til it happens :p)) And uh, ive not gotten a single gender affirmin haircut since comin out bcuz my long gender has been affirmed by my haircut since i was a young teen... I dont care to pay money for folk to trim it up for at all bcuz id rather have slightly longer split ends instd of have even ends xD Also like, its the perf length to me and it has been since i was 16 and the hair had grown back from the several inches of it that got removed (tho the thing that rly improved it was the thinnin out of my hair that person did, bcuz my hair was much more prone to matte prior to that and its nvr returned to bein like that. Ive no idea what magicks were used there to achieve that) Im 33 nowadays and have had my properly long gender hair over half my life, tho only been out as long gender for the past five yrs, or under a sixth of my life so far.
I am a baby trans non binary person and a licensed cosmetologist, those gender affirming cut prices are insane. I would absolutely never pay that much for a haircut. The services are exactly the same for a transgender person as they are for a cis person. I like the verbiage of “short cut” and “long cut” rather than “men’s cut” and “women’s cut” because short cuts generally don’t take as much time. There’s no reason for hair services to be gendered. I just got my hair all cut off a few weeks ago and paid $30 US including the tip and it included a wash, cut, blow dry, and style.
$30 for a 45 minute service including tip? In Australia we get paid $23 an hour for hairdressing & most businesses pay above award wages. $30 would JUST cover the labour, no rent, utilities or products. I assume England also pay their staff living wages.
Hey Noah! Love your vids! Yesterday, I got a “short gender haircut” and I would have probably not have gotten it if it was actually called that😭 I would have gotten so scared😭
Asterisks is for gendered languages (spanish, italian, french...) although grammar nazis and conservatives here say it's killing our beautiful language, without realizing that it has evolved quite a bit since Dante's times. lol.
As a trans demigirl who went to a hair stylist recently : seeing a "gender affirming" option would be kinda weird but at least assure me that the people there are not actively transphobic. (I've been received with a clear "we don't do that on men" two times when asking for a fun color) I don't know the prices in the US, but where I live the price for a simple cut for women is usually announced around 40€ (and they often charge twice for actually long hair, dont ask me why it's weird) so 95 would definitely be overcharging.
thank you so much noah for making me feel long gender. ive had so much dysphora lately with being longender, but your vidoes make me so happy that i forgot i was longender. ✨✊✨🏳🌈
In the U.S. (or at least in California) they just put a white Triangle on the bathroom door meaning all genders can use them. They typically put them on single stall bathrooms though, or if the bathroom has multiple stalls they'll make 1 area white triangle and the other a women's bathroom for the buggers who still feel afraid that someone's gonna come in and watch them pee or whatever XD But yah, white triangle = neutral and they stick them on single stall rooms and it's like just not a big deal, ya kno? cost less money to paint a white triangle than it does to remake bizarre gendered figure signs.
In the United States, it is common for women's haircuts for women with long hair to cost significantly more than men's haircuts for men with short hair. So really, this is affirming trans women by charging them $40 more for a haircut then they're charging men.
Noah please do a tour in the us (Maybe even Hawaii bc I live there)! I want to see you irl but my mom wont let my fly out to the uk or to the mainland :(
The gender-affirming prices joke is referring to how "women's cuts" tend to be wayyy more expensive than "men's cuts" in the US. It doesn't matter what kind of haircut you're getting, if you're perceived as a lady you're gonna get charged a lot more. It's like a pink tax where you don't get to choose the cheaper option without making a fuss. $55 and $95 seems really steep, especially if that's not including tip, but I've also been cutting my own hair for years so idk what's reasonable these days
i am a trans allie and i love watching ur channel to learn more about trans people cuz my sister is a teen and lesbian and i wanna learn more about the lgbtq community
Me and my friend were talking about our hair shape/natural style determining you sexuality after my friend bullied my straight hair and I popped the joke ‘hairs straighter than me’ (I’m sorry😂) and her hair is like curly as hell and we were saying ‘ok so your hair is curly meaning you ain’t straight you are gay.’ She then said ‘your hair is straight…. *me standing next to my girl friend* (I’m female as well) we just starred at eachother for a solid 5mins 😂 then my gf decided to hunt her down and chased her into the forest 😂
I think what really bothers me about the haircut thing is that either A). Someone has decided that there is a specific way be gender affirmed for all trans people and that they hold the key to that or B). They’re essentially charging a fee for their allyship because they know that trans people often have a lot of anxiety about finding someone to cut their hair. Literally just put up a sign in your workspace that says you’re a safe space and people will find you I promise.
As a cis lady with horrible hair, I had to hunt out a “gender affirming salon” to find someone willing to cut my hair as short as I wanted it. They even charge me for a “barber cut” (at a very reasonable price). Does this mean I have short gender?
