"I want to be me again." I felt that. I cried throughout this video with you, Nami. I first started watching your videos like, 5 years ago, I think? I remember seeing your video of melting your hair off with bleach because I was researching going blonde at home (spoiler, I melted my hair off, too). It's been so cool to see you grow and change into the person you want to become. You're not just a mom, not just a wife, you're an incredible woman all on your own. I love how easy it is for me to listen to you, even when your videos are unstructured and you go off on tangents. I love them!
Not everyone are meant to be parents. You being a parent now you will make sure you dont do the things that hurt you as a child. This is so sad but good to release your feelings
@@DH-ts6ho She is a good grandmother, not a great one, and was and is horrible at being a mother to all three of her kids. I could never blame children for poor parent-child dynamics that ultimately are the parents responsibility as the wiser providers, even in relationships with adult-children. That’s not right and I disagree with you but that’s perfectly fine
I'm only a few minutes in (watching as I am working on an essay) but as someone who has been struggling so much mentally lately, loads of anxiety and stress, overthinking, hard to be happy, over the past year or so. It's been so so hard lately, but you make me feel like it's okay to have these emotions and that we aren't struggling alone. Sometimes I feel ashamed for my emotions, but you make me feel like it's okay and normal and to keep pushing forward. I still wear my nachofam bracelet everyday that I received when I was in the 7th grade, but now I am a senior in highschool with only a few weeks left. Middle school and highschool has torn so much of me down over the years, unfortunately. Wearing it reminds me that it's okay to go through tough times and have these emotions and the good memories I've had with being a supporter of yours and enjoying your content. Thank you so much, Namee.
The anxiety and stress is REAL. Thank you for sharing Mariah, especially the last few years has been SO hard with everything going on in the world and little things every day that add to the stress and worries... I totally get what you mean about feeling bad about feeling bad- it's awful... it's so ironic that the actual bad thing is feeling bad for feeling bad when really we should be loving the good parts and the bad parts even the bad emotions that we experience. it all leads us to grow and that takes time and pain but in the end it's going to contribute to the greater picture and helps us to work on the every day one step at a time. will you please email me ???? my email is on my instagram page and also on my channel about page I'll send you so many more nachofam bracelets and new stickers i have !!!!!!! that means so much to you mariah you have no idea... i'm sobbing right now... thank you so much for being my friend and for trusting me and for being there for me too.... middle school and high school was one of the hardest times for me as well and i promise you that it keeps getting better and better. keep doing your self care, building trust and meaningful relationships, and sometimes just finding any support you can with what you can. i love you, you are doing amazing, and i'm so proud of you mariah. I wish i can hug you right now.
@@NameePark Thank you so so much for your reply. Your comment really made my day, my whole week at this point, you have no idea. ❤ I just sent you an email.
Namee, I was crying with you throughout the whole video. 2021-2023 has been such a life changing and traumatic period for me. With the development of anxiety and ptsd that I am currently suffering from, I have lost so many friends and family members who I once loved and treasured. I was even abandoned by my abusive and narcissistic father who I only just realized was abusive and narcissistic after the fact and after a lott of therapy. My newfound trust issues and abandonment issues make it incredibly difficult to connect with people. I miss the person I used to be. For a while it has felt as if I am at war with my own body. I’m considering taking medication myself but haven’t taken the steps to actively research about it as yet. Mental health is so very real and I wish that there would not be such condemnation and more of a willingness to recognize and understand it, especially in the church. I myself have suffered with feelings of guilt and shame regarding my ptsd and anxiety, thoughts such as am I truly saved if I suffer with these conditions and why haven’t I been healed of them? Will I ever get better? the truth as I’ve come to realize it is, as long as we live in this sinful world, we will experience trials and tribulations. However I’ve also come to realize that the only person I can truly connect with, who will always love me and will never abandon me is God. He is the only person that I can talk to at any time of the day, that I can always depend on, that will never fail, that will never let me down. Cling to Him, draw near to Him and He will draw near to you. (James 4:8) When your father and mother forsake you, then the Lord will take you up (Psalm 27:10) I write these verses for you but also write them as reminders for me ☺️I love you Namee, you and your beautiful family are in my prayers❤️
You are SO strong, beautiful Namee!!! ❤ I've been embarrassed to show sadness, fear, anger and vulnerability since childhood due to early prolonged trauma. I find it embarrassing and I feel inferior. I appear always friendly and happy, and it's not fake, but it's my natural, default public facade. I must always seem "ok" even though I never am. 😢 I hold almost everyone at arm's length. I've been on antidepressants for 10 years and anti-anxiety medication for 6 years, but nothing really helps. I am so tired of just existing. I want to LIVE. Thank you so much for sharing and being so open. You are not alone. We all love you. SO many people love you. I love you, and I wish for you to love yourself. You deserve so much love. Including from yourself. ❤
Thank you for being so vulnerable to us. I've been watching since years and years ago, and I've seen growth! Pls remember that things will get better, and life is a journey. We don't just walk in a straight line to go to school, or to go to the shops, we take turns and stop at traffic lights. If we drop something, we stop, we turn around, pick it up, and then carry on. I don't know if I'm making semse, but my point is, life can be fast paced at one point, then slow another, we go backwards and forwards, just take it slowly and trust the process. ❤
Oh Namee ♥️ you’re feelings are so valid and I’m so sorry for all that you’ve gone through. It’s crazy the things we go through as children and how they effect us when we’re older. You deserve the world girl 🩷
I'm sorry, namee for everything youve had to go through. from your childhood traumas to battling the same monsters in adulthood. you don't deserve any of this and I'm sorry youve had to endure so much all these years. I'm happy that you have a better support system now, tools to help you cope and that you've been able stand up for yourself more and set boundaries with those that caused you hurt. you deserve all the good in the world and more 🤍 thank you for pouring so much love in the world and being a wonderful human being. I'll always keep you in my prayers and pray for only good things to come your way cause you deserve it!! I'm actually wearing my old old nachofam t-shirt rn so hopefully if i give myself a hug in this shirt you'll feel the hug on your end! and thankyou for being so vulnerable and being my friend!! I know i've been MIA for so long but i still always thought about you 🌸 i cried and cried when i read your reply to my comment remembered my music and stuff. I'm sure the keychain i made you years ago probably broke so i'll try to make you another one 🫶🏾 I'll always be your friend and support you whenever and in whatever ways you need. you're not alone anymore, i promise 🤍🤍 love you
I see you, I feel you in every way because I too have some deep wounds that I need to get out of me. I’m stubborn and I thank you for constantly being so supportive and loving towards us. Stay balanced love!!!
Love you Namee❤ Times were certainly tough, and it's hard fighting against depression. It's like your mind is shutting off or trying to kill itself and the body doesn't want to respond because it's still hurt and doesn't have enough energy to stop it. You've been such an inspiration and comfort in my difficult moments. I always look forward to seeing your content and seeing happy moments and sad too. We're all struggling too, let's make a great journey through this life. Take care of yourself first to be able to care and give to others🥰 God bless you sweetie!
As someone who never had any problems with asking for help (rather: taking help of others for granted) I would ask myself in your case where the root of this lays, because it moves you that deeply . I wouldn't focus on building community or trying more seeking help, but on healing the root that causes you this level of sadness if you ask for help
I haven’t commented on your videos in so long and I wish I still lived in toronto because as much as it feels impossible that someone else went through the same as you. I did and still do. But the fact that you have such a great support system, going to therapy, Michael, and the strength to talk about it all to “strangers,” raising 3 amazing kids. The past is so painful, and it’s something I’m still learning to move on from it but it’s difficult. I just hope things get better Nami, I know they will.
I have been struggling with my anxiety today…. Thank you for opening up because I feel so alone. But I’m so scared to take medication. At the end when you said you want to enjoy and live and not just suffer and survive is exactly how I feel every day.
Thank you for sharing, i just can say that i understand you, i support you and i admire you even more now. ❤ you're a true fighter in a such an amazing ways, regards from Chile, you've a family here❤❤
Oh Nami..There’s so much I related to in this video and have always felt I’ve related to you Nami.From the childhood trauma,medical mental diagnosis,toxic friendship that also sent me in to a very bad depressive episode,and just all of it I relate so much.In many ways I have felt we have lived a very very similar life so as you cry on this video I cry too..for you,for me,and all who have and currently live through similarities.And it’s not for a pity party but because we didn’t deserve any of this…no child does.I want you to know that you will always have my support.We both will continue to go through this journey together even if we don’t personally know each other.Sending you so many hugs and love always.
My friend introduced me to your channel a few months back and I have loved watching you so much since then. thank you for sharing your story and life with us :( it must've been difficult making this video but I hope it gave you some relief. It was such a rollercoaster and i was crying with you the whole time but i 've felt so connected to you and your life since i became a fan. especially because you and I are the same age, and I had my son at 19. The loneliness that not only comes from having kids young but the anxiety too. From what you've shared all this time I think you're such a wonderful person, mom, friend, and wife anyone could ask for. Even on tough days. There's so much love that you have to offer and i'm really happy that you're here to share it with us. I love you and I'm so proud of you namee~
Thank you for charing! Thank you for asking for help! Thank you for fighting! Thank you for being honest! Thank you for teaching! Thank you for your Love! Thank you for being real with us! Your existenz made my life better! You touched my heart many times, made me smile many times, encouraged me many times, educated me... YOU are a rolemodel as a mom, a wife and a friend! Your are beautiful inside and in the outside! I am manic depressed since twelfe years. I am sober since five years. I have a suicidal best friend and I am about to clean her Apartment right now while she is on vacation :'D because she deveres to feel nice in her home!! And you are so right: helping her is also a blessing for me! I feel needed and valuable and I know that I can rely on her if I ever get into her situation. Sending love and sending hope ❤
hi nami I'm from Saudi Arabia, I don't know if u remember me I don't comment a lot but I've been following you for so long i laughed and cried with u quietly, ur kind hearted and very self aware and I love that ur clear to yourself and u acknowledge things, I like ur perspective about having a community it opened my eyes .. i mean right i am an introvert and I kinda thrive alone but at the end of the day, I am lonely cuz i cut so many people of my life especially my ex best friend for 10 years she was a hidden narcissist and i always brushed her actions as she doesn't mean wrong she loves me and could never ..had so many heart to heart conversation with her, didn't work. she didn't change so now we are strangers and i protected my peace for so long she was my only friend with extra two fake sidekicks that had to always be there. so yeah I'm happy i stood up for myself and yes i feel lonely and no matter how much i talked no one would really hear and act according to what I'm saying but nami hear me for once, i was blessed with one thing and i can't be selfish not to share it with u. it is the only thing that got me through my weirdest unkind days and it's basically my religion (Islam) at night when no one is awake i pray for god and god hears me and take away any suffocating pain I had in my chest before praying. i think Islam is what might be the thing ur always looking for, I don't know if ur still reading nami .. but i hope u give it a try for once and read Quraan, I am blessed to be born as a Muslim and i always wondered how do people survive without such connection and answers that it gave me. it's 4 am here .. i really hope my effort of 24 minutes of writing with my broken english would reach u Xoxo .
Been watching your videos for 5 years, and I wept watching this relating to some similar experiences and so I thank you, Namee, for sharing this as difficult as it was for you. You have made a difference in my life through your content. Love and support to you and your family. 🩷
Wow this was very powerful. So great that you're recognizing your worth and standing up for yourself. I wonder what it's like for your son to hear all this? Is it a way of teaching him how to deal with hard emotions? I remember having to deal with/comfort my parents emotional pain as a child and that it felt very scary but I grew up in an unsafe household so I wonder if it's different for your kids.
I want to believe that you can feel our support. I’ve thought about doing a video like this many times. I’m proud of you for actually doing it. Much love 💕
Thank you so much for being so open about your story. I have always enjoyed your videos! I look forward to seeing what you’re going to put out in the future. It probably doesn’t mean anything much but I am still using the BT21 cooky mouse that I won from your giveaway years ago. The mouse still works perfectly well 💕 The past few years have been rough for me too like with going to university, the pandemic and feeling lonely but I believe that we are strong enough to overcome these struggles. Stay strong Nami!
I totally understand where you're coming from. I have felt for the longest time that my husband and kids are exhausted of hearing me out and expressing my feelings that I took on writing in a journal instead. I would cry sometimes feeling worthless because why wouldn't they care or anyone care how I feel and just lend me an ear and time. I grew up in a family where I was always in parties with family to just being home with the kids and working no family gatherings for certain reasons. But my self , before my own family, socialized a lot. When I try to open up to "friends" they just end up using me for their benefit. Family always judge me for not living the life I used to. If I did I probably would not be married right now and mentally okay for my kids. I too am a teen mom, i had my first kid at 14, so yea growing up was really difficult and I am still trying to figure things out. Who I am now, what will I be in the future? I subscribed to your channel because you're so open about your life and sometimes that's a good thing, like this video. I wish you happiness and health and hope people close to you reach out and you can make a physical support circle that you need. ❤❤❤
Oh nami this was the saddest video ever. Your son is so sweet. That made me cry .. you are a wonderful mom and gorgeous to. I've being following you since forever. Hugs and God Bless .love your hair. I miss your videos on you dying your hair❤
Medication is there because it is needed. Anuone who cant be tnere for uou or show some compassion are not the right people for you. Surround yourself with people who love you and consider your feelings. With the right people surrounding you, you will get through this. Have faith in you and the people who are there for you. Hold your head highyouve achieved alot from where you were as a neglected chi,d 😢😊
It's actually interesting that we see you kind of as a role model due to your positivity, your lovely family but also because of your way to just open up and show the reality "behind the scenes". And at the same time you rely on us to help and encourage you. It's like a huge family, where everyone helps and is being helped. Where we all share the happiness and sadness without gaslighting or making fun of each other. 'cuz that's life. It's the first time for all of us, so help those who think they can't keep up anymore :) Sending hearts and hugs 💞
Oh Namee I’m so sorry you have been put through so much. You are so amazing that you keep going everyday and choose to continually work on yourself and your situation to make it better. The strength it takes to do that is amazing!! I wish more people understood the struggles of the brain. My postpartum anxiety was soo out of hand my doctor told me I was becoming paranoid 😩 but my medication has been a miracle! Baby had to have spine surgery (we knew he’d have to since birth) but he is doing sooo amazing so I feel like I can finally breath and think Loneliness is so hard, not having a robust support system. I’m so glad you have Micheal and your beautiful kids to share love and support. And know that we are always a keyboard away when you need an extra boost! You’ve built such a loving community and I’m proud of you for asking us for help🩵🩵🩵🩵and for getting help in general💕💕💕💕 Don’t forget you rock and are soo wonderful of a person🩷🩷🩷🩷
the trusty emotional icecream bar😭😭🤣 ugly crying n hugging n wiping ur tears namie 😭😭💞 i busted out laughing n crying about the soju n nuts but not soju but needing tissues rajkldgfhjghsdfg i still have so much respect for you and michael and how your raising ur family🥹🥹 we're doing only the best we can do to survive in the situations were handling
Omg Namee ive been watching 5 years and I always felt like we have similar feelings bc of depression but my life has gotten so much better and ive seen your up and downs even with that crazy youtube lady im so sorry life has been bad but i will always be here to watch your videos theres just something special about you dont think youre not
I'm watching more of this brave video. NAMEE...you are NOT stupid. That "friend" was COMPLETELY disrespectful towards you and for whatever reason, felt some kind of pleasure from belittling, minimising, abusing and invalidating your boundaries and your worth. HOW DARE SHE? Those people who sent you the hate messages...I had NO idea. I am so sorry you had to go through that. ❤ You said yourself...maybe they were just having fun, but you would never have fun that way. And that's because YOU are a GOOD, decent and kind person. People who send death threats, involve children in their comments, and who are abusive to people they don't even know are VERY insecure, unhappy, and angry / hurt in their own selves, and they are immature bullies. It is completely unacceptable behaviour, but at least you know that YOU are a good person. Those other people have to live with themselves. Maybe one day they'll grow up. There is NO shame in antidepressants. I also will be on them for the rest of my life. I accept that. It's better than the alternative. There is SO much ignorance regarding mental health. I have come to accept that people will never understand certain things. That most people will never understand me. And that's ok. They don't need to. Only my true loved ones matter. And anyone who isn't supportive, or who remains willingly ignorant...their opinion just can't be relevant to me. You deserve to feel like you can be open, and can be your true self on any given day (and that will change, and that's ok too), and you deserve to be accepted, appreciated, respected, supported, and LOVED. Please never forget that you are loved. You are a beautiful, worthy and valid person who deserves to be here and to be you. All of you.❤
i started watching you many years ago because the makeup hair bleaching videos but I stayed because of your brave vulnerability in sharing your story. even tho I don't really watch make up or hair bleaching videos anymore, I stayed subscribing to you because I love you as a person. I have loved your mental health videos recently to know how you really are and as I start learning about my own mental health. I will be praying for you. i also love adoption and I want to do it myself, so I look forward to videos about that.
I'm watching you video by parts while washing my dishes and stuff. I always said to my now ex husband, how I knew if we meet each other in real life I would love to be your friend. We have a lot of things in common. Honestly, even tho you've been through so much I admire your family (as I'm a single mom now) I think you're lucky, and I wish I have your courage to speak up, to give it all to better yourself. You kept me company while becoming a wife and a new mom. God bless me through you. I know we will met each other in heaven, and I see you and your family, as family in Christ.
🩷🩷🩷 your videos give me so much happiness. I've met my online best friend because of your channel. Please know we are here for you always, through thick and thin. I don't mind watching about deeper and darker subjects, in fact, I enjoy it. It shows me that we are all struggling in our own ways, and we are all connected by that. Sending love over ❤
Zekieeee 🥹🩷 He loves his mama. I also love that he shut the dishwasher. Is that weird? It made me smile. He's like "Ooh, mom, lemme close this for your background."
Namee how have you been doing today I know how you feel I have had heavy pain on my heart to the point where I jut kept it bottled up where I needed therapy to get it off my chest I was released a couple of months ago but other thing have come up on me where I had to faced them alone but I hope you do better and take your time and step you need to recover soon
Today I am doing much better.. I'm going to start a mental health subscription because I haven't seen my school resource therapist since I took a break from school - it's so important for us to have space to talk, get advice, and understand more of ourselves. Have you been doing ok recently? I hope you are also taking time to rest and take care of your health ❤🔥
Aww nami i feel you wanne stay more privet etc, but also we all worldwide had a hard 2years behind us and now we need to keep going like it never happend and be normal again its hard
so agree hands down. it's been so hard for everyone- especially the childrens hospitals filled with mental health cases ❤🩹 thanks so much for being here han..
@NameePark @NameePark Hugs nami! I feel this, it's hard to ask for help especially when you are teen parent because people already view you in a negative way. Also the fact that we are conditioned to figure things out and not ask for help when we needed it. And yes I believe trust too takes a big role when it comes to add, I no longer trust because when I trusted someone who I thought was helping me kinda took my situation to their advantage and took my daughter away and in court she used the "help" as a weapon to make me look like I was irresponsible. I literally had nobody when I was pregnant as a teen cuz my mom kicked me out and i this person who took care of me and trusted so much ended up stabbing me in the back. Mentally, I've been struggling for this past year wanting to scream i really could use some help but cant because i dont trust people helping anymore. I have no family support and my friends are online. So i feel you.I'm sorry you are still having issues with your mom it's such a shame she haven't come around, I hope and pray that she will one day come to her senses and treats you better and most importantly apologize to you. That's crazy how this youtuber and her minions came after you for defending your work like wth. I've also been mass cyber bullied too in some website and the administration had the audacity to ban me and not believe that I was being bully badly I'm not proud but I had a friend hack and knoxk down the website 💅 anyway s I'm sorry that you have to deal with depression, I also feel like I need to get myself checked too cuz a friend that came to visit said that she believes I'm suffering from it too but unfortunately drs at the clinic I am, are useless and undermined any symptoms 😔 I understand too family can be so ignorant when it comes to mental health too. Hang in there tight we are here for you. Stay strong we love you❤️ if you ever need someone to talk to someone I'm always available on discord(yachi) thank you for sharing your story with us. Hugs!
Comment to add. That my ex blames our problems on my mental health, and told literally every soul he met, how tired he was of "doing everything" and people nagged me for relying too much on him, my church gave us (me) the cold shoulder and I left, because other married women were literally bullying me ... I'm glad you still have Michael by your side, and pray it remains that way for the rest of your life. For me, I kind of know I'll be like this for the rest of mine, and I'm too afraid to experience abandonment once more, to open my heart to someone else.
