The is why you are the true queen of booktube: *Youre in a beautiful fairy-esque forest cause why not *you love your friends dearly but are still your own free thinking human *your sense of language and discussion reigns supreme over us all lol * your purple locks are lovely *Im pretty sure the mass of booktube trusts you and knows that you are always kind and honest towards us. *you're the shit pretty much lol
This applies not just to booktube but to life. Have my friends made or done things that I didn’t absolutely love? Yep! Did I feel the need to shout my dissatisfaction from the roof tops? No! Part of being a good friend is supporting your friends and their endeavors (as long as their endeavors aren’t problematic obviously.).
This! So much this! My friend makes wire wrapped jewellery and it is soooo not my style but I tell people about her jewellery and share her posts and tell people how good the quality is, because it is great jewellery for people who like that kind of jewellery. I also bought a necklace from her that went super well with a costume I was wearing for an event, and paid her to make three custom necklaces for fun goodie boxes I was making.
Oh Ariel, you remind me of an elementary school teacher in the best possible way: patient, articulate, fun and caring. It's always so nice to hear you talk ♡
I definitely agree that it's key to put friendships above being "honest" for your audience--because in the case of being friends with an author, you can just exempt yourself from reviewing. Viewers can find someone else to give a critical review. I think it's easy for the audience of readers to say "I would be honest, even if it were my friend?!" and... I don't believe them (people say this in my comments a lot, and I'm like... just you wait!). If/when they end up in that situation, it's just too sticky. If you know your friend will have a meltdown if they hear your true thoughts? If you know it would sour the friendship? Then you don't share! You sugarcoat--look for the good. It's natural. We also bring bias to reading work by our friends--I am far more generous in my reading experience, as I think any of us are when we hold a writer in high esteem. Plus, I know, as a writer, that at a certain point, my criticism won't help anything. The book is out--completely out of the author's control. At that point, it's best to move on from anything they "messed up" b/c obsessing over it doesn't help. It traps the author in an anxiety spiral and keeps them from writing the next book and improving. Sometimes I think those in the camp of "authors should subject themselves to all negative reviews! Friends should dump on their friends' books!" don't understand. When you're friends with someone, you have a deep well of empathy for them... and being super critical, especially publicly, about their book just does not help anything!
I completely agree with what your saying. Being a friend is way more important then being an honest reviewer. But i mostly agree that even if there are a few bad points (not problematic stuff) it's way beter to focus on the good. Especially on social media or in public. Spread good in the world, you can talk about the lesser parts with your friend personally.
Hot take- reviewing honestly and being kind to your friend do not need to be mutually exclusive because, even if you did not love the book, you can still provide a kind and helpful review through this wonderful concept known as constructive criticism. No matter if it’s positive or negative, people are going to be paranoid that you’re not being honest because you know the author. There’s no winning. Readers of these reviews need to give “friend reviewers” the benefit of the doubt, because EVERY SINGLE book review is biased. Every single one.
I think the problem starts at the reading stage. Can you stay being an honest reader or are you more forgiving while reading because you know what it took them to write it in the first place? For me, I know that I read stuff differently when they're written by people close to me. But I don't really care? It is not my duty as a friend to be objective..
I think that's the main thing: I never claimed or even want to be objective about my friends! And that's why I think the disclaimer fixes this whole situation!
Even when it's an author that I happen to follow on social media and like as a person, I am a lot more forgiving, but I think that is for a reason: when you know a person, you know where they're coming from in the book, you'll understand what they've written in a different light, and you'll be used to their speech patterns and voice etc. It doesn't mean that we're blinded to the objective flaws of the work, we just understand why it is how it is..
For me personally, I would just not review a book my friend wrote, plain and simple. If someone personally asked me irl for a recommendation (aka should they read said book) then I would be honest. But to avoid all stress, I would just refrain from reviewing it publicly.
This should be a non-issue. No one can read everything, so reviewers are not expected to review everything. I wouldn't waste my time sharing opinions that people assume that I would have because they expect me to be biased.
I think people often confuse being honest with being rude. You can not like a book, or certain aspects of one, without being an asshole to the author or the readers who do like said book. I think is all in the choice of words, just as you said is SO different "I didn't like this about the book" vs "This is trash and doesn't need to exist" Also! I think most of the people alienating booktubers to give their HONEST opinion just do it in the hopes that they'll get some "tea" in the process......... and that's the tea. lmao Alsooo wow booktube in the forest is something that I didn't know I needed until now.
You ALWAYS review it honestly & politely. Lying & telling your friend they wrote a great book when it's garbage doesn't help anyone. It makes you a lying terrible friend & it makes them think they did something right which means they'll continue to do the same terrible things in their writing. If a writer/friend can't take constructive criticism then they're in the wrong career. And if they're unwilling to accept it then they'll never grow as a writer. I've never once blown smoke up my fellow Word ninja's asses & never will. I LIVE for receiving constructive crits in my writing because it helps me grow & become even better. I love it!
I agree with a lot of the points in this video, however, as someone with friends who are writers, I feel that criticism is Important. These friends actually WANT me to be completely honest with my opinions because even the negative ones I may have will help them improve with future stories. So while I do believe supporting your friends is important. I think being honest is just as important to help them grow as authors. If you aren't honest about what you saw problems with, your friend may not know what needs to be improved. I believe the best course of action would be to ask said friend if they're alright with an honest review. Because if they're ok with or even want criticism to help them improve then it's perfectly fine to give it to them!
This was such an interesting discussion and you truly looked at the situation from more points of view, and realised a complex analysis of what it means to be in that position.
I really enjoyed this and I think it was very well-reasoned! I honestly think that the community should encourage booktubers to be supporting one another rather than being as bluntly honest as possible. I have never met Christine, but if I end up reviewing Again but Better on my channel, I already know that it will focus more on what is positive simply because I want to support her as a creator. Her writing videos (alongside those of many others) have inspired me to be persistent with my own writing. I value honesty, but I agree that honesty is not the opposite of positivity.
I love that you are so supportive of your friends and you look like such a genuine person!!! 😄 Also I am sooo jealous of that forest, sounds so peaceful
I believe that before posting a review you should talk to your freind (the author) and tell them what you truly thought of their book so that they won't be shocked when they read your review
I LOVE how you structure your videos in a very logical and thought out method, like you developed the steps and then you thought about any potential loopholes or anything and it just feels like a well written essay with a thesis and it’s very satisfying!
"These trees, these plants--they're my friends. I want to buy a book that helps me identify my friends." *not two sentences later* "Anyway, today I want to talk about when your friends publish books" I didn't realize that plants could publish books. Where can I find these books?
Granted, I've never been in the position of having to critique a friend's work, so this is my opinion as an outsider. My first impulse is to say that the only way to honestly review a book is by completely taking the author out of the equation, but I understand that us humans are biased by nature, and that would be an unfair request to make of anyone (especially since a lot of people naturally give better reviews to their favorite authors for example). I completely understand wanting to focus more on the positive aspects, and not wanting to completely trash a book, especially when you know and love the author. Still, I believe there is a place where being a supportive friend and honestly giving constructive criticism can absolutely coexist. Moreover, I think it's very important that it does. What I think happens a lot of the time with booktubers who become authors is that none of the people around them will honestly tell them something they wrote sucks, and this is doing them a great disservice. I can't help but think of authors like Brandon Sanderson, whose first published novel was the 8th he'd written, or even JK Rowling, who was turned down by 12 publishing houses before getting a deal. Criticism and failure play a huge role in honing an author's skills. This is what infuriates me about the booktube echo chamber. If no one you're close to is ever honest with you because they want to support you, and you're conditioned to label any outside criticism as "hate", you're never going to get any better. And we as an audience will continue to be bombarded with half-assed novels with great ratings and on best seller lists, because writing has become less about quality and more of a popularity contest.
As an artist that has to deal with giving out my opinion and receiving it from my other artist friends about our works constantly I think being honest is the best thing you could do. Being honest does NOT mean you’re rude, you actually help the person you’re criticizing to realize where they could grow and help them see their work from other points of view ^^ I think if my teachers and friends would’ve kept quiet I wouldn’t have learned anything and made very little progress. I’m thankful for their honesty even when it was a bit rough at times
Reviewing a friend’s book must be really hard. Personally, I think a good review should include both the things you did and didn’t like so taking the same approach for friends~ I really don’t like the attitude people have that “honest review” = negative review.
A lie by omission is still a lie. I commend you on trying to walk this fine line and wanting to do both, but I disagree that this is always possible. The more honest you get, the less nice you can be if you didn't like the book. Being kind can sometimes mean saying something that someone doesn't want to hear, but that they need to hear.
Ariel i love your hair! Also i really appreciate you talking about this topic it can be difficult to objectively talk about something you re personally invested in!
I love your bravery to discuss topics like this with honestly and kindness. No one can do that like you can and I really applaud you for that. Xx Personal I think you are biased as a friend and have NO obligation to review it at all. Full stop. Xx
“If you want to be a true friend to them, be honest and unmerciful.” ~ Lester Bangs, music critic played by Philip Seymour Hoffman in ‘Almost Famous’ (2000)
there is a world of difference between being generous (as John Green would say) with your author friends and being a fraud. your kindness AND your integrity are both self-evident. you are beloved in the community for a reason.
This is now one of my favorite videos of all time, Ariel! You are so eloquent, thoughtful, and charming...and I very much appreciate the sentiment of how honesty does not automatically equal negativity. Also I really just have to say that I am in love with your forest home and purple hair (which matches mine!!!) and I'm pretty convinced that you are a magical woodland nymph. Please keep us posted on your cherry tomato growing adventures - an endeavor in which I wish you much luck. I personally love to grow SunGold tomatoes, which are yellow/orange and super sweet. Love you and can't wait for the Reading Rush!
I think omitting opinions is lying. I've always believed that we need to separate the art from the artist--though this is very hard to do because, for example, I feel it adds something to Van Gogh's art knowing about his debilitating battle with mental health to see how much beauty he could find. But if you didn't know the author you would have just said I didn't like the character but the setting was great. So I don't see why it would be any different for critiquing a friend. It's also a great opportunity for your friend to see what worked and what didn't and grow from it. That's a huge component of critiquing! To grow. But you never have to be mean about it. You can word it strategically like, "this character didn't work for me because X and Y and I would have liked to see "this" instead but I found myself enthralled with the setting! It was really well done!" But honesty from a reviewer is really important to me. Anything less seems disingenuous and fake and it nettles me. I really like the idea of putting a disclaimer. It makes a lot of sense. But I don't necessarily think critiquing means you have to trash a book. But any way you decide to do it is valid and is entirely your choice.
In my opinion (I've never been in this situation tho) is being nice, honest but gentle with your opinions in public and supporting your friend. And criticizing it more in person/privately to them
I think most of the community wants negative reviews based on your friends’ books because they want the TEA, the gossip, the drama that comes with two of their faves fighting over one of their friends’ books 😂😂. Which is stupid because you’re going to feel however you feel about a book, regardless if they’re your friend or not. If it were me, I’d want you to be as honest as possible because that’s how I’d learn and grow as a writer.
I love your hair! It looks a lot like mine, I dyed it purple yesterday 😄 I don't think it's not so much "if you're not saying it's trash, it's not honest review" but more like, if the review it's just gushing about how absolutely perfect and stunning the book is, you start to doubt how much of that is true. You don't have to hate it, just acknowledge it has weak spots if it has them. I think that you can point things that you didn't like without being rude, everything can be said in a constructive way. It might be hard to take at first, because it's their book baby, but the friend will probably learn from the experience of publishing this book and use it to write other books. In that case, they would appreciate the honesty, it would make them grow as writers and they trust in your criteria. If you are respectful and the friend still gets offended, that's their issue, not something that should hold anyone back from being honest. I think that the disclaimer at the begining is a good idea, because you might not notice an issue or a weak spot out of excitement and that's okay. Also, the people asking this question should have in mind that maybe you absolutely adore the book, and then they read it and don't like it, and that doesn't mean you weren't honest, tastes differ all the time.
Interesting. I'd expect my good friend to trash my book if they thought it was garbage. To me, honesty is the most important thing about a friendship. Also, I wouldn't want my friends to spend their hard-earned money on a book in a genre they don't usually read, just to support me. This whole notion is so strange to me.
Cherry tomatoes are some of the easiest veggies to grow, especially if you buy a small, already budding plant from a garden centre. I used to grow them in pots on my balcony all the time. Now I have a backyard and wild animals steal them so its a bit trickier. Also they are ready to eat way before the end of summer.
I really liked your point on how people see “honest” as the same as “negative”. You can be positive and give constructive feedback and opinions at the same time. I hate when people immediately go “are you going to be honest???” straight from the get to as if they have already decided you aren’t because you are their friend. For me personally, I’d probably skip on reviewing books by my friends, there’s absolutely no winning. If you’re negative, people will bash you for being a bad friend, but if you’re positive you’re lying. 🤷🏼♀️
We understand the rethoric argument! But no matter what, I'm not friend of two of those authors but I bought their books to give them a chance. There is always a time to start something!
Honesty is so important. I advise people I know that if a review is foreseeable, I will be honest with it. I am also particular now about what genres I accept for review because I feel that is important too. And yes, discussing things BEFORE I review if I find issue or have questions with it and have access to the author or publisher than I try to resolve that before giving a negative or unfair review. Beautiful new scenery!
This discussion was so well done and nuanced! I hated it when people bashed Sasha’s friends when they gave a positive review of Zenith. I could imagine it would be hard to review a book your friend wrote, but if you honestly like it, you like it! Being proud of a friend is nothing to be ashamed of
I think it’s good to be a supportive friend. However I would write a review that had things I liked and things that could be improved or didn’t sit well with me (if there are things that I didn’t like or thought could have been done better). Even focusing on the genre, like you were saying for Sasha’s fantasy book. You don’t read science fiction so might not be your cup of tea, however people who enjoys readying science fiction may have a different view of the book. I like how you said putting this disclaimer, that shows that no matter what you review of the book you’re telling the people “hey this is my friend so I’m going to support them”.
I haven’t picked up any of the books but I always want to support, but I am like you (despite not being their actual friend) I feel like there will be a bias opinion overall. No matter what typically you will be proud of your friend for taking the time to write a book no matter how generic it could be.
My fav thing about your videos is that they ALWAYS make me THINK!!!! I was mulling over this exact same thing a few days ago. I do not know Christine on a personal level.However, I have been a loyal follower of hers on RU-vid/Instagram for quite some time and even met her at Bookcon. I love what she's about/everything she stands for. I've wanted to make my own BookTube channel for quite some time now, and I thought it would be so cool to have my first book review on Christine's first book! Unfortunately, now I have the same issues you're having! For me, I think it depends on what I think after reading the book. If I love it 100% then there is nothing to ponder about! However, if I like it but dont love it/see some weaknesses in it I have two options. Option #1- Only talk about what I like or Option #2 talk mostly about what I like but also mention the weaknesses I see. I'd like to say I will go with option 2.....regardless, I will do what you suggested with the disclaimer. srry this is so dang long, I just really needed to process all that lol I had so much fun watching your insta story during your move and i hope all is going well! Deadass thought you had a green screen behind you at first lol LOVE YOU AND I HOPE TO MEET YOU AT BOOKCON!
I think honesty should always be more important than your friend's feelings, because you should also be able to phrase criticism in a polite, not hurtful but helpful way. Of course, if you only say "this is a piece of crap" about a book someone you care about wrote, that would just be hurtful. But friendship can't be more important than you honest opinion because the only asset a reviewer has is that perception of honesty that the readers have about him/her. I do think many people are not like that anyways, even when it comes to books that were written just by someone who sent it free to you or something, so I do not usually trust reviews, but ideally I think a reviewer should always put honesty over friendship (specially considering so many RU-vidrs are now publishing crappy things that everyone just wants to push down our throats just because they come from a RU-vidr, as if that somehow made them automatically good or immune to criticism. :P
YES! I hate when people think that they can get away with being petty and negative and hide it under the guise of "honesty" and people just believe that's what honesty should look like. You can easily be honest without being mean or disrespectful, but when someone absolutely trashes something people praise them for being so honest about it. I hate that, but I also think part of it has to do with the fact that people who disliked something seek out those comments really trashing it and because it matches up with their opinion they think it's somehow more reliable or valid than ones that don't. Idk. I'm glad you weighed in on this.
My brother-in-law loves Food Networks’ Diners, Dives & Drive-ins. They came to a dive in KY, where he lives. Guy Fieri, the host, said of this restaurant, “It has all the makings for a great burger.” My brother-in-law laughed and poinred out that he didn’t say they had a great burger, only the makings FOR a great burger. Your discussion reminds me of this story, because you don’t have to be brutal in your reviews. Good discussion!
I'm really glad that you mentioned this conception of how honesty is seen as to equal negative, because that's just not how reviews work? And I feel like this can apply to, not only Booktubers, but RU-vidrs as well. It's almost like there's this higher level of expectation put upon these people to do extremely well at writing just because of their large following, which isn't fair. But on top of that, I also feel like there's another level of expectation put on them to fail, as if they can't fathom the idea of someone in the media being multi-talented (especially in regards to writing, which I honestly find ironic considering lots of video creators write scripts for their videos, so it's not like they have no idea how to write, but whatever). But yeah, it's really frustrating to see people claim that if someone is being positive in a review of a book written by either a friend or someone they admire, then that equates to a lack of honesty, because that's not fair to both the reviewer and the writer.
I'll never be able to properly explain the amount of joy and happiness your videos give me 💚 seriously, you're too precious. also i can only imagine how proud i'd also be if my friends published books! what a wonderful sensation it must be!
I really appreciate that you took the time to think about this. I also agree that being honest does not mean you need to be harsh. I think it takes more skill (which you have) to be kind, diplomatic and honest. I think that you have come up with a good solution to be up front and say I am reviewing a friends book. I think people forget that it is not possible to be completely objective in anything.
Excellent discussion. It's so great that you've found a way to be fair to your audience and your friends. I feel like the general concept is if you have nothing nice to say, don't say anything at all. Unless it's problematic. Love it.
I feel like if I was friends with an author and made a review of their book, I think it would be important to point out all of my positives and negatives and middlings in my reviews AND to be a supportive friend. Like, I would write my reviews with 100% transparency and honesty, but still support my friend in any way I can. Honesty =/= criticism just like positivity =/= bias.
I get your point, but I kind of disagree with you. I understand it’s a tricky situation because it’s hard to be objective with your friends. As you said, an honest review doesn’t mean a negative review (if you genuinely liked it, why talk bad about it?), but I think you CAN, SHOULD AND MUST be critical, which means talking about the good things and the bad ones. It’s both useful for your viewers and your friends as authors. If you give me the whole picture about the book, I can decide if it could be interesting for me to read it or not, because, in terms of practicality, if you review a book and you hide or minimize the flaws in order to be a “good friend”, you’re not making a good service for me. Knowing that you support your friends tells me nothing about the book itself. Also, I truly believe that a critical review is way more interesting for an author than just a positive one, because they can improve from it. In the italian community happened kind of the same thing during these days, and the reviews were still critical e reliable, even though the booktubers were friends with the author, and no drama happened. I’m not saying that the italian community is better in any ways, I just want to point out that it’s possible to be critical AND a good friend. If I ever wrote a book, I would prefer my friends to be honest and critical rather than supportive no matter what, but I get it’s my own personal preference. I hope I made myself clear, since english isn’t my mothertongue😅
You deserve more upvotes. I think its unethical to gas up your friends' work when mpressionable viewers might buy something that's NOT GOOD. I don't see how that can be justified. It's unfair.
@@thakatspajamaz I agree. We all know all of her friends are going to hype up her book even if it's not that good. It's her first novel so I don't expect miracles but from what I've head and read, it's just not good writing and her references are very over the top and obviously taken directly from her own to the point where it's cheesy. And I understand the "I can't be unbiased" but c'mon, they then all go on to say how great it is and it just doesn't feel genuine at all.
Yeah, honestly I’d prefer silence from a booktuber over them deliberately omitting things that would affect my decision on whether to buy the book. So what I’m saying is I’d prefer the Zenith model where everyone everyone just acts like the book never happened over the model suggested in this video .
I think the point Ariel was trying to make was that yes, while what you're saying is true, she just might not be the person to come to for that "critical" review. On the flip side I think it's unfair to hold Ariel (and any other reviewer) to a standard that conflicts with their beliefs or with who they are as people. If those beliefs are harmful then that's one thing, but otherwise I think it's a matter of policing your own internet experiences. Think a review might be iffy? Read another review! Don't watch that review! Make your own review! And, at the end of the day, everyone has different tastes; I for one will forgive a book if it has excellent character development and little in the way of plot, but again that's just me and my preferences.
I totally understand your point, it could be difficult to give honest feedback to your friends, but that shouldn't stop you from doing it. I really love your video 💕
I agree with your solution, that's what I've done in the past and I felt good about it. Just giving that little disclaimer lets people know that it's THAT kind of review.
As long as there's no lying involved then everything is fine. I like the idea of a disclaimer at the front. It doesn't detract from anything you go on to say in your review, but for those who are concerned there's a conflict of interest, well, they can't say you weren't upfront. Honesty is incredibly important when people are investing time, effort and money into what they read, but there's nothing wrong with looking for positives. Not making up positives, but looking for them and prioritising them, especially when it's your friend. That's how a lot of people write reviews for books anyway! When people list negatives, there's often a lot of positives they don't mention. Just like when people list positives, there may be a handful of negatives they leave out. At the end of the day, we all want to support those we love. Nobody needs to apologise for that!
i think there is a time for pure, raw honesty and a time for softness... and the first is, imho, the editing process. during the first draft i try to give good advices in a kind way but i mostly highlight the positive and fanboy with the writer-friend about their work. during the editing i try to be stricter and make them give their 200000%. once the book is out, though, i tend to be soft again. i wouldn't say "the setting is great" if it's not, or rather if i don't think it is, but i would focus on the good stuff, not because i don't believe in honesty but because i don't believe in humiliation. i am honest in my criticism in private, but in public i'll stand up for my friends and family - just like i may think a friend's dress doesn't flatter them and maybe i'll tell them in the changing room before they pay for it, but i wouldn't yell in the streets "god that dress is awful". also because most times these discussions are about the *first* work someone publishes and let's be honest, how *good* were the first works of many many great artists? rarely the first work was also the classic they will be remembered for.
forest = natural props. But for real, the forest setting is so nice! I really like how you handled this discussion because I think it is something a lot of us viewers think about, but I think the majority of us truly do trust the people that we watch which is nice. You always have such interesting concepts and execute them very eloquently.
I’m trying to think about it from the author’s point of view. If I were the author and found out the reviewer gave 5 stars and raves when they did actually enjoy it, I’d be just as hurt as if the reviewer gave an honest review that they didn’t enjoy the book. But if it was a friend trying to shield me, I’d be nervous about what else they were lying to me about even if good intentioned. I love your solution with the disclaimer!
Your videos are so down to earth (no pun intended, kinda pun intended) & eloquent & refreshing. This was so entertaining. Thanks for your honesty & love that you put in everything you do. 💚
I agree with your points on reviewing. I usually rather contact my author friend and tell them when I see something wrong with a book, but for me now and then it also happens that the self published book reads like a first draft and I can't honestly recommend it. I often preffer to read books that are not by friends because being honest with authors about flaws in their books unfortunately often meant an end to friendship. So I rarely review self published books these days, I want to change that, but it's sometimes conflicting, as you said.
This is my first time on this channel and I liked what she had to say. She made some really great points in how to actually review a book. However, I think what a lot of BookTubers are guilty of is talking around the fact that they don’t want to criticize their friend’s work on such a public space. It’s so much easier to critically review a book by like Sarah J. Maas because you don’t know her and have no access to her. But it’s much much harder to critique your friend’s book on a public space where thousands of people participate in a conversation and can easily go to that persons Twitter or Instagram or RU-vid page and say, “hey, did you hear about your ‘friend’ criticizing your book?” “So and so didn’t like your book so I won’t be reading it.” I think this needs to be acknowledged.
This is an interesting dilemma. After thinking about it I decided that what I'd do is support my friend/author by being excited about their upcoming book. And again announce it when it has been published ( show the cover, tell what it's about, etc). But I would make a blanket statement that I cannot review books by friends - for obvious reasons. I know that at least one of the three books you mentioned has gotten horrible reviews. And there will be books that are wonderful. I don't think there's any way you can be totally honest about both kinds of book. It will only lead to hurt feelings, and distrust among the people who look to you for an accurate review. I think by not reviewing any books by friends it will also free you to read and enjoy the books without having to worry about how to review them.
This was so well done and I loved it!!!!! I agree with everything you said and also THAT VIEW ARIEL! It's inspired me to run away and see if a forest witch will adopt me and let me become her apprentice....that or the student loans...one of the two is making me really want to run away. Idk. ANYWAYS GREAT VID.
Nice arguments made in this video. I agree that if a book is problematic, I will write what bothers me even if the author is someone I've met. In general, I look at the whole reviewing book situation from the pov of a writer. It's hard for me to be negative about someone's book because I know how much goes into writing something. So again, unless the book is promoting gender inequality or anything that is detrimental to a human being, I don't point the negatives too much. I mention what I liked about it. What many readers don't realise, or are aware of, is that being a good friend doesn't always mean leaving a 5 star review. Ignorance is much worse than having written something slightly negative about a book. While it might hurt that a friend or someone you care about didn't leave a 5 star review praising the book, and maybe left a 3 star review instead, it hurts less knowing that at least the person read the book and bothered to leave a comment and share it with others. When people write something they didn't like about a book, others who read the review might disagree and want to check it out regardless because they want to make up their own opinion. Someone recently left a 4 star reviewing points good things about the book and what he enjoyed. Did I get mad at receiving a lower than 5 star review? No, because he mentioned he does not enjoy horror stories that much, but even so he said that for those who do like horror, the book would be 5 stars. I am most interested in honest reviews and knowing what readers liked or disliked about a book. I know many authors get really upset when they receive 'negative reviews' and while I can't claim I don't get slightly upset if I get those kind of reviews, I am also open minded and am aware not everyone is going to enjoy my writing. Many authors take low star reviews as an attack at their persona which is wrong. A reviewer is generally assessing the book, not the person who wrote it. They have 'met and interacted' with the book, not with the one who wrote it. Although reading a book is in many ways an extremely intimate interaction with the author, an author may write different books on different subjects. Some might appeals more to a reader than others. Even the style of writing might be slightly altered when writing a particular story. Also, if someone doesn't review a book, we authors think: 1) They hated the book (when in fact the person didn't even read a paragraph from it because they're busy with their job or not much interested in thrillers for example) 2) They don't care about me and are not the friend I thought they are (because obviously if they were, they would at least share the book and leave a brief review). I have learnt that some people are terrible with technology and despite putting links and talking where they can get a book, they still have trouble doing that. That can be interpreted that they are not really bad at technology but simply don't care about your book, or they are in fact absolutely awful with technology and don't know how to order a book online. Anyway, this us a very long comment. I just wish people were more aware of stuff that's going on and don't think so much that their opinion is either going to shatter someone's life, or it doesn't matter at all. These are extreme poles and nice to be avoided. While an opinion can be hurtful, it's unlikely to obliterate an author. And while a highly positive review is wonderful, that's not going to be regarded so highly after a while. Writers are doubtful people and we try to write better. We are almost never satisfied. We are our worst and best critics. I'd be curious to know what are your current thoughts about indie books. If I'm not mistaken, a while ago you hated them and didn't consider them actual books which I absolutely disagree with...I hope your opinion has changed, but if not, I'd be curious to know why you think that way. Have you never enjoyed an indie published book? Good luck with growing cherry tomatoes! They're so easy to grow and so delicious. 🤗🤗🤗 Ps: how can someone hate trees?😲😢😢 Like seriously, they give life. ❤😍😍 I need to ask Jessie what's all that about.🤔
Interesting discussion! I’ve been there, I’ve recently reviewed a book written by a friend of mine (I’m ‘well’ known for very harsh and technical reviews) but she asked me to be as analytical and as harsh as possibile because she wanted to learn and write something better for the future (and it wasn’t even that bad!). I respect this kind of mentality, bad reviews most of the times are very useful to improve. The problem with big booktuber slime Sasha or Christine is that your review will always be biased by the community even when you’re being 200% honest. So any people will be pushed to read them and say what they have to say (I’ve read both novels and my opinion is that they should have never been published without editing like they have been) and this is where the double standards are. Is your opinion more or less valid than the rest of the community? Are you being positive because she’s a friend and you don’t want to hurt her or are you being negative because you feel like you have to be negative, otherwise you’ll be perceived as fake? Great point and video as always
I think the right way is you write your most transparent and technical review and share it privately with your friend. Moreover, make another capsule review for the public that focuses more on the positive aspects of your friend's book and emphasize more on everyone's would-be experience, albeit unique, reading it.
tbh I wonder if "the right thing" and "the thing you should do" are the same thing in this situation. Because I think if I were in this situation, and if I read and had problems with a friend's book, I'd likely try to say as many (honest) positive things as possible, because I wouldn't want to criticize a friend on a public platform, where an opinion could directly impact their sales/income. However, IMO, reviewing that book differently than I would for any other book would feel dishonest in a way, because I'm *not* inclined to give that same positivity to some random stranger's book. I'd be actively reviewing it differently, even though in both cases the review is honest & is *really* there for *other readers* to read & make decisions, not for the *author* , despite potentially having an effect on the author. I think the conclusion you've come to is about as fair of a conclusion as one can reach when put into this situation. If you openly state that you're going to be honest, but that the review is biased and therefore likely not as openly critical as the average review, I think it lets readers/viewers know what to expect going into it. So if they get upset at your bias, it's really on them because you disclosed that upfront.
For me, as a consumer of books and not a reviewer of books, I use honest book reviews to figure out if it's something I am going to be interested in. For me, personally, when I see that the reviewer is a friend of the author I don't read those reviews and I wont buy a book off that person's recommendation of it. I'm not saying that all friends of authors are lying or being dishonest when it boils down to the review, but I have seen a lot of 5 star reviews start with "I am a friend of the author." At the end of the day as a reader not a reviewer it's my money that is going to spent on something that is, at best, a gamble on if I'm going to like it or not and I would rather judge based on the synopsis, the genre and the overall rating of the book than any one or two reviews of it.
i feel like if all someone does with their life is support their friends ... that's a great life?? like what a beautiful thing??? there's always criticism but there's not always such perfect opportunities to celebrate your friends. those things can live in harmony!!
im also not that interested in the "if it's your friend, you have to objective" argument. like if, unlike jessethereader, i LOVE trees and i read ariel's book about trees, I don't have to divorce my review from my tree love for the sake of objectivity. i guess for me at least, objectivity isn't the most important part of a book review.
I agree with everything you said here Ariel. I address the issue by reviewing only the books I liked and simply leaving a Goodreads star rating for the ones I didn't.
It's a really tricky issue! I've always wrote myself so naturally know some writers and I'm just naturally drawn to befriending authors as well. So when they have a new book I feel so excited for them but when they say to me "I can't wait for you to read and review it" I get this conflicted feeling because... eeek... what if I don't like it?! My method is to review it as honestly as possible (and I think you're right it's totally valid to balance the negative with the positive aspects of the book) and if I really don't like it I LIE and tell the friend "I'm sorry I haven't got to reading it yet." 😬 I did have an issue where a friend gave me a film script to read and I thought it was sexist so had to tell him that directly. He wasn't happy and our friendship tailed off, but it was more important to me to be honest.
Love this video! This is an interesting way to talk about books your friends published~ By the way, your hair is gorgeous! Your hair is how I'd like my hair color to look like (top part natural and bottom part dyed purple). How did you do it? (I tried dying my hair purple but it didn't really show T~T)
