Hearing your story made me cry. I suffer from bipolar II and ADHD.Despite my diagnosis, I was over functioning at work and in my personal life.I had low self esteem and was a constant people pleaser. I was constantly extending myself to help others to my own detriment. I would tell people in my life that I was stressed and they would still ask me to do things for them. Last year I started experiencing panic attacks. My chest would get so tight that I thought I was having a heart attack. I would get to work and just start crying. I went to the cardiologist and after I found out I was physically healthy right there and then I knew I had to make a change. I have therapist and intake meds. I am getting better at establishing boundaries and I focus on my peace. Thank you for sharing your story. There are so many of us that can relate.
Kish. My sweet Kish! When you left social media, I prayed for you, I cried for you, I would be up in the wee hours of the morning praying for you. I asked God why I carried you in my heart so??? I’ve never met you in person, just experienced your sweet spirit through social media. I constantly prayed for your mind, your mental health, that’s what I was led to pray for. I’m so happy you are still here. I have an outfit I bought from Giti because I seen you in it. Everytime I look in the closet and see that outfit I think of you . Your testimony is gonna carry so many other people through!!! Thank you for sharing. ❤❤❤
Natasha, girl. this comment made me smile big with a watery eyes. I do not take your thoughts, concerns, and prayers lightly. I appreciate you so much for that. The Father is so good! 🤎🥹🤎 sidenote: anything from giti was content postedYEARS ago lol😩 thank you for your support!
Wow. This was heavy and made me tear up. You were definitely one of my top fav influencers and to see you be vulnerable about what you went through has really touched me as a person who also has anxiety. More than anything I’m so glad you’re better and you guys did what was best for you. You definitely put your mental health first and I am so happy and proud of you. Your testimony really blessed me and I needed this. I pray God continues to keep you healthy mentally and physically. 💚
General statement, mostly to commenters: Medication is an important process in probably most lives of people who suffer from mood/personality disorders (I'm bipolar). It's important that we are cautious about how we speak about mental illness and treatment, as replacing medical treatment with religion can make things worse, and has historically brought people to their demise. People with physical ailments have to take drugs for the remainder of their lives and depend on them. Why not people with mental illness? No, drugs should not be pushed on patients in excess, but with good research and a caring psychiatrist (I'm lucky to have one!) finding the right treatment can change your life. And yeah, drug efficacy changes and you have to start again sometimes. But we will be ok!
i agree with you 100%... as someone who's also struggled with mental illness and takes medication to manage symptoms, the #1 thing that held me back at first was the stigma of having to go on meds.... i just felt like a failure because i couldn't somehow feel better on my own. thankfully, i was able to work through these feelings and hesitations with the help of therapy, but it wasn't easy because there *is* such a strong stigma surrounding mental health.
@@maddieb_99 right! I’m so happy you’re doing better now. My life was a mess and I was holding myself back too. It’s as if whole world opened up to me once I found my “cocktail” as they say lol. I couldn’t be happier!
I followed u on Instagram, and felt something in your post , I'm a empath as well took depr meds in my 20s.... I've been looking on every app trying to find u to see if u were ok.. u may have not been seen or heard but I tell u I definitely see you.. thanks for being here and being transparent.. God guided me here for a reason..Thank you 🙏🏾🌷
Kish, oh my gosh...you don't even understand how I feel right now. I wrote a comment on here about how I was waiting for the premiere, but I forgot to watch because I had a TERRIBLE day today. I went through a Rollercoaster of emotions and motions and phases....it was so crazy. So it's crazy how now I'm back home, and winding down for the night, I saw this video in my algorithm and I was reminded that it dropped. And so, the TIMING of me being able to watch it is still so Divine. Thank you SO MUCH for sharing. Based on the title, this video is NOT what I expected it to be (in a good way!). Just like your poetry spoke to me, you literally described all the ways I tend to feel. And I feel less crazy, I feel like I'm not alone. I FELT as if you were talking directly to me, or like you were reading from MY journal! (Minus the influencer part). I'm so grateful that I found your channel, your sharing is so brave and vulnerable and it gives me hope. I got rid of all my social media too. This is actually a secret account of mine that no one knows about. It's so much more peaceful over here in this algorithm. I still got a long way to go, but I'm happy to be progressing. This video offered me so much relief. Blessings to you on your journey! ❤❤❤❤
wow. i'm so sorry yesterday was rough for you.🥹 I'm familiar with those kind of days... its like nothing goes right. I hope the load lightens for you today. Thank you for this comment, it feels like a personal text message.🤎 One thing for sure, you are indeed not alone on this journey. the transformation is mad uncomfortable but i just KNOW the outcome will be worth it. Let's keep praying, renewing our minds, and holding on. 🫶🏾🫶🏾🫶🏾
I gotta say I ended up watching this on accident and then got sucked in. Im happy you are ok and happy you shared this...in detail. Representation across all fields matters and to know that we are not alone is everything! ❤
I love that this was my introduction to you. Thank you so much for sharing a piece of yourself with us. I’ve struggled with some of the same similarities as you, which makes me feel seen and heard.
HalleluYah! What a beautiful testimony. I am a Christian therapist and often struggled with my profession for the very reasons you’ve mentioned. Psychiatrists are just drug pushers and sorcerers (pharmekia) and my colleagues were some of the most drug addicted, depressed, and lost people I knew. The blind leading the blind. The only true healing comes from Christ, the great physician. Writing this comment to inform anyone that if they want to seek therapy, please seek a therapist that’s rooted in the Most High. And most importantly, just go straight to Him who can heal your heart, mind, soul, body, and spirit. Praying for your continued strength and healing. Thanks for sharing your story with us.❤
I appreciate you for sharing this comment, its so validating and real. Without one 1st knowing , as you stated, The Great Physician, they themselves can only help others get so far. Thank you for your prayers as well, i receive with love.🤎
Damn …. Speaking on your anxiety and panic attacks …I can literally feel the heaviness of living life going through that. I’ve had panic, anxiety attacks & depressive episodes since I was 12 and can relate to everything your saying in this video smh. I practice gratefulness everyday and can recognize when I’m not feeling that heaviness/darkness and I give Thanks to the most high! 🙏🏾 Thank you for these self reflecting videos, thank you for being vulnerable ❤
Wow Kish, you don't understand how much you are helping people by your transparency and vulnerability!!! By your testimony it's going to free so many people! Thank you for being YOU in your authenticity.. it's refreshing ❤
You don’t understand how much I related to your story. Thank you for your vulnerability! Seriously because I struggle with opening up and being vulnerable and ik this will help so many people like it helped me. We really don’t know what people go through outside looking in! 🙏🏾😭
As I listened to Pt 1 and pt 2 it felt like I was listening to my story . Someone once told me that my story isn’t for me it’s for the next person . I am soooo proud of you . Thanks for sharing and reminding me that I’m not alone . ❤❤❤❤❤
I teared up listening to this. I can relate to so much of what you said. I’m glad you stopped running and came home to yourself. Love and light to you. I am working on this now❤
Thanks for sharing your story. It’s a story that millions of us endure. Once we realize that the environment we live in is artificial, lack deep intimacy, and authentic emotional connections we realize it’s not our fault that we are struggling. So happy that you and your husband got Bradley back. Pets require care and work but they are naturally attuned. It’s wonderful practice for us when we live in a world that has moved so far away from being connected and attuned to nature and the source. So glad you are no longer suffering and in a better headspace.
Hey love! I am not familiar with your work or your social media content, this just came up on my recommended but i am so glad I clicked this video. First of all I want to say May God bless you, you are so strong. Everything you said in this video deeply resonated with me. The shame, the hopelessness, the isolation, the confusion, the not wanting to be dependant on external actors such as drugs, the rock bottom that it took for me to start my healing journey. You are not alone in this although it feel likes the most isolating experience. You are 100% helping people with sharing your story. I just want you to know that there is a way through, like you said it is not linear. But that feeling you described, the one you felt when you were on drugs, is highly attainable sober. And although that blissful and content state will always have a waxing and waning period, i can confidently say the baseline (some call it your home frequency) can be one of peace. For those of us whose baseline has been dysfunctional for so long, that seems like a far fetched idea but it is NOT. Please anyone who is reading this and going through it, just believe in the possibility of healing. Please take this as confirmation of the pleas you whisper in your prayers, and even the ones you don’t have the strength to say. You are being heard, protected and guided always.
This is the first time I come across your channel. I want to thank you so much for being so honest about your journey. This is what both my son and I have been going through and you have definitely touched me. Thank you!!
Rewatching this video and sending you so much love. Your presence has been greatly missed, and myself, along with so many others really value the joy, fitness, authenticity, love and truth that you brought to the online world. I also struggle with my mental health and understand the imbalance and struggle with antidepressants. Praying that you are navigating through it, successfully and wishing you so much peace, healing, love, support and success in everything you do. Thank you so much, again, for such an insightful video. You are so appreciated. God bless🙏🏽
May God continue to bless you and your journey, thank you so much for sharing! 🥹 Also, a special shoutout to your husband for being so attentive, patient and supportive to your needs. This is rare! 👏🏽
Girl. I can relate. I take delta 9 in the morning and night to help with my mental health and it helps but now I feel addicted. And it’s expensive. I’m praying for you. Thank you for your transparency. God bless!
Hello Kish! Not sure if you remember me or not but this is Janae, I had the honor of interviewing you for your event back in Charlotte 2019. I too disappeared from social media around the same time, for some of the same reasons. I haven’t returned really since 2020. Thank you for sharing your story and journey to healing. As this is heartbreaking to learn but yet inspiring to see you live again! Your authentic story will impact thousands, including myself. Truly, thank you🙏🏽 I hope all is well with you and your husband, I wish you guys much peace, love, joy and happiness! 💞
When i was 23yrs old i experienced my first anxiety attack and what followed was depression, even though i didnt know what that was at the time. I was burnt out from trying to stay in college and have two jobs to support myself and boyfriend. I didnt know how to ask for help and that turned into me shutting to the point of quitting school and both jobs. I literally didnt work for 3months. And i didnt go back to school. I have felt alot, if not all of what you said. I looked for things to make me better. But i think the truth is, once something like anxiety and or depression happens to you, theres no turning back. You dont ever get to feel like it was like to be before that moment or those days that followed. You do get to move forward, but its like you said, after you sacrifice for a new "you" or a new way of being. But thats also the scary part too, not knowing what that looks like. Thank you❤
wow thank you for sharing a piece of your story. Most can’t understand that once it hits a point of shut down, you’ve already mentally checked out. I really hope you are making your way towards the path of healing. If not, the best time to start is now ♥️
Thank you for sharing. This vid has allowed to understand some things about depression and anxiety. Wishing you and your husband peace and progress on your path in life. Time to confront myself as the only nemesis I have know and addicted to.
Beautiful testimony 😢I went into a dark place myself after divorcing my narcissistic ex husband. Doctors prescribed me the same medicine. I no longer take it but I do take Buspirone as needed. If it wasn’t for God and my baby boy, I doubt if I would be here typing this right now. Mental health is real and I am so glad that never gave up and that you had an encounter with the holy spirit. May the rest of your life be blessed. Shalom ❤
wow, thank you for sharing a portion of your story with me. i can nly imagine the amount of faith and trust it took for you to hold on. Praise Yah for His love.🤎
Kish, your vulnerability and transparency in this series has been amazing. You are blessing so many people and opening up a much needed conversation in communities of color. God bless you on your journey and bless us anytime you want with more poetry.
Thank you for sharing! I followed you on ig and you were my inspo to start my loc journey. I wondered what happened but I had no idea the battle you were facing. I struggle with mental health as well. You are more relatable than I realized. Thanks for being so transparent and authentic. You got this!
This is so vital for many to see! I’ve suffered with my mental health and can relate to some of this but God is most definitely a healer! It doesn’t matter what anyone says! Yes therapy works for some, but the one that created us has all the resources. How are you doing now?
Yes you are absolutely right! To be honest with you Kelley, I have a peace that surpasses all my understanding. Everything isn’t perfect but peace sure feels like it is.
I’m so glad I found your channel & your awesome content again. I met you at an event in Charlotte, NC about 8 years ago & you were one of the speakers. I went up to you after your session & you took the time to talk to me. You gave my question your full attention. I said, Lord she is a kind & humble person. I saw so much warmth in you. Some of the others were stuck-up & rude, but not you. Thank you for doing this video. What the enemy meant for evil, God turned around. You cried out to Him that day & the Lord answered. He will do the same for anyone. Thank you Lord, for this beautiful soul who is helping so many people with her voice. ❤
wow what an encouraging comment, This truly warmed my heart. I wish I could say I remember what event but that was wayyy back! Was I on a panel by chance? Nevertheless, I always say that pure spirits recognize their own 😊 that’s amazing how our Heavenly Father works. Thank you so much for listening and being here. I truly appreciate your message. ♥️🌹
that was very inpiring and real. you are a really good story teller. i feel i need to quit all distractions myself. i have found a really good mentor/healer but part of me wants to keep distracting/not facing/not listening to my intuition. it really does take self love and deep commitment. look forward to more content
I'm so happy to find you here. I've never met you, but like others I was concerned with your sudden departure. I sent you an email, but it was returned. I hope you are well 💜
I've wondered what happened to you! I followed you on my original IG account when I was exploring opportunities as a Group Fitness Instructor. For my own reasons, I deactivated that account, but found you on a new one I eventually created that was truer to who I was becoming. Do what you have to do to become a person you can love inside & out! People love you! Those who understand. But what matters most is your ability to love yourself & to embrace your own evolution. Thanks for sharing & for letting us in!💜🙏🏾🤗💐
I can relate so much to the mental health component. I struggle with telling people what I going on because I’ve always felt like I was the only one. I’m single and I often wonder if there will ever be someone who will love me despite anxiety and panic. It’s been 5 years with these issues and it’s probably getting worse. Although I wouldn’t wish this on anyone it’s also A comfort knowing I’m not the only one, especially in the black community. Thank you for sharing, Your honesty and vulnerability has helped me.
@@KishUnleashed I’m definitely still in the struggle, but I cope by going to therapy weekly, I was on medication, I was taking lexapro I gained tons of weight, I got off for 6 months then started back with venlafaxine, gained another 20lbs and when I got off of that medication that was the worst withdrawals I’ve ever experienced. I’ve since stopped taking medications daily but I have hydroxizine for When I feel like I’m going to panic, I also use the DARE app for their daily Audios. I’m really just keeping my head above water.
Thank you for sharing. I applaud you for your transparency. The part about "making decisions that no one will understand and they are supposed too". All that matters is that you are aligned and you feel at peace with your own choices. You are so inspiring. Wishing you much success and many blessings on your new path. 💜
Kish!!! Thank you for this! Your authenticity and kind spirit is felt. I pray that God may allow you to see and feel how helpful this is for so many of us out here. I'm thankful I came across your channel a few months ago (it was definitely a divine connection), bc i quit social media many years ago and limit my use to youtube and pinterest. We share similar stories and i understand exactly how you feel. Just KEEP GOING in GOD's flow. Praying for your inner healing, joy, and peace. Shout out to your husband for sticking by your side. Thats what true love and commitment looks like! Blessings! 🙏🏽🙏🏽🙏🏽
Wow, this touched my heart.... i really did miss your presence on social media, but i understand.... keep being strong, and keep taking care of yourself. Thank you so much for sharing.
I’m glad that God brought your through! I went through similar mental struggles but he was always there at my lowest point when I called on him he was there!!! God is always you ❤️🕊 God bless you sis🥰
Omg I can relate to this. You are helping many people. When you said you cried out to God I can relate. I have done that so many times in my life. I am so proud of you and love you. And you are putting yourself first is truly self love.
This really touched me. I had to hit rock bottom before i called out to God and he delivered me. I seperated from my husband who was having an affair and walked away with our newborn baby. It has been so hard, but God has blessed me so much aling the way thT i know i made the right decision. Thank yoj for sharing your testimony
i'm so sorry to hear this, how heartbreaking.🥹 I trust that The Father heard your cries. I pray that you continue to stay close to Him, especially during this season.🤍
The enemy was trying you. It happened to me I want to the hospital we thought it was covd because I felt like I couldn’t breathe and after the hospital months I couldn’t eat because my mind told me if I eat I would die. I don’t wish that feeling on anyone but I overcame.
God bless you! Your testimony really resonates with me. Because it was my story. God is a healer. It took me years to realize and see that he is the only one to feel that empty void. I cried out, surrendered and sacrificed. And im on this healing Journey as well. So, continued peace and blessings to you on your journey. God bless your husband as well for staying by your side through it all. Most people wouldnt understand. Blessings to you both
I have always loved the genuineness of your spirit. It’s the reason you were always my fitness inspiration. I have a whole video clip of your workouts on my phone that I would use to guide me. Still do. There has always been a realness about you that I could appreciate. I’m big on believing that God in one way or another connects you to the people you need to be connected to for whatever reason. When you went “ghost” on IG I prayed for you the whole time. Not for you to come back to social media…not for any selfish reason. Just because one I wanted you to be ok, two because I wanted God to keep his blessed love all around you & three because I knew if there was anything you were going through prayer would always help. Watching this video…I am so proud of you. I’m in such awwww of your dedication to yourself. God is good. You’ve got this. And when you feel like you don’t have it find comfort in knowing God always does. Girl you are amazing! 💖🙏🏾
wow Alishia, this is so heartwarming and kind of you. seriously, i am moved by this comment. thank you so much for all your support and prayers while i was in the deep. I'm encouraged to keep going, even on days i want to quit.🤎🤎🤎
I'm so glad that you are doing better, and that you decided not to be dependent on a drug to deal with your issue. God is able to do exceeding, abundantly above all that we can ask or even think, Ephesians 3:20. God bless you and your husband!
Praise God for your vulnerability. Thank you so much for sharing your story. It was very moving and now I'm sitting here reflecting on everything in my life currently. I'm at a point where I want to make a change and Idk where to start. So much of this video resonated with me because I experienced the exact same things at different points in my life.
wow Tami, it’s amazing how one story can be shared by many. I’m hopeful that because it resonated, you are soon embarking on a journey to find what’s needed for you in this next season. ♥️
So sorry that I failed to mention that I also GREATLY empathize with your experiencing suicidal thoughts. I pray you were able to make lemonade that’s greater than Chic-Fil-A’s with any enhancements you’ve experienced beyond your pain and throughout.
Thank you so much for sharing, would love to hear more about the spiritual aspect for your healing if there was more on that. Blessings to you and your husband as you continue on your journey ❤
No one will hear the calling but you 😮💨🙌🏾🙌🏾🤞🏽🤞🏽 yess I literally spent my time listening to this at the gym because I knew God had a word through you today! Kishhh thank you so much again and again. No wonder why the devil has been after your soul for so long! Because God has so many mighty things Hes about to do through you! I love you ❤️